I've just remembered, as I resumed the game, that I have a mess to either clean up myself, or to help clean up. Most likely, I'll be cleaning it up myself. So, I head to where my character was first spawned, where I was assaulted by the three stallions.

Once I get there, I notice that the puddle of vomit hasn't been cleaned up, and the stallion ponies have long since left. That's the good news. The bad news is there is no cleaning equipment available, at least none that I can see.

As I maneuver around the now dry puddle of vomit and proceed to the center of Ponyville to search for a shop that might sell the equipment I need, I see the face of a dark-pink pony looking out at me from one of the windows.

The face disappears from view; and, as I continue on my way, the door to the house, which just happens to be the one facing the vomit puddle, opens, and the earth stallion comes out. Before I can go too much further, he calls out, “Hey, human, aren't you going to clean up that mess in front of my house?”

I can see he's pointing to the puddle of vomit.

My character turns to him, and I answer, “That was part of my plan. I just need to get some cleaning equipment first.”

The dark-pink stallion growls as he disappears into his house again, then comes out with a dust pan in his mouth. Even though I programmed the ponies to have an unusually high level of strength and accuracy, I'm still surprised at how close the stallion can throw the dust pan to my character. Again the stallion disappears into his house, then comes back out with a broom in his mouth. After also throwing that to my character, he calls out, “Here, use these!”

My character collects the utensils and turns to the dark-pink pony, and I say, “Thanks,” before also asking, “Do you also have a garbage can?”

Again the dark-pink stallion growls as he disappears into his house, something about humans being too demanding.

I direct my character back to the puddle of vomit, move the dust pan to one side of it, and attempt to scoop up the mess.

But, while the dust pan appears to be wide enough to handle the mess in maybe one or two scoops, the mess itself seems to have other ideas, as it proceeds to crumble and spread out. Evidently, my character's going to need the broom after all.

Then I hear the voice of the stallion directly in front of my character saying, “Here's the garbage container you asked for. Anything else you need or want?”

I have my character look up from the mess to the stallion's face as I answer, “No, that's fine. Thanks again.” And, with that, I have my character return to cleaning up the mess.

As my character continues the cleanup, I hear activity near him, and hear the voice I recognize as that of the unicorn asking, “What's that human doing?”

The earth pony asks, “Do you remember earlier when Emerald Hill emptied his stomach?” Evidently Emerald Hill is the name of the pegasus.

Presently I hear the unicorn answer, “Yeah, when that human told … his … story … “ After a moment of quiet, he, closer to the earth pony, based on what I can hear, adds, “This must be that human. Did he really come back to clean up the mess?”

Before the earth pony can answer, I hear the voice of the pegasus, Emerald Hill, ask, “What mess are you talking about, Stunts?”

The unicorn answers, “The mess you made yesterday when … “ Now I know the unicorn's name is Stunts. All I need now is the name of the earth pony.

In the mean time, Emerald Hill interrupts and says, “Yea, I remember. That human told that story about how … “ Before he can finish his answer, he makes gagging sounds, and it sounds like the sounds are being muffled, most likely with a hoof or a forelimb.

Just then, the earth pony says, “Emerald, don't even think it. As much as I'd like to see the human clean up more of the mess, I've seen enough for one lifetime of what you've eaten.”

I don't say anything, but, even though the effects don't include smell, I agree with the earth pony. The mess is difficult to clean up as it is. But, in spite of this mess's efforts to resist, my character manages to clean it up in a few minutes. As he stands up, I say, “There, it's finally done.”

Each of the ponies studies the spot, then the contents of the garbage container.

The pegasus can't help heaving into the garbage container, evidently recognizing the meal he couldn't keep in his stomach the day before, and being unable to keep the meal he'd most recently eaten.

I have my character reach out to the pegasus and start rubbing his back as I say, “I'm sorry about having to tell you that story, and making you make that mess. But, at least I cleaned it up.”

The earth stallion, evidently disgusted by the pegasus' lack of control, still manages to answer, “And, you did a good job of it.” Then, with a facial expression suggesting a change of heart, adds, “I may have been wrong about humans. You're not so bad after all.”

I open my mouth to accept the compliment, but I'm interrupted by Stunts, who agrees, “I didn't think I'd ever be saying this to a human, but you're welcome to come back anytime you want. You're worth having as a friend.”

I've forgotten what I was going to say to accept the earth stallion's compliment; all I can think to say is “Thanks.”

Then Emerald Hill looks up at me, and I can see, from the perspective of my character, tears in his eyes as he says, “Please forgive me for attacking you.” Then he leans into my character's chest with his head and starts sobbing.

I answer, “We're even now.” Not knowing what else to do, I have my character stroke the pegasus' yellow-green mane.

After a few minutes, a now dry-eyed Emerald Hill nudges my character's chin and says, “I'm fine now.”

I let him go, then proceed into the town again, this time with something else in mind.

Before I can move out of their hearing, I hear Stunts ask, “Berry Ground, do you really think all humans are like that one?” I'm guessing Berry Ground is the name of the earth pony.

My guess proves correct when the earth stallion answers, “I honestly don't know. But, you're right about that human. He is worth having as a friend.”

I smile as I continue on my way into town. It's just a few minutes before I find my character in an area of Ponyville with both indoor and outdoor stores, where I notice a strange feathered creature, perhaps a little bigger than the ponies around her, but I recognize her instantly. It's Rainbow Dash's griffon friend, Gilda, and she appears to be preparing to stir up some trouble.

Making sure not to draw the attention of the griffon, I maneuver my character around the buildings to a position behind her, as it appears she's preparing to attack an elderly mare. Before the griffon can touch her victim, I have my character step on her leonine tail.

Instantly, Gilda lets out a long, loud squawk as the feathers on her head and neck point out in self-defense.

Alarmed, the senior pony screams something about being under attack, turns away from the squawking griffon, and, calling retreat, strolls away in a panic.

In the mean time, Gilda turns to my character and screams, “Get off my tail!”

My character looks down to show me that Gilda's tail, under his foot, has been turning red. He then lifts his foot up and puts it down next to the tail, then looks at Gilda's face. At this point, I say, “Oh, that's your tail? I'm sorry. I didn't see it there.”

Gilda mockingly says, “I'm sorry, I didn't see your tail.” Then, glaring at my character, she pushes him by his chest into the street growling, “How could you not see my tail?”

I answer, “I guess I wasn't looking. So, are you alright?”

At first Gilda puts a clawed front foot on her forehead and sighs, then puts the claw down again and squawks, “Would it kill you to look down every once in a while? What a loser!”

I respond, “I think someone needs to take some anger-management classes.”

Now Gilda makes it clear she's reached her boiling point. After growling at my last statement for a second, she inhales, then expels a leonine roar in my face.

I seem to remember that, when this happened to Fluttershy, she ran off crying, having failed at guiding a family of ducks through Ponyville. I choose to have a different reaction, though. As my character holds his ground, I say, “Well, when you put it that way,” then proceed to inhale.

I can only guess it's because I stood my ground and didn't run off that Gilda is getting that worried look on her face.

Now I proceed to roar back at Gilda, not as deep as her roar, but longer, ten seconds at most, and I have my character rotate his head right and left.

In reality, I'd expect a griffon to either roar back, or attack me. And, while this isn't reality, I still find it surprising that Gilda frowns with her eyes but manages to smile with her beak, then squeaks, then turns and flies off.

My character stands there, and for a few seconds I say nothing. When I do speak, I ask, “Did I just win a roaring contest against a griffon?”

From somewhere behind my character, I hear Pinkie Pie snicker, “I don't know, but I think she left something for you.”

My character looks behind him at Pinkie Pie, then back down where Gilda was. Sure enough, there's something that wasn't there before: evidently, I literally scared the poop out of her. I can't seem to go anywhere in Ponyville without causing some creature to make a mess of some kind. Well, deciding that I might as well clean this mess up before some pony can step in it, I proceed to ask if anyone has some cleaning utensils I can use. That's when my character puts his hands in the pockets of his pants and produces a small paper towel. After that, he covers the small pile of griffon dung and picks it up, wrapping it from underneath. At this point, my character looks down to show me that the mess has been fully contained in the paper towel.

Just then, I hear a quiet whisper from behind my character saying, “No, you're fine,” just as I notice evidence of a light tap on him.

He turns around, and all I can see, through his eyes, is the face of a yellow pony with a pink mane. I say, “I'm sorry. I didn't see you there. Are you alright?”

The fact that I couldn't hear what the yellow pegasa was saying suggests to me that she was saying exactly what I was saying, and at exactly the same time. And, yes, I recognize her as a pegasa, specifically Fluttershy.

As we stare at each other, I can hear Pinkie Pie now openly laughing. From her position, I hear her say, “That's the funniest thing I've ever heard!”

My character and Fluttershy simultaneously turn to look at the pink earth pony, then turn back to each other.

Fluttershy says, “I was just guiding this family of ducks through Ponyville. I guess I should've been looking where I was going.”

I answer, “That's alright. I was cleaning up a mess I'd caused.” As my character stands up, I add, “I'm guessing you weren't pointed where you were walking.”

Fluttershy answers, “Oh, no. I couldn't possibly take my eyes off the ducklings. What if one of them got hurt? I couldn't forgive myself if that happened.”

This is the position I hoped to get into. I ask, “What if I lead the way? Do you think you could follow my voice walking backwards?”

Fluttershy stares at me and, after a momentary pause to think, asks, “You're a human, and you want to help me?”

Presently I hear Pinkie Pie stop laughing. I can only guess it was either my offer or Fluttershy's question that caught the pink pony off guard.

I answer, “It's clear that you can't look behind you while you walk backwards. My choices seem to be clear: either help you out, or leave you alone to bump into maybe everything and every pony in town.”

Fluttershy, turning to the family of ducks, says under her breath, “How thoughtful.”

And, yes, surprisingly enough, I heard her say that.

My character looks at the family of ducks as Fluttershy also looks at them.

The beautifully-colored male, evidently the father, then the more plainly-colored female, evidently the mother, quack at the yellow pegasa.

Afterward, Fluttershy turns to my character and says, “Alright. Since you're offering, they agree. But, first you must promise not to eat any of them.”

Now, I know I've programmed the game to pause when I say the words “ki tahi au,” but I've also programmed it to unpause when I say the word “continue.” I'm also aware that, while even she will be frozen in position and no matter what unable to make use of such keywords, Pinkie Pie will still be aware of what I'm doing in the mean time. Still, the Maori promise will be most valuable to me. So, I say, “If I were to eat any of the ducks, it'd be one of the adults, and at that the male. But, having said that, I'm not hungry anyway. And besides, like I said to three stallions, I'm more interested in making friends of the creatures here than meals. So, I promise I won't eat any of the ducks. Ki tahi au.” Then, noticing that everything has frozen, I add, “Continue.”

Presently Fluttershy says, “Oh, thank you. Now, go ahead.”

As my character turns away from the yellow pegasa and the family of waterfowl in front of her, I must admit I find myself thinking that all I need now is something to talk about until we're out of town. But, looking through my character's eyes at the somewhat-crowded road ahead, and considering Fluttershy has yet to let me know if we're headed in the right direction, I have to believe that we'll be fine.

Indeed, having my character maneuver around ponies, or requesting that this pony or that pony pause long enough to let a pegasa and a family of ducks pass in front of them, or even informing Fluttershy that I plan to stop at one point or another, gives me plenty to say to keep the parade safe.

In the mean time, I can guess that Pinkie Pie has had to rethink her opinion of me. The way I have her programmed, she'll think she has to repent to me somehow, do something to tell me she wants me to forgive her. And, the way I have the game designed, this means that Rainbow Dash's griffon friend is in jeopardy. But, the way I have the game designed, Gilda's death is an important part of the story and how it'll evolve. But, I digress.

Back to leading the parade, my character successfully leads the group through the street to the outskirts of town. Once there, he turns to Fluttershy, and I ask, “Do you need me any further, or can you take it from here?”

Fluttershy turns to my character and answers, “Nopony ever offered to lead me through Ponyville. You're probably right in part of what you said. Maybe I would've been bumping into everything and everypony I couldn't see. Then again, there are times, you've shown me, when I might've lead this family of ducks to injury or death.” Now I see tears in the yellow pegasa's eyes, and her voice goes up an octave as she adds, “I didn't ask you for help before; but, if it's not too much of an imposition, could you lead us to my house? It's just along the pathway, and it'd insure we get there safely.”

I answer, “It'd be an honor.” Then, as my character looks ahead along the path to the forest, I notice nothing coming from there. I just need something to talk about until we get to Fluttershy's house.

Fortunately, Fluttershy has an idea. She says, “Since it seems there's nopony coming, maybe you can sing a song, or tell a story, so I can tell where you're going.”

At that invitation, I suddenly think of a story from the Bible, a story that seems somehow appropriate for this situation. So, as I start heading toward the forest, leading the band of pegasa and ducks, I start telling the story of a king and a prophet, giving the account based on my understanding of what I remember reading about it.

I find it surprising how much of an interest Fluttershy takes in the story; particularly how a prophet of God could be so impatient and not wait, as God had directed him, for the second delegation I mention to approach him before preparing to leave. I'm not surprised that she expresses sympathy for the prophet's donkey, who suffers abuse for rescuing her master each of three times from an angel ready to kill him. Yet, it surprises me that it surprises Fluttershy that a non-human creature like the donkey talking to a human such as the prophet is such a rare event. The yellow pegasa has some questions that she asks about the prophet not seeing that angel until that third time, then how he continues to follow the evil king to each of three places, and still blesses the group of fugitives from Egypt even though he was supposed to curse them.

We get to her home before we get to the end of my story, but the yellow pegasa refuses to let me go until I finish it. So, I tell her about the fate of the king and his people and the fallen prophet, a conclusion that doesn't seem to surprise Fluttershy after all I've said, and all the questions of hers I've answered.

Once I'm finished with my story, Fluttershy dismisses me to return to Ponyville, or whatever I intend to do next.

So, my character returns to Ponyville, to be met by Pinkie Pie on the outskirts of town.

The pink earth pony bounces around my character saying, “I want you to meet my friends at Sugar Cube Corner. I'm throwing a party for you and Gilda.”

It's the wrong time in the story for such an invitation to raise any suspicions for me. I know Gilda will be first to become an ingredient for cupcakes, and Pinkie Pie hasn't had enough time to do such a thing yet. I expect to meet the female griffon there, and maybe I can certify if I actually won that roaring contest with her. Or, maybe not. Either way, I'll experience a Pinkie Pie party, and I might just get the chance to meet those three stallions I've already befriended. So, I answer, “Sure. I'd consider it an honor.”

It surprises me how the pink pony can reach the altitudes she can reach while seeming to expend so little energy. But, such is the case as she bounces nearly into the clouds while calling out, “Great! I'll go get Fluttershy.” And, with that, she bounces off in the direction opposite my character.

So, my next destination is clear. My character makes his way into town and to Sugar Cube Corner.

Wouldn't you know it, I make it there just in time to meet Gilda at the door. My character opens the door and gestures for Gilda to enter as I say, “Ladies first.”

The female griffon glares at me and says, “And give you the chance to step on my tail again? I don't think so. Dweebs first.” With the last statement, Gilda mimics my character's gesture.

Again I have my character gesture for Gilda to enter, but this time I say nothing.

Seeing me gesture again and hearing me say nothing this time, Gilda glares more intensely and starts growling at me. Were she not doomed, I'm thinking she and I, or at least she and my character, would be destined to be best friends.

Before the female griffon has a chance to do more than growl, Rainbow Dash appears at the door and says, “Gilda! I'm glad you could make it!” Then she proceeds to pull the now reluctant griffon into the bakery.

Gilda resists long enough to point, with her free arm, two clawed digits at her eyes, then at me. After that, she allows Rainbow Dash to pull her through the door.

That's when Rainbow Dash sees me. Eying my character curiously, the azure pegasa with the multicolored mane asks, “Who are you, and what are you doing here?”

Before I can answer, Pinkie Pie pushes my character into the door saying, “Well, what are you waiting for? Get in there and enjoy yourself, silly.”

As my character stumbles into the bakery, the azure pegasa, who I recognize as Rainbow Dash, turns to the pink pony, then back at me, before saying, “So, you're a friend of Pinkie Pie.”

As my character regains his balance, I answer, “More or less. You may call me Mormon.”

From further inside, the voice of Gilda says, “Mormon, the human that roars.”

At this point, I don't bother to take off the mounted input device as I laugh aloud. After a few seconds, I regain my composure and say, “So, does that mean I won that roaring contest?”

Based on the element of unpredictability I programmed into this game, I cannot easily determine whether it's my laughter or my question that angers the griffon more. All I know is she turns to me and, after growling for a few seconds, points at my character and says, “You keep your mouth shut about that unless you want me to tear your face off.”

During this time, Rainbow Dash, who'd been hovering where I could see her all this time, has moved to a position next to me.

My character tilts toward her as I say under my breath, “I'll take that as a yes.” It's then that I remember that nothing's been done with the griffon dung, wrapped in a paper towel like a strange present, still in my character's hand.

But, before I can do anything with it, Rainbow Dash notices the strange object in my character's hand, as she asks, pointing to it, “What's that?”

As my character holds it up, I ask, “Oh, this?” Then, seeing the hovering pegasa nod, I answer, pointing to Gilda, “She left me a trophy for winning the roaring contest.”

Before I can say more, or have my character put the wrapped-up feces away, Rainbow Dash grabs it out of his hand and unwraps it just enough to get a good look at its contents. She takes a few sniffs of the contents, looks away, sticks her tongue out, and makes a gagging sound. Then she flies to her griffon friend and says, “Gilda! You come with me and Mormon outside, right now!”

My third visit to Ponyville, and I seem to have no control of where my character is going. In a matter of a few seconds, Gilda, Rainbow Dash, and my character are just outside the bakery, with the azure pegasa glaring at both of us.

Rainbow Dash fully opens the paper towel, revealing the griffon's dung, shoves it between the griffon's eyes, and asks, “Just what happened between the two of you?”

Gilda, now wide-eyed, asks, “You think that came from me?”

Rainbow Dash points to me and answers, “Mormon says you left it for him as a trophy.”

The azure pegasa has just made it clear that she either doesn't appreciate my sense of humor, or she doesn't understand it.

Either way, I'm not altogether sure Gilda understands it either. She turns to me and says, “Well, if you like my s--- so much, here's some more for you.” With that, she grins evilly at my character, and I notice a change in her posture. I can make an educated guess that the female griffon is most likely squatting.

Before she can produce any more, though, Rainbow Dash rubs the griffon's first “trophy” into the feathers of her head, then says, “Whatever comes out of you next also goes into your head feathers.”

The griffon dung, by now, should've had time to cool off so it wouldn't be steaming. Still, I can't help wondering if the steam rising from Gilda's head is a mixture of her fury and that dung mixed into her feathers. She is glaring, after all, and her face is turning red. Through gritted teeth (strange, I think, to see such things in a bird's beak), she says to Rainbow Dash, “And, here I thought we were friends.” Then, turning to my character, she says, “As for you, human, you better stay out of my way from now on unless you got a death-wish.” Presently she turns to Rainbow Dash again and screams, “You know what? I don't want to be here with a bunch of losers! I ain't gonna waste my time here any more! I'm sick of you, and I'm sick of this stupid place! If you wanna stay here with these idiots, then you can just stay here and rot!” After that, she turns away from Rainbow Dash and flies off, although she can't seem to get very far without running into the roof of one house.

As my character watches the furious griffon fly away, I say, “She took it better than I thought she would.” Then my character turns to Rainbow Dash, and I can see the distraught look on her face. I ask, “Are you alright?”

The azure pegasa, looking like a puppet hanging by one string, says, “I was hoping she could get to know my other friends. I didn't think things'd turn out like this.”

I can't think of anything to say. So, I just watch through my character's eyes as Rainbow Dash hovers for a few moments as tears fall from her eyes, then as she rises into the sky and disappears into a small white cloud, which promptly turns a dark gray.

Just then, I hear Pinkie Pie ask, “Where's Dashy?”

My character looks to show me the head of a pink pony peering at him out of the doorway. He points to the cloud hiding the distraught pegasa, and I say, “She just needs time to herself right now. I'm sure she'll be fine.”

The pink pony then asks, “And, what about Gildy?”

My character points in the direction the griffon flew off. I pause for a moment, then say, “She flew off in that direction.”

Funny, isn't it? I know these are fictional characters, and, in this case, video game characters; so it's not as though they had a real life in the first place. Yet, knowing what Pinkie Pie is going to do to the female griffon, I still feel like I'm the one murdering her.

In the mean time, Pinkie Pie exits through the door, closing it behind her, then turns and waves to me as she says, “Thank you,” before bouncing off in the direction my character is pointing.

My character goes back inside where I enjoy the party, getting an introduction to Applejack and Rarity. I don't see Twilight Sparkle there, and I'm asked questions about where Rainbow Dash is and where Pinkie Pie ran off to. I give the question about Rainbow Dash the same answer that Pinkie Pie got, although without pointing out her location. As for the question about Pinkie Pie, I answer that I guess she's making some kind of delivery.

I don't know how long I spend at the party. All I know is when my character leaves I find Rainbow Dash waiting for me at the front door of the bakery. I ask, “Are you alright?”

The azure pegasa doesn't answer vocally, just gestures in a direction.

I can only guess she wants me to join her in walking in that direction. With really nothing else to do, and seeing her point and start walking in that direction, my character follows her.

The two of us walk silently and slowly until we are past the outskirts of town; then Rainbow Dash stops, turns and looks at my character. She seems to struggle to find the words for a few seconds, then finally asks, “Why did I have to do that to Gilda?”

I say, “I should've thrown that mess away as soon as I got it cleaned up. Honestly, I didn't intend it to be used as a weapon, certainly not something that'd drive a wedge between you and your griffon friend.”

Rainbow Dash turns away and says, “What's done is done. I'm just afraid she'll hold it against me forever.”

My character sits down near the still distraught pegasa as I say, “Whatever she holds against you she'll likely hold against me as well.”

Now Rainbow Dash turns to my character again and eyes him carefully, then jumps at him.

My character catches her in his hands under her flared-out wings, slowing her down so she doesn't hurt him. Then, he holds her close to him, supporting her underneath with one arm, then, as she folds her wings, puts his other arm around them, keeping them folded.

Inadvertently, or maybe not, it seems the pegasa has draped her forelimbs around my character's shoulders in what any human would interpret as a hug. But, it seems she has no strength to push away from that position; and, instead, just collapses.

My character looks at the pegasa's back, and it's clear she's vibrating. So, my character uses his free hand to start stroking the pegasa's back between her wings. This is one of those times when the best thing to say is nothing.

After a few minutes, Rainbow Dash finally pushes away. After my character lets her go, she looks at me and says, “Thanks for that. Now, I'd better get going.”

Again I say nothing as I watch the azure pegasa with multicolored mane turn and fly off. I know what's going to happen to Gilda, and by the time Rainbow Dash finds out it'll be too late. And, when I see Pinkie Pie next, she'll have a platter of cupcakes with a “special ingredient.” And, I intend that my character be there to sample one of those cupcakes. But, for now, it's time to call it quits. So, that's what I do, after saving the game.

Alright, i didn't get to my character's house this time. But, I plan to get there soon, hopefully when I resume the game next time.

Author's Notes:

Well, so far it's clear the game designer has proven to the three stallions and Pinkie Pie that he doesn't intend to be their enemy. Even the mane six pegasae should be aware of that by now. Not only that, but we know the game designer's name, or at least his user name: Mormon. And, we know the names of each of the three stallions: The earth pony is called Berry Ground, the pegasus is called Emerald Hill, and the unicorn is called Stunts.

In the next chapter, called The Basement Revisited, as the title suggests, the game designer's character pays another visit to the basement of the factory, to have a talk with Pinkie Pie about the cupcakes he sampled. It's what's said and done at this point in the basement that'll be the real deciding factor in what'll happen in the subsequent chapters.

But first, he will pay his first visit to his house, opposite the Everfree forest from Ponyville. But, he won't be going there alone.

So, I hope you continue to enjoy the reading.