Hark Mountain and the valley below it were obscured by black smoke. Just looking at it made Twilight’s eyes water. There was no way anything in the valley could be alive.

“I don’t believe it,” Applejack said. “My own cousins.”

“I don’t believe it either,” Twilight said. “This isn’t right. Princess Celestia wouldn’t let this happen.”

“She did say she was busy preparing for the Gala,” Rainbow Dash said.

“It’s a matter of incentives,” Twilight said. “Ponies aren’t inert. Once the Appleloosans saw the dragon and the black smoke coming from the mountain, they would have packed up and headed out. They wouldn’t have stayed around dying because no pony thought to walk away. We’ve seen no sign of a group of ponies coming out of Appleloosa, which means they’re still there, and they’re still there only if they’re still alive. Ergo, they’re still alive. QED.”

“I’ll buy twenty shares,” Rainbow Dash said instinctively.

Twilight summoned a translucent lavender 2-sphere around them, even the Cerberus. “This will protect us from the smoke. Come on, everypony.”

Walking to Appleloosa through the black smoke was like walking through hell on a foggy day. Then the smoke turned into light, and they were standing in Appleloosa.

Twilight banished the 2-sphere and looked around. Despite the smoke that was thick enough to block the sunlight, the town was brightly lit by lamps along the streets. At the perimeter of the town were dozens of tiny creatures that looked like ponies but with long curvy antennas and pale wings so thin they were translucent and so strong a single flap blew back the smoke in front of them. Together they held the blackness back.

Breezies. Rare magical creatures that resembled a better class of parasprite. Twilight didn’t know what they were doing in Appleloosa helping ponies.

“Howdy! And welcome to AH-PAH-LOOSA!”

“Howdy, Braeburn,” Applejack said while Twilight held a shaking hoof to her chest. She gave her cousin a hug. “Almost thought you folks were goners for a minute. Glad to see you’re still as noisy as a frightened rattlesnake.”

“I’m happier than a coral snake in cool mud to see you again, cousin Applejack,” Braeburn said. “What brings you down to AH-PAH-LOOSA?” Twilight jumped again. “Weather ain’t so good right now.”

“We’re here to slay that dragon for you,” Applejack said, gesturing at her friends and the Cerberus. “Brought some backup.”

Braeburn, whom Twilight sincerely hated, reared back on his hind legs and whinnied. “Yeehaw! That dragon’s gonna be deader than a buffalo what woke up on the wrong side of a coral snake.”

“About the buffalo,” Twilight said quickly, before Braeburn could…anything. “What happened between the ponies and the buffaloes here? We ran into them earlier and they seemed upset with you all.”

Braeburn pulled his hat down, seeming cross. “Those buffaloes have been complaining ever since we got here. They don’t even live here, but they say the land is theirs.”

“They’re nomadic.”

“All I know is they’re never around, and when they do show up it’s just to complain.”

“How’s the apple orchard?” Applejack said.

“It’s doing better than a coral snake that found a nice boot to sleep in. That tree of yours is still standing. Nothing the buffaloes could do about that.”

“What do you mean?” Twilight said.

“I’m hungry,” Rainbow Dash said.

“I want a bath,” Rarity said.

“Where’re my manners?” Braeburn doffed his hat. “Pardon me, ladies. If you follow me I can give you the grand tour of AH-PAH-MMPH!”

Twilight released the magical grip she had on his lips. “Stop that.”

Rarity hardly went a day without a stallion trying to charm her, and the Western variant was no more effective. “A bath, if you please. Wherever you have clean water.” Braeburn pointed her to the bathhouse and Rainbow Dash, Pinkie Pie, and Fluttershy to the saloon.

“Wait!” Twilight said. “I haven’t gotten all the exposition yet.”

Rarity patted her on the shoulder. “Twilight, be reasonable. If the story can’t move until you have your exposition, then we have all the time in the world to relax.”

The leathery rustle of a tail sliding across the ground.

“What about the smoke?”

“Those delightful little horse-parasprites are taking care of it.”

“I want to know about them too—“

The ponies dispersed, leaving Braeburn, Applejack, Twilight, and the Cerberus standing in the middle of the dusty street.

“The buffaloes said they attacked,” Spike said.

“They sure did,” Braeburn said. “Lucky us that we had Sheriff Silverstar, or we’d be deader than a coral snake on the wrong end of a pony’s boot.”

“I think we need to talk with this Sheriff Silverstar,” Twilight said.

Sheriff Silverstar dressed like he had fallen into a clothes factory and had kicked and bitten his way out. He wore a red bandana and a black hat. He had what Twilight thought was a hairy caterpillar on his face that turned out to be a kind of Western fashion called a mustache, and a blue vest with a big silver star pinned to the chest.

“What Element is that?” Twilight said.

Sheriff Silverstar thumped the, um, silver star proudly. “This is my pi gun. It’s how I protect Appleloosa from those buffaloes.”

“You fight buffaloes by shooting pies at them?” Twilight said skeptically. “Somehow I don’t think that would stop a raging stampede.

“You didn’t hear me right. This is a pi gun.”

“It still sounds the same.”

“He means the number,” Applejack said. “No pony draws as fast or shoots as straight as Sheriff Silverstar.”

“You fight buffaloes with irrational numbers?”

“Is there a better way?” Sheriff Silverstar adjusted his hat. “Buffaloes are simple creatures. They can’t handle the idea of a number that goes on forever. Makes their heads spin, it does, and they get confused and forget what they were doing.”

“Makes more sense than using apple pies as a weapon,” Twilight said.

“The ones Apple Bloom burns hit pretty hard,” Applejack said.

“How is that bright-eyed little filly, anyway?”

“She’s healthier than a rattlesnake in July—“

“No Western hospitality and banter,” Twilight said. “I want my exposition. Where did the Breezies come from? Why are they helping to keep the smoke at bay?”

“One of the Chief Executive Economists of those newfangled Daughter Banks sent ‘em.” Sheriff Silverstar reached into the pocket of his vest and dug out a bulging envelope. “The Breezies came carrying this letter. It’s addressed to you.”

Twilight opened the envelope. A ten-page letter and a postcard with a picture of a smiling Unicorn with a chartreuse coat and a Breezie floating by her shoulder was inside. The postcard read, “Greetings from Whinnysota!” A signature was scrawled along the top.

The letter began like this:

Dear Compass-Butt,

How are you, Twilight? It’s been a year since we all left Canterlot to run our own Daughter banks—except Trixie, poor thing, she’s just Vice Chief Executive Economist in the Crystal Empire. Then again, working with Princess Cadance must be positively thrilling.

Twilight grimaced at the mention of two of her least-favorite ponies.

Oh, don’t make that face, Twinkie. Princess Cadance is the second-best econopony in the world, after all, after Princess Celestia, of course. Quit dousing for cutie marks.

Get that stick out of your butt, Twilight translated.

Anyway, I suppose you’ve noticed my Breezies by now. Adorable things, aren’t they? Don’t be fooled by their looks; they’re quite powerful. I met them in the course of saving the world from economic catastrophe about ten months ago. I befriended them, naturally, and mastered them. Now they do my bidding. Isn’t having pets great? I can see why you’re so attached to that fire-breathing postal service of yours.

Twilight angled the letter away from Spike, who was trying to read over her shoulder.

When I saw the smoke coming from Hark Mountain, I knew trouble was ahoof. Princess Celestia sent me a letter explaining the situation of the Appleloosans, and at once I sent my Breezies to protect them. Ain’t I just peachy? Ooh, no, the Appleloosans, would say “appley,” wouldn’t they? Do ask one for me.

Anyway, I want my Breezies back, so get rid of that dragon already! I look so much more majestic when I can fly around Whinnysota. An econopony must be looked up to!

Twilight turned the page. What followed was nine pages of gossip, rumors, and speculation about what their Sisters were up to. There was barely anything about Trixie, though. Twilight skimmed it quickly and resolved to peruse it later.

I won’t say this is all I know, Twilight, but it’s all I’m telling. Don’t pout! You’ll see all of us again at the Grand Galloping Gala. I can’t wait to hear how you’ve been keeping busy in Ponyville. You must be bored out of your mind! Can those rubes even read?

Smooches,

Gamma Glisten

“Who’s it from?” Spike said.

“Gamma.”

“Oh. Have they chased her out of Whinnysota yet?”

“Ha ha.”

“Did she say anything about your other Sisters?”

“You have sisters?” Braeburn said. “Introduce me to mmph!”

Applejack chuckled. “Braeburn, if you don’t learn to read a pony’s face, you’re going to get yourself a righteous bucking one of these days.”

“What do you mean?” Twilight said.

“Sugarcube, you got a look on your face like you just took a bite of what you thought was apple fritters, but it was actually a lemon tart.”

“Let’s just focus,” Twilight said. “Look, Sheriff, dragons are beasts of externalities. They’re very dangerous, and—“

“Dangerous?” Sheriff Silverstar looked at Spike. “So why’d you bring one of them externalithings here?”

Twilight colored. “Don’t talk about Spike that way!”

“Shouldn’t I? You just did.”

“You did,” Applejack admitted.

Braeburn nodded. “You dmmph!”

“I did no such thing,” Twilight said. “Obviously I meant all dragons except for Spike. That goes without saying. Anyway, dragons—Spike excepted—are beasts of externalities. They feed off of strife and misunderstandings. It’s vital that you do your best to learn about and empathize with the buffaloes.”

“Did you tell them this too?”

“Of—” course not, they’re buffaloes. “I didn’t get a chance to.”

Sheriff Silverstar touched his pi gun. “Well, if they show up, I reckon I can show them some understanding.”

Twilight sighed. This wasn’t working. She just wanted to hit these ponies over the head with an economics textbook.

The dragon Niddhog appeared through the smoke. He stopped hard, blasting the air forward in front of him. Breezies scattered, and the smoke rolled in.

Part of Twilight struggled to process what she was seeing. There was a great lizard flapping in the air where there hadn’t been one before, and fire was coming out of his mouth, scorching the tops of wooden buildings—the saloon, the bathhouse—

“Get the ponies out of there!” Applejack said to the Cerberus. The Cerberus rushed off.

This wasn’t right, wasn’t fair. The monster couldn’t just show up right when they had only reached the starting point! The dragon wasn’t allowed to have his own plans—it was too sudden, too undramatic—

The rest of Twilight’s brain recognized the oversized salamander that had destroyed her library.

“I AM GOING TO EVISCERATE YOU!”

Twilight took the derivative of her position function, giving her instantaneous velocity. She then took the integral, turning her velocity into a position plus an arbitrary constant. She chose the dragon’s belly and appeared there in a lavender flash.[1]

[1]A laymare would call it teleportation. The only real magic was how the energy came out of nowhere….

Twilight didn’t think she could penetrate the dragon’s belly with her horn. But she didn’t see any reason why she couldn’t teleport her horn into the dragon’s belly.

The dragon howled in pain, and so did Twilight. The pressure on her horn was immense, searing into her mind, and the dragon thrashed, whipping her about. Twilight felt something in her neck tear.

I am Twilight Sparkle I am not Twilight Sparkle

The contradiction ripped through her and pounded into her horn-point. Twilight held it for an excruciating half-second while the dragon hurled her about so fast her vision turned grey and her horn itself felt like it might break.

“PRINCIPLE OF EXPLOSION!”

The magical contradiction bubbling out of her horn exploded.

Twilight was ripped free of the screeching dragon. She fell with wisps of fire and thick drops of rainbow blood. Her shoulder hit something softer than the ground, and she heard Applejack groan in pain.

“What’re you thinking, attacking it by yourself?” Applejack said as she helped Twilight stand. “And why’re you calling your attacks?”

“Makes them stronger.” Twilight tried to straighten her neck and found that her neck considered that a very disagreeable notion. Her body throbbed oddly, the aftereffect of a magical contradiction.

The dragon’s tail whipped along a row of houses, blowing through the wood like it was paper. The hole in his belly, dripping rainbow blood and wisps of flame, was no thicker than Twilight’s horn. Instead of breathing fire, the dragon dove toward them, his hot mouth agape, each huge, sharp fang on display.

“Pi Beam!” cried Sheriff Silverstar. A beam of silver light the shape and size of the star pinned to his chest burst out and struck the dragon in the mouth, who howled. Crashing, his great scaly legs slapped against the ground so hard Twilight’s own hoofs were momentarily lifted off. Sheriff Silverstar dived out of the way just before the dragon’s snapping jaws could swallow him whole.

“Why’re you calling your attacks too?” Applejack shouted. “Oh, for crying out loud!” She dashed toward the dragon, turned on a dime, stood on her forelegs, and—“APPLE BUCK!” Her hind legs bounced off the dragon’s scales. “Ow, ow, shouldn’t have done that—“

The dragon backhanded Applejack through a wall.

“Applejack!” Twilight screamed. She summoned a vector—she need a clear shot, in the eye or down his throat.

The Cerberus, growling like only a giant three-headed dog can, burst out from behind a burning building, spitting out a shocked-looking pony onto the ground, not ungently. She crashed into the dragon, which had only just managed to rear up, and all three mouths bit on Niddhog’s long neck.

Yes!

The thick muscles on the Cerberus’s three necks strained for an agonizing second too long. The dragon, a leisurely look on his face, ripped into the Cerberus’s chest much like a cat with a new piece of furniture to destroy. The Cerberus’s mouths never stopped biting until the dragon pulled the Cerberus’s jaws apart one by one with his claws and pushed the great beast over. She crashed to the ground, blood spilling out of her chest like a fire hydrant. One glassy eye rolled toward Twilight.

No no no this isn’t happening

The dragon looked at her, snorted, and flapped his wings once, sending Sheriff Silverstar tumbling away and taking to the smokey air. He took a deep breath. Twilight drew a 2-sphere she didn’t believe would really protect her from the flame. Hellfire poured out of the sky with a gaseous scream.

The jet of flames was met by the shimmering Breezies, like guardian angels, whose combined gust of air splayed the fire out like it had run into an invisible plate. Niddhog swiped at them. The Breezies twisted and dodged, and with another coordinated gust of air they hit the back of his hand, sending him tumbling over. He crashed onto the ground and pulled himself up, snarling, and saw Pinkie Pie, not twenty paces from him. She held up the pot with Bloomberg in it like she was holding a bomb.

Niddhog seemed to sense where the sapling had come from. He didn’t attack but swayed his long neck, watching like a cat. The plant was clearly eating the smoke, making no pretense as it stretched its branches to wherever the smoke was thickest. Wherever the leaves were, the smoke soon disappeared, sucked inside the sapling from the Everfree Forest.

Pinkie Pie walked forward, holding Bloomberg. “I swear,” she said, her voice trembling with rage Twilight had never seen in her before, “on my reputation as CEO of Sugarcube Corner that I will destroy you utterly. I will leave not even a trace of your existence, not even what semblance of life I granted to Mr. Landbiscuit and my other competitors, if you do not get out of here. You are going to leave, and leave now.” She held up the pot containing Bloomberg like she intended to smash it on the ground.

“Pinkie, no!” Twilight cried.

The dragon took to the skies, and with a single flap of his wings he disappeared to the southeast beyond the thick cloud of smoke. The Breezies immediately set to work blowing the smoke back out of Appleloosa.

Ponies were in the street, shouting and crowding around the fallen Cerberus. Fluttershy, Rarity, and Rainbow Dash ran over.

“What happened?” Rarity said, looking aghast at the Cerberus. She was being careful not to get any blood on her hoofs. Fluttershy took one look at the wretched thing and kept walking.

“Dragon,” Twilight grunted. “Fluttershy—“

“Hold your neck still,” Fluttershy commanded immediately. “Lie down on the ground.”

“Applejack got punched through a wall.”

“Where’d the dragon go?” Rainbow Dash said.

Fluttershy found Applejack. Twilight followed her inside. Applejack’s eyes were open, and she was breathing, but she was clearly in pain.

“What’s wrong with her?” Twilight asked. “Can you fix it?”

“She has a broken right.”

“A broken right what?”

“Her right. It’s broken.”

“What about the Cerberus?”

“I don’t have anything that can stop that much bleeding. Don’t move your neck!”

Twilight stumbled outside, where Braeburn was doing something to manage the chaos and direct ponies to put out the fires.

“Where’d the dragon go?” Rainbow Dash said.

Twilight remembered. She saw the solution, and the problem.

“In the direction of the buffalo camp,” she said.

Rainbow Dash was in the air and almost to the wall of smoke.

Twilight shouted after her, “Get Little Strongheart!” Next Chapter: The Game Estimated time remaining: 1 Hour, 18 Minutes