Dante's Little Apple Surprise

by Tatsurou

Chapter 31: Summer Break 5

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After Applejack had spent most of her time at DWMA in the student dorms, Dante had become much more at ease with letting her go off to school, as long as she came back each summer. So when the time came for her to attend Youkai Academy, he sent her off at the start of each school term with a smile, a wave, a promise that she'd return for summer, and parental fretting and worry the moment the warp spell finished. Admittedly, letters were sent back and forth, but it wasn't the same as sitting down every night together for a meal...and even with magical assistance, it was rather difficult and awkward to mail a reassuring hug or a kiss goodnight.

Applejack seemed to handle the situation a lot better than Dante did, though, as none of her letters showed the least bit of stress or separation anxiety. That was probably because Dante had insisted she take Sparda with her, which meant she had a bit of her entire family's demonic aura within reach at all times. Even when her letters mentioned some of the male students trying to make trouble for her in the student dorms, it was written with amusement rather than anger or fear.

Then again, the fact that the average power level of her fellow students was less than that of her familiar at full strength might have had something to do with that. It's a little hard to be scared of somebody when 'sic em' calls in someone stronger.

Virgil, however, was less sanguine about the situation for a number of reasons. First off, Dante became unbearable to be around when Applejack was away. His constant worry over whether she was doing alright, whether the work was too hard, whether she had a boyfriend now, whether she was going to come home with a tattoo and an unexpected baby and a broken heart... If Virgil had to hear that particular tirade again, he was going to start challenging Dante to sparring sessions if only to get his mind off it.

Secondly, Dante was not nearly as good a cook as he thought he was. With no one present able to cook worth a damn - the only ones who could were Applejack and Nevan, Trish and Lady were hopeless in the kitchen - most meals were take out or delivery, making meal time much more unpleasant...especially since Dante moped about how much he missed Applejack's cooking with every other bite.

Admittedly, Dante had been helpful with tracking down Nero. Between their two different strategies, they actually had a good idea finally about where to look, and were beginning to make a plan as to how to address the issue.

As they were laying down the plan, the warp circle appeared and Applejack took shape in her pony form, her Devil Arms on her body and her head hanging.

"Applejack!" Dante called happily. "Did you graduate already?"

"...no," Applejack replied sadly.

"No?" Virgil asked. "What happened?"

"I...got expelled," she replied sadly.

"What'd you do to get expelled?" Trish demanded.

"...accidentally blew up the school."

Ifrit snorted. "How'd you manage to 'accidentally' blow up the school?"

"I was trying ta kill a sex crazed super zombie, and I missed and hit the school anchor with Sparda while in Devil Trigger," Applejack replied shamefacedly.

Everyone present glanced at each other. "Yeah, that would do it," Dante replied.

"Perhaps you'd better start at the beginning," Virgil pointed out. "How did this all happen?"

"Well, it all started this year when a human boy accidentally got enrolled, but managed to conceal being human from everyone but me by claiming to be a ghoul," Applejack replied. "He wound up in the newspaper club with a whole buncha girls who all wanted ta jump him."

Dante raised an eyebrow. "Isn't that a little inappropriate for a middle/high school?" he demanded.

"It's Japan," Virgil explained. "It's legal for 13-17 year-olds there to have sex with other 13-17 year olds." As Dante opened his mouth, Virgil countered, "And if you ask why Mom didn't send us there for high school, I'm going to smack you."

Dante frowned. "I was going to demand why you would send Applejack to school some place like that. Especially when you were giving me grief over my worries-"

"Because I know Applejack's responsible enough to not act like that, unlike you," Virgil growled back.

"So, how did this lead to sex crazed zombies and blowing up the school?" Trish asked.

"Well, the worst of the lot was this succubus named Kurumu," Applejack explained. "It was like ah couldn't turn around twice without her flashing her goods. I wouldn'ta minded so much if she kept it to club activities and after school activities...but she was going at it during class, and that disrupted the lessons! And I was in that class!" She grumbled. "One day, after one too many panty flashes, I told her if she was going ta show 'em off that much, she shouldn't bother wearing a skirt, and...tore hers off."

Dante spun from his argument with Virgil, his attention once more fully on Applejack's story. "Skirt or panties?"

"Skirt," Applejack replied, pulling her hat down over her head. "Ah...ah ain't proud a that, but everyone's got their breaking point, ya know? And it was during the final exam!"

Virgil groaned. "So...then what happened?"

"Well..." Applejack shuffled nervously. "Apparently, she was in the middle of trying to cast a spell ta get the boy to go after her the way she wanted in private...but mah tearing her skirt off broke her concentration, the spell went awry...and the school suddenly got swarmed with sex crazed zombies."

"What makes you say they were sex crazed?" Trish asked.

"Cause they seemed a lot more interested in tearin' girls clothes off than biting 'em," Applejack replied. "By the time the teachers responded, half the female student body had suffered major wardrobe malfunctions. While some got bit, that Tsukune fellow was the only human, so the only one in danger o' turnin."

"Except you," Nevan added.

"Yeah...cept fer me," Applejack replied. "Dun know what a zombie bite woulda done ta me. I mean, I'm a pony with artificially transferred demon powers taken on a human form. What's a zombie bite gonna do to that?"

Dante shook his head. "Never happened before, so there's no way of knowing."

"Yeah...and Sparda seemed ta wanna keep me away from the zombies," Applejack replied. "Anyway, I managed to figure out that one of the zombies was the focus of the enchantment, and went after it. But...it started absorbing energy from the school's dimensional anchor and got bigger and stronger, so i had to go all out just ta damage it, and..."

Virgil groaned. "One missed swing and the school goes boom," he sighed.

"Sorry..." Applejack mewled pathetically.

Dante scooped her up. "Not your fault, Applejack," he said comfortingly. "You were just doing like you were trained. It just ended badly."

Virgil sighed. "Maybe sending you to a school that's open about its supernatural population is a bad idea," he pointed out. "I've...got a favor I can call in from an...old acquaintance. Our blood has some pull with people over there. Did you like attending school in Japan?"

Applejack nodded eagerly. "It was fun when the entire school wasn't being warped around the antics of sex crazed girls pursuing a boy."

"Well, last I checked this was an all girls school, so you shouldn't have a problem there," Virgil replied. "We've got a lead on Nero which we should be able to resolve before Summer's end...and after that I'll get you enrolled in Kuoh Academy."

Applejack smiled widely. "Ah heard good things about that place when I was off campus," she said eagerly. "It should be fun. Sides...ah really like how the uniform looks. Real fancy like without bein' impractical."

"But first, we bring Nero back for a family reunion," Dante confirmed.

"Speakin' of," Applejack asked curiously, glancing from Virgil to Trish, "when we meet him, do I introduce Trish as a friend or as his new Ma?"

Both Virgil and Trish glanced away from each other nervously as Dante laughed.

Next Chapter: This is the Weirdest Day... Estimated time remaining: 1 Hour, 56 Minutes
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