“Hey little brother, time to get up,” Vela cooed softly as she lightly poked her brother with a claw. Little Dayspring rolled over as the contact did more to tickle him than anything else. “Come on, wake up,” she lightly whispered into his ear.

Dayspring opened his eyes and looked at her, “You need my blankie?” Dayspring offered his sister his treasured blanket, for the eighth time that week.

Vela just wrapped the blanket around herself and started lightly tickling the young hippogriff with her claw, “Come on, it’s time to wake up,” she teased.

Dayspring started giggling as the claw hit all his most ticklish spots.

“Is it wise to bring him along, Starlight?” Ana asked her older sister.

Starlight turned from the playful display and whispered to her sister, “C’mon, you act like we had a choice.”

“I heard that,” Vela said as she finished tickling her younger brother, “I told you you’re either taking me with or I’m telling Twilight what you’re doing,” she said matter-of-factly.

“Yeah, but this puts Dayspring at risk.”

“We’re going to bring back Taz though,” his little voice cut through their conversation, “I want to go.”

“You heard him, end of conversation.”

“He doesn’t even know who Taz is,” Starlight groaned.

“What does that have to do with wanting to help?” Dayspring asked.

Starlight was at a loss for words at that one. That one could be so innocent and kind to put himself in danger to help someone he did not even know. It robbed her of any response she could give.

“Besides, you’re the one who insisted we do this ourselves,” Vela gestured over to Ana.

“It’s our clue and he’s our friend!” Ana practically shouted the words. She had enough of waiting for ‘her’ to bring back Taz. If Night had been serious, if she really, really wanted him back, she would have succeeded by now. The delay, this three-month wait was proof in Ana’s head that Night did not care enough to find him. Telling someone else would just lead to the same result. She wanted… she needed to find him.

Starlight’s first response was to tell Twilight, of course. Ana had insisted that they handle this personally. She called in every favor, every outstanding pinkie promise her sister owed her. Starlight was basically browbeaten into going along.

“Would you quiet down?!” Blaze yelled, “Some of us are trying to sleep.”

“It’s time to get up anyway,” Starlight stated as she walked over to the twins. They each took a bunk bed to themselves. Only Twilight’s tether kept them together. There was a time not that long ago that they would have been inseparable. That time had passed, in fact the only reason Flash was even here is that he had to come for Blaze to go; something that basically took kidnapping him to make happen.

Flash did not even fight it; he just went along, carried in Ana’s magic. The pegasus just did not care. Only Blaze seemed to care.

Blaze was the one that snuck them out of the palace. With a large amount of help from Ana who kept his brother close by, not allowing him to be hamstrung by the tether that connected the two.

Flash just rolled over and looked at the ponies that had woken him. It was his eyes that hurt the most, the deadpan expression in them; it was as if he was there, just not there. Not in any real sense anyway. When he learned of his mother’s death three months ago, the pegasus just gave up.

Years ago, Starlight was told of the time after Shining Armor’s death. His son Radiant had lived under the shadow of that sacrifice, looking for a way to overshadow his father with a noble death of his own.

In Starlight’s opinion, this was not that, this was a pony that just did not care. Flash was simply waiting for whatever death came his way, good or bad. He just wanted to be with his mom again.

Blaze was the opposite. It had been three months and he still could not stop breaking out in random crying fits. Starlight suspected it was for that very reason he was here. He was here so he could make sure no one else died, that he did not lose anyone else.

He would give his life to ensure that did not happen. She hoped it would not come to that, this should be nothing more than a retrieval mission. They had no reason to believe there was any such threat.

Although, there was still the wild card in play, no pony had seen or heard from Nighttide since Taz disappeared. That still rubbed everyone the wrong way. Starlight, Ana, and Twilight all investigated the missing young mare. Twilight pulled some records to try and locate her home. All they found was a collapsed abandoned house that was several hundred years old. Which was quite the accomplishment as the records indicated it was built fifty years ago.

The filly herself never existed. She existed, just not on any records; that made everypony worry. Nighttide had been a trusted friend of Taz. They even invited her into their home, yet she was hiding something, she was not who she appeared to be.

Ana had almost gone ballistic when she heard the news. She wanted to tear the pegasus’s feathers out one at a time. Starlight suspected that had Nighttide been in the room at that moment, that event was exactly what would have occurred. It mattered not as it changed nothing, whatever Nighttide was up to; it was far, far too late to stop it.

She was gone, most likely with Taz.

While the others lamented that fact, Starlight found some comfort in it. Sure Nighttide might not be who she claimed to be and while it was true that Ana hated her as a potential rival for Taz’s heart, it could not be denied that Nighttide did love Taz. Starlight saw it every time that pegasus would look at him.

It was love; she knew that for a fact. Starlight suspected that if Taz ever got over his crush for Aurora, he might feel the same for her too. If Nighttide was with Taz – something Starlight put at ninety percent odds – then Taz was okay. She would never let anything happen to him.

Starlight was able to take some comfort in that.

Truly, the pony she felt bad about was Ana. Her sister was only going to get her heart broken. That train was travelling at full speed off the cliff with no way to stop it or even slow it down.

Ana’s love for Taz was doomed, not because he did not like her, but because he did not like her that way. The two of them had always been friends, but that is all they would ever be, just friends. Starlight could only hope that when the day finally came for Ana to confront that reality, she would be ready for it.

“Hey guys, I think we’re about there,” Blaze stated as he looked out the window. Starlight followed her sister to the side of the cabin to verify that yes; they were in fact there. The six of them would have to move carefully now that the sun was up. They knew it would not be long until Twilight and Rainbow found out they were gone from the palace. If they wanted to do this it had to be now.

…

Two pegasi sit on top of the train watching as the six young ponies disembarked. Ice and Fire grinned at each other as their prey so easily took their bait. Of course these six were not their actual prey as they were merely bait. Bait to keep others, more powerful prey busy.

Who that would be did not matter. The heroes of Equestria had many powerful defenders. Their job was to pull a few away from what would happen that day. They knew it would be a day that would change everything.

…………………………..

Shimmering Night felt sore, worn out, dehydrated, and wonderful all at the same time. Without even opening her eyes she could smell sweat and sex in the room. She smiled at that, Ataxia and she must have had a wild night last night. Although it would be nothing compared to what she did in her dream.

Ataxia fell asleep on top of her, that was a little abnormal, but she went with it. Wrapping her hooves around the mare, Night squeezed her tighter to her breast. Had she been in a different state of mind, she might have wondered why there were two different heat sources pressed up against both of her sides. Right now, with her mind in post-dream state, she did not give it a second thought.

“Morning love,” Night said with a smile as she felt her wife’s warmth against her, earning an unconscious ‘mm…’ from the mare in her hooves for her actions. Night rubbed her hooves down her wife’s primary feathers. Enjoying the feel of them in the morning.

‘Wait… feathers?’

Sleep left her; Night opened her eyes to a sight she never in a million years expected to see. Ataxia was not on top of her, her sister was. Her sister, Empress Princess Aurora Flash was laying on top of her. Aurora was snuggled into her sticky coat like a foal to her mother’s breast. Aurora’s fur was matted to her coat, her mane looked stuck to the side of her head, and her eyes were still glued shut. To make matters worse, two small movements to either side let her know that she was not alone.

A glance to her right and left conformed it. Ataxia and Icarus were both sleeping next to her. Based on the quick glances she got of them they were in the same state that Aurora was in. That could only mean one thing, one thing she really, really did not want to be true.

Night shut her eyes and opened them again; she repeated this action ten times. Hoping, praying that the vision would change, that the feeling of her well-used pussy, the sight of her sister sleeping on top of her, and her wife and brother-in-law on either side of her meant something other than what she knew it meant.

The dream came back, save it was anything but a dream. She had sex with all three of them last night. They rode her to orgasm after orgasm time and again. She had been licked and fucked by all three of them at one point in time or another.

Those memories made her disgusted and aroused in equal measure. She felt so dirty and so turned on all at the same time. Unfortunately, the former emotion won out.

“Get of me!” Night shouted as her magic took over, she teleported all three bodies off her and three hooves up in the air. They all landed with loud thuds as their bodies hit the ground.

“What the hell?” Ataxia rubbed her head.

“Night, Ataxia, what are you two…” Aurora looked around; her eyes went wide as the memories came back.

Icarus did not say a word, he knew better than to say anything at this point in time. Like his wife, his memories returned a few seconds after waking up; however, he also knew that saying something right now would only put his neck or something slightly more valuable out there to be chopped off.

When one gets drunk, their inhibitions are lowered. Things that seem like a good idea at the time are taken at face value. No regard for the consequences is made at the time. This should not be taken to mean that you do not know there are consequences, just that you do not care at that time that there are consequences. There is a saving grace though; you tend not to remember every detail of what you did. The alcohol obscures some of your memories.

This was not the case for these four. They remembered everything.

“Aurora, why did you…” Night tried to say something, anything that resembled something intelligent that did not imply what they did last night, what she did last night, having sex with her older sister.

“Night, I… I…” Aurora was equally lost for words. She had fucked her sister, her husband had fucked her sister, and it was all their doing.

“Aurora, you… you and Icarus,” Night pressed her hoof to her lower torso, feeling the slight pain of so much usage from her cooter. The contact was a mistake, while Aurora and Ataxia had given her a ‘bath’ after Icarus came on her, they did not get every spot. Her fur was matted a few inches above her slit. A left over ‘gift’ she would have to deal with.

Icarus suddenly felt very exposed without his spear. Night was a singular foe, if she took offence or made to get revenge, he would be in a world of danger. He glanced over to where it lay; sadly his spear’s location was on the other side of the room, next to Night. With his fight or flight instinct in full gear, he made to fly, or in this case, hide. He did the one thing he never thought he would do in his entire life; he hid behind his wife.

“If you three are done with this vocabulary lesson, let’s get something to eat,” Ataxia said with a yawn as she made for the kitchen.

Aurora and Night glared at her, she merely shrugged, “Well if you two are not hungry, how about you, Icarus?”

Icarus wished more than anything that his name was not spoken right then. However, the noise coming from his wife’s stomach answered the question for him, “Sure,” Aurora said as she moved to the kitchen with her husband in tow.

Night was again dumbfounded, “What. I. You can’t. I. Wait.”

“Night. Food. Yes or no?” Ataxia stated like it was just another day. It was almost as if Ataxia was saying: ‘That was a great family orgy last night, who’s hungry?’

In retrospect, Night figured that was EXACTLY what Ataxia was saying. Night hung her head when her stomach answered the question for her. She was indeed sticky, sweaty, disgusted with herself, and a little aroused by the memories. However, she was also hungry. It just took Ataxia’s mention of food for the last part to kick in.

They all ate in silence; only Ataxia would actually look at anypony or griffin as the case may be and none of them would meet her gaze for long. Finally she had enough, “Hey, relax alright!”

Night glared at her, “Ataxia, do you have any idea what we did?!”

“Duh, I was there, remember?”

“We all had sex together!”

“So?”

Night’s eyes went wide. She had no reply to that so she just glared daggers at her wife instead.

Ataxia rolled her eyes, “Alright, let’s break this down to its most simplistic. All four of us are adults. None of us were forced to do it against our will, what’s so wrong with last night?”

“Speak for yourself,” Night mumbled under her breath.

Ataxia rolled her eyes at that, “Night you were enjoying yourself more than any of us last night. I don’t want to hear it from you. You could ‘a stopped it any time you wanted too.”

“No I couldn’t! He was giving me a horn job!” Night shouted as she pointed a hoof at Icarus. As soon as the words left her mouth she blushed and tried to take them back with her hooves. She was far, far too late to achieve that feat.

Icarus looked down at his food at that. He really hated being the center of attention in all of this.

Ataxia had never heard anything hotter in all her life, she decided to push it further, “Night, you’re an alicorn for Luna’s sake, are you telling me you couldn’t push a single griffin off your horn long enough to do magic?”

“Well… I…”

“Thought so,” Ataxia said with a smirk, “Of course that still leaves one question, what the hell happened with you two?” Ataxia looked at Aurora and Icarus at that question.

“I just wanted to cheer up my sister,” Aurora practically mumbled the words.

“And your idea of cheering me up is to fuck my brains out?” Night looked at her, dumbfounded.

“I don’t know why, it seemed almost like ‘why not?’ Like it was just natural for me to want to you make you feel better,” Aurora said honestly, “Almost like there was no reason not to.”

“When she mentioned the idea to me, I thought the same. It just seemed like a good idea at the time with no down side,” Icarus added, thinking it was safe to talk now.

It was not.

“No down side?! You stick your dick in my wife and I, and you think there’s no downside!” Night shouted.

Ataxia really, really wished she had a recorder to catch her wife’s comments. Then it dawned on her, ‘Dayspring’s old recording spell!’ She cast the spell and egged the conversation on, “He even fucked me in the ass.”

Night glared at Ataxia, “Yeah, but that’s just you,” she turned back to Icarus, “Wait, you fucked me afterwards!”

“I licked him clean before…” Aurora almost gagged as she realized what that meant.

If there were a picture in the dictionary next to the phrase shit-eating grin, it would be of Ataxia’s face at that moment. Which was ironic as it would literally apply more to Aurora then her; however, this was getting out of hoof and quickly.

“Guys, enough!” Ataxia shouted. Both Aurora and Night turned to look at her, Icarus just wanted to be anywhere else right that second.

“And you!” Night started in on her wife, “What was your excuse in all of this?!”

“My excuse? Have you met me?” Ataxia just glared at Night. Just this one time Night looked away. It was a stupid thing to say.

Night thought with a groan, ‘Of course she’d just jump in on something like this’.

“What’s done is done, even if we wish we could take back some of what was done,” Aurora said with a gag, “We can’t change the past. All we can do is decide here and now what we will do in the future.”

“How are you so cool with it?” Night asked. She did not feel like her sister at all.

“Once you’ve been in a bukkake, something like this is not that big a deal,” Aurora said before blushing. She had never meant to tell anyone that.

Night’s eyes went wide, Icarus almost choked, and Ataxia looked like she wanted to give her a high five, “Aurora, you dog.”

“Pinkie promise me now that none of you will speak a word of that to anyone!” Aurora shouted.

“How about we promise each other that nothing said or done here today will ever make it out outside these four walls,” Night added. Two nodding muzzles singled their agreement, “Ataxia, you promise?”

Ataxia sighed, “Fine, only if Aurora promises to eventually tell me that story.”

“Why do you want to hear a story of my sister covered in cum?” Night asked before she remembered just whom she was talking to, “Never mind, I already know the answer.”

“Cross my heart and hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye,” all four of them said at the same time.

“So, are we all good?” Ataxia asked hopefully.

“I don’t know about good,” Night looked around, blushing as her gaze met her sister’s, “I think we can put this behind us though.”

“Speaking of behind,” Ataxia said, she could not-not poke the bear on this one, “I need a shower, who’s up for one?”

“We all need a shower, INDIVIDUAL showers,” Night started with a snarl as she snapped the tethers connecting the pairs together, eliminating any hope of anything else happening today.

Ataxia got up and grunted something along the lines of ‘You’re no fun’ as she made for the upstairs bedroom.

When Night heard the shower come on, she turned to Icarus. “There’s another shower downstairs you can make use of.”

The griffin left without issue, he could read the writing on the wall clear as day. The sisters needed to talk.

“Ok, it’s just us,” Aurora said as her hearing picked up the second showerhead turning on.

“Rainbow and Twilight can never know about this!” Night pleaded with her.

“That was our arrangement.”

“They can never, never know.”

“Night, what are you getting at?”

“Icarus didn’t use protection.”

“It wasn’t high on our list of priorities last night.”

“I’m in heat.”

Aurora’s jaw hit the table as the realization kicked in. Icarus may not have cum in her, but she could still get pregnant. There was more than enough pre-cum released during sex to achieve that result. Part of her had wondered why Night went along with it so easy. It must have been early in her cycle too for no one to notice before now.

“Are you?”

“I don’t know; it’s too early to tell.”

Her worry made sense, Rainbow and Twilight could never know, but how would they explain it if Night gave birth to a hippogriff? That would be a pretty big giveaway. They knew the ‘orgy’ excuse did not actually work the first time, never mind now that it was kind ‘a true.

“You should tell Ataxia,” Aurora said with all seriousness.

“How can I-”

“Night, your wife loves you, she loves everything about you. She won’t care. You know what she told me last night when I asked her if she was okay with you getting fucked by Icarus? She told me that, to her, the best thing is the look of ecstasy on your face when you cum.”

“How about you?” Night cut off her sister’s platitudes, “How do you feel knowing your husband may have fathered another foal with your sister?”

Aurora looked down at the table at that. She thought about it, really thought about it, “Well, if it had to be with somepony else, I could think of worse circumstances. Although we might be over thinking things here; trust me, if it were easy for a griffin to knock up a pony I’d have like fifty foals by now.”

“it doesn’t take much?”

“Not often. I’ve been told we’ve gotten lucky, in almost twenty years I’ve been knocked up three times. So maybe you don’t have anything to worry about.”

“Yeah, and maybe pigs will fly. You forget our parents are two mares that had four kids of their own. I’ll be lucky to not have twins,” Night said as she buried her head in her hooves, crying.

Aurora got up, groaning a little as her insides adjusted to the sudden movement. She was sticky and sweaty, but none of that mattered to her. She flew over and sat next to her sister; wrapping her up in a hug as she let her cry out into her chest. “It’s ok,” Aurora cooed softly, “Even if you are pregnant, we’ll deal with it together.”

“Really?” Night sniffled.

“Hey,” Aurora raised her muzzle so she could look her sister in the eye, “You’re my little sister; whatever may happen, that will never change,” she lightly brushed a rogue hair away from Night’s face

Both sisters smiled at each other before a voice interrupted, “You two gonna kiss and makeup?” Ataxia asked, hopefully.

Night chucked a plate at her wife. Ataxia dodged the first one but not the second. She ended up with a plate full of pancake syrup in her mane, “Night! Dammit, now I gotta take another shower.”

“I’ll join you,” Night said with one final smile at her sister.

“Really?” Ataxia asked.

“Yeah, I gotta tell you something anyway.”

Aurora watched them go upstairs, “You really do have one great wife there Night. Treat her good,” she said to nopony in particular before her hoof caught in a portion of her matted fur. That made her think of the other shower in this ‘tent’. Or more specifically, the other occupant in the tent.

“Oh, Iccccaaarrrruuussss,” Aurora called out in a sing-song voice as she went to join her husband in the shower. It did not matter that it was not an oversize shower; they would make it work.

Aurora would be the first pony to say things had not gone to plan, but she would not say things went bad. Their visit had been rather fun after all, eventful, but fun.

If Aurora was being honest with herself, she would not be opposed to doing it again someday. She even suspected that Night might be open to it too, albeit with protection this time around.

……………………………….

Twilight was surprised to see a griffin and a pegasus flying towards the palace when she raised the sun, “Hey Rainbow, Aurora and Icarus are back!”

“Already? I’d figured they’d spend a little longer than that with Night,” Rainbow flew up to get a better look, sure enough Icarus and Aurora were returning.

She flew out and guided the two back in, not so much because they might get lost, but simply so she could bug her daughter that much longer, “So… how’s Night? You four have a fun time? Did ya, did ya?”

Aurora grounded inwardly, it was almost as if she knew. When she landed in the palace, she finally answered, “Well, it was eventful. I’ll say that much.”

Icarus smiled at that, but said nothing. He left the three mares to catch up as he went to check on his kids. Twilight noted with some dismay that their tether was no longer connected. However, she did not say anything of it. Aurora would fill them in on what had happened with that during her conversation, whether she wanted to or not.

When Icarus turned the corner he noted with some dismay that he was being followed. It meant someone was either trying something against him, or one of the Shadow Knights was being sloppy. With the amount of training he put them through he hoped for the former.

After three more steps, he knew it to be the latter. No one would be this obvious if they were really trying something. He closed his eyes and sighed inwardly, “You can come out now.”

When he opened his eyes a pitch-black griffin was standing in front of him, “I know you’re trained better than that,” Icarus said with a snarl.

“Indeed, emperor. I’ve only revealed myself to give you notice about something that happened last night.”

“You saw that,” Icarus suddenly regretted his decision to throw privacy to the wind. He wrote it off, it was too late now, “What about it?”

“There was a message left in the dirt after you were finished.”

“A message?”

“Three words emperor, I erased them just in case it was part of a spell, but you should know what they said.”

“And?”

“Key of Ages.”

“Thank you, you may go,” in the blink of an eye, the Shadow Knight was gone back into his enteral watch over the protection of the royal family. Icarus paused as he thought about those three words. ‘I know I’ve heard of the Key of Ages before, but where?’

He shook his head and went back to the smartest mare he knew, “Hey Twilight!” Icarus called out from across the room. The alicorn looked away from her daughter and to the griffin.

“Yes, Icarus?”

He flew the rest of the way as to not shout out the next part, “Have you heard of the ‘Key of Ages’ before?”

“Key of Ages?” Twilight thought about it, “It’s a legendary key said to open the gateway to the sands of time. Why do you ask?” When she started dealing with Gods, Twilight took to learning everything she could about the ancient times. What was the real trick was sifting through what was a real legend or what was fiction.

“My guards just told me it was left in the ground outside our tent last night.”

Aurora’s eyes got wide at that. She shook her head as to tell her husband not to go there. Icarus just nodded his understanding not to go into ‘that’ event. However, while Rainbow noticed that, it was Twilight’s expression that really got her worried, “Twi,” Rainbow asked, “What do the Sands do?”

“Well, and this is just the legends mind you, it’s the physical representation of time. If you could influence the sands you can control time,” her eyes got wide, “You don’t think?”

Icarus shook his head, “I honestly don’t know. You know everything I do.”

“Wait, what guards?” Aurora asked.

Icarus looked at her, “I’ll tell you about them later.”

“If somepony left this hint for us… wait, it was left in the dirt?” Rainbow asked the emperor.

“Yes, the guards said they found it after we fell asleep.”

“The guards watched us last night?!” Aurora’s eyes got wider.

“They wouldn’t be much good as guards if they didn’t,” Icarus said matter-of-factly.

“What happened last night?” Rainbow asked.

“Nothing!” Icarus and Aurora said at the same time. Rainbow grinned at that, but said nothing.

“Wait, could it have been Taz?” Twilight asked.

“What do you mean?” Rainbow questioned.

“You said it was undiscovered until it was already left?” Icarus nodded at Twilight’s question, “Only Taz can pass undiscovered like that. What if… what if he found out something’s going on. What if he left that message for us?”

“Maybe that’s where he is?” Aurora asked.

“Where is the key?”

“That’s the thing, Icarus. The key is in… if the legends are true, it’s in a place that doesn’t exist anymore: Tartarus.”

“Wait… does it?” Rainbow asked.

“What do you mean, Rainbow?” Twilight asked.

“We know Tartarus was killed, the body he used was killed. What happened to the actual place? I always kinda wanted to know just where the escapes were coming from. Were they all simply teleported out of Tartarus when he died, or where they escaping from it? What if his death just threw open the doors?”

“If that’s true, Dash, than the key still exists.”

“Wait, are you two suggesting that we trek through Hades to get to a place that may or may not still exist to get to a key that may or may not even be there to keep it from someone that may or may not want it?” Aurora asked.

“Well, when you put it like that,” Rainbow rolled her eyes.

“If there’s a chance that Taz is involved, and he left us this message, we’ll go,” Twilight spoke with conviction. It had been three months; she wanted her son back.

“Hey Twilight, have you seen the kids?!” Cadance shouted from across the room. Twilight, Rainbow, Icarus, and Aurora all turned to look at the newcomers.

“What do you mean?” Icarus said with a knout in his stomach. This was news he did not want right now.

“We went to check on the twins. Flash is not in his room, neither is Blaze or any of the others,” Radiant said.

“They haven’t been asleep either,” Luna teleported into the room, “I’ve looked all over, apparently they purchased a train ticket to the Crystal Empire last night.

“Horseapples, we don’t need this right now,” Rainbow said.

“We’ll go get them. They’ve got to have a reason why they left like that,” Aurora said as she looked at Icarus, he just nodded back. She had a sickening feeling that her daughter was up to something.

“Everyone else, we may have a clue as to where Taz is. I won’t ask you to come with me bu-”

“You don’t have to ask us to come with, Twilight. We’re going,” Cadance said with a smile. Radiant and Luna nodded in agreement.

“The five of us will go see about this key,” Rainbow said.

“Seven,” Twilight corrected.

“Seven?”

Twilight nodded, “Let’s go pick up Night and Ataxia too. We’ll do this as a family.”

Twilight teleported the five of them to her youngest daughter’s location while Icarus and Aurora took flight to the Crystal Empire. They did not know what they were getting into but for the first time in three months, they had something resembling a plan.

Sadly, no plan survives contact with the enemy. It was a lesson they have learned the hard way over the years.

Author's Notes:

Reality always comes crashing down in the end. The only real question is how you let it affect you afterwords.