Today was the day

where all fillies and colts,

would get out of their dreams

and awake with a jolt.

"It's Hearth's Warming Day!"

they would say with a shout,

as they fled from their rooms

to scurry about.

They would wake up their parents

their brothers and sisters,

making sure ponies saw

what was left by the Mister.

Mister Santa Hooves of course,

jolliest of ponies

bringer of presents to good foals

and coal to the phonies.

Houses countrywide

began to start up,

as the chill air outside

gave some warmth to their cups.

In Canterlot

the city of nobles,

aristocrats and gossipers

began to grovel.

Knowing full well

nopony liked their beings,

they started filling the streets

caroling and seeing.

In Cloudsdale,

the city of Pegasi,

the local pony population

flew about the sky.

Gathering in

the hovering town square,

they smiled at one another

glad to be there.

There were towns

and cities dotting the land,

but none could come close

to the Ville so grand.

Ponyville was its name,

the residence of Noteworthy,

the other ponies around him,

and the bass-playing mare he'd loved in a hurry.

As one practiced music

and the other was decorating,

they allowed themselves smiles to each other

in silent admiration.

There were other ponies

cooped inside their homes,

with nothing but presents

keeping them from groans.

The promise of gifts

awaited year long,

they opened with fury

singing holiday songs.

Across Ponyville

in an otherwise quiet apple field,

groups of individuals

frolicked with zeal.

The Cutie Mark Crusaders,

dodging about,

screamed in fear

and ducked with a shout.

For ten feet away

nestled high in a tree,

was a reloading owl

Hoodi–

His mask coated with snow,

leaves, and pine,

Vanoss looked left

and shrank back with a whine.

For Lui,

the small and not-so-colt,

brought out his RPG

and put it up to a vote.

"Should I or shouldn't I?"

he asked to below,

the ponies who were warring

stopping their show.

"Yeah!" said Rainbow Dash,

stolen sniper in her hooves,

"Take down that bird,

show him your moves!"

Lui cast his glance leftward,

to a duo relaxing,

talking about nothing but

bananas and taxing.

Wildcat looked up,

a bored stare in his eyes,

as Nogla mimicked him,

fucking some guys.

(Not really,) said Yamsmos,

typing this out,

(Nogla just sucks,

now look at him pout.)

The Unicorn,

now frowning in sadness,

crossed his forelegs

and mumbled some badness.

Across the way

watching with glee

were the other mares:

Twilight, Fluttershy, and Rarity.

Pinkie Pie,

still gone and off on adventure,

had wrote them a letter

to address her absence-ture.

"Hi girls!"

the note had began,

"Sorry I couldn't make it,

I'm wearing a frying pan!"

That was all there was

so the other Main Five,

played in the Acres

engaging in jive.

For a little ways away,

past the drinking Mac,

sat H2O Delirious

and dear Applejack.

The two were conversing

'bout nothin' but apples,

one lamenting,

and the other quite happil

y listening instead

as the mare continued on,

only to stop

as he heard a new song.

His ears propping up,

and his mug lowered down,

Delirious turned,

his lips in a frown.

The other three mares,

with their scarves, boots and hats,

giggled mischievously,

pawing at the snow like cats.

Applejack rolled her eyes,

nudging Delirious' side,

as she looked his way,

and began to chide.

"We should go throw some snowballs,"

she began with a smile,

"sure would make this whole thing

all worth the while."

But Delirious,

forelegs crossed with a frown,

shook his head,

"I'd rather sit down."

"Oh c'mon!" said Sweetie Belle,

trotting close,

"You can't just sit there,

and act like a host!"

"'Like a host?'" asked Delirious,

skeptical as hell,

wondering if the young filly earlier

had stumbled and fell.

"You know!" piped up Scootaloo,

waving her hoof,

"All boring and dumb,

and kind of aloof."

"Why are you so mad?" asked Apple Bloom

with a skyward brow,

"It's Hearth's Warming Day,

Ah'm just wonderin' how."

"I fucking hate Christmas,"

said Delirious with a sneer.

"Well Ah fuckin' hate you,"

said Mac, who was near.

"The air is too cold,

and I don't like the snow.

Presents are boring,

and Santa's a ho."

"But there's friends and hot cocoa!"

"An' snowball fights!"

"There's no time for moping,

but there's lots for light!"

"But it's mostly night during winter,"

Delirious replied with doubt,

"Just because you're horses

doesn't mean that that's out."

"Celestia compensates,"

Applejack replied,

"Luna is sleeping,

drunk on french fries."

Delirious scoffed,

"Oh how would you know?"

"Ah watch everypony," she replied,

"now get up an' go!"

Slapping his side,

and eliciting a shout,

Applejack grinned,

as Delirious spun about.

Rolling his eyes,

he looked for his friends,

finding on the ground

Vanoss, at his end.

Lui, still laughing,

holstered his gun,

jumped down the tree,

and broke into a run.

Vanoss, respawning,

could only yelp,

as Lui threw a punch,

stowing his call for help.

Nogla and Wildcat,

now walking around,

sat on their rumps,

making dumb sounds.

Drinking from wood mugs,

filled with sparkling cider,

they cheered for their young friend,

and booed at the hider.

Vanoss, proclaiming,

"Mass bullshit,"

raised his hooves up

and said, "I quit!"

Lui, chuckling,

his cigar aflame,

kindly walked off,

satisfied with their game.

The whole pony group,

now smiling at each other,

gathered into a circle,

embracing like child and mother.

Vanoss, Wildcat,

Lui and Nogla,

raised their brows,

not walking over.

Twilight Sparkle,

her wings by her sides,

poked her head out,

shouting, "Get over here, guys!"

The four exchanged looks

with Delirious who said,

"Ain't my choice,

I'd rather be dead."

The four agreed

with their blue friend's comment,

then stopped and squirmed

trying not to vomit.

Now encased in magic,

they hovered through the air,

cursing and protesting

to all who were there.

Dropped into the middle

of the pony fuck-party,

they grumbled sweet nothings

and Nogla became farty.

Undeterred,

but slightly cringing,

the ponies around them,

embraced them while singing.

Delirious,

still sitting by a tree,

cursed to himself,

and arose to go pee.

Catching his movement,

and smiling happily,

Applejack waved him over,

saying all sappily.

"C'mon Sugarcube,

get over here now.

If you don't, well,

you'll hate me. I'll show you how."

Delirious nickered,

"Go fuck yourself, Applejack."

"Can't do it alone,"

said the farmpony right back.

Pupils dilated,

and his eyes dancing erratically,

Delirious walked over,

grumbling sporadically.

Now nestled inside

the huge pony hug,

Delirious looked at his friends,

looking quite smug.

As the embrace broke,

and made way for the tree,

Delirious still

really had to pee.

The ponies, (and pig),

now turned around,

looked up at the tall pine,

not making a sound.

Wildcat,

his hooves trotting through snow,

scanned the ground for the cord,

and, unlucky, he groaned.

Finally spotting it,

next to a leaf,

he attached both ends,

and sighed with relief.

The lights,

now on and sparkling bright,

lit up the Hearth's Warming tree,

as morning came to thwart their night.

The ponies all smiled,

their friendships ablooming,

as they watched the nestled star high above,

unmoving.

Its golden exterior,

shimmering through the night,

caused them to cheer

for their goals proved right.

Though small,

weak, and made out of tinsel,

the star remained still

and bright like a pencil.

It was Hearth's Warming Day

and the presents would come,

but for now they would sit,

and rest 'til the sun.

Act 2 of OMM,

following Delirious in the desert,

would be fast approaching,

and the readers (hopefully) would not desert.

"So Happy Holidays," said the crew,

"from all of us."

Wildcat, happily,

shouted...

"Badoop-a-doop Banana Bus!"

Author's Notes:

Happy Holidays, guys! You guys wouldn't believe me if I told you how hard this was to write! Hope you guys stick around for January! Be safe, don't eat the yellow snow, and try to have fun for fucks' sake. Hope you enjoyed!