Chapter Two: Universe Hop Times Two

"So you're saying that there are mutants and raiders and all sorts of nasty stuff in this universe? And that this all somehow exists as a game series in your universe?" Twilight asked.

"Right," I replied, "it's just like how your universe is manifest in mine as a TV show."

"I guess so, but why did Discord send this human somewhere so dangerous?" Spike asked. Most of the whole 'preparing' aspect of our expedition so far had been Q&A. Tiresome, but useful Q&A; the two ponies- and Spike- had to be fully aware of what we could expect in the Fallout universe, something I knew about.

"I have no idea, maybe he was trying to put them where I could find them. It was part of his 'game', it seems."

"That guy needs a better definition of 'game'. It isn't fun to be stuck in a wasteland full of human-eating monsters, right?" Rainbow was still excited to go, despite the distasteful environment we were destined to enter the next day.

"What are the Fallout games like?" Spike asked. He would be one to enjoy video games, and had learned some about them from my letters to Twilight.

"Well, as terrible as it sounds, they're really quite enjoyable. You have no responsibilities in the games, so you can do what you want in what is known as an 'open-world', meaning you can go through a large area, doing all sorts of things. The main focus of the game is combat, though, and many, many hostile creatures and people attack you, and killing them for reward and survival is one of the main points," I explained, "but since this is a real situation we're heading into, this has little chance of being as simple or fun as the games." As I said this, it solidified the notion in me that these games were quite terrible. The group had this notion from the start, and I could see it in their faces that they all thought it was psychotic to enjoy such things, but they couldn't understand. Well, I couldn't really understand either. It just seems to be the way we are.

"I don't think there'll be very many monsters or raiders, though. Realistically, the way the games portray them as numerous and frequent don't make a whole lot of sense. Hopefully, we won't have to fight anything."

The group just listened intently on what I had to say. Like the time Twilight was sent to Earth with me, I knew everything and they knew nothing. My actual skills and experience on the matter, however, were likely going to be useless, for the most part. Knowing that I could just join the Brotherhood of Steel by doing one or two favors for them wasn't realistic, for example.

"I think that's enough brainstorming for today, we should all get some sleep, we're going to need it." Twilight's command ended the question session, Rainbow went home, and I assumed a position on a heap of pillows and blankets in the middle of the floor. It was going to be an interesting adventure, to be sure.

*****

I awoke to a loud pounding on the door. It wasn't quite morning yet, was it? I checked my watch. 6:12 AM. Really, really early for me, especially for a Saturday. It must have been Rainbow Dash, she seemed like the early-riser type. My assumptions were confirmed almost immediately.

"Hey! Twilight! Get up! Hellooo!" Rainbow must have been waking the whole neighborhood. I remained motionless until Twilight came down the stairs, groggy and grumbling, Rainbow still yelling through the door.

"Zach, get up," she said.

I got to my feet, having no excuse to be in bed anymore. Twilight opened the door to reveal a surprisingly excited Rainbow Dash, a small pack over her back, obviously specially designed to not be a hinderance while flying. She came in.

"Have you any idea how early it is?" Twilight grumbled.

"Early? It's six o'clock, I always get up at six," Rainbow reasoned.

"Well, that must be why you take so many naps," I said, snarkily. Rainbow's yelling had woken me up pretty quickly, and I was already sharp. Well, sharp as I could be at such an hour.

"I do not! I take naps to... uh... relax, yeah, that's it. Let's get some breakfast and go."

I chuckled a bit at her evasion. Twilight headed into the kitchen of the library-house hybrid, and came back a few moments later with several apples on a plate. I took a granola bar from my bag, as well as one of the offered apples. After eating our impromptu meal, Twilight woke Spike, who was even less cheery about getting up than any one of us. After all had settled, all of us had eaten, and everyone was awake, we began our final preparations.

"Where do you think we'll end up, in the other universe?" Twilight asked me.

"I couldn't have less of a clue. We'll just have to find out ourselves."

"Are you sure I should come with you guys? This sounds dangerous." Spike was beginning to see Twilight's reasoning.

"We'll protect you, Spike. If anyone dies or gets hurt, it's my fault. So I promise you all that we'll get the human back, and we'll all come back in one piece." This promise was one I thought I could not fulfill, but only for a moment. We had the Elements of Loyalty and Magic on our side, and mine, Order, for what that's worth. What's to worry about?

"Yeah, that's right, don't worry!" Rainbow would probably take a similar view to the situation, being the most loyal being in all of Equestria, she'd take it pretty hard if anything happened to any one of us, even me, who she hardly knew as a person. How well did they know me? Twilight knew more about me more than any other pony, and even she didn't really know me. I wasn't a highly social person and it was easy to figure out that on the outside, what with my unimposing physique, mild manners, and normally quiet nature, I was a boring person. That's my exterior, though, and if one gets to my interior, I'm pretty different. I'm still usually quite boring, serious and quiet, but I'm more open about my opinions and the like, and more relaxed. I wasn't at near that point of friendship with any one of them except for Twilight.

Twilight had said once that she considered me a friend, but who wouldn't consider the guy that was trying to save your universe a friend? Our relationship was an odd one. I knew almost everything there was to know about Twilight Sparkle. She's really good at magic, Celestia's her mentor, she has five really good friends, she's somewhat of a control freak, she's really smart, and a host of other things. What did she know about me? My letters to her had revealed almost nothing about myself, while hers were more personalized, telling me tidbits of what had happened in her day-to-day interactions with the other denizens of Equestria, sometimes saying that I should come visit, and she had thanked me several times for saving the universe, and said that all of Equestria was indebted to me. She was trying to be my friend, but I wasn't really reciprocating her efforts. It was still a silly concept to think of.

Almost any brony on Earth would jump at the chance to be one of the ponies' friends, but actually doing so was thought by all to be something pretty much only known to self-insertion fan-fiction, something that this whole thing was looking very much like. With the short visit of three background characters from the show on Earth, and for a shorter time, Twilight as well, the fandom became just that much weirder and larger. More and more 'true stories' of how humans entered Equestria and lived to tell the tale showed up. These were peculiar to me- universe travelling was serious buisness- not an author device like it once was. However, they'd have their fun with it. The fandom's evolution had begun to take on a more cult-like aspect, some even claiming that it was destined for humanity to go to Equestria, as though it were some new 'Holy Land', or salvation, a solution to the energy crisis, or whatever. Again, even weirder. My thought wanderings were interrupted.

"Right, Zach?" Twilight asked.

"What was that? I didn't catch it."

"We should bring some food with us."

"Yes, yes, we should."

"Will there be any gems there?" Spike asked.

"Nope, gems are really, really rare in my world, and this one too. You can eat rocks and other stuff, too, right?"

"Yeah, I guess so," Spike said, slightly disappointed.

Twilight was packing her saddlebags, and had prepared a checklist of required items with uncanny speed, and was magically checking off items as she put them in.

"Apples, check. Quill, ink and paper, check. More apples, check..."

This went on for a while, before she finally said,

"Looks like that's everything. Everyone ready?"

"As ready as I'll ever be," I replied, and began to focus my portal spell.

"Sure," Spike answered, nervously.

"Always!" Rainbow acknowledged.

The portal opened before us, and we entered.

The wasteland had touches of green in it, meaning this area hadn't been hit so badly by the bombs. This was good, there wouldn't be so much radiation. I looked around, and saw not a single living thing throughout the entire landscape. It was eerily quiet, except for a soft whistle of the wind. We were standing on a road, and a billboard was clearly visible. One sign on it simply read in faded letters, 'Drink Nuka-Cola', and, more interestingly, the second one read 'Vault 46, next exit. Reserve your spot today!'. A Vault! How fortunate for us.

"Wow," Spike said, in awe of the drastically different environment, "it's so gray here."

"It really is. Zach, is it always this gray?" Rainbow asked.

"Actually, this place is comparatively good in terms of healthy color. See, there are a few green plants around, meaning that the nuclear bombs didn't hit this area too hard," I replied.

"So, where do we go now?" Twilight asked. It was always the questions, questions, and more questions with her.

"Well, I think our best bet is to go this way. You know those 'Vaults' I mentioned? One of them is supposedly nearby."

"But... didn't you say that some of the Vaults failed?" Spike recalled my explanation.

"I did, but it's a place to start, if anything."

The group began to move along the road. None of us knew what could be in that Vault. Was it raided, picked clean, its inhabitants slaughtered? Or was it a civilized Vault, with help to give, or a Vault that allowed no entry? We'd have to wait to find out.