Spike dragged his suitcase through the streets of Ponyville, looking lost and forlorn. Anypony that was in earshot would have heard him talking to himself, and snatches of a conversation along the lines of "After all I've done for her..." and "Ungrateful little...".

The other ponies passing by stared at him with curiosity, for it was rare indeed to see Spike without Twilight (not everyone had heard he'd been sacked yet). Judging by his demeanor though, he wasn't in the best of moods, so they wisely kept their distance.

He approached Fluttershy's cottage, with it's many birdhouses and leafy roof. He hesitated for a minute, before knocking on the door lightly. (The yellow pegasus was known for being startled for the slightest thing).

After a few minutes wait, the door opened.. and the the lady of the house herself emerged. And she was covered, from head to hoof, in birds.

"Oh, my" She seemed flustered. "I was expecting you a bit later Spike. I was in the middle of feeding my feathered friends here." "They get ever so hungry this time of year."

The dragon backed away slightly, scared that the many feathers flying around might set off another deadly sneezing fit. "Uh, sorry to have disturbed you, Flutters. I can come back later..."

"No, no..." Fluttershy insisted, getting behind Spike and literally pushing him through the door. "No trouble at all. In fact, you could really be useful."

"USEFUL?!" Spike's ears immediately perked up at that word. Finally, SOMEONE who could appreciate him. "What is it you want me to do? Send a message to Celestia? Rescue an animal in distress?  Cook you a delicious dinner? Whatever you want, SPIKE'S YOUR DRAGON!!" He accompanied this speech with a little curtsy.

The shy pegasus chuckled at his bravura. "No, silly. Twi told me what a great cleaner you are, so I just wondered if you wouldn't mind..." She gestured to the floor with one of her wings.

Now, (SOUND OF FOURTH WALL BREAKING) anyone who's been to Trafalgar Square in good olde London Town (before they were banned by the killjoy council) will know just how messy pigeons can be. (SOUND OF FOURTH WALL REASSEMBLING)

Fluttershy's pets were no different, and the floor was a nice shade of white. In fact, Spike was actually standing in the middle of a pile of doo-doo. Looking down, he cringed, and instinctively stepped back... and slipped... with his face being immersed in the charming pile of animal excrement.

"Oh, dear". Fluttershy put a hoof to her mouth. "My apologies Spike, I should have warned you" The dragon stealthily picked himself up, resembling Apple Bloom on the last Nightmare Moon night. She'd gone dressed at a ghost, BTW.

"You'd better get yourself cleaned up out back." Fluttershy hastily filled a bucket of water and gave it to the dragon, adding a bar of soap for good measure." And when you've finished doing that, I'll give you a mop and you can use the same bucket to wipe the floor. Thank you, Spike. I know we'll have lots of fun together." She gave him a sheepish grin and flew off with her birds, leaving him  to do her 'dirty work'. Ha, ha.

Grumbling to himself, Spike picked himself and whatever dignity he had left off the floor, and grabbed the cleaning implements before heading outside. "Why does everything always go wrong for me? Am I just some kind of cosmic joke?" He looked up at the sky, as if expecting an answer, but none appeared to be forthcoming. So with a huge sigh, he got into the pail, and started washing his back, all alone in the world.

Except, he wasn't REALLY alone. For, a dastardly figure was watching him from the ajar back door, small in stature but brimming in evil intent, a creature from the fiery pits of Tartarus itself, a white rabbit known only as ANGEL BUNNY was rubbing his paws together. Ooh, the plans he had in store for that dragon!

If you looked closely, at that very moment, you may have seen Angel's ears turn into devil's horns for a split second. Surely just a trick of the light... or was it?

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Meanwhile, poor Twilight had endured a tiring evening/morning. Not only had she had to drink the entire supply of coffee at Sugarcube Corner so she could stay up all night to reproduce her week's schedule, but she'd forgotten to ask Spike where he'd kept everything for her before he'd departed in a huff. So, it had taken her an hour to have breakfast, and another thirty minutes to find the book she wanted. Which, ironically enough, was called Organising Your Life.

And now, she found herself sitting by herself in her new swanky throne room, saying NEXT a lot.

Yes, the applicants to fill the new position had been flooding in... and it's fair to say, not a lot of them were much cop. She'd seen: Pinkie with a moustache, a minotaur with a serious ego problem, Pinkie Pie with a beard, A cross-eyed pegasus who almost broke her wall trying to exit, Pinkie Pie with a moustache AND beard ensemble...

In fact, she was ready to pack it all in, and forgive Spike for his recent transgressions. Sure, he'd screwed up a lot of late, but she'd known him since he'd hatched from a tiny egg, and surely that should count for something? Maybe she should take a leaf out of Rainbow Dash's book, and be more loyal. In fact, she should go round Fluttershy's right now and...

An Earth Pony walked in during the middle of the alicorn's deliberations. She had a purple mane and tail, with a blue cloth tied around her neck and three buttons for a cutie mark. She walked with a certain air of arrogance, and despite Twilight's royal status, was not afraid to walk up and nudge the alicorn out of her stupor.

"Hello? Anypony home" She said in a grating put-on voice. "HUH? Huh?!" Twilight swiftly returned to reality, and stared at the new mare in the room. "Er... hello? Are you here to enquire about the position?"

"Of course I am darling, Mkay?" She stated in that annoying tone. "I was just visiting my estranged daughter in this one pony town, and I couldn't believe my ears when I learned a princess lives in these backwaters. AND she was looking for help. You see, my fortunes have been a bit on the slide of late. I'm a world famous designer from Manehattan, but for some reason a lot of my old clients seem to have bailed on me, and my ungrateful assistant left me in the lurch. That horrible..."

"Please get to the point". Said Twilight, rolling her eyes slightly. She did not need to hear this pony's life story.

"Oh, Sorry darling." The purple haired mare said contritely."Sometimes, I do let my mouth run away with itself. Anyway, I was thinking we could help each other out, Mkay? I would do a few small menial tasks for you, and help you out with various other things. And in return, you could model a few of my fabulous outfits when we're out in public. I'm sure that, whatever reason my old clients had for leaving me, they'd all be begging for my services again when they found my creations were being worn than no less than a princess, Mkay?"

Twilight raised an eyebrow. Being a very modest individual, she didn't like the thought of anypony thinking she was something special just because of her new role. And besides, she already had a top fashion designer friend who she could turn to. Nevertheless this pony seemed nice enough. "What's your name" the alicorn asked.

This question drew a surprised reaction from the Earth Pony. She fidgeted from hoof to hoof, staring straight ahead. "Erm... It's ... Eram Olopirus" she said, after a moments hesitation.

Next Chapter: Where is a holy hand grenade when you need one?! Estimated time remaining: 6 Minutes