"FUCK! WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED!?!??!" Andrew awoke, thrashing around and yelling. He rubbed his head as he stood up. "Where the fuu..." he asked idly, rubbing his head. He was in the middle of a dirt path, surrounded by a lusciously unrealistic line of trees, and he had a bruise on the side of his body. "Fuck this hurts ... But wait ... Light, teleportation ... Wha?" he wondered. He looked at his surroundings and laughed nervously. "This has to be some kind of joke." he said, until the breeze passed his face.

Fresh.

Crisp.

Clean.

Air.

He snapped to attention. "WHAT THE FUCK!!?" he yelled, drawing his combat knife. He calmed down quickly. "I don't know where I am. Okay. I also don't know what kind of sick joke this is. I could be hours or minutes away from the nearest town and not even know it! Or I could be in the middle of fucking nowhere! But how in the fuck should I know that because I'M FUCKING LOST!!!!!!!!!!" he yelled once again. "Okay I gotta seriously calm down ..." he said, sitting down. "Alright. I already know that I'm lost, in a forest, don't know how I got here, I remember a bright light, whoosh, I was falling, and now ... I'm here." he counted off events from each of his fingers.

"But I don't know where here is." he said to himself, scratching his head. "May as well either stay here or go north ... Which ever direction north is ... Isn't that a rule? If you're lost, head north? I don't fuckin' know." he said, tossing a stick into the bush. He rubbed his head again, "I shouldn't sit here and wait. Not like anybody's gonna come and rescue me." he said, stretching as he go up, wincing at his bruise. "How hard did I ... Wait ... If I reached terminal velocity, my bones would have crushed on impact when I hit the ground. Either I was abducted by aliens, this is a dream, or some kinda' sorcery." he wondered his decisions aloud.

Andrew attempted to peer into the thick foliage that surrounded the path, but came to no avail, seeing as far as at least twenty feet. "Hmm. Unoccupied forest, unusual ... But whatever ... How I get out is the only thing I need to worry about I guess, so I'll see which direction is north." he said, scanning the trees. They seemed to be ... 'Cartooned' ... In a way that made this all the more less believable the situation he is in is.

Andrew laughed to himself nervously, "This is too unrealistic ... Obviously a dream ..." he pinched himself. Harder than he intended to. "FUCKING CHRIST!!!!!!!!" he yelled. "Not a dream ... 'The fuck?!!" he yelled. He looked up to see that the trees were apple trees. "Humph." he said, pulling one apple off, taking a bite. "Mm. Not like the ones back home. Eh, best fresh and cold I guess." he said. "Man I'm starving ..."

* * * * * * * * * * * *

6:59 PM

AppleJack, the orange farmpony at Sweet Apple Acres, was doing her job, out in the fields, bucking apple trees. Big Macintosh wasn't too far from her, doing the same. "Hey Big Macintosh! Ah'm gonna go take this here apple wagon back to the barn to load er' off, alright?!" she called out.

"Eeyup!" her brother called back.

As AppleJack crossed the apple fields, she heard a distant yet close humming. "What's this? Big Macintosh shouldn't be this far ahead already. We ain't got nopony else ta' help us, Ah don't think ..?" AppleJack thought aloud.

Crunch.

AppleJack recognized this sound as the all-too familiar sound of an apple being eaten. This made her angry. She unlatched herself from the wagon full of apples and softly dropped it to the ground. Her family's hard work and dedication being plucked off of the trees they grew on ... One at a time ... AppleJack was enraged. She stomped angrily towards the sound.

* * * * * * * * * * * *

Andrew was eating apple by apple, up to three now. "These are delicious ..." he thought aloud. Even though they were simple fruits, he enjoyed how fresh, cool, succulent and crisp they were. He enjoyed every last bit of the apples. He then heard the faint clip-clop of hooves, and a very distant kicking noise. He hid behind a tree, drawing his combat knife, munching on an apple. 'If it's a person, it'll be fine. If it's a stray horse, eh, it'll be fine as well.' he thought to himself.

* * * * * * * * * * * *

34 minutes later, 7:33 PM.

AppleJack finally reached the source of the sound. She saw a half-eaten apple roll out into the open from behind a tree. The sudden stop concerned AppleJack, who calmed down. "Hello? Anypony there?" she asked curiously.

A voice returned, "Yeah, I'm here." the voice was deep. She couldn't see who said it.

"Where are ya' sugarcube? Ya' mind not eatin' my darn apple fields either?!" she angrily asked.

"Oops, sorry. I didn't know that this was your apple field." the voice came back.

"Come out." she demanded, unamused.

"Alright I'll come out."

"Well ... Get yer' dang flank out here!" she angrily demanded.

The creature that made the voice stepped out, and AppleJack gasped and fell on her flank. She definitely didn't know what to think of him.

"What in the hay are you?!" she asked, dumbfounded. The creature fell over laughing as soon as it saw her. "What? Y'all think Ah'm funny er' sumthin?!"

The creature stopped laughing, "I'm ... Talking ... To a miniscule, talking ... Cowboy-hat-wearing HORSE!" and it burst out laughing again.

"Will y'all calm the buck down!?" AppleJack asked.

"O-kay o-okay fine ..." the creature let out a sigh as it stood up. "I'll answer your question. I'm a human."

"Ah hu-what?"

"A human!"

"Ah human? Ah've never heard of such ah thing." AppleJack was confused.

"I've never seen a horse like you before." the creature giggled.

"Ah'm a pony. Not ah horse. Ah pony." AppleJack facehoofed.

"Well that makes sense ... You're smaller than a horse ..." the human said.

"What? Are ponies different from where you're from?" AppleJack asked.

"Yeah, for one they don't have tattoos on their ... Flanks ... They don't wear hats, they don't put their hair in a pony-tail, and overall, they can't talk ... Have I been drugged?!" the human asked worriedly. He pointed an accusing finger at AppleJack, "You're not real!" he said.

"Sugarcube, Ah'm real alright." she said, taking his finger with her hoof. The human looked surprised. It looked like it's mind broke or something. "You alright there?"

"One question ..."

"Shoot."

"WHERE IN THE FLYING FUCK AM I!?!?!?"

* * * * * * * * * * * *

"Calm down, sugarcube!" AppleJack put a hoof on the curled-up human, who seemed to be going insane. "What's gotten into ya?!" she asked.

"I AM TALKING TO A HORSE, AND IT'S NOT A DREAM!!!" it exclaimed, making AppleJack jump.

AppleJack took both hooves, one to one side of the human's face, one a little far from the other side, and slapped it in the face with her hoof, snapping the sense back into the human.

"... If you weren't a lady, I would have cut off your tail." the human said, standing up. "Alright ... Where am I?"

"You're in mah families' Sweet Apple Acres." AppleJack replied.

"Sorry, I didn't know this was your property."

"No, no, it's fine sugarcube, Ah was just worried when Ah saw y'all gettin' crazy right there." AppleJack replied.

"I was just confused. Where exactly am I?" the human asked.

"Y'all are in Equestria."

"Equestria? What ..."

"Equestria. Are you not from 'round here?" AppleJack asked.

"Of course not. I saw the fibers of space and time rip before my eyes as I plummeted to my doom, or ... Here." he looked at AppleJack. "What is your name?"

"Oh, well Ah haven't properly introduced mahself, sorry! Ah'm AppleJack!" she shook his hand with her hoof. "Whats yer' name?"

"Andrew, please, call me Andy." Andy replied.

"Y'all got a nice name there, Andy." AppleJack complimented. She noticed the black leather strap by his side, holding some foreign object. She pointed to it, "What's that thing?" she asked.

Andrew looked down. "Oh, that? It's a gun."

"A gun?"

"Yeah. A gun."

"What the buck is a gun?"

"Let me show you. Don't be scared, this will be loud." Andrew revealed the black pistol. "Cover your ears." he said, and AppleJack complied. Andrew squeezed the trigger, firing a bullet into the ground. AppleJack went wide-eyed.

"Oh mah stars! What does that thing do?"

"It's a weapon of self defense back on my planet, AppleJack. Don't worry though, I wouldn't use it on anybody. Here, you can take it." Andrew replied, giving the gun to AppleJack.

"Good idea-" AppleJack was interrupted when a certain lavender unicorn ran to them.

"AppleJack! Did you see the light last night? I casted a spell and I think it wo..." the unicorn gasped as she saw the human.

"Twi', it's fine. He's friendly. His name's Andrew." AppleJack said. Twilight lightened up after this.

"O-ok ... W-well I think h-h-he's the thing that I summoned ..." she said, stuttering.

"You brought me here? Thanks." Andrew said, giving a sincere smile.

"Are you being sarcastic?" Twilight asked.

"He ain't Twilight, and Ah know it. Remember, honesty?" AppleJack shot Twilight a 'You can't say shit about it' look.

"Oh, yeah, sorry ... Forgot ... Well, uh, h-hi! My name is Twilight Sparkle." Twilight introduced. "May I ask why you're thankful I brought you here?" she asked, eyeing him up and down, visually scanning him.

"Well, I was about to be sent to prison for something I didn't do. You saved me, technically. I don't know if what I'm about to do is safe, but I don't care." Andrew lifted Twilight into a friendly hug, which made her blush through her fur. He put her down. "Thanks." he shot her a sincere and soft smile.

"Y-you're welcome." Twilight's face was flushed.

"Your turn, AppleJack. You made her not afraid of me." he giggled.

"Oh no ..!" AppleJack stood up, but she was plucked from the ground, and like Twilight, was given a friendly hug. She blushed too.

"Sorry if I made an awkward moment, just needed to get that outta me. So why are we still here?" Andrew asked. 'Geez, ponies are soft ...' he thought in the back of his mind.

"Oh mah, sorry! Let's get back ta' the farmhouse." AppleJack said.

* * * * * * * * * * * *

1 Hour Later ... 8:58 PM

As the trio arrived to the farmhouse, Twilight parted ways with them, then Andrew and AppleJack entered the farmhouse. "Go 'head and make yerself at home." AppleJack said, pointing him upstairs.

"Thanks again, AppleJack." Andrew said. He walked up the stairs to go into a room.

* * * * * * * * * * * * Switching from Third person narrative to First.

As I opened the door, I was deaf and blind to hear the tiny voices inside, but eventually I heard them, and saw 3 little, colorful, cute fillies, who froze in mid-conversation. As soon as they saw me, they went wide-eyed. They defied the laws of physics by literally teleporting, or moving so fast that they made a blur when they moved, straight in front of me. I stepped back. Their eyes were so large ... Jesus.

"OH MAH GOSH WHAT IS IT!?!" the yellow coated one with a red bow in her mane asked.

"COOL!" the orange coated one exclaimed, flapping her wings, which made an adorable buzzing sound.

The third one just stood there in shock.

"Calm down all of you!" I laughed. They stopped talking. "Hi. My name's Andy." I reached a hand out, and they looked confusedly at my hand. The orange coated one nuzzled my hand, and I withdrew. "Er ... What are your names?" I asked.

"Ah'm AppleBloom!" the yellow coated one exclaimed.

"I'm Scootaloo!" the orange coated one said.

"I'm Sweetie Belle." the pale lavender (Possibly white) coated filly introduced.

AppleBloom spoke up, "What are you?" she asked.

"Why I'm a human!" I said. "I met a pony named AppleJack out in the apple orchard when I came here. Any of you know her?" I asked.

The two other fillies aside from AppleBloom exclaimed, "She's her sister!" they pointed at AppleBloom.

"Oh. Relevance in names, I could have understood that in a heartbeat, sorry girls! I'll let you continue with your business." I patted them on their manes, turned back, and a smiling AppleJack was looking at me. I closed the door. "Sweet group of fillies you have there. They're having a slumber party I'm assuming?" I asked.

"Yes. They have one at least eh ... Ah don't know, once every two weeks or so." AppleJack said. "Ah'll show y'all to your room if y'all like." she offered.

"Oh, thanks AppleJack." I said, rubbing her mane. "Jeez, I still haven't a clue why I'm taking this so easily ... I was in a war, I've seen everything ... Up until now." I said. "What shampoo do you use? All of your manes are SO. SOFT!" I exclaimed, rubbing her mane. AppleJack blushed.

"Ah personally use 'Sexy Mane'. Thanks for the compliment, though, darlin'." AppleJack said, shooting me a sultry look. "Why are y'all dressed up like that? Take your clothes off." she gestured for me to take my garments off.

I blushed and giggled, "I don't think that'd be wise." I said.

"Why not? We don't wear clothes ..." AppleJack said.

"Humans have to, it's a law. And we're furthermore exposed than you all, no offence." I said.

"Oh Ah see.So Ah guess you're sayin' your stallionhood would be visible to anypony?" AppleJack asked.

"Well when you put it that way ... Yeah ... Pretty much." I blushed.

"Oh, sorry 'bout that sugarcube, now y'all need ta' get some rest Ah reckon." AppleJack nuzzled me into a room. It had a bed, window, dresser, all the usual stuff.

"No problem. *Yawn* Thanks AppleJack." I said, hopping onto the bed.

"Wait ah second ... We don't have ah guest room ... Ah guess you'll have to share with me." AppleJack blushed, taking her hat off. Her mane was blonde and long, and had a red ribbon that wrapped around it, giving her a pony-tail/braided look. "Are y'all alright with that?" she asked.

"I guess so." I said, stripping to my boxers. I felt awkward, but since AppleJack (Along with every other pony I'd assume) doesn't wear clothes, she just hopped into bed. The bed, thankfully, was enough to hold both of us. I climbed in with her. I guess the feeling of awkwardness was mutual for a while, until me and AppleJack were so tired that she cuddled up with me, putting her hooves around me. She had fallen to sleep. I was still awake, but I soon followed her.

Hope all of you who are reading are enjoying!

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