Out in the Canterlot Castle gardens was a sight that very few could say they had seen in their lives.

Dox and Drake, however, were currently busy following Dox’s crazy plan, to which Drake had no idea about.

The two stood on the edge of the garden that overlooked the rest of Equestria. The sheer cliffside below giving a horrid contrast to the beautiful sight before them.

“So, I assume you would like to know my plan now?” I asked.

Drake just looked over at me with this pissed off look, probably from being awoken so early in the morning “Do tell since I have no damn clue what your planning” he said as he crossed his arms.

“Well, my plan is to get to Ponyville to hide out.” I said. “And Ponyville is over there” I pointed to the nearest town, “so you can see my problem. I have figured out, however, that the trains function at this early so that stallions, or in our case men, can ride out of the town their in on last notice. It’s a pricey ticket, but it’d work.”

Drake looked over at Dox as he rubbed his temples “Let me tell you how this plan is idiotic. One, in both Canterlot and Ponyville, the majority of the population is female like say….. eighty percent. Two, in Ponyville, there is a mint green pony who lives to track down non-stallion creatures like us. Three, all my bits, that I get from small time work and a bit of ‘monster tranquilizing’ as Mayor Mare calls it, is all the way at my base and I can’t access since someone took me out without letting me have enough time to get the damn pendent on!” Drake whisperer/yelled at me.

“Who said anything about buying a ticket?” I said. “We’re gonna hitch a ride on the train. That’s all assuming that we can get out before the castle is opened to the public and we’re swarmed by-”

I was interrupted by the ding-dong of a bell, stating that it was now indeed time to open the gates. As the gates opened, it became clear that it was indeed, too late, for standing on the other side of the gate, were thousands of mares looking over at us with a look of pure lust.

“Aw crap baskets.” I said. “Well, there goes plan A.”

“And here is Plan B…. ready?” Drake asked with a grin that left me feeling uneasy.

“You can’t be serious.” I said. “I had my own plan-”

It was then that I saw a guard being dragged off, all the while screaming for help. That poor stallion shall be missed.

“Nevermind,” I said.

With a raise of his gauntlet, Drake turned into some kind of creature that looked part demon, part monkey “Phase one: I turn into Riki since he has permanent invisibility. Phase two is where you come in” he said looking at me.

“Oh hell no!” I said, grabbing him. “We do this together!”

It was then that the ultimate bout of stupidity hit me……..

And I jumped off the side of Canterlot mountain with Drake in tow.

Drake glared at me “You idiot! I was going to drop a smoke bomb since that is something Riki can do as well!” he yelled as he clonked me in the head with the hilt of one of his daggers as he reverted back to his human self.

“Yeah? Well I don’t like it that you could just go poof and I can’t!” I screamed at him. “Besides, can’t you fly?” Drake just keeps glaring as a bright light came before my eyes. As I felt the wind rush past my face, I also felt a weird warmness over me as I looked over my shoulder to see myself being carried in the talons of a large firebird.

“Great! Now off to Ponyville, my flaming friend!” I said.

“Did you just give me an order?” Drake asked as his flaming head looks at me.

“Maybe? What about it?” I asked. Without any warning, I felt myself start to fall before a cold wetness came over me. As I scrambled up to the surface, I saw that I was in a lake and Drake was sitting on a tree branch looking at me. “The hell, man? The hell?”

“You come into my world, screw up the future in a major way, and expect me to follow your orders? I do not think so buddy. I’ve been following orders for more than my fair share of life and I won’t take orders from a guest. I know a place we can hide, but we do it my way understood?” Drake said.

“Yeah, no.” I said. “I know what you mean, but we have to work together on this, okay? We can’t just have a one man show here.”

“I know what I am doing, I already had everything planned with a few other stallions. Just been unable to get any message out of your arrival with the wedding and all….. not to mention I am also hiding from a certain mail courier” Drake said as his feathered shook a bit.

“Listen, man.” I said. “I know you have a plan and all, but I’d rather we have a conjoined plan, here. I had only planned on getting us out of the castle and to someplace we could hopefully hide. I was hoping we could brainstorm on how to avoid getting raped.”

“This is conjoined. Your plan of getting to Ponyville and my plan of a bunch of stallions who have a bunker made in Ponyville. Trust me, if worst comes to worst, we’ll just leave them to the mares. The worst one you’ll have to look out for is Cheerilee” Drake told me as he landed on the ground.

“Well shit.” I said. “But how are we getting in the bunker? Think of that one?”

“Simple. It’s hidden in a large, red, barn and the only mares there are a 10 year old and some 80 looking mare who is too old for heat season so we’re golden” Drake said with a big nod.

“We’re gonna get to the edge of Ponyville, then run to a barn?” I said. “That’s your master plan? Fine, I’ll trust you this once, but if this fails, I blame you. Just give me a second to do something”

I got out of the water and dried off my clothes with a quick spell. Then I took off my cloak and shook it a few times. On the last shake, the cloak changed from being black and long enough to cover my entire body, to a leathery brown and small enough to cover my arms. It also lost the hood, but I knew I could change it back.

“Ok, now we can go.” I said.

Drake looks at him “Now you have more magic? Oh freaking perfect” he says. He lowers himself “Hurry up. I’m sure just about everypony saw a large firebird enter the Whitetail Woods” he said.

“Let’s move then.” I said.

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After a ‘lovely’ morning flight, the sun was just peaking over the mountains, yet that was quickly killed by the sound of stallions screaming and running. Hell I even saw a really buff white pegasi run away from about ten mares “Welcome to Ponyville in heat” Drake said after reverting back to normal.

“Let’s get moving!” I said. Drake started the path to this so called ‘Bunker’ as we had to immediately go and hide in a alleyway. Out on the street was a mint green unicorn with all sorts of traps, nets, and even weird goggles as she seemed to be ignoring the stallions all together.

I pointed to the unicorn in question and asked, “That the one you were talking about earlier?”

Drake simply nodded “Lyra Heartstrings. Basically obsessive as she is musical. She plays in an ensemble with some mare named Octavia” he told me.

“Ah.” I said. “Starting to remember the whole internet thing about her obsession with hands….. I say we run, or better yet: Where is the barn?”

Drake pulled out a mini map as he pointed to us, next to a place called Sugarcube Corner and traced his finger all the way to a place called Sweet Apple Acres “Here” he said.

“Okay then.” I said as I grabbed Drake. “I’m still not used to this, but let’s try it. Just follow with me.” I started to walk forwards, which for us was, in the direction of Lyra.

Drake looked wide eye “What the fuck are you planning you-”

“I found you!” Lyra shouted as she looked ready to pounce on us both.

Just as she started to pounce upon us, we dissolved into a shadowy substance and disappeared, leaving a very disappointed Lyra sitting where we once were.

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The duo reappeared at the edges of the apple farm known as Sweet Apple Acres.

Dox, immediately after coming out of the shadowy substance, collapsed onto the ground, breathing very heavily.

“WHY?!” I screamed. “WHY IS THAT SO FREAKING HARD TO DO?!”

“Is som’one out there?” an elderly voice called out. Coming up the path was a wrinkled pony who looked around a good four foot two inches. As I looked at Drake, he bent over and hugged the old mare as she looked over “And who might you be youngin?” she asked me.

“I’m…. Dox…” I said in between heavy breaths. I took a second to get myself together and then continued. “I’m Drake’s friend.”

The old mare just chuckled weakly “Well any friend of Drake’s is a friend of the Apples! Name’s Granny Smith!” she says as she sticks a hand out.

I took her hand and promptly shook it. “It’s very nice to meet you. We’re in a rush, however. We’d rather not get hit by the horde of mares out there.”

Granny simply nods as she started to walk down the dirt path. Drake started to follow, but not before asking “Need me to carry you lightweight?” he joked.

“Hey, I’m still not used to using that teleport.” I said. “In fact, I’m pretty sure I’d be fine if I wasn’t dragging you, fatty.”

“Well excuse me mister bug king” he said as they came up to a pair of large barn doors. As the doors open, there stood a large, muscular, red stallion who looked like he could bench press the princesses and not get winded “Dox. Meet Big Macintosh”

“Uh. Hi….” I managed to get out. Holy shit, this guy is huge. All he did was nod as he stepped aside and showed us to a large, metal door. As he pulled it open, we could see four other stallions here.

Drake smiled “Dox, allow me to introduce you to these stallions who were smart for the Heat. You already know Big Mac, the light brown one is Caramel, the grey one with the jelly is Jelly Jammer, and the final one is Golden Delicious, a member of the Apple family” Drake explained.

“Hello everyone.” I said. “I’m Dox, and I’m a friend of-”

“Dox?” Jelly asked.

“He’s a changeling, a good changeling! King actually, but still he was here for a treaty, but well…. heat season. Look he is my friend and I can guarantee he ain’t trying some fancy, smancy takeover attempt or anything alright?” Drake said to at least relieve some of the tension in the room.

It had the desired effect, to an extent, but Jelly perked up again. “Wait, don’t changelings feed on love?”

Well shit. I can already tell where this is going. “Yes, but Dox is different. I say different as in it involves facts and other science/magic related stuff that only Sparkle or a Princess would understand” Drake told them as Mac shut the doors, locking all six of us down here for the heat season.

Wait, we’re in a barn….. Why was this a good idea again?

“Um, not to point out the obvious, but we’re in a structure made of wood and screws. Not just that, but….. isn’t there a window up in the loft? Specifically a window that DOESN’T CLOSE?!?” I yelled at them.

Of course I had to point out the only flaw as a weird high pitched voice called out “Finally somepony notices! I mean I always knew, but I wondered how long it take for somepony else to notice!” the voice said. I looked at Drake and he had this look of absolute terror on his face.

Just then, as if to accentuate me and the voice’s point, my chest pocket started glowing…. Why dice, why? You trying to warn me of something?

It was the d20….. Shit.

“Brace the door!” I yelled out. I rolled the die…… and got a one…...

At the door, Drake was some kind of stone giant creature as him and Mac braced the door. A southern voice spoke out “Big Mac! You open this door right this instant!” the voice yelled.

Drake looked back “That’s Applejack. Stubborn as a minotaur, but as honest as a church girl. Also kicks like hell too” he said as the door’s wood started to warp from the assault. Out the window multiple rainbow trails could be seen.

I started freaking out. I rolled a one and we were found…. and it’s still glowing, what the hell? I rolled it again…….. ANOTHER ONE?!?! WHAT IS MY LUCK TO DAY?!?

“DRAKE!” I yelled. “We’re screwed! Something bad’s gonna happen!”

“No crap! I can hear Rainbow getting ready to Rainbow Nuke us! AJ is kicking the door, Pinkie’s blocking the window, and I think Fluttershy is having Harry claw at the door!” Draked yelled just as the doors blew apart by a powerful magenta magic blast.

“SHIT!” I screamed. “Drake! Get over here!”

I ran over to the wall on the opposite side of the building and hovered my hand over the wall. On the wall appeared a circle full of runes for all of five seconds before going boom, leaving a gaping hole in the wall.

“MOVE PEOPLE! MOVE!” I screamed.

As I looked back, I saw all six mares run past the stallions and come after us. The other stallions were grabbed by a flock of other mares who followed those six.

Drake looked at me “Remember the six who called dibs on me? Well these are those six pal!” he yelled as he ran for his life alongside me. As we ran through the apple orchards, a shadow hovered over us as something started to fall from the sky. What landed in my hand was a….. muffin?

Oh god no. If the internet has taught me anything that I will never forget, it’s the mare of muffins…..

“RUN FASTER!” I screamed.

“Go away Derpy!” Drake yelled. He looked over “Give a mare a muffin and a pat on the back to help their emotions and they fall for you…. goddamn it” he said as he looked at his gauntlet “Idea!” he said. He soon turned into some kind of redhead woman as he grabbed my hand. Before I knew it we were moving as fast as the wind as we soon stopped in the middle of a field, near the edge of Ponyville with him reverting “Not many transformations left before Feedback. Still at least we got some distance” he said…. that was until a loud POP was heard and behind him were the seven mares who were chasing us “....They’re right behind me aren’t they?” he asked as he got enveloped in a magenta bubble.

“Hey ladies, he’s not up for that right now!” I said as I grabbed Drake. Sadly, this meant trapping myself in the bubble with him. “Well shit.”

“Don’t worry mister Dox” a soft voice said “We know two mares who would love to spend some time with you” the voice said with a smile.

Drake looked at me “Dox meet Fluttershy, the shyest and more easy to scare pony in all of Ponyville. Not to mention the kindest. You already know Sparkle, the unicorn of Magic. The pink menace is known as Pinkie Pie, a mare who loves to make friends and make ponies and people laugh in our case. She also loves parties. The flying rainbow is Rainbow Dash, fastest flyer and most loyal pony you’ll ever meet. Finally there is Rarity, the fashion queen and most generous pony you’ll ever meet. Also there is our mailmare Ditzy ‘Derpy’ Hooves” he said.

Well I guess introductions would be nice since we ARE stuck in a magic bubble.

“Yeah. Nice to meet ya.” I said. “But I’m sorry we can’t stay, we have a long busy schedule of not getting raped today. So sorry, but bye!”

I grabbed Drake and did the whole teleport thing again…… or at least, I tried….

Instead, I was left alone in the bubble, and Drake was freed, left standing about 2 yards away.

“RUN YOU MORON! RUN!” I screamed at him.

As Drake tore off in a fast run, the bubble dissipated “Come on girls! We can’t let anyone else grab him!” Twilight yelled as they all just left me there, sitting in the dirt as they all flew/ran after him. Unbeknownst to me though, two pairs of eyes watch me from the trees.

“Well, at least I’m free.” I said. About literally two seconds after I said that, I heard a bunch of screaming coming in my direction. I looked over to see a huge crowd of mares coming my way.

I did the next logical thing to do and took off running.

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I met up with Drake after running non-stop for about an hour. Drake looked out of breathe, but also he was strangely without his gauntlet as he plopped down onto a rock. I ignored it, however.

“Dude, I can’t believe we outran all those mares.” I said.

“I had to outrun the fastest flyers and magic users! That’s hard dude!” Drake said as he drops the hood to breathe a bit more.

“Yeah, try outrunning the rest of the town.” I said. “That’s hard.” He just chuckled as he leaned back looking at the sky, letting silence sit over us during our break.

“How did you get away, anyways?” I asked.

Drake chuckled “Simple, I made them all think I went into the river”

“How’d ya manage that?” I asked. “Surely one of the mares chasing you could have figured out you faked it?”

He shook his head “Not if I tossed my gauntlet. It’s practically the only magical thing I got so they follow it thinking I go hero or something”

Wait a sec…..

That’s his ace in the hole. The thing that would allow him to change into something that could outrun them, at least for a little…..

And there was another fact……

‘I’ve got one more transformation before feedback’

Why would he take it off if he still had one more go with it?.......

Unless, it wasn’t him…..

Crap.

“Listen, whoever you are, I’d rather not have any funny business right now, so I’m gonna go now…..” I said as I started to back away slowly.

Just as I turned around, however, I was met face to face with Sapphire….

“The hell? Didn’t I send you home?” I said.

She simply smiles “Apologies my king, but… well natural instincts trump authority” she said as a green flame came up behind me…. oh crap.

Standing there behind me, completely nude, was Emerald….. Well then….

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I’m pretty sure if they kept me tied up like they did to drag me here, this would be considered bondage.

I’m currently in my bedroom back at the hive. Simple teleports and boom, back here now. As I was currently laying in bed, all I could see before me was the bedroom door, walls, and of course two naked changelings that looked at me with lust. I could hear the small buzz of their wings as they started to move closer to me. One thing’s for certain, they were really ready for this. “Now where to begin?” Sapphire asked as she moved herself onto the bed

“Perhaps at his lips sister?” Emerald suggested as she came up on my left. Before me were a pair of Emerald’s eyes get in my vision “Don’t worry my king. This will be more fun then you can imagine~” she said with a purr. Before I could respond, I felt the pair of changeling lips meet my own.

*Obligitory Tease goes here. Look in the notes for reason.

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The next morning I woke up and found myself between two very happy changelings. Arms over my chest and lower back, soft murmurs as I felt their faces nuzzle my hair and neck, and legs crossed over mine…. I wasn’t going anywhere, anytime soon.

Author's Notes:

* so, I'm a tease. Deal with it.
Sorry, but it was in the middle of me writing with another author, so we had to move on.... among things.

Anyways, I swear, I am not good for long chapters. So don't expect a lot of big ones.
Also, don't expect the clop soon. I will write it, but it may not appear here, or it'll be called a 'Deleted Scene' and be marked as such.

Anyways, I'll see you all later, BYE!