My name’s Emeris Fillson, at one point I was human, but… well… I’ve been a lot of things. Monster, prey, beast, umbralkin, demigod, something straight out of bad fanfiction, and now a unicorn. A brightly colored pony unicorn. Yeah, it’s been that kind of life.

But it’s like what my family taught me: ‘It’s not what you are, but what you do.’ Though I’m pretty sure they’d never taken the sorts of things I’ve been into account… Perhaps something like: ‘It’s how you play with the hand you’re dealt that shows the real you’ or something like that. But, I mean, it’s not like a whole lot’s happened since I’ve arrived here…

… okay, that’s a lie, quite a few things have happened, but they’re not really important.

…

Alright, a lot of them were important too, but they’re not important right now, okay?

Because right now I’m trying to keep my friend from driving herself insane… well, even more insane.

“Oh I’m going to need more quills, can’t ever have enough quills–”

“Twilight,” I said even as the rest of the girls and I followed Twilight’s frantic rushing back and forth, our heads moving in amusing synchronization.

“–and paper! Have to have enough paper to show my work! It wouldn’t do to come in without enough paper–”

“Twilight dear…” it was Rarity that spoke up this time as our eyes followed Twilight on her run back to the other side of the library. The fashionista sounding just a bit hopeful that she’d get through to our friend… just a bit though. We all knew better by this point.

My fellow unicorn went unheard as Twilight rushed around, the seven of us sharing a sigh.

“Ah don’t think she’s listenin’,” Applejack pointed out.

“Me either,” I muttered. And as amusing as it was to watch this, she was working herself into a tizzy and I couldn’t really just stand by while she did, “Twilight, it’s just a test.” Spike immediately scrambled off of my back.

Twilight froze in place briefly before wheeling on me, eyes frantic, “Just… a test?!” I stood my ground as she approached, idly noting that the rest of our friends took a synchronized step away from me as the smaller unicorn bore down on me, “Just a test?! Princess Celestia calls us both in, wanting to give you a mission and me an exam and you’re trying to tell me to calm down because it’s just a test?!”

…

What the heck, you only live once.

“Yes.”

I could practically see her train of thought hit a cow, derail, and slam into the countryside. It was a very eloquent look. It was looks like that that were the reason I loved giving blunt answers like that.

Then Twilight grit her teeth and started vibrating, I could practically hear the kettle boiling over. Shields up! Go to red alert! All hands to battle stations!

As my friend let out a scream of frustration and incoherent rage, I lit my horn.

Rarity hummed softly to herself as she brushed Twilight’s mane, occasionally pausing to spray some water on the slightly singed hair before returning to her brushing, straightening out the tangled mess. Amusingly, the lavender unicorn was still grumbling under her breath about the magic bottle I’d created around her to contain the magical outburst.

Mind you, I hadn’t fared a whole lot better, I was kinda surprised I still had my eyebrows since Twilight’s greater power had popped the created false-mage-steel like a bubble. Thankfully, my short brown mane was already a swept back mess, now it was just kinda singed and bit spiky too, so not much of a difference. Still, I’d managed to contain the worst of Twilight’s ‘little’ explosion.

“Twilight, dear, you must sit still, I can’t fix your mane very well with you fidgeting like that,” the fashionista admonished her friend.

“But Rarity!” she whined with all the elegance and grace available to her, shifting around the book in front of her, “I have to study! It’s an exam from the princess!”

Applejack and I shared a glance before rolling our eyes in unison. Of course Twilight would focus on the exam part, not the part where the Elements of Harmony plus myself had been called to Canterlot for reasons (aside from the test) currently unknown..

There were times where I could hardly believe that I’d only been able to talk to ponies in any meaningful way for less than three months now. Before that had been… nevermind. Just fuck that noise. That was in the past and it was staying there.

“But you can’t meet the princess with your mane in such a state!” Rarity exclaimed, the noise enough to make the sleeping pegasus on my back snort and shift position.

“But– study!”

The eight of us were packed into a train car room, whatever the technical term was. Applejack, Pinkie, Dash and myself on one side, Fluttershy, Rarity, Twilight and Spike on the other. While the other side was rather well organized, what with Fluttershy sitting demurely on the cushion and Spike reading his comic, my side was a bit more haphazard.

Sure, Applejack was sitting properly, but Dash was sprawled out on my back asleep and Pinkie was using my flanks as a pillow.

Couldn’t really say I minded, I was over half again the size of the girls, comparable in height to Big Mac, though I was significantly leaner than the massive stallion. It meant there was plenty of room on my back for Dash to make a bed while waiting for the comparatively slow train to get us to Canterlot.

Dash wasn’t a surprise, she’d been delightfully snuggly ever since we’d started going out… hell, was it really just two weeks ago? Not that I’d say that how delightful I found her snuggling was in public, I’d watched more than enough anime to know that teasing a tomboy about her less ‘awesome’ traits was a quick way to the observatory.

Y’know, what with all the stars she’d make me see.

But it was Pinkie that sort of surprised me, she wasn’t exactly a snuggler, and I hadn’t expected her to fall asleep on the train ride. But eh. What were friends for if you couldn’t use them as a pillow?

… a lot of things, really, but eh.

Rarity huffed, grabbing Twilight’s head with her forelegs and turning it this way and that as her teal magic manipulated the brush, to much grumbling from the lavender unicorn, “You’ll thank me later darling.”

I couldn’t help but chuckle, earning a scowl from Twilight, which admittedly only made me grin at her.

With a small sigh, Applejack laid her head against my shoulder, making me stiffen briefly before I forced relaxation back on myself in spite of the spike of my heart-rate.

Now it was Twilight’s turn to smirk at me, to which I responded with an utterly eloquent and refined raspberry.

Okay, sure, I intellectually knew I was dating both Applejack and Dash. Intellectually I knew that herds, where three or four mares and one stallion made a family unit, were standard operating procedure for ponies. Intellectually I knew that these two mares actually liked one another as much, if not more, than they liked me.

But intellectually was different from emotionally, especially considering my personal issues. I was from a freaking monogamous culture damnit! Harem animes were wish fulfillment! And nearly being raped off and on by pretty much every pony I ran into over the course of two years kinda gave me a teensy weensy, itsy bitsy, tiny winy, totally mild case of being fucking insane.

I was getting better, but there were still moments like this where everything was perfectly innocent and fine by even my own standards, but I’d stiffen and have a tiny freakout.

It was kinda embarrassing, since I knew better, but little steps people, little steps.

Applejack shifted, the length of her side pressing against mine as she got comfortable, using my shoulder as a pillow, the pleasant warmth causing my cheeks to heat up and an almost hesitant smile to appear on my face..

Rarity and Twilight both gave me a bit of a smirk at that. Heck, even Fluttershy was giving me a smile that made me want to scowl. So I pouted, pointedly looking out the window, settling in for the thankfully (unfortunately!) short ride to Canterlot.

With a grunt, I stretched my legs out as I stepped off of the train, my joints popping as I did.

It was with a practiced ease that I ignored the way ponies scampered out of my way. It wasn’t as bad as Ponyville had been, but they still gave me a large berth of personal space, almost a dozen feet actually. There were a few of those looks scattered amongst the ponies at the station, but this time it probably had more to do with my appearance than my previous… occupation. Yeah, let’s go with that word. That works.

I mean, I was big for a unicorn, and my light pink vest was a weird contrast with my blackboard green coat, but those were pretty normal in a big city like Canterlot. It was the scars that probably scared them off, freakin’ flighty ponies.

Twilight was quick to lead the way, setting a bit of a hard pace for our little group with Spike on her back. I trotted after her towards the carriage that waited for us outside the train station, Dash grumbling on my back at the jostling of her bed, earning an amused smile from me.

The crowd parted easily for us as we moved, though I had no doubts it was because of me than any of my friends.

Sure, I was missing half of my right ear, had two earrings in my whole left one, a trio of broad scars on my left cheek, and a scar that traced from the middle of my bottom lip all the way down my neck and chest, disappearing into my vest. At least my heavy vest, saddlebags, and my martial arts wraps hid the scarring on my torso and legs.

… okay, if I was in their place I’d be pretty wary of me too, but still! This was excessive. It was like casting Dragon Slave or Ultima on a single mudcrab!

There wasn’t really any doubt that this carriage was for us, what with all the royal guards and royal seal and royally plush cushions for Celestia’s royally plush flank and all, so we piled on in.

With a quick little hope, I was the last one in, the royal guard closing the door behind me even as he went to the yoke to help pull it along. I rolled my shoulders and dumped a sputtering Dash onto the seat with a grin, Twilight having set her own saddlebags in front of her and searching through them frantically, “Ohhhh, where’s my checklist?!”

“Quills, ink, paper, The Abridged Complete History of Equestria,” I started to list off as I grinned at Dash, the pegasus rolling over to scowl at me even as the rest of the girls settled into their seats and the carriage jerked into motion, “Advanced Universal Thaumic Theory, volumes one through three, the latest edition of Fundamental Physics Equations, the driest edition.”

Spike, who had slid into the seat beside Twilight and looking in the saddlebags, spoke up, “Check, check, check, check, check, and definitely check on the driest edition. Super boring.”

Dash suddenly smirked and I had a bad feeling, “Equine Psychology the Hundreds Series, Bit Economics by Macro, Micro, and– ACK-!” a pair of forehooves, one blue and one covered in rose-red silk had blurred out and latched around my neck, and next I knew I was on the seat in a chokehold.

“Check and check by the way,” Spike noted.

Damnit! I got cocky (kid)! Do a barrel roll! Press B to shoot!

With a twist and flex, I put a foreleg between Dash and I, pushing her far enough away to get the other between her legs and my neck, getting me some breathing room, “Nng-! The– The Schools of Magic in Depth by Lemondrops, flash caaAAArd-oof!” the pegasus had twisted and likely used her wings and the seat for leverage to roll us onto the floor of the carriage as it started to move, causing me to gracefully faceplant.

There was more rummaging as I twisted and turned before Spike spoke, “Check and check.”

“Woo! Go Dashie!” Pinkie, now fully awake, bounced in place on the seat.

“Then–!” with a grunt, I pushed off of the floor, wedging Dash into the corner between the seat and the floor, locking her in place with a squeak as I twisted around, “You should be good Twilight!” Now almost facing her, and with far better leverage, I was able to twist my neck out of her hold, wrapping my forelegs around her and pinning her own forelegs to her barrel. I grinned down at the pouting pegasus before turning to look up at Twilight, “You’ve got all of your bases covered, anything more would just be silly.”

“Don’t give up yet Dash!” my head swung to Applejack to pout at her, which only made her grin wider, “Ya’ ain’t beat yet!”

“Traitor, why don’t you ever cheer for me?” my head jerked to the side as the pegasus beneath me lunged up and barely missed latching onto my still-whole left ear, “Hah! That don’t work no more!”

“Ooohhhh, but what if I’ve forgotten something?” Twilight fretted, earning an eye roll from me as I held my head out of Dash’s reach, keeping her forelegs pinned to her sides with my own.

“Twilight, hun, don’t worry, just go over your flash carrRDDS–!” Ack! I forgot about the feather! Forgot about the feather!

My head reflexively jerked downwards as Dash tugged on her feather that I’d put into one of the earrings in my left ear, long enough for her to reach up and latch onto the ear proper with her teeth, and so I went tumbling back across the floor of the carriage.

“Woo! Get ‘im girl!”

Ceiling-Floor-Ceiling-Floor-BLUE-Floor-*THUD-!*

… Ceiling.

I huffed as Dash wiggled around a bit to get comfortable, my forelegs pressed against my torso by her body and my back wedged into the corner between the floor and seat, mimicking Dash’s position moments before with the beautiful pegasus’ body perpendicular to my own. Damnit

Applejack leaned over the edge of the seat to give me a quick little peck on the cheek, causing said cheek to heat up as I blushed, “Ah don’t cheer for ya’ when you’re wrestlin’ ‘cause ya’ usually don’t need it sugar,” she said with a bit of a smirk.

My attempts to get out of the position were half-hearted at best. For one, I knew that despite being bigger than Dash and no pushover myself, she was strong enough and had enough mechanical advantage to keep me pinned; I’d, learned that the hard way when she’d been training me in Rolling Earth style. For another, this was actually pretty comfy.

“I win~” Dash smugged good naturedly down at me.

Yes, it is a word. Twilight said so, so there.

… well, she had when she was deprived of her coffee. That had been hilarious.

I blew a little raspberry at her, earning a giggle that made my chest feel all warm and fuzzy before turning to look up at Applejack, “You say that, but last I checked, I tend to lose… because y’all cheat.”

Even as Twilight frantically went through her flash cards, the carriage rolling along, Rarity spoke up, “You know darlings, you two never did tell me how your first date went…”

My face heated up as I scowled at the fashionista, great friend or not that was an absolutely horrendous segway. Thankfully, I wasn’t alone in those feelings as Applejack joined me in the scowling session, “Are ya ever gonna drop that Rares?”

“Oh don’t say it like that dear! You make it sound like I’ve been asking forever!” her smile was coy, but it wasn’t fooling anyone, “It’s only been a week since Emeris and you had your first date after all.”

“You just want gossip,” I pointed out as Pinkie lost interest in the inside of the carriage now that I’d lost, instead leaning out the window and waving at ponies on the street.

Rarity’s hoof came up to her chest in (mock) indignation, “Is it wrong to want to be sure that my friends are doing well?”

“You know full well we’re doing okay,” I said with a raised eyebrow before reiterating, “You just want gossip.”

The admittedly beautiful marshmallow huffed, “Can you blame me? Your love life is the only one with anything interesting happening in it right now! Ever since Cadence and Shining Armor were married the political scene has been all up in a tizzy about who else they’re considering for their herd! It’s the only thing they talk about anymore and the marriage was over two years ago!” with a dramatic gesture, Rarity rolled over and draped a foreleg over her forehead, “But I know that they still want to enjoy their time with each other for at least a few more months now that there’s no risk of…” she cringed, her eyes flicking to me as her ears swept back, “Well…”

“No chance of my being in the same postal code ruining their honeymoon,” I supplied with only the slightest grumble at the thought. Man I’d hated that part of my curse.

“Yes, well,” Rarity continued with a brief wince from her place upside down, “It means that there’s no meaningful gossip going around about anypony’s love life right now! Your little herd is the most interesting thing happening! I’m gossip deprived!”

“Boo hoo,” I deadpanned, making Dash snicker and Fluttershy smile demurely even as Rarity pouted.

All of this went unnoticed by the frantic lavender unicorn who was flicking through her note cards at a rapid pace, muttering to herself under her breath. To be fair though, we didn’t really pay too much attention to her either, as Applejack huffed at her most prim and proper friend, “Ah don’t see why you can’t gossip about the love lives of other ponies in Ponyville.”

Flipping back onto her stomach and letting her forehooves dangle from the seat, Rarity pouted, “Well, since Fluttershy hasn’t worked up the courage to talk to Cheerilee about joining Big Mac’s herd,” the butter-yellow pegasus lit up like a fire hydrant, desperately hiding behind her mane, “There haven’t really been any big changes in Ponyville’s herd structure for the past few months. I mean, sure the twins are having a spat and Thunderlane’s been caught in the middle all over again, but that’s not gossip!”

I rolled my eyes as Rarity began her tirade. I really didn’t feel like this was the time to be concerned about things like this.

Laying my head on the floor, I closed my eyes, enjoying the closeness of Dash. Honestly, I was more concerned with how we’d been called. If it’d just been Twilight called in and we’d come to support her? No worries. But calling in me as well? That set off alarm bells.

See, the girls had all their special skills, but mine could be boiled down pretty easily: Business, Anti-Reality-Warping, Curses/Blessings, and Face-Punching.

The princesses had advisors that immersed themselves in the countries economics, as well as their own immense experience to draw from, so that wasn’t likely. Either of the princesses could deal with reality warping effects as good or better than I could and probably understood it better, so that was also unlikely.

I might be called in because of my knowledge of Curses and Blessings, or as I preferred to call them, Boons and Banes, but I doubted I was the only pony to study them thoroughly in recent memory. There were probably specialists that made me look like a chump, and definitely ones that were at least comparable and with greater experience.

But that left face punching. And while I didn’t consider myself great at it, I definitely wasn’t bad. Dash, what with three black belts, could kick my ass six ways from Sunday in hand to hand (Hoof to hoof, sorry), but if I was actually trying to hurt someone I could always whip out my Construct magic to even the playing field.

Those latter two options, the actually plausible ones? Didn’t bode well for why I’d been called in with the girls.

“And you’re not even listening anymore,” Rarity grumbled.

Cracking an eye open, I couldn’t help but smirk at her, “What clued you in?"

The fashionista pouted at me and just as I started to continue the snark, I felt something weird against my whole ear. Rarity and I both blinked, and my ear flicked once as my brain finally put two and two together and got four, realizing that someone was playing with my earring with a hoof.

Tilting my head some I looked up to find Applejack flicking her hoof idly at my ear with a pensive look on her face, “... AJ?”

The farmmare practically jumped, startled out of her reverie, “What? Ah wasn’t doin’ nothin’!” I didn’t believe her a bit, and I’d bet money that she’d been playing with the earring based around the flower she’d given me for our date.

While with Dash, I’d taken the Secondary feather she’d given me and placed it within an earring, Applejack had given me a bit more traditional flower that was the same color as her coat. I’d taken the time to enchant (bless being the technical term for living things) the flower so that it wouldn’t fall to pieces and worked it into another earring. I’d done that since my hair was too short to properly tuck them in and I… well, I wanted to hold on to these fragments of real affection…

Despite not believing her though, I didn’t press the cowpony, just shaking my head, “Nothing.”

“Applejack dear…” Rarity gave her friend a look I couldn’t really discern, her ears drooping. It was… concern and… something else?

“What?” she snapped, scowling at Rarity.

After a moment, the fashionista looked away, “Nevermind dear, it was nothing.”

The farmmare huffed, crossing her forelegs and looking out the window, the one Pinkie wasn’t hanging out of. Overcoming the awkwardness of the moment, Rarity turned towards the still bright red Fluttershy, attempting to coax her back out from behind her mane. Twilight was still stressing over her flash cards, Spike dutifully going through them with her.

… I think Pinkie was calling out to ponies by name… color me impressed. Which was probably some shade of chartreuse or something, but still, color me that!

Warm breath played across my ear, making me blush as the ear twitched, “Hey, you okay?” Dash whispered into my ear. The silk of my old tie that was wrapped around her foreleg brushed against me as she gave my neck a gentle squeeze, “You’re tense…”

I closed my eyes, suppressing a scowl as I whispered back, “Worried. I think there’s more to this than just some little test for Twilight.”

The pegasus was quiet for a moment, shuffling a bit tighter against me and scooching her head closer to my ear, “What do you think’s going on?”

My lips pressed into a thin line, my eyes still closed as I listened to the carriage roll along towards what I assumed was the palace, “Dunno, gonna have to find out.”

I followed after Twilight, who was leading the way. The lavender unicorn had composed herself at least a bit better, she’d found out where Celestia was waiting for her and off she went. Something I’d noted though in my paranoia was that the guard had said that the princesses, plural, were waiting. Yeah, alarm bells were a ringin’ in my head.

Twilight obviously knew the palace like the back of her hand… hoof. Right. Pony not Humey. I’m a dork. Anyways, she knew it well since she’d practically grown up here. I knew a whole lot of nothing, so I was just part of the pack of our friends following after her.

… okay, I knew some parts of the palace and it’s general layout, but I really preferred to avoid this place. It was fine now but beforehand it’d been rather unpleasant to be fawned over here–

My mismatched ears perked, “–the Crystal Empire’s magic cannot fall into the wrong hooves,” that was Luna’s voice, that… that didn’t sound good.

Twilight turned a corner to a set of double doors, coughing nervously and giving the room a weak smile as the rest of us caught up. It was Celestia’s voice that softly said, “I know little sister, it won’t.”

The rest of us came up to the doorway, and it was easy to see the two princesses. Now I knew the room, it was the one with the absolutely stunning stained glass windows of the various important events in Equestrian history, arranged tastefully along the hallway to best guide light through them.

I hated this room.

Personal reasons, usually avoided the damn thing like the plague.

My eyes fell back to the princesses and I found Luna’s gaze locked on me as she walked towards our group, Twilight walking past her down the beautiful red carpet towards her mentor, “You wanted to see us? To give me a test?” The adorable unicorn sounded somewhere between excited and terrified, “I brought my own quills–”

“Emeris,” Luna had drawn abreast our group, the rest of us waiting at the doorway while Twilight approached Celestia. Her voice was soft but her tone commanding, I’d guess she didn’t want to interrupt Celestia and Twilight.

“Princess?” I asked, my head turned towards her.

“Walk with me.”

“Of course Luna,” I spun on my rear hooves and followed after her down the hallway.

I could hear Twilight still talking as we walked away, “Um… oh! And plenty of paper to show my work!”

“Twilight, this is a very different kind of test–”

Luna turned another corner and despite my ears swiveling freely I could no longer make out what they were saying. I glanced over at the alicorn I was following a half step behind, “Do I want to know?”

“You shall find out soon enough, Sir Emeris.”

Right, shut up and follow, gotcha. Happily. Though now I’m curious on top of worried. Great.

A few minutes later, as we wound our way through the palace, a large member of Luna’s guard approached, one of the ones with the bat wings. I’d never learned the proper term for them since they were relatively rare outside of Luna’s guard… bat-ponies? “Princess.” She saluted with a wing as she approached, sounding surprisingly feminine despite of her bulk and size, being almost as tall as me but with significantly more mass.

Luna nodded at her subordinate, continuing to walk as she fell in step on the other side of the alicorn, “Shadow Play, good, have the others been notified?”

“Yes ma’am,” she nodded, and I noticed that her helmet lacked the usual crest (either brush or fin) that the most visible guards’ helmets usually had. She was a dark blue gray, a shade that I could only describe as the color of dark, her mane and tail both covered by her light barding. There were no gems set into or ornamentation to her dark purple armor; it was comprised of nothing more than simple, segmented plates, “The ponies are being gathered in the briefing room.”

“Thank you,” with a brief nod at her subordinate, Luna pressed on, “Let us not waste time.”

“Luna–” my question about what to expect was interrupted by a sudden *thwap* that made my head jerk forward with an accompanying sting.

“Don’t you dare refer to the princess so casually!” the bat-pony beside me hissed. And it was a very impressive hiss, my insides actually quivered a bit as my eyes blinked rapidly in confusion, shock, and a bit of fear. Though the bubbling irritation won out and I swung my head around to scowl at her.

But it was said princess that spoke, her voice gentle but uncompromising, “Shadow Play.”

The armored mare stiffened even as we walked, “Ma’am.”

“Emeris has a different relationship with my sister and I than most,” while technically true, having it put like that made me cringe, it made me sound more important than I was, “He is allowed to be more informal.”

While the bat-pony beside me scowled, she nodded, “Princess.”

Luna turned her head, her teal eye looking over her other shoulder at me, “Emeris, please wait until the briefing, I have much to explain.”

I sighed softly, “Alright princess.”

Falling into step with her again, I sighed softly. Great.

Still, that left something else. I slowed my pace just a bit, “Hey,” I met Shadow Play’s pale yellow eyes when she looked over, “Sorry, didn’t know the title was a big deal to you.”

She blinked, somehow surprised that I was apologizing. I mean, I’d offended her, I should apologize. Still, Shadow Play nodded a bit jerkily, “Thank you, I am sorry for reacting as I did.”

“Don’t worry about it, you’re forgiven,” I smiled warmly at her, which only seemed to confuse her more.

It was then that I noticed Luna was giving me a look over her shoulder. What? What did I do? Was it because I’d forgiven her? What was it with ponies saying I forgave too easily?!

With a huff, I looked away, staying in step behind the Princess of the Night.

It was several minutes of silence and at least a dozen twists and turns later that we came to a set of double doors at the end of a hallway. I might not have been able to follow how we got here, but I knew generally where we were: somewhere in Luna’s tower of the palace. Especially blatant not only because of the doors we’d gone through and the general decor, but also because of the pair of bat-pony guards at the doorway.

Strangely, there was also a unicorn in the traditional gold barding of the Solar Guard sitting outside the door. I cocked my head to the side as we approached, though Luna seemed to recognize him, “Ah, Quiet Mirror, are the others gathered inside?”

The almost silver-gray stallion nodded, “Yes princess.”

Ah-haha… Silver like a mirror. I get it. Funny. It was kind of interesting how their names always seemed to line up with their appearance and or talent in some manner or another. The former was understandable but the latter was just weird, I’d never found out why that was…

“And you are not because…?” Luna led with as we approached the door.

He shifted uncomfortably, his saddlebags jangling slightly against his sides, “Punic is already in there.”

“Ah, yes, that would explain it.” Luna, sweetie-pie, that explained a whole lot of nothing to me, “Come, let us not waste time.”

One of the bat-ponies at the door opened it with a wing, allow the four of us inside, closing the door behind me. I scanned the unfamiliar room as we entered.

In addition to those of us that had just entered, there were four ponies in the dimly lit room. I stepped up to the edge of the circle in the center of the room that the ponies had gathered around and sat down as Luna stepped into the center of it, “Thank you for waiting. The briefing for this quest starts now. The Crystal Empire has returned.”

While Quiet Mirror and the only other unicorn in the room both gasped, I wasn’t the only one that was confused.

I raised my hoof.

Luna gave me an unamused, sidelong glance as she continued, “Few remember it existed at all,” I put my hoof back down as Luna started to pace, “Even my sister and I do not know much, but what we do know is that it contains a powerful magic. One thousand years ago, King Sombra, a pony whose heart was darker than any night, took over the Crystal Empire. He was ultimately overthrown, turned into shadow, and banished to the ice of the arctic north. But not before he was able to put a curse on the Empire, causing it to vanish into thin air.”

Now scowling, I raised my hoof again. Luna apparently hadn’t anticipated this one, raising an eyebrow at me, “Yes, Sir Emeris?”

“Did this Sombra character have red irises with green…” I paused, my brain coming up blank, “Um, whites or whatever the proper term is?”

The still un-named unicorn in the room, a small fellow in a large black robe that covered most of his body sniffed, “The term is Sclera, fool,” he said with a sneer, his voice soft and raspy.

I didn’t roll my eyes, much, “Yeah, anyways, those.”

Luna scowled, “Yes, he did.”

My lips pressed into a thin line at that, “Then I think I blasted him about two years ago, not long after I…” hesitating, I searched for an appropriate term, nopony here seemed to recognize me, which was strange. Good, but strange. I settled on, “Arrived… in Equestria.”

The princess blinked twice before her eyes widened in realization, “I see.” Scowling, her ears swept back as her gaze locked with mine, turning around so that she faced my place in the ring of ponies, “I was not made aware of this. What happened?”

“A guard came to me about something in the north going screwy, so I went to handle it. I found this big shadowy cloud thing with…” I almost said ‘Christmas-y’ but realized the term didn’t work here, “The silly eyes. So I blasted it. I also found this spell that was failing nearby, it seemed like a barrier or seal, so I assumed that was what was keeping this thing contained. So I strengthened it.” I made a face, “In hindsight, I might have been kinda off in my assumption.”

Once again, Mr. Pale and Greasy spoke up, “Tch, and why would we believe a fool like you?” This time I actually turned to look at him, his coat was a pale yellow, almost like aged bone, and on top of his robes he was wearing a black cloak. Oh, and beneath the lank, black mane that hung on either side of his face? He was sneering at me. Great. “The guard would certainly come to the princesses before you.”

“Grave Danger,” Luna said gently yet firmly, interrupting the snark that had been about to leave me, “There were extenuating circumstances.”

The unicorn stallion scowled, but nodded, “Of course, m’lady.”

Luna turned back to me, “Emeris?”

“That was about it,” I shook my head, “I didn’t know a whole lot about magic at the time, I was just throwing power around. I found a shadow thing in the north, blasted it, and shored up a spell.”

The Princess of the Night nodded, “Hm. That changes nothing however. We know the following: If the Crystal Empire is filled with hope and love, this will be reflected throughout Equestria. But if it is filled with hate and despair…”

“Bad juu-juu up in the whazoo?” I ventured, getting more than a few weird looks. I raised an eyebrow at them in a very eloquent ‘What?’ look. I was weird. I knew it. I reveled in it, dammit. I liked being weird.

Then a deep voice from my right spoke up, “... is that supposed to be racist?”

I turned, finding a Zebra stallion almost my size two ponies over, “Ah… no. Not at all. It’s a cultural reference from my home, sorry.” I meant it too, shifting uncomfortably, “I didn’t realize that might come across that way, my bad.”

“Emeris,” it was all Luna had to say.

“Shutting up.”

She nodded before continuing, slowly pacing around the circle made by both the room and the people in it, “We have already sent Princess Mi Amore Cadenza and Captain Shining Armor to the Empire to secure it, but their forces have encountered problems.” Her horn lit up, as did the circle beneath her, an illusion appearing around her of a frozen tundra, a city that seemed to be far too temperate given its surroundings with a massive Eiffel Tower look-alike in the center, and mountain ranges off in the distance.

Her horn flashed once and the entire image was covered by surging flurries of snow, “In addition to the unnatural blizzard that surrounds the Empire, missives speak of wolves that fight even when they have lost limbs and enshrouded in darkness and cold.”

I winced, that did not sound fun.

“My sister is sending the Bearers of the Elements of Harmony to support Princess Mi Amore Cadenza and Shining Armor’s forces, and to find a way to protect the Empire,” she paused, her eyes sweeping to each of those of us in the circle around her, “I am sending you as the guards for the Element Bearers.”

Quiet Mirror at my right raised his hoof, “Princess, why do the Element Bearers need a guard?” he’d taken off his helmet, revealing a short purple mane in the style that guards tended to favor, “They’re some of the most capable ponies alive as shown at the Invasion of Canterlot prior to Gary’s arrival.”

I unconsciously winced at the name even as Luna nodded to acknowledge the question, “While my sister favors the minimal amount of force required to accomplish a task, I prefer to leave nothing to chance,” Translation: I prefer overkill. That thought made me smile briefly, “Given the situation, the severity of the consequences of failure, and the surprisingly coordinated resistance of these ‘shadow wolves’, we felt it was prudent to send additional forces to ensure the Element Bearer’s safety.”

Her teal eyes swept over us, “Any questions?”

Shadow Play, on my other side, raised her wing, “Capabilities of these ‘shadow wolves’ ma’am?”

“They continue to fight even after limbs have been removed. They seem able to reform after attacks which break them apart. Fire seems to slow their reformation, but does not appear to do permanent harm,” the alicorn of the moon scowled, “There have been unconfirmed reports of them running upon the wind.”

Luna’s wings ruffled some, “We do not have any information on their numbers or organization, though they are coordinated in some fashion. Our forces are having difficulty gathering any reliable information in the constant blizzard.”

Okay, now that had me scowling. That didn’t sound like anything normal… that sounded more like a Wendigo of shadows… I raised a hoof, “Are they confirmed to be physical?”

While that got me a couple of weird looks, several ponies including the little Grave Danger ass-hat nodded. Luna though scowled, “Yes. They have physical forms, merely ones shrouded in shadow.”

I scowled some, that meant I had no idea what these things were. Not a huge surprise, but from the looks around the room, everyone else was in the dark as well. Damn.

The large zebra raised a hoof, “How shall we be traveling?”

“By train for most of the distance to the frozen north, on hoof through the blizzard.”

Grave Danger asked a question that had me giving him a funny look, but Luna took it just as seriously as mine so there was definitely something behind it, “Limitations on spellcasting?”

“None other than your own discretion,” now that was an interesting answer, “I fear that this situation is more dire than it currently appears.”

Now the lone earth pony in the group spoke, and when I finally really paid attention to him I found myself in the unusual situation of looking up at someone, “What forces do we currently have deployed?”

Before… well… back when I couldn’t talk with people, I’d only had to look up at things like dragons, but even now I was able to look Big Mac in the eye comfortably. This earth pony was almost the height of Luna herself, and had the proportional mass of a draft horse like Big Mac. This guy was freaking massive. How’s the weather up there?

“Shining Armor took his personal company of the Equestrian Guard, two hundred strong,” Luna’s visage darkened for just a moment, “Current losses are two earth ponies, six pegasi, and four unicorns.”

Oh, well… damn. Now I feel bad for making jokes.

A poignant silence hung for a minute before Luna spoke, “Any other questions?” I shook my head, as did a few others, “As this team draws from almost every branch of the Equestrian military, I shall make the introductions.”

She nodded at the large bat-pony beside me, “Shadow Play, Againap, Lieutenant of my own Lunar Guard.” Hah! Didn’t have to ask about the term. … where the heck did that one come from anyways? Pegasus and unicorn made sense, but againap? The heck…

I did notice that the Lieutenant had removed her helmet, revealing that her black mane had been cropped short as she saluted, “Ma’am.”

Luna’s head turned to the next pony in line, and I had a sudden, sneaking suspicion, “Cumulus Rose, Wonderbolt Sergeant.” The hereunto silent pegasus saluted at this, her light pink coat contrasting with the blue of the Wonderbolt’s uniform, though it matched her blue mane.

Her hood/mask and goggles hung around her neck, her salute crisp and efficient. Gotta admit, kinda liked that. Beside her was a massive… sword? Double-bladed sword? Sword-staff? I dunno, I hadn’t seen something like it before, I’d have to ask later.

With a return nod, Luna moved to the next pony around the circle and I knew for certain that she was leaving me for last. Damnit Luna.

“Punic, Major of the Equestrian Army,” the only earth pony of the group and big enough to make me consider compensating for something. Are we not going to talk about the fact that this is the single biggest pony I’ve ever seen outside of alicorns and he’s wearing more metal than the rest of the ponies here combined?

He bowed his head in a smooth motion, placing an armored hoof to his chest as he did, “It is an honor to be here, your highness.” He wore thick plating and chainmail, almost resembling a knight in full plate armor. Only his head was visible, his coat a white to rival Rarity or Celestia’s, and it was my ‘beauty sessions’ the former subjected me to that let me identify an immaculately styled mane and tail.

“To be asked to work with such luminaries as Grave Danger and Quiet Mirror is truly something few are worthy of,” his mane and tail were a dark brown like my own, though his mane lay flat against his neck and his tail was long and almost perfectly straig– Wait, hold the phone, asked?

I gave the pony a funny look, noticing Quiet Mirror cringing slightly at that. This was the guy that made the unicorn beside me uncomfortable to be around. With a phrase like that… okay, a different set of alarm bells were going off, my DiD sensors were firing, also known as ‘Douchebag in Disguise’ alerts.

Still, Luna only nodded and moved on to Mr Dark and Greasy who looked like this was a great sacrifice on his part to be here.

Now, I know that judging a book by its cover is a no-no, but ooooohhhhhh, I was a judgin’, I was a judgin’ like I belonged in a Phoenix Wright game, “Grave Danger, Broken Horn Coven, Arch Warlock.” I blinked even as there were a few soft, sharp intakes of breath around the circle, the term Broken Horn was familiar but I didn’t know what it meant. That said, Arch Warlock sounded pretty damn impressive, gotta admit.

Then the little unicorn, probably no taller than Twilight, made a ‘can we get on with it’ gesture with a foreleg, the voluminous sleeve of his robe flapping around some as he did.

Aaaaaand he went right back into the douchebag box.

Luna moved on, not addressing the near insult even though I could practically feel Shadow Play stiffen beside me. She’d gotten to the zebra, a bit bigger than the average stallion and well muscled, “Qabanna, a Zenith Guard Lieutenant,” the zebra bowed, his mane and tail were both short, tied down with leather string, an oddity to say the least in a herbivorous species. Unlike Zecora, he didn’t have gold earrings or decorations, instead having vines wrapped around his limbs and… were those thorns in his ears? Okay, that was hardcore, “He’s been acting as an attache of ours doing work in the Zebrican lands and has only recently gotten back in.”

Given that she’d given him an explanation and not the others… I noticed that he was getting some curious looks from some of the others around me, Grave Danger and Shadow Play being the only ponies that weren’t staring a bit. I could kind of understand why, unlike the others, his cutie mark was exposed, a stylized hoof with thorns sticking out of it. There was a surprising amount of scarring on his torso and legs, greater than even my own but easily missed beneath his stripes.

Luna came to the wiry unicorn beside me, “Quiet Mirror, Zenith Guard Captain.” While standard guard armor barely covered a cutiemark, he had a large pair of saddlebags that covered the rest of his thighs… most unicorn magic eschewed additional foci or materials, and traditional combat as far as I could tell didn’t involve anything like potions or single use items, so… what did he have in those…?

He gave her a quick salute before giving the room a nod, conspicuously skipping over Punic.

Welp, this was about as suspicious as a jock at an anime convention… the fuck was it with these two?

“And finally, Sir Emeris Fillson, Knight of Equestria,” I cringed just a bit at the title, I really hated titles for myself. Sure, this one was mostly legit and Celestia was using it as a political play that I was caught up in, but that just made it less stomach turningly disgusting to me.

It was at that point that Luna dropped the bomb, and apparently I was Hiroshima, “He will be the leader of this team.”

A half second’s silence–

“What?!” I wasn’t the only one that shouted at that as I leapt to my hooves, more than a few of my fellows in the room had as well, though others had merely given the princess a strange look as the room erupted in voices.

“This unknown? I’ve never heard of him before, what qualifies him for–” the massive Punic started, his deep voice controlled but loud.

“Ma’am I know he’s different but how can you put him in charge–” Shadow Play practically bristled beside me, having leapt to her hooves and her wings flaring.

“What qualifications does this stallion have to lead a team like ours in defense of the Element Bearers–?” this was Cumulus Rose, who’d also gotten to her hooves, almost knocking over her massive blade in the process.

I didn’t add my voice to the din, instead giving a Luna a look that spoke for me. Why? Why me?

”ENOUGH!!!” my hooves slid across the tile floor slightly at the force of the Royal Canterlot Voice, my teeth gritting even as Luna returned to a more mortal shout, “The decision was made by both my sister and I!” The room went silent as fierce teal eyes swept across the gathered ponies, “Punic, you have not heard of him because we have not wished it. My sister and I have avoided letting him become known for reasons of our own.”

The heavily armored stallion didn’t scowl, but I could see his lips press into a thin line as his ears swept back and he tilted his head up slightly in a sniff.

She turned to Cumulus Rose, “Emeris has greater experience in dealing with situations like this than any here except possibly myself. He has dealt with situations of both extreme danger and unknowns, having led the ponies on site in defense on numerous occasions.”

“Luna.” I said softly, but with every bit of warning I could put into my voice in spite of the tremors in my chest. This wasn’t a dream, this wasn’t the place to talk about these things.

But she met my gaze with one just as hard, “Sir Emeris, you dislike acknowledging it, but you have your talents.”

“My talents are accounting and runic magic since the way unicorns are taught doesn’t encourage it. All that experience you’re talking about doesn’t matter anymore, I was used to being the strongest thing on the battlefield, I’m not anymore, and as for my… ‘experience leading’,” I practically spat the phrase with all the bile I could muster, and I could muster up a lot, “You know why that doesn’t count.”

“Celestia and I disagree,” Luna said without hesitation, her wings extended slightly as she looked down at me, “While you are certainly lesser than you were, you have proven that you still retain at least a fraction of your skill.”

“How?” while it still came out accusatory, it was equal parts curiosity and disbelief.

“The timberwolf pack,” she said simply.

I winced slightly at the reminder of the source of many of my scars, “That could be a fluke,” I protested weakly, only now noticing that every other pony in the room was silently watching my confrontation with the princess, “But it didn’t show leadership on my part.”

“You led the Apple family rather well in saving your own life in spite of being near death at the time,” she countered, her eyes hard.

Snorting, I looked away, “One event does not a confirmation of skill make.” Yoda my mentor–…

“But it does indicate that the skill you showed previously still applies.” Yoda! Why hast thou forsaken me?!

Well, I certainly didn’t feel like it did, but I couldn’t come up with a good counter argument. Snorting, I turned away, “I still don’t think this is a good idea.”

“Your feelings have been noted Emeris, and were expected. But my sister and I are in agreement here,” Luna’s term brooked no contradiction, her wings slightly flared outwards, “You are going to lead this team in its defense of the Element Bearers. At the Crystal Empire you shall be turning over command of the team to Shining Armor, the leader of this operation’s more militaristic elements.”

With a sigh, I bobbed my head once, “Alright.”

I wasn’t happy with this. I really didn’t think I was the right person for this job, but I trusted Luna, and I trusted Celestia. I’d put my life in the Princess of the Sun’s hands… hooves… time and again, willingly, and while she’d made mistakes, she’d done better than I could have.

“Now that that has been settled,” mind you, Luna didn’t sound happy about this mess either, probably because I’d questioned her in front of others the way I had, I’d have to apologize for that later, “Are there any other questions?”

I wasn’t going to apologize for having issues with this plan though.

“Is there an estimated duration of this mission?” it was Punic that spoke even as I let my ass slide back to the tile floor of the dimly lit room.

“We currently do not have any solid estimates,” Luna made a half turn to speak to him directly, “But anticipate greater than a fortnight.”

As Punic nodded, Quiet Mirror spoke up, “Who’s in charge of logistics?”

“The castle quartermaster will see to your initial supply, but your team will be on your own once you are in the Crystal Empire,” the princess scowled, her wings ruffling and tail flicking slightly in agitation, “We have not been able to establish a proper line of supply through the blizzard and wolves.”

Well fuck. Gotta pack some food then, water shouldn’t be a problem with all the ice around.

Grave Danger spoke up, a scowl on his face, “What’s the full chain of command for this?”

“Myself, Shining Armor, Emeris, Twilight Sparkle, yourself, Punic, Quiet Mirror, Shadow Play, Qubanna, and Cumulus Rose.”

A quick glance around the room confirmed that nopony else had anything to bring up, so with a curt nod, Luna spoke, “So be it, the train shall be leaving at sixteen hundred from the High Canterlot Station, dismissed.”

Salutes of various kinds came from us, my own a quick nod as I turned, “Emeris.”

Damnit. “Princess?”

“Please stay, there are other things you must be informed of as team leader.”

“As you wish,” I let my flanks fall to the tile with absolutely excessive grace and poise, and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise! Except for, ya know, anyone with a functioning eye and attached brain. But aside from them! Not a soul!

The others filed out of the room, all except for the smallest unicorn. Grave Danger? Yeah, that was right… the door closed and he still stood in the room.

“Grave Danger,” Luna’s tone was patient, “This is a confidential meeting.”

“If it’s about him having been Gary,” my entire body tensed, “Then I would like to stay.”

The Princess of the Night’s eyes widened some even as I forced myself to relax. Damn near everyone else has known who I was immediately… mind you my sampling size was just Ponyville… but these ponies hadn’t known… “And what makes you believe that Grave Danger?”

“Tch,” he snorted, “It’s obvious. He tensed at the mention of the name, you speak of him being lesser than he was and of amazing feats he’s accomplished. Even without having met Gary, I can identify the unnatural sensation of an Outsider which the Starcloak reports confirmed Gary possessed.” The pale unicorn sneered, “But if the others couldn’t figure it out then they’re bigger fools than I give them credit for.”

I blinked at that. I felt unnatural…? Why hadn’t anyone told me?

… I mean, it made sense, but I’d have thought the girls would have told me about that at some point… maybe you had to be trained to notice it…?

The princess scowled slightly, closing her eyes in thought as her wings shifted, “I’ll have to deny the request Grave Danger, this is of personal nature for Emeris. Just know that he is likely more capable with black magic than you expect.”

Grave Danger made a face, but bowed his head, “As you wish princess.” Turning on a hoof, he walked out past me without even a glance.

His horn flared a deep crimson as did the door, which was jerked open and then closed after him with almost surprising delicacy. A part of me recognized that shade, not just that of partially dried blood, but also the one that I’d had for almost two years… I did not like that color.

I shook my head as I turned back to the princess, “Is he always that much of an…” I paused, I’d been about to say ‘ass’ but that was actually racist here, “Ah, horseapple? Douchenozzle? … fuckface?”

The princess snorted in amusement, her ears perking even as she kept her smile subdued, “Unfortunately yes. He is loyal and extraordinarily competent… there is a reason he is the next in line for command after yourself. But he can be… cantankerous.”

“A fuckface,” I rolled my eyes, “Joys. Anyways.”

“Yes,” she nodded in acknowledgement, stepping out of the circle on the ground and walking towards me, “Emeris, I know that you studied black magic extensively while searching for a way to break your curse.”

“Futilely too it seems,” I snorted, “I was looking in the wrong places for a fix.” It’d had to do with full on reality warping magic to break that curse, and not a damn thing to do with black magics.

Stopping just in front of my sitting form, Luna looked down at me, “You are to use them on this mission.”

I paused, blinking, my ears swiveling back, then returning to their original position one after the other as I tried to get a handle on my confusion, “... princess?”

“I want you to use your black magics on this mission,” I couldn’t read her facial expression. I’d gotten better at translating the different facial structures and body language, but she had a freaking poker face.

“Princess…” I was confused, and not entirely sure how I felt about that, “I lost a lot when I ceased to be Gary…” my voice was soft as I looked up at Luna apologetically, “I remember less than half of the spells I learned in those two years.”

“Emeris, the limited amount you know is greater than that which Twilight Sparkle has been taught,” Luna reminded me, “And my sister and I am trusting you to act as a buffer between her precious student and the darker aspects of our world. This is her task, this team is only there to protect her and make her plans happen.”

I cocked my head to the side briefly, my left ear sticking out sideways in confusion, the earrings dangling from it. Something was off about her statement… like… no, it was something about– My mismatched ears suddenly perked up and my eyebrows went up as the realization hit me, “This actually is a test for her.”

The Princess of the Moon was quiet for a moment, “Yes, it is. I shan’t say much, but we are seeing how Twilight Sparkle handles responsibility and the leadership of her fellow ponies.”

“So… defer to her? Despite technically superseding her in the command structure?” I ventured, trying to understand the intent.

“If you can do so without being obvious, yes.”

“I’m not exactly capable of subtlety on command Luna,” I pointed out, earning an amused smile from her. Then she reached out and patted me atop the head with a forehoof and I just had to giver her a ‘Really?’ look, which admittedly only made her smile more.

“We have no doubt you’ll pull through.”

That made me scowl, “Luna–”

“In the ways that matter,” she talked over me, “You will likely be cantankerous and problematic, but we have every reason to believe that you shall be efficient and effective in your coordination of the team in protecting Twilight Sparkle.”

The princess quieted for a moment, her wings ruffling before her teal eyes met my gray-green ones, “And make no mistake Emeris, that is your primary task,” there was steel in her eyes and her tone as she continued on, “More so than the lives of you or your team, you must protect the Element Bearers. Allowing Twilight Sparkle’s test to continue unimpeded is secondary to this.”

I blinked once, absorbing that. It was one thing to hear someone from fiction say that a task was more important than their own life or such, it was another to hear it said to you… and it was rather unsettling to be told, straight out, that someone else’s life was more valuable than your own, and that you were expected to sacrifice yourself in their place. I wasn’t military before all of this, this was something new to me.

“Understood,” the soft word came out before the thoughts were even finished.

Because… I agreed. Their lives were more important than mine. Not just because they were my friends, but because they were the fucking Elements of Harmony.

The reaction made Luna smile briefly before a more serious look returned to her face, “It is because of this that I am ordering you to use every power available to you. Any black magic you still retain from your studies that could help, any at all, should be used.”

I winced at that, my ears drooping, “That’s very little Luna…” Most of my skill that I’d retained dealt with the ability to create formulaic constructs fueled by my magic and willpower, basically green-lantern constructs. I had dabblings of other magics, the basics of elemental magic, some piss-poor illusions, three versions of a short range teleport… when you got right down to it, I didn’t have much going for me.

Admittedly, I could bless or curse living things pretty well and I could do some comparatively mean runic inscriptions given time. Ponies just didn’t have many runic enchanters since the way unicorns were classically taught didn’t lead well into learning runic magic, whereas my background of accounting and light coding was almost ideal. It had allowed me get to a level of not suck with the little squiggles and dots and slashes that most unicorns never bothered to achieve.

“Celestia suspected as much,” Luna said, “But we will fix that in time. For now, you have a task to accomplish and a team to lead.”

Pushing myself to my feet (hooves, damnit brain, get with the program), I nodded, “Princess.”

“Dismissed.”

Following the guard through the twists and turns of the palace, there was a fair bit of relief as I stepped out of the castle. I mean, sure it was sunshine and rainbows out here, but it could be worse.

Walking across the threshold of the doorway, I suddenly felt… out of place? Wrong? Like… I was intruding on something… it was… it was a new feeling. I’ve felt like an outsider plenty of times but this was… it was different.

I hesitated, not sure if I should continue. I preferred to trust my gut unless logic dictated otherwise and logic said nothing here…

But… I was curious, and I needed to find the girls to talk to them. So I flipped the mental coin and went with it, slowly walking forward.

I heard… a tune? As I slowly walked down the marble steps, it was at the edges of my hearing… more a feeling than an actual sound… It… it was familiar and beautiful and yet… yet I felt like I shouldn’t be here. My ears perked forward and I blinked Was that Twilight’s voice…?

“–for I can do so many tricks~ But I wasn’t prepared for this~” sang a beautiful voice that I could hardly believe I recognized.

Stepping around the corner, I found a full on song and dance routine going on, Twilight going down the street, the other girls beside her as the various ponies sung supporting parts. Yeah, it was Twilight, damn girl, when did you learn how to sing…?

“Levitation would have been a breeze,” her horn lit up and Fluttershy was floated by in her lavender aura, the pegasus letting out a little giggle, “Facts and figures I could recite with ease~”

I blinked as I watched her recite the square root of five hundred forty six. It… this was beautiful and wonderful but… I was intruding. There was no question, I shouldn’t be here…

“I could ace a quiz on friendship’s bliss,” she sang as she almost danced her way back and forth across the street. The sparse ponies already out of her way and humming parts even as they moved.

It was then that the other girls started to step up and sing main parts rather than merely echoing her, Applejack stepping up beside the lavender unicorn, “She could save a farm from a pair of thugs~”

“She can save a city from an invasion of bugs~” Dash sang with surprisingly good tone as she landed on Twilight’s other side.

Fluttershy and Pinkie fell into step behind Twilight, the pegasus singing as she leaned in towards her friend, “She could help a pony stand up to a dragon~”

Pinkie’s head leaned in to meet Fluttershy’s as she sang, “She could save a pony when her spirits are flaggin’~”

But… that didn’t mean I had to leave. Stepping back, I leaned my shoulder against the wall as I watched and listened, smiling as I enjoyed the… heartsong? Yeah, that was the name. I’d never heard any of the girls sing before in spite of being here for over two years, and each one had a beautiful singing voice. This was honestly pretty wonderful.

“She could bring a town together~” with a voice that was soothing to the ears, Rarity sung as she flanked the group cantering down the cobblestone street, “Help us through any weather~”

“She could save me from dragons who were all meanies,” Spike was the odd one out, lacking the beauty to his singing voice that the girls had, but with equal emotion, “Help me raise a phoenix who's just so teensy~”

“But I wasn’t prepared for this~” Twilight sang as she dramatically stepped forward, gazing upwards at the sky, she looked to her friends on her right, “Will I pass?” she turned to her other side, “Will I fail?”

A small smile appeared on my face as I shook my head, leaning against the wall. Silly Twilight, you could do this. You’re not perfect, no, but you’ve got the girls to catch you if you fall.

“My mind is sharp, my skills intact, my heart is pure…,” Twilight came to a stop, bringing a hoof to her chest, “But can I lead them right and sure~?”

My left ear cocked to the side as I looked away in thought, the echo line from the rest of the girls going unnoticed. Though if someone had pushed her over… I suppose now it was my job to stab them repeatedly. I considered that thought.

“Oh I’ve taken my share of licks,” the lavender unicorn sang to one side and then the other, “I’ve made it through thin and thick.”

Yeah… I was okay with that. I liked this job and was happy to be a part of it. Definitely better than just having a title and pay. Except for the whole possibility of getting stabbed myself, that would probably suck in the moment, but hey, ya win some ya lose some.

Still, I’d help the girls convince Twilight she could handle this, not to mention helping her through it.

“But no I wasn’t…” the feeling of intrusion peaked as the song reached a crescendo, “Prepared for this!”

The song closed and a small smile made its way onto my face as the girls held a pose. Pushing myself off of the wall, I walked over towards the gathering of multicolored female ponies, no longer feeling the intense discomfort of intrusion.

Well, not the supernatural kind. Sure, the ponies in the street gave me a larger than normal bubble of personal space, but I was accustomed to this sort of reaction. I didn’t bother acknowledging it as the ponies went back to their lives after the heartsong and I got close enough to hear the girls talking in a more conversational volume.

“–ear, we’ll get through this. Together,” Rarity had thrown a foreleg around Twilight’s withers in a comforting hug.

“Yeah!” Dash pumped a hoof from her place hovering nearby, “We’ll definitely save this Crystal Kingdom or whatever it is!”

“They’re right Twilight–” I started, but was interrupted when Fluttershy squeaked and dove behind Applejack, though most of the other girls had stiffened as well. The girls turned around, Fluttershy peeking over Applejack and blushing as she realized it was just me.

“Em!” Dash exclaimed, flying over, her scratchy voice surprisingly comforting to me as she asked, “Where were you big guy?”

“Being briefed by Luna,” I said as I walked up into the circle of ponies, Dash hovering by my side, “I’ve been put in charge of a team and ordered to keep you girls safe.” I swept my eyes around the group before locking eyes with Twilight, “And as I was saying before, the girls are right, you’ve got us to help make this happen.”

“But… Celestia’s put me in charge… and I haven’t studied for this–”

“But you’ve got plenty of practice leading the girls and Ponyville in saving the day,” I countered, steamrolling her nervousness and objections with a smile, “It’s going to be hard, but we’ll make it work.”

“But I’ve never been given this kind of responsibility!” the purple unicorn countered with a scowl, her tail flicking in agitation as we settled into a rough circle in the middle of the street.

It was mean, but I smirked, “Oh obviously, it’s an entire country. It’s not like you’ve been tasked with defeating a god of chaos that threatened the entire world or were expected to stop the goddess of the night from plunging the world into eternal darkness with no prior knowledge or anything.” I shrugged, turning to look over at Dash, who was barely containing a snicker, “Or like she accomplished both of those tasks without any previous training or knowledge of the situation.”

Twilight rolled her eyes with a sigh, a small smile on her face in spite of what I'd guess to be her best efforts, “You can be such a horseapple sometimes.”

“Only on–” I paused, blinking and turning to look at Applejack, “What day is it again?”

It was Pinkie that volunteered the information, “Ooh! Thursday! It’s Thursday.”

“Ah thanks Pinkie,” I smiled at her before returning to Twilight in an over the top tone, “Only on Thursdays!”

That earned me several groans and eyerolls, even Fluttershy demurely coughed into her hoof as Twilight countered, “I think you mean only on days ending in the letter ‘Y’.”

My eyes brightened as I pointed a hoof at her, “Ooh! Ooh! That one! I like that one! Let’s go with that.”

There were the facehooves covering smiles. I’d done my job, they were a bit more relaxed. Letting my grin fade into a more subdued smile, I continued, “But regardless, we’ve only got a few hours to get geared up for this mess. While the city itself seems temperate, there’s a supernaturally harsh blizzard around it so we’ll need to have some warm clothes.”

“And we might need food since it’s in the tundra, we don’t know what kind of stores the Crystal Empire currently has, and probably water in case the blizzard has tainted the snow…” Hrm, I hadn’t thought of that, good idea. Twilight trailed off before turning back to me, “We can pick up things from my parents, they’ll have plenty of things.”

“I’ve been given access to the castle’s resources and quartermaster for supplies, that’s where I was about to suggest.”

Twilight rubbed a hoof against her chin and I finally noticed that the other girls heads had been bouncing back and forth between us like a tennis match, which made the corner of my mouth quirk up in amusement, “Okay… Emeris, I want you to go to the quartermaster and pick up saddlebags for everypony that doesn’t have them as well as some water and military rations. Also, swing by the library to pick up Rune Temperature, 72 Degrees of Magical Inscription and For the Love of Runes.”

Her head swung to the alabaster unicorn beside her, “Rarity, we’re going to pick up some cloth and materials from my parents house for you to work with on the train ride, and between the three of us we’re going to enchant the outfits for protection against the elements and to help fight off whatever these things are.”

Purple eyes swept across the group, “Any objections or ideas?” I shook my head, as did most of the others, at which Twilight nodded, “Alright, Applejack, Dash, go with Emeris to help him carry the stuff. He could do it with his magic but we’ll need every drop of it when it comes to the enchanting. Fluttershy, Rarity, Pinkie you’re with me for the same reason. We’ll spread the weight of the cloth out between us.”

Another round of nods, causing a small smile to appear on Twilight’s face, “Alright, let’s go!”

With a quick nod, we broke up into the two groups, three of us heading back towards the castle as the other four turned down the street. Still, I couldn’t leave without two other things, “Fluttershy?”

“Um, yes?” the butter yellow pegasus said, her eyes blinking as she stopped and half turned.

“Sorry about startling you, didn’t mean to do that,” I said, knowing that the other girls had stopped to see what we were doing, though I missed the glance that was shared between them.

She smiled gently at me, “It’s alright, you’re forgiven,” a small bit of tension in my chest eased, “B-But you didn’t need to apologize for that. I’m sorry I’m such a scaredy cat.”

A small smile appeared on my face, “I could turn that back around on you, you don’t need to apologize for being startled. Thank you for caring though.”

The smile that appeared on Fluttershy’s face made more than a few parts of me quiver, damn pony hormones and her being freaking adorable and sexy at the same time. I wasn’t interested but damn, she could conquer the world if she put her mind to it.

“Regardless,” Twilight said, thankfully interrupting the moment I knew I’d make awkward in a few moments, “We have work to do girls.”

“Right,” I turned, “Let’s go.” A small smirk appeared on my face as we started to trot and I called out over my shoulder, “And you thought you couldn’t do this Twilight! You sure seem to be doing good to me!”

It was with a smile that Twilight hurled back over her shoulder, “And you seem to still be a horseapple!”

Yeah, she’ll be okay. Shifting to a solid canter, I led the way back to the castle and towards a guard, knowing full well that I had no idea where the quartermaster was and that we’d need directions. Time to save the world, only it wasn’t me responsible for the job, it was me helping someone else… and that made it so much better. Not even being sarcastic there.

An admittedly nasty grin wormed its way onto my face at the thought. It was wrong, to be happy that I didn’t have the responsibility, but I was.

A soft southern drawl interrupted my thoughts as we cantered up the steps, “Em, what’re ya thinkin’?”

I glanced over at Applejack briefly before smiling, feeling poetic, “Onward into the darkness of the unknown, onwards to fight the villains and slay the monsters.” My smile became a grin, “Onwards to face the things that go bump in the night…” the grin became vicious, “And onwards to bump back.”

Author's Notes:

Welcome newcomers and old hats to the first chapter of Consequences of Darkness! Thanks for sticking with the whole first chapter.

If you haven't read the previous story, don't worry. If I've done my job right you shouldn't need to at all.

I'm happy with this chapter, while it does feel a bit clunky to me that's mostly because of how I've written it for newcomers. I've got a couple lines in here I'm particularly happy about though. I do have a question of what tags are appropriate for this story, particularly Alternate Universe. I may have to add the Dark tag depending on how things play out in practice, but ironically it currently isn't planned.

Regardless, many thanks to my pre-readers/editors for helping make this possible and helping pen my raging plot bunnies and making this chapter as solid as it is.

But for new readers and old: I always encourage criticism and commentary and questions! It's the best way for me to improve when people point out where I suck or drop the ball.

Anyways, Decepticons, roll out!