Doctor and Ditzy’s Science Theater

by Rixizu

Episode 15 - Part 8

The Greatest Team is Formed and the Competition Continues to Grow 

As time went on, the ponies found themselves competing more and more in the Unreal Tournament. Twilight Sparkle was voted as captain of their team.

Doctor: After an aggressive smear campaign against Rarity and Rainbow Dash.

They called themselves the Mane Six.

Doctor: Figures.

They dominated throughout the leagues and many other game types. They often faced the most elite teams including the Wonderbolts.

Rainbow Dash got her wish and was able to score a few Duels with Soarin'.

Ditzy: Rainbow Dash found it a bit strange how insistent Princess Luna was about it.

After their matches they instantly bonded together and became more than just friends.

Doctor: Unfortunately, he couldn’t leave his true love….pie.

Rainbow Dash and Soarin' found that they truly were meant for each other and they often spent time bonding inside and outside of the arenas.

Doctor: They later had a foal together named Bone Scraper.

The other girls entered many dueling tournaments when not competing in team based games and had to face against some tough competition.

Princess Celestia and Princess Luna decided what Dueling match ups they would like to see most.

Doctor: You could at least be a little impartial Princesses.

Twilight Sparkle often found herself fighting against Trixie.

Doctor: Somehow I figured this would happen.

Trixie entered the Unreal Tournament because ponies were not respecting her skills with magic,

Doctor: (Trixie) Behold a coin behind this pony’s ear that wasn’t there before!

and she felt that she needed to try something else in order to gain the fame and adoration that she so desperately craved from others.

Ditzy: (Trixie) Trixie has it! Trixie will open up a Ponytube account and do angry, profanity filled reviews about movies and video games!

Both mares were masters of the Shock Rifle. Trixie enjoyed taunting Twilight Sparkle when they played against each other.

Ditzy: Unfortunately, Trixie grandstanding and theatrics often got her killed.

When Rarity was not volunteering to help the Princesses decorate and create new arenas,

Ditzy: Where in Equestria is she even getting the time to do all of this? She barely has enough time to finish her dresses.

she found herself faced up against none other than Prince Blueblood. Even though Prince Blueblood couldn't stand getting his coat dirty, he was inspired to join the Unreal Tournament because he was among the upper class,

Ditzy: (Rolls eyes) Sure, this totally looks like a game nobility would play.

Doctor: Is this like Yu-gi-oh where the entire world seems to be based around one game?

and seeing that both Princesses were so fanatical about this game

Doctor: Stressing the word fanatical here.

made him believe that he could gain respect and possibly have his chance at becoming closer to royalty since the Princesses enjoyed this game so much.

Doctor: Him and Princess Celestia have sadly grown distant over the years.

He often found himself having battles against Rarity with the Sniper Rifle. Rarity was more than happy to show him a thing or two about head shots. 

Ditzy: What did poor Bluey ever do to you?

Rainbow Dash often fought against Lightning Dust. Lightning Dust joined the Unreal Tournament because the Wonderbolts refused to give her a second chance at trying out to become a Wonderbolt.

Ditzy: For some reason, not caring about causing civilian casualties is frowned upon.

The battles were super fast paced and frantic. They both had quite the affinity for blowing each other to pieces with the Rocket Launcher and strived to be the very best in the arenas. Both of them loved to taunt each other during their battles.

Doctor: Though never using Yo Momma jokes. They would never sink that far.

Applejack gladly went hoof to hoof with either Flim or Flam. The Flim and Flam brothers figured that they would try their luck making it big time in the Unreal Tournament since they weren't having much luck selling apple cider

Ditzy: That totally makes sense.

anymore thanks to the Apple family's home made apple cider being vastly superior to their own.

Doctor: Strangely, Applejack ended up getting romantically involved with one of them.

Lastly, both Fluttershy and Pinkie Pie would take turns dueling against Gilda.

Doctor: (Sighs) Is everyone fighting someone they might have a bit of a grudge against?

Gilda entered the tournament in order to try to impress Rainbow Dash so she could win her back as a friend and to give Pinkie Pie some revenge for exposing her bitterness and making her look like an angry fool in the past.

Doctor: It didn’t work.

There were many other Duel matches that the Princesses arranged,

Doctor: Mr. Cake vs Fancy Pants!

Ditzy: Mayor Mare vs Hay Seed!

Doctor: Moondancer vs Cheerilee!

Ditzy: Crackle vs Shining Armor!

Doctor: Lemon Hearts vs Elizabeak!

Ditzy: Angel vs Gummy!

Doctor: Fluttershy vs a potted plant!

but these match ups seemed to be their most favorite when it came to the Dueling tournaments.

Doctor: They thought it was a good way to avoid elaborate revenge plots in the future.

Pinkie Pie was the first pony to ever get the ultimate killing spree award, Massacre by racking up thirty kills without dying in the process.

Ditzy: Congratulations?

When Pinkie Pie found her most favorite power-up, the Berserk in Death Match games, bodies would drop like flies. On certain arenas like Carbon-Fire,

Doctor: These names mean nothing to us! Nothing!

she was able to combine the Berserk with the Damage Amplifier which resulted in the Juggernaut award. No pony could seem to stop her until the effects of the power-ups wore off.

Ditzy: So it was quickly banned.

 Many times, the game became hide and seek for Pinkie Pie because ponies would play keep away from her when Pinkie Pie collected these power-ups and Pinkie Pie just loved to play hide and seek. It was almost as if she was playing a game inside of another game which meant double the fun to her. This was even more terrifying than when she would pick up the invulnerability power-up on arenas like Fearless because at least ponies had the chance to gang up on her with their Impact Hammers and try to blast the power-up off of her with its secondary firing mode and grab it for themselves even if she was still hard to catch. She was like the ultimate killing machine when playing the Death Match game type and she got so manic and high under the effects of these power-ups.

Doctor: Pinkie later entered rehab and got her life together after a hard and debilitating addiction.

They were really the only power-ups that she timed and she was never late to try to collect them the second they respawned.

Doctor: Popularity in the game waned because no one wanted to face Pinkie Pie anymore.

Princess Luna and Princess Celestia crowned her as the queen of the Death Match game type and she was feared by all.

Ditzy: Don’t you mean princess?

The more ponies participating in a Death Match arena, the happier she became because that meant more frags and more fun.

Ditzy: It must stink to start a game, only for one player to always win and kills you with ease.

She loved to throw a party afterwards for everypony participating in the Death Match arena with her

Ditzy: That makes up for it I suppose.

because she had fun killing them all over and over again and who wouldn't want to throw a party after a good game?

Doctor: Cake makes everything better.

Pinkie Pie was the most exciting pony to watch with her random movements and wall dodges. She was able to reach places in arenas that many other ponies thought were not possible to get to. Not even Twilight Sparkle understood all of Pinkie Pie's tricks and arena mobility tactics.

Doctor: Not that she didn’t try. Poor poor Twilight.

The arenas were like her playgrounds and she knew all of the tricks and the quickest ways to get around them.

Doctor: And she can naturally teleport.

She also helped invent the option to play games with the multi-wall dodge mechanic so that a pony has the option to dodge off a wall once in mid air and then keep dodging against another nearby wall or object until gravity eventually brought the pony down.

Doctor: Gravity broke down and cried today.

Most of the time, a pony could dodge off the walls about two to three times without hitting the ground depending on how close the walls or objects were to each other. She was like a pin ball bouncing off the walls and many of her other friends really didn't like to play with this ability on with her because it just made Pinkie Pie that much crazier and harder to frag.

Ditzy: Like Pinkie isn’t already broken as all heck.

They only played with this ability once in a while to keep Pinkie Pie happy even though the idea was awesome and fun to play games with that kind of unique ability.

Doctor: So they only use this mode when Pinkie is playing?

Apple Bloom, Sweetie Belle, and Scootaloo desperately wanted to play in the Unreal Tournament when they heard about the stories

Ditzy: (Facepalm) What were you thinking!?

Doctor: Way to be responsible sisters.

 and saw the trophies being brought back.

Doctor: (Scootaloo) Rainbow Dash’s liver! That’s so cool!

Scootaloo really wanted to play this game with her hero, Rainbow Dash, but the fillies were too small to play this game and the Princesses ruled that only stallions and mares could play.

Ditzy: Thank Celestia. You had me worried there for a second.

This game was not intended for fillies and colts.

Doctor: Like that actually stops them.

The Mane Six was a dominating force that gained fame all across Equestria.

Doctor: Saving the world with the Elements of Harmony? Pfft, whatever. Unreal Tournament is the only place one can get real fame and glory.

They were feared by all and they would become legends in the Unreal Tournament arenas.

Ditzy: Unfortunately, those legends were completely forgotten when a little new addictive game called Ponycraft came out.

The end.

Author's Note: 

I am a dedicated Unreal Tournament player

Doctor: Really? I never noticed.

and am an admin for the server [ToJ.cc] Christian Carnage in Unreal Tournament 3.

Doctor: (Author) I frag thee in the name of the lord!

I play with a group of people who play this game every Monday nights on this server at 9pm USA eastern time. My Unreal Tournament 3 name is [ToJ.cc]Mostly_Harmless. I love to Duel as well and I will often put down what I'm doing and play a Duel if someone else asks me.

Doctor: (Author) I have lost several jobs because of this.

Please feel free to join our server at any time to play. I am also their Co-chapter leader and moderator for their Unreal Tournament 3 forums and my name is Mostly_Harmless on the ToJ.cc website.

I would also like to point out that at the end of the story, I speak about Pinkie Pie inventing an ability called the multi-wall dodge. This was actually my original idea for a special mutator in the game and my friend [ToJ.cc]Danny_Miester was able to take my idea and make it a realty thanks to his coding and modding skills. This option is only available to play on our server and it's very fun to play with.

Doctor: Unfortunately, it made the program self aware and it tried to destroy humanity.

I do play a few other PC games and you can easily get in touch with me through steam.

All: (Gasps)

Ditzy: You play other games?

My steam name is Brian_Jacko. Please check out our website and feel free to sign up an post on the forums. Our website can be found here...

http://tojudah.com/

Doctor: So after this, will you rushing to buy Unreal Tournament?

Ditzy: Nah, I think I will just play Portal again. It seems more worth my time.

Doctor: (Nods)

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            The Doctor and Ditzy were gathered around the Hearth’s Warming Tree. Ditzy had a mug of eggnog in her hands that she was periodically sipping. The Doctor was snacking on some cookies shaped like trees that Ditzy made the other day. Both were reclining on a brown sofa.

            “Okay, all ready.” Dinky said in eagerness. She was almost bouncing on her chair. Star Shot was reclining against the wall. She pressed on a button on the console and a wrapped package was transmatted into the room in front of the tree. “This is from me to you Ditzy.”

            “I wonder what it is.” Ditzy asked.

            “Probably a transcript of ‘Darkness of Love’.” The Doctor quipped.

            “Stop that.” Ditzy scolded before returning her attention to the package. She tore it open and gasped. It was a waffle maker. “Thank you so much!” Ditzy said genuinely liking her gift. “Ponyiton. It’s a good brand too.”

            Dinky beamed. She pressed a button and another package appeared in front of the tree. “Now open your gift Doctor.”

            He trotted up to the package and carefully opened it. Inside of it was a book. ‘Of Mice and Ponies?’ He read off of the cover.

            “It’s a first edition too. I know how much you like old books.”

            The Doctor looked taken aback. “Thank you.”

            “Now it’s my turn!” Ditzy said maybe a bit too forcefully. Dinky suspected she might be a little drunk on the eggnog. She held up a package grinning ear to ear.

            The package was transmatted to the control room and Dinky quickly grabbed it. Star Shot watched curiously. Dinky opened it and inside was a ticket to a Hoofball game that was playing next week with the Canterlot Phoenixes. This was Dinky’s favorite team. Dinky hugged the ticket for a few moments before saying a quiet, “Thank you.”

            “I’m glad you like it!” Ditzy chirped. “I got you something too Star Shot.”

            Star Shot perked up at this. “Oh really?”

            Ditzy held out a package and Star Shot transmatted it to her hooves with a press of a button since Dinky was still too distracted by her ticket. She eagerly opened only to give a disappointed look when she discovered the contents.

            “Perfume?” Star Shot deadpanned. Dinky left her revelry and looked at Star Shot’s gift. It was a brand of perfume that her mother rather liked and often used.

            “It also has a fur grooming kit.” Ditzy said happily.

            “Thanks.” Star Shot said clearly not happy with her gift.

            Ditzy tilted her head. “You don’t like it?”

                   Star Shot scoffed. “Perfume’s not really my thing.” Dinky thought about it and this was certainly true. Star Shot didn’t really put much work in her appearance.

                   “I’m sorry. I’ll have to get you something else.” Ditzy said mournfully.

            “Sounds like plan. How about you Doctor? Did you get me anything?”

            “No, I don’t give gifts to villains.” The Doctor smirked.

“That’s not giving into the Hearth’s Warming spirit.” Star Shot said sarcastically.

“I don’t care.” The Doctor said simply.

            “I tried to convince him to at least give you a Hearth’s Warming card, but he won’t hear any of it.” Ditzy sighed. “So stubborn.”

            The Doctor smiled triumphantly. This didn’t surprise Dinky. Still, it would have been nice to get something from him. Dinky suddenly brightened. “Now it’s your turn to exchange gifts!”

            Ditzy got several boxes out from under the tree. “This is from me to you Doctor.”

           “Look at all of them.” Star Shot said in bewilderment. There were at least 15 boxes there. This didn’t surprise Dinky all that much. Her mother had a habit of over giving gifts during the holidays. Her mother loved giving them and Dinky figured she gave so many to the Doctor since she was unable to give anything to anypony else this year.

            This year Ditzy got the Doctor all sorts of things; a new tie that was red, a bow tie, winter socks, candies the Doctor likes, a subscription to Equestria Science Monthly, and various other miscellaneous things.

            “And finally this.” Ditzy hoofed the Doctor one final gift. The Doctor opened it.

            “It’s beautiful.” It was a fob watch, the old kind you need to wind. “Thank you Ditzy.”

            “Oh, it was nothing. “ Ditzy smiled. “I found it at an antique shop with the help of Dinky.”

           “And this from me.” The Doctor set the watch aside and handed her a card. Inside was a 70 bit Stream gift card.

            “Thank you Doctor!” Ditzy hugged him.

 “That’s it?” Star Shot said disappointed.        

   “It’s what she asked for.” The Doctor said simply.

           “Yeah, with this I can buy like 50 games!” Ditzy said happily perfectly content with her gift. She went back to sipping her eggnog.

           Star Shot shrugged. Dinky was a little disappointed. She was hopping for the gifts to be something more romantic or at least something more than what something friends would give each other. It struck Dinky just how her parent weren’t connecting like intended. She hopped after all this time they would be a little more than just friends. Ditzy thought about, and the two were more than just friends, but they were more like siblings than special someponies. She sighed deeply.  Maybe next year things would turn around. She was taken out of her revelry when Ditzy suddenly suggested that they sing Hearth’s Warming songs.

“That can wait till next year.” Dinky thought and joined in the singing perfectly content and happy to spend this Hearth’s Warming Eve with the ones she loves even if she couldn’t be with them like a daughter.

Applejack scooped up her friend's liver with her hoof and held it to the sky as she held her Flak Cannon in her other hoof. "Yee-Haw! This here is in honor of y'all, Princess Luna and Princess Celestia." Next Chapter: Episode 16 - Dax's Despair Estimated time remaining: 15 Hours, 55 Minutes