Every good story contains many first experiences. A character doesn’t learn anything unless they try new things and see the world in a different way. In keeping with this, my story truly begins with my first kill.

But I can’t simply start there. You need to know why I killed. And for that, I’ll pick up where I left off.

My parents named me Ebonmane. I suppose they chose an entirely un-extraordinary name for their alicorn son in an attempt to balance me out. Most ponies are named something far more interesting, but I was christened by my black mane. I suppose it contrasted with my white body in a particularly stark fashion, but my mane really isn’t anything special. It’s just my namesake.

I grew up in a stable home. Two parents, a unicorn brother ahead of me and an earth pony brother after me. My mother was a unicorn, my father an earth pony. My brothers and I were the Second Generation, my parents the First, the original Survivors. They had been through the pegasus Enclave’s Friendship City attack while they were engaged and found refuge in Junction Town, where I was raised. They had always been a little wary about the pegasi who came to live in Junction Town after Littlepip cleared the cloud curtain, but in time they grew to trust them.

My mother was quite the historian. I was raised on stories of the past, and adventure. Every foal had a favorite Ministry Mare, I happened to like Twilight Sparkle, but I particularly latched onto stories of her brother, Shining Armor, and his beloved wife, the Princess Cadence. I believe that he resonated with me more than the mares simply because he was a stallion, and from a young age I viewed him as an idealized role model. My head was filled with visions and ideas of bravery and chivalry, and I internalized the code of honor that he stood for. I grew up believing in the absolute power of love, and that someday I would have to fight to defend it.

In a world still tinged with everyday violence, I was not a terribly aggressive colt. I never gave up my beliefs in fighting the good fight, but the figures that I idolized always advocated nonviolence and mercy first, and used violence only as a last resort. This suited me. I was quiet from the day of my birth. As a foal, I knew I had some loud, obnoxious phases, but even then I was shy around strangers. I was a reader, an intellectual, and more honestly a bit of a nerd, and I never found my place among the bulk of colts my age, who were quite physical. It’s worth mentioning that my build had always been very lean, and quite tall, but not terribly strong. If I was built for anything, it was endurance, and I would come to rely on that.

I wasn’t an outcast, however. Despite my differences with other colts, I was likeable enough, and had friends and enemies like anyone else. Only on rare occasions was I ever reminded that being an alicorn made me different from others. Traders would come to town and ask my parents if I was adopted. Teachers would discuss the Princesses, stressing that their status as alicorns was not like the alicorns that were our classmates. When this was said, I could sometimes catch them stealing a glimpse at me.

I received my cutie mark in a rather mundane way. The parents of Junction Town had decided by a wide majority that foals under a certain age should not be allowed to read or listen to The Book of Littlepip due to the extreme graphic violence, instances of rape, and other sexual events that occurred over the course of the story. Once a foal reached the agreed age, however, they were highly encouraged to read it. In a way it was kind of a rite of passage. When I asked about the story, about who Littlepip was, my parents always told me that we owed her our lives, and that she watched over us and could see us wherever we went and hear what we said. Foals were encouraged to talk to her. As revered as she was, when I learned of her, I began to suspect that she might be an even greater hero than Shining Armor. I burned with the desire to read the book, and my older brother, Seacliff, described it as a masterpiece of literature when he got to read it.

I received my cutie mark the moment I closed the back cover, a black bishop chess piece. Reading the book had taken me a long time, and I had been forced to confront evils and question truths that I hardly knew existed. Unlike others, though, who had some inclination of what their cutie marks meant through the event of receiving them, I was left clueless.

Despite my confusion about the black bishop on my flank, I took solace in it. Littlepip hadn’t known what hers meant either.

I received a sword for my last birthday in Junction Town. I was old enough to truly be an adult, so I think my parents found it distasteful that Calamity had made me a weapon that most would consider useless in the age of energy weapons, not to mention a gift that was so reminiscent of my childhood delusions of chivalry.

I was thrilled, though. Simple in design, straight and long, it was created with the care and attention to detail that Calamity put into all of his projects. I think some worried that the gift would evoke delusions of grandeur within me, and that I was certain to strike out into the wasteland and get myself killed.

But I’m getting ahead of myself. My first kill occurred in Junction Town, and the sword Calamity gave me ended the life.

I was looking at moving out of my parents’ house at the time, and Ditzy Doo’s business, “Absolutely Everything,” had grown to encompass enough to be worthy of the title since her time with Littlepip, including some small shacks that were being politely sold as “apartments.” As a young stallion whose cap income wasn’t too stable, it was really all I could afford. But everyone liked Ditzy Doo, and I knew she wouldn’t leave me with a total hole in the ground. She had always been kind to me, and as a foal had often given me free candy when I went to her store with my parents. This had been the beginning of my sweet tooth.

After I received the sword, I had asked Calamity for a position on the town watch. The watch of Junction Town mostly handled minor disturbances and never had to do much, but it paid a little and I had the attitude for helping others. Calamity, for whatever reason, was hesitant to give it to me, so I appealed to Velvet Remedy and she helped me convince him. My brothers and I had always been favorites of her, and I was arguably the most creative of us, and I had grown to see her as an aunt.

This was why I carried my sword with me into “Absolutely Everything” that day. As a watchpony, we all were very lightly armed in case something should happen. Silver Bell, who was a fair bit older than me, but not outside my generation, was working the counter.

“Hey!” she greeted me cheerfully. I must admit that the purple mare was attractive when she smiled, and she smiled quite often. A trait she learned from her adopted mother, Ditzy. “You’re here to see mom?” I told her I was. She must have known about the apartments. “She’s in the kitchen. Just a moment.” I could see Silver Bell trot off through the doorway behind the counter into the living room and disappear into the kitchen.

I waited for more than a moment. I wasn’t given to impatience, and normally I would have waited for much longer without a twinge of complaint. But I had recently been appointed as a watch, and I was very aware of the weight of the sword that was strapped between my folded wings. If it wasn’t for these factors, I would have never been receptive to any hints of danger.

Silver Bell had taken longer than a moment. I had seen her walk into the kitchen and she should have been right out. Was something wrong? If I hadn’t been a watch, I would have stood and waited. But I was a watch, and I felt it was my responsibility to at least check it out.

I strode behind the counter, my ears straining for sound, but I heard no voices. It was well known that Ditzy was mute, but I didn’t even hear the sound of chalk on the chalkboard that the ghoul carried with her around her neck.

My mind raced with worst-case scenarios. Had something been stolen? Had Ditzy disappeared? Had a group of raiders somehow snuck into town, broke into the shop, and were threatening the lives of these two mares?

The truth was worse than anything my mind could have imagined.

Silver Bell was standing at the entrance to the kitchen, and I could see the decrepit ghoul that was Ditzy Doo standing by the sink. Both seemed to be standing perfectly still, Silver Bell tense, worried.

“Mom?” she said in a small, scared voice.

Ditzy Doo turned her head slowly to look at her daughter, the usual smile on her squishy face replaced by a horrible grimace. A sound gurgled from her throat that was definitely unnatural, even for a ghoul.

I wrapped my blue magic field around my sword and drew it on instinct, the steel scraping against the sheath. Maybe it was the sound that agitated her. Maybe she could have been saved if we had both just backed away slowly. But it was clear that the ghoul had lost herself, as all ghouls do eventually. She had become a zombie.

In the instant my sword was free Ditzy pounced. It took one swing, and no thought, for me to remove her head from her shoulders.

Silver Bell screamed, and once Ditzy Doo lay on the kitchen floor, headless and motionless, Silver Bell went to her. “Mom!” she shouted, tears forming in her eyes.

My breathing was heavy and shaky, and I felt numb from head to toe. I had killed Ditzy Doo, the element of laughter. I slowly approached the body, looking over the bent form of Silver Bell, trying to face what I had done.

I saw Ditzy’s chalkboard on the table. It read, “Run, dear. Mommy loves you.”

Still shaken up, I took Silver Bell to see Calamity and Velvet Remedy. As captain of the watch, I was obliged to tell him about what happened, but I knew Velvet could help Silver deal with the loss. And I knew she could help me work through my feelings too.

Velvet took Silver Bell into another room immediately for rest while Calamity asked me about what had happened. Once I had told him everything, the cyborg pegasus simply left. I think he realized that I needed a moment.

I’m not a crier. I don’t say that in a display of machismo, but as a fact. Many times in my life have I felt like crying but the tears wouldn’t come, no matter how real the sorrow was. This was not one of those times. I cried like a foal.

I heard Velvet’s light hoofbeats against the floorboards, the graceful gait of a stage performer, and I tried to pull myself together once she entered.

I looked up at her, and she shook her head in pity. “Oh, Ebonmane. You poor thing.” She sat down on the sofa next to me and wrapped me in a warm, sympathetic embrace. “I don’t think any of us expected that you’d really have to do something like this. You’ve always been so sweet.”

“Was it this bad for you?” I asked her. “When you were with Littlepip?”

The charcoal unicorn drew away from me. I had dug up memories that she had seemingly buried so long ago. “My first one was, yes,” she started. “So I know how you feel. And as much as it hurt, I’m sure you remember when I learned that sometimes it’s necessary to protect others.” I recalled The Book of Littlepip, and remembered the sprees Velvet had gone on with her combat shotgun. It was hard to believe that the aging mare next to me was such a badass, but the gravity of her expression, her memories, made me feel very small.

“Don’t blame yourself,” she told me. “Even Silver Bell says she knew that old Ditzy Doo might lose it at any given moment. We just were all just hoping that it never would come.”

I gave a shuddering breath, attempting to release myself of my emotions. “It’s one thing to kill raiders or slavers,” I said. “But this is Ditzy Doo. Everypony loves her.”

Velvet Remedy turned to me and fixed me in the terribly fiery gaze of her sky blue eyes. “Listen to me. That wasn’t Ditzy. That was a zombie. Ditzy would have never attacked Silver Bell like that. You did the right thing. Do you hear me?”

I turned away before I nodded. Velvet sighed. “I think Silver Bell’s asleep. Do you need a moment? Or do you need me to stick around?”

I’m sure she had a lot to say to her husband, and I had always dealt with my problems in solitude. “I just need to be alone for a bit.” Velvet nodded understandingly and left. All I could do at that moment was lie down on her couch, but I couldn’t sleep. I just replayed what Velvet had said to me. That it wasn’t my fault. That there was nothing I could have done.

After an hour or so, my family showed up at Calamity’s house. I guess word got out quickly about what had happened, especially when I had led a sobbing Silver Bell out of “Absolutely Everything,” and they greeted me with concern. Seacliff had moved to New Appleloosa last year, so it was just my parents and my younger brother, whose name was Stonestar. They asked me if I was alright and what had happened, and I was forced to tell them the entire story all over again, after I had just told Calamity. Velvet went about offering hot beverages or food, giving me looks that said, “Just say the word and I’ll make them leave.” I let my family stay, even though I wasn’t in the mood to talk about it. Velvet could be so understanding.

Everypony stopped what they were doing when Silver Bell walked into the room. It seemed so hard to believe that she had given me such a charming smile when I walked into “Absolutely Everything” this morning. She seemed so worn down. So defeated. But when she closed her eyes, took a breath, and sat down next to me, I could still see flickers of hope. We were all relieved to see she was up and moving, to see that she was okay.

There was a long silence. I don’t know why she chose to reveal herself to my family, or why she sat next to me, and we all sat in puzzlement, not wanting to discuss the tragedy in front of her.

Finally, Calamity broke the silence. “Are ya hungry? Yer welcome to stay fer dinner.” She shook her head. Calamity moved hesitantly to his next offer. “Ah can walk ya home, if ya like.” She shook her head again.

In a soft, gentle voice, she spoke. “I don’t want to go home.”

Velvet answered her. “Where will you live?”

“I’ve been thinking about that,” she replied, launching into her plan. “I can’t go back to ‘Absolutely Everything.’ It would just make me think of Mom, and she wouldn’t want that. Even this town…” she took a deep breath. “If I’m going to feel better, I can’t stay here. I was thinking about going to New Appleloosa, and maybe setting up another ‘Absolutely Everything’ like Mom did all that time ago.”

Velvet went to her, putting a hoof on her leg. “Are you sure? Leaving behind all your friends and… New Appleloosa isn’t as safe as Junction Town.”

Silver Bell nodded. “Now that Mom’s gone, I think it’s what she would have wanted. For me to be on my own. To make my own life. It’s… it really is a good time. And plus, Dad said he was in that area, so I can meet up with him and tell him the news. He’d want to hear it from me.” By Dad, she meant Lion Heart. Sweet Celestia, I had almost forgotten about the quiet ghoul stallion. I hoped I wouldn’t have to face him. He had been such a hero alongside Littlepip, and even now he held an aura of respect and reverence from me. If he knew what I had done, I was certain he would never forgive me. But I vowed to ask for his forgiveness one day.

I had to agree with Silver Bell’s decision, though. She was young, pretty… she had so much promise. So much ahead of her. I felt for her plight, and smiled at her courage.

“Ya can’t go alone,” Calamity said. “The road to New Appleloosa ain’t too bad these days, but Ah can take ya.”

“I’ll go,” I piped up. “It’s a couple days’ walk to New Appleloosa, and you shouldn’t have to drop everything for this.”

“What about you?” my mother asked. “You can’t go alone, either.”

“I’ll be fine. It’s like Calamity said, the roads aren’t that dangerous now. It’s just a precaution for her. And besides, I can visit Seacliff and maybe find someplace to live.” I knew that, despite my parents’ worries, the prospect of me getting out of the house and having independence would sell it to them. “I can leave whenever Silver Bell’s ready,” I told them.

“I’d like to go tomorrow,” she said. “We can take tonight to pack.”

It was settled. My parents worried and my little brother who had always been attached to me and Seacliff, was sad to see me go, but Silver Bell needed an escort, and they knew that this would be good for me.

And so my first kill would lead to my first adventure.

Calamity had told me to check in with him before I went to pick up Silver Bell. I knocked and was greeted by Velvet. Calamity waited inside.

Velvet, either by matronly instinct or adventurer’s know-how, gave me quite a run-down. “Do you have everything? Are your saddlebags too heavy? Make sure you take breaks, especially during the hottest parts of the day. Go at Silver Bell’s pace; it’s better to get there later than in poor condition. Don’t forget to set up camp away from the road. Do you know a firemaking spell?”

“No,” I answered. “You know that.” My only spell was levitation. At first this was a source of embarrassment for me, but after reading The Book of Littlepip, I took it as another point of comparison and comfort.

She huffed at me, and Calamity’s voice sounded behind her. “Don’t get all frazzled, darlin’. Pip did just fine with one spell.”

“That she did,” Velvet agreed solemnly, turning to him.

“Got somethin’ for ya,” Calamity said. He drew a pistol from a bag he carried.

Velvet Remedy scoffed at him. “You’re giving him that?”

He knickered at her. “And what’s wrong with it?”

“He’s going alone with Silver Bell! Go and get the good guns.”

“The good guns?”

Velvet let out a noise of frustration and left, retreating into their home to get “the good guns.” “I made this ‘un mahself,” Calamity informed me.

“Seems fine to me,” I agreed. Now that things were awkward enough, I began to wonder what was taking Velvet Remedy so long. Eventually she reappeared with a belt in her mouth. Two black pistols hung in holsters on the belt. I recognized them almost immediately, even though I had never seen them before.

“Are those… Reggie Grimfeather’s?” I asked tentatively.

“They are,” Calamity said. “She dropped ‘em off fer repair months ago and hasn’t come back fer ‘em yet. I don’t think she’d mind if you took ‘em. And one more thing.” Calamity reached into his bag again, pulling out a heavy, round object. “Ya can’t even imagine how long it took me to build this. I’m givin’ it to you to test it. Tell me how it works.”

I took the guns and PipBuck reverently. They were sending me out with quite an arsenal. After reading The Book of Littlepip, I knew exactly how useful PipBucks could be. An inventory sorter, medicine dispenser, mapping spell, not to mention the incredibly useful Eyes Forward Sparkle heads-up display and the legendary SATS targeting spell was enough to turn one pony, like Littlepip, into an ultimate survivor. Not to mention I would be vastly better armed than any rogue raider I might meet on the road.

“Now Ah know I don’t have to tell you that these ain’t toys,” Calamity began, “but I will tell ya to take very good care of these.” He stressed his words. “They ain’t gifts. They’re loans. Got it? I expect ‘em back.”

I nodded.

“One more thing,” Velvet Remedy said, drawing close to me, violating my personal space. “It’s going to be just you and Silver Bell out there. I know you’re a nice colt, but the moment you so much as dare to even think about laying a hoof on her, Celestia have mercy on your soul, because I will not. Understand?”

I nodded again. It was all I could do.

“Good.” And suddenly she was back to her kind, motherly self. “Have you said goodbye to your family yet?” I had. “Well then,” she said finally. “I guess it’s off you go. Good luck. Come back soon and tell us all about it.”

As I left, it felt strange to me that everypony seemed so very worried. I know it was just the two of us, and we had virtually no real combat experience between the two of us, and that it was a rather long trip, but things were safer now. There hadn’t been any raider near Junction Town in years, and New Appleloosa was just as strong a city as Junction Town. Didn’t they trust their own security? Didn’t they trust me?

Calamity had ran out the door towards me. “Ah almost forgot,” he said. “Ah sent a message ahead to the sheriff of New Appleloosa. He said he’d send somepony out to meet ya halfway.”

I guess that answered my question.

It occurred to me as we were leaving Junction Town that Silver Bell had seen a lot more of the wasteland than I had. I was curious about her experiences, but knew better to ask her. After The Book of Littlepip had been published, and all of her childhood traumas had been laid bare, she had refused to talk to anyone about her past. Now that Ditzy Doo had died, I felt obliged to offer some kind of understanding, but I wasn’t sure how, so I remained silent.

I had never really left Junction Town. There had been no need. All I knew about the wasteland came from Littlepip, so when I saw the singular blades of grass along the way, who knows where the seeds came from, and the blue sky above, clear save for Celestia’s sun, I was taken aback. Of course, the terrain itself was still ultimately barren and jagged, rock formations jutting up like teeth amongst the hills, but it seemed more natural. Littlepip must have been happy to see that the wasteland was no longer the nightmarish, soul-devouring plain of death that she had trudged across.

“Have you ever left Junction Town?” Silver Bell asked me.

“No,” I admitted. “I have to say, I’m excited to see what New Appleloosa will be like.”

“I think you’d like it,” she replied. “It’s… exciting,” she concluded. “There’s a lot to do if you know where to look.”

“You should show me around once we get there,” I offered. At the time, I felt so smooth.

“Well, it’s a lot different since I was last there,” she backpedaled. “You should ask your brother.”

“Of course,” I said. Shot down, but I wasn’t so easily dissuaded by the pretty mare. “By the way, if you need a place to stay while you’re looking for your own, I’m sure Seacliff could put you up for a few days. I’m staying with him while I look for someplace, too.”

“Actually, that would be a big help. Are you sure he wouldn’t mind?”

“Not at all, especially if it’s for me and for Ditzy Doo’s daughter.” I realized I made a mistake as soon as the words slipped out of my mouth. Silver Bell acknowledged the sentiment, but the reminder of her mother still drew a cloud over her mood.

I tried to cheer her up. “Wanna hear a joke?”

“A joke?” she asked witheringly.

“How many earth ponies does it take to uncap a Sparkle Cola?”

She looked at me incredulously. “How many?” she asked anyway.

“One, but he won’t get the cap until a few days after he opens it.”

It took her a moment to get the joke. “That’s disgusting!” she said with a grand smile and a hint of blush. She responded with her own joke. “Why were alicorns only mares?”

She chose this joke on purpose. I gave a doubtful smile and asked, “Why?”

“Because they were already horny bastards with their heads in the clouds.”

I gave a shocked laugh. “Are you trying to say something?”

I think she was a little embarrassed. “No. It’s just the first joke I thought of.”

“Well, at least this it’ll be an interesting two days.”

We talked a lot about ourselves for the rest of the day, plodding along the dusty road that cut through the stony wilderness. I did most of the talking, because it soon became apparent that Littlepip had told me a lot about her already. She listened well enough, but when we compared experiences, I felt so much younger than her. She had seen hell and more, and I was still a colt by comparison. Maybe Calamity should have given her the good guns.

After a whole day, we hadn’t seen another soul on the worn path we took, but we still headed off a ways once the sun began to set, making camp by a big boulder. Silver Bell made the fire and instructed me how. I felt a little embarrassed that I couldn’t even make a fire, but I took her lessons gladly. After all, I might need them someday and it would be silly if my inability to even make fire would keep me from survival.

We ate dried fruit from our saddlebags for dinner, sitting next to each other around the fire. I had told Silver Bell about the group Calamity had sent for. “When do you think they’ll be here?” she asked.

“Tonight or next morning, depending on how they’re moving,” I said.

She nodded and batted her eyes sleepily. It had been a long walk for two ponies who weren’t use to travelling long distances on foot. “I’ll sleep over there,” I said, moving around to the other side of the boulder so that she could have the fire and some privacy. She nodded in thanks, and I lay down. The ground was colder here, but I reminded myself that my mother hadn’t died recently.

There was so much that I would have liked to say to Silver Bell, but I knew we weren’t close enough for me to offer any kind of comfort. We weren’t quite friends yet, but the fact that I had been the one to put down her mother drew us closer than we normally would be, but at the same time put so much strain on whatever friendship we had. I wanted to apologize, but I don’t think anything I said could have been good enough. I wanted to go around the rock to check on her, but I knew better. If she was upset, she would prefer to be alone than to have me there. I sighed and tried to go to sleep. Perhaps the awkwardness would go away with time.

It wasn’t easy sleeping outside when I was used to a bed. The wind distracted me and the stars and moon seemed so bright. But the weariness of travel overtook me eventually.

That was my first mistake.

I had fallen asleep knowing that the New Appleloosa group might come in the middle of the night, and I slept with one eye open. So when I heard hoofbeats close on me in the dirt, I didn’t suspect any danger.

My eyes snapped open when I heard Silver Bell scream.

There was the sound of a hoof strike, and then a cruel laughter from a group. “She picked a bad day to travel alone,” a mare said.

A stallion answered her. “She’d fetch a good price. She’s cute.”

Another stallion agreed. “I’d fuck her.”

“Easy, Rusty,” the mare said. “At least wait around until I don’t have to see it.”

“Since when do you buy Chain Gang’s whole ‘damaged good’s crap?” the first stallion asked.

“Oh, I don’t give two shits about her,” the mare said. “I just don’t want to be forced to witness Rusty try and get himself laid for once, no matter how brief it would be.”

“Ya wanna test that fer yerself, Nightshade?” Rusty answered the mare.

It seemed that Silver Bell was just unconscious. I couldn’t wield all three of my weapons at the same time, so I decided on a pistol and my sword. My Eyes Forward Sparkle told me there were five of them, even though I only heard three voices. The speakers were close enough where a few quick slashes could end them before they could draw their weapons. After that, I would have to rely on SATS to aim my pistol for me. I didn’t want to trust Silver Bell’s life to my natural accuracy. I knew I was outnumbered, but I had surprise on my side. Littlepip had faced far worse.

I believed I could do this.

Steadying my breath, I turned out from behind the boulder and charged. By the time their heads had turned to face their attacker, my blade was cutting into the unnamed stallion who was talking to Rusty. I could see each of the raiders was wearing suits of makeshift armor made of scraps of metal and leather. It wasn’t too strong, but it took me two of the three swings I had allotted myself to bring him down. The earth pony fell before he could even cry out.

The mare tried to move away, but I was on the warpath. A fierce stab to the base of the neck tore right through the plating, and she died, her pistol dropping from her unicorn magic.

The stallions in the back were drawing their weapons, and Rusty was charging at me with a beam of wood that was more iron nail than timber. There was no way I could get all three of them with SATS, but I had no choice now.

I pulled up the targeting spell for the first time, and my gun locked onto the targets in the back. I fired three shots at one as he was backing away. The first two missed, and the last clipped him in the shoulder. Definitely not a kill.

My heart began to race. Things were not looking good.

Rusty swung his nail board, but even in my first fight it was all too easy to block with my blade, parry, and run my point through his neck.

As he fell, all I could see were the final two raiders. And now there was nothing between them and me. I could see their weapons. Automatics.

I tried to retreat behind the boulder, and a hail of bullets followed me, many kicking up dust on the rock, and just as many thudding into my side and flank. The force of their impact was incredible as they tore through my unprotected body. With a cry of pain, my legs gave out, and I could feel the fur on my belly wet with blood as my body hit the dirt. My lungs tried to get air into me, but the wind was knocked out of me. I lied still, trying to breathe for the longest time, pain overwhelming my ability to move.

“Where the fuck did he come from?” I heard one ask.

“Forget him. Just grab her and get her to Greaves’. If there’s one, there’s gonna be more.”

Their voices were getting fainter. “What makes you think that?”

“No one’s stupid enough to attack alone.”

Insult to massive injury.

I had packed two healing potions, one for me and one for Silver Bell if needed. My magic had already opened my saddlebags and I brought the potion out.

I worked to uncork the bottle, but my consciousness was fading fast. The stopper loosened, but my strength waned rapidly before I could even bring the mouth to my lips.

Before darkness overcame me, there was a distinct feeling of uselessness. Because of me, my weakness, my inability to even down a healing potion, Silver Bell had been doomed to an unimaginable fate at the hooves of these raiders.

This wasn’t how heroes were supposed to go out. Not on the first fight. Shining Armor, Littlepip, Lion Heart, hell, even Calamity and Velvet should be so disappointed in me.

That’s what I felt when I finally dropped the bottle.

Disappointed in myself.