Twilight Sparkle sat alone in the treebrary, eating a book. “What an interesting
story” she realized as she finished the book. She looked around in loneliness as she
realized that Spike had left earlier to go to Princess Celestia for a while. “I love books but
I’m so alone.”

Then the door knocked and it was Rainbow Dash, but Twilight didn’t
know. “Who’s there” she opened the door. It was Rarity.

“Twilight I made you dresses!” Rarity started putting a dress on Twilight who
was shocked in horror.

“Rarity what are you doing here so suddenly?” Her exclamations. “I was reading
books while Spike was lonely.”

“But tomorrow is the festival” said Rarity generically. “You need to get a dress.”
And Rarity put another dress in Twilight before she could object it.

“But no!” Twilight cut through “there is no festival!”

“My life is a lie!” Rarity cried off in a huff, leaving dresses everywhere.

“That was weird.” Twilights. “Everypony’s been acting weird lately. Yesterday
Rainbow Dash flew into a red and came out of Ohio.” Her confusion ran further.

Twilight couldn’t think about it without a lack of knowledge so she went to
Octavia. “Octavia, why is everypony acting weird?”

But Octavia was too busy drinking large amounts of alcohol and meth which was
quite unlike her. She laughed at Twilight and slammed doors in her face.

“Curses” Twiligt said and confused her way to Fluttershy who was hiding inside
of Angel.

“Fluttershy is afraid so she made me swallow he.” Angel talked.

“You can talk!?”

“I always talk but no one listens” a sad bunny.

“I will listen tell me why Fluttershy is scared.”

“She’s always scared also there was a monster.”

“What monster?”

“It was like a dragon and an octopus and other things.”

“Oh no!” Twilight went home in hurry. She grabbed books and knew who what
it was. It was a legend though, never to be real. She worried her way to Applejack to give
warnings.

“We’re all in danger!” Twilight said.

“Don’t worry I have shotguns” Applejack was confident.

“But it’s... I can’t say what it is or I would die.”

“Don’t speak then, we will fight.”

“Where did your southern go?”

“It was fake. Now I will live my destiny.” And she took shotguns to find the
monster. Twilight cried because she knew in her soul that she would never see dear
Applejack again.

“Your sister’s dead” Twilight told Big Mac. “Tread it lightly.”

“Eyup.” Big Mac couldn’t find the words to fully express his sorrow at the loss of
his dear sister Applejack. So he expressed himself by bucking Twilight multiple times.

“I’m okay!” Twilight in a hospital “Where is Big Mac?”

“He went to die with his sister” Said Princess Luna. “Twilight, Equestria is
doomed. We cannot stop-“

“NO! Don’t say its name! You’ll die!?”

“Candlejack?”

“... What? No, not Candlejack.” Because Candlejack wasn’t real.

“Stop fowl thing!” Applejack and Big Mac both warned the thing that was really
evil. They fired the bullets at its tentacles but no avail.

“FJKgf dnKJbf nbcx” The creature destroyed Big Mac and Applejack effortlessly
and proceeded to Ponyville.

“There’s no hope!” Said Berry Punch solemnly. “Cthulhu will kill us all!” And
she apparated straight to hell for saying Cthulhu.

“We’ll all die!” Said Lyra and Bon-Bon right before they died.

“This is not over!” Appeared Luna, firing magic at Cthulhu who screamed in
Cthulhian. “It’s working!”

Then Luna eroded. “NO!” Twilight watched in horror as Cthulhu came straight
towards her. They fired rocket missiles but they didn’t hurt Cthulhu obviously.

“TWIILIGHT!” Came Rainbow Dash ridden by Pinkie Pie who had a sword.
Dash flew around Cthlhu and Pinkie swang swords. They started cutting off his tentacles
which made him shrink and before long he was the size and shape of a man with wings
and ugly. “FINISH HIM!” Dash sonic rainboomed into Cthulhu and Pinkie sword
pierced him. He died and his cult was sad and angry but Celestia killed them.

“We lost many great ponies today.” Celestia says. “The brave Apple family was
slaughtered after two of them attempted to stop Cthulhu, many innocent lives died, and
even my own sister.

“But they can live!” Twilight planned and used some magic. The spell of life
formed around her horn and rose to the air, raining a purple mist down all around
Ponyville. It was a thing of pure beauty that ponies live their whole lives without seeing.
But it didn’t work.

Another day and it was the funeral for Apples and Luna. Sadly Celestia gave
eulogies and made ponies sadder.

But life wasn’t over yet.

Rainbow Dash flew solemnly into clouds crying her eyes because of Applejack.
She never told anypony except Pinkie Pie that she loved her. “I won’t tell anyone
FOREVER” pinkie said when she learned and was happy to be trusted.

Rarity felt bad for Rainbow because Rarity loved Rainbow Dash because of how
lively and filthy she was it was attractive to her. She never told anyone but also Pinkie
Pie. Pinkie knew everypony’s secrets.

Twilight sobbed in the Treebrary over Luna because she loved her since the
Princess hooked them up at a bar cleverly. I know this, because Pinkie knows this.

There was more to it all though. Fluttershy was involved as well, for she’s always
secretly admired her. Despite Angel’s constant pressure, she never made any advances.
She was always too shy. She was too shy to even tell Pinkie Pie.

Yet Pinkie still managed to find out. Angel probably told her.

Pinkie, on the other hand, had no secrets of her own. Her selflessness kept
her away from a love life of her own. She was a pony on a mission, though no one
understood quite what that mission was.

Rainbow Dash sat gloomily on a hill, rain pouring down over her. She had
stick a small wooden cross into a pile of rocks, to signify Applejack’s grave. There was
no body there however, since there was nothing left of her.

“Applejack...” Rainbow sobbed, her head down. “I swear, I shall avenge you.”

“But there’s no time.” A voice’s mystery said. “She’s gone and you need to move

on.”

“I know Rarity” Rainbow Dash knew it. “But it’s hard and painful. I can’t live
without her and Cthulhu is already dead. I killed him with my own hooves and sword.”

“But Rainbow Dash I made you a dress.” And Rarity put her on the dress and
Rainbow Dash smiled because it was really cool and awesome like her.

“Thank you Rarity.” Rainbow dressed.

There was a few moments of calm and happy but it couldn’t last long.

“Twilight I’m sorry but Luna died nobally.” Spikes voices.

“NO! It’s not fair, I loved her!”

“You should be happy.” Probably Twilight.

“Why would I be happy!” Twilight magicked Spike out the window assertively
and he got mad and ran away. Twilight picked up a banjo and played her sorrow. No one
knew that Twilight was so sad except for Spike and Luna but was dead.

Spike went to Pinkie Pie and told her about Twilight but Pinkie swore not to tell
anypony and told Spike the truth secret of how to make Twilight better. It was a cupcake.
He took it to Twilight and she ate it and it gave her wishes. She wished for Luna to be
back again and Luna appeared out of sci-fi. “YAY” Loved Twilight as Luna.

Spike felt good but Pinkie Pie was talking to Rainbow Dash and Rarity now.
They were in love but Rainbow was still sadder because of Applejack and she was
lovers. So Rarity was consoling. For a while there was okay but then a ninja came.

The Ninja jumped out of Rarity’s home and began to stab and slash. Before long
she was dead. When her body was found everyone was upset but mostly Rainbow
Dash. “Everypony I love dies!” Dash yelled flying angrily. Applejack tried to stop her
but she couldn’t.

Rainbow flew to an isolated cliff where she stared down over history sobbing. “I
can’t go on.” She was sad. “I will die now like everyone else.” And she closed her wings

and jumped from the cliff to her iminit death.

“HOLD IT!” A voice yelled like Phoenix Wright as the TARDIS came with
Doctor Whooves and saved Rainbow. “I’m the Doctor” He was. “I’ll show you why to
live.” And he took her through time and her life and showed her how good it was but it
only made her sadder. Then she went to audition for the Wonderbolts.

She didn’t make it because she was too reckless said the Wonderbolts so her life
meant nothing and the Doctor gave up. Rainbow flight back to the cliff for more suicide
but then saw ghosts. The ghosts were Applejack and she said about Twilight’s magic
muffin. “I want it!” Rainbows.

Twilight polished her muffin of wishing and smiled at Luna who read a book the
Kama Sutra because she was in love and was getting used to the new pony methods of
intercourse if she ever wanted to do it.

“Let’s do number 69” Twilights life.

“Okay” Luna was okay with it but then there was Rainbow Dash who rainboomed
into the library breaking a few things. Luna was reading still obliviously but Twilight
was angered.

“You broke a few of my things!”

“I need to borrow your muffin!” But Twilight was too angry so she teleportaled
the muffin to Hell. “I will go get it!” And so Twilight teleports Rainbow to Hell also.

Rainbow fights through the hoards of Hell but there’s no muffin so she gets mad
at Twilight and flies out of Hell but is caught by Discord who is hungry.

“You are a rainbow pony” Says Discord, throwing Dash to to ground and
breaking her wings. Discord slithered and wrapped around Rainbow Dash making her
completely immobile. He then proceeded to stick something into every hole on her body.
At that moment Twilight quickly teleports Rainbow back to the library.

“I was angry so I lied, the muffin is right here” Twilight had the muffin. Rainbow
took it to happiness but was intercepted by another ninja who slashed and stabbed the
muffin and took it. “NO!” Rainbow everywhered.

Twilight Sparkle flew after the ninja but couldn’t fly so she failed. Rainbow was
better though and flew but Twilight fell and broke nine. Rainbow flew into a large rock
but broke it with power and flew after the ninja who couldn’t fly and Rainbow caught
it. “FUCKING ASSHOLE!” Rinbow fucked him.

A broken life fell from a dripping soul as poetry flew down the sky along ways.
Luna who had used her die as a fake to escape to peace watched poetries flying and

singing and plants were happy like Asians.

Her soul danced with her as rainbow hurricanes floated gently into green
hemispheres. She was in a land of pure beauty then suddenly BOOM Rainbow
Dash “BOOM!” She said as punching the ninja into Luna place.

“The fuck?” Luna the fucked. As she flew away to continue to be dead but it was
too late. Celestia appeared and ate the ninja then pissed off at Luna. Rainbow escaped
stealthily almost but Celestia saw her and blamed her and so Luna banished her to the
sun.

“OUCH!” Rainbow said since it was hot there but she knew the adversity would
make her stronger like Drew Brees or that other famous football player Donald Trump.
Then I was on fire.

I put down my computer and went to Equestria to find more things to write about
and I saw Luna return from being dead and everypony was happy and horny so Ponyville
orgied all the time and it was beautifully. But things were shittier in cloudsdale because
Spitfire misplaced her Soarin. “Where did I put that thing?” Spitfire bitched then found
him so they performed but it wasn’t there best performance also Soarin crashed into a
meteor from the sun that was actually Rainbow and he died and Rainbow Dash became a
shrubbery.

Fire came out of Spitfire’s flamethrower as she burned every shrubbery in
Cloudsdale searching for money. Burning and sun was the same that day.

Chapter 2 Applejack doesn’t die because she’s already dead

As the sun came up and the rain went down Applejack didn’t die so it was a good
day for Rainbow who was on fire but content with her life anyway because Spitfire was
laying in the burning bush to make sure she died and Rainbow Dah wanted to back to a
pony and sexing but Spitfire was too Soarin.

Meanwhile at the same place Spitfire got up and ate the flaming bush causing her
to become fire and so she burns everyone she loves and her life is pretty bad from now
on. Then Scootaloo was happy and in school doing presentations on how to give
somepony wingal sex it wasn’t easy. She demonstrated on Cheerilee who approved and
then they all flew to Asia where Asian people were giving each other wingal like
scootaloo who was Asian.