“Tia, are you packed yet?!” I called down the hall with all my fiances behind me. For some reason, everyone but Tia were able to get ready for an impromptu tropical island getaway in minutes, and were all already stripped of their armors, and wearing nothing but skimpy bikinis and their beach mat towels for skirts. They all just went for plain white too, wanting to hurry to someplace to relax with their future hubby. But Tia….

“No! I look fat in everything I try on!” Tia’s despairing wail called down the hall, getting me and the other girl’s to groan, and both Lulu and Blue quickly trotted down the hall to fetch their equally-sized...hey...why is Blue so much taller? I hadn’t noticed until now...whatever, so much weird shit’s been going on I’m not even going to bother wondering why.

“Sister! Niece and I look exactly the same as you. Are you calling us fat too?” Luna demanded, and I had to choke a laugh while the other girls all giggled behind me.

“N-no! Of course not! You both look amazing in such simple wear, but when I-EEP!”

“Auntie! Do you see these glorious bosoms of yours?”

“B-bluebelle it is not-AHN~!”

“Shut up and put on a skimpy top, a thong, and grab a towel and let’s go! No matter what you dress in, Dox is going to drool over you anyway!”

“B-but-OH~!”

“But nothing!”

“F-fine! Please let go of my nipples!”

By this point, I wasn’t even fazed by their nonsense. It seemed that Blue was getting more and more lewd by the day, but whatever, it was par the course by now. Thankfully her raunchy behavior paid off, as soon a blushing Luna and Tia were approaching us with Tia now wearing the same bikini as the rest of the girls and the same kind of towel as a sarong, while Blue was looking quite cheeky and accomplished of herself. “Are we ready now? So long as we have bits, I’m sure Homage, Avarice or Vaga will be willing to accommodate us.”

“Y-yes, we have our bits in our personal storages.” Tia replied, reaching into her great cleavage and pulling out a hefty bag of bits that couldn’t have fit in there even with how huge she was. Hammerspace ftw.

“Alright then.” I took out the Matrix, and thought of Valley Island. Soon a portal whooshed open. Just as we were all about to walk through, Yngve came running up to stop me.

“Dox, I have something for you!” Yngve called out as he came running up. He was carrying a long case with a handle on it. He stopped in front of me and handed me the case. “This is for you, Dox. A new blade, forged by the Dwarves and Low Elves, given special magic by the Changelings, and given your essence by me giving them the special distillation of your blood that I prevented you from drinking oh so long ago. Well? Go on, open it. It’s your early wedding gift, after all.”

I opened the case to find a silvery blade with no guard and an equally silvery grip. “Yngve, I don’t know what to say.” I said. “Thanks.”

“I’ll tell everyone involved what you’ve said.” Yngve said. “But please, hold it, try it out.”

I did as instructed and picked up the blade with my right arm. The second I did, however, I…. felt something. It wasn’t even like, ‘oh hey, Hyperion technology is amazing and gave you nerves’ type of feeling. No, this felt like I actually had my original arm back.

Anyways, I gave the sword a few test swings, and upon finding that it had AMAZING balance, attempted to put the sword back in its case, only to find it instead ‘melting’ onto my arm.

“What the heck?!” I exclaimed. “What’s going on with this sword?”

“It’s called the Changeling Blade.” Yngve said. “It’s meant only for you. As such, it has bonded with you. If you ever need it, it should automatically form a blade of your choice for you, as long as it’s not complex. While you’re not using it, however, it shall simply ‘rest’ on you. It can cut through the air like nothing else and never dull, being that it’s core was forged from pure Aetherium.”

“Again, I don’t know what to say other than thanks.” I said. “Please, Yngve, tell everyone that I say thank you very much.”

“It is the least we could all do.” Yngve said. “Now, have fun on your vacation.” And with that, he walked off.

After Yngve’s departure, my to-be wives (sans Arbok, who had gone home) and myself all walked through and all paused in surprise at the sight. “Uh...how long has it been?”

Standing before us, was a tower. A literal cubical tower that was almost seamless on the outside, standing at least ten stories tall and had framework going even higher with the Hyperion logo proudly emblazoned on the steel-colored exterior in bright yellow, with the subtitle ‘Multiversal Branch #1’.

“Well damn.” I said. “This place is pretty impressive.”

“Thank you Scout Dox. Your appreciation is noted, and you and your group’s reactions have been photographed and sent to our superiors as per instructed.” Homage’s dry, and completely business tone ruined it, and we all drew our eyes down at the stuck-up plothole who was put somewhat in charge here. He seemed no different, still gray on gray, still wearing the same gray suit, still looking as bored as ever. The only main difference was he now held a sort of link to his Echo device that acted as a tablet alongside his baddass glasses and his own programming. Guess running something like this requires even a precision machine like him to multitask.

“Hey Homage. We’re here for a nice-.”

“Vacation, clearly. Why else would your companions all be wearing next to nothing. No Athena, I haven’t looked at any of the files you’ve been sending, stop spamming my Echo inbox. Good to see you Sapphire and Emerald, greetings to the rest of you.” He then waved towards the direction of the village. “The resort is that way.”

What? I and the others all turned the direction he gestured, and gawked. HOW THE HELL?! WHAT?! The village was gone! Now it was a five-story cube-shaped condo building next to the nearly-abandoned adobe huts that now obviously served more as storage for the villagers, as we could see several zebras wearing actual CLOTHES now waving down at us, all smiles, shouting greetings in their native Hawaiian. “W-w-what? How?”

“Once the most important parts of the headquarters were finished, it was easy enough to start building our own more mundane loaders without souls to build and work on other projects. Thanks to Division President Avarice’s heavy-handed business practices of throwing money at everything, we’ve been able to focus entirely on productivity. That is just the first of several coast-lining condo buildings. The first few are meant entirely to house the Hawaiians, but there should still be several of them willing to share their condos to make room for guests.” Homage stated, and then paused with a small smile. “Might I interest you in a tour of the facility later? Avarice wants everyone who visits to see what we’re doing here.”

“Uh, sure. Why not.” I said. “Girls, you up for a tour later?”

At seeing the Mars unit tramp from behind the facility, helping as a mobile platform for JET loaders to move building materials up, the ones that weren’t claptrap units all nodded dumbly in astonishment. Sure, they saw my small army of robots, but seeing them put to constructive use must’ve really interested them. “Very good. I shall let the staff know to expect a tour. Off with you now, this is still a construction site, we don’t want any safety hazards.” Homage shooed us away, and we all wandered towards the condos.

“This place is amazing! I’ve never seen anything like it!” Celestia cheered, glad her niece forced her to hurry up so they could get here.

“We agree sister! Dox, could any of your soldiers perhaps help with rebuilding the castle? If so, the repairs could actually be finished in a quick enough time for us to put off the wedding until a proper pavilion could be ready without such garish damage nearby.” Luna said, before perking another idea. “Or we could have the wedding here! On the beach!”

“I don’t know Auntie, that sound’s rather imposing of us.” Blue commented, remembering that the places they were supposed to be staying for a few days were the homes of zebras who lived here.

“I agree with Blue. Don’t want my wedding in the same place I was born. Be really awkward.” Athena commented, shivering at remembering her mom bringing her into herself for transferral, the way the changeling sisters also shivered said they thought the same.

“Yeah, I want the wedding at home too. It wouldn’t make much sense to have it here. I mean, this isnt’ even our world. We want the wedding/coronation to be in a place the masses can see...oh...right...I need a speech don’t I?” I realized nervously, and they all looked at me like I was an idiot. “Great...how do I tell them I just happened to fall in love with the country’s leaders, and they all fell in love with me? The wedding itself should be enough for that...crap! I need to write my vows to you all!”

“No you don’t.” Blue said as we neared the building from the...I guess it doesn’t have a front or back, or side, each one had doors it seemed. “You’re marrying seven others. We’re officially considered a Herd then. To write vows for a herd is...well, ridiculous. You love us all and we love you, it’s simple. Using the Herd’s Vow is more than enough.” Blue said as we neared the doors, but before we could knock, they were burst open by a couple of buxom-oh, who am I kidding, they’re all buxom-zebra mares wearing actual cloth bikinis themselves that were honestly more conservative than my fiance’s garbs, and they greeted us with bright smiles and open arms.

“Welcome to Maui!” They greeted us in slightly electronic voices. I noticed they had Echos on their bikini bottom’s straps, so they must’ve had a translation software, cool. “We are Wave and Wash, and we shall be your hosts today!” Oh, boy...synchronized twins…. “Come! We shall show you our condo!”

They led us to the center of the building, which met all four halls that led straight to the doors, and had a glass-walled elevator in the center. It was an incredibly smooth ride to the top floor, and a quick trot to the end of the hall facing the shore. Why do we automatically get the penthouse suite? “Wow...this is….” It was like a five-star hotel back on Earth, all the modern trappings too. Even TV. But I guess there’s not really anything to watch, as it was just tuned to a ‘Hyperion Employee Schedule List’ and...ah, that’s why. These two were suddenly shifted from mining duty to acting as our hosts for the duration of our stay. No wonder they were so excited.

“Please, make yourselves comfortable! Would you like something to drink? Massage? Tan?” They asked eagerly, all too happy to get to serve someone rather than work in a cramped tunnel or dig in general.

“Oh~ a massage sounds wonderful~....” Blue said rather...breathily, getting one of the twins to blush, as the claptrap girls of my group all instantly moved to the computer station, more interested in seeing what they could do there.

“I want to play on the beach, how about you Dox?” Luna asked, Tia quickly nodded at the idea, and I saw no reason not to since the others were more interested in their own pursuits, which was fine by me, we’re here to relax after all.

“Sure! Race you down!” I ran for the balcony, grabbing a convenient volleyball that was sitting off to the side as they followed and we all jumped out, missing Blue grab both of the zebras and pull them into their bedroom which slammed shut. We all drifted down gently, me with gravity and them with their wings, before we met sand and dashed to the shore.

“C’mon! Let’s play some waterball-WAH!” I tripped on something that was barely sticking out of the sand, and the next thing I knew I saw the Void. Fucking damn it!

Meanwhile, in another Universe:

“NAAAVIIII!!! I’M BORREEDDUH!”

A tiny filly sized blue disguised changeling sighed.

“What part of a freaking SKY CITY don’t you understand! Cloudsdale was something you wanted to see! I learned the cloud walking spell just for YOU!” She ranted.

Her human partner sighed. Walking out into the empty streets she noticed something in the window. It was a single six-sided die. “NAVI! Where’s our bits?!”

Navi sighed again. “Here.” She mutters, tossing her a bag.

“WOO! GONNA PLAY DUNGEONS AND DRAGONS TONIGHT!” She shouts, running into the store.

“... What?”

Few minutes later…

“Back!” The human cried, holding the Die.

“Soo…Why’d you want it?”

“I dunno. I think it’s a token however.” Said human shrugged.

“Heather. How the buck is that a token?” Navi muttered.

“I heard this!” Heather then tossed the “Token” at Navi.

“OW!”

“Let’s roll it! This will be our Second displaced!” Heather cried with excitement.

“Wait-”

Picking the Die off the clouded ground, and ignoring her partner, Heather proceeded to roll the D6, opening a portal to the void.

Dox POV:

I fell out of the portal that opened up below me…. And then proceeded to fall through a layer of clouds.

“I got you!” A tiny voice said.

“No need!” I shouted back at the voice, not even looking where it came from. I used my gravity powers to halt my fall, stopping abruptly about thirty feet below the cloud layer that I fell through. “Ah, that’s better.” I looked up from the ground and moved to get ‘onto my feet’ and stand in mid air. “What?”

“... Uh… Navi? Who exactly did we summon?” Called a voice from above me.

“I.. Have no idea.” Said the voice from earlier. I turned to look at it, and saw a tiny filly with a purple mane and tail. Her eyes were emerald green as well.

“Hi.” I said to the little filly. “I’m Dox Ad Finem, and you are?”

She remained silent until she facehoofed.

“It’s another one!” She shouted.

“Another what?” I asked as I started floating myself back up through the cloud layer, only to rest on top of the clouds. “Another Displaced? I mean, you should expect that, considering you used my token.”

“I told you it was a token! But I expected something other than another Human.” A female voice said. I turned to face the source of the voice. What I saw was what looked like a female version of Link from the Legend of Zelda, specifically the Twilight Princess game. Man, just getting nostalgia from thinking about it. I loved that game.

“I am not another human!” I complained, gesturing to my nearly naked form, being that I got summoned while I was in my bathing suit, that being the leaf and vine thong the zebras gave me a while back. Man, kinda killed my mood. “I’m a changeling! And hey, I didn’t expect a human to summon me, either.”

The two remained silent until with a flare of blue the filly turned into a blue changeling with violet eyes.

“Uh… Navi? Your disguise dropped again.” The human pointed out.

“You are oblivious aren’t you?” She muttered.

“Oblivious to- HOLY CRAP ANOTHER CHANGELING!” The female Link exclaimed.

“Yo, calm yourself.” I said. “If I was one of the changelings that you knew, I would have done something else. I don’t feed off emotions, and I don’t do the whole ‘base form is a bug thing’. As much as I love my girls back home who do that, I am not like that. Like I said, I’m Dox Ad Finem, who are you?”

“S-sorry about that.. We haven’t had the best luck with other changelings… Oh I’m Heather, And this is Navi.” Heather introduced.

“Yeah, anyways, you summoned me?” I said, trying to get to the point. “What do ya need? I was kind of on vacation after almost getting killed.”

“Uhh… I kinda just noticed this in the store over there… and thought it was a normal D6. I was gonna try and introduce… Dungeons and Dragons to my Equestria.” Heather muttered, looking down.

“Ah, well then.” I said. “Well then, since I’m here, anything you need help with?”

“Weeelll… There IS this one thing…” Navi pointed out.

“Well? On with it!” I yelled at the tiny changeling. Wow, now that I’m actually just looking at her, I just noticed that she’s not Anthro. Wow, been awhile since I’ve been in a world like this.

“We found a temple-slash-dungeon thing!” Heather shouted.

“AAAnd the minute we stepped in we were nearly killed.” Navi deadpanned.

“A dungeon?” I asked with a deadpan look. “Really? You’re looking at the guy who was displaced all because of Dungeons and Dragons. So, do you know what kind of dungeon it was?”

“.... Water. And to make it even more annoying, the entrance was styled a lot like multiple LoZ water temples…”

Meanwhile, back where Dox left the girls:

“FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!!!” Came the voice of Dox.

“Sister?” Said Luna, who stopped tossing a beachball to her sister.

“Yes, Lulu?” Said Celestia.

“I fear for whoever just pissed off our to-be husband on his vacation.” Luna said with a concerned look on her face.

“As am I, sister.” Celestia said.

“Did you guys hear that?” Emerald said, running up to Celestia and Luna and being followed by Sapphire, Athena, and Bluebelle, who looked rather disheveled, and sweaty.

Back with Dox:

“A WATER temple?!” I asked. “Are you freaking kidding me?!”

“... No…” Heather said.

“Well, great.” I said. “Let’s just get this over with. Where is it, anyways?”

“Around Rainbow Falls I believe.” Navi answered, unfazed.

“Huh, never been there.” I said. “Let’s go.”

“Side note, Don’t taste the rainbow.” Heather warned.

“Oh, too late on that, girly.” I said. “And you don’t even know what I mean.” ‘Mm...Tia…I suddenly want some more of her steak...even if it’s wrong.’

It was a calm trip over to Rainbow Falls….

And by calm, I mean that my new changeling and human friends were completely terrified as I used my gravity control to fly us around. Heather was at least able to give me directions in her state of panic, albeit they made the flight way worse on themselves. At one point, she just started screaming, and I had to guess which way to go. Honestly, just got lucky on that one.

“Alright, here we are, I think.” I said, setting us all down. “I’m not exactly too sure, I’ve never been here before.”

“Huh? Oh yeah, We’re here!” Heather chirped.

“Huh, nice place.” I said, looking around and admiring the scenery around me. The place lived up to its name. There were rainbow colored waterfalls all over the place! It looked amazing! “So, where’s that dungeon?”

“Over here!” She yelled, pushing a branch back.

I walked over to where Heather was, and looked at what I was about to enter. Two rainbow streams poured down on either side, being divided by a stone pillar. The door was up on a ledge that was nearly caved in on. Very interestingly designed columns stood on each side. There looked to be nearly no way up by foot. But by some kind of presence, out of rainbows that made the pool below, slowly rose stone platforms. They didn’t look like the most structurally sound items, however.

“Yep, just like a LoZ dungeon.” I said. “Mystic and weird. Wow.”

“Said nearly the same thing when I found it.” Heather agreed.

“Let’s just go get killed…” Navi muttered.

“Hey now, cheer up.” I said. “You got the Dungeon Master of Equestria with you. It should be fine.”

“Wonderful…” She sarcastically sighed.

Just upon entering we were immediately assaulted by three jelly-like ponies. They didn’t really do much on their own…. but I was dumb enough to want to see what they were gonna do. They all just sort of shambled towards each other and then morphed into a giant jelly pony...…. which was creepy as hell.

“Great.” I said, mentally summoning the sword I had recently gotten from Yngve. “So, jelly ponies. Now they’re a big one. Reminds me of the chus from LoZ. How did you screw up here, again?”

“It was more later on with arrow traps.” Navi explained.

“Not my fault that a boulder hit the button!” Heather shouted, slashing at the jelly pony.

“Hey, stop bickering and get the thing.” I said.

“‘Ey! We do this all the- CRAP!” Heather shouted, dodging a rock.

“Ok now that was mean!”

“Yo, calm yourself.” I said charging towards the jelly pony. “Enemy won’t play fair. And is generally mean. Just fight back.” I collided with the ponified chu jelly, only to get stuck inside it. I started slashing around inside of it, eventually getting it to separate into the three chu ponies again. Two of them retreated, while one of them stayed behind, dazed.

Heather readied her sword and took a step forward. As she brought down her blade to end the chu pony, I ran over and stopped her blade with my own.

“Hey, no.” I said, knocking Heather backwards a few feet. “The chu is down. I’m not even sure this one meant any harm. Probably just protecting its home.” I turned to the jelly pony, who had recovered and was now looking at me with wide eyes, confused as to why I had protected it. “You okay, little jelly pony?” The chu nodded. “Can you speak?” The chu shook its head. “Alright then. So, why did you and those others attack us? Do you know why?” The chu shook its head. “Well, did you mean to attack us?” The chu shook its head fiercely, as if trying to get its point across. “Well, what about the other ones? Did they mean to?” The chu nodded. “So, what about…. Wait a sec, you’re a red chu. Hey Heather, you hurt?”

“I’m fine…” She muttered.

“Really?” I said with an unamused tone. “Well, what about you, Navi?”

“I’m ok.” She peeped.

“Well then, I see no reason why you came towards us, little jelly one.” I said. “Unless you’re lying, Heather.”

“Seriously?! Why does everyone I meet always think I lie?!” She argued.

“Because I have no reason to believe you yet.” I said. “I mean, I don’t have to believe Navi, either, but she seems a little more trustworthy. I mean, she at least didn’t freak out when I revealed what I am. Plus, she didn’t try to attack the downed chu.”

“Not my fault I’m a little slow...” She said, looking down.

“So, are you alright or not?” I asked. “And please, be honest.”

“Other than being hurt inside, I’m fine.” I glared at her. “Don’t give me that look! I’m telling the truth! Honest!” I continued to glare at her. “Ok. I MIGHT have scraped my elbow.”

“Alright then.” I said, turning back to the chu pony. “So, is that why you came towards us?” The chu pony nodded enthusiastically. “You just wanted to heal her, right?” Again, the chu pony nodded enthusiastically. “All right then. Now, I’m not sure about her, but how’d you like to come with me?” The chu pony’s eyes lit up, as if to say ‘Really?’ “I mean it. I’ll even give you a bottle or something to sleep in, or just so you can hang with me and not get hurt.” The chu pony ran up to me and hugged my leg, seeming to cry without tears. “You’re welcome, little goo pony. Actually, do you have a name?” The chu shook its head. “No? Well, I’ll think of something. In the meanwhile, Heather, do you have a bottle?”

“Yeah.” She said, pulling out a bottle with a note in it. “One sec.” She took out the note and tossed it behind her.

“Can I have it?” I asked. “And you might want to read that note. Last time I checked, notes are important in LoZ.”

“Fine.” She said, giving me the bottle and picking back up the note. She read it over before chuckling a bit. “Ohhh! It’s this note!”

“Alright, you can tell me what it says in a sec, just let me do this real quick.” I said, opening my magic satchel and pulling out my massive tome. I went scanning through the book for a second before falling on a page describing an enchantment for bottles that made them seemingly bottomless. Settling for the enchantment, I reached back into my magic satchel, pulled out some chalk, and drew an enchanting circle on the ground, before drawing a rune on the bottle that signified space. I slammed my hands down on the ground around the circle and focused my magic to the bottle. One flash of light later, and the bottle now glowed a faint red. “Alright, that should do it.” I pulled off the stopper on the top of the bottle. “Go ahead, little goo pony, jump on in. I won’t trap you in there.” At that, I lit the cork stopper on fire and threw it away. Immediately afterwards, the chu pony turned into slime and lunged into the bottle. It settled immediately afterwards and poked out a goopy head. It rubbed itself on me then went back into the bottle. “You’re welcome chu pony. So, Heather, shall we continue?”

“Sure. ADVENTURE!” She shouted.

Navi sighed and facehoofed. “She gets over excited at the mention of these things…”

“It’s okay.” I said. “I get like that sometimes. But not with water temples. Nintendo made me hate them.”

“Nin… tendo?” She asked. “I’m guessing another human thing?”

“Duh.” I said. “Good company, but horrible sometimes.”

“Huh.”

“Hurry up slowpokes!” Heather cried from down the hall.

“Hold onto your tunic, we’re coming.” I called back.

Half of a shitty water puzzle later (What? You want this temple? Go play Twilight Princess!):

We ended up being stuck in a cave, with little things falling from the ceiling. I had shorted out my ‘Loader Shoes’ getting us here. Hell, they acted as a pair of iron boots while in water. It sucked!

“How the hell did we get here?” I asked. “I mean, you refused to put on your Zora Armor, all because I said I wouldn’t leave the room, and you don’t have iron boots! Do you know how hard that waterbreathing spell was for you? Changing into an Argonian, a lizard that breathes water, is easy for me, but giving you a spell that allows you to breath underwater? Hard as shit! And another thing, it’s not the easiest thing in the world to use gravity like how I was. I could have created a black hole on accident! And now look where we are!”

“Hey! Even though I look like a guy I’m still a- aw crap... Whatever you do… Don’t look up.” Heather said.

“What do you mean?” I asked, right before looking up. “Oh, I forgot. It’s this water temple.”

Immediately after looking up, I saw a frog like head look back at me, before a HUGE frog jumped off the stalactite of rock that was on the ceiling. It croaked at us before shaking off the weird things on its back, which turned out to be tadpoles, and wandering around and trying to attack us.

“Wow, that is…. underwhelming.” I said, willing forth the Changeling Blade and pulling out my flintlock. “So, what’s the strategy?”

“Get rid of the tadpoles, Then it’ll jump in the air if it’s exactly how it is in the game…” Heather said. She hit away a few of the tadpoles. “Then basically go ape-shit on it’s tongue.”

“Sounds perfect.” I said, shooting a tadpole next to me. “But what if I shot it in the eye?”

“I dunno.” Heather said, right as I shot the giant toad in the eye.

“I guess that’s one way!” Navi shouted, kicking a tadpole out of the way.

“Ok, This is getting boring, HEY FROG BREATH!” Heather shouted.

It turned to look at her.

“BET-” Cutting her off mid-taunt, It jumped into the air, casting a giant shadow over her.

“RUNRUNRUNRUN!” Navi shouted, flapping her wet wings as fast as she could.

“MINE!” I shouted, running right under the center of the shadow and pointing my blade above me. ‘Oh crap wait. I need a bigger blade than this…. What was it that Yngve told me? It’ll form a weapon I will forth? Something like that. Alright blade, I need you to be HUGE!’ The blade responded, and transformed into what seemed like a wider version of Cloud’s Buster Sword. The toad fell right on top of it, cutting open a huge hole and allowing me inside. I immediately shrank the sword back down to a more manageable size and started hacking away at the insides of the toad.

After about a minute of this, I heard it spit up something, then it just evaporated in a puff of smoke.

“Well, that was easy.” I said.

The two said nothing, They only gave me stunned faces.

“What?” I said, walking over to them and stopping at the brown sludge that the toad hurled up.

“N-nothing…” Heather muttered and walked over as well.

“Alright, so, let me clean this off real quick.” I said. I used some gravity to pick up a patch of water that was on the floor, then floated it over the sludge before letting it drop on top of it. The water washed away the sludge, leaving a chest behind. “Coolio. So, you wanna open it, or can I?”

“I’ll do it.” Heather offered. She stepped up to the chest and pried it open. As she did, Music began to play.

“Ok, Where the hell is that music coming from?” She said, stopping halfway. Her and Navi looked over at me.

“Eheheh. Sorry.” I said, turning off the music from my arm computer. “I couldn’t resist.”

“Eh.” She simply said, Opening the chest the rest of the way. “DUN DUN DUN DAAAH!” She yelled, holding up the two items inside.

“What.” I said, staring at Heather as she held up two different versions of the clawshot. “There was a longshot AND a clawshot in there? Can I have one?”

“Dibs on Clawshot!” She responded, tossing me the longshot.

“Sweet.” I said. I looked at the longshot in my left hand, then at the clawshot, then at my mechanical arm. “Hmm…. I wonder. Echo Eye, record.” I saw a small red dot in my vision, showing me that it was indeed recording. “Alright, sorry Jack, but I’m about to fuse this device to my arm. I’ll send you the new specs later, just please don’t destroy the warranty on the arm. Avarice will kill me. Echo Eye, end recording and send.” With that, the red dot left my vision.

“Who are you talking to?” Navi asked.

“No one.” I said. “Just recording a message and sending it to someone.”

“H-” Navi started before Heather clamped a hand over her mouth.

“Enough with the questions. Please. I don’t want you to turn into nerd pony.” She told her.

“Nerd pony, nerd pony…. Oh! You mean Twilight?” I asked. “She’s pretty weird, right? Anyways, wanna see something cool?”

“Sure.” They both agreed.

“Watch this.” I said. I focused some magic into the longshot in my left arm, and immediately it gained a weird pattern that was reminiscent of a circuit board. I brought it close to my right arm, watching as it, too, gained the circuit board pattern around the forearm. The second I made them touch, there was a blinding flash of light. When it settled, I noticed my arm now had some chains on the forearm, which were quickly being covered up by the currently docile Changeling Blade. “Sweet, now how do I-” I was cut off by my hand launching out and smacking Heather in the face. Good thing I wasn’t making a fist.

“OW! The hell was that for?!” She shouted, rubbing her nose.

“Sorry!” I said, panicking slightly over my now detached hand which was connected to my arm by a chain. “I don’t really know how to work it. Pretty sure I just figured it out, though. Considering my arm pretty much functions on my thoughts, I think I just have to think about it.” Sure enough, my stupid logic was correct, and the arm retracted when I thought about it. I turned and aimed my arm elsewhere, morphed my arm into a claw, then fired it off at a wall. I somehow got purchase on the wall, and made myself retract towards it. “Hey! Look at that! I don’t have to rely on random crap to use my longshot, how about you?”

“Oh haha. I can work mine just fine!” She shouted, putting it on her right hand and resting it on her left arm. It suddenly shot out, broke her left arm, and shoved a part of the bone out of her skin, allowing something black to drip out of it.

“S-see?... Ok, Yeah, I haven’t figured it out.” She said as she winced in pain.

“Hey, I can help you, ya know.” I said, dropping off the wall and walking up to her. “It’s easy, just pop your bone back in place, then a healing spell. It’d be painful, but I can heal you.”

“Ok… That sounds like it’ll work, but then again I kinda have dealt with something like this before…” She winced.

“Ok, Navi!” She shouts. Navi lit her horn and light weaved around it, mending skin and bone. It took a few minutes but soon her arm was back in working order.

“Ok, That took a lot…” Navi wheezed.

“Coolio. Thanks Navs!” She replied.

“Wow, that’s pretty handy.” I said. I turned to look at the bottle that I had secured to my hip. “Can you do something like that, little goo pony?” The chu pony poked its head out from its bottle, nodded a couple times, then went back into its bottle. “Cool. So, we have a dungeon to finish, so let’s get to it.”

“I figured this thing out!” Heather shouted, shooting the clawshot at the pressure plate above the door. It latched on, pulling her along until she weighed it down enough. She dropped down and smirked at me. “I can handle myself.”

“Good to know.” I said. “Now let’s get moving!”

Another half of a horrible water puzzle later (Again, play Twilight Princess if you want the actual dungeon, I don’t want to spoil it):

We stood at the entrance to the room that had the boss of the dungeon, according to Heather. I had long forgotten this temple, but the longer we went on through it, the more I remembered. Also, somewhere along the way, Heather had found a pair of iron boots, which never originated in this temple. She also at some point changed into the Zora armor.

“So, we jump in this hole in the ground, and we find who again?” I asked.

“Morpheel. He’s basically a giant eel… creature. Then again, It might be a different one.” She explained.

“Ah, alright then.” I said. “So, if I remember correctly, a horrible, horrible boss that is super easy.”

“Basically yeah.” Heather said, putting on her Iron boots.

“Great.” I said, slipping the broken ‘Loader Shoes’ on back over my strange leather running shoes. “Most underwhelming boss is a go.”

“Yolo!” She briefly yelled before slipping underwater.

“Yay, someone crazier than me.” I said to Navi before grabbing the tiny blue changeling.

“Oh no…” She muttered.

“Oh yes.” I said before jumping over the hole with the changeling. “LEEEEEEROOOOY A-JEEEEEEEEEEEEEENKIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINS!”

We floated down slowly to the bottom, Navi and Heather not having to bother breathing because of my spell earlier. We eventually settled on the bottom near Heather, who was already fighting Morpheel.

“Oh yay, tentacle boy.” I said, staring at the already risen butthole that was Morpheel’s first stage. Another noise distracted me, however. As I turned to look, I noticed a giant fish swimming into the room. “Shit. Is that Gyorg?” Sure enough, it barfed up a ton of little fish that looked just like it. “Yep, Gyorg. Go to hell George!”

“OH GOD! WHY IS GYORG HERE?!” Heather cried.

“I don’t know!” I cried. “I’ll take him, you take Morpheel!”

“What?! I’m taking the easy one?! Give me a challenge! I’ll take Gyorg!” Heather cried out.

“Fine, I’ll go punch the water sarlak, you go get the one who vomits its young!” I yelled.

“WOO!” Heather screamed, swimming off to face Gyorg.

“I probably should make sure she doesn’t get killed huh…” Navi sighed.

About three minutes later:

“Wow. Underwhelming.” I said, shifting back into my normal form, seeing as how Heather killing Gyorg, then me killing Morpheel drained all the water in the room. “Seriously, this makes me wish I was fighting a dragon again!”

“I need to do this more often!!” She shouted.

“Yeah. And I should do less of this on my vacations.” I said, remembering what I was doing before I came here. “Speaking of that, can you send me back now, or can you not get out?”

“Uhhh I was honestly expecting this to be the kind of thing that make a portal appear, but… yeah we need help..” She sighed.

“Alright, but before we go, are those heart containers over there?” I asked, pointing over to where Morpheel originally was. Sure enough, there were two floating hearts.

“Huh. Interesting.” Navi muttered, walking over.

“I’m pretty sure only Heather can grab those, Navi.” I said. I looked over at the female Link. “Well? Get on with it. I don’t want to have to quote Monty Python again.”

“Fine!” She shouted, running over. She came running back a few minutes later.

“Ok, letsa go!” Heather said before grabbing the heart containers, which suddenly launched into her torso and seemed to melt into her. “Oh...oh~ I don’t feel so good!” I was really stunned, because Link never had this happen to him, but then again that was a game. She was visibly growing a few inches in height, her hips widened enough that she was now clearly a girl from any angle as her rear also got a slight boost. Her chest also grew out, making her tunic bulge and shift under them comfortably, yet still be perfectly conservative overall as her hair grew a bit longer. Now, instead of the 5’7” flat-chested girl that I had been adventuring with, there was now a 5’11” girl with at least a D-cup, and clearly some more muscle as her thighs had thickened a bit and really showed thanks to her white stockings.

Wow, if that’s what those did for her…. I want some now! Having some more muscles for my loves without having to alter my base form would be nice.

“Nice~.” I said, staring at her and acting just on the verge of being creepy. “Very nice.”

“I feel like I’m gonna throw up…” She moaned, stumbling over.

“Eh, you get used to it.” I said, reminiscing about my days of training back in Emerald and Sapphire’s hive. “Anyways, let’s get you two out of here, then I can leave.”

“Fine. I need to rest anyways.” Heather said.

I teleported us out of the temple, said my goodbyes, and then used my Runic Portal Matrix to open a portal back to Avarice’s world…. Where I was instantly crushed into a suffocating boob-to-face hug by Bluebelle yet again upon returning. “There you are! It’s only been an hour, but where have you been?”

I managed to struggle out of her surprisingly strong grip and gasped for air. I may be able to breath water, but damn it mare! I can’t breath through ten tons of boob! “Please let me breath Blue! *GASP* Okay, well, it was just a Displaced who summoned me on a whim. I decided to help her out with-.”

“Her~?” Blue asked with a purr, and I rolled my eyes.

“Blue, I have seven loves I’m marrying soon, I don’t need-.”

“Mistresses~!” Blue cooed with her eyebrows wagging, and I sighed as I pulled out of her hug, seeing nobody else on the beach.

“What’s with you lately? You’re getting taller, stronger, you’re getting all perverted. What’s going on Blue? I’ve been ignoring it, but I want to know if you have any idea while we’re alone.” I asked, knowing she might be embarrassed on the subject, and she wilted and twiddled her fingers.

“I’m not sure...ever since we...y’know...I’ve just been having so much energy. I’ve grown several inches and now I’m as tall as my aunts, and randy as all get-out. I...I even had several romps with those saucy zebra twins already.” Blue admitted to me, and the way her nipples were tenting her skimpy bikini top, I’m guessing this was a genuine issue for her if just talking about it was getting her bothered. Uh oh…. “Dox~...would you help me? I’ve always wanted to have sex on the beach...the chance somepony might see~....”

“Uh, Blue, as earnestly interested as I am…” I fought down the arousal, this wasn’t the place for it. “I’m tired, and this is a vacation. I didn’t exactly get to relax yet, and vigorous activity will just kinda-.” She shut me up by grabbing my crotch and growling in my face.

“You’re fucking me here, now.” She ripped off my thong and I gulped, yeah...some vacation…. Note to self. Find Vaga and make him explain. As she tackled me to the sand, I could’ve sworn I heard both Vaga’s, and Avarice’s laughter over the waves and our impassioned voices. Damn you two. Damn you two to Tartarus...for maybe a few minutes.

Author's Notes:

So, this was a chapter with New Dawn and her story The Non-Equestrian Equestrian Hero.
I also had a bit off help from GameJunkie, who I swear is now my Co-Author (Not really, he just helps out a ton. Love ya, Gam!).

Anyways, this is DJ A String, signing off.