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YHaY: The Ballad of Nasty Jack

by Ironwolves21

Chapter 2: Chapter Two: Curiosity Kills

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For the past two days, Flitter had been in a reclusive haze. Most of Ponyville’s residents didn’t question the reason, having assumed it was a byproduct of her brutally close brush with death. Only one pony had any kind of idea what was actually happening. Cloud Chaser landed deftly on the front porch of her cloud home. Quickly pushing through the door, she readjusted her bag and made her way towards her little sister’s room. She took in a deep breath, and knocked lightly on Flitter’s door.

“Flits, it’s me…. I brought you food.” Cloud Chaser listened intently, but no answer came. The mare pursed her lips together, and forced her way through. “Flitter? I’m coming in.” Cloud Chaser trotted into Flitters room, expecting the worst. Instead, she found her little sister buried muzzle deep in a very thick book, and surrounded by her drawings. Flitter was laying on her bed, with her hind legs tucked under her as she read. “Flitter!” Cloud Chaser called out in annoyance.

“Muh?” Flitter looked up from her book, her trance broken. “Cloudy? What’s up?”

Flitters sister’s annoyance only grew. “What’s up!? Flitter, you’ve locked yourself in here for two days! Everypony’s worried sick about you!” Cloud Chaser tromped over, and pulled her bag off her flank. “You haven’t eaten either.” The younger mare smiled at her sister, and took the food she was offered. After eating, she dove back into her book. Cloud Chaser growled, and pulled the book away.

Flitters eyes went wide, and she dove for the book. “Hey, give that back!”

Her older sister simply shook her head, and refused her sister’s grabbing hooves. “No way! This is stupid, Flits! I know what happened must have been scary, but you need to come outside! I’m not letting you do this!” Cloud Chaser was practically screaming now.

To Cloud Chasers surprise, Flitter didn’t back down. “No! I have to do this! I need to understand!” Flitter had jumped off her bed, and was circling around her sister in an attempt to flank her. Cloud Chaser simply defeated her tactic by always holding the book away from her sister as they circled the quaint, poster covered room.

After several minutes of shouting and wrestling, Cloud Chaser saw the desperation in her sister's eyes. Cloud Chaser let out a defeated sigh, and hoofed the book back to her sister. “Why? What are you trying to understand?” She plopped down onto Flitters desk chair.

Flitter smiled broadly, and swiftly gathered her artwork off her bed. She stacked them quickly, and all but shoved the pile into Cloud Chasers muzzle. “This!”

Cloud Chaser blinked, and took the stack of drawings. It was Flitter’s usual kind of artwork, with her usual obsessive attention to detail and flourishes. The drawing itself was of some kind of human, but everything looked off about it. Flitter had somehow drawn the human in a way that seemed to radiate power. Its face was hidden behind some kind of mask that was incredibly…. Alien. Cloud Chaser furrowed her brow. Flitter has a terrible imagination. What the hay is this!? Cloud Chaser glanced through the stack of dozens of other drawings, some of which were very graphic in nature, causing Cloud Chasers stomach to flop. Her eye lingered too long on one particular drawing; one of the human ripping the leg off what looked like an infected human. Feeling the bile rise in her throat, Cloud Chaser shakily tore her gaze away from the drawing. “Flits… What is all of this?”

“Research!” Her sister answered diligently. She carried on, as if knowing the next question. “I was saved by a golem in the woods, but it’s like nothing in any of the books I’ve read.”

“Flitter….”

The mare continued unabated. “I first thought it was a Griffonic Golem, but Griffons have no magical powers! This golem shot magic beams out of its arms, and that put up red flags for me. So I thought, maybe it’s a unicorns golem, but it turns out that Princess Celestia made Golem creation illegal two hundred years ago!” Flitter continued on and on, despite the utterly confused look on Cloud Chasers face.

“Flitter, please…” Cloud Chaser rubbed her own cheek lightly with a hoof.

“-So I thought ‘Maybe it’s an imported golem, or even an illegal one! But it turns out that it’s far more advanced than anything we, or the Griffons could ever make! It’s amazing! I-”

“FLITTER!” Cloud Chaser gripped her younger sibling tightly by the shoulders and shook her violently. Flitter’s eyes went wide and she yelped in surprise. Cloud Chaser eased back her grip on Flitter for fear of hurting her. “Flitter, please… You’re scaring me. I’m… I’m really worried about you.” Cloud Chasers ears had folded against her head, and tears had begun to well up in her eyes.

Carefully removing her sister’s grip, Flitter smiled encouragingly at her older sibling. “I’m okay, Cloudy. I promise that I’m not losing it, like Lyra.” She hugged Cloud Chaser tightly. “If you want, I’ll go out and get some fresh air today.”

Letting out a sigh of relief, Cloud Chaser composed herself and smiled. “Good, you've been making everypony worry about you.” She stepped out of the way, and ushered Flitter towards the door. Cloud Chaser ensured that her younger sibling took off towards Ponyville. Turning back towards her home, Cloud Chaser smiled to herself. Her plan had worked out better than she’d hoped. She then went about making herself presentable for her date later on that night.

Flitter landed near the end of Poplar street; her wings folded up as she started trotting down the street. She trotted merrily towards her favourite place to eat with a light spring in her step. She pulled out her bits sack, and started counting her money as she trotted. Flitter smiled to herself, before putting away her money. The mare started humming quietly as she neared her destination. A couple ponies stared at her as she went, but she should have expected that. Flitter stopped humming, and her smile slowly dimmed the further she went. The ponies were whispering to each other about Her.

“-gerous…” “-killed-” “Just terrible…”

Flitter slouched her shoulders and picked up the pace. Her ears pinned themselves snugly against the side of her head to block out the whispered words. This trip outside had turned out to be a very bad idea. As she neared her destination, somepony abruptly bumped into her, despite the street being fairly empty. Flitter’s hooves shot up in apology anyways. “I’m so sorry! I didn’t see you there!”

The ruddy stallion sneered ever so slightly before turning away. “Just watch where you’re going, Feather Brain.”

Frowning even more, and with tears threatening the corners of her eyes, Flitter barely avoided barreling into Miss Oakenbaulm’s human. She ducked past the older mare as she walked her pet, and with the graces of Celestia, Flitter finally reached Sugar Cube Corner. The doorbell chimed as she pushed inside.

“Hiya! Welcome to Sugar Cube Corner! What can I get for you today, Miss Flitter?” Mr. Cake smiled happily at her as he manned the counter.

Her smile finally made a return as Flitter made her way to the counter. She quickly wiped her eyes with a forehoof. “H-hello Mr. Cake. I uh… I’d like something sweet. Surprise me.” Flitter smiled softly to the stallion, who nodded in turn. Flitter reached for her bits bag, but couldn’t find it. The mares eyes widened slightly, and she started searching for it. “Oh no…. nononono…. I must have-”

“Is something wrong Miss Flitter?” Mr. Cake asked as he set her treat gently down on a plain ceramic plate.

Flitter’s smile had disappeared completely, finding itself replaced again by a sad frown. “I can’t find my bits…. I just checked them on my way here though!” The mare whined quietly. “Sorry Mr. Cake, I… I can’t pay for it. I’ll just go.” Flitter turned towards the door to leave.

Mr. Cake scrunched up his features in thought, before swiveling his head around. “Miss Flitter?” The mare turned around, still saddened by the loss of her bits and her lunch. Mr. Cake smiled in kind earnest. “Listen, I heard that you saved the Crusaders a couple days ago from those nasty infected humans. Take this as a thanks. Those three are adorable, and I’d hate to see any of them get hurt.” He slid the plate over to Flitter, who was now smiling in sincere thanks.

“Thank you Mr. Cake, I’ll pay you back as soon as I can!” Flitter took her snack, and moved towards one of the many empty stalls.

“No need!” Mr. Cake called, before disappearing back into the store’s kitchen.

Taking her seat, Flitter dug into her food with gusto. Despite the snacks Cloud Kicker had brought her, Flitter was starving. As she ate, her gaze wandered outside, and inevitably to the few humans wandering about with their owners. A couple were tied to posts as their owners shopped; not many shops allowed humans inside. They all look so… small. Flitter thought as she observed several in detail. One had been trained so well that it was able to carry groceries. Flitter snorted. It has to be a golem. Humans are just so… Stupid. No human could ever act like that. Humans also don’t laugh, and the golem did. Flitter furrowed her brow in thought. I need to see the golem again. It has to be wandering around Whitetail Woods still.

Flitter sat up, and scarfed down the remains of her food. Her plans for the day had just been set in stone. She got up quickly, and ran out into the open street. Several ponies looked her way, as did some of the younger humans. The mare took off as quickly as possible to avoid any unwanted attention before heading to Whitetail woods. I’m going to find that golem, and prove to myself that it couldn’t possibly be just some stupid human. Then, I’ll prove to everypony else that it exists.

______________________________________________________________

Come on down you furry little shit, daddy wants real meat in his supper tonight!

Jack watched his squirrel trap with antsy anticipation. His hunting trip had turned south, and now he was reliant on this trap for the much needed food. His stomach growled in agreement as he sat crouched under his ad hoc hunting blind, deep within the forest he was trapped in. He cracked a toothy grin as a fat squirrel slowly climbed down, its tiny little nose twitched as it caught the scent of nuts in the open. Having used the last of his trail mix, Jack was heavily invested in his trap. Come on you fat little prick…. Take the nuts…. Take my nuts god dammit!

The squirrel slowly descended towards his clever trap. The furry creature stopped short of the spring, and seemed to take in what it was looking at. Jack grit his teeth openly, and willed it to just go for the nuts he had laid out. To his surprise and disbelief, the squirrel grabbed a tiny rock off the ground, and tossed it into his trap, setting it off. The little creature jumped forward, and snagged the nuts sitting in the now defunct trap. Its victory was short lived however, when an enraged Jack burst from a bush, screaming gibberish at the top of his lungs and cursing it out vulgarly in his head.

"WWRAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!*"

I’M GOING TO KILL YOU, YOU FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT SQUIRREL!! WHEN I CATCH YOU, I’M GOING TO CRAM A STICK UP YOUR ARROGANT ASS!!

Jack opened up with his laser carbine; the low power setting lasers danced around the squirrel, setting the brush on fire. The squirrel squealed in panic, and bolted off with Jack’s nuts in tow. Jack howled in anger, and gave chase like a rabid animal armed with a laser rifle. The squirrel knew the forest, but Jack would never give up with so much on the line.

Over an hour later, Jack sat inside his humble cavern dwelling, with a freshly caught squirrel and its family cooking over an open fire, a sharpened stick crammed up each individual ass. A small pan caught the grease below, which he’d use later for something that required arrogant squirrel grease.

The soldier sat back on his folding cot, and sharpened his mono-edged Ka-bar idly as he waited. His earbuds dangled over his ears, playing music quietly. His cave home was a quaint one. It had rocky accents on the walls, and a few stalactites to bring the room together. Or was it stalagmites? He didn’t know. He’d fastened one of his camouflage tarps up over the entrance, and another was used to create a lean-to for him to sleep under. The boxy fold out solar power collector sat near the entrance so it was hidden by the tarping, but still caught the needed rays. Jack planned on moving it outside and hiding it under camo netting, but that was a job for Future Jack. His watch beeped once quietly. Jack groaned, and proceeded to open up a small container. Pulling a number of small pills from it, he downed them without gusto. Giving his head a shake; he stuck his tongue out in disgust.

His armour stood ready near his bedding, and his exoskeleton and clothes lay in neat piles by the fire so they could dry. He smiled to himself as he pulled the cooked squirrel out of the flames. Before he could eat, a painful shudder ran over his body, and his vision went fuzzy. Shakily setting the cooked rodent down, Jack clutched his head with one hand, and frantically searched his belongings for the cure. Even if he’d been able to speak, it only would have come out as strained hissing and pained groans.

Jack grit his teeth together, and blinked the pained tears from his eyes. Eventually, he found the small steel case he was searching for. Jack frantically pulled it open, and gripped the syringe with his right hand. Without any ceremony or pomp, he lined it up with the pock marked meat of his arm and depressed the plunger. A lurid groan escaped his lips, and Jack found himself slumping slightly as the morphine flooded his system with bliss. His hands returned to normal after a minute, the shaking having finally subsided. Jack shuddered, and ran a hand over his sweaty, shaved head. The only voice in his head was his own. For now.

Eight shots left.

Jack shook his head again, and picked his meal back up. He blinked rapidly, before finally being allowed to chow down. He washed it down with water and crackers before setting to his most important tasks of the day. Fixing his UAV, and finding a way out of the forest. Breaking out the duct tape and tools, Jack set to work.

_____________________________________________________________

Flitter landed in the lakeside clearing; her head swiveled around, surveying the scenery. The town guard had done a stellar job cleaning the area up, returning it to its former glory. But, in her mind’s eye, Flitter could still see how it used to look; and she doubted that she’d ever forget. The mare let out a quiet sigh, before moving over to where the golem had crashed through the trees on its way out. The trail of destruction was surprisingly difficult to find, considering how big the golem had been. Yet, there it was. Flitter swallowed thickly; her ears flicking nervously as she looked over the trail with trepidation. She gave her head a shake and slowly started following the trail that had been blazed through the thick trees.

The trail seemed to go on forever, but it was growing much harder to follow. It was like the golem had suddenly stopped its running, and was now headed in a completely random direction, opposite of it’s original flight path. It also seemed to be avoiding the easy paths, especially the pony-made ones. Flitter felt like she’d been trotting around in circles for hours, but it couldn’t have been that long, no matter how insanely random the tracks were. Despite all the time she’d spent following the trail, she hadn’t found anything to link to the golem, besides the intricate patterns its feet left in the ground. Flitter sighed quietly, before sitting down on a fallen log. A faint buzzing noise filled her ears, and she swatted at whatever bug was circling her head. The buzzing didn’t disappear right away, but it got much fainter, until she could no longer hear it. That must have been a very big bug…. She thought to herself.


Jack sat back down on his cot, and guided the drone through his helmet’s live feed. The quad rotor drone was fast once it’s engines went horizontal, and the range on his receiver was around one hundred and fifty clicks. Jack focused, blocking out the sound of the rippling of the tarp that covered the entrance to his hideaway cave. His fingers twitched and jerked, eliciting the proper commands. The fact he couldn’t use voice commands was irksome. It pissed him off to no end.

The drone buzzed onwards, and nothing but a carpet of trees spread out around it. Jack narrowed his eyes, and set the drone up higher. Off in the distance, somewhere to the supposed North East, was the end of the forest. Jack let out a fulfilled chuckle as he marked the area on his map as ‘Boundary Line’. He pulled the drone around and continued building his local map. Just as he was about to order the UAV back to base, he spotted something odd. Jack cocked his head, and zoomed the UAV’s camera in. No doubt about it, he wasn’t hallucinating again. The UAV had spotted a farm. Jack set the farm as a destination, and ordered the drone to proceed there at full tilt. He leaned forward, even though the helmet just stayed where it was on his head.

The stereotypical red barn and quaint farmhouse rose up out of what he figured for an orchard. He marked it on his map with ‘Cliche Farm’, before piloting the drone into a slow loop in the airspace over the farmstead. Jack kept the drone at a minimal two kilometre distance, and zoomed in with the camera. Right away, he spotted several people milling around, or carrying buckets and headed towards the barn. One of the horses was standing off to the side. It was wearing an old stetson hat. In fact, that was the only clothing he saw. On anybody.

Fuckin weird… But I won’t question the luck of being this close to a nudist ranch.

Jack watched idly as the people filed into the barn. His eyes widened, and he zoomed in again to watch as the horse thing closed the barn doors. His mouth fell open, just as a larger horse dragged a thrashing man over. Without pause, Jack engaged the audio pick up.

“-on Big Mac. Let’s get this over and done with.”

“Eeyup.”

The horses led the man over to an open air stockade, where they strapped him down. Jack stared at the situation intently, not moving or making a sound. The surreal was too much, even for him. He had officially entered the Twilight Zone.

“Pass me that there rod. And make sure ya hold him down this time!”

“Eeyup.”

What…. What the fuck are they doing?

Jack cocked his head and his nose flared in worried anticipation. He sat and watched as the larger horse grabbed an incredibly odd glowing rod. The horse circled around to the human, who’s junk was sitting out in the open. Jack face faded into the mask of incredulous disbelief, before the horrid realization hit him; at the same time, the audio pickup broadcasted the gelding into his ears.

“AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!” Jack screamed in tandem with the man whose balls had just been sheared off without any anesthetic. Jack jerked away with revulsion from the horror show he was victim to watching, accidentally flipping his cot over. The sudden movement of his hands sent the drone up and over itself, doing several loop-de-loop backflips, with Jack stuck along for the ride. Jack flailed his arms, and ordered the UAV to cut feed and return to base. Ripping off his helmet, Jack shakily got to his feet, before almost getting floored by vertigo as his eyes span about in his head.

WHAT THE FUUUUUUCK!?!?!?! WHAT THE FUCKING SHIT FUCK KIND OF CANDY LAND HELL AM I TRAPPED IN!?

“AAAHH!” Jack screamed again as the mental image seared itself into his brain. His lean meat lunch refused to stay down; he soon found himself retching out in the fresh air of the forest.

He came up coughing and sputtering, the horror still etched on his features as his world continued to spin violently. Ever so slowly, his sanity came out of its hiding place, and found an excellent spot to offer a needed statement.

I am in enemy territory. Humans seem to be like slaves, and these fucking horse things cut the balls off anyone who opposes them.

He wiped his chin, before dumping a bottle of water over his face.

I need to get the fuck out of here.

________________________________________________________________

At the sound of the terrible scream, Flitter had frozen in place out of sheer terror. Memory of the lake came rushing back, and her brain had shut down momentarily at the thought of dying horribly, where nopony would ever find her. She was now hiding behind a log, looking about frantically. The scream had come from somewhere very close by. The mare lifted herself up very cautiously, and slowly moved towards the sound. After a mere minute, she found herself staring at a sheer rock face. The scream couldn’t possibly have come from there.

“AAAHH!”

A second scream came from the rock face, causing Flitters wings to spread with fear. This is bad… This is really bad…. Flitter got up from her new hiding place, and took off towards the skies. With tears in her eyes, Flitter took off at high speeds towards her quaint cloud home. In doing so, she failed to see the very man she was looking for stumble out of the seemingly solid rock face and puke his guts out all over the forest floor.

It was probably better that way.

Author's Notes:

Edited 12/05/2016

Next Chapter: Chapter Three: Wartime Necessities Estimated time remaining: 40 Hours, 42 Minutes
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YHaY: The Ballad of Nasty Jack

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