Chapter III

"No. Nope."

Rex continued to look through the apples in his bags while Applejack spoke to me. "Thank you kindly, Ethan, for helping me out. I bet Big Macintosh I could get all these golden delicious in the barn by lunchtime. If I win, he's gonna walk down Stirrup Street in one of Granny's girdles."

She giggled while I raised an eyebrow. "You told me he got hurt and needed help collecting apples. You didn't say anything about a bet."

Applejack blushed heavily as she stuttered. "I-I-I mean... uh... Nice weather we're having today, huh? Hehe..."

I sighed heavily. "Applejack, that was a bit mean of you, going against his back to get help. I don't think he got any help himself."

Applejack sighed in response. "Yer right, Ethan, Ah'm sorry. Ah'll tell Big Mac that he don' need t' go down the street."

I nodded in response, then felt my stomach grumble slightly. 'Shit.' I looked at AJ. "Hey, think I could buy one of these apples before you put them away? I'm a bit hungry."

Applejack shook her head in amusement. "Not at all, Ethan. What 'bout you, Rex?"

Rex looked up from the apple that his teeth were sunk into, bit the bit off, and chewed a bit while speaking. "Surr, Ab'll Bay."

I rolled my eyes at him. "Don't speak with your mouth full, Rex." He shrugged and swallowed. I then looked at him with a raised eyebrow. "Hey, didn't Celestia say something about sending a letter around this time?"

Rex raised an eyebrow. "She did?"

I nodded. "Yes, before she left to Canterlot, during our lunch with the Apples. You were there, Rex."

He simply grunted, then burped as a letter came out of the flames. He put out his hand and caught it expertly, twirled it around, and pulled off the seal, then rolled it open, before reading.

"Here ye, here ye. Her grand royal highness, Princess Celestia of Equestria, is pleased to announce the Grand Galloping Gala to be held in the magnificent capital city of Canterlot for the twenty first day... yada yada yada... Cordially extends an invitation to Ethan Mason and one guest."

He grunted. "She really went all out on this one, didn't she?"

I was about to respond, until Applejack cried out in my ear. "THE GRAND GALLOPING GALA!"

Rex began to dig earwax out of his ear while speaking. "Could you mares get anymore louder?!" He then burped up two tickets, and caught them. "And here are the two things that mares always beg for when they see you or me, Ethan."

I gave a nod as I took the tickets with my magic, and began to trot towards Ponyville. "Come on, Rex, We need to send Celestia a letter."

Just then Applejack spoke. "Ethan!" I glanced at her. "You know how great the Grand Galloping Gala is?"

I sighed heavily. "No, but I bet you're going to tell me."

She quickly hopped over to me, following me towards town. "It's a heap good more than just nice, Ah can tell y'all that! Ah'd love to go! Land's sakes! If I had an apple stand set up, ponies would chawing our tasty vittles till the cows came home. Do you have any idea how much business I could drum up for Sweet Apple Acres? Why, with all that money, we could do a heap of fixin' up 'round here. We could replace that saggy, old roof. And Big Macintosh could replace that saggy, old plow. And Granny Smith could replace that saggy, old hip." She stared into the sky. "Why, Ah'd give my left hind leg to go to that Gala."

I rolled my eyes as we were really close to Ponyville now. "Yeah, well, just give me a little while and then you'll--"

"WHOA!"

I quickly rolled out of the way, while a rainbow blur crashed into Applejack. I then began to dust myself off while I heard Rainbow Dash's voice. "Are we talking about the Grand Galloping Gala?"

Applejack glared up at Rainbow while Rex was dusting off his scales. "Rainbow Dash! You told me you were too busy to help me harvest apples." She got to her hooves. "What were you busy doing? Spying?"

Rainbow turned her back on Applejack, and I heard that cute crack in her voice. "No, I was busy napping."

Rex let out a small chuckle. "I should've figured, given that rainbow tail hanging from that tree branch."

Dash then continued as her face was close to mine. "And I just happened to hear that you have an extra ticket?"

I smiled slightly. "You smell nice, different shampoo I take it?" She blushed madly, but didn't back down. "Yes, I do, and--"

Rainbow interrupted me. "YES! This is so awesome!" She then got in my face again, and I smelt that nice shampoo. "The Wonderbolts perform at the Grand Galloping Gala every year!" She stared up in the sky, like Applejack did. "I can see i it now., everypony would be watching the sky, their eyes riveted on the Wonderbolts. But then, in would fly RAINBOW DASH! I would draw their attention with my super speed strut, then I would mesmerize them with my fantastic filly flash! And for my grand ffinal, the Buccaneer Blaze. The ponies would go wild! The Wonderbolts would insist that my signature moves be incorporated into their routine, and then welcome me as their newest member."

I stepped back as she got closer. "Don't you see, Ethan? This could be my one chance to show 'em my stuff." She was then a bit too close. "You gotta take me!"

I gave a soft smile. "Really? Well, it just so happens I will be revealing one of my greatest inventions to the party as well, though I still need to work on it a bit." I then placed a hoof on her forehead and pushed her back a bit. "Now, what I was going to say is--"

Applejack then dragged Rainbow away from me. "Hold on just one pony-pickin' minute here." She spat out Rainbow's tail, and glared at her. "I asked for that ticket first."

I sighed at this. "Girls, if you'll let me explain---"

"So? That doesn't mean you own it."

I began to rub my temples. "Would you both just listen for a---"

"Oh yeah? Well, I challenge you to a hoof wrestle. Winner gets the ticket."

They then pressed their forelegs on a nearby stump, and started hoof wrestling. This made me sigh and look at Rex. "Please stall them while I try to get this fixed."

Rex nodded. "Sure thing, Ethan." He then walked over to the girls, and pushed them apart. "Ladies, please, just hold on a minute." He then folded his arms. "Ethan will deal with this, alright? Just give him a few minutes and--"

They pushed him away and got back to a hoof wrestle, making Rex growl, while I had finally gotten far enough away to not hear them anymore. I then gave a grunt as I thought a bit. 'Sweet Lord, I really need to send a letter to Celestia, before this gets out of hand.'

Just then I heard something at high speed heading for me, making me stiffen up, and was rammed into by a pink blur.

I let out a groan as I heard Pinkie cry out. "AAH! Bats! Bats on my face! HELP!" I bit on the tickets that fell on the ground. "Wait! These aren't..." Her entire face lit up. "Tickets to the Grand Galloping Gala?!" She then began to rant as I stuffed the tickets in my mane. "It's the most amazing, incredible, tremendous, super, wonderful, terrifically humongous party in all of Equestria! I've always, always, always wanted to go!"

She then began to sing.

"Oh, the Grand Galloping Gala is the best place for me."

I sighed heavily. "Pinkie--"

"Oh, the Grand Galloping Gala is the best place for me.

Hip, Hip, Hooray."

"Pinkie."

"It's the best place for me, for Pinkie.

With decorations like streamers and fairy lights.

And pinwheels and pinatas and pincushions?

With goodies like sugar cubes and sugar canes and sundaes

and sunbeams and sarsaparilla?

and I get to play my favoritist of favorite fantabulous games

like pin the tail on the pony!"

"PINKIE!"

She stopped in her tracks, and fell face first in the ground.

"I get it, you really, really, really wanna go. Now, just let me explain something--"

Pinkie began bouncing around me. "Oh, thank you, Ethan! It's the most wonderfullest gift ever." She was then close to my face, closer then even Rainbow.

"I think you were never told of personal space." She pulled back. "Now, as I was going to say--"

I then heard Rarity gasp as she pulled the tickets out of my mane with her magic. "Are these what I think they are?"

"Hold on, I--"

Pinkie interrupted me, making this the tenth time... I think. "Yes! Yes! Yes! Ethan's taking me to the Grand Galloping Gala in Canterlot!"

Rarity was smiling widely now. "The Gala?"

I groaned. 'Here we go again...'

"I design ensembles for the Gala every year." She then gave me a seductive smile. "But I've never had the opportunity to attend." She stared into the sky. "Oh, the society, the culture, the glamour. It's where I truly belong." She then grew sparkles in her eyes. "And where I'm destined to meet HIM!"

"HIM!" Pinkie then raised an eyebrow. "Who?"

Rarity gave me dreamy eyes. "HIM. I would stroll through the Gala, and everypony would wonder, 'Who is that mysterious mare?' They would never guess that I was just a simple pony from little old Ponyville. Why, I would cause such a sensation that I would be invited for an audience with Princess Celestia herself. And the Princess would be so taken with the style and elegance that she would introduce me to HIM! Her nephew... the most handsome, enligible unicorn stallion in Canterlot. Our eyes would meet, our hearts would melt, our courtship would be magnificent. He would ask for my hoof in marriage. And of course I would say, 'YES!!' We would have a royal wedding, befitting a princess, which is..." she giggled. "what I would become upon marrying him, the stallion of my dreams!"

She was then in my face. "Ethan! I simply cannot believe you would invite Pinkie Pie so she can party and prevent me from metting my true love. How could you?!" She then turned her back on me with a 'hmph!'

I scratched my head a bit. "You just love to dream, don't you?" She glared at me. "Look, just let me explain."

Just then a rabbit ran up and snatched a ticket from my magic, before scurrying off. This made me groan as it ran up to Fluttershy and held it in front of her eyes.

Fluttershy gasped. "Angel, these are perfect."

She then eeped as I snatched the ticket away with my magic. "Will anypony even listen while I try to explain--"

Fluttershy then interrupted me, making me groan loudly. "Um, excuse me, Ethan, I would just like to ask -- I mean, if it would be alright, if you haven't given it to somepony else --"

Rarity glared at Fluttershy. "You?! You want to go to the Gala?"

Fluttershy looked down. "Oh, no." The rabbit then kicked her. "I-I mean, yes. Or actually, kind of. You see..." She stared off into the sky, like everypony else. "It's not so much the Grand Galloping Gala as it is the wonderous private gated garden that surrounds the dance. The flowers are said to be the most beautiful and fragrant in all of Equestria. For the night of the Gala and that night alone will they all be in bloom.. And that's just the flora! Don't get me started on the fauna. There's Loons and Toucans and Bitterns, oh, my! Hummingbirds that can really hum and buzzards that can really buzz! Blue Jays and Red Jays and Green Jays, Pink Jays and Pink Flamingos."

I stepped back. "Now I'm getting tired of this, now listen and--"

"Wait just a minute!"

I groaned and looked up to see Rainbow Dash, with Rex hanging tightly onto her tail, terror in his face. He's afraid of heights, just so you know.

I looked at Rainbow. "Were you following me?"

She hopped down, a large blush on her face. "No, I mean, yes, I mean, maybe." She huffed and got in my face. "Look, it doesn't matter, I couldn't risk a goody-four-shoes like you giving that ticket away to just anypony!"

I rolled my eyes as Rex began kissing the ground. "Look, I--"

"Wait just another minute."

I growled slightly. "Applejack, were you following me, too?"

She shook her head. "No, I was following this one." At least she's being honest. "To make sure she didn't try any funny business. Still trying to take my ticket."

"Oh give me a b--"

"Your ticket?!"

"But Ethan's taking me!"

They all began shouting at each other now, before I felt my blood begin to boil, and I cried out. "SHUT IT!!!!"

Everypony (except Pinkie) stopped speaking. "And then I said 'Oatmeal? Are you crazy--' Oh..."

I took a few calming breaths. "Now, all of you listen very closely, I have to send a letter to Celestia, and once I'm done, I will tell you what my plan is. Now if you'll all excuse me, I am getting tired of all of your pointless arguing!" I then stomped my hoof and stormed off to the library, with Rex close behind.

...

Instead of going to the library, I found myself outside a restaurant with Rex across from me, and a menu in my hooves.

Rex then spoke. "So, about the whole letter to Celestia..."

I sighed heavily. "I just need to get the girls out of my head and fill my stomach first, then I'll send the letter."

A waiter then came up to us. "Have you decided yet?"

I thought for a minute. "Hmm... I'm craving something filling, how about your number one dish, sir?"

He nodded. "At once, and you?"

Rex scratched his neck. "Hmm... how about a salad, and hold off on the flowers and stuff."

The waiter nodded and walked off. I then looked at Rex. "If we only had the one, who would you choose?"

Rex shrugged as he pulled out his Ipod. "Beats me, personally they all need to chill out. It's not going to be the last one, and I mean, we got our whole lives to do something worthwhile, instead of some royal party. plus, doesn't it always end badly?"

I nodded. "Yeah, every year we attended it ended badly, last year Blueblood threw a massive fit, and fired off a good amount of servants, and I mean good ones. I'd hate to deal with that again."

Rex gave a nod as well. "No kidding, Blueblood is a little uptight, but I'm sure he could be a great stallion, so long as he left his snob attitude at home."

We both shared a chuckle at this, and our food was soon brought to us. Rex's salad was well mixed and looked quite good, while I got a beautiful plate of roasted vegetables, and flowers on the side.

I smiled at my food, and gave a nod to the waiter, using my magic to place twenty bits in his hoof. "Thank you, good sir, and keep that tip."

He gave a bow. "Of course, thank you."

I nodded, since I quickly became friends with him before yesterday ended, and took a small bite of my food.

Just then most of the ponies ran past us, while the waiter spoke. "Sir, are you going to eat in the rain?"

I raised an eyebrow, and looked around, seeing that the rain was hitting everywhere except my location. This made me sigh heavily. "Let me guess, Rainbow Dash is above us?"

Rex nodded as he ate some of his salad. "Yep."

I looked up and saw Rainbow while she spoke. "Hi, there, best friend forever I've ever, ever had."

I took another bite of my dish, then swallowed. "Rainbow, if you're trying to ask me out on a date or something, it doesn't work that way."

Her entire face went red from her blush. "W-W-Wha... Oh... i... Uh..."

I sighed heavily. "It was just a joke, Rainbow." She let out an awkward chuckle. "What are you doing?"

"What do you mean? I just saw the smartest, most generous pony about to get rained on," Her blush was getting redder as she went on. "So I thought I'd kick a hole in the clouds to keep him dry so he could dine in peace. That's all."

I gave a snort at this. "Yeah, I would rather it kept raining."

Rainbow sighed. "Fine." And with that, she closed the cloud.

I took a few more bites before the rain hit the food, and sighed softly while Rex began to cover his head from the rain.

Then I heard Rarity. "Ethan, it's raining."

Rex gave her an annoyed look. "No, really? I would never have guessed!" He then snarled and flipped her off.

Rarity then grabbed my shoulder, and pulled me away while speaking. "Come with me before you catch a cold!"

...

I shook the water off my body as I stood in the Carousel Boutique, then let out a calm sigh, before speaking. "Sorry, Rarity."

I looked back to see her drenched now. She simply gave me a large smile. "Oh no, it's quite alright! After all," She got WAY too close to my face, muzzles almost touching, and a innocent smile. "the best of friends, are we not?" She then pulled back a little. "And you know what the best of friends do."

I spoke at that. "They all get too close to someponies personal space, which I would rather have some space over that."

She shook her head. "No, MAKEOVER!"

My pupils shrunk as my whole body went cold, like a deer in front of headlights. I then spun around quickly and bolted for the door, and rammed right out of said door, galloping as fast as I could from the place.

I could hear Rex behind me crying out. "YOU TRAITOR!!!"

I simply shook my head and kept running.

Just then I tripped on something, and crashed into the ground face first. This made me sit up, cough out some mud, and spoke. "Sorry about that."

I then felt a hoof grab me, and dragged me away while I heard AJ's voice. "Ah heard y'all've been needin' lunch. And boy to Ah got the spot fer y'all."

She then plopped me down in front of a wagon full of apple products. I smacked myself with my hoof. "This has to be a bad dream."

Applejack began to name off all the food, before putting a pie in front of me while speaking. "What do y' say, Best Friend?"

I narrowed my eyes at her, and turned my back to her. "No thanks, I already ate. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going home to send that letter to Celestia now."

...

I sighed as I came up to my front door. "Oh man, I hope Rex won't be mad." I then pushed the door open, and spotted Fluttershy humming as she cleaned the bookshelves. This made me sigh. "And of course Fluttershy would do the same."

She went wide eyed upon hearing me. "Oh! Well, hello, Ethan. I hope you don't mind,  but I've done a little spring cleaning for you."

I sighed. "Something tells me that doesn't involve Spring."

She looked around a little. "Oh, well, better late then never, right? It was Angel's idea."

I looked over and spotted that demon rabbit making a salad. "You're not doing this for the ticket, because I already told you all--"

Fluttershy interrupted me. "Oh, no! I'm doing this because you're my Very Best Friend, right, Angel?" Angel was glaring at her now. "Yes, we are just doing this for the ticket."

The rabbit slid to me, with the salad in his paws, which made me sigh heavily, and push him to the side. "No, I heard the same thing from Rainbow Dash, Rarity, and Applejack. I don't intend on giving the ticket to anypony. Now please leave."

"But--"

"NOW!"

Fluttershy eeped and quickly left, with Angel close by.

I sighed heavily, and looked out the door, causing confetti to shoot out into the library. Oh for Fuck's sake! Pinkie then grabbed my hoof and dragged me out of the house, before she began singing, which I immediately tuned out. Then, after much annoyance, I looked at Pinkie. "Just stop." She did. "Now, i can take the other girls' trying, and I'll say it now, they were subtle. But you?! This ticket is a--"

"Wait, what ticket?" "What Gala?"

Pinkie looked at the large crowd. "Oh, you didn't know? Ethan has an extra ticket to the Grand Galloping Gala!"

Fuck.

Unison "GRAND GALLOPING GALA?!"

I could see them all giving me compliments now as I could feel blood pulsing from my forehead. I then got to my hooves, and galloped faster then ever before. They were everywhere! Left and right, ahead and behind, they were relentless and all of them wanted that ticket! I would hide in a pile of hay, and the next thing I know, a pony's face would be in mine. I couldn't get away from them!

Eventually they all cornered me in an alley, making me scream out in rage, and my horn went off, before I found myself back in the library. This made me sigh heavily, until I heard a door open, and saw Rex in a very adorable shirt, with a wig, and he was fuming.

He stomped over to me, pointed his claw in my face, and spoke with much rage. "YOU! You fucked up, asshole of a son of a bitch, going so far as to abandon me at Rarity's! Do you know what she fucking put me through?! I NEVER FELT SO HUMILIATED!"

My ears went back as I sighed. "Sorry, Rex, I just... I can't let go the memories my mane holds, with Dad gone and then the Enclave almost killing me, I just wasn't ready to let go."

Rex let out a small sigh. "Alright, Ethan... just don't leave me there next time you run."

I nodded. "Alright." I then looked at him. "Come on, we need to lock the doors, before the ponies get here."

Rex nodded and we went to work.

...Eight Minutes Later...

I let out a soft sigh as everything was locked, and the lights were turned off. I then looked at Rex. "Think we're safe?"

Just then the lights went on, and the five girls stood across the room, making Rex groan. "No..."

I sighed heavily, got to my hooves, and stomped over to the girls. "Alright, THAT'S IT! I was trying to keep this a surprise so you'd all be happy, but now I am just pissed off, and I am very temped to not go with a single one of you! Hell, I won't even go myself!"

Their ears went behind their heads as Pinkie spoke. "W-W-What was the surprise?"

I narrowed my eyes at her. "I WAS going to send a letter to Celestia, saying to either send tickets for all of us, or I wasn't going, but now I am really tempted to just say FUCK IT and burn the tickets now to get it over with!"

They all gasped in unison. "NO!!"

"Give me one good reason, one GOOD fucking reason why I should still get the tickets?"

They looked between each other, then sighed heavily as Applejack stepped forward, and spoke. "Ah'm sorry, Ethan. Ah should have just listened t' y'all. Ah apologize."

Rarity did as well. "I am sorry too, I was just... so excited to meet HIM, that it got the better of me."

Then Fluttershy. "I'm really, really, really sorry."

Rainbow. "Yeah, I'm s... s... s... sorry, too."

Finally Pinkie. "If it'll make you feel better, I'll give you a super duper big hug."

I stared at all of them, and couldn't help but shake my head, losing my anger at their puppy eyes. Then I sighed. "Alright, just let me explain from now on, and I'll get the tickets."

They all agreed, making me look at Rex. "You ready to send the letter?"

Rex nodded, pulled out paper and a pen, and wrote down my words.

"Dear Princess Celestia

You know I don't like it when you play this prank on me.

As always, I will not accept this ticket without my friends.

Something tells me you already knew this, and was testing me.

For that I say 'please don't do that again.'

Your Faithful Student."

Rex nodded, opened a window, and blew the note on fire, before he folded his arms, then let out a small burp, before catching the letter, and opened it to begin reading.

"My Faithful Student Ethan,

You used to be so fun when it came to stuff like this.

I hardly get to do that many pranks here in the palace.

Anyways, I will be sending the tickets to you now.

And do try to lighten up a little.

Princess Celestia."

He then pulled out the six tickets, and handed them to the girls, making them all gasp and begin to cheer.

My stomach then growled, making Rarity speak. "Allow us to treat you to dinner."

I shrugged and headed out the door with the other five girls,

Just then Rex cried out from the Library. "SERIOUSLY?! WHY DO I HAVE TO GO?!"

I couldn't help but chuckle lightly.