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Purple Haze

by TheGentlemanCreeper

Chapter 1: Prologue

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You were halfway to Manehattan, somewhere on the outskirts of Ponyville…

When the drugs began to take hold.

You start to slow down to a mild trot as your mind flickers in and out for a few moments. “I don’t feel so good,” you say as you motion to pull over “maybe you should pull the cart for a while.”

In all of a sudden, the sky grows dark and is filled with a terrible roar that sends a chill down your spine. Looking up, all you can see is what look like giant parasprites, swooping and screeching all around.

Somewhere in the distance, you can hear someone screaming: “DEAR CELESTIA, WHAT ARE THESE GODDAMN ANIMALS?!?”

You pick up the speed and swerve violently to avoid one of the parasprites coming in for a divebomb and just barely manage to avoid it. The sharp turn is enough to rouse your friend Tokey out of his sleep. He sighs haggardly as he sits up on his haunches.

“Whad’ya say?”

“Huh? Uh, nothing. Your turn to pull the cart.”

Stopping the cart, you unbuckle yourself quickly while swatting at the dark shapes just overhead. Jumping into the back of the cart, you throw the blanket over yourself, hoping they’ll go away if they don’t have a target.

Or at least go for Tokey… you think cynically.

The screeching starts to die down as Tokey gallops down the road, shaking the cart as he did so. The sound of glass knocking together causes you jump.

“TOKEY YOU MANIAC, SLOW DOWN! YOU’LL DESTROY THE STASH!”

Tokey looks over his shoulder at you and nods quickly before slowing down to a fast trot. You can’t help but shake your head at Tokey’s poor judgment and decide to take stock to make sure nothing was broken or contaminated.

Three bags of clover… Two sheets of Tokey’s blotter acid… A quart of vodka… Bottle of hard-cider… Ten pellets of mescaline…Wait. No, nine pellets.

“Tokey, how the hell did you talk me into doing that shit, anyway?”

He laughs aloud at your question. “Dude! You thought it was a jelly-bean, remember?”

“Oh,” you say plainly “well, anyone could make that mistake when they’re hungry.”

“Dude, you’ve been hungry for like the past hour and a half.”

“Fine! I stand corrected!” you yell “anyone can make that mistake when they’ve got the munchies!”

Tokey snickers aloud “Oh come on, Smokey. All you ever do is that clover of yours. It wouldn’t kill you to have a good time and try a little sunshine acid.”

“Tokey, your idea of a good time is a chemical coma. At least my clover doesn’t leave you feeling like you just came out of surgery,” you say as you root around for your rolling paper.

“You never want to have any fun,” he grumbles under his breath.

“I have fun, just not under your definition of it,” you say as you finish rolling your joint “I’m going to have fun at the Harvest Moon Music Festival the way I do every year: curled up in my chair with a good buzz, listening to great music.”

Tokey doesn’t say anything, leaving you to your own devices. You hold the joint in-between your lips as you pull out your Quick-Spark lighter and give it a good squeeze to get the flame going. Your paranoia starts to fade as the clover hits your system.

“Hey, did you just see that?” he asks excitedly.

“See what?” you cough out.

“We just passed this purple Unicorn. I’m gonna see if she wants a ride.”

Tokey stops the cart suddenly, making your eyes bug out of your head. “We can’t stop here!” you yell through clenched teeth “this is parasprite country!”

He doesn’t seem to hear you as he circles around and goes back the way you came, towards the alleged purple unicorn.

Sure enough, Tokey was right and walking up the road was a purple unicorn. She looked at you and Tokey quizzically as you slowly walk up to her. Remembering your manners, you extinguish the joint and tuck it in behind your ear, right under the arm of your glasses.

“Hey,” you say as the cart comes to a stop “heading our way?”

The purple mare stumbles across her words, as if she wasn’t expecting to see anyone out on this road. “Umm… Uh… What?”

“Where ya goin’?” Tokey asks plainly.

“Oh!” the mare exclaims “The uh... The Harvest Moon Festival.”

“Well, no shit!” you say with a chuckle “That’s where we’re going! Why don’t ya save yourself the walk and hop in?”

The unicorn puts on a strained smile and shakes her head. “Oh no, no. I couldn’t possibly impose on you two, I’ll just-”

“Walk the remaining ten miles to Manehattan?” you finish for her.

The purple mare blinks a few times, apparently just now realizing the trek she had ahead of her. “Well… My hooves are kinda sore… Sure, I don’t see any harm in it.”

You offer her a helping hoof as she makes her way to the back of the cart and hops in. “So, what’s your name?” you ask as she settles herself down.

“Twilight. Twilight Sparkle,” she says with an outstretched hoof.

“Pleasure to meet ya Twilight,” you say as you shake her hoof “You can call me Smokey, if you want. And the acid causality pulling the cart is Tokey.”

Twilight looks at both of you quizzically. “Smokey and… Tokey? Are you two brothers?”

“Nah, we ain’t. We just like to hang out and stuff,” Tokey says as he takes a hard right.

“Yeah, Smokey and Tokey are just sort of nicknames. Our buddies just sort of started calling us that and it stuck,” you say as you reach for your joint again “so, what brings you to the festival?”

“I’ve… I’ve been a little stressed lately and one of the books I was reading said that going to a large social gathering is supposed to be quite enjoyable and help lift spirits. With everything that’s been going on, I could really use it.”

Holding your joint in-between your lips again, you light it again and take a quick puff. “Why aren’t you going with any of your friends? Or don’t you have any?”

“I’ve got friends; they’re just all busy with…” Twilight sniffs the air as your joint begins to burn and furrows her brow as she gets a nose full of it “What’s that smell?”

“Clover,” you say plainly “want some?”

Twilight’s eyes widen at the word. “Clover? Isn’t that stuff illegal?” she asks nervously.

You wave it off. “Only in New Colt City, Canterlot, and awaiting approval in Manehattan, but it’s going to be turned down.”

“But… But what about all articles I’ve read? They say clover causes everything from lowered IQ, attention problems, sterility-”

“Whoa, just hold on there a minute,” you say as you hold up a hoof “you’ve been reading way too much Canterlot Examiner. Let me give you the real deal on clover.”

She looks at you, shocked. “How did you know I-”

“You see, Hearst is the one who writes the Canterlot Examiner and he’s just got a real vendetta against anyone who smokes clover. I have no idea why, but he just hates us,” you say before taking a long drag on your joint. “So, he comes up with all sorts of outrageous claims, like how ponies are getting stupider on clover and it’s even killing them. Now Twilight, how long do you think I’ve been smoking? Take a wild guess.”

“Umm… A year? Maybe two?” she asks, unsure of herself.

Tokey laughs aloud. “Nah girl, he’s been smoking for close to a decade now! When did you start, dude? Elementary school?”

You shake your head. “My dad started in elementary school. I started in Middle school.”

“And you were what? A C student?” she asks bluntly.

“For your information, Miss Sparkle, I graduated with honors,”

You smirk as she stares at you with wide eyes. She opens her mouth to say something, but closes it and looks away bashfully. “I’m sorry, that was pretty rude. I didn’t-”

“Don’t worry about it,” you say as you take the joint out of your mouth. “Looks can be deceiving. Now, I was serious about that offer; do you want a hit or can I finish it?”

“I don’t know…” Twilight says as she eyes the joint cautiously “What happens when the plant enters your system?”

You don’t even skip a beat. You knew all there was to know about clover. “It’s not the plant itself; it’s the active ingredient, tetrahydroclovinol that causes the ‘high’. It can cause all sorts of things to happen to ponies and it’s usually unique to them alone. Personally, I get pretty calm and metaphysical.”

Twilight blinks a few times, “It sounds like you know what you’re talking about... and you definitely don’t sound like the stereotypical stoner that the Canterlot Examiner described…” she rationalizes as she slowly takes the joint. “And you’re sure there are no side-effects?”

You give her the joint and nod “Totally. Well, except for craving for an entire bag of kettle chips.”

Twilight scrutinizes every inch of the joint before looking back up at you. “So… I just put my lips on it and inhale?”

“That’s about it,” Tokey chimes in “Just hold it for like five seconds.”

“Just be careful,” you say as she tokes on it sharply “You don’t wanna-”

Too late. Twilight’s eyes widen and she’s soon thrown into a coughing fit. Grabbing the bottle of hard cider, you pull the cork off and hand it to her.

“Take a little swig, you’ll be fine,” Tokey says as he tries to watch what was going on and the road at the same time.

Twilight brings her lips to the bottle and drinks quickly and almost chokes again. “T-Thanks,” she manages to sputter out “I-” she stops and blinks a few times “I feel a little light-headed…”

“Why don’t you lie down for while?” you say as you re-cork the bottle.

“Yeah… Yeah I’ll do that,” she says as she sprawls out on her back. She coughs a few more times before looking over to you. “Does clover always leave your mouth so dry?”

You can’t help but laugh aloud. “It does that, sometimes. Want some vodka? Or more hard-cider?”

Twilight nods. “Yeah... Cider would be nice.”

You go to grab the hard cider, when Tokey cranes his head around and looks to you. “Hey bro, can you pour me some of that rot-gut? I’m feeling a little tired.”

“Sure thing,” you say as you unscrew the top to the bottle. Moving to the front of the cart, you expertly tip the bottle and pout a good amount into Tokey’s mouth. With an audible gulp, he cringes before shaking his head from side to side.

“WOO! GOOD TO GO!” he says with renewed vigor.

You toss Twilight the bottle of hard cider, which she just barely catches. “Where did you get this?” she asks as she eyes the bottle.

“Sweet Apple Acres.”

“I knew it tasted familiar,” she says rather happily. “My friend Applejack runs the whole place with her family. I haven’t had any in quite a while, actually.”

“Well don’t get hammered, just yet!” Tokey warns “We’re like, halfway there, so save it for the party!”

“Will there be a lot of drinking there?” Twilight asks as she tries to get the cork back on the bottle.

“Usually. I’m not much of a drinker myself, but I imbibe every now and again.”

“Hey Twi’, when we get to the party, up for a body shot?” Tokey asks sarcastically.

Twilight cocks her head to the side. “What’s a body shot?”

You can’t help but laugh aloud. “Twilight, he’s asking if he can drink tequila out of your belly-button.”

She begins blushing heavily. “I... Uh.... I don’t know. Is that something that happens at the festival normally?”

“Only when the music dies down and the real party starts,” you say as you tuck away the drinks for later.

Tokey shoots Twilight a playful look. “What’s wrong Twi’? Do you wanna do a body-shot off of me, instead?”

Her face goes even redder and you can’t help but nudge her playfully. “He’s messing with you, so relax. You gotta learn to take a joke.”

You hoped she wasn’t too sore about the teasing, but you begin to notice her eyes beginning to glass over as she stares up at the orange sky. The stars were just starting to shine as the sun set.

“The north star looks so bright…” she says as she holds a hoof out above her head. You venture a guess and assume that something was about to take hold. Twilight slumps down and rolls over onto her back. You lie down beside her and look up at the sky.

“Does look kinda bright, doesn’t it?”

Twilight doesn’t say anything for a while, so you look over to her and find that she was beginning to nod off. “I’ll wake ya up when we get there, okay?”

“Okay…” she mumbles as she finally drifts off to sleep.

Looking back up, you can’t help but smile. “Twilight’s first star… Tokey?”

“Yeah bro?”

“Wake me up when you get tired, okay?”

“Sure thing.”

Next Chapter: Chapter 1 Estimated time remaining: 2 Hours, 59 Minutes
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