Natalie was back-down on a bed in one of the guest rooms, her legs flailing about and her mouth wide open as a series of laughs escaped her throat. For ten whole minutes she had been like that, just howling nonstop like she was being molested all over by the tips of floating feathers. Matt sat next to her, waiting patiently for her to calm down, frowning when her face began turning a hue of red.

"L-L-L-Lance… is a-a fa-ha-father!?" Natalie screeched between laughs, her front legs pounding at the mattress while her back ones wasted no time kicking off the covers and sheets. Then she flipped over, one forehoof still hitting the cloud-like material while the other came over to rest beneath her chin.

Matt mutely nodded, and though he found the thought of his own superior attaining fatherhood rather amusing, his ears began ringing as his companion continued to laugh herself silly. His horn glowed, magic seizing Natalie's muzzle and clamping it shut, though it left a small hole in front of her nostrils. "Breathe, girl. You're gonna bust a lung at this rate if you keep laughing," he warned in a firm voice.

Natalie did as instructed, but she still managed to emit a few muffled chuckles that gradually hushed until all that her fellow Fantasian heard was a series of inhales and exhales through nostrils that repeatedly flared. "I know," Matt began, pausing to chuckle, "it's fucking hilarious." When he was certain that she wouldn't assault him with another cackling fit, he relinquished his magical hold on her maw, watching as she opened wide to suck in a deep breath.

"It's just… I don't know what that foal sees in him that could scream 'daddy material,'" Natalie replied in an amused tone, shaking her head rather solemnly in spite of a grin that formed on her face.

"Nor do I, to be honest," Matt sighed, shrugging. He spoke further when Natalie made eye contact with him, "Also… Twilight and her friends dropped by, and they brought some… thing I think you should meet physically."

Natalie's brow rose. "Beg your pardon?" she asked, her voice betraying none of her earlier amusement whatsoever.

Matt stood up and trotted to the door of the room, stopping to wait for her to follow. "Just… you gotta see him," he said, his form not budging an inch until his friend climbed out of the bed and cantered over to him. He opened the door with a hoof and stepped out into the hall with her tailing him, going past a few doors before veering to the left and heading for another door that was already slightly ajar. Natalie closed the door behind her and also arrived at the already-barely-open obstacle.

The half-Clydesdale rose a hoof and tapped at the doorframe instead of the door itself, knocking no more than five times. "Come in!" a masculine voice called from inside the room. The two obliged and opened the door the rest of the way, tottering inside to find Discord, Fluttershy, and Shining gathered around Lance, with the draconequus waving in greeting as he and the Emperor examined the extent of the damage on the general's back.

At a nearby table sat Twilight, scanning the pages of a book that lay bare before her with her horn aglow, and she waved with a hoof before flipping a page with her magic. To one side of the book was a piece of paper, along with a small inkwell and a quill that floated in her magic that she used to jot down notes upon said paper. She occasionally stopped writing, breaking away from the paper and what notes she had already scrawled to look at Lance's wings while Discord revealed the runes with his talon.

Natalie paled upon seeing Discord, and she stiffened on the spot. Fluttershy turned to her and sighed. "He won't bite. I've already had a talk with him," she said in a reassuring tone.

"I can vouch for that," Lance piped up, raising a hoof and waving it in confirmation.

Twilight pried her gaze from the page she was reading and the notes she had thus far, turning to look at Shining. "How bad is the damage?" she asked.

Shining turned to look at his sibling, a frown on his face. "Very. I can see smidgens of his wing joints, and they're pink and bald. What little I can see of his feather tracts are… they're swollen. It's like the feathers that haven't regrown want to get out," he answered.

"And what about the runes on his false feathers?" Twilight continued, raising a hoof and making an invisible circle in the air with it, urging Shining to go on.

"Ask him, not me," Shining replied, using a hoof to point at Lance for emphasis.

"Damned if I know!" Lance exclaimed, waving his hoof again, this time in a dismissive manner. This caused Twilight to groan, and Matt and Natalie to roll their eyes and shake their heads in unison. Twilight nodded and turned back to her notes, which filled half of the paper, and flipped through another page in the book to start scanning the next batch of rune translations.

Matt decided to speak up, "So, what is going on here?"

"I'm trying to translate the runes on his wings so I can make a counter-spell to get the metal off of his backside," Twilight answered, her tail swishing and swashing as if swatting away bugs that had yet to latch onto her. "I'm still impressed that, from a technical standpoint, he wasn't even lying about the state of his wings!" she groaned, and began gritting her teeth again at the mere thought of it.

"Would you have believed him if he said his wings were layered with metal, without seeing them before 'they're caked in steel and copper' came out of his mouth?" Natalie retorted with eyes going half-lidded and a small frown forming on her muzzle, causing Twilight to stiffen with her remark. Her swishing tail stopped, resting flat on the floor with some of its hairs curling up like broken guitar strings.

"No…" Twilight answered, slumping and with ears folding back. She took another look at the steel-bound limbs and her frown deepened. "Now that I think about it, Spike and the others wouldn't have believed it, either. Up until today, I always thought of hex-bound wings that use metal as an anchor point… absurd, along with a myriad of other things. Heck, I used to think wraiths were just monsters in old foals' tales used to scare fillies and colts into behaving."

"Therein lies my point," Natalie scoffed, garnering a slow nod from the mare whose tail stopped moving. She turned to Shining and asked, "Is it alright if I took a trot around the Empire's streets for a while?"

Shining turned to Natalie, a brow raising and a tight frown forming simultaneously. "What for?" he replied.

"Sightseeing," Natalie stated tersely with a shrug. "I have little to do in the palace, and I'd like to stretch my legs and breathe in a little fresh air…"

Shining turned to look at Lance, who promptly waved a foreleg dismissively. "Ah, what the hell. I see no harm in it," Lance murmured, giving Shining a short nod of his head. "If you find a tavern, don't cause a hassle—it's all I ask," he added, turning to his subordinate and just barely missing the Emperor's brow raising even higher.

Natalie nodded. "Alright. I'll be back by sundown," she promised. With that, she trotted out of the room by herself, leaving Matt and the others to turn to the spot where she stood before her departure.

Shining turned to Matt for a minute, then back to Lance. "Why would she head to a tavern? Furthermore, why'd you tell her not to raise a fuss if she does find one in these parts?" he asked.

"One, it's your Empire. What good would it do for me or my subordinates to heckle your citizens needlessly?" Lance retorted, and he paused to draw in a breath before releasing a heavy sigh. "Two, a tavern's basically an all-in-one; the tool shed of the business world. Food, drinks, some even have beds and free samples. Fuck, may as well slap in an exhibit for foals while you're at it!"

Shining's brow lowered so fast that Matt missed it just by blinking his eyes once, though his face did not contort in any other way. "So, she might get some more food or something to that effect?" he asked.

Lance nodded. He barely heard Matt mumble under his breath, "I hope she doesn't get hurt…"

Shining turned to Twilight once again. "How's progress so far?" he asked.

"I'm… if I were to estimate, ninety-five-percent done translating the runes. I just need to translate one or two more, and then I can work on the counter-spell," Twilight answered, using her magic to lift the paper up and positioning it so that it faced her brother note-side forward. The entirety of the parchment had been filled impeccably, and it had just an inch of blank space left on the bottom.

"Damn, you're efficient," Lance noted, turning to the paper and letting off a low whistle.

"Do you need another sheet just for the counter-spell itself? That one's about full," Discord stated, using his paw to gesture to the floating parchment for emphasis.

Twilight donned a grin, and made another piece of blank paper materialize in a flash of light. "I've already got spares, thank you," she replied, a glint in her eyes.

Shining grinned, turning to Lance. "That's my sister—always shows up prepared," he chirped.

~-—-~-—-~-—-~-—-~-—-~-—-~-—-~-—-~-—-~-—-~-—-~-—-~-—-~-—-~-—-~-—-~-—-~-—-~

Natalie trotted through the streets of the Empire, her artificial crystal sheen renewing as she hummed a merry tune. She spotted remnants of power in the roads themselves, bright teal pulses of mana that shot out as the residents trotted past and around her to do various activities. Some of said residents waved, others watched her in silence, and the occasional guard stationed here and there mutely nodded to her as they stood diligent at their posts.

The Fantasian strode down several alleys, keeping to herself and just enjoying the scenery. Everything seemed to glow in the sun's rays, reflecting just enough light to betray several colors reflecting off of the many surfaces, but not enough to blind her in its grandeur. It was around mid-afternoon when she passed through one alley that was on the very outskirts of the Empire, only to stop upon hearing an awful lot of clamor coming from her right.

She turned and found a door, with an overhead and gorgeous sign that boasted many colors tacked above its frame, and its small rainbow seemed brighter against the dark blue backdrop of the building it was attached to. "Crystal Berry Tavern," she murmured to herself upon reading the sign, barely hearing something land in a harsh thud. "Why's it in an alley? And what's all that noise?" she pondered, lifting a hoof to open the door and see what the hubbub was about, almost immediately being assaulted by loud shouting coming from all conceivable directions possible.

Natalie had found herself bearing witness to a vicious brawl between three stallions in the center of the tavern, two slender earth ponies and one unicorn with a green mane and orange coat. To either side and the far back, an assortment of other ponies stayed to the walls, all eyes watching as the trio struggled for dominance.

All three were haggard in appearance, with messy coats, unkempt manes, bloodshot eyes, and heavy bags under said eyes. Hooves flew everywhere, and the earth ponies managed to subdue the unicorn who was repeatedly trying to shove them off in a matter of minutes. "Listen here," the burlier of the two earth ponies, one sporting a brown coat, hissed as he and his companion forced the struggling pony's back to the floor. "You ain't hitting on my wife! You ain't touching my wife!"

"I can stick my cock in whoever I please!" the unicorn shouted in a familiar, if slurred, voice. "I stuck my cock in one of the Fantasian diplomats! I'll do it again and then I'll do the same for your lousy whorse of a wife!" Natalie recoiled, both realization and horror hitting her like a freight train, her eyes all but widening at the remark the pinned stallion just uttered.

She steeled herself when the second earth pony, this one with a blue coat, snarled like an animal. "Aren't ya one of those crooks who—" he was cut off as his quarry turned to the door, eyes immediately zeroing in on the tavern's newest arrival. The ponies holding him followed his gaze, frowning when they noticed the mare's presence.

"You!" he hissed, his horn igniting in vicious sparks. Jolts ran rampant throughout the two ponies holding him down, making them scream and collapse in seconds. As soon as they had fallen, the orange unicorn languidly stood up on unsteady hooves, his form swaying like a leaf in a breeze, eyes gleaming with rage.

Natalie averted her eyes to both sides of the tavern, and she noticed that a few ponies who were seated at tables instead of staying close to the walls sat stiff as boards, all eyes watching the unicorn that tried to maintain a steady balance. "How the fuck did you get here, Napkin McSmalldick?" she snapped, her own pair of oculars turning back to the pony who electrocuted two stallions.

Napkin stumbled back at the insult, his eyes widening for the barest of instants. Then he stepped forward, donning a fierce grin, his horn still crackling with sparks just waiting to be set loose on another hapless victim. "I won't give you details, Starcovert," he replied, taking a few more steps forward. "I'll have you pinned and your guts spilled when I am done."

"Come and get me—I'm right here," Natalie huffed with narrowing eyes, lifting one hoof and beckoning him to bring it on. "I'll have you crying in less than ten seconds."

Napkin's grin widened, forming a hellish smirk. He wordlessly surged forward with a snarl, his right hoof outstretching as soon as he was within range of his new target. Natalie summoned a barrier not a moment too soon, watching as her shield took the punch and held firm. Her enemy's horn ignited some more, and it let loose a wicked bolt of lightning that encompassed the red field, mildly shocking her and making it crack simultaneously.

She stood her ground, gritting her teeth to keep cries of agony at bay, eyes narrowing some more as pain shot through her system like a bottle rocket. Another bolt assaulted her barrier, stronger than the last, and the cracks widened and spread in response. She channelled more mana into her horn, waiting for the exact moment when her defensive wall would shatter.

And in seconds, shatter it did. Napkin went on the offensive again, his hoof flying towards Natalie's face as soon as the red shield became little fragments that fell like dead flies, only to scream as a magical retaliation hit him square in the face and sent him flying back before his physical attack could connect. He sailed clean over the earth ponies he shocked earlier, his horn crackling for a few seconds as the world rushed past him and left him at what felt like warp speed.

The other ponies in the tavern gasped as he landed and skid all the way to the back of the establishment belly-up, where a bar and stools had been constructed, the magical assault propelling him all the way to the other side with no break in velocity. The stallion stopped at the bar, his horn snapping in half upon contact with the bar's foot, and he groaned as the attack that firmly clobbered him and made him slide in one go bounced off without inflicting more harm.

He saw it was distinctly star-shaped, looking like a giant golden thing with a hollow center—if anything, it was as if a giant glowing cookie cutter had been converted to ammunition, and it dispersed into little fragments like its caster's shield. One of the stools that was near the bar tipped to one side, only to be grabbed by a blue aura and tilted the other way. It fell, firmly whacking Napkin right on the head, but not hard enough to knock him out.

Napkin lay there completely disoriented, a great big aching sensation settling in his cranium and burning in his backside all the way down to his tail. He lifted his head up, searching for the doorway, grumbling under his breath as he saw the shadow of Natalie still standing there unfazed.

The earth pony duo hauled themselves off of the floor and shook their heads, looking around dazedly as if unaware of what had just happened. Their eyes fell on the Fantasian mare, who simply lifted a hoof and pointed forward. "Look behind you, at the bar," she instructed, and the two turned to find their mumbling sadsack who had yet to realize that half his horn lay next to his left hoof on the gleaming floor.

The brown stallion turned to look at Natalie. "What happened to him?" he asked, using a back hoof to gesture to Napkin.

"Tried punching me with an added dose of shock therapy, so I fired a spell in his face and taught him how to fly," Natalie responded, her shimmer fading a bit. She stepped in the establishment, head darting and eyes searching for anypony who looked alert and bright. Her gaze fell onto a young mare with a gold coat and amethyst mane that sat just a few chairs over from the tavern's entrance. "Could you get a guard, please?" she asked.

The golden-coated mare nodded. "Cer-certainly," she replied in a shaky voice. She got up from her table and trotted over, stopping to eye the tavern's recent arrival from head to hoof. "I'll t-tell them th-that…"

"Natalie Starcovert sent you," Natalie finished for her, garnering another nod before the gold-coated mare bumbled out the door and galloped away, leaving nothing more than the fleeting echo of hoofsteps in her wake.

Napkin tried casting a spell, but pure mana erupted from his horn stump and encompassed him entirely, sending jolt after jolt through his nerves. He screamed in agony, writhing desperately in an attempt to crawl out of his bout of self-inflicted pain, yet each movement only amplified his torment tenfold and kept him glued to the spot. Only as he lost consciousness did the mana holding him dissipate, with nothing more than shallow and raspy breaths leaving his mouth signaling that he was still alive.

Natalie cantered over to the two earth ponies, noticing her limbs were now stiffer than she'd have liked, but ignored it upon seeing some bruises forming on the stallions' bodies. "So… what happened before I showed up?" she asked.

The blue stallion spoke up, "Spanked my brother's wife with a hoof, and called her a slut."

Natalie's brow rose. She turned to the brown pony, who nodded slowly. "And then he tried reaching under her tail, and we both… snapped," he concluded.

Natalie mentally let her hoof connect with her face, but outwardly sighed. "So… he was being stupid?" she asked, garnering nods from the earth ponies before her. She groaned and shook her head, eyes going half-lidded in seconds. "It's to be expected of somepony willing to rape diplomats just because of two hot pieces of flank…"

The two stallions exchanged glances, both fidgeting uncomfortably before they turned back to the mare in front of them. They turned and shambled to a table, hooves dragging as they moved, allowing Natalie to make a beeline for Napkin's out-cold form. Her hooves also dragged, her legs' stiffening lessening as she approached the familiar stallion at a snail's pace.

All the better too, as he started mumbling and moving his head about—a sure sign he was waking. His eyelids fluttered, ears twitching this way and that, his left hoof jutting just enough to barely connect with the hornbit that lay before it, sending it rolling before it stopped at his back knee. "What…" he managed, eyes slowly and fully opening, his vision hazy as a cream-and-red blot swam into view.

"I was able to retaliate this time," Natalie hissed in a low voice as she inched closer to her former tormentor. Napkin blinked a few times, and each consecutive blink cleared his foggy sight until it was crystal clear, and they widened as he realized just who was closing in on him. He made to cast another spell, but ceased entirely when his enemy stopped her advance and added, "I wouldn't advise that. Look past your left hoof; you'll see what I am talking about."

Napkin did as instructed, and he gaped upon spotting half his horn on the floor, a jagged break-off point at one end signaling that it hadn't been removed cleanly. He turned to Natalie and shoved the stool that landed on him away from his form, noticing that his target still stood some feet away. His eyes narrowed coldly at her lingering presence. "You… bitch," he seethed, rolling on his stomach in an attempt to start hauling himself from the floor.

"I thought you despised crude language, or is my memory failing me?" Natalie growled, though her inquiry did not halt the stallion's movements at all. If anything, he moved faster, working every fiber in his body in an effort to stand.

When he hauled himself up, he turned to her slowly, a deadly gleam in his eyes. "Listen here, you cunttastic whorse," Napkin began, his brow furrowing. "I'll—"

"I'm not a whorse. And even if I was, I'm not your whorse," Natalie cut him off, her horn starting to glow again. Napkin snarled and lunged, but another earth pony stallion with a teal coat and an apron lunged from behind the bar, tackling the unicorn to the ground before he could close the distance between himself and his quarry.

"Look here, miserable shit-stained vagrant," the teal stallion snarled, locking eyes with Napkin the entire time he spoke, "you caused trouble here. You aren't welcome—in fact, you overstayed. I don't know how you got past the guards, but you ain't slipping from them this time." He turned to Natalie and added, "Lass, you may as well take a seat. I'll hold him 'till the guards show up."

Natalie nodded, and trotted up to the bar, and slowly the other guests sans two went to the empty tables and filled them up. Others came up to the bar, with a stallion or two sitting at the ends thereof. She claimed one of the stools for herself and sighed, turning to a unicorn mare sporting a light grey coat and an apron who stood in front of the various glasses and alcohols that looked back with wide eyes. "Ya want something?" the apron-wearing mare asked.

Natalie's horn flared in light, and next to her in a burst of glowing mana, a small bag of bits materialized and plopped on the bar. "Strongest and sweetest drink you have available, ma'am," she replied, frowning.

The apron-wearing pony's pupils instantly shrank. "You asking for the… the…" Words died in her throat, and she looked around to find that the other patrons had all turned their heads to Natalie with wide-eyed, slack-jawed looks painting the faces of the entire lot. "The Gleaming Cornucopia?"

"If that's your strongest and sweetest, then I'm all for it," Natalie replied like it was a casual thing, waving a hoof dismissively before gesturing to the bag of bits. "How much do a few glasses cost?"

"For a bundle? Running around fifteen bits per glass," the stallion holding Napkin piped up, garnering a look from Natalie. He looked at her and added, "So few ponies ask for the stuff just because it's as strong as tartarus—not many got the livers or the stomachs to be able to hold it." When Napkin shifted in an attempt to get away, he wrapped a foreleg around his neck and squeezed firmly, but not firmly enough to start choking him.

Natalie nodded, and opened the small pouch to start counting the bits within. "I have enough in here… for twenty glasses," she said as soon as she finished counting.

The mare behind the bar paled. "T-twenty?" she stammered, her ears falling against her head. "Y-you sure?"

"Definitely," Natalie chirped in reply, using her magic to hand the apron-wearing mare the bag of bits. The mare just stared at the Fantasian, flabbergasted and stiff as a statue, her eyes darting between her guest and the bag of bits. Hesitantly, she took the pouch of money and swallowed thickly before setting it aside and turning to the myriad of cocktails and glasses behind her.

The apron-wearing mare sighed and let her horn glow a soft orange, her magic embracing no less than ten different bottles and lifting them off the shelves with ease. She also grabbed a red cocktail shaker from another shelf, prior to turning around and setting that and the ingredients on the bar. Next, she grabbed a small wine glass, one that gleamed with a faint rainbow sheen before unscrewing the shaker's lid open.

Natalie watched as, one after the other, the different brews were opened and added into the contraption as the unicorn behind the bar eyeballed the measurements. She also noticed that each bottle had a different-colored liquid, and some part of her wondered whether or not the resulting concoction would be some sickly color or smell bad. One of the grey stallions at the far end scooted closer to Natalie, and when he was within range he nudged her with a hoof to get her attention.

"Why'd you order the strong shit?" he asked in a low, slurred whisper. "You'll get drunker than everypony else at this rate."

"That's my plan," Natalie whispered back, using a hoof to gesture to Napkin. "See that fucker? That fucker bound me like a rocking horse. That fucker plunged his tiny pecker up my ass. I want to get drunk to wash his face out of my mind—consider the strongest shit my personal variety of brain bleach."

The stallion's eyes widened. "You kiddin'," he replied.

Natalie shook her head. "Am not, sadly," she retorted. "Ever read the newspaper?" She groaned when the stallion shook his head, and turned to find that seven of ten bottles had some of their contents poured in the shaker during her little chit-chat with the stranger.

When the remaining three of ten bottles had some of their contents added to the shaker, the mare before her guest reached beneath the bar and pulled out an eleventh bottle that contained a liquid that sloshed in seven colors, and no matter how much she shook the damned thing the colors simply would not mix. "What's that?" Natalie asked, gesturing to the eleventh bottle.

"Liquified Cloudsdale rainbows—premium stuff," the apron-wearing unicorn replied, opening the bottle and pouring a very small amount, no more than a tablespoon, into the shaker. She closed the bottles and put them up where she had found them and asked, "Cold, hot, shaken, stirred?"

"Cold, and shaken, please," Natalie replied, watching as the mare who was making her drink shuddered at the withers. She heard solid objects clink as her drink-maker slightly bowed under the bar to fumble for something, and came up with a small batch of ice cubes, each one large enough to hold a slice of different fruits within. The frozen fruits were added and the cap was screwed onto the shaker, before orange-tinted magic lifted it in the air and shook vigorously.

After a minute of shaking, the canister opened, and a multi-hued liquid with bits of ice and fruit found itself in the small wine glass. "One… Gleaming Cornucopia," the apron-wearing mare announced, gently pushing the glass to Natalie without spilling a drop of the drink.

"Thank you," Natalie purred, a small smile on her face. She lifted up the glass with a hoof and took a whiff of the drink, humming as a strong fruity smell assaulted her nostrils full force. She moved the rim to her lips and took a sip, and as soon as a minute amount graced her tastebuds, a rush of different flavors exploded in her mouth that was amplified by the excruciatingly bitter taste of pure alcohol.

She set the glass down, letting the flavors mingle for a few seconds before swallowing and slowly nodding. "Great merciful Godcat on a bicycle, that is strong and sweet," she murmured, her smile widening. "This is wonderful!" With that, she took another sip of her glass, this one drawing out more liquid from the container, but before she could swallow a set of hooves echoed into the tavern from behind.

"He fought a mare and lost?" asked a masculine voice that echoed into the building, and when the owner spoke, the tone nearly caused Natalie to choke on her drink. She turned around to find none other than Shining Armor himself as he entered the establishment. "I heard there was a wanted stallion in these premises. Where is he?" he asked, his face set in a firm glare that made the entire tavern go still.

"Right here," the stallion holding Napkin answered. "Shocked two of my patrons, and tried hitting a third, who cast some kind of star-like spell in self-defense."

"Horseshit!" Napkin cried, and he began wiggling to get free. The leg around his neck tightened its grip, forcing him to cease again. "I was defending myself, Captain…" Words died in his throat as Shining came closer, his eyes widening as he realized that he just attempted to fib to the one stallion that wouldn't buy it.

"I have several witnesses that can say otherwise," Natalie piped up after swallowing what was in her mouth, a faint red painting her cheeks. She ignored the wide-eyed, desperate look that Napkin sent her way, instead taking another hefty swig out of her glass and swallowing it in one go. "My guess as to how he got here? Either shock therapy, or illusions."

"I-I don't know illusion magic! I don't know what you're talking about!" Napkin hissed, the stump of his horn glowing once again. An anvil, no larger than his head, materialized in the air and landed on the bridge of his muzzle before catapulting off. The anvil landed just shy of Shining's hooves, and the owner of said hooves made to touch it—only to find that his limb harmlessly phased through the object.

Shining shook his head and looked at Napkin with narrowed eyes and a tight frown. "How many lies is that, now? Twenty?" he asked in a low voice.

"I-I haven't lied!" Napkin shouted defensively, garnering another shake of the head from the Emperor whose Empire he was trespassing in.

"And that's twenty-one…" Shining mumbled, raising a hoof and letting it connect with his face.