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Amazing Comics: Spider-Man

by DeWitt-Enterprises


Chapters


The Web Begins to Weave Pt I

"Dear Peter,

I know that I haven't written to you in an awfully long time and I would like to apologize for that. I'm also going to apologize for the fact that this letter isn't going to be a very long one. I'd just like to tell you that I'm going to be in town for a few days and I'm going to be visiting the Oscorp research tower in Manhattan and I was wondering if you'd like to accompany me on my trip?

Regards,

              Twilight Sparkle.

Peter set the letter down on his desk and ran a hand through his mop of brown hair. He sucked in a breath through his teeth before whistling loudly.

"Is that an offer for a date?" he asked himself, kicking his feet up on his desk as he rocked back and forth on his chair "Nah... Twilight's definitely not into me like that, I don't think girls like me to begin with" There came a loud knock at the door that caused Peter to jump in surprise, nearly costing him his balance as the door swung open, revealing his Uncle Ben.

"Hey kiddo, your Aunt's making Sunday dinner for us tomorrow and it's your choice this time-" the ageing man said with a smirk "So what'll it be, pork or beef?" Peter dropped his feet back onto the floor and straightened his shirt.

"Uh, I think I'll go with beef this time" Peter shrugged.

"Good choice, we haven't had beef for a while" Ben nodded "Right-" Ben patted his hand on the door and looked around the room, filled with strewn clothes, posters and books that hadn't been organized yet.

"You thinking of givin' this place a bit of cleaning Pete?" Ben asked, drumming his hand on the door.

"Yeah-" Peter said, looking around the room and making his decision "I wasn't a moment ago... but you talked me into it"

"Good" Ben nodded. The two met eyes for a second and nodded before Ben left the room and closed the door quietly. Peter whistled quietly, drumming his hands on his legs while he sorted out which task needed to be done first.

"Right, I'll write back to Twilight after I clean this place up" Peter sighed, getting up out of his chair and stretching his legs. He scoured the room briefly for a spot to begin his clean-up session and upon finding one he took off at a good clean speed.

The skinny teenager packed clothes into the laundry basket, wiping a scuff of his Ramones T-Shirt as he carefully placed it in the basket, before moving on to clearing the clutter off his desk.

His hand stopped over his glasses, debating whether to trade his contacts for lenses instead, reaching the conclusion that his style looked better than his blocky specs.

The next thing to pick up and put away would be two of his jackets, a sleek black one that constantly needed brushing to remove fabric that kept getting caught on it, and the second being a green jacket, this also being his favourite.

He carefully hung both jackets up in his wardrobe before moving onto the disarrayed pile of comic books that lay on his desk. There were issues stacked high f the famous DC superheroes ranging from Batman to the Justice League, Nightwing to Wonder Woman.

Peter had to mentally stop his raging inner nerd from grabbing an issue he hadn't finished reading and just plonk himself down on the floor and start reading it there and then. So far in the comic, from what he had read, Batman had been summoned by Commissioner Gordon into the Gotham City police department to confront him on the death of a senator he had failed to rescue.

"C'mon Parker" Peter mumbled to himself, tearing his eyes away from the tempting piece of print and continued stacking up his favourite series' in an orderly fashion.

Peter's mind was able to quickly analyse each serial number on the stray comic books that he hadn't managed to collect their brethren for and pair them up in the closest matching order before putting them in a set of drawers that were labelled with his own improvised Dewey Decimal System.

Despite the small size of the room he inhabited it took a good thirty minutes to fully tidy as he knew how picky his Aunt was when it came to everything being folded, hung up, dusted and vacuumed. This all had to be checked off before she would deem it as 'clean' and it drove not only Peter but also his Uncle up the wall.

"Peter!" he heard his Aunt call, catching his attention as he clambered out from underneath his bed to retrieve his glasses case that had fallen off his bed during his cleaning adventures.

He stood up and dusted off his blue shirt, electing to ignore the dust underneath his bed as something that didn't need to be seen or mentioned. He ducked out of his door and headed down the stairs, leaning into the turn as he gripped the door frame causing him to swing into the kitchen.

"Holla" Peter said as he walked over the tiled floor and dragged a chair out from underneath the dinner table they had.

"Hold up a second there Coolio" Ben said with a chuckle "You're not supposed to sit down before the food's at the table, makes it harder for your Aunt to set the table with hands and arms in the way" Peter gave his an Uncle a bemused look as he noted that his Uncle was already sitting while reading the paper from earlier that day.

"You're already sitting down" Peter said with a cocked eyebrow.

"I know, I never said I wasn't allowed to sit down, just you" Ben chuckled as he went back to reading. Peter crossed his arms, tapping his foot as he waited for his Aunt to set down the delicious smelling food.

Peter sat down on the chair and tucked himself under the table. The plate of spaghetti had been prepared just like Peter wanted it and had a former chef's professional touch onto it.

The sauce was plain and tomatoey with delicious pasta beneath it that made Peter's stomach rumble. The family began to tuck into their food, several minutes passing before Peter's Aunt spoke up.

"I noticed you got a letter from your friend earlier today, what's she up to nowadays?" Aunt May asked in a soft tone.

"Well, from what I know she said that she recently finished her tutelage with Princess Celestia and is going to be going to public school now" Peter said after finishing a mouthful of spaghetti.

"Seems like a bit of a downgrade don't you think?" Ben asked "Going from a teacher like Princess Celestia to some balding forty year old history teacher teaching sex education to a class of immature fifteen year olds"

"I don't think I'd like it" Peter nodded "But then again... I'd think I'd much rather have a more mature lesson of sex ed with Celestia" The joke Peter made got two very different reactions from his relatives.

"Peter!" May snapped in a stern tone. Peter lowered his eyes for a brief second before his Uncle gave his thoughts on the piece of humour.

"Now, now May, Peter's fifteen now and he's bound to be thinking like that" Ben defended "Besides, the kid's got good taste it seems" Peter looked at his Uncle across the table and as soon as the older man raised his fist above the table Peter knew what he meant. The two bumped fists and nodded at each other, causing May to roll her eyes with disapproval.

"You're a bad influence on him Ben" May sighed.

"I try my best dear" Ben said before turning to Peter with a grin "Now, if you were ever to get a go with Celestia, you do know how to handle a woman don't you?"

"Alright, alright!" May exclaimed angrily "That's quite enough!" The two boys looked at May before they burst out laughing at her reaction.

"Just checking" Ben chuckled before returning to eating his food. There was a long moment of silence before May continued speaking.

"So, now that we've got our little discussion out of the way, can we get back onto the topic of Twilight?" May asked, looking back and forth between her husband and her nephew.

"Sure, anyway, she invited me to tag along on a trip to Oscorp sometime soon" Peter explained "I haven't been there for a while and I figured it would be fun to go and see how much has changed.

"Right" May nodded "This is going to be the first time you meet Twilight, right?"

"Yeah" Peter said.

"Just make sure you wear something nice" she said absent-mindedly.

"Don't... don't I usually?" Peter asked with a cocked eyebrow.

"I'm not saying that you don't... it's just that, I'm sure you want to make the right impression" May shrugged.

"So you're saying that I should rock up in a tuxedo and flowers in hand?" Peter asked.

"If you feel that would help boost your relationship with her" May said slyly. At this point Peter put down his fork and held up a hand in front of him.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa there Aunt May" Peter said with a surprised chuckle "I'm going on a trip to Oscorp to meet my friend for the first time, I'm not going to try and score or anything"

"Well I never said you were-" May spoke before being cut off by Peter.

"So then why did you suggest that I go all decked out?" Peter asked.

"You're the one that said that, not me" May defended.

"You thought that I was serious though!" Peter exclaimed.

"Alright Peter calm down, you can go in your skater scrubs if you want-" Ben said to Peter before turning to May "And Peter can try and get a girlfriend whenever he wants, May, so stop trying to rush him into a relationship" May looked at her food briefly before sighing with a small nod.

"Fine" she agreed.

"Besides, with the way Peter's going I think he's going to be fending them off with a stick by the time he gets to twenty" Ben said jokingly. Peter suddenly glanced up at the wall, hovering his gaze on it for a second, before looking back down at his plate.

"You OK Pete?" Ben asked.

"Yeah-" Peter nodded "I just got this really weird feeling of... foreshadowing"

"Right" Ben nodded "Any idea why?"

"Not a clue" Peter shrugged before a smirk appeared on his face "But I think I'll find out when I'm twenty" Ben chuckled before continuing on with the conversation by asking Peter a question.

"So Pete, when are you getting your hair cut again?" he asked "I think your Aunt and I both quite liked the whole quiff thing you had going and we kinda miss it, you gonna get it back any time soon?"

"Yeah, I think so" Peter nodded, twizzling several strands of spaghetti on his fork "I just haven't had time to get a hair cut yet"

"Well you better get it done quick Peter, you're going to meet your friend soon aren't you?" May asked to clarify.

"Yeah, I think I should be able to get to Oscorp on my board in decent time" Peter said "But, I need to write back to Twilight to see when she's going to be getting here"

"Alright" Ben nodded "Now that we're all settled on that we can get back to dinner"


Twilight stood in the foyer of the enormous Oscorp building with a look of amazement on her face. She could hear her older brother talking to his wife, Cadance, about who they thought Peter was going to be when they finally met him.

"Hey Twiley!" Cadance called over to her sister-in-law.

"Yeah?" Twilight asked, not taking her eyes off the large glass elevators that raced up and down through the eighty storey building.

"The friend we're waiting for... what was his name again?" Cadance asked.

"Peter, Peter Parker" Twilight answered.

"And what exactly does he look like?"

"Why?" Twilight asked in a puzzled tone.

"Because-" Shining intervened, stuffing his phone back inside his jacket and taking off his blue Aviators "We're about ready to start the tour and we've got our special tour guide waiting for me to give him the green light to come down"

"Special?" Cadance asked, putting a hand on her hip and shooting her husband a quizzical look "Who did we get, Norman Osborn?"

"Close" Shining said, rolling up the sleeves of his suit shirt and hanging his jacket over his shoulder and leaning up against the reception desk "We got someone else you'd like more: Harry Osborn" Twilight froze in place immediately at the mention of the man she'd had a crush on ever since she'd first seen him on TV. A smirk came onto Cadance's face as she patted her friend on the back.

"Aren't we the lucky ones?" she asked the smaller girl.

"Y-Yeah..." Twilight nodded weakly. There was the sound of a small argument outside the door, something to do with a member of the public wanting to be inside while the doorman insisted that the building was closed off to the public on that particular day.

While the group was busy watching the scuffle between the large doorman and the smaller teen with large glasses and a thick, quiff hairstyle holding a skateboard under his arm, there came a quiet laugh from the stairs that lead to the elevator.

The group turned to look at the sound and, in Twilight's case, a wide grin spread onto her face as she saw the light haired young man with a fringe combed over his right eye standing at the top of the stairs in a suit with his arms folded.

The young man who had been arguing with the doorman had burst through the security and had made his way past Twilight.

"I was delighted to find out that I'd be escorting these fine people through my father's company today" the young man in the suit said with a warm gesture to Twilight and her family, but a look of disgust came over his face when his eyes fell on the teen with brown hair "But I wasn't expecting my doormen to let in this piece of peasant filth" The two teens locked eyes angrily and the teen with the skateboard began to speak.

"If you've got a problem with me you rich snob, then we can just as easily take this outside" he growled angrily. The two glowered at each other for a long second, the others behind them looking at each other with nervous glances, before a smile came onto the teen in the suit's face and he held his arms up alongside him.

"Peter Parker!" he said with a wide grin, walking down the stairs.

"Harry Osborn" the second teen said with a chuckle, the two of them clapping hands together and pulling the other close for a shoulder bump, both of them clapping the other on the back.

"How've you been, you dusty old street dog?" Harry asked with a laugh as he looked up at his slightly taller friend.

"About as well as you, you plumped up rich goon" Peter grinned, stepping aside as Harry turned to address the rest of the group.

"Sorry about that folks, just an old joke my friend and I have going" Harry said "In the name of my father, I welcome you to Oscorp and hope I can show you anything you want to see"

"Right-" Shining said, walking over to Harry and shaking his hand with a polite smile "And what did you say your friend's name was?"

"Uhh-" Peter said, attempting to switch his skateboard to the other arm but ended up dropping it on his foot, yelping loudly before catching it under his foot, returning to shaking Shining's hand "Peter Parker" Cadance eyed the two teenagers up before nudging Twilight with her elbow and whispering to her.

"They're both cute, but if I were you, I'd go with Harry"

"Why?" Twilight asked.

"He seems much smoother than Puny Parker over there" Cadance shrugged.

"Be nice" Twilight snapped "He seems nice enough"

"Yeah, and that's about it to be honest" Cadance nodded before walking back over to her husband. The two adults introduced themselves to Harry before Twilight made her introduction. At this point the two teens locked eyes, both of them catching themselves off-guard upon doing so, and they both grinned widely.

"We ready to go?" Shining asked as he began to walking to the elevator. It was at this point that Twilight walked over to Peter and extended her hand.

"Nice to finally meet you Pete" Twilight said, looking up and down "Nice outfit" Peter looked down at himself and ran a quick critique of his own style: His classic faded green jacket and blue hoodie with thumb holes cut into them, a simple Rolling Stones 50th anniversary T-Shirt, a pair of dark blue jeans and a pair of black hi-top converses. Peter looked at Twilight, studying carefully what she was wearing: a pair of dark jeans with a white shirt and a thin, purple jacket with thick cuffs.

"Thanks, you too Twi" Peter nodded, shaking hands with her "Funny... somehow I thought you'd be taller"

"I can say the same thing about you" Peter chuckled, walking up the stairs to the elevator where the others had gotten to.

"Alright!" Harry said, thumbing a button on the control pad before turning to the group "I wanna take us to the recent developments lab but first I need to make a stop up at an older laboratory to pick something up for my dad... and I've got something for you to try out Peter" The elevator began to move and as it set off at a quick pace an announcement came out over the intercom.

"While at Oscorp we would like to remind you that the Sector Seven Bio-Engineering labs are currently on lock down due to a recent escape of Oscorp experiments" the voice called out over the speakers "If you are to see any signs of a suspicious looking animal or machine then you are advised to report it to any Oscorp employee you find and you are to avoid approaching or touching the creatures at all costs as they are highly dangerous"

"Escaped experiments?" Cadance asked with a worried expression "We're not in danger are we?"

"None at all Your Majesty" Harry answered with a confident smile "The sector is completely locked down, they're not getting out of there" harry smiled at the princess before his eyes drifted over to Peter who was staring down at the floor with an intense gaze.

"Wassup Pete?" Harry asked with a gesture to his friend "What's eating you?"

"Sector seven" Peter murmured under his breath before his eyes rocketed up to Harry and he took a small step forward "That's where my dad used to work before he disappeared isn't it?"

"Yeah, Richard Parker used to work there when we were kids" Harry nodded, patting his friend on the shoulder before looking around at the others and explaining "Peter here is the son of one of the brightest minds this company has ever seen work on its projects... a brain that good ol' Pete here has definitely inherited, right pal?"

"Well..." Peter mumbled with a scratch of the back of his head and a sheepish chuckle.

"C'mon Parker, there's nothing wrong with being Midtown High's smartest student is there?" Harry asked teasingly "I mean, all that happens to you is you get relentlessly bullied and ignored by just about every girl you talk to... and rely on your best friend Harry to bail you out of the fights you're thrown into, but hey, the grades are totally worth it, right?" Peter glared at his friend for a second before clapping jokingly on the side of the head with a smirk that was breaking through his anger façade, and the two of them started laughing as they got into a mock fight in the elevator.

"Oh, big man are we now?" Harry asked as the doors slid open to reveal an impatient looking man in his mid forties. He glared at everyone in the elevator before clearing his throat, getting the attention of Peter and Harry causing them to break up their scuffle.

"Harry" he said in a dry tone.

"Oh... hey Dad" Harry murmured, moving away from Peter and straightening out his suit. Mr Osborn stood with an extremely expensive looking suit on and a large black box tucked under his arm.

"I asked you to take these people around with you on a tour, not to scrap in the elevator with your friend here" Norman growled as he walked into the elevator. He looked over at Twilight, then to Cadance and finally to Shining before thumbing a button.

"Good afternoon Cadance" Norman said coldly, meaning none of the pleasantries he was exchanging "I'm surprised your Aunt let you off on your own to come here today"

"Well, she can't keep me locked in my room all the time now, I am twenty five after all" Cadance said with an equally bitter, false-pleasant tone as Norman's. Norman then turned to Twilight before asking her a very direct question.

"And who are you exactly?" he asked "Celestia's little pet project I assume, judging from the hair colour"

"Yes sir" Twilight nodded, being the third person to fake a pleasant attitude "My name is Twilight Sparkle"

"Forgive me if I don't remember your name, I've got a lot of things on my mind at the moment" Norman shrugged, turning to Shining with a simple nod "Armour"

"Osborn" Shining responded. Norman's tune changed completely when his eyes finally fell on Peter, a smile forming on his usually limp mouth.

"And you must be Peter Parker?" he asked, holding out the only hand he had offered anyone in a very long time to shake.

"Yes sir" Peter nodded with a nervous look in his eyes.

"I've heard a lot about you Peter, a lot of things about you hot on your father's heels in terms of intelligence" Norman chuckled "And from a few more sources that you may be indeed surpassing your father in terms of brilliance"

"Well, I wouldn't go quite that far sir, but, thank you" Peter nodded. The door opened and Norman went to step out of the elevator before stopping in the doorway, turning back to Peter.

"Oh, Peter, when you finish school, you bring your results to my office and we'll see if we can't get you a job somewhere in here, okay?" Norman asked.

"Oh, um, thank you sir" Peter nodded "I'm looking forward to it"

"That's good to hear Peter" Norman said before finally departing. The doors slid shut slowly and the elevator began to rise up once more before coming to a stop at the floor they desired. Nobody said what they were feeling, but everyone except Peter was feeling a strong resentment towards Norman for the way he had treated them.

"Right, where shall we start?" Harry asked, gesturing to any of the corridors that lead throughout the building. Cadance quickly put her hand up as she began to slowly bounce back and forth between her feet.

"Where's the bathroom?" she asked.

"Peter, you remember where the bathroom is on this floor don't you?" Harry asked.

"Harry... I haven't been in here for nearly eight years" Peter said with a cocked eyebrow.

"So, just close your eyes and use that memory of yours" Harry shrugged. peter nodded quickly and shut his eyes, seemingly mouthing directions to himself before opening his eyes and pivoting on his heel to the right with a whistle before pointing forwards.

"Good man" Harry said with a grin "You take Cadance and I'll get us set up in the dinner hall... try not to take too long OK?"

"Right" both Peter and Cadance nodded, catching each others eye and smiling.

"Lead the way Monsieur Parker" Cadance said with a wave of her hand.

"This way Frau Cadance" Peter responded, taking off at a decent speed.


"So Peter-" Cadance said as he walked alongside Peter "How did you and Twilight first get to know each other"

"Well..." Peter said, stuffing his hand in his jacket pocket while holding his board under his left arm "There was a little assignment we had to do in social studies where each of us were assigned a pen-pal that we had to write to for a month, and I got assigned Twilight as mine"

"Did you two hit it off well or were the first letters a little awkward to get going with?" Cadance asked, swerving out of the way of an oncoming trolley being pushed by a scientist who looked in quite a hurry.

"Well, it's always been awkward for me when it comes to talking to girls when I first try it, written or in person, so I did have to rewrite the letter a few times before I finally found something I settled on"

"You know, I never would've thought you had trouble talking to girls, you're talking to me now just fine" Cadance pointed out.

"I know, but usually I'm not talking to girls when I'm in my element" Peter nodded.

"Your element?" Cadance questioned.

"Oh, didn't I tell you?" Peter asked "I'm one of the missing Planeteers and I'm the element of science" Cadance blinked a few times before chuckling quietly, enjoying the dated but comedic reference.

"Science isn't an element Peter" Cadance said.

"Yeah?" Peter asked with a raised eyebrow "Neither is heart, but they still let him be one"

"Touché Parker" Cadance nodded "You got me there"

"Thank you, that's the line I try out when I meet new people" Peter said "It works all the time, sixty percent of the time" Cadance chuckled once more before recognizing the joke.

"Isn't that a joke from the first Anchorman?" she asked "That's plagiarism Pete"

"So?" Peter queried "Why innovate, when you can replicate?"

"You're quite the bank of quips, aren't you Peter?" Cadance asked.

"I always make jokes when I get nervous, it makes me feel safer as it really annoys people who are trying to hurt me" Peter explained.

"What?" Cadance said, patting him on the back "I'm not trying to hurt you"

"Not yet you're not" Pete shrugged "But that's because I haven't busted out my wicked bad puns yet" Cadance looked at Peter for a few seconds before stopping and folding her arms.

"You're actually scared right now aren't you?" she asked him.

"Uh-" Peter said, rubbing the back of his neck "A little, yeah"

"Why?" Cadance asked.

"I'm not used to talking to girls" Peter sighed "Especially gorgeous girls"

"Awww" Cadance said, patting Peter lightly on the cheek "You are just adorable Petey, but you don't need to be nervous, I don't bite... not until I get to know you better at least"

"Yeah, I wish I could just turn off my anxiety" Peter shrugged "But it's set in from years of public humiliation at school"

"Why, is it that bad for you at school?" Cadance asked as Peter continued to walk.

"Yeah, I don't really have that many things going for me at school, I'm mostly a loner, I don't have that much money to buy stuff like clothes and video games, I'm a complete nerd, I'm really not that good-looking of a guy-"

"Alright, lemme stop you there" Cadance said with her hand held out in front of her "You are not ugly Peter, if anything I'd say you're one of the very lucky few teenagers who've grown enough to be considered good looking by adults, and for a teenager who hasn't finished growing I'd say that you're a very attractive young man"

"Y-You think so?" Peter asked with a surprised expression.

"Yeah, and almost all of the things you described to me as negatives are things that a woman looks for in a man: they like nerds because they are smart and know a lot about science and maths, meaning they can fix things and work out money issues and find the most efficient way to spend and save money, you've said you don't have many friends which is a plus for your girlfriend as she'll have nobody else to share you with during the day... see, there's nothing wrong with you Peter, it's just that people just don't accept that you've matured faster then them"

"Jeez Cadance, that's a hell of a lot to say about someone after you've only known them for ten minutes" Peter said blankly.

"Trust me, I'm good at seeing people for who they are, you'd have to wear a mask for me to not be able tell if you're not who you say you are" Cadance chuckled before gritting her teeth "Are we nearly there yet?"

"Yup" Peter nodded, stopping in front of the door that had Sector Seven written on it before pointing to a door with a lady's icon on it "There you go, and try not to take too long, we've got a lot of ground to cover today"

"Sure, thanks Peter" Cadance grinned as she ducked into the toilet while whistling a merry tune. Peter leaned against the wall and immediately felt a draft coming from above him from an exposed vent that lead in from Sector Seven and continued throughout the rest of the building. As Peter looked down at his shoes, noticing a scuff on the white tips of them he felt something cold and hard drop onto his jacket.

"Oh great-" he growled "The vent's leaking" he looked at the spot on his jacket to see a wet patch where the water droplet had hit him. He moved out from under the vent just as another drop his him on the arm, rolling down the material of the jacket.

"I need to ask Harry to get someone to fix that, because that is annoying" He leaned against the large glass window that looked over the main entrance of the building and began to think about what could be in Sector Seven.

It was due to his preoccupation with his thoughts that he failed to notice the second water droplet begin to crawl down his arm and over onto his hand, its light but strong set of legs making it unable to be registered by the occupied teen.

Upon getting a scent of Peter's skin it reared briefly before jabbing its fangs down into Peter's hand, breaking the skin and injecting a small amount of its venom.

Cadance walked out of the toilets, drying her hands on her jeans as Peter hissed loudly, swinging his hand around and throwing the spider to the floor. Cadance squealed as she saw the size of the thin legged, large bodied insect before stamping on it with her shoe and grinding it into the carpet. Peter brought his hand up to his face and stared intently at the bite he had just received.

It was a small bite for a spider of that size but it stung something fierce. He ran his fingers over his hand and brushed out the fangs that had been torn away from removing the arachnid

"Little shit!" Peter hissed, wiping the blood from his hand on his jeans before stuffing it back in his pocket.

"You alright Peter?" Cadance asked with a concerned expression.

"Yeah, I'm fine thanks" Peter nodded "It was just a house spider, nothing to worry about"

"Well..." Cadance said "If you're sure, we can get back to the tour now"

"Good idea" Peter smiled gently "Let's get going"

The Web Begins to Weave Pt II

"And here we have the latest batch of special things Oscorp is working on in our weapons and development lab" Harry said, waving his hand at a large glass window that overlooked a huge room filled with extremely dangerous looking items that ranged from what appeared to be tread-less tanks equipped with rocket launchers to smaller, grenade-esque items that were coated in some kind of silver liquid. While Shining and Cadance discussed the more dangerous aspects to these creations both Peter and Twilight were up against the window, fogging up the glass as they glared at each machine. The first thing that caught Peter's eye was a large, flat piece of metal with what looked like thrusters beneath it.

"Harry?" Peter asked his friend, pointing to the piece of metal ahead "What's that?" Harry followed where Peter's point went and found what he was looking at.

"Ah, that's our Mk 1 Aries combat glider" Harry smirked "It was a project commissioned by my dad to be designed for the military to use when it's completed"

"It doesn't look too impressive" Peter noted.

"That's why its the Mk 1 and not anything else genius" Harry chuckled, folding his arms and looking into the room. Cadance walked over to the glass and stood beside Peter with her hands joined behind her back, focusing intently on the silver grenade objects.

"Hey Harry" Cadance said "What's so special about those grenades?"

"Glad you asked" Harry smiled "They're a new brand of grenade that's designed to destroy only human flesh and leave other materials unharmed"

"How fast does it do it?" Peter asked.

"Instantly" Harry answered. Peter raised an eyebrow before folding his arms and looking at the grenades.

"Keep and eye on him... he's got an idea going now" Harry smirked, pointing at Peter as he began to pace.

"There's a few ways that could work, but instantly?" Peter asked himself "That would have to be something extremely powerful but really precise too... nanomachines could be a thought, they could be released and immediately attack human flesh, but I'm not sure if they'd be able to destroy an entire human in less than a second"

"Maybe it's some form of quick-acting gas that gets released?" Twilight suggested with a wave of her hand.

"Possibly, but gas still wouldn't be able to work fast enough to completely incinerate a human being" Peter hummed "Well, Harry said they incinerate... so it has to have something to do with heat"

"It can't be fire that does it because that still can't do it immediately" Twilight nodded "Maybe..." The two teens turned around to each other, and with a direct point, they voiced their ideas.

"Light" they said.

"It makes sense doesn't it?" Peter asked "A flint and steel spark can create a spark bright enough to match the sun"

"And light is nothing more than a visible part of the energy spectrum that can contain enough energy to heat" Twilight nodded "If the grenade somehow replicates the heat of the sun-"

"-In a small but controlled area it could immediately incinerate a body without causing any more structural damage to a building than a small bit of sun bleaching" Peter finished. The two of them turned to Harry, their eyes buzzing with scientific genius as they stared at him.

"So?" Peter asked.

"Did we figure it out?" Twilight asked. Harry looked between the two of them for a long second before shrugging his shoulders.

"Haven't the foggiest" he chuckled "I just know that when you blow it up, it kills things" The other two teens' faces dropped instantly and Twilight walked back to the glass with a gutted expression.

"Hey, Pete" Harry said "You know that thing I said I had for you?"

"Yeah?" Peter responded.

"You up for grabbing it with me?" Harry asked.

"Sure" Peter shrugged "Where about's is it?"

"Just in the other wing around the corner" Harry nodded over to the door "C'mon, let's go" Peter followed after Harry as he opened the automatic door with a swipe of his hand. As the door closed behind them, Harry turned his head to Peter and asked him a question.

"You and Twilight aren't an item, are you?" Harry asked.

"Huh? No, we're just friends" Peter said with a shake of his head before a small smirk appeared on his face "But I suppose you're not asking me that to start a pleasant conversation are you?"

"How'd you tell?" Harry asked "Was it obvious?"

"A little" Peter nodded "But no, if you wanna try and get a date out of her then go ahead, I don't mind" Harry laughed and lightly punched Peter on the arm.

"I knew there was a reason we're best friends" Harry smirked.

"Is it because I help you with your homework and fashion tips and you help me out when I get beaten up?" Peter asked.

"All but one" Harry pointed out "You never give me fashion advice"

"I wonder why?" Peter pondered jokingly, looking at Harry's thousand dollar suit and his sixty dollar outfit "It must be because my sweg level is off the charts and your's is not"

"Is you suggesting that I has no sweg Perker?" Harry asked, returning to an old joke they had between each other.

"Lol faget, you has no sweg indeed" Peter chuckled before becoming slightly more serious "So sweg-less, what are we looking for?" Harry didn't answer the question immediately as he swerved into a room to the left and walked over to a desk where a small black box.

"This is what we're looking for" Harry said, eyeing up the room briefly before clicking his tongue "I'm thirsty, how about you?"

"Yeah, I'm quite parched" Peter nodded. Harry looked at Peter for a brief second before laughing quietly to himself.

"What?" Peter asked, puzzled as to why his friend was laughing.

"You always use big words in casual talk" Harry answered "You're such a swot"

"No I am not" Peter said sternly.

"Yes you are, now come on Count Swotula, we've gotta get back to the others and get us all to the food court again for refreshments" Harry said as he walked out of the room.

"Yeah, he's using words like refreshments and I'm the swot?" Peter asked irritably as he followed after Harry.


"Four bucks for a can of Dr. Pepper and a sandwich!?" Peter exclaimed angrily, getting the attention of everyone in the food court.

"Wassup Pete?" Harry asked from the table he was sitting at with the other members of the group.

"This vending machine is asking for an arm and a leg over here!" he snapped.

"You want me to pay for you?" Harry offered.

"No thanks, I'll get it" Peter growled, jamming the coins into the deposit slot "This better be the best frickin' sandwich I've ever eaten for three bucks" Peter stormed back over to the table, dropping the sandwich onto the table but taking the can over to the water fountain where he ran the top of the can under the cold and clean water before drying it on his jacket. He sat down at the table and cracked open the can, taking a sip before exhaling loudly.

"Refreshing" Peter said "But still overpriced"

"Why did you wash the top of the can?" Cadance asked.

"Because this thing was made and sat in a factory warehouse where you have no idea what's been crawling around on it" Peter explained "Could've had rats and all sorts peeing on it and stuff like that" Cadance's expression remained blank for a second before she pointed at Peter with a glare in her eyes.

"Thanks Pete" she said "You've just given me a brand new phobia"

"I try" Peter shrugged before turning to Harry "So what did we grab in that office?"

"A little science project I asked for to get you to build for us" Harry answered.

"Why?" Peter asked.

"So we can all see how much of a genius you are" Harry responded, sliding the black box across the table to Peter who spun it around and opened it.

"Whoa" Peter said in a surprised expression "This looks intimidating"

"Get to work Parker" Harry said. Peter nodded and began to take the items out of the box and arrange them in groups he could manage.

"So, first off-" Harry said, turning to Shining "You've barely said a word this entire time Mr Armour, you're not bored are you?"

"Not at all" Shining said with a smile "I'm just not that much of a talker really"

"I find that hard to believe" Cadance said with a chuckle "Every time you wake up it takes at least three hours for you to stop speaking"

"I am aware dear" Shining chuckled "But during the day-"

"Rubbish" Cadance dismissed with a wave of her hand "You're just trying to make yourself seem distant and brooding" Shining leaned back and took out his sunglasses, placing them on his face and pulling a duck face.

"Does it make me look sexy?" he asked, throwing up a gang sign.

"No, you just look like a madman, Shining" Twilight chuckled.

"Eh, close enough" Shining shrugged "You can't be an obsessed cop without looking a little deranged can you?"

"And what exactly does this obsession crave for?" Harry asked, resting his elbows on the table.

"Elbows off the table" Peter ordered, pointing at Harry with a screwdriver he had found in the box at him.

"Sorry dad" Harry said with a fake sneer, briefly flipping Peter off before the two of them looked at each other and laughing "Sorry Shining, you were saying?"

"There's not really that much I can say about the case" Shining shrugged "But what I can say is that I'm looking for some criminal crime lord in New York that, as of yet, no one knows who he is or what he looks like"

"That sounds frustrating as hell" Harry said in a shocked tone "I'm guessing that no leads means no progress right?"

"Yeah, he's tearing his hair out over it nearly every night" Cadance nodded, placing her hand on her husband's "Poor baby"

"Thanks Cadance" Shining nodded with a bemused expression.

"I try" she chuckled.

"Speaking of trying, what exactly is it you do Cadance?" Harry asked.

"I'm a fashion designer by trade, I own and run my own fashion brand called Candy Co." Cadance answered "We're releasing a few new designs for this winter next month and I designed most of them myself"

"I'm guessing that you don't do men's fashion do you?" Harry asked.

"Nope, we specialize in things ranging from dresses to lingerie" Cadance said with a shake of her head.

"I'm not sure if its a thing that designers do, but do you wear your own products?" Harry asked.

"Of course I do, it's great advertising" Cadance nodded.

"Do you model for your own stuff?" Harry asked.

"No, I get other people to" Cadance answered.

"Seems a bit wasteful" Peter said, not looking away from the small column he had built out of black pieces.

"Really?" cadance asked "Why do you think so?"

"Have you looked at yourself recently?" Peter asked "From what I've heard when the girls in my school dream of being the perfect woman, they usually describe you"

"And where did you hear this Peter?" Cadance asked.

"When Flash stuffed me in a locker for a few hours I overhead a few girls talking about everything they liked about you" Peter said, glancing easily over the fact he was stuffed into a locker as if it were the norm.

"And what did they like about me?" Cadance queried.

"Eeverything: Height, weight, body shape, face structure, hair and eye colour, breast size, all the things girls want when they dream of being a princess" There was a brief moment of silence before Shining perked an eyebrow.

"When were you shoved in a locker?" Shining asked.

"A few days ago" Peter answered quickly "The football team thought it would be funny to go generic and cliché with the bullying, I think I'm just lucky they didn't give me a swirlie"

"Is that still even a thing?" Shining asked in a bewildered expression "I think the last time I saw that was in some punk-rock music video in the earlier parts of the two thousands"

"I hadn't heard it happening to anyone in a while so I figured it had just died out" Peter shrugged, slotting some kind of container into the column and screwing a cap back onto it.

"Why are we glancing over this like it's nothing to be worried about?" cadance asked in a worried tone "Peter's just admitted that he's bullied at school yet we're just acting like it's normal!"

"It is Cadance" Peter said to her "I don't think you were considered unpopular at school so you were probably unaware of the inner turmoil of the dorks at school who were at the bottom of the social ladder"

"Besides, its been a good few years since he's actually gotten his ass kicked" Harry shrugged "A lot of people know Peter's my friend and they don't tend to actually hurt him any more because of that"

"Why are people scared of you Harry?" Twilight asked "Is it because of your dad?"

"Nope" Harry said bluntly "It's because I'd kick the hell out of most people if they try anything with me"

"Fair enough" Twilight nodded "Harry?"

"Yes?" Harry responded.

"Can we get some more food please?" she asked.

"Yeah, sure" Harry nodded "Go right ahead, just ask the chef to give me the bill after you guys are done" There was suddenly a loud whirring noise from the device that Peter had built before it fired a thin cable up into the ceiling with a hook attached to the top of the wire.

"Huh" Peter said "I figured it would do that"

"Nice job fixing that Peter" Harry said "You know what that is?"

"Yeah, its a high power pneumatic grappling hook attached to an ultra strong poly-fibre wire that's supposed to be able to support the weight of a police SUV" Peter explained "I think it's supposed to be used to tow large objects or act as breaching equipment for SWAT teams, right?"

"Exactly" Harry nodded "How'd you figure that out?"

"Says so in the manual" Peter said, handing Harry a single sheet of paper with the description of the grappling hook printed on it.

"Fair enough" Harry shrugged as he folded the piece of paper and stuffed it into his pocket "You want me to cover the costs of another meal for you?"

"You know I don't like to mooch of people Harry" Peter declined with a smile.

"Tough tits, you're mooching buddy" Harry said, patting Peter on the shoulder and standing up "Right, let's get eating"


As Peter walked through the corridors of Oscorp behind his friends he could feel an constant lurching sensation in his stomach, causing him to feel sick. This effect went unnoticed on Peter until Twilight turned around to look at something they had passed, leading her to notice Peter's sick-looking face.

"Pete... you alright?" she asked.

"I-I think so" Peter said, placing a hand on his stomach and shaking his head to try and clear the sick feeling.

"You look terrible Peter" Twilight said "Do you need to sit down for a second?"

"I... yeah, maybe" Peter nodded after a moment of pause.

"Harry?" Twilight called over to the leading teen.

"Yup?" he asked, pivoting on his heel and looking at Twilight.

"Pete's not looking so good" Twilight answered "I think he's about to throw up"

"Really?" Peter asked with a chuckle "I don't feel like I'm gonna throw up... just like my face is gonna fall off" Harry walked over to peter and looked at him in the face.

"Jeez Peter, Twilight's right" Harry nodded "You look like shit"

"Thanks buddy" Peter growled.

"I think you should go to the medical bay for a while and just lie down" Harry said with a grin "I don't want you passing out and make one of us to carry you there"

"...Right" Peter nodded "I'll go there now"

"I think one of your allergies is acting up Peter" Harry suggested "You didn't eat any sea food did you?" Peter put a hand to his face, feeling a large amount of sweat coat his hand which he quickly wiped on his jeans.

"I... I think there might've been a bit of tuna in that extortion sandwich I ate" Peter joked, swaying slightly on his feet.

"Easy there pal" Harry said, placing his hands on Peter's shoulders to steady him "I think someone better go with you so you don't die on your way there"

"I'll go" Cadance offered "I trained as a first aider and I can probably help him out if he does pass out"

"Well, I can't argue with that" harry nodded "Thanks Princess"

"No problem" Cadance said, turning around and placing a hand on Peter's shoulder "Let's get going kiddo" Peter nodded weakly and began to walk forwards, guiding Cadance to the medical bay as she attempted to keep him from slouching and slamming face first into a wall.

"So you're allergic to tuna?" Cadance asked as they walked.

"Yeah" Peter nodded weakly, dragging his feet across the carpet "Have been ever since I was a kid, drives my Aunt May nuts because her favourite meal to cook is tuna steak"

"Poor woman" Cadance chuckled "But, you're a teenager after all and you're built to raise cain aren't you?"

"I guess" Peter said, turning left as they made it past the food court "Why does the walk have to be so long to get to the medical bay?"

"Because there wasn't one built here?" Cadance offered in response.

"They should've built one med bay for every sector in this building" Peter growled.

"Well you can pitch that idea to Norman Osborn when you feel better can't you?" Cadance asked.

"Maybe I will" Peter nodded. The two of them walked the rest of the way to the medical bay in silence and Cadance handed the hazy teen over to the medical staff and explained what was wrong with him. They all criticised him for forgetting his allergies and helped him into one of the beds where they told him to simply sleep his sickness off. The teen closed his eyes and rested his head against the pillow, hearing Cadance wish him a goodbye as she walked back to where they had come from.


When Peter opened his eyes he could see that the sun had set from the window next to him and that it was now the dark of the night. he attempted to rub his eyes to clear the blurriness from them but only ended up punching himself in the lens of his glasses.

"Ow!" he hissed, looking around the room to discover that it was completely blurry. He figured that he must've fogged up his glasses while sleeping and removed them to wipe them but he discovered that everything cleared up as he removed his glasses.

"W-What?" Peter asked himself quietly, looking at the lenses of his clear glasses before holding them in front of his face. He peered through the lenses and the world once again became blurry.

"Weird" Peter muttered to himself as he slipped his glasses into his pocket. he looked around the med bay once more and discovered that the rest of the staff had disappeared from the ward, leaving him alone. he shook his head and climbed off the bed. As he set his feet down he felt surprisingly lighter, more flexible all of a sudden. It was as if his joints had loosened and he was able to move in different ways.

"Right" Peter nodded, completely bewildered by what was happening to him. He took his phone out of his pocket and unlocked it before calling Harry. The dial tone sounded for a few seconds before it clicked and he heard Harry's voice.

"Hey Pete, how are you feeling now?" Harry asked.

"Better" Peter answered "Where are you guys right now?"

"Well we finished the tour about half and hour ago and we're just standing outside now waiting for our rides to arrive" Harry explained "Are you on your way out now?"

"Yeah, I'll see you in a few minutes" Peter nodded.

"Right, see you then buddy" Harry responded. Peter hung up the call and stuffed his phone back into his pocket before picking up his skateboard from the floor. After checking to see that nobody else was around he set the board down on the floor and placed his foot on it before kicking off and riding it through the halls. As he came to the elevator he felt a very strange feeling overcome him, a sensation of pure stupidity that felt right at home in his head. He observed the elevator as it came down before his eyes slowly rolled over to the staircase entrance.

"Fuck it" Peter grinned after a moment of consideration "Why not?" He walked into the stairwell and looked at the thirty or so floors that lead down to the ground floor and the foyer. He placed the kickstand of the board onto the top step and placed his foot on the board.

"Here we go" Peter said, his heart in his mouth "This could go so wrong" He leaned forward and placed his weight onto the top kickstand and he began to lurch forward. The front wheels of the board began to jump as he rode down the stairs and towards the wall. He quickly ollied into the air and shifted his weight, causing the board to slam into the wall. As Peter hung there for a brief second he felt another dumb urge. He pushed off the wall and tucked his front legs into his stomach, flipping down half the other set of stairs and landing on the hand railing. He began to gain more and more speed as floor after floor went past, his grinding of the rail causing a great screeching noise that echoed throughout the stairwell. As Peter reached the bottom floor he once again flipped off the rail and slammed through the door and into the main foyer. He skidded to a halt and looked up into the tower with excited breath.

"That... was... ncredible" he panted "I have to do that again sometime"

"Hey you!" an angry voice yelled from across the room "Get off that skateboard!"

"No can do pal" Peter shrugged "I was in a freak gluing accident and now this board and I are one"

"Don't get smart kid" the doorman snapped "Just get outside with that thing"

"Can do sir!" Peter winked, pushing off towards the automatic glass door, seeing Harry and the others on the other side of the street, leaning against a railing and talking to each other. Peter smirked excitedly as he put on another burst of speed as the door opened, leading to a staircase of nearly forty steps down to the New York side walk. Peter hurtled out of the door at great speed and after a quick angle change he ollied high into the air, higher than he thought possible, and landed on the stone railings on the steps and began to grind down them. The noise caught the attention of the New Yorkers who were out that night and they all rolled their eyes at another idiot teenager who was going to get himself hurt. With a loud whoop of exhilaration Peter once more jumped over the large statues that sat at the end of the rails on the stairs and he flew out into the street, dodging through cars and cabs, all of whom loudly beeped their horns at him as he merely laughed.

"Pete?" Harry yelled at him as Peter ollied up the side walk and landed the flat of his board on the railings they were leaning against. He slid down the face of the board and landed on the ground while pressing his back up against the board to prevent it from falling to the ground. Peter folded his arms and looked between everyone with an excited grin on his face.

"Well-" Shining noted "You seem better"

"I feel better" Peter nodded "I've never skated like that before in my life"

"That was dangerous Peter" Shining said "I should arrest you for something like that" Peter's smile dropped off his face as he looked at Shining with a gaunt expression. Second passed before Shining laughed quietly, patting Peter on the shoulder and smiling at him.

"Don't worry Peter, I'm not that much of a hard-ass" Shining said "Just be careful when skateboarding in the streets"

"Right" Peter nodded with a sigh of relief. There was suddenly a loud blaring of a limousine horn and the group turned around to see a black limo pull in next to them.

"Well, this is our ride" Shining said, turning to look at Harry "Thanks for the tour Mr Osborn"

"Thanks for letting me take you around" Harry nodded, shaking Harry's hand "It was my pleasure" Cadance turned and shook Harry's hand with a smile.

"I enjoyed today Mr Osborn, thank you" Cadance said. Next up was Twilight, who gave Harry and very friendly smile and shook his hand.

"So... Friday night, right?" Harry asked in a confirming voice.

"Friday night" Twilight nodded "Wear something nice Harry"

"I will" Harry grinned. Twilight then turned to Peter and shook his hand with a grin.

"It was nice to finally meet you egghead" Twilight joked "You're not as big of as a loser as you told me you were"

"And you're still shorter than I am" Peter said, shaking her hand firmly "See you later Twi?"

"See you later Pete" she smirked before walking into the limo. Shining then turned to Peter and shook his hand with a polite smile.

"It was good to meet someone almost as nerdy as my sister for once" Shining chuckled "Now she can babble about science with someone who understands it"

"Glad to be of service" Peter grinned "It was nice to meet you Mr Armour"

"You too kid, look after yourself" Shining returned. Finally was Cadance who, instead of shaking Peter's hand, hugged the smaller teen tightly, nearly squeezing the life out of him.

"It was great meeting you Peter" she said with a beaming smile "I hope we can all get together and do something else again sometime soon"

"Uhhh... me too Cadance" peter managed to cough out, his air supply being cut off by Cadance's rib crushing hug. She let go of him and walked back over to her husband who looked at her with a peculiar expression.

"What?" she asked after a second.

"You nearly killed the poor guy" Shining chuckled as he climbed into the limo.

"Nearly, but I didn't" she shrugged, waving to the other two "Bye guys!" The two teens waved to Cadance and everyone else as the limo drove away into the crowd of cabs and cars, leaving the two of them alone.

"So..." Peter said, kicking up dirt before finishing his sentence "Cadance has to be the hottest thing I've ever seen in my life"

"Damn right" Harry nodded "That woman has the perfect everything from head to toe"

"Shining is a lucky man indeed" Peter said.

"But there is one thing I noticed about the two of them-" Harry added.

"That Shining is really punching above his weight?" Peter asked, glancing at harry from the corner of his eyes.

"Very much so" Harry agreed.

"So... you got a date with Twilight I presume?" Peter asked, stuffing his hands in his pockets and looking at his friend.

"Yup, Friday night we're going to see that new movie: The Fault in Our Stars" Harry nodded with a wide grin.

"Try not to cry, I've heard that movie is really sad" Peter pointed out.

"Maybe I will cry at it, that's a normal reaction to sad things" Harry shrugged before nudging his friend teasingly "I don't just there and tank through sad movies like you, you heartless bastard"

"Hey, I'm not heartless" Peter said, failing to hide his grin.

"Bullshit!" Harry accused with a pointed finger "You nearly cried laughing at the Notebook!"

"That's cause the movie was a piece of shit!" Peter yelled in his defence, taking his hands out of his pockets and holding them out by his hands.

"Yeah, it would've been forgiveable if you were at home but we were in the middle of a school assembly in front of parents and teachers" Harry reminded "The sad parts came on and over everyone trying not to cry you just hear you in the back of the room, nearly fucking dying with laughter" The two looked at each other and just burst out laughing at the memory.

"Dude, you remember that time we played 'Allan' in the detention reminders assembly?" Peter asked, clapping his friend on the back.

"Dude, that was priceless!" Harry yelled, doubling over with laughter and slamming a knee of his hand while Peter leaned back against the fence,tears streaming down both of their faces as they laughed.

"The look on Mr Dudley's face when he saw you shout Allan behind your hand and you just pulled a rape face at him..." Harry said, gasping for breath "It was fucking brilliant"

"My Aunt May nearly killed me when she found out about that" Peter said, wiping the tears from his eyes and trying to stand up straight "Ohhh, fuck me man, we're hilarious"

"No we're not!" Harry exclaimed "And that's the worst part about it, nobody else found it funny except us!" The two of them remained there laughing for several minutes before Harry's ride rolled up.

"Alright, you want a ride home man?" Harry said, still chuckling as he opened the door.

"No, I'm good thanks dude" Peter declined "It's a great night and I feel like skateboarding home"

"You sure?" Harry asked.

"Positive, thanks man" Peter assured.

"Alright then" Harry nodded, fist bumping Peter as he climbed inside the car "I'll see you at school next week"

"Yeah, you too man" Peter said, watching as the door closed and the car drove away.

"Right, skateboard time" Peter chuckled to himself, picking his board up from behind him and placing it on the floor.


Peter had his mind focussed on many things as he skated through the city, his meeting with Twilight, homework projects, school work, his aunt and uncle, and, most importantly, his close encounter with Cadance's bust. His mind was so preoccupied with his thoughts that he failed to notice his board had veered slightly to the left and had steered him straight into the road and into the oncoming path of a large SUV. But before Peter noticed, before the driver his blared his horn and before the lights of the headlights got caught in Peter's eyes something in the back of his mind told him: Forward. By some kind of divine intervention Peter knew what was coming and he knew that he had no chance of avoiding it. Nevertheless, he bent his knees and threw himself skyward, trying for some bizarre reason to jump over the car. And by some golden goddess: It worked. peter flew high over the car, into the air and straight into a building in front of him.

"Oh shit!" Peter yelled, holding his arms out in front of him and splaying his fingers he slammed into the wall. He prepared his legs for the pain of hitting the ground which seemed so far below him, but, the feeling of falling never came. Peter opened his eyes and looked down at the ground beneath him, remaining as far away from him even as the seconds ticked by.

"What-" Peter said, looking all around him as he was sticking to the wall "The fuck?"

The Web Begins to Weave Pt III

Peter's eyes remained focussed on the wall as his heart thudded in his chest. His hands and the tips of his toes felt like they were glued to the surface of the old brick wall and he couldn't seem to pull any of his limbs away.

"W-What-" Peter grunted, trying desperately to yank his hand away from the brick. With a hefty grunt he ended up tearing the top layer of the brick's surface off with a loud cracking sound, the pieces sticking to the tips of his fingers. Fearing that he would fall without the support of his hand he slammed his hand back onto the wall with all his strength and punched straight through the brick layer entirely, now getting his hand stuck inside the structure.

"Holy shit..." Peter whispered. He closed his eyes and thought his hardest about letting go of the wall, as if by some strange anomaly this new feature of his biology was under his control. But, as soon as he began to think of releasing his grip he felt himself begin to slip down the wall and upon regretting his choice immediately, her wished to stick to the wall again.

"Alright Parker, you've got two directions to go here" Peter mumbled to himself "And as much as I'd like to be back on the ground, I think up is the shortest way down at this point... now just, take it slow" With a mental command Peter was able to tell one of his feet to release the wall and then, once it was in the desired position, to stick once again. He repeated this process until he was at the top of the wall where there was a slight overhang where he would have to let go of the wall in order to grab and pull himself up. Peter knew from his limited time during rock climbing that this was one of the most terrifying things in the world to do as he would have to rely on his feet to hold his weight.

"And I'm not wearing a harness or a safety rope" Peter said with a terrified chuckle "If I mess this up I can at least put on a smile for the poor bystander that finds the puddle of Peter Parker on the floor" With a deep breath Peter released his hands and attempted to grab the overhang, only to feel his feet slip out from underneath him, sending him lurching forward and smashing his nose into the wall, recoiling backwards and beginning to plummet down to the ground.

"No!" Peter roared, reaching for the wall only to be too far away to reach. The fall lasted a few seconds but the pain that sprung up was enough to let him know he was alive. His back was the first thing to hit the floor, followed swiftly by his legs and then his head. Agony raced through Peter's body and he released a pained groan as he weakly reached up into the air and flipped his middle finger up to the overhang on the roof.

"How..." Peter moaned "How am I still alive?" Peter looked around to see that nobody had noticed him fall, meaning no one had seen him doing his weird new thing. Peter, feeling once again full of energy, rolled back, placing his hands on the floor behind his shoulders, before kicking up into the air and getting back onto his feet. He looked himself over and marvelled at the fact that not only was he not dead, he was also unharmed. He felt his nose and discovered that there wasn't a mark from where his entire body weight had caused him to slam it into a wall.

"What the actual fuck is going on right now?" Peter asked, looking at his hands with amazement "When did all this happen?" He looked around briefly before deciding to give himself a once over to see what he could now do with his new abilities.

"No, these aren't just abilities..." Peter laughed "These are super powers" He bent his legs quickly, straightened and stretched his back before deciding to do yet again another stupid thing. He bent his knees once more before leaping high into the air, flipping himself over backwards and landing lightly on his feet.

"Holy shit" Peter laughed, clenching his fists as an adrenaline rush surged through his body "This is incredible" After having learned that his feet alone couldn't keep him on the wall, he tensed his legs and leaped high into the air again, sticking to the wall and beginning to crawl up it. This time as he reached the top of the wall he kept his hands flat on the overhang and climbed straight over it.

"Probably should've done that in the first place" Peter shrugged, walking over the rooftop and looking down onto the smaller buildings just ten feet below him. Peter suddenly felt a tingling feeling in the bottom of his feet, tingling in his fingers and legs that made him want to do nothing more than jump.

"Ready Parker?" he asked himself aloud, taking a few steps back, swinging his arms by his sides as he psyched himself up "You better be" With that Peter took of at full speed and threw himself off of the roof, seemingly flying forwards as several buildings were cleared in a single leap.

"Superman, eat your heart out!" Peter yelled, panting from excitement. Peter's mind seemed to have opened up, analysing and planning routes for him to run through that would test his new abilities as well as giving him a rush. After skidding under a raised vent Peter threw himself into a roll and once his feet were on the floor he sprung up, corkscrewing through a small gap between two buildings. Peter was quickly coming up on a much bigger building in front of him and it caused a smile to crack on his face. He stepped forward with both feet before bending his legs and throwing himself as high as he could go, clearing the top of the building's edge by a good three feet. Peter ground to a halt at the edge of the building and sat down with his legs dangling off the edge, his chest heaving.

"What the hell happened to me?" he asked, placing his face in his hands and laughing. It was at this moment he remembered the spider bite, looking at the mark on his hand, and his eyes widened.

"It... it must've been a spider from Sector Seven's experiments" Peter realized. He stood up and looked at the moon high in the sky, his body running on a high that he felt as if he'd never be able to reach again. His daydream was interrupted however when his phone began to vibrate in his pocket. He took the device out and answered the call from his Aunt May.

"Hello?" Peter asked.

"Peter, where are you?" May asked.

"I'm still in New York" Peter answered with a grin.

"You were supposed to be home hours ago!" May exclaimed angrily "It's nearly two in the morning!"

"No way" Peter said, taking the phone away from his ear to check the time "Crap Aunt May, I got distracted and I didn't realize what time it was"

"Well hurry up and get home Peter" May sighed, sounding extremely tired on the other end of the phone.

"I will... are you gonna be asleep when I get in?" Peter asked, looking over the edge of the building.

"I'll try to be" May responded "I love you Peter"

"Love you too Aunt May" Peter smirked "Goodnight" With that closing statement Peter hung up the call and slipped his phone back into his pocket and, with a gentle lean, went head first off the side of the building. He flipped over just a metre above the floor and landed on his feet, straightened up and walked away as if nothing had happened, stuffing his hands into his pockets and whistling a merry tune.

With Great Power...

As the days went by and the school week arrived, Peter began to become more cocksure and confident due to his perceived indestructibility given to him by his super powers. He had begun to mouth off more to those who picked on him, silently begging for one of them to make the verbal arguments escalate into something physical so he would be able to destroy anyone who attempted to harm him. The problem was that Peter's new-found confidence slowly grew into arrogance and he began to shoot his mouth off to anyone who even looked at him the wrong way. He had seen the football team have to restrain themselves from starting a fight with him, either because their girlfriends held them back or they deemed Peter unworthy to waste their time on. It was in the next week of school that Peter was greeted by a friendly face that he didn't expect to see in Midtown. He was pulling books out of his locker when he felt a gentle tap on his shoulder. He pivoted on his heel to see a bright eyed young woman wearing a purple skirt and a simple white, button up shirt with a steel bracelet on her left wrist.

"Twilight?" Peter asked in surprise "What're you doing here?"

"My folks and I moved from Chicago a few days after we met up, something about being closer to Cadance and Shining and wanting to get me the best schooling possible after Celestia's teaching days done" Twilight explained. Peter opened his mouth to speak but fell silent when he heard a loud jeer from across the corridor from one of the football team.

"Now that's something I thought I'd never see!" he exclaimed "Is that Puny Parker talking to a girl without getting a drink poured on him?" Peter smirked, thinking up a witty response, but he was cut off by Twilight throwing her own response back at him.

"What's the matter big guy?" she asked in a mocking tone "Do you want me to throw my drink on you instead on Peter? Then again, looking at you, having an energy drink thrown on you is probably the closest thing to a shower you've had in a long while" The football player ground his teeth angrily before yelling back.

"What are you?" he demanded "His girlfriend or something?"

"Not his-" Harry said, walking into the argument and putting his arm around Twilight's waist "Mine" This piece of information caused the football player to back down and become a lot more respectful.

"Oh... hey Harry" he said with a nervous chuckle "Sorry about that"

"Remember the rule we all agreed on?" Harry asked, ignoring the apology.

"Uhhh... I think so" he nodded slowly.

"What was it?" Harry queried.

"Leave Peter alone and I get to keep my teeth?" he recited.

"Good, now make yourself scarce" Harry said, gesturing with his thumb.

"S-Sorry" he mumbled, hurrying away with his head hanging low. Harry turned back to Peter who had since turned around and started rummaging through his locker once more while whistling a happy tune. Harry glared daggers into his back for a brief second before speaking up.

"You're welcome" he growled.

"I could've handled it" Peter shrugged, grabbing his camera out of his locker and hanging it around his neck.

"No you couldn't!" Harry snapped "He would've snapped you in half!" Peter stuffed one hand into his jacket pocket and held his camera with the other.

"But we didn't get to see that, did we?" Peter chuckled, closing his locker and turning around and beginning to walk away.

"Pete, what the hell's happening to you?" Harry asked, stepping away from Twilight for a brief second and placing his hand on Peter's shoulder "You're becoming more and more of an asshole everyday"

"Maybe" Peter sighed "Or maybe I'm just changing into who I'm supposed to be"

"No Peter, you're not becoming a bad person" Harry countered "You're just having a weird few days" Peter looked over his shoulder at Harry with a blank expression.

"I prefer my version" Peter nodded, walking away with his eyes locked onto the ground. Harry watched as his friend rounded a corner and disappeared from view.

"What... the hell has gotten into him?" Harry muttered.

"I've never heard of him acting like this before" Twilight said "He never came off as cocky in his letters"

"He's not, he's usually a neurotic who can't even muster the willpower to fight back when someone hits him" Harry nodded "Never mind attempting to start fights with people like that"

"Maybe we should both try talking to him at lunch today" Twilight suggested.

"Yeah, you'd probably know how to reason with him better than me" Harry agreed.

"Really?" Twilight asked in surprise "You're his best friend, surely you'd do better at that?"

"You'd think, but I've never been good at cheering Peter up, I normally just end up yelling at him and he just gets worse" Harry admitted, scratching the back of his head awkwardly "I think you'd be smarter about it then I would, I'm the kind of friend Peter needs when he needs a slap in the face to get him back to normal"

"Right" Twilight said, placing a hand on her hip and shaking her head "I'll help out as best I can"

"Thanks Twi" Harry grinned, kissing her briefly on the cheek as he wrapped his arm around her.

"No problem" Twilight chuckled, blushing briefly.

"I just hope Peter doesn't get himself into trouble" harry sighed "I don't wanna have to kick the shit out of the football team for him"

"Harry-" Twilight scolded "Don't swear"

"Sorry" Harry chuckled.


Harry and Twilight walked hand in hand out to where they heard Peter had gone. He'd apparently gone to finish off some homework on the basketball court where, coincidentally, there was a practice game of basketball going being played in preparation for the next season's first game.

"Why would he hang out here?" Twilight asked.

"He's come out here looking for trouble" Harry said angrily "He's going to get his ass kicked if he goes through with this" The two of them made it to the court just as they saw the ball being thrown out of bounds, rolling towards the leg of a teen hunched over a piece of paper and a textbook.

"Peter!" Harry called out to him. Peter's eyes glanced up at him and he gave a brief smile before turning back to his work.

"Hey, Parker!" an agitated Flash Thompson yelled from across the court "Throw the ball back in already!" Peter looked down at the ball on the ground before slowly dragging his eyes back to Flash. He set down his books and grabbed hold of the orange ball, standing up and moving into the court.

"What is he..." Twilight mumbled.

"You want the ball?" Peter asked quietly.

"Yeah, give it here now" Flash growled "We need to get our practice in and your dumb ass isn't going to stop us!" Peter passed the ball behind his back into his other hand as he walked closer to Flash.

"If you want it so badly-" Peter said, holding the ball out in front of him with a smirk "Take it" There was a chorus of shocked 'ooh's from everyone gathered to watch as Flash rolled his neck and walked closer to Peter. Flash reached out for the ball quickly but Peter swept it behind his back, switching hands and holding it out in front of him again in less than a second, making Flash's eyes widen in surprise.

"Oh, too slow" Peter jeered "How did you make the team again?"

"That idiot" Harry growled "Peter, just give him the ball!" Peter ignored the warning completely and gestured for Flash to grab the ball again.

"Come on Flash" Peter said, shaking the ball slowly "Just grab the ball" Flash made a movement for the ball with both hands only to have Peter flip his hand to face the ground and bounce the ball at an angle, causing it to bounce up into his other hand. He held it up and spun it around on the tip of his finger while whistling mockingly.

"Eugene, seriously, you are slow" Peter laughed "Alright, how 'bout I don't move this time, is that fair to you?" Flash's temper was obviously flaring quickly because of Peter's belittling statements and the crowd was nearly silent as the tension between the two teens escalated even further.

"Don't ever call me that again" Flash snarled, feigning to go for the ball in an attempt to psyche Peter out. The attempt failed as it only caused Peter to take the ball off his finger and gently throw it forwards, straight into Flash's forehead.

"Oh sorry Eugene, would you prefer if I called you Ginny?" Peter asked, crossing his arms and cocking an eyebrow. Flash's head was knocked back for a brief second from the impact but when he faced Peter again his eyes were alight with anger and he was panting heavily.

"Oh shit" Harry sighed, slapping a palm to his face "Now he's fucked" Flash balled his fist and leaned back with a furious glare on his face. Peter's mind flared up once again, his new sense going off to warn him of the approaching punch. Flash roared in fury as he swung a powerful punch aimed for Peter's right temple. While for the others the punch came in a blink of an eye, Peter's new advanced senses slowed the world down for him and because of this the punch came at a steady pace but still and easily dodge-able one. With a simple bending of his right leg he was able to lean out of the way of the swing without even uncrossing his arms.

"Whoa there Flash pal" Peter said with a grin "I almost felt the wind from that one there. Try aiming next time!"

"Shut the fuck up!" Flash yelled, throwing another punch, this time a gut punch that was once again dodged by Peter spinning to the side and stopping behind Flash.

"I mean, if you wanna hit me you should at least try here guy" Peter said, cockily checking his nails. Flash spun around with a wide swing of his left arm that Peter simply ducked under it.

"I hate to be a downer here Flash-" Peter said, faking a yawn "But I am getting bored here" Peter saw Flash's eyes glance over to the stands and he knew that this fight would no longer be a fair one. Flash put up his hands into a fighting stance and rolled his neck.

"I'm gonna smash you into pieces Parker" Flash growled.

"Seriously?" Peter asked, raising his hands in a gesture of disbelief "That's the best you can come up with. You could of at least said something like... I don't know 'If you don't stop fucking with me I'm gonna give you a free ride out of here, in an ambulance', you know, something more creative" As soon as he finished his senses went off again, alerting him to something approaching quickly behind him. He knew he could easily duck to the side but instead he decided he'd give them a reason to try.

"Help him Harry!" Twilight yelled. Peter placed his feet together and after a quick bend of his legs he leaped high into the air, flipping backwards three times as another member of the team charged underneath him. Peter landed on the floor in a low crouch with his hood falling onto his head, just above his eyes.

"...Which one?" Harry asked in surprise.

"F-Flash?" the second basketball player asked.

"Just fucking waste him already!" Flash roared, rushing forward and throwing punch after punch with aggressive yells. The entire crowd watched in awe as Peter effortlessly dodged every punch Flash threw at him with a confident look on his face the entire time. It was clear that Flash began to tire soon and as soon as his weakest punch was thrown Peter held up his hand and caught the punch, closing his fingers around Flash's fist.

"You tired?" he asked with a smirk "Too bad, because I'm just getting started" Flash began to yell in pain as Peter tightened the grip around his hand, Peter's smirk becoming something much more sinister.

"Peter!" Harry yelled, storming over to Peter and grabbing hold of his shoulder "That's enough Pete!" Peter looked at Harry with a mad look in his eyes as he was experiencing an enormous power trip.

"Why should I stop?" Peter laughed "It's not like anyone can do anything to me if I don't" Peter turned back to Flash who was now crying in pain as his hand seared in pain.

"Peter stop!" Harry yelled, curling back his hand and slamming it into Peter's jaw and knocking some sense back into him. Peter was amazed as to why his sense hadn't told him that Harry was going to hit him. He released Flash's destroyed hand and looked at Harry with a much more sane look on his face. The two looked at each other for a long second before Peter seemed to realize what he'd done. What scared Harry the most was the fact that Peter quickly hid his disgust of himself and a cocky look came back onto his face as he dusted his hands off.

"Thanks Harry" he smirked "I think I was going a bit overboard for a second there"

"Parker!" a furious voice screamed as Peter was grabbed quickly by the scruff of his collar by the principal of the school.

"Oh, fuck" Peter sighed, not having the patience for this.

Comes Great Responsibility

Peter leaned back in the chair he'd been made to sit in with his hands behind his head and a cocky smile on his face. His Uncle Ben had just finished listening to the principal's explanation of what had occurred out on the basketball courts and upon hearing the story he turned to look at Peter with a furious expression.

"Is that what you're doing now Peter?" Ben asked with his arms folded.

"What're you talking about?" Peter asked, checking his nails, rubbing the nail of his middle finger with his thumb to try and smooth the jagged nail.

"You know damn well what I'm talking about boy!" Ben exclaimed furiously, slamming his fist down onto the principal's desk, making the principal jump and Peter's eyes widen in shock. He had made his uncle mad at some points in his life, he'd angered almost everyone he'd met to be honest. But this wasn't just him angry, Ben was furious at Peter for what he'd done. Peter sat up straight and lowered his arms to his lap as he looked at his uncle.

"Uncle Ben, there's no reason for you to be so upset..." Peter said slowly. Ben turned away from Peter and placed a hand to his forehead for a brief moment before turning around and gesturing towards Peter.

"There's a good reason Peter" Ben rebutted "And that reason is that you're becoming something I tried my best to avoid"

"Really?" Peter asked "What's that?"

"You're growing Peter, you're getting stronger as you grow, that's a given" Ben said, stuffing his hands in his pockets and sighing "But just because you're going through a change likes this doesn't entitle you to become so self righteous"

"Self-righteous?" Peter asked in a disgusted tone "I was defending myself!"

"Don't give me that crap Peter" Ben scowled "You weren't provoked by anyone, you found an opportunity to get your revenge and you took it"

"Hey, don't make me sound like some stupid kid Uncle Ben" Peter snapped.

"But that's just it Peter" Ben said, pointing at Peter "You are just a stupid kid, a stupid kid who's gotten so wrapped up in his own comic book revenge plot that he's not thinking about anyone else except himself"

"I don't need to listen to this" Peter growled, pushing himself out of his chair and storming out of the office.

"Peter!" Ben yelled after his nephew, turning around to the principal and talking to them "I'll go get him" Ben quickly followed after Peter who had gone over to his locker and was spinning the combination into the lock of the thin metal door.

"Peter!" Ben called out to him, getting the attention of the other students walking in the hallway.

"Leave me alone Ben" Peter growled, attempting to finish the combination only to miss the last digit and have to start the process again.

"You're not running away from this" Ben said, walking down the hallway towards Peter "You have to act like a man and face up to what you did"

"I just tried manning up Ben, and look where it got me" Peter growled, messing up the second digit this time, grinding his teeth in anger.

"That wasn't manning up Peter, that was more childish than anything" Ben spoke quietly "A real man in that situation would be able to turn the other cheek"

"You know what? I'm sick of hearing that" Peter said, getting progressively louder and louder until he was practically shouting, getting the attention of more people and causing them to crowd around to watch the argument "All my life I've been told to forgive and forget, start from square one, live and learn... but for once in my life I don't have to take their shit any more and I'm not going to!"

"And then what Peter?" Ben asked in an angry tone "You beat the hell out of anyone who says anything wrong... hell, anyone who looks at you wrong and everyone gets scared of you, what do you then?"

"I live my life the way I want to for once!" Peter yelled, losing his temper with the locker as he messed up the combination for a third time. He cocked back his fist and punched the locker door hard enough to knock it from its hinges and deep into the locker itself with a loud metallic slamming noise.

"And how do you wanna live Peter?" Ben demanded, grabbing hold of his nephew's shoulder and turning him around to look at him "As some angry and lonely monster with nobody who cares about him!?"

"I... it's just that I'm sick of being pushed around by everyone... and now that I can finally push back I wanna make sure nobody ever wants to mess around with me again" Peter hissed, anger blazing in his eyes.

"So that's what this is about Peter?" Ben asked "You've gotten power hungry from your growth spurt?" Peter didn't answer, but instead noticed the purple streak of hair followed by a familiar pair of sunglasses move to the front of the crowd as Twilight and Harry arrived.

"Your father used to have a policy when it came to a man in power Peter" Ben snapped "He always used to say that if someone has the ability to make a good choice then they had the moral obligation to do that good" Ben looked at Peter's angry, but confused, eyes and sighed once more before simplifying the quote.

"With great power, comes great responsibility" Ben finished "Your father lived by that code and never strayed from that path" Peter stuffed his hands in his pockets, his eyes beginning to mist at the mention of his father.

"Then where is he?" Peter demanded, his cheeks going red as his voice began to shake.

"What!?" Ben exclaimed "What the hell do you mean by that?"

"Where is he Ben?" Peter demanded, holding his arms out to the sides and shouting loudly in a croaky voice "If he believed in always doing the morally right thing then why isn't he here to tell me, his own son, himself?!"

"Peter, stop being so pathetic already" Ben hissed "You know damn well why your father left and I thought you'd gotten past it already" Peter glared furiously at the ground as a single tear rolled down his cheek before turning around and shoving his way through the crowd that had gathered and sprinting off down the hallway and going into the stairwell.

"Peter!" Ben yelled, taking off after Peter quickly, leaving the others to discuss, sympathise or mock Peter and his plights.


Peter had settled under a breaker box on the underside of the Manhattan train rails and had began to listen to his headphones, allowing his anger to seep out of him slowly as Eminem's Recovery album blared loudly into his eardrums. He held a sandwich in his right hand which he munched on every few minutes as he drummed his foot on the bolted metal, feeling the vibration of the train speeding above him. He reached into his backpack and brought out a bag of diet coke only to find that bottle was just about empty and wasn't enough to quench his thirst.

"Fuck's sake" Peter growled, digging through his bag to see if there was another bottle only to come up empty "Alright, plan B" Peter rummaged around in his backpack's pockets and zips to scrounge together enough money for another drink from a corner store he remembered seeing just a few blocks away, after his escape from school and evading his Uncle Ben. He turned off his music and jumped down from underneath the railway and began to make his way through the city, stopping briefly as a headline in a newspaper caught his eye.

"Drunken Tony Stark crashes iron Man armour into air force test drones" Peter muttered to himself "Wow, what a tool" With a few minutes of walking at a brisk pace Peter found the store and upon entering he was greeted by a very distasteful look from the cashier. Peter walked past him and into the refrigerated aisle. To his dismay he saw that there was a lack of anything in the fridge. The only thing that was left that he would want was a brand he hadn't seen around much but knew that it was one of the biggest energy drinks in England, a brand called Rockstar. He picked the can up with the tip of his finger and flicked it up into the air, catching it in the air with a swipe of his hand. With a proud smirk Peter turned around and walked back down to the cashier where he placed the can on the counter and took out the money he scraped together and placed it on the counter. He looked up at the cashier with an expectant look only to have the cashier glare at him.

"And the rest kid" he snapped.

"What do you mean?" Peter asked "There's a dollar fifty right there"

"The can costs three bucks" he corrected.

"What!?" Peter exclaimed "That's ridiculous, I know this brand ain't that big around here but you can get this stuff for a quid in England, so there's no reason it should cost three times as much!"

"Two reasons kid, one: This ain't England and two: This is my store and I can charge whatever I want for it" he snarled. It was at this point that a man with blonde hair and dark sunglasses walked into the store, looking around as if searching for something before standing in line behind Peter.

"So that'll be four dollars" the cashier said smugly.

"You just said it was three!" Peter snapped angrily.

"I know, and now it's four" he remarked.

"Look pal, I've had a really shitty day today and I need the energy from this drink" Peter sighed, trying to speak more humbly "So could you just do me a favour this once and let it slide?"

"Sorry kid, I missed the part where that's my problem" the cashier sneered "Now, get out of my store if you're not going to buy anything" Peter glared at the cashier furiously before swiping his money off the counter and stuffing it back into his pocket. He stormed out to the doorway just in time to hear a cluttering sound. He turned around to see that the man behind him had swept several items off the counter.

"Really buddy?" the cashier asked angrily, bending down to pick them up again. The man then reached over to the counter and took all of the money out of the register and stuffed it into his pockets. He looked up just in time to see Peter staring at him with a blank expression. The man then picked up the drink and threw it over to Peter with a nod and in response Peter pushed the door open and held it for him, nodding at him with a thank you. The man rushed out of the store and Peter followed slowly afterwards, only to hear the cashier scream for Peter to stop him. Peter ignored the cashier and walked off into the street, where the cashier ran out of the store and began screaming for someone to stop the thief.

"What the hell's the matter with you kid!?" the cashier roared "You let him get away!"

"Sorry" Peter said, using his leftover coke to wash the lid of the can before cracking it open "I missed the part where that's my problem" The cashier growled angrily as Peter turned and began to walk away but Peter froze in place as he heard a familiar yell.

"Hey!" the voice shouted "Stop right there!" Peter whirled around just in time to see his Uncle Ben trying to wrestle a gun away from the thief. Peter froze in place for a brief moment, as the world seemed to slow down when the muzzle of the gun lit up and a loud bang sounded. Peter's eyes locked onto his Uncle's face as he grimaced in pain, grabbing his gut as he was thrown to the floor. Peter threw the drink to the ground as he sprinted across the street, ignoring traffic and pedestrians, skidding the last few yards over to his Uncle as people began to realize what was going on.

"Uncle Ben!?" Peter exclaimed, his body beginning to feel numb.

"P-Peter..." Ben mumbled "Did... did you s-see him?"

"Y-Yeah, I was in the store when he-" Peter muttered, beginning to tear up.

"A-And you didn't... stop him?" Ben asked, his voice beginning to fail him as the blood began to pool around his body. There was a brief look on Ben's face that lasted until he became limp, the last look Peter would ever receive from his Uncle and the look he would remember forever was burned into his brain: Disappointment. He could've stopped the robber, he could've done it easily with his superpowers. And because he didn't... this happened. Peter's mind flashed back to several hours earlier, to the argument he had with his Uncle and what he had said to him.

"With great power" Peter muttered under his breath, standing up straight after closing his Uncle Ben's eyes "Comes great responsibility"


Peter stormed through the streets, looking high and low for the man who had murdered his Uncle, his heart beating with pain and fury and his mind imprinted with nothing but the idea of revenge.

"I'm gonna kill him for this" Peter repeated to himself over and over, psyching himself up for the act he was about to commit. He ran down an alley and came out in front of a small video game store in which he saw his reflection. His mind flashed back to every superhero comic he'd ever read before and even every crime drama.

"I need a mask" Peter snarled "Nobody needs to see my face" He took two more steps forward and looked into the store window, seeing his ticket to a disguise. In the store window was the Watch Dogs Vigilante Edition which, to his great knowledge, contained the hat and ski mask of Aiden Pearce from the game.

"Bingo" Peter said, putting his fist through the window and grabbing hold of the box. When the alarm set off he looked around briefly, and upon seeing how surprisingly empty, he bent his legs and leapt as high as he could before climbing up the rest of the way with his adhesive powers. He sat down on top of the roof and tore open the package, seeing the hat and mask wrapped up in plastic. He took the game out of the package and stared at it for a brief second before scoffing loudly.

"Piece of shit game" he growled, throwing it over his shoulder. He opened the plastic bags and pulled out the hat and mask. He pulled the mask over his head and then pulled it up to cover his mouth and nose before slicking back his hair and putting the hat on, low over his eyes. He stood up straight and cracked his knuckles and neck, tucking the bottom of the mask into his black Ramones shirt and unzipping his black jacket, wearing the perfect clothes for a night-time revenge mission. He looked over the edge of the building and out over the city, hearing screaming from an alley a few blocks away, very faint but still just audible. Peter looked at the distance he had to traverse and groaned loudly. he knew that jumping was going to tire him out and it would take longer. he thought back to the Batman comics where the dark knight would either glide with his cape or would use kind of grappling device to traverse the city..

"Maybe I need something like that" Peter murmured "But something... spidery" With a quick run up he threw himself off the top of the building and down to a lower one, sprinting across the rooftops until he came closer and closer to the location where the scream came from. His ears picked up another muffled scream and he sprang forward leaping into the alley from an adjacent building and crawling along the while quietly.

"Listen to me you little bitch!" he heard a man yell "If you just hand over your purse we can get this over with and be done, just gimme that purse and necklace of yours girl!"

"H-Help... someone!" the young woman screamed. She pulled away from the man for a brief second only to have him pistol whip her around the back of the head. She fell to the ground with a pained scream and the man cocked the gun again.

"I didn't wanna have to do this" he snarled "But I've got no problem in adding another kill to my roster tonight" Peter leapt down to the dark alley and began to walk towards the man, kicking over a trash can as he did so to get his attention. The man whirled around and pointed the gun at Peter, smirking at his get-up.

"Get out of here buddy, this mugging belongs to me" he sniggered, pointing with the gun "Just leave me to shoot this bitch and we can pretend this never happened" Peter balled his fists in fury, enraged by this man's nonchalant attitude towards the murder of innocents.

"Leave her alone-" Peter snarled, his voice slightly muffled by the mask he wore.

"Or what?" the man mocked.

"I'm not finished yet, leave her alone so I don't have to damage her when I tear your fucking throat out" Peter hissed.

"Ooh, we got a big man here haven't we?" the man asked cockily "I think you're forgetting that I've got the gun here, a gun beats a mask any day, punk"

"We'll see" Peter said quietly.

"I'm warning you man, you take one fucking step closer and I'll smear your's and then this bitch's brains all over this alley" he threatened. Peter slowly bent his legs, tensing his muscles to be ready to spring into action. The move he made was so quick that the man barely had the time to register it. Peter stepped forward and kicked the man's gun out of his hand and high into the air, back flipping briefly and catching the gun before hit the ground. Peter then held the gun out at the man, his chest heaving in morbid excitement. The man looked at him with an astonished expression before he put his hands up in surrender.

"Get on the ground" Peter hissed and when the man didn't move he stepped forward and punched him in the face, knocking him straight to the floor "Do what I fucking say!" Peter then turned to the girl and offered her his hand. She looked reluctant for a brief moment but Peter tried to coerce her.

"Trust me, I'm not going to hurt you" he said in a gentle tone "Just get out of here and call the police... actually, forget that, call the coroners" The young woman nodded and took Peter's hand, gently helping her up to her feet before she looked at him.

"T-Thank you" she mumbled.

"No problem" Peter winked, feeling slightly better about what he was about to do now that he'd helped somebody out in the process "Now get out of here" The young woman nodded and ran out of the alley, grabbing her phone out of her purse as she did so. Once she was gone Peter watched for a brief second before his sixth sense began screaming at him. He turned around and dropped into a low crouch as the man swung a large iron pipe at him with a loud yell. Peter dodged the second swing with ease and caught the third one on his arm before head butting the man hard enough to break his nose. Peter grabbed the pipe and slammed it into the side of the man's face, cracking his skull open and smearing the weapon with blood. He threw it to the side and pushed the man up against the wall of the alley, placing the gun to his forehead.

"P-Please" the man begged, beginning to tear up "Don't kill me"

"Why shouldn't I?" Peter asked, stamping on the man's leg and shattering his knee joint. The man screamed in agony before Peter pushed his head back against the wall with the barrel of the gun.

"Answer me!" Peter screamed.

"I got a wife... I got a kid I need to look after man" he sobbed, tears mixing with the blood on his face.

"And you think he didn't!?" Peter roared.

"W-What?" the man asked in confusion. Peter pulled the mask down off his face and stared hard at the man on the floor.

"That man you shot was Ben Parker... that was my Uncle Ben... and now I have to go home and explain to his wife why he's not coming home again-" Peter said, his voice cracking briefly.

"I'm sorry man-" the broken thief whimpered.

"That's not gonna make this any better, you being sorry isn't going to fix this!" Peter yelled, punching him again "That man was everything to me! He was a father to me when I never had one... and you took that all away with one pull of a trigger" Peter lowered the gun and turned around briefly, taking a few paces before looking over his shoulder.

"An eye for an eye... that's fair I suppose" Peter sighed.

"Y-You mean... because I hurt y-you... and now that you've hurt me we're ev-v-en?" he asked, hope blossoming in his eyes.

"No, I now have to grow up without a father-" Peter said, turning around and pointing the gun back at the man "So let's see how well your kid does without theirs"

"No!" the man screamed loudly before Peter pulled the trigger. The crack of the gun seemed louder this time, closer to home and closer to his heart. Peter didn't take his eyes off the man as the bullet flew through his skull, splattering his blood and brains all over the back of the wall. As Peter's eyes looked down at the gun his power trip faded quickly, only to be replaced by a sickening guilt.

"I... what the fuck did I just do?" he demanded of himself. He'd attacked, beaten and murdered a man in cold blood. In the name of what? Closure? Justice? No, Peter had murdered a man in the name of revenge, to make himself feel better. This was his way at fighting back at the unfair nature of fate. And his rebellion had just made him a murderer. There was a bullet buried in the alley wall, a dead body with a hole in its head and a gun with Peter's fingerprints on it. He wanted to be sick, he wanted to cry and he wanted to scream. But instead he knew what he needed to do. It was when he heard the police sirens that he knew what he needed to do. The gun in his hand now had an appointment with the bottom of the Hudson River within the next hour. And Peter now had an appointment with the guilt he had to face, he had to live with the fact that he'd murdered a man.

"B-Best... start now then" Peter said, completely in shock about this whole situation. Peter pulled the mask back up around his face and leapt high into the air before crawling up a wall and disappearing from the location just as the screaming sirens of the police arrived just outside the alley.

City of Lights

"Harry!" Twilight snapped, tackling her boyfriend to the couch and attempting to grab the controller from him "It's my turn now!"

"No it isn't Twi" Harry smirked "I haven't died yet" He managed to keep Twilight at bay with his leg while also keeping hold of the controller and not die.

"You're never going to" Twilight grunted, trying to escape the leg hold Harry had her in "You're too good at the game"

"I am aware of this Twilight, that's why I made the deal that we trade when one of us dies" Harry chuckled "That's one thing I learned from my father, why bother learning the deck and it's tricks when you can just pay off the dealer?" There came a brief knock at the door before it creaked open, Cadance sticking her head in.

"What are you two yelling about?" she asked with a small smile on her face.

"Harry's cheating!" Twilight exclaimed, pointing at her boyfriend as she leaned over the couch. Harry scoffed loudly, slamming his thumb down onto the reload button as he ducked behind cover.

"I'm not cheating" Harry smirked "And what are you, five?" Cadance rolled her eyes, shutting the door and walking over to the wall, leaning against it with her arms folded.

"So, what are we doing now?" Cadance asked.

"I'm waiting for Harry to die so I can have my turn" Twilight glowered.

"You're going to be waiting for a while Twilight, I'm way too good at this game to-" Harry began only to have another player gun him down within seconds, followed by Harry releasing a loud and shrill scream. The two girls looked at the young man in his moment of terror before he quickly regained himself, cleared his throat and growled at the TV.

"I swear to God if I see someone else running around this map with those damn dual-wield Kap 40s I am going to sell my Xbox" he hissed.

"Hey-" Twilight said, taking the controller from him with a smug grin "At least we're not playing Hijacked where everyone just turns the boat into a sniping range" Twilight quickly switched her class to her custom built one which contained an RPG as a primary weapon and a riot shield as her secondary. Harry looked at her with an extremely bemused expression, the look being noticed and briefly questioned.

"What?" Twilight asked with a cocked eyebrow.

"An RPG?" Harry questioned "That is the cheapest thing ever"

"Oh shut up" Twilight said, slapping him on the arm.

"Ewww!" Harry jokingly exclaimed "The touch of a casual!" Twilight rolled her eyes while Cadance chuckled, enjoying the banter between the two teens thoroughly. Twilight rounded a corner in the game and executed her strategy which included throwing a C4 with fast hands equipped only to drop shot with the RPG. Twilight's cocky smile was wiped off her face immediately as the C4 was thrown back and the other player survived the RPG explosion, proceeding to kill her and collect her tags.

"Flak jacket!" the two teens yelled angrily, causing Cadance to jump in surprise.

"That is so cheap!" Twilight glared.

"How do you even dare?" Harry asked before his phone began to ring, the ringtone being the Japanese opening theme for Fairy Tale. Twilight looked at him for a brief second before chuckling.

"Dork" she commented. Harry sneered jokingly at her before checking the caller ID.

"Huh, it's Aunt May" he noted "I wonder what she needs?" Harry walked over to the window and answered the call placing the phone to his ear and speaking.

"Hello?" he asked. He was silent for a few seconds and Twilight turned her attention back to the game, switching her class to something close-range. Out of the corner of her eye however she noticed Harry's face drop a mile.

"What!?" he exclaimed, getting the attention of the two girls.

"I... fuck, where are you now?" Harry asked, his eyes widened in horror "I'll be there as soon as possible" Harry hung up the phone with a quick goodbye and grabbed his jacket off the coat rack by the window.

"Hey, what's happening?" Twilight asked as Harry rushed around the room.

"Peter's Uncle Ben-" Harry muttered "He's been... he's been murdered"

"What?!" Twilight demanded "Where, how!?"

"I don't know, Aunt May is at the police station while they're looking for Peter" Harry explained.

"He's not with her?" Twilight asked.

"No, I'm going to the station to try and talk to her" Harry continued.

"I'm coming too" Twilight announced.

"I'll drive there, Shining took the squad car and left the Beamer here tonight" Cadance added.

"Thanks Cadance" Harry nodded "Shit, I hope Peter's OK"

"Me too" Twilight nodded "Where the hell could he be?"


Peter gripped the edge of the railings as he threw up into the Hudson River, creating a guttural and disgusting sound. After a few seconds the vomit stream ended and he fell back onto the ground, wiping his mouth with his sleeve but feeling no better. The gun he had used to kill, no, murder that man with was now at the bottom of the Hudson River. Peter's hands were freezing cold and he felt sick to his stomach, his conscience dirtied by the death on his hands. The riverside was nearly abandoned that time at night, without even joggers or late night dog walkers. He had removed the hat and mask from his head and stuffed them into the inside pocket of his jacket and had decided that he was going to destroy them when he got home.

"Fuck..." Peter muttered to himself, his mind flashing back to the look he had been given by the man before he murdered him and then to the look Uncle Ben had given before dying. The looks of disappointment and fear had been haunting him for several hours now, replaying in his mind over and over to make sure he never forgot what he had done. As he sat there on the cold ground he replayed the whole scene in his mind, from finding the girl, to attacking the man with the pipe-.

"Oh fuck!" Peter exclaimed, leaping to his feet as he remembered that he had left the pipe behind. It had the blood of the man and his fingerprints on it still.

"I-I need to go back" Peter mumbled, turning around and setting off at a sprint "If I can steal the pipe away from the police then they'll have no way to prove I was there-" Doing as he knew he had to he leaped through the dark city, rooftop to rooftop until he reached the scene of the crime where a forensics crew had been dispatched and were surveying the crime scene.

"No..." Peter hissed under his breath. There was no way now that he would be able to get the pipe back without being spotted. Either they'd found it and it was in the back of their forensics van or even worse, on the way to a forensics lab, or they hadn't found it just yet but were soon going to. Knowing that getting the pipe back was his only way to stay out of jail he had to get it back, by any means necessary. He reached into his jacket pocket, ready to get his disguise back on only to have his eye catch a glimmer of movement across the rooftops. Moving quickly he ducked behind a set of air vents, poking his head out to see the shadowy figure drop down to street level with feline gracefulness.

"The hell?" Peter asked himself. The figure moved quickly into the light for only a second, illuminating a slender feminine figure dressed in a black outfit with flowing, white hair. She pressed herself up against the forensics van, looking inside it for something to steal presumably. Peter slowly lowered himself into a prone position and crawled to the edge of the rooftop to get a better view of what was happening. The woman reached inside the van and pulled out a grey pipe with a large blood splotch on it. Peter's eyes widened in shock as she removed a small piece of equipment from her belt and clicked a button.

A beam of light began to shine from the bar, somehow wiping the blood away from the weapon without ever touching it.

"What is she doing?" Peter muttered. The woman then took two more small, round objects from her belt and held each one in either hand.

"Hey!" an angry voice yelled from inside the alley. Both Peter and the strange woman turned to look at the voice, realizing that it was one of the forensics team who had now alerted the others in the alley.

"What are you doing?" he demanded.

"Sorry boys, nothing personal" she chuckled in a very playful tone "Just business" With that she thumbed down two buttons on either ball, throwing one down the alley and another into the back of the forensics van before leaping away. Peter's eyes leaped onto the forensics van and then back to the forensics officer before his sixth sense flared up wildly.

"Shit!" Peter roared, throwing himself backwards off the roof as the two spheres detonated into equally massive explosions. Peter slapped his hand to the wall as he tumbled off the back of it, hearing the sounds of glass shattering and rubble flying everywhere as the explosions destroyed the alleyway and the several buildings surrounding it. Peter jumped back into the street and barely managed to dodge the falling rubble as it slammed into the ground where he had been seconds earlier. As the explosions died down the silence became very strong once more, giving Peter time to think.

"The officers..." he panted "They're all dead..." Another wave of guilt washed over Peter as he realized that while he had been standing around gawking he could've done something to intervene, he could've stopped the woman or he could've saved their lives. Now there were over five people dead because of him, through action or inaction, families had been ruined and lives had been destroyed because he had failed. As the sound of sirens entered his hearing range he once again fled the scene of the crime, his crime hidden but the guilt still with him.


Harry rushed through the precinct, Twilight close behind him, before seeing May sat in a chair sobbing her eyes out, a box of tissues on a table next to her and a female officer sat across from her with a sympathetic look on her face. The officer noticed Harry first and she stood up with her hand extended.

"Sir I'm afraid I'm gonna have to ask you to leave" she said calmly.

"My name's Harry Osborne" Harry said quickly "I'm a friend of Mrs Parker's family" May seemed to notice Harry and she looked up at him with bloodshot eyes.

"Harry, have you seen Peter yet?" she asked in a heartbroken tone.

"No Aunt May, I haven't" Harry sighed "The last time I saw him was at school today"

"Oh, where he could be?" May asked, placing her face back into her hands and sobbing. Harry placed a hand to his head and screwed his eyes shut, thinking of everywhere and anywhere Peter could be at that point. All the places they used to hang out at as kids, places Peter mentioned he'd liked, anywhere that he might think to go. Harry's phone went off in his pocket and on a glimmer of hope he grabbed it out of his pocket and checked the caller ID.

"Peter?" Harry asked as he answered the phone "Where the hell are you man?" Everyone in the room looked at Harry at this point and he quickly turned his phone onto loudspeaker.

"I-I'm around" Peter muttered from the other end of the phone.

"Peter, we're all worried sick about you" Harry said shakily "We're at the police station with your Aunt May, your Uncle Ben's been-"

"Murdered... yeah I know" Peter said, cutting him off in a tone that made him sound as if he were on the edge of tears.

"You know?" Harry asked in a shocked tone "How do you know?"

"I was... I was there" Peter answered "It's my fault"

"Peter!" May shouted from her seat "It's not your fault, just tell us where you are and-"

"Aunt May it is my fault!" Peter yelled, his voice breaking on the last word "I was there when he got shot, I could've stopped the guy and I didn't!"

"Hey, slow down Peter, just tell us what happened" Harry said slowly, trying to comfort his friend.

"When I ran out of school today, Uncle Ben came looking for me. I went into a store to get a drink and got into an argument with the cashier-" Peter explained, trying to keep his voice steady enough to talk "When I left some guy robbed the money out of the register and threw me the drink I couldn't afford. I wanted to get back at the cashier for acting the way he did so I held the door open for the guy and didn't try to stop him" Harry grimaced painfully while Twilight put a hand to her mouth in shock as Peter explained what had happened. They could hear Peter weeping softly on the other end of the phone for several seconds before Harry spoke up.

"What happened then?" Harry asked.

"The cashier noticed what happened and ran out after the guy, screaming for someone to help-" Peter continued "And when I turned around I heard Uncle Ben shout... and I heard a gunshot...-" Peter's voice trailed off as he began to sob again. Harry looked over to May who had now stood up and was walking towards the phone.

"Listen to me young man, I know you may feel like this is your fault but listen to me when I say this, there's nothing you could have done" May said, tears streaming down her face "You did the right thing by not getting involved"

"How can you say that?!" Peter roared "Uncle Ben is dead because of me, I let that guy go and he shot Uncle Ben... I could've stopped it from happening"

"No you couldn't Peter, if you had tried to do anything he would've shot you too" May snapped "Is that what you wanted to happen?"

"No!" Peter sobbed "I... I just-"

"Peter, listen to me. I know you feel like this is all your fault but blaming yourself isn't going to fix this, it's only going to make it worse" May said in a softer tone "You're angry right now, and you're lashing out at whatever you can. What you need to do is come down to the police station and give a witness statement about what you saw and then we can let the police deal with this, I know it's hard but it's the right thing to do" Peter sobbed for several long seconds before taking a deep breath and clearing his throat.

"OK" he muttered "I'm on my way now"


May threw her arms around her nephew as the two of them began to sob together. Harry clapped his friend on the back while Twilight and Cadance merely stood back, both of them mist-eyed as they looked at the family.

"I'm sorry Aunt May" Peter murmured.

"Don't be-" May sighed "You couldn't have done anything" Peter stepped back from his Aunt and looked at her in the eyes, wishing that he could tell her about what had happened but he knew that the last thing she needed was for her only remaining family member to go to jail on murder charges. At this moment a police officer walked over to Peter and placed a hand on his shoulder.

"Son-" he asked in a deep voice "Do you think you're ready to give a statement now?"

"Yeah, I think so" Peter nodded. There was a moment of silence before the door swung open and Shining stormed into the room with a phone in his left hand and a case file in his right.

"I am aware of that Mack" Shining growled "The attacked, whoever it was, took down a whole forensics team and two of our own" Shining slammed the case file onto the table, waving at his wife before furrowing his brow in confusion as to why his sister was there. A photo slid out from the case file, a photo of the man that had shot Peter's Uncle hours earlier. Peter picked up the photo with shaky hands as a tear slid down his cheek.

"Son?" the police officer asked, Shining hanging up the phone and looking at Peter "You alright?"

"That's him" Peter announced "That's the guy that shot Uncle Ben" Shining gently took the photo from Peter and handed it to his co-worker.

"Then you'll be happy to hear that he's dead" Shining sighed "We found what was left of him and one of our teams in an alley earlier tonight after someone had blown the place to pieces"

"What are you talking about?" Peter asked, faking to not know what was going on.

"Well, our theory is that this guy had connections to this city's invisible crime lord, and once he got picked off by someone tonight, that same crime lord sent in a clean-up crew to destroy the evidence and anyone else who was near it at the time" Shining said.

"Why would they do that?" Cadance asked, speaking after having been quiet for so long.

"A cover up" Shining answered "Whoever this guy was the crime lord wanted his trail to go dead"

"He didn't do a very good job of it" Peter said, wiping his eyes "He's now got a lot more heat on him than if he'd just let this run it's course"

"Exactly" Shining nodded, snapping his fingers loudly "It doesn't fit what he usually does, why d'you think he did that?"

"Bait?" Peter asked, glad his mind was being taken off the current situation with a little bit of critical thinking.

"Exactly" Shining nodded "I think our crime lord expected someone to be there and he then sent in his clean-up crew in to execute with extreme prejudice"

"Who's he going after though?" Twilight asked.

"I think he's gunning for someone he wants out of the picture" Shining explained "I think he expected me to be there"


"So what are we gonna do Boss?" a thick Manhattan accent asked.

"What we're going to do is we're going to get that little thief off this job and instead bring in someone else we can trust to perform the job... efficiently" a deep, powerful voice stated calmly.

"And who's that gonna be?" the other man asked.

"Do we still know the whereabouts of that Mr Marco?" the deep-voiced man asked.

"Flint?" the accent asked "Yeah, lives in Soho last time I checked, he gonna do the cop in?"

"No, no, I don't want Armour dead, I just want him to stay out of the picture, the thief was supposed to send a warning, not attempt to kill the fair Captain" the man continued "We're going to be more subtle with our friend Marco here"

"Ahhh, we gonna send him after Armour?"

"No, we're going to deal a more crushing blow to Mr Armour" the boss said "We're going to send him after his wife"

The Road to Redemption

Peter sat on his bed with his elbows resting on his knees. The last of the daylight was fading away outside his window and he was already tired from the events that had taken up his day. Today was the day of his Uncle Ben's funeral, the day he felt that never would've happened if he hadn't made a mistake. He wished with all his might that he could just sit here in his room with his aunt and uncle muttering angrily downstairs about how irresponsible he'd been acting lately and that they still needed to decide his punishment. He had taken the jacket of the suit he'd worn to the funeral off and it remained in a pile of clothes on the floor, having missed his laundry basket upon his numerous throws. He pushed himself up off his bed and walked over to his drawers, sliding the top one open. The older wooden draw creaked under its own weight as it hung open, small flakes of wood dust falling down to the carpet below due to the scraping metal railings on the drawer itself.

"Peter?" May asked, knocking on the door of his room.

"Yeah?" Peter asked, going through his drawer until he came across a Batman comic book. He slid it out of the drawer just as Aunt May opened the door and walked inside, looking around for a mess as she often did when entering his room.

"I just checked my emails-" she began, sitting down in Peter's computer chair as he sat down on his bed "And I'd gotten one from school, in regards to the fight you had a few days ago"

"And?" Peter asked, looking up at his aunt.

"You've been suspended" she answered, lowering her eyes slightly.

"What!?" Peter demanded, sitting up straight on the edge of his bed "For how long!?"

"Six months" May sighed, placing her hand on her forehead.

"That's can't be right" Peter growled "I didn't even start that fight!"

"Peter, I don't think you understand how serious this is" May cut in "This isn't anything like the scuffles you were usually in a few years ago, whether you started it or not you shattered that boy's hand and hospitalized him, you could be facing charges of assault"

"It was self defence!" Peter snapped.

"Peter, there's no point in shouting at me about this" May said calmly "I agree with you, but I don't approve of how you handled it"

"What d'you mean by that?" Peter asked in confusion.

"I know that you didn't start that fight, the teachers managed to figure that out from the students and Harry too, but you went too far with how you handled it... you might've ruined that poor boy's school career"

"That's not my pr-" Peter began before cutting himself off before the last word left his mouth. He put a hand to his face and rubbed his temples, sighing through his nose.

"You're right... I might've ruined Flash's football career" Peter nodded solemnly "Do you think I should apologize to him?" May looked up at the clock on Peter's wall for a long second before answering in a slow tone.

"No, I don't think you should" she said.

"What?" Peter blinked, thoroughly confused at his aunt's statement.

"Do you feel like you were in the wrong?" May asked.

"N-No" Peter answered after a moment's hesitation.

"And do you feel like an apology is going to make things better between you and Flash?" she continued.

"No, not really" Peter said with a shake of his head.

"So if you don't feel sorry and it's not going to help then what good is apologizing?" May asked with a raised eyebrow. Peter stared blankly at her for a long moment before opening his mouth and speaking.

"As much as I agree with you that is a terrible moral standard to have" Peter said in a confused tone.

"Peter, I think you're too old for me to sugar coat the world for you now" May responded "You need to start learning that the world doesn't play fair and there are many things you can't solve with a handshake, this is one of them"

"Right... if these are the kind of lessons I'm going to learn at fifteen then I think I'm just gonna hide under my covers until I'm forty three now" Peter said jokingly.

"Life's going to be more difficult for us now Peter... and you're gonna have to be the man of the house now-" May said, standing up and walking back towards the door "You're gonna need to take on a few responsibilities" Peter smiled at his aunt with a brief nod before speaking.

"I know that, and, don't worry, I will Aunt May" Peter smirked.

"Good... in that case you can start by doing your laundry right now" May nodded, knocking her hand gently on the door frame.

"What"? Peter asked in a laughing tone "I've gotta get to bed, it's a school..." May smirked at him as he trailed off, hanging his head and nodding. He pushed himself off his bed and gathered up the piles of clothes he had littered around the room.

"Right, responsibility" Peter said, practically buried in his clothing. May moved out of the way as Peter stumbled past her and down towards the stairs.

"Be careful" May warned as she walked into the bathroom, closing the door behind her.

"I will" Peter said, checking behind him to see that his aunt had fully shut the door before vaulting over the staircase and dropping down to the floor, bending a knee as he landed to soften the drop, though unneeded. He pushed up and strode into the kitchen, throwing the clothing in front of the washing machine before grabbing the TV remote of the table and flicking on the small TV they had on the kitchen side. The automatic channel was the news network and it was playing a report by a relatively new anchor to the channel.

"And reports are still coming in from what appears to be an underground crime wave in the city of New York and the NYPD are encouraging anyone they can to come forward with anything they may know about any suspicious activity in the city" he anchor said Though while they encourage the reporting of crimes they are also warning citizens to not attempt to intervene in any of these events, saying that the crime wave needs to be dealt with by those trained to handle this responsibility" Peter listeend to the report as he began to pile clothes into the washing machine, muttering to himself.

"Handle the responsibility?" he asked himself "These guys can barely handle a street protest, I could do a better job of protecting this city than the NYPD" Peter's hand fell off the dial on the washing machine as a thought struck him. When it came to protecting the city, he felt like he genuinely could. He wasn't like one of those regular nut balls who thought they could fight crime by running round with a stick and an eye mask. They often failed to realize just how dangerous fighting crime was and were focused only on the comic tales of super villains and devious plots, forgetting about the drug dealers, murderers and rapists that swarmed the streets of the big cities.

"What am I saying?" Peter asked himself "Am I really talking about dressing up in costume and beating up criminals?" The question seemed ridiculous to Peter for the first three seconds but the more he thought about it the more he liked the idea. He knew he could do it, he'd stopped a mugging and a murder previously and it hadn't been that difficult. He had somewhat of a costume put together already and he was more than well equipped with the ability to take on a few criminals with his super powers.

"This is extremely stupid" Peter grinned, drumming his fingers on the top of the machine "But fuck it, I'm really interested in this now" He finished up with the washing machine's set up before sprinting back up the stairs and getting on his computer, grabbing a sketch book to begin throwing some ideas together.

The Human Spider?

Peter sat cross legged on the floor, surrounded by crumpled up scraps of paper with failed costume designs, name ideas and several different variations of costumes, including capes, claws and different kinds of masks. Originally he had decided on a Batman-esque black suit with a flowing cape and spikes on the arms before deciding that it wasn't who he was. He moved on from the concept of fear-inciting pieces of body armour and onto bright, hope-inspiring costumes. The fact he hadn't thought of a precise design did not halt the fact he had a theme. The theme was spiders, he hadn't decided on a specific type of spider nor a colour but he knew it had to be cool. And with the idea of a spider, even a human one, he knew that it'd have its own webbing. So having decided to set the costume design aside for now he began to look into how he would go about equipping himself with webbing.

"Hmmm..." Peter hummed, flicking a pencil around in his hand as he thought, the track Survival from the Marshall Mathers LP 2 blaring through his speakers, "I know they need to be wrist mounted but should they be mounted on the over or underarm?" After making a quick sketch of both of these designs he circled the underarm design due to the ability to activate them easily through an undecided gesture. He figured using a simple hand clenching gesture would be a good enough idea at first before realizing that every time he balled a fist he would activate the mechanism.

"Right, so it needs to be a more precise hand movement and I need to do something to prevent it from activating when I punch someone" Peter said, picking up the several sketches he had made of spiders to try and inspire a costume and examining them. The one that caught his attention was the sketch of a spider in an aggressive stance with its front two legs curled up above its head and its fangs angled downwards. Peter studied the sketch for a long moment before he looked down at his hand and curling his middle and ring fingers whilst extending his first and little finger.

"Yeah... yeah, that could definitely work" Peter nodded, extending his thumb outwards as a way to not block the area he would place the device "And to stop it from firing when I don't want it to I could add in a mechanism to make sure I have to... double press it, or something like that?" Peter returned to his sketches of the web device, still lacking a name at that time, and created a few annotations on the side. The design he had come up with so far was a metallic cuff fitted with a cartridge system with a pressurized liquid inside the cartridge that would fire when he pressed a small button on the end of a small, thin metal spring fitted onto a hinge, as to follow the movement of his hand, that would release a cap on the cartridge and cause it to be shot due to the pressure inside the cartridge.

"Right, blueprints and designs are as good as any but the problem is going to be creating this stuff" Peter sighed, rubbing his eyes with his hand "I don't think it exists and if I remember correctly there is no way in hell I could afford to order it if it did exists" Knowing what he knew about naturally created spider webs there was no way in hell he was going to reproduce that kind of material, fit it into a pressurized cartridge and have it be strong enough to bind his enemies in a fight.

"Wait..." Peter murmured, an idea blossoming in his mind. He was aware that spiders did indeed use their webbing to bind and capture their prey but they also used it to lower themselves from heights and to help build their webs.

"So, if they can hang from their webbing, why can't I?" Peter asked "Better yet, if I can hang from them then I can swing from them too. I can use it to get around the city quickly as well as using it as a weapon" Peter then scavenged quickly through his papers in order to find the costume designs he had put together and found one that he knew would have to work in tandem with the web-swinging idea. The suit design he had decided on was a thin, skin-tight piece of clothing with a complete mask and eye-holes. Having a rush of inspiration of design brought on by his decision to add webbing to his skill tree he began to scribble down web designs alongside the image before deciding on a pattern he liked, especially on the mask. He added the webbing to the nearly plain suit before his eye caught another sketch of a spider he'd done, this time in a much more cartoony style. The eyes of that particular spider were less eye-like and much larger with a slanted appearance and being blood red. Without adding the colour he drew on the large, slanted eye designs to the suit and picked up his page filled with drawings of different symbols. His final choice was a large, long-legged black spider with a bulky, angular body and small, barely visible fangs.

"Perfect" Peter grinned, finishing the sketch of his prototype suit and feeling a warmth glow in his stomach "Now all it needs is colour and it'll be perfect" He wanted something that was eye-catching to finalize the design, something that could be inspiring to the people but could also represent danger in the animal kingdom. He knew that the brighter the colours on an insect or animal in the jungle the more poisonous they were and this was something he wanted to translate over to his suit. What suggested danger? Red.

"Hang on" Peter said before he coloured the entire suit in red "It needs something else... blue maybe?" He grabbed another blue pencil from the box next to him and began to colour in the red parts, making the colour percentage on the fly, before completing it with the blue pencilling. With a wide a smile he held the drawing up to the light, marvelling at his own handiwork before a thought struck him.

"Name" he mumbled "I'm gonna need a superhero name..., something easy to remember, like... the Human Spider?" Peter rolled the name over his tongue several times before shaking his head.

"No, that sounds really dumb" he scoffed "I'll think of one later, right now I need to figure out what I'm gonna need to make this web fluid stuff"

Arachna-Man?

With a flick of his wrist and a swift tapping of his fingers Peter activated the newly christened web-shooters and the seventeenth attempt of a web fluid formula was blasted out in a sputtering, watery mess that flew two feet before landing in a white puddle on the floor.

"Oh for fuck's sake" Peter growled, hitting a button on the inner wrist of the web-shooters that ejected the cartridges. He had been working on the web fluid formula for several days now and the supplies he'd liberated from the Manhattan High's science store room were beginning to run out. He figured he had less than two more attempts at this before he'd have to go on another revolutionary war against another tyrannical science closet in order to get more chemicals to mix. Being close to scrapping the whole idea of webbing entirely he disposed of the aluminium cartridges he had fashioned in a make-shift incinerator. They exploded with a brief pop before the contents burned away to nothing.

"How the fuck am I gonna get this to work now?" Peter sighed, sitting down on a stool with a notebook in his hand, reading through his formulae and trying to work out the problems "Either the liquid remains as just a liquid or it solidifies into a pipe that doesn't stick to anything... Christ Parker, you're supposed to be smarter than this" Peter's defeatist attitude had him sow rapped up in self-pity that he almost didn't notice his phone vibrating in his pocket.l Upon feeling the buzzing next to his leg he took his phone out and checked the caller I.D.

"Twilight?" he asked himself "I wonder what she needs..." He accepted the call and put the phone to his ear, hearing Twilight's friendly greeting.

"Hey Peter, how're you holding up?" she asked softly.

"I'm good thanks Twilight, what about you?" Peter responded.

"I'm doing great, I'm out shopping with Harry and we were thinking of picking you something up as a present" she said. Peter could faintly hear Harry on the other end of the call, using the usual persona he did when he had been dragged shopping.

"Peter, help me, I'm losing the will to live right now" he heard Harry call.

"Behave will you Harry, people are staring at us" Twilight scolded.

"As they should, a man as beautiful as myself deserves attention" Harry said in a faux-snooty tone.

"And here I thought they were attracted to me and my gorgeous rear" Twilight snickered.

"Girl please, if anybody's got the killer ass here it has to be me" Harry said. Peter chuckled as he heard a faint smacking sound, presumably as Harry patted himself on the rear to emphasise his mock point.

"Right" Twilight sniggered before returning to the conversation "Do you want us to get you anything while we're here?"

"Yeah, he wants to get me a taxi back home" Harry called.

Shush" Twilight said scornfully "Or you're going on the naughty step when we get home"

"You can't make me... you're not my Mom" Harry said in a pouting tone.

"You're right, I'm not your Mom" Twilight agreed "I can hit you, she can't. Now are you gonna behave yourself from now on?"

"Yes Ma'am" Harry moped.

"Good boy, now, what did you say Peter?" Twilight asked.

"I said I'm good thanks... but can I ask you a quick science question?" Peter asked, looking down at the web-shooter on his arm.

"Sure, what for?" Twilight asked.

"It's for a science competition online" Peter lied "It wants me to write an essay detailing the best way to make a synthetic material that's adhesive and extremely durable that can be stored in a liquid form that solidifies on exposure to air... any ideas?" Twilight was quiet for a long moment before she began to speak.

"If you ask me I think they're thinking about this the wrong way" Twilight asked "I'd do it the other way around" Peter blinked blankly for a moment, confused as to what Twilight was getting at.

"Le what?" Peter asked in confusion.

What I mean is they're asking for a liquid that turns to a solid when exposed to air, I'd do it the other way around by making a solid that turns into a liquid" Twilight explained. Peter nodded slowly as she spoke, beginning to grasp her meaning.

"You mean something that turns a solid into a liquid-" Peter began before realizing that it had to be cartridge-based "Oh, it also says that it needs to be able to fit into a small area, like, compressed"

"So then we need to think of something that can change the thickness of that solid's liquid form..." Twilight added "Nothing springs to mind just yet..."

"I've got it!" Peter said, clicking his fingers in a eureka moment "Shear thinning!" Twilight was silent for a second before she made an affirmative grunting sound.

"If I can shear thin the liquid state then I can change the viscosity so that it can be compressed down to an extremely compact state-" Peter said, scribbling the idea down on the notebook before the idea escaped him "And then I can add in an extra compound or two that'll make the liquid revert back to its solid state when its exposed to air again!"

"Wait, I thought you said this was for a science quiz, when will you be doing this?" Twilight asked in a puzzled tone.

"Speaking figuratively, sorry Twilight" Peter said, trying to cover his tracks quickly "Thanks Twilight, you're a genius!"

"Um... you're welcome?" she said quizzically "You're not gonna win anything if you answer this question correctly are you... and I thought we figured out an alternative version of the question, I never helped you answer the actual one-"

"Talk to you guys later, bye!" Peter said. With that he hung up the phone and stuffed it back into his pocket, jumping up about of the chair he was in and rushing back over to the desk he was working on, taking the different chemicals he had been using and emptying the testing apparatus he'd used, preparing to start working from a whole new angle.

"Get ready New York, the Arachna-Man will be on the job soon enough!" Peter exclaimed before realizing what name he had just used "Wow... that one sucked even more than the first name I thought of, holy shit I'm bad at this"

Maybe Spider-Man... yeah, Spider-Man.

Several days went by as Peter tweaked, tinkered and perfected the formula for the web fluid and after several tests he felt that it was as perfect as it could be. The final formula he'd settled with was a poly-fibre that was able to be compressed and and stretched much farther than thought with only a limited amount of fluid used, this making it perfect for a long-lasting while limited amount of web fluid cartridge. The substance was extremely flexible but also had incredible durability, this being shown from the fact he had used it to web a neighbour's car to a wall and have it withstand the pulling power of a V8 Maserati engine. The problem with the tests he had done was that, even though they had proven flexibility, durability and adhesiveness, they hadn't had their abilities tested under extreme stress. And it was the final test Peter was on his way to performing as he thought of the properties of his web fluid, feeling a dull throb of anxiety in his stomach as he made his way to the testing grounds. Peter had added a pair of faux-leather gloves to his makeshift vigilante costume to prevent tearing his skin and leaving fingerprints behind despite the fact that within a few days his new superhero suit would be finished and wearable.

"Still, I feel kinda bad for liberating all of this stuff from these people, they paid good money for it and I just swooped in and snatched it all" Peter mumbled to himself as he subconsciously used his powers to scale the wall of the building he was on "Saying that, I had to make a pretty big sacrifice to wear that modified ski suit"

"With people who do are involved in professional skiing or bicycle racing they are often aware of the problems that come with having hair, especially if that person is male" the man speaking in the online lecture said "The problem that they face with their hair is that it often creates drag in places that, while small, can create just enough air resistance to add a second or two onto that racer's time and a second can mean the difference between a win and a loss. The way that most people combat these issues is by doing things like wearing streamlined clothing that can compress leg hair easily and a helmet of hat that presses down the head hair too. But a major problem that is hard to suppress comes from the existence of pubic hair, and those curly and thick locks of annoyance are extremely hard to press down even in a skin-tight suit and so this brings us to the solution to getting rid of air resistance caused by unruly pubic hair: shaving and or waxing my friends"

"Ugh" Peter said, shivering uncomfortably as he scaled the wall "I'm gonna need a new set of razor blades just to keep the undercarriage in check now" He ducked his head down just as a bird flew out of a nest that it had made in a loose brick on the wall and for the first time Peter looked down to the street hundreds of feet below him. A sense of vertigo came over him and then a sense of dread as he remembered how he was going to get off this building in order to test the web-shooters and the webbing's strength.

"Holy shit" Peter grimaced, climbing higher and higher, having almost reached the halfway point of the Oscorp Tower "I really hope nobody's up here right now" Peter had to manually remind himself to breathe as his fear had him by the throat right now and every iota of his mind told him that this was a terrible idea that was going to get him killed. But on the other hand, if this worked then he would have broken new ground in the scientific community because if the web fluid worked, and counting on no one else having it patented, then he would be an inventor that would never go down in history as he would have to tell everyone he made it, then they would find out who he was when he started fighting crime and then the bad things would happen.

"It is starting to get really cold up here now" Peter said, his teeth beginning to chatter softly "I can't wait to get down" After a steady five more minutes of climbing he reached the top of the building, flipping himself over the edge and landing on his feet. He checked the heli-pad landing zone for anyone else before confirming it was clear. He walked over to the large H in the middle of the roof and looked up at the last stretch of his climb: a thirty five foot tall extra set of floors that had the building's penthouse inside of it where Norman Osborn conducted business deals Peter guessed. With a quick sprint, a jump and a few seconds of wall-running he was up on top of the tallest building in New York city, seeing flocks of birds flying lower than him and the vehicles appearing as nothing more than ants beneath him.

And his plan was to jump off the edge of it.

Peter fastened his web-shooters onto his wrists and locked them into place, loading a fresh pair of cartridges from a bag he'd brought with him with a change of clothing and extra cartridges. With a deep breath he walked over to the edge of the rooftop and looked down at the city below. The feeling of vertigo punched him in the face and he stumbled back with a terrified laugh, feeling his heart rate jump to panic attack levels of fast as his hands began to tremble.

"Well Parker..." Peter whispered to himself "This is the moment you either end up as a pioneer of science or you end up as a bloody pile on the side walk... for science" Peter stood still for a long second as he decided the best was to go about this. He could either jump as high as he could before starting the free fall or he could hang off and then drop like you did when you were too scared to jump off the high diving board. He could simply sprint of the edge and fall or he could just lean forwards until gravity took over. He thought for a long minute before coming to a decision. He was going to go with the last option he thought of and decided that he wasn't going to hesitate.

"Here we go" Peter mumbled as he stepped up to the edge, the tips of his shoes just extending over the rooftop "Do or die Parker" And with that last statement he leaned forward. There was no build up, no dramatic countdown or cool phrase. He knew that if he prepared himself to drop he never would so he decided to try and trick his own mind into feeling no fear of the fall. Of course it didn't work and the second he went over the edge he felt an immediate pang of regret.

"Oh fuck-" Peter gasped as he angled downwards into a free fall that he was too far away from the wall to abort. The wind immediately blasted his hat off, throwing it away from him before he even attempted to catch it. The wind roared through his hair and stung his eyes, deafening him to a degree that he could no longer hear, only feel the wind and his pounding heart. He looked into the reflection of the glass panes he blasted past, feeling a strange serene feeling overcome him as he saw his own body, arms extended out like the wings of an angel, flying down to earth. But he knew there and then that he was no angel, he was something better. He was both an arachnid and a Homosapien. he looked at the reflection and grinned widely.

"I'm a Spider-Man" Peter thought, his eyes locking onto the pavement only a few hundred feet below him. He tucked his body together, flipped forward and using his sixth sense he aimed his right web-shooter for a building in front of him. His heart in his mouth he double tapped the trigger and a strand of white fluid shot out of the nozzle on the shooter. It quickly solidified, stuck and as he hit the lowest point of his swing the web tensed, stretched and... and... held. There was an elastic whipping noise as the web allowed Peter to swing forward, bringing him back up from the death sentence he had almost inflicted on himself. He swung high up into the air and released the web, sailing up and forward before beginning to drop again. He shot another web, releasing this one before it brought him straight up again, maximising his distance. He flew forward above the heads and hoods of the amazed crowd beneath him. Another web, he was beginning to pick up speed now as the action become more comfortable. Another web, a whoop of exhilaration escaped his lips as he cheated death repeatedly, swinging faster and faster. Another web and he was around a corner. Another web that was followed by an acrobatic flip. Yet another web that he used his momentum to fling himself forward even further than a regular swing. And a final web to soften his landing on a water tower, bending his knees and panting excitedly as he returned to the earth like the rest of the people.

"Holy fuck..." Peter laughed, checking the web-shooters for any sign of damage or stress "That was incredible!" Peter looked down over the water tower at the people on the streets, some walking, others on bikes and a few on skateboards. It had worked! The web fluid was a complete success and he was one step closer to being a superhero to the people below him.

"What did I say I was, a Spider-Man?" Peter asked himself "No, not a Spider-Man... I'm the Spider-Man"

Damages Done

Shining sat at his desk, twirling a pencil around in his grasp. His office light's had been lowered to a low hue of light in an attempt to ease his headache brought on by hours of critical thinking and a caffeine crash he'd recently endured. The piles of papers on his desk stacked high into a small mountain, filled with crime scene reports, post mortem examination faxes and witness statements. Shining's anger had been steadily building over the past few weeks as he'd been ruthlessly hunting the city's infamous mob boss with no results. Every time he'd had a witness willing to come forward they either shut up or found dead in their apartment the next week, no evidence could be lifted from the crime scenes they'd examined and none of the thugs they'd arrested were even willing to admit they'd heard of a mob boss in the city. The stranglehold this guy had on the city was beginning to anger the once unstoppable crime gangs, the Vercetti's from Little Italy had been running the murder and weapons trade since they'd imported their business from Sicily after the end of the Second World War, the Harlem Viceroys had been completely shut out of the heroin trade by the newcomer that had conquered the city and even Battery City's Mexican immigrant gang had their business of cocaine and methadone, their eco-friendly version of heroin they'd been selling to try and contend with the Viceroys. In a way, Shining almost felt sorry for these guys as they'd had their decades of business and success yanked from out underneath them in a matter of years. He'd heard about the rise of this new crime lord when he was around eighteen years old before getting into the police academy. By the time he'd graduated this newcomer was a kingpin, running every thug worth a damn and killing off those who didn't work for him.

"This is getting out of hand" Shining muttered to himself, rubbing his temple with the tips of his fingers and exhaling slowly "I need to find something on this fucker before I end up getting picked off like everyone else" He'd thought about the danger working this case would bring on his family. He knew that someone could end up getting seriously hurt or that he could end up getting murdered in a drive-by while eating lunch with Cadance. He'd lay awake at night while his beautiful wife held him close, whispering to him that everything was going to be alright, that he was going to find this crime lord and put him away within the year. That was when they'd gotten married and just come back from their amazing honeymoon. That was when the both of them were twenty one years old. They were getting close to twenty six now, nearly five years of late nights and failed police raids.

"Ugh... I need some coffee" Shining sighed, pushing himself out of his desk and setting the pencil down on the desk. He walked out into the hall, stuffing his hands into his silver pant pockets, staring at his black wing-tip shoes with his fringe falling over his eyes. Before he'd started this case, when he'd first been promoted to Captain, he'd always have his white shirt clean and pressed, tucked into his black pants with a belt fastened securely around them, a matching suit jacket with a dark blue tie. The tie was his wife's idea to match his hair and his eyes, and having married a fashion designer he had no stance to argue with her and had simply gone along with it after she had given him the look. The look consisted of her placing a hand on her cocked hips, tilting her head to the side and raising both of her eyebrows whilst pursing her lips.

"Man, how the hell did I manage to land such a perfect wife?" Shining asked himself, slotting a few coins into the coffee machine and sliding the cup under the dispenser.

"I wouldn't call it trial and error son, I'd say luck" a deep, bassy voice chuckled. Shining turned his head to see his superior, a dark-skinned, large man with a thick moustache by the name of Marcus Glover.

"Commissioner, good evening sir" Shining said with a smile. He grabbed his coffee and moved to the side to let his official-superior but unofficial-friend purchase his own coffee.

"You too kid, how is the wife doing now anyway?" Glover asked.

"Great thanks sir" Shining nodded, sipping his coffee.

"And the rest of the family?" he asked, pouring an unhealthy amount of sugar into his cup.

"Just moved from Chicago into New York, Mom, Dad and Twilight too" Shining grinned.

"Good, good, I haven't seen Twilight since you and your folks brought her into the station for your induction" Glover commented "How is she?"

"She's great too, landed herself her first boyfriend now" Shining said, a bitter tone in his voice. Glover smiled at the young man, noticing the change in his posture at the mention of Twilight's new lover.

"And I'm guessing that big brother doesn't like the thought of some stranger in his little sister's bed?" he asked.

"Sir, she's only fifteen and only been dating him for a few weeks" Shining said, at first with confidence before seemingly second guessing himself "At least I hope not, I'll kill the fucker if he touches my sister like that"

"Who is the walking target by the way?" Glover queried, stirring the coffee with a wooden spoon.

"Harry Osborn" Shining answered before running a hand through his thick hair "Nah, he's a decent kid and he's got a good head on his shoulders... I think I trust him with Twilight"

"Harry Osborn?" Glover said in a surprised tone "That's quite an achievement for a first boyfriend, Twilight plays her cards right and she'll never have to work a day in her life" The two of them chuckled at the joke before Shining shook his head.

"I don't think so, Twilight wasn't raised to be a gold digger, and besides, she could make her own millions with her mind alone" Shining added.

"Yeah, she was quite the science whiz the last time we talked, explained to fully grown men why a gun goes bang when fired, completely blew their minds" Glover laughed "Pardon the pun" Shining groaned in mock disgust at the pun before drinking from his coffee.

"Yeah, she met another kid, her pen-pal from school I think, and to be honest I thought she'd hook up with him" Shining shrugged, debating whether to add more sugar, contemplating his wife's advice that more sugar would ruin his body-builder physique. Carefully discarding the suggestion he poured a small tube of sugar into his cup and stirred it thoroughly, enjoying the taste of the beverage much more.

"Oh?" Glover hummed "And who was that?"

"Kid named Peter Parker, and for the first time I think Twilight's met someone who might be an intellectual match for her, if not close to it" Shining explained "I nearly punched the kid square in the jaw for eyeing up my wife, though" Glover rolled his eyes and leaned against the wall.

"You need to stop threatening everyone kid, it's not good for your image" Glover said with a chuckle.

"I can't help it, I'm very protective of the girls in my life" Shining laughed, sipping from his cup again "And you're right, I shouldn't threaten the kid, he doesn't have a chance with Cadance"

"Why is that Shining?" Glover asked.

"Because, he's a nerdy kid with no game, can barely hold a conversation with a woman and wouldn't know where to put himself if a woman decided she liked him and made a move" Shining described, taking a large gulp from his coffee.

"Stop me if I'm wrong, but, so were you at his age" Glover grinned "And Cadance fell for you, didn't she? Shining froze in place, his eyes widening in shock. He looked at Glover straight in the eyes before speaking into his cup.

"Fuck" was all he said. Glover laughed loudly at the younger man's reaction before patting him on the shoulder.

"I'd keep an eye on that kid if I were you, he might just pull the rug out from under you" Glover joked. Shining finished his cup, now feeling slightly sour at the fact he may have competition before nodding quickly.

"Alright boss, great to talk to you but I've got a fuck-ton of work to get done before I can go home" Shining said.

"Right then, see you later kid" Glover nodded, finishing his coffee and throwing it into the stationed trash can. The two turned and walked back to their offices and Shining slumped back into his desk, waiting a few minutes before the caffeine kicked in. He was ready to pick up his pencil and start working again before his phone went off in his pocket, buzzing loudly in its silent function. He slipped it out of his pocket and checked the caller ID.

"Cadance... oh shit" Shining said, realizing what day it was. He answered the phone and put it to his ear, waiting for his wife to greet him first.

"Hey honey, uh, are you gonna be home soon?" Cadance asked "I'm getting kinda lonely drinking by myself"

"Sorry babe, I'm not gonna be able to make it home any time soon" Shining sighed "I've got a hell of a lotta work to get finished before I can leave, do you wanna head to bed and I'll wake you when I get home?"

"Shiny, you promised me that you'd be home by now" Cadance moped, her misery seeping through the phone "And you also promised that you wouldn't let work get between our special nights, remember?" Shining rubbed his eyes with a hand, guilt welling up in his chest before he spoke again.

"I know, I know and I'm really sorry, but this work needs to be done and then I'll be home as soon as possible" Shining pleaded.

"Is this work that needs to be finished or work that you want to finish?" she asked angrily.

"Cadance..." Shining said.

"Well, what is it Shining-" Cadance began before a loud shattering sound cut her off, followed by an agonized scream and the line going dead. Alarms went off in Shining's head, frantic thoughts and theories blasting through his mind as to what the fuck had just happened.

"Cadance... Cadance!" He roared down the line before throwing his phone across the room. He yanked open his desk and retrieved his gun, belting it onto his waist and nearly throwing his chair out from underneath him.


Shining sprinted up the stairs, his great height allowing him to take them four at a time. His white shirt was soaked through from the pouring rain outside and his hair was plastered to his head, droplets falling off as he made it to the penthouse landing. The door to his apartment was lying in pieces inside the apartment with the furniture inside the hall destroyed. grabbing his gun from his belt, he dashed inside and aimed the gun, checking corner after corner before he came into the living room where he saw a sight that made his heart drop.

"Cadance!" he screamed, sprinting over to his wife's body, lying in a pool of her own blood. He dropped to his knees and placed two fingers on a vein on her neck. After holding his breath he could feel a very faint pulse, signifying that she was alive. He frantically looked her over, his rage building and mixing with his anguish as he saw her injuries. Both of her hands were cut and bleeding, fingers dislocated with large gashes running up her arms. Her shirt had been torn off and there were bruises and cuts all over her stomach and chest, one of her arms wrenched from the socket with violent hand marks on her neck with blood on her nose, forehead and mouth. Her eyes were black and her mouth was swollen, blood running from her lip and down to her chin. Her hair was clumped and stuck together with her own blood with several strands having been torn and slashed. He turned her over and checked her back, looking like she had been stomped on repeatedly.

"Armour!" a voice yelled, Glover's voice, from the entrance.

"In here!" he roared back, holding back his anger and tears as he held his wife close to him. Glover ran in and surveyed the scene before his eyes fell onto Cadance.

"Fuck me" he gasped, his eyes wide and terrified.

"Call an ambulance!" Shining hollered, looking at his wife's battered face as her eyelids fluttered gently. He lifted his head up and roared a primal, strained curse that caused the strings of the guitar in the corner to vibrate loudly, tears dripping onto his wife's chest as he began to weep in pure rage.

Aftermath

Peter sat with his legs crossed on the floor, tightening screws and adjusting fittings on his web-shooters to try and achieve the perfect fit. In his trial run he had succeeded in creating web-shooters that functioned for travel but he hadn't considered, for some reason, extended use of said web-shooters. When he had used them for longer periods of time he had found that the cuff of the shooter had begun to rub away at his wrist and had left a very red and very sore series of scuffs on both of his wrists.

"Maybe I could add some cloth padding to the undersides of them?" Peter asked himself, looking at the inside of the shooters "No... that would get really gross whenever I started to sweat and I don't want that... maybe water pads? No, they could burst if I angle my wrist wrong or pressure gets put on them... maybe Twilight knows?" Peter took out his phone and unlocked it, preparing to dial Twilight's number for his request before he realized something.

"How... how am I gonna ask her this without telling her that I have web shooters?" Peter asked slowly "Just 'Hey Twilight, I'm just calling to ask you about how I can get my watches to stop rubbing my wrist raw when they move around repeatedly... what's that? Why are they doing that? Oh well, you know, because they just do', yeah, that'll go over real well Parker" He was going to put his phone back into his pocket before it began to vibrate loudly, the caller ID showing that it was Twilight calling.

"Huh" he said in a surprised tone "Spooky" He answered the call and placed it next to his ear while still tinkering with his web-shooters.

"Peter!?" a hysterical Twilight demanded. The loudness of the voice caused him to recoil in shock, his phone slipping away from his shoulder and dropping to the floor.

"Peter, come on, answer me!" Twilight yelled, sounding like she was sobbing.

"I'm here!" Peter called out, dropping his screwdriver and picking the phone back up again "What's wrong?"

"It's Cadance... she... she's" Twilight said, unable to speak before wailing loudly. There was the sound of the phone changing hands before Harry's voice came from the speaker.

"Pete?" he asked.

"Dude, what the fuck's happening?" Peter asked "What's wrong with Twilight... and Cadance?"

"Cadance was attacked earlier tonight, like, beaten all to hell" Harry answered.

"What?!" Peter demanded "By who?"

"We don't know, Shining found her lying nearly dead in a pool of blood and they rushed her to hospital, she's stable but she's not gonna wake up any time soon" Harry explained. Peter was silent for a brief second, his hand clenching tightly as his eyes shot to his wardrobe where his evening suit was hanging until needed.

"Do we have any idea, even a little, who did it?" he asked.

"I just said we don't know, and until Cadance waked up we're in the dark on this one" Harry sighed "Shining's been tearing this place apart and we've had to retrain him twice already"

"I can imagine..." Peter nodded, his eyes falling back down from his wardrobe, knowing he had nothing to go on "How long are you going to be there for?"

"I'm gonna stay for as long as I have to" Harry answered "This has really messed everyone up, and none of us have any why this happened" Peter stared at his web-shooters for a brief second before his eyes widened in realization.

"I think Shining might" Peter whispered.

"What d'you mean by-" Harry began before Peter hung up the call and stuffed his phone back into his pocket. He picked up his web-shooters and fastened them onto his wrists, rolling and moving his joint to see if his adjustments were good enough. He pulled on his jacket and put his shoes on before turning off his bedroom light and leaping out of the window, making his way to Midtown Hospital.


Harry sat with Twilight leaning on his arm, staring at the open window slightly down the hallway where a pair of thin drapes were blowing lightly. He heard Shining shout something at the nurses seeing to Cadance, turning his head quickly to see the large man retrain himself from throwing a table across the room by clapping his hands to his face. There was a loud squeak of rubber on the laminate flooring and Harry turned around quickly to see Peter of all people, standing up from what looked like a crouch, and rushing over to them. His usually thick and strong quiff was wind-whipped and messy now, appearing as if he'd been out in a storm, and he seemed slightly out of breath.

"Pete?" Harry asked in confusion "Where'd you come from?" Peter ignored the question and looked around for something.

"Where's Shining?" he asked over his shoulder.

"In with Cadance... but only family are allowed to-" Harry began. By the time he'd finished the second word Peter was already striding across the hall to Cadance's room. Peter opened the door and walked in, looking left to right as he saw a pair of nurses, Shining and two people he guessed were Shining's parents.

"Excuse me young man but I'm going to have to ask you to leave" the nurse said, blocking his way. He looked over the nurse at Shining who was red faced and still furious, seemingly ignoring the scene going on around him.

"I think I know what happened to Cadance" he blurted out before he was pushed out. Shining whipped around to look at Peter, his eyes red and bloodshot. He stormed over to him and glared furiously.

"You better not be fucking with me kid" Shining growled.

"I have an idea of what happened but I'm not completely-" Peter began. His sixth-sense went off as he saw Shining lunge his hands forward. Deciding to play it cool he allowed Shining to grab hold of the scruff of his shirt and push him up against the wall.

"Shining!" his mother yelled. Shining ignored him and glowered down at Peter.

"This isn't a joke Parker, my wife nearly died tonight because of this, and if you're not sure about something in your stupid mind then..." Shining said, closing a hand around his throat in pure rage "Then you better not fucking talk!" His actions made it Peter's turn to lose his temper. He looked around Shining to see his father attempt to move him back. Anger flared up in Peter's eyes as he grabbed hold of Shining's wrists and wrenching them apart before running his hands down the insides of his arms and with a push he placed his hand on Shining's chest before balling his fists around his shirt. Twilight and Peter were on their feet, watching this from the doorway as Peter used his super strength to whirl around and lift Shining off his feet, pinning him up against the wall and holding him there. Peter's heart pounded in his chest, his eyes locking with Shining's as the anger vanished from both of them. Peter dropped Shining back to his feet and backed away slowly, noting the glances of amazement in the eyes of those around him.

"P-Pete... what the hell was that?" Harry asked, looking at his friend in shock.

"Never mind" peter said, shaking his head and turning around, avoiding the eyes of those looking at him "I think I know what happened to Cadance... why it happened at least" Shining straightened his shirt and cleared his throat.

"Go... go on" he said, unwilling to speak or apologize about what had just happened.

"You told me when my Uncle was killed that his killer had been blown up in an attack on the crime scene and forensics officers right?" Peter asked.

"Yes" Shining nodded.

"They did it because they thought you were going to be there..." Peter continued slowly "And when that failed they decided to go after Cadance instead"

"As a warning" Shining mumbled, clenching his fists angrily.

"Exactly" Peter nodded, turning to look at Cadance's battered form, hooked up to breathing apparatus and life support machines. It hit him for the first time just how badly beaten she'd been. He'd seen police reports and read comics where the hero's love interest or best friend had been attacked in an alley but they'd walked out with a swollen lip, black eye and a stitch on their forehead. This wasn't like that. Cadance had been ravaged, her face was swollen, bruised. There were stitches, bandages and casts all over her in an attempt to keep this once goddess-like figure in one piece. He could still see her beauty, buried underneath the pain and agony she'd had inflicted on her that night. It was only when a hand touched his shoulder he realized that he'd been shaking violently.

"I think you need to leave young man" a woman's voice said, presumably Shining's mother "This is something you shouldn't see at your age" Peter nodded and numbly allowed himself to be steered out of the room. The middle-aged woman closed the door with her soft hands and placed a gentle one on Peter's back, guiding him back to where Harry and Twilight had sat down again. Peter sat down as the woman crouched in front of him, a soft smile on her face. She was a woman that looked just like Twilight but with lighter purple eyes, and white streaks in her hair that had been tied up into a bun.

"Are you alright?" she asked in a kind, caring tone.

"Y-Yeah" Peter nodded, regaining himself slightly, enough to smile weakly at her.

"What's your name young man?"

"Uh, Peter, Peter Parker" he answered. She looked at him with a raised eyebrow before nodding her head.

"You wouldn't happen to be May Parker's nephew would you?" she asked.

"Yeah, I am..." Peter said in a confused tone "How do you know her?"

"We went to high school together, we were close friends from the minute we met, us and another woman named Anna Watson" she answered "When my family moved back to New York I found out we worked at the same hospital together, we're both nurses" she explained.

"Right" Peter nodded, staring blankly once more.

"I heard about what happened to your uncle Ben" she said with a sad expression "I'm sorry"

"Thanks" Peter nodded "You're Twilight's mother aren't you?"

"Yes, my name is Twilight Velvet" she nodded "My daughter's Twilight Junior"

"I think he knows that Mom" Twilight said, sniffling into Harry's shoulder.

"I know dear... are you alright now?" Mrs Velvet asked her daughter.

"I'm getting better Mom, thanks" she nodded.

"Harry?" Velvet queried.

"I'm good thanks Mrs V" Harry nodded.

"That's good to hear, I'm sorry about what Shining did Peter" she said, turning to face Peter again.

"He was angry, I don't blame him" Peter shrugged, feeling a little more life come back to him as the minutes went by. He sat back in his seat and sighed loudly, rubbing his eyes before taking off his jacket and setting it on the seat behind him. The second he set the jacket down he nearly punched himself in the face. He had just exposed his web-shooters to everyone in front of him and he prayed to God that no one would notice them. He clicked the triggers back into their slots, an edition he was thankful he'd added earlier, and kept praying no one saw them.

God apparently hates Peter Parker

"Nice watches Peter" Twilight said, eyeing up the silver wrist bands with suspicion.

"Uh... thanks Twilight" Peter said, trying to keep his nervousness suppressed. Harry looked down at them and scoffed loudly, looking at his friend with a smug face.

"Where did you dig those old things out from Peter?" Harry asked "The old Stark-Silver-Bands, I remember that my Dad had them when they first came out in the nineties, the versions you've got are the ones they made before they even did anything" Peter sung praises to any other gods he could think of for having Harry mistake them for something else, deciding to play along with it.

"Hey, I don't have a multi-billion dollar bank account to buy new things Harry, I found them in a yard sale and liked the look of them, they were only ten bucks" Peter said, feigning an offended appearance.

"You could've at least looked for the newer versions that have a stop-watch or a regular watch in them, the ones you've got are just boring fashion accessories" Harry said, rolling up his sleeve and revealing a stained-black silver band with a fancy time piece in the centre "Now these are the better ones and they only set me back about four hundred bucks" Peter looked at his friend with a bemused expression before sighing loudly.

"I have never heard you sound so stuck up in my entire life before now" he chuckled.

"Sorry, everyone has to slip now and again" Harry chuckled, patting his friend on the shoulder.

"Good to see everyone's feeling alright" Mrs Velvet nodded "I think you should head home now and get some rest, you've all got school tomorrow"

"Right, I'll call for a ride from one of my drivers" Harry said.

"I think I'll walk home thanks" Peter said, standing up and grabbing his jacket, pulling it back on and hiding the web-shooters, thankful that Harry had confused them for something else.

"Are you sure?" Velvet asked "It can be dangerous at there at night"

"I'm fine thank you, I can handle myself" Peter nodded. walking off down the corridor after waving goodbye to his friends.

Recovery

Peter held the red mask up in the mirror, staring into the eyes he had needed to modify several times to be able to see out of the damn thing before turning it over in his hand and throwing it back into the wardrobe. He had been pacing the room for the better part of ten minutes as he waited for a call from Twilight. The doctors had said that she'd shown signs of waking up in the early hours of the morning and the family had been called in to be there when she woke up. Peter had explained to his Aunt May where he'd been the previous night and she'd been horrified about what had happened to Cadance, stating that she'd always been her favourite princess of the three, and that Peter needed to be honoured that he knew her.

"I never realized that my Aunt May was a Cadance fan girl" Peter chuckled, dropping down onto his front and beginning to do push-ups whilst talking to himself "I really hope she makes it through this alright... this kinda stuff can scar people for life" Peter held himself in a planking position for a brief second before using his heightened core strength lift push with his toes and lift himself up into a handstand. He held himself there while he continued to monologue.

"She was in really bad shape too... everyone just seemed wrecked that night" Peter sighed, doing handstand push-ups as he spoke "On the plus side, I got to meet Twilight's gorgeous mother" He lowered himself down into a push up position and crossed his ankles over whilst spreading his hands out further, training a different part of his torso.

"If Twilight ends up getting the same bust size as her mother then Harry's gonna be a lucky guy" Peter grunted, jumping and clapping his hands as he reached the apex of his push up "Though I never expected Twilight to be mixed race... I thought her parents were both black... I guess that explains why Shining's skin colour is the different from hers" Peter dropped to the floor and rolled over, using his feet to stick to the floor as he began to train his abdomen.

"Am I fucking stupid?" he asked himself in surprise "Twilight has a Caucasian body type but a darker skin tone, a mix from both of her mother and her father, while Shining is just a white guy... a huge white guy. I wonder what was going through everyone's heads when six-foot-four, two hundred and forty pound muscle man Shining Armour was strong-armed up a wall by five foot seven, hundred and ten pounds Peter Parker" He chuckled to himself for a brief second before groaning loudly.

"Am I really doing a poor-man's workout while discussing my friend's ethnicity?" he asked himself in amazement "And then complimenting myself on pushing around her older brother?" He looked in the mirror behind him and sighed.

"Yes Parker, yes you are" he muttered before restarting his sit-ups, a thought brewing in his head "Still, Twilight is a real treat to look at, and she's got a great personality to boot... maybe I should start searching for a girlfriend, after all, I'm sick of getting blisters and friction burns all the time" He rolled forward after completing one hundred sit ups and got to his feet. His workouts never lasted long and because of this he never built up much muscle. He was a skinny little rake with the faintest hint of a six-pack on his stomach and he hated this fact. He knew he'd have to start bulking up if he wanted to look impressive enough to get a girlfriend.

"Then again, what girl is gonna sacrifice her social... everything by going out with Puny Parker over here?" he asked himself.

"Well if you didn't spend all day locked away in your room and met some people maybe you would have a girlfriend Peter" May said. Peter had to activate his adhesive powers to stop himself from back flipping onto the ceiling out of sheer terror.

"Jesus!" Peter bellowed, whipping around to see his Aunt May standing in the doorway with a pile of laundry in her arms "Knock first will you?"

"Sorry, I forget you're at the age where the only thing you play with now is your games and yourself" she smirked.

"That's disgusting" Peter said with a point of his finger and a look of revulsion.

"Well don't tell me that, you're the one doing it" May countered.

"No I am not!" Peter snapped.

"Really?" May asked with a cocked eyebrow "Well the stains on your sheets tell me a different story"

"Leave now, I am not discussing this with you" Peter snapped, walking over to her and gently guiding her out of the room "Begone heathen!"

"Hey, I'm not judging you Peter" May laughed as Peter closed the door behind her "It's completely natural at your age" Peter made a gagging noise before walking back over to his computer and sitting down in his chair.

"I really wish I didn't have to have that talk" he sighed.

"It washes out well with cleaning tablets!" May called from downstairs.

Peter chose to ignore her.


Twilight watched as her sister in law gently moved the cup of coffee to her swollen lips, her hands bandaged and trembling. They'd tried their best to sort her hair out but since she couldn't stand just yet they couldn't get her into the shower to clean her off completely.

"How're you feeling?" Twilight asked, unable to stop smiling since her sister had woken up.

"I'm fine Twiley, you've asked me that four times in the past hour" Cadance chuckled, her voice sounding much rougher than her usual sweet, sing-song voice.

"I know... I'm just so glad you're OK, I don't know what I'd do without you" Twilight said, drumming on her knees "You're my big sister and I love you to pieces"

"I love you too Twilight, you're the best little sister I could've gotten" Cadance said, sipping from the coffee "Ugh... all I can taste is my own breath"

"It's not that bad Cadance" Twilight said, dismissively.

"Oh yeah?" she asked, cocking an eyebrow "Shining nearly threw up when he kissed me this morning"

"Oh, fuck" Twilight blinked.

"Language" Cadance commented.

"Sorry" Twilight nodded "Do you want me to get you some gum or something?"

"I'd love that, but the doctors say they don't want me chewing anything solid because my jaw's weakened and might break" Cadance sighed "I'm eating nothing but soup and drinking nothing but mineral water"

"It's not that carbonated shit is it?" Twilight asked.

"Hey, stop swearing" Cadance tutted.

"Sorry" Twilight repeated.

"Twiley, you're not sorry about it so just stop apologizing" Cadance said with a quizzical look.

"You're right and I will" Twilight nodded, looking around the room.

"Where's your boyfriend anyway?" Cadance asked "He was outside when I woke up wasn't he?"

"His Dad called him back to Oscorp to close out a deal or some shit like that" Twilight shrugged. The two women locked eyes and a grin spread onto Twilight's face as Cadance stared at her with a bemused look in her eyes.

"Now you're just doing it to annoy me" she giggled.

"I know, I know" Twilight sniggered "I'll stop now" There came a knock at the door and Twilight parents stuck their heads in.

"You two alright?" Twilight's father asked with a smile.

"Yeah thanks, Dad" Twilight nodded.

"We're good Night" Cadance seconded.

"Do you need anything Dear?" Mrs Velvet asked.

"No thanks Mrs Velvet" Cadance said with a shake of her head "We're all set"

"Good to hear... where did Shining go?" Mrs Velvet asked.

"I managed to convince him to get some sleep in a spare bed, he's been awake for thirty five hours straight" Cadance said.

"Poor boy" Night Light chuckled "He never thinks about his own well being, no matter how much it'll badly affect him"

"He gets that from you" Mrs Velvet said with a smile, patting her husband on the cheek.

"Excuse me?" Harry's voice said from behind them.

"Oh, sorry Harry" Night Light said, moving aside and allowing the young man to get past him. He placed a vase of pink tulips on the table next to Cadance before sitting down next to Twilight.

"Awww, thanks Harry" Cadance said with a wide smile, showing off her thankfully-intact teeth and still beautiful smile.

"No problem, they're a gift from my mother and I" Harry nodded, returning the smile.

"You didn't call Peter on your way here did you?" Twilight asked.

"Oh crap, I forgot to" Harry said sheepishly, getting a glare from his girlfriend "I'll do that now" Harry took out his phone and called Peter. The ringer sound for a few brief seconds before Peter picked up.

"Hello?" Peter's voice asked.

"Hey dude, Cadance is up and grinning and the hospital staff are allowing visitors, we'll give them your name and they should let you see her, where are you?" Harry explained.

"Midtown" Peter asked "Just having a stroll along the tracks"

"You better not be on the train tracks Peter, do you know how many people die on those things a year?" Harry asked.

"Yes, Mr. Statistics I am aware, I'm also too good to be hit by a train, and besides, I'll hear one of them coming anyway" Peter said confidently.

"Not now you won't, Oscorp upgraded the materials and frames of all the trains in the city to make them more eco-friendly and quieter, you won't hear those things until they're right on top of you"

"Yeah, I'm calling bullshit on that, there's no way in hell a train can sneak-" Peter's voice said only to be drowned out by the sound of a train horn and the rushing sound of wind. A look of horror shot onto everyone's faces as they could hear nothing more than the wind rushing by.

"Peter... Peter!" Harry yelled.

"He didn't just get hit by one did he?" Cadance asked in horror, a hand over her mouth.

"I don't know" Harry said, his breathing increasing "Peter!?" There was a moment of silence before Peter's voice became audible once more.

"Well... that fuckin' hurt" he moaned. There was a loud groan from Peter, another thump and a bout of pained laughter.

"What the hell just happened Peter?" Harry asked slowly "We thought you just got hit by a train... did you jump off the tracks?"

"No..." Peter answered.

"Did... did you dodge out of the way?" Harry asked in a much slower voice.

"...No" Peter answered "Where'd the blood come from?... Oh shit, that's my blood"

"What are you doing!?" Twilight demanded, grabbing the phone from Harry and turning up the loud speaker so everyone could hear him.

"You know, just lying on the train tracks trying to figure out which way is up" Peter chuckled.

"Where, if it did, did it hit you?" Twilight asked, her temper dying down as Harry put a hand on her shoulder.

"It hit me in... just clipped me in the... everywhere" Peter gasped, groaning as he performed some kind of strenuous action.

"Are you bleeding seriously Peter?" Mrs Velvet asked, walking over to the chair next to Twilight and sitting down.

"No, just a cut on my forehead" he answered, seemingly moving faster than before by the sound of the wind picking up again "I'm OK I think, I'm just glad I found out that I'm superior to a train in terms of dexterity"

"Probably from that thick skull of yours" Twilight growled.

"Thanks Twilight Peter said, his breathing becoming heavy "Cadance?"

"Yes?" she asked, worry gleaming in her gorgeous eyes.

"Is there any room at the foot of your bed I can just lie down on?" Peter asked jokingly "I need a nap"

"Plenty Peter, just get here quickly and we'll see if you're OK" Cadance nodded "See you when you get here"

"You too, bye guys" Peter said before hanging up the phone. Twilight placed a hand to her forehead and sighed loudly.

"He's a fucking moron" she growled.

"Language" the adults scolded.


Twilight leaned against the window with her elbows, nursing an energy drink slowly as she waited for her food to be brought in. Cadance had become tired several minutes earlier and the nurses had suggested that she get some rest, asking everyone to leave her for a few hours. And since then she'd been standing around, waiting for Harry to bring back their food from the cafeteria. She was roused from her thoughts as a knock came at the window. She turned around to see Peter leaning against the fire escape outside, looking messy. His hair was falling down over his face instead of standing up and he appeared to be drenched in sweat, his jacket covered in oil and grime and a line of blood running down from the left side of his forehead.

"He looks... kinda hot" Twilight thought to herself before mentally slapping the idea out of her head "Down girl, you're already taken" Twilight opened the window and Peter leaped through, landing on his feet and dropping into a low crouch before standing up straight. Twilight looked over Peter's shoulder to see a backpack, fastened tightly around his chest and shoulders.

"Peter, why were you on the fire escape?" she asked, crossing her arms.

"To get up to this floor" Peter said in a matter-of-fact voice as if his answer was the obvious one.

"It's twenty stories up, why didn't you use the front door?" she asked.

"The doorman's intimidating" Peter shrugged, slinging his backpack off his back and opening it.

"What'd you bring?" she asked.

"Flowers" Peter answered, reaching into the bag.

"After parkouring twenty floors up and getting hit by a train, do you think they're going to be in any sort of presentable shape?" Twilight asked. Peter threw a long, black metal tube up out of the bag and caught it with his other hand.

"Yes" he nodded, unscrewing the top of the tube and revealing a bunch of closed flowers.

"Good job Peter, they're not even blooming yet" Twilight said sarcastically, applauding him quietly.

"That's the trick, flowers like this don't bloom when they're in darkness" he said, holding the tube out into the rays of sunshine, several seconds passing before they began to slowly open "But when they're exposed to sunlight they open" Twilight watched as the green stems opened widely into an array of beautiful petals that matched the colours of Cadance's hair.

"Wow Pete, what are they?" Twilight asked.

"They're an Oscorp-designed breed of flowers that can have their petal pigment altered by certain chemicals, I call them Dyeing Flowers" Peter said.

"You're gonna need to work on that name there chief" Twilight commented quickly.

"Yeah, I came up with a better one, Painted Petals" Peter nodded.

"Not as contradictory but still terrible nonetheless" Twilight shrugged.

"Thanks Twilight" Peter groaned "Do you think she'll like them?"

"We'll find out when she wakes up" Twilight said. Peter sighed loudly, rolling his head back and cursing under his breath.

"I'm too late?" he asked "Fuck"

"Pete, she's not dead, she'll be up in a few hours" Twilight chuckled.

"I know but I'll be gone by then... I think I'll give them to her now" Peter said.

"Well good luck getting past the security" Twilight said, jabbing her thumb towards the large security guard positioned outside the door to the room. Peter nodded slowly, allowing the flowers to close up again before putting the cap back on them and putting them back into his bag.

"I'll think of something" Peter said confidently.

"Or you could just wait for her to wake up!" Twilight snapped "You're gonna cause a problem when there doesn't need to be one!"

"You do know me right, that's what I'm known for" Peter chuckled "Hold tight, I'll be back soon" Twilight growled angrily as Peter walked out of the hallway and into a stairwell, wondering what he was going to do and how he was going to mess it up.


Peter's eyes locked on an air vent on the ceiling above him and, after making sure there were no cameras or nearby people, he leaped up the wall and over to the vent, pulling off the cover and crawling inside.

"Colonel Campbell... he thought to himself jokingly "I've infiltrated the Black Mesa stronghold, patch me to Naomi" He placed the vent back over the hole and used his webbing to hold it in place before crawling through the vents as quietly as possible. Using his photographic memory he mapped out the paths the air vent would take in its concealed place in the ceiling, taking turns that would guide him closer and closer to Cadance's room.

"I wonder if I'm going to run into Meryl doing sit ups in here?" he thought again, cracking a smile at his own terrible humour. He checked the grates in the vents for any sign of Cadance before finally spotting her lying asleep on her back with her hands on her stomach. Peter grinned triumphantly as he had located the room before freezing in place. The last thing he wanted to do right now was make a noise that could either wake Cadance up or alert the doorman outside. Thinking quickly he used the flat of his fingertip to unscrew the fastenings on the vent cover before slowly moving in in front of him, planning his next move. Jumping down was something he couldn't do because there was no way he could soften his landing enough to make no sound.

"Think Parker, how would Sam Fisher or Solid Snake do this? Peter thought. As he stared in front of him he noticed something in clinging to the roof of the vent. It was a little black spider with small legs and a large body. It was moving away from him, feeling threatened by his presence no doubt, and an idea came to him.

"How would you do it?" he mentally asked the spider, watching it for any hints on how to proceed. As he watched he saw the spider stick a web to the ceiling and begin to lower itself down using it legs and more webbing. A flash of inspiration illuminated Peter's mind as he used his web-shooter to attach a web to the roof of the vent. After shifting awkwardly into position he stuck his head out of the vent and began to slowly release more webbing to lower himself down. He surveyed the room quickly, the curtains drawn to make it darker and the cute sound of Cadance sleeping were the first thing he realized. He could then hear a clock ticking from the table and on the wall as well as the doorman tapping his foot outside. He could feel the vibrations coming through the webbing he held onto, the same way a real spider tracked the movements of its prey. A wide grin spread onto his face as he came closer and closer to assuming the identity of Spider-Man, so close now he could almost taste it. He slowly touched down on the floor and threw the web back into the vent, knowing that if Cadance woke up or anybody walked into the room and saw it his Spider-Man career would be over.

"Alright, quietly now" he thought to himself, taking off his backpack and taking out the vase of flowers, unscrewing the lid as quietly as possible before placing the vase on the table next to somebody else's flowers. With a sigh of relief he stood up and backed away from the table, preparing to find a way to get back into the vent when he heard a muffled yawning sound from behind him.

"Oh... fuck" he mentally groaned, clenching his fists as he heard the princess begin to stir.

"Huh..." her faint, sweet voice said from behind him "Peter?" Peter slowly pivoted and looked at her with a weak smile, his eyes downcast as he looked at her injured form.

"Hey... Cadance" he said softly, whispering as quietly as possible. Cadance rubbed her eyes, wincing briefly as she forgot how sore they were, before she sat up in bed.

"When did you get in?" Cadance asked, inclining her head to the side and smiling sweetly. Peter felt sweat begin to grease his palms as his heart-rate increased, finding himself unable to speak.

"Are, you OK Peter?" she asked, looking down for a second before remembering what had happened to him "Oh, the train!" Peter's ears flinched at the sudden decibel increase Cadance made that no doubt alerted the doorman outside. Which it did. The doorman swung the door open, pointing a gun at Peter.

"Freeze!" he yelled. If Peter had kept his cool the situation might have been diffused quickly with a sentence or two from Cadance. Instead, Peter reached for his pocket, which the guard took as a threat, and he pulled the trigger. The gunshot sent off an alarm throughout the whole floor, getting everyone's attention. For Peter, time seemed to slow down as he saw the bullet slowly emerge from the gun. He strode forward and bent his furthest leg, dropping to his knee as the bullet whizzed over his head. He stood up and lung forward, his hand being a millimetre away from the gun as a second shot was fired. Time then rocketed forward as Peter slapped the gun aside, lunged forward and caught the doorman's throat with his elbow before pivoting on his left heel and slamming the flat of his foot into the doorman. The force of the attack launched him out of the room and down the hallway. Peter dropped down onto one knee, suddenly out of breath. People surveyed the scene before rushing over to them, some checking the doorman and others checking Peter.

"Peter!" Twilight yelled as he climbed up to his feet, wrapping his arms around his own waist to give himself a sense of security before he had a panic attack. Shining and his family came sprinting around the corner while Cadance looked out of the door. Peter quickly whipped around and ran back into the room.

"Did he hit you?" Peter asked frantically, looking her up and down, still gripping his waist as he tried to steady his breath.

"N-No... holy fuck" she panted, her eyes wide with adrenaline.

"What the fuck just happened!?" Shining demanded, grabbing Peter and pulling him away from Cadance.

"I snuck in to give Cadance some flowers but when she woke up the guy came in and started fucking shooting!" Peter exclaimed "Cadance didn't get hit, she's fine"

"What the fuck were you thinking!?" Shining demanded, grabbing Peter's arm and dragging him outside the room "He probably thought you were trying to kill her!"

"Look, I didn't mean it!" Peter screamed placing his fingers to his head "He just started shooting and I had to stop-" Peter's voice trailed off as he looked as his right hand, his blood-soaked right hand. He began to panic as he looked at his hand with terrified eyes.

"What?" Shining demanded, glaring a Peter's face "What's wrong?" Shining grabbed Peter's hand and looked at the blood for a brief second before cursing under his breath.

"Get a medic!" he yelled over his shoulder "We've got a gunshot wound" Twilight's hand fell over her mouth and Peter looked at the bloody hole on his grey Ramones shirt, his expression completely blank as Shining guided him over a chair where a team of nurses ran over to him.

Out of Your League

"I really don't see what all the big fuss is about" Peter said, sitting cross-legged on his bed while eating an apple "The doctors said it didn't hit anything major besides muscle tissue, what little there is, and a few days at the gym should help build it back up" May stood completely still, stunned by how her nephew was reacting to the fact he'd just woken from surgery to have a bullet removed from his lower abdomen.

"You have just been shot!" May exclaimed hysterically "You need to take this a little bit more serious" Peter swallowed the apple chunk he'd been chewing before shrugging.

"Eh, it's a flesh wound"

From outside the room Twilight could hear the family members arguing with each other as the doorman who'd been knocked out by Peter was being walked out of the ward.

"This is unbelievable" she said, putting a hand to her face "How did this even happen?"

"He was only trying to be nice" Cadance said quietly. She'd been trying her bet for the past half an hour to make sure Peter didn't get into trouble for what he'd done but the doorman seemed adamant that it was Peter's fault to begin with.

"I know that" Shining said angrily "But he also ended causing a trained professional to discharge a firearm in self defence"

"I've told you before, he shot first" Cadance interrupted her husband.

"Because Peter made a gesture that he was going for a gun" Shining refuted.

"Guys, this isn't getting us anywhere!" Twilight snapped. Shining whirled around and glared at her.

"And where the hell are we supposed to get Twilight?" he demanded "The situation has been defused so all we can do now is argue, so just let the adults talk about this"

"Don't talk to me like I'm a child Shining" Twilight hissed.

"Why shouldn't I?" he demanded "You are a child, you have no idea what's going on right now"

"Neither do you!" Twilight yelled. The siblings glared at each other hatefully before Cadance's phone began to vibrate. She picked it up and looked at the caller ID, a surprised expression springing onto her face.

"Shhh!" she hissed before answering the phone "Aunt Celestia?" Everyone in the room froze at the mention of the name. They all held a sense of awe at the fact that the leader, the founder of the country was speaking through the phone.

"Cadance, Dear" a regal, clear and beautiful voice spoke "I heard what happened to you, are you alright?"

"Yes thank you Auntie" Cadance nodded "I'm healing nicely now, I'm just in hospital with the family and a few friends"

"That is incredible news my Dear, when are you expected to make a recovery?" the Princess asked in a happy tone.

"In a few weeks, most of the damage was skin level thanks to our... uh... gene type" Cadance said, pausing to find a particular word, "The bruises and swelling are going down and besides a few fractures I'm not too bad"

"Incredible... your Aunt Luna and I are in Germany at the moment on a conference tour but now that we have a date for your recovery we shall be in the country, don't you doubt it" she said in a pleasant, sing-song voice similar to her niece's.

"That's great!" Cadance exclaimed "I can't wait to see you two!"

"And we cannot wait to see you, but we must go now, give our love to Shining and company" Celestia hummed "I love you"

"I love you too Auntie" Cadance beamed, hanging up the phone "Isn't that great?"

"Yeah, I haven't seen those two since the wedding" Shining nodded "And Luna owes me forty bucks"

"I can't wait to see Princess Celestia again" Twilight chimed in "I really miss her lessons you know"

"It'll be good to catch up with her again" Mrs Velvet nodded "We used to have such great talks"

"Peter Benjamin Parker!" a furious voice hollered as the door to Peter's room opened. Peter strode out, fully dressed with shoes on, with a second apple in his hand.

"I'll see you at home Aunt May" Peter nodded, taking a bite out of the apple and looking back and forth between his friends and their family "What?"

"Why are you out of bed!?" Twilight, of all people, demanded. She grabbed hold of him by the jacket and placed her her face no more than two inches away from his "You better get back in there right now" Peter grinned cockily before striding past her and waving goodbye.

"I'll catch you guys later" he called back.

"You need to stay here and rest" Mrs Velvet called to him.

"I'm fine" he called back.

"Parker" Twilight growled, storming after him. As she attempted to grab hold of him again a door swung open and connected with the back of her knee, knocking it out from underneath her. She held her arms out to protect herself from the impact only to have the flat of Peter's hand connect with her stomach from in front of her and push her back up to her feet.

"Christ" Peter chuckled as a panicked hospital worker emerged from the door "This hospital is a fucking death trap" Twilight nodded, gingerly putting pressure on her leg before declaring it in good shape.

"Yeah" she nodded.

"I am so, so sorry" the hospital worker said "Are you OK?"

"I'm OK thanks, don't worry" Twilight nodded before turning back to Peter "But you need to stay here"

"No I don't, I'm a free bird" Peter winked. Twilight lowered her gaze for a second before a grin spread onto her face.

"Alright then, just show your discharge papers to the guys at the door and they'll let you out" she said, crossing her arms and standing as tall as she could.

"Fuck" Peter sighed, walking past Twilight and back into the hallway.

"That's what I thought buddy" Twilight chuckled victoriously. Peter sat down on one of the beds, eating his apple with a sulking expression.

"Well done Twilight" Mrs Velvet nodded "Quick thinking"

"Thanks Mom" Twilight smiled.

"I hate you" Peter mumbled, looking as his Aunt May stormed over to him "Oh no"

"Oh no is right" May yelled, clapping him on the back of the head "What the hell were you thinking you little smart-ass?"

"I don't wanna be here, I need to go home" Peter moped.

"And what could be so important as to risk your own life at home?" May demanded. Peter was silent for a second before speaking.

"I'm about fifteen head shots away from getting a rank up on my Kap-40s in Black Ops 2 and-" he began.

"Shut it" May snapped "You're staying here until the doctors say you can go, are we clear?"

"Yes Aunt May" Peter sighed in defeat.

"Well..." Cadance said, a few beds across from him "At least I can have someone to keep me company when you're all at work"

"But, doesn't Peter need to get his school work brought to him?" Mrs Velvet asked.

"Thankfully no, he got himself suspended for a few months" May sighed.

"How?" Mrs Velvet queried.

"I beat up the basketball team" Peter said casually, finishing off his apple and looking around. His eyes landed on a worker who was carrying a trash can over to a new spot.

"Kobe!" Peter grunted, throwing the core thirty feet down the corridor and into the trash can.

"Impressive Pete" Cadance nodded.

"Thank you" Peter chuckled "So, if I'm staying here then... somebody's gonna need to bring me a TV screen"


It was late in the evening, the staff had left, the curtains drawn and the lights were off. Peter had spent the past hour lying on his back staring at the dark ceiling, his night-vision having been amplified somehow by the spider bite enabling him to see everything in a light green hue. He'd been moved into the bed next to Cadance who was peacefully sleeping the night away while Peter just felt sick. He felt disappointed in himself for being shot. He hadn't even broken in his costume yet and he'd already been hospitalized through inadequate decision making. He'd fucked up and now he'd been fucked up.

"What goes around comes around I guess" he thought. It dawned on him that he really needed to go to the toilet but he decided to hold it on as he didn't want to risk waking Cadance again, still afraid that if he did a doorman would appear from the wall and shoot him again. His eyes wandered around the room, being able to see small rays of light reflecting off metallic objects and flaring brightly, just like regular night vision goggles. It was in the night vision he saw Cadance's figure move slightly. He looked at her for a second, watching closely for another sign of movement but when there was none he returned to staring at the ceiling. He then heard the sound of movement followed by Cadance's soft call.

"Peter?" she whispered "Are you awake?" He nearly immediately answered but a small niggling sensation in the back of his mind told him to keep quiet, to see what her response would be.

"Peter?" she asked again, followed by silence "Good" A small alarm rang in his head as he heard Cadance sit up, still looking at him, but after her next sentence his emotion changed to one of curiosity.

"Please don't wake up" she quietly begged. Out of the corner of his eyes Peter saw her climb out of bed and move between the two of their beds, hobbling slightly due to her leg cast. She walked down to the small pile of bags, her bags, that had been brought in my Shining and company for her to change into. The minute Peter ran the word change through his head he knew immediately what she was going to do.

"You close your eyes Parker, you look the fuck away right now you sick son of a bitch" he thought, ordering himself to avert his eyes. But he didn't, that perverted fifteen year old part of his mind told him to open his eyes as wide as he could and savour in the moment. Cadance moved, grabbing hold of the bottom of her hospital gown and pulling it up over her waist. Peter was thankful she had her back to him so that his sick mind couldn't see her body. As a stroke of luck for Peter's disgusted mind, revolted with his own desires, she was wearing underwear. And even better it wasn't lingerie, it was just plain and well-covering underwear. About as well as underwear could cover. She had revealed her long, slender legs and her curvy figure. Peter's heart began to pound in his chest as sweat began to form on his forehead. Knowing that he'd gone way too far he squeezed his eyes shut and turned over before he even looked at the top half of her body.

"Bad move kid" a mocking voice said in his head. The lurching feeling took him over as he rolled off the side of the bed and only managed to bring his hands up against the resistance of the covers before he collided with the floor. Peter's head connected with the floor despite his efforts to achieve the contrary and Cadance gasped loudly.

"Peter?" he asked in a loud whisper.

"Owww" he groaned, throwing his covers off him and getting up to his knees, doing his best to look like he'd just been rudely awakened by gravity "That fucking hurt"

"What happened?" Cadance asked, grabbing the covers off her bed and covering herself with them.

"I just had an express appointment with the floor" Peter groaned, feeling blood run from the re-opened cut on his forehead.

"Are you alright?" she asked him, placing a hand on his back "Peter... your shirt is soaked... have you been sweating"

"Nightmares" he coughed out, standing up and looking around, feeling strangely restricted by his Ramones shirt all of a sudden.

"Anything badly hurt?" Cadance asked as Peter climbed to his feet.

"Not really, I just opened my head again... I'll be back in a second, I need to go wash up" Peter moved past Cadance, trying his best to not make bodily contact with the beautiful woman before he walked out the bed alley and into the custom built en suite the room had.

"I need a shower" Peter said "Half eleven at night is a great time to wash up" He clicked on the light and walked into the large shower, turning the dials and waiting for the water to warm up. He slung his sweat soaked clothing off, his only clothing for that matter, and stepped under the spray. As he allowed the water to run over him he stood like a statue, allowing the water to splash onto his face from the large shower head.

"What the fuck is wrong with me?" he asked himself in disgust "She's a married woman and ten years older than me... why do I have a crush on her?" Peter mentally flashed through every time he'd ever looked at the beautiful deity of a woman before nodding his head.

"Oh yeah... that's why" he sighed, scrubbing his face with his hands to try and wash away the grime and the guilt. After only a few minutes he turned the shower off and grabbed a soft towel from the rack. He dried his hair, face and body before tying it around his waist and wondering what he was going to do. He had soaked his shirt and underwear with sweat and he was not going to put back on a pair of wet, salty boxers in this life. He wiped his fringe out of his eyes and looked at himself in the full body mirror. He stared at his face for a brief second before looking over his linguine body.

Or so he thought.

Peter's jaw nearly hit his toes when he looked at himself in the mirror. His usual spaghetti-strand body had changed dramatically. His shoulders were now broad, thick balls of muscle with powerful arms, each muscle large and trained. He looked at his pectoral muscles in shock, seeing two rather large, toned muscles that most fifteen year-old's weren't supposed to have. His abdomen was made up of a set of six abdominal muscles that were large and solid, as were the rest of his new muscles. He looked like a seasoned gym veteran who'd been working out their entire lives. He wasn't anything close to Arnold Schwarzenegger but his body was as muscular as a fifteen year old could physically be at his stage in his development. Now that he looked at himself, he seemed a few centimetres taller than he did the previous day. And chasing that he noticed that all of his baby fat had disappeared completely, his cheeks being sharp and defined with a masculine, broad jawline and a strong chin.

"What the fuck?" he asked himself. Of all the developments he had since the spider bite this was one of the most aesthetic and probably his favourite, definitely his favourite. After checking his legs to find that they were just as muscular and toned as his upper body, and an extra few horses added to the undercarriage, he couldn't have been happier about his figure.

"I- this is..." Peter said before the smile dropped off his face, realizing what this meant "If they see my like this after I was a skinny little twerp yesterday they're going to suspect something... I need to get out of here, this is getting a little bit out of my league"

The Ballroom Blitz. Feat. Spider-Man

With little to no repercussions, surprisingly,  from running away from the hospital Peter went about his business, goofing off, perfecting and adjusting his suit and equipment, pondering whether to create a Spider-Symbol or something like that. His sixth sense, now christened Spider-Sense, had been functioning properly without a hitch in times of danger and had evolved to be able to tell him when he was being watched, through eyes or through a camera lens, he would sense the eyes on him. He was sat in the top-left corner of his bedroom, browsing a few NSFW pictures on his phone, comparing the art styles of the rowdy images and deciding which one he liked the most.

"Should I follow them?" Peter asked, tapping his chin in thought "Their real account is a Tumblr exclusive and I don't have one... fuck it, I'll just wait for the reposts on Deviantart" Peter's browsing was interrupted by the caller ID picture springing up of Twilight. He was annoyed that his alone time had been interrupted before he decided to answer it.

"Hello?" he asked.

"How are you with parties?" the question came.

"OK, never ask a direct question like that again when I answer the phone" Peter said, blinking rapidly.

"What?" Twilight asked in confusion.

"I thought you were asking me if I liked scary movies... fuck me, Twilight" Peter sighed.

"First off, I'm too good for you-" Twilight began.

"Excuse me?" Peter interrupted in an offended tone.

"Secondly I'll ask you what I want bubba, now how are you with parties?" she continued without stopping.

"B-Bubba? Whatever, I'm usually terrible at them because someone always beats me up, why?"

"Because you're being invited to one, come meet Harry and I at the Armani Emporium, we're getting you a suit" Twilight said.

"What if I don't want to come?" Peter asked slowly.

"Cadance will be there" Twilight said, her tone obviously suggesting bait.

"Why would that matter?" Peter asked in confusion.

"Don't try to pull one over on me Peter, I've seen the way you look at her" Twilight chuckled.

"Whatever Twilight, where's the Armani store again?" Peter sighed.

"Broadway" was all she said before hanging up.

"Broadway is a huge street-" Peter growled but she had already gone "Fuck it, I'll find it somehow"


Harry and Twilight sat around a table holding cups of coffee in their hands, simply talking. Harry wore a white shirt underneath a sport suit jacket and black pants with black moccasins on his feet. Twilight wore a short purple skirt with a black turtle neck and a black beret cocker up on her head.

"Is Peter going to get here soon or what?" Harry asked "We called him twenty minutes ago"

"Harry, Peter lives in Queens, that's not even on the island remember?" Twilight asked.

"Oh shit, yeah, I forgot about that" Harry said blankly.

"GG buddy" Twilight nodded. There was a quiet whipping noise behind them and Peter surged forward between the two of them with heavy breath.

"Alright... what are we doing?" he asked.

"Shopping!2 Twilight exclaimed happily, jumping up onto her high-heeled black leather boots and walking forward "Let's go, we've got people to meet"

"People?" the two boys asked, looking at each other with terrified expressions "Oh great"

"Well, I've got people to meet, you two can go hang out down by the video games stores if you want" Twilight said before checking her phone, an angry expression on her face all of a sudden "Or we can get a car to the Hudson River where they've moved to"

"Who is they?" Harry asked.

"You'll find out when we get there" Twilight said "Let's go!"

While Twilight stayed up on the borders of the river the two boys had gone down to the banks and had begun skimming stones on the water.

"Who do you think we're going to meet anyway?" Harry asked after a few skims.

"I don't know, but my Batman detective skills are saying that it's gonna be someone we've never met before and someone important" Peter guessed.

"Do you think it's one of Twilight's friends?" harry asked, cursing as his skim failed to get more than three "We used to be really good at this"

"It's all in the wrist pal" Peter said, taking off his thick, black pea-coat and setting it down on his bag. He rolled up the sleeves of his cashmere blue jumped and cocked back his wrist before hucking out onto the water. The rock hit the water with incredible force and sounded like a bullet whizzing past as it skipped off down the river and out of sight.

"Fuck me dude, that was incredible" Harry whistled "How did you do that?"

"Hours upon hours of self-pitying masturbation in the corner" Peter said with a grin.

"Oh fuck you" Harry laughed, both of them enjoying their dirty and childish senses of humour "I'm supposed to be running a multi-billion dollar science corporation in three years and I'm sat here laughing at jerk-off jokes"

"Guys!" Twilight called from the railings "They're here!"

"Well, roll out the red carpet" Peter shrugged to his friend "Our VIP's are here" As Harry cautiously made his way up the rocky path to the railings and gingerly climbed over Peter stayed down by the river for a few seconds before picking up his coat, sliding his arms into it and fastening it up again. He slung his back over his shoulder and hopped gracefully from one rock to the next before placing a hand on the railing and vaulting over it with ease. He dropped low as he landed and looked at Twilight, who gestured with her eyes to look over to the left. Cocking an eyebrow he surveyed the scene before his eyes fell onto the figures Twilight meant.

"Holy shit" Peter thought, trying his best to stop his face from going slack. Stood in front of him were two women who made Cadance look like the Plain Jane of the royal family. The first one he spotted getting out of the car was the six foot two, blue haired goddess who he presumed was Luna. She wore a pair of short heeled shoes with tight, black pants and a silk blue shirt with a bow tied underneath her neck. Her fringe was combed perfectly just above her gorgeous blue eyes with her slender, feminine features complimenting her blemish-less face. The door to the car swung open and revealed another woman that put Luna to shame. Standing at a gargantuan six foot five was the corwn princess that everyone knew; Princess Celestia. She wore a pair of knee high white leather boots with two lock-on straps, her tight black pants tucked into the boots with a gripping, white pea-coat much like Peter's but made of a much finer material. The collar of the jacket reached just above her soft jawline, her cheeks untouched by make-up but having a natural finesse to them unseen with normal women. Much like her sister, her cheeks were sharp and long with her beautiful eyes being an almost glowing ice blue, like one shade of her thick and styled hair. She tucked a lock of her fine hair behind her ear as her eyes landed on Twilight. As the two of them walked over to the children it was clear who was the most feminine of the siblings. Luna was a thinner-figured woman of a darker skin colour with a soldier-esque walk with swinging arms and her head forward.

"Dibs?" Peter asked his friend, looking at him from the corner of his eye.

"That's not even funny Pete" Harry said shrugged "But I'm calling dibs on Luna"

"Fair enough" Peter shrugged, stuffing his hands in his pockets.

Celestia, unlike her sister, was a much wider woman, with a pair of large hips, strong legs and a bust much larger than either Cadance's or Luna's. It was clear out of their family who took more after mother and father, with Celestia appearing as the universal idea of perfection for a mother, while Luna looked, despite her female beauty, and acted more like a stern father.

"Twilight!" Celestia exclaimed happily, hugging the much smaller girl happily. Luna stopped next to her sister and sized up the two young men before her. Peter could tell from her discontented look that she approved of neither of them. Celestia let go of Twilight and looked at the other two.

"Now let me try and guess which one is which" Celestia said, folding her arms and looking back and forth between them "Twilight described Harry as a level-headed, intelligent looking and, I quote 'and absolutely gorgeous example of male perfection with brilliant hair and gorgeous eyes'... so my guess is..." Celestia lifted a soft hand and pointed at Peter with a well-manicured nail.

"You must be Harry Osborn?" she asked, despite her calm sense Peter could see a faint edge of nervousness in her eyes.

"I can be whoever you want me to be" Peter said with a small smile.

"Peter..." Twilight said in a horrified, waiting for the Princess's response.

"I-I'm really sorry for my friend's idiocy, he's really not used to talking to people" Harry jumped in quickly "Please do not be offended"

"Harry" Twilight said "Don't get involved, just let them sort this out"

"Do you think you're funny young man?" Luna asked dryly.

"No" Peter responded simply "I think I'm downright hilarious" Luna ground her teeth loudly, shooting an angry look at Peter who stood his ground, not dropping her gaze. Luna walked over to him slowly and sized him up with a scoff.

"Do you really expect to intimidate me with your height?" Luna asked.

"It's not the size that matters, it's how you use it" Peter responded.

"And I'm sure you're very good at making do with... sub-par equipment" Luna bit back.

"Ooh" Peter said, cocking an eyebrow with a smirk.

"Is that supposed to be cute?" Luna asked.

"Yeah, my Aunt tells me I'll be quite the little James Dean" Peter nodded.

"What? That you can be a teen heart-throb for millions of women across the country?" Luna asked in disbelief.

"No, that I'm going to die horribly in a car crash by the time I'm twenty four" Peter said quickly before shrugging "My Aunt May doesn't like me very much" Luna stared at him for a longer moment before Peter grinned again and spoke up.

"You've got gorgeous eyes" he said. Luna shook her head with a small smile, turning around and walking over to a table.

"There, she smiled" Peter said, his eyes lighting up "I'm off the hook"

"Are... are you acting arrogant on purpose?" Celestia asked, sounding slightly hurt.

"Nope... in fact the second you turn around I'm going to curl up into a ball and cry my eyes out because I am terrified right now" Peter admitted, his voice cracking on the last word. Celestia looked at him for a brief second before a soft smile broke on her soft lips, giving him a look of forgiveness.

"It's OK young man, there's no reason to be scared of us" Celestia said quietly.

"You, sure there's not" Peter said before nodding at Luna "Her, there's plenty reason to be... oh my God I'm doing it again!" With that Peter spun around and leaped over the railing, skidding down the rocks and walking back onto the banks of the Hudson. Celestia blinked in confusion before turning to Twilight with her mouth slightly open.

"Is... is he usually like that?" she asked slowly.

"Sometimes" Harry answered "He's been like that ever since he was young, it's a defence mechanism he developed when he was eight"

"Defence... mechanism?" Celestia questioned "Defence from what?"

"Peter's been bullied ever since he was little, being smart, wearing glasses, not being very social, the usual things that make kids a target" Harry explained "He found that if he made jokes in front of the bullies they'd get angry and beat him up quicker so they'd leave him alone" Celestia's face softened into an expression of pity, looking down at the river bank where Peter sat, elbows on his knees and a hand to his face.

"Is he going to come back?" Celestia asked.

"He needs a little time to adjust to you, as bad as that sounds, he'll come around soon enough" Harry said before holding out his hand "I'm Harry Osborn"

"Nice to meet you... and I'm sorry for confusing you and Peter" Celestia said with a nervous chuckle.

"It's alright, the kid needs a confidence boost as it is" Harry shrugged "It's an honour to meet you"

"Thank you Mister Osborn" Celestia smiled.

"I'm gonna go talk to Peter" Twilight said, rolling her neck and taking a deep breath.

"Twilight, Dear... do you mind if I talk to him?" Celestia asked.

"Uhhh, no, go right ahead Princess" Twilight said, gesturing towards Peter. Celestia made her way down to the shore where Peter sat gazing out onto the water, seeing seagulls and other birds flying over the surface of the river. Peter heard the Princess approaching and he turned his head to look at her.

"You're not going to execute me are you?" Peter asked.

"Of course not" Celestia chuckled "That would involve a lot of paper work and I have better things to do"

"That makes me feel great that knowing my life is worth the same to the royal family as a stack of paper" Peter sighed.

"So is everybody else's young man" Celestia added, sitting down next to him, close enough for him to feel the heat from her body, causing Peter's heart rate to increase "When you run a country, the public is no longer a group of individuals, they become nothing more than tax reports and yearly revenue percentages, statistics with no face and no life"

"Wow... that's depressing" Peter stated.

"It is... but after doing it for as long as I have you get used to it" Celestia hummed, picking up a smooth rock and rubbing it with the flat of her thumb.

"Is twenty years enough to get used to being removed from humanity and worshipped as a Goddess?" Peter asked. Celestia then made a noise that greatly surprised Peter: she laughed. Her laugh was a harmonic and beautiful tone that rang through Peter's entire being, but it caught him off-guard nonetheless.

"What?" Peter asked.

"Young man, I've been doing this a lot longer than twenty years" she smiled.

"What... were you made ruler when you were ten?" Peter asked.

"How old do you think I am Peter?" Celestia asked, leaning back with her hands behind her, showing off her curvy figure.

"I... late... thirties?" Peter guessed, shooting blindly.

"And another question, do you know what nationality I am?" she asked. Peter studied her briefly, but she had since put on a blank expression to keep him from finding a flaw in her questions, or a flaw in her beauty for that matter.

"American, right?" Peter asked.

"No, I'm Egyptian" she corrected.

"What does that have to do with your age?" Peter asked, trying to connect lines that weren't there.

"Ancient Egyptian" she added.

And then the strands connected.

"No way..." Peter said, recoiling in disbelief "No human is that old"

"Strictly speaking, I'm not a normal human, neither is Luna or Cadance" Celestia continued. Peter scrambled for an answer, something logical to hold that wasn't aliens or zombies, beautiful zombies. Then he remembered what Cadance had said in the hospital.

"Gene type... you're mutants, aren't you?" Peter asked.

"Very well done young man, not many people figure that out as quickly as you do" Celestia said before looking Peter in the eyes "You're not one of those people who are against mutants, are you?"

"I... don't really think I'm in the position to criticise or dislike mutants" Peter said, choosing his words carefully "You're not a member of the X-Men are you?"

"God no Peter" Celestia said, tutting loudly "I haven't used my powers for combat in over six hundred years"

"Do most people know you're a mutant?" Peter asked.

"They know I have some kind of genetic advantage, but not many people call me or my family mutants" Celestia answered "They're not aware of the full extent of my mutation"

"So why are you telling me this?" Peter asked in a puzzled tone. Celestia opened her mouth to answer but found that she had no response. She pursed her lips and looked out onto the lake before speaking again.

"I'm not... really sure to be completely honest, you seem like a trustworthy and level-headed person" Celestia said "And I hardly doubt that even if you are revolted by me, I don't think one man can turn my country against me"

"No offence meant, but my Uncle Ben used to tell me that all it takes to make a change is right man and the right room" Peter said quietly.

"Your uncle sounds like a wise man Peter" Celestia smiled "That's a very profound sentence if you ask me, did he share any other pieces of wisdom with you?"

"Yeah, just one more" Peter nodded, standing up straight after picking a stone from the riverbank.

"Which was?"

"With great power, comes great responsibility" Peter said, a shiver running down his spine as he said the sentence aloud once again. He cocked his arm back and threw the stone, the bullet-like bouncing sound becoming further and further away as the stone travelled down the river and out of sight.

"Extremely impressive Peter, is that strength just in your arm or can your hand match that power?" Celestia asked.

"In both of them, arm and fingers" Peter nodded.

"Ooh... I'll remember that for when you're older"

With that, Celestia stood up and walked back up to the railings and joined the rest of them. Peter blinked several times as he pondered her statement before the realization socked him in the jaw. He looked down at his hand and twitched his fingers, heart leaping into his mouth. He cracked a wide smile before turning around and sprinting back up to the others so they could carry on with their daily plan.


"Boss" the thick Manhattan accent said "We got word that Armour's not backing down from the case, should we call the Enforcers to deal with him?"

"Don't worry yourself with Mr Armour, he'll learn soon enough, for now we have a new target, the lovely Princess's recovery ball, where there shall be many wealthy individuals and heads of important companies seeking to earn the favour of the Royal Family" the deep voice said.

"So... we send a few of the guys in and snatch their wallets and bank info before making a quick exit?" the accent suggested.

"Exactly..." the boss chuckled.

"I'll get on that Boss" the accent grunted.

"Hold on for a moment" the boss added "Make sure Marco isn't there Hammerhead"

"Yes Boss" Hammerhead nodded, walking out of the dimly-lit penthouse.


"Have you found something you liked yet Peter?" Twilight called from outside the changing area.

"I think so..." Peter muttered "But I'm not sure about it"

"If you even suggest another search I'm going to strangle you with you tie" she growled.

"I think I like this one" Peter said quickly after a moment of silence "But..." Twilight growled angrily, rocketing out of her seat and barging into the hallway with the small booths.

"Which one are you in?" she asked, forcing herself to sound patient.

"The fourth one of the left but-" Peter said but before he could even finish his sentence Twilight had ducked into the booth and slammed the wooden door behind her.

"If this isn't import I'm gonna-" Twilight attempted to threaten before her eyes fell down onto Peter's torso, locking on to something she'd never seen before. Her words caught in her throat as her eyes widened in shock, realizing two things; the first being that Peter was wearing nothing but his boxers, which seemed a little on the small side, she hoped, and that there was not enough room in the booth for the two of them.

"Ummm..." Peter said, scratching the back of his head awkwardly, but by performing this action Twilight was given full view of Peter's tensed arm. She covered her eyes with her arm and turned away, her cheeks a boiling red as she remained unable to speak.

"What are you doing?" Peter asked.

"Why do you look like that?" Twilight asked quietly.

"Look like what?" Peter responded in confusion "Is there something on my face?"

"No, no... why is your body like that?" Twilight stammered.

"Because I work out a lot" Peter said in an obvious tone.

"Can you put your shirt on, please?" Twilight begged, kneading her hands anxiously, her sleeves covering to the middle of them.

"That's the problem, I'm terrible with buttons, especially fancy ones" Peter said "Can you help me?"

"No" Twilight squeaked, her face on fire and still unable to look at him.

"Then I'm just going to stand here like this for longer Twilight" Peter sighed.

"Alright... I'll help" Twilight nodded. As Peter pulled the white shirt over his body Twilight could see each muscle in his arms and abdomen move and flex. Her stomach nearly erupted butterflies as she reached down to tie the first few buttons, trying her best to keep her eyes on his face but finding herself unable to fasten the buttons efficiently so she had to look at his body.

"Will you hurry up?" Peter asked impatiently.

"I'm trying my best here Peter!" Twilight hissed "You're not making this any easier"

"I'm not doing anything" Peter snapped. Twilight reached his top button, fastening it quickly and attempting to flatten his collar before her desire got the better of her. She grabbed hold of Peter's collar and stood on her toes, pulling him forward and kissing him, pushing her tongue past his lips and squeezing her eyes shut.

"Spider-Sense?" Peter asked himself. The kiss lasted no longer than seven seconds before Twilight pulled away, the two of them staring at each other with stunned expressions before Twilight shook her head and quickly abandoned the booth, leaving Peter standing there half dressed and extremely confused.

Twilight splashed her face with the freezing water, trying her best to cool her cheeks down before she went back outside to meet the others. She knew that she'd just created a void between herself and Harry and had just fashioned a link between her and Peter in a way she never wanted. She couldn't help herself, she just had to. She wasn't going to lie to herself, what she had done was wrong and immoral, she'd kissed a man that wasn't hers outside of the relationship she was in, and the thought disgusted her. But the action had excited her, given her an adrenaline rush like nothing before and probably nothing she'd feel again. She took her hat off, tucked her hair back and dunked her head into the sink full of freezing water. There came a knock at the bathroom door and Cadance's voice came from the other side.

"You OK Twilight, Celestia said you'd been in here for nearly ten minutes now" Cadance called.

"When did you get here Cadance?" Twilight asked.

"A few minutes ago, are you alright?" she repeated.

"Can... can we talk about something?" Twilight asked.

"Sure, what is it?" Cadance confirmed. Twilight unlocked the bathroom door and allowed Cadance inside. When she saw the state Twilight was in she became concerned, closing the door and locking it behind her.

"What's wrong Twi?" Cadance asked.

"It's... it's about Peter" Twilight said, crossing her arms and leaning against the wall.

"What about him... he didn't do anything to you did he?" Cadance asked in an alarmed tone.

"No, it was the other way around" Twilight admitted "I kissed him" Cadance was speechless for a long second, forcing herself to close her mouth before speaking.

"You have a boyfriend, Twi" Cadance hissed.

"I know, I know!" Twilight snapped "And that's what disgusts me, I kissed him and I'm the one in a relationship, I cheated on Harry with him"

"Hold on, you only kissed him, the two of you never had sex, so I wouldn't call it cheating" Cadance interjected.

"Then what would you call it?!" Twilight demanded.

"I'd call it a lapse in judgement and a mistake that will never happen again, right?" Cadance asked, leaning closer to Twilight with a glare in her eyes "Right?"

"I don't know" Twilight mumbled, putting her face in her hands and exhaling loudly.

"Now this isn't right" Cadance said, grabbing hold of Twilight's arm "Never play with yours or their emotions like this, you pick one or tell them both to fuck off. But you never mess people around"

"You're right" Twilight sighed, drying her face on her sleeve and placing her hat back on "This was a mistake, I'll tell Peter I'm sorry and it'll never happen again"

"Damn right" Cadance said, letting go of Twilight's arm "Now, composure girl, face the public with a smile" The two girls gave each other their best fake smiles before nodding. They left the bathroom and closed the door, ignoring the excited look they got from an early twenty year old man.

"What took you two so long?" Harry asked, using his black sleeve to wipe away a scuff mark on his black wing-tips.

"Make-up emergency" Cadance lied before changing the subject "Nice suit Harry"

"Thanks, I went for the typical Osborn colour motif, black and green" Harry said. True to his word he'd selected a jet black suit with a shine to it and an emerald green shirt underneath with a matching tie, topped off with green steel cuff links.

"And if I remember correctly we get a custom made set of glasses that match the suit we buy this season" Harry commented, taking his phone out of the already-purchased suit.

"Indeed we do" Peter said from across the room. They turned to see Peter with a thumb in his belt loop of a deep blue suit with a pristine white shirt with a skinny deep red tie. He'd fastened one of the buttons on his jacket and none others. His hair had been thickened up by a stylist and given a much mores stylized quiff with several strands bent, curved and made to look more natural and product free. On his face was a pair of reflective blue aviators that matched the colour of his suit. To switch up the eras of the suit he had chosen to wear a pair of deep red converses with the laces tucked in, brand new and pristine. The two friends looked at each other before grinning at one another.

"We're going to be competing at this shindig aren't we?" Peter asked.

"Not at all, because anyone who uses the word 'shindig' deserves no women" Harry smirked, crossing his arms.

"Oh yeah, I remember that joke, I think I wrote that down" Peter said, reaching into his pocket "I've got it right here-" Peter yanked his hand out of his pocket with his middle finger up and his thumb stretched out.

"Boom" he said, rolling his head back before moving, skidding his further-behind left leg a few inches forward before stepping onto his right foot.

"Oh, he's a big man now that he's wearing a suit?" Harry asked jokingly. Peter pivoted on his heel and began to moonwalk over to Harry with his hands in his pockets.

"Bruh, you just jealous of mah moves" Peter chuckled, clicking his tongue before beginning to moonwalk circles around Harry, humming 'Smooth Criminal' as he did so.

"Are we all done now?" one of the store attendants asked.

"Indeed we are" Harry nodded, taking out his wallet and removing his debit card "To the counter?"

"Na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na!" Peter said as he walked back into the booth and began to change back into his regular clothing.

"I hate him sometimes" Harry sighed "Peter, you can keep the suit on, we can get them dry cleaned for tomorrow!" With that Peter moonwalked back out of the booth, pulling his jacket back on whilst beat-boxing.

"Oh for..." Harry said, walking over to the counter with the store attendant.


Harry sat in his chair next to Twilight at the table they all sat around, Peter having ducked off a few minutes earlier, and as such the royal sisters hadn't seen Peter in his suit.

"I love the green on that Harry, very dark and very pronounced" Celestia commented, her illuminating eyes gleaming happily, seeming glad to be around common people for once.

"What did Parker get?" Luna asked, slowly nursing a glass of gin.

"Oh Aunt Luna, it looked great, brilliant colour combination, great wearing style and it fit him really well" Cadance said.

"Cadance Dear, calm down, it's only a suit" Celestia chuckled "I know you're a fashion designer but honestly"

"Sorry Aunt Celestia" Cadance smirked.

"Whoa!" they heard Peter's voice exclaim. They turned quickly to see Peter having caught a woman a few years older than him who had tripped. With a few brief movements of his hand he caught all of the items she'd flung into the air on a dinner tray. He stood her back up and handed her the tray back with a smile.

"Wow... thank you" she said, her friends looking at her with amazement.

"No problem, just try to be more careful because I'm not always gonna be here to catch you" Peter advised.

"Sadly" she pouted, giving him a very playful look. Peter clicked his tongue with a wink before taking his arm away from the attractive woman and walking away. Twilight watched the reactions of the other women she walked over to, the lot of them cooing like pigeons, tightly gripping her glass and chewing on an ice cube.

"Hey" Peter said, grabbing a chair and sitting down on it sideways, resting his arms on his knees and linking his fingers.

"Very smooth Peter" Harry commented.

"Thanks, I'd love to see their reaction if they found out I'm only fifteen" Peter chuckled. There was a loud choking sound and Peter turned to see Luna slam her glass onto the table while straining to swallow the last gulp she'd taken.

"You're only fifteen?" she demanded.

"Yeah... you mean Twilight never told you that?" Peter asked, looking at Celestia who also seemed caught off guard-by this revelation.

"No... I thought you were approaching your eighteenth at least" Celestia said with a shake of her head "Why didn't you inform us of that Twilight?"

"I, I thought you'd just have guessed he was my age" Twilight shrugged.

"Eh, no harm no foul, it's not like either of you tried to French me in a cupboard or anything" Peter said, taking an unopened bottle of Pepsi Max from the table and twisting the cap off. Twilight lowered her head slightly to hide the red tinge that came to her cheeks as Peter, unintentionally, brought up the event.

"So, are we all going to get a good night's sleep for the party tomorrow?" Peter asked.

"I should hope so" Celestia nodded "I need to be at my full energy level because I'm usually unconscious after three glasses of wine"

"Light-weight" Luna mumbled under a smile, causing her sister to roll her eyes.


Peter sat on his bed, having shaved off the bum-fluff moustache he'd been growing recently and having styled his head as best as possible. He had an hour to get ready for the party before he was picked up by Harry's limo. He opened his cupboard and reached for his party suit before another red and blue item caught his attention. The once-plain ski suit had been modified into a web-patterned, spider-symbol displayer of supreme justice, as Peter liked to call it. Debating whether to take the suit with him in his backpack before he realized how stupid and suspicious it would look for him to be carrying a bag around whilst at a dinner party.

"I'll just wear it underneath my other suit" he shrugged, pulling the Spider-Suit out of the cupboard and pulling it on, stuffing the extremely thin-yet-strong and flexible boots and gloves into his jacket pocket before pulling his other suit on, trying his best tie up the buttons on his own. He fastened his tie around his neck and pulled on the jacket, not looking as good as he had done in the store but he didn't mind. He smiled at himself in the mirror and pulled on the converses he'd bought before stuffing his wallet and his phone into his pockets, filling up his web-shooters and awkwardly putting them his wrists, which he'd forgotten to do before.

"Alright, here's to hoping we don't need to use any of the superhero stuff" Peter hummed, walking down the stairs and sitting down to watch some TV.


Peter's anxiety about social situations had him constantly checking over his shoulder for something to go wrong as he sat at a table with Twilight, Harry and her family sitting on the other side. Peter kept tapping his finger on his wrist where his web-shooters were hidden, his Spider-Sense having been lightly buzzing all night.

"Peter!" Harry called to him over the music "Just relax man"

"I wish I could but this ain't my scene remember?" Peter sighed, drumming on his lap.

"Then make it yours, get a drink, socialize with someone, there are other kids here our age you know?" Harry suggested.

"Yeah, a load of gorgeous millionaire heiresses who only have the fact they're human in common with me, that'll go over brilliantly" Peter said anxiously "I already said that I wasn't good at this sort of stuff, it's too loud anyway"

"Then go up to the balcony, there are smokers up there but it's a damn sight quieter" Harry said. Peter nodded before pushing himself out from under the table and straightening his jacket.

"I'll see you in a while guys" Peter nodded.

"Just be back in time for Celestia's 'few words'" Twilight called out.

"That'll be a thing?" Peter asked.

"Trust me, it will be" Twilight nodded. Peter shrugged his shoulders and weaved his way through the crowd, noting several larger men who didn't exactly look in the party mood. Peter pushed open the door to the balcony just as that started playing swingin' sixties music.

"Aunt May totally should've been here, she loves sixties music" Peter mumbled to himself. He walked over to the edge of the balcony and looked over the edge, seeing the traffic of the New York streets light up the night along with the bright buildings of all colours and shades. Peter's ear twitched as he heard the click of a high heel behind him. He turned around to see Princess Celestia standing behind, looking as gorgeous as ever. She wore a well-covering dress with cotton sleeves, patterns of flowers on the arms below the shoulder with a loop of silk going around the middle finger of each hand to hold down the arrow-shaped sleeves that reached down the backs of her hands. The dress was extremely slim-fitting, mapping each of her luscious curves better than most experienced cartographers, her bra and dress having to work to support her bust with the collar of the dress's collar covering her neck with more flower patterns. She placed a hand on her hip and smiled gently at him, her eyes gleaming once more.

"Ho-lee Fuck Peter thought to himself, feeling his heart rate increase once more.

"Hello young man, are you enjoying yourself?" she asked in her sing-song voice.

"At the risk of sounding like a jerk... not really, I'm a little too timid for the high life" Peter admitted. Celestia walked forwards, Peter's eyes glued to the motion of her swaying hips, before she leaned against the railings.

"I can understand that, I know young men like yourself go quite blind when they begin to stargaze" Celestia nodded, sipping from the wine glass she held in her tender grip, stroking the stem with the tip of her finger absent-mindedly as she spoke.

"Yeah, I just don't feel like I'm cut out for this kind of thing, loud music, alcohol, rich and famous friends" Peter mumbled "It's just not for me"

"It's not for everyone Peter, you're right, I'm sorry that we forced you to come here tonight" Celestia sighed, revealing to him how tired she appeared, her eyes dimming and her smile dropping.

"Hey, what's wrong Princess?" Peter asked.

"Nothing Peter, I'm just a down tonight" Celestia mumbled, taking one last sip from her wine glass before throwing the contents over the balcony. Peter looked over the edge and raised an eyebrow.

"Well, I hope that washes out" he shrugged, looking at the increasingly deflated Celestia "Is there anything I can do to help?" Celestia didn't answer him, she merely turned her head over her right shoulder to avoid his gaze. Peter rolled his eyes, slinging himself over the edge of the railings and grabbing hold, hanging back and using the friction caused by weight distribution to stay standing instead of his adhesive powers. He repeatedly swapped the arms he was using to grip the rail, the sound of him slapping metal getting Celestia's attention again.

"Peter?!" she exclaimed, lashing out and grabbing hold of his arm "What are you doing?"

"Just messing around" he shrugged, pulling himself forward and completely letting go of the railing, using the tips of his toes and his balance to stop himself from falling to his death "You don't have to-" Peter stopped speaking as soon as he heard a loud beeping noise on the roof. He looked up at the old architecture that he could easily climb without sticking. Hey, Celestia needed an adrenaline rush and this would give her a jolt. He pulled his arm away and leaped from the balcony to old griffon carving hanging over the city.

"Peter, please, come back here now" Celestia said, a look of terror on her face.

"I'll be there in a minute" Peter shrugged "There's something else up here, stay there and I'll take a look" Celestia appeared beside herself with worry, looking around for anyone else to help her. Peter slowly parkoured his way up to the neck of the griffon where the handhold was its mouth but he had nowhere else to grab hold of.

"Peter. Now" Celestia said sternly, pointing at the ground.

"Gimme a minute here" Peter chuckled "We'll talk when I get back" Celestia followed Peter's gaze to figure out what he was going to do before the realization hit her.

"Peter!" she yelled, leaning over the balcony and holding her hand out "Just jump back and I swear I'll catch you" Peter ignored her request and threw himself away from the griffon, looking down at the city beneath him, before he swung his hand forward and his fingers locked into the mouth of the griffon. He quickly pulled himself up and crouched on the griffon's head.

"See?" peter asked "No problem?"

"Fine, now please just jump back here" Celestia said, tightly gripping the railings.

"Two minutes" peter said, gesturing for the number two as he stood up straight and walked up the griffon and up to the top of the building. The beeping continued to get louder as he approached it. The item making the noise was a small black box with a lid on it. Raising an eyebrow Peter crouched down and placed his hand on the box, ignoring the sound of a helicopter circling nearby, as he used his adhesive powers to wrench the top of the box off it.

What he saw nearly gave him a heart attack

There was nearly four pounds of plastic explosive wired up to a timer that had seven seconds left in red numbers.

"Breaching charges!" Peter roared, throwing himself down off the roof and back onto the now-deserted balcony, save for Celestia.

"Peter, what are you-" she began only to be cut off by Peter grabbing her by the waist. He dived forward and pushed her through the doors back into the party, locking it and punching the handle off, keeping her safe from the explosives. He threw himself off, sticking to the side of the building as several explosions shook the whole building to the core.

"There was more than one of them?" Peter exclaimed "They were breaching charges... and I just threw Celestia back in?!" He slammed his head off the wall out of self-hate before turning over onto his back, seeing the helicopter fly above the building and begin to deposit armed, armoured men into the ballroom.

"Oh fuck..." Peter sighed, peeking over the rooftop to see the helicopter deposit the last few men and quickly fly away. He jumped back onto the balcony, his mind racing on what to do. Fear clenched his heart as he put his hands to his face, his breathing heavy and ragged.

"What do I do?" peter asked himself, placing a hand to his chest to feel his heart before remembering what he was wearing. After using his Spider-Sense to check for any observers he tore off his suit and revealed his Spider-Suit, ready and prepped for action.

"Alright Parker... Hero Time" Peter muttered, suiting up fully before pulling the mask over his face.


Twilight was roughly forced to her knees and had her hand bound behind her with zip ties, just like everybody else in the room. The attack had happened before they'd even seen the danger and anyone who had attempted to fight back was killed and looted, first come first serve style. So far there were thirteen bloody corpses on the floor and sobbing came from the wives and daughters of those dead, mostly men murdered whereas the women who resisted were dragged off to be beaten, raped and murdered. Blood trickled down through Twilight's hair in the spot she'd been whipped with the gun and a heavy boot was pressed on her back, compressing her chest and making it harder to breathe.

"Alright people, this is gonna be done quick and easy OK, nobody fucks up and nobody gets hurt" a large man said in a deep, English accent "But you try to bust a move and-" He aimed his shotgun at a large window pane and fired, the pellets shattering the window pane with a loud smash, raining glass down on a few unfortunate hostages. One of the men seemed to notice Shining for the first time and clapped his friends on the shoulder.

"Hey buddy, we've missed you Armour, is this your family?" a man asked before cocking his foot back and kicking Shining in the face, blood whipping to the side "Grab his bitch, his sister and his mother... enough for the three of us to enjoy, swap and share" Twilight was grabbed by the hair and had the barrel of a gun pushed into her cheek bones.

"I like your dress" the man said in an intelligence-lacking voice "I'd like it better off"

"Fuck you cunt" Twilight spat. Lights exploded in her eyes as she was punched in the face for her comment, her cheek beginning to sting painfully.

"Watch your mouth bitch or I'll fill it with bullets" he growled.

"Uhhh, excuse me!?" a cocky voice yelled from what sounded like the window "Can I come in this way or do I have to break my own window?" There was a quick flash of red and blue before a man dressed in a spider-themes red and blue spandex suit stood with his arms down by his side. There came a hush over the crowd as they all watched what this mystery man would do.

"Ooh... why did it go so quiet?" he asked before placing his hand to his covered mouth "Did I ruin the surprise party?"

"What the fuck... is he a cop?" one of the men asked, walking towards him with his gun drawn.

"You... you seriously think I'm a cop dressed like this?" he asked.

"He's right, cops don't dress that fuckin' stupid!" one of them yelled, getting them all to laugh loudly.

"Oh, you're insulting my threads?" he asked with a snap of his fingers "Gurl, it looks like the last heist you pulled off was at the Goodwill" They stopped laughing and began to slowly edge towards him, loading their weapons and aiming them.

"Alright pal, I'm gonna ask you and your faggoty-ass outfit to leave before you get hurt" one of them said, getting closer to the mystery man.

"Well since we're comparing our faggoty-ass outfits can we talk about yours for a sec, I love it" he chuckled "Did your husband make it for you?" The man roared angrily as he raised his AK and pulled the trigger. Gunshots rang out in the room and the man moved faster than humanly possible. He threw himself forward, leaping over the hail of bullets, before slamming his foot into the shooter's chest, dropping him to the floor before he spun on his extended arm, the shooter somehow sticking to his foot, and through the spin kick he knocked out another man before pivoting on his hand and scorpion-kicking the unconscious man on his foot into another man, sending them both crashing to the floor. The man then pushed off with arms, flipping forwards several times before landing in a low crouch, placing his hand on the floor and holding an arm out behind him. He stood up and looked around, rubbing the back of his head before chuckling.

"Oops, did I do that?" he asked in an Urkel impression. Another gunman snuck up behind the man in the suit with a knife in his hand, lunging for the costumed man silently. The man in the suit dodged to the side and clipped the attacker on the cheek with his toe, causing him to spin around briefly.

"Alright buddy, we'll do this fairly" the man said, balling his fists put facing his fingers towards his attacker "Put em up!" The assailant rushed at the costumed man and began to slash wildly, yelling each time he did so.

"I tell you what, since you're dancing... can I sing?" the costumed man asked excitedly "OK I'll start, slide to the left! He did as he said, sliding his foot over to the left to dodge a slash of the knife.

"Slide to the right!" he yelled, skidding right "Criss-cross!" With the last yell he unleashed a flurry of punches, the last one sending the man flying backwards.

"Cha-Cha real smooth" he sang, moonwalking away from that single fight.

"Scissor!" two men yelled, sprinting towards him for a scissor movement.

"Rock!" the costumed man yelled, leaping above the two of them and landing on the other side "Did I win?" He repeated the jumping movement to dodge their attacks two times before the two of them learned what he was doing. The third time they feigned their attack before whipping around as soon as he jumped up but to their surprise he wasn't there.

"The fuck?" one of them questioned.

"Romeo, Romeo, where for art thou Romeo?" the costumed man called from the chandelier above them, leaning on a large crystal spike on the ornament whilst holding the back his hand against head.

"What are you doing up there?" one of them demanded.

"Staying away from you" he laughed "And no, I'm not putting the ladder down, this is my tree-house and if you guys don't go away I'm telling Mom!"

"Brucie!" one of them yelled "Get this fucker down!" At the order a huge man walked forwards with an LMG and a grin on his face.

"See, this is why we need stricter gun laws, for shit like this!" the man in the mask exclaimed, throwing himself down, knocking out the other two with a double-kick before bouncing off his hands and throwing himself up to the higher stand the man with the LMG stood. He held down the trigger and screamed as shot after shot missed the man in the suit, ripping holes in the carpet and walls. As he dodged around the room he continued to crack jokes.

"I'd never use a gun of that size, it's overkill, it's unnecessary and besides-" he said, landing just in front of the man as he ran out of ammo "I don't think I'd want to announce to the world I've got a small dick" The man threw the LMG to the side and reached into his back pocket, rummaging around for something.

"Oh hurry up, the suspense is killing me!" the man yelled, bouncing from foot to foot. The large man pulled a butterfly knife and held it down to his right side.

"Oh God, oh no" the costumed man said "Is that a little knife?"

"Yeah" the man growled in an Albanian accent "Now hold still"

"Oh no, you've found my weakness, it's... little knives!" the costumed man exclaimed, crouching down and cowering in fear, with standing up straight with a scoff and lashing his hand forward. A loud thwip was heard and a glob of white fluid launched the attacker's hand backwards and stuck it to the wall.

"What the fuck... what is this shit man!?" he begged, trying to pull his hand away.

"Oh it's nothing important, just a little design I came up with when I bored of jerking it" he said, pointing at his wrist before dragging his finger through the air back to the white fluid "Or it might be what I made while jerking it, I forget really"

"That's fucking sick, you're fucking sick!" he yelled. The man lashed his hand forward again and more of the white fluid stuck the man's arms legs and head to the wall.

"I know I'm sick, sicker than ill, ready to spill and going in for the kill" he said, throwing out hand signs.

"Is he fucking freestyling right now!?" another voice demanded from across the room "Who the fuck is this cunt!?"

"Hey!" the man yelled, throwing himself across the room and into a circle of armed thugs "Do you kiss your mother with that mouth?" The man then seemed to realize what he'd jumped into, crossing his arms and nodding.

"So... is this the circle jerk I signed up for or is that next door?" he asked cockily.

"I swear to God, if you make one more joke I will gut you" the taller man growled.

"OK, I'll stop... no wait, one more joke-!" he said whirling around and punching the man out quickly "Your dick, oh I'm one fire!"

"Waste him!" one of them yelled. The man used a string of the white fluid to yank the legs out from one of the shooters, pulling them over to him and using him as a bullet shield before throwing him at another assailant before leaping leaping high into the air.

"Check the chandelier!" a man yelled. They all turned to the chandelier but were surprised to see it was empty. There was a faint stretching sound and the costumed man lowered himself next to one of the gunmen before speaking.

"Psst... what's the answer to question number seven?" he asked.

"What?" the man said, turning around only to be punched out by the costumed man. The others turned around on him and aimed their guns at him.

"Oh nice going Tim, now the teacher knows I'm cheating!" he yelled at the unconscious man on the floor.

"Fire!" another yelled. The man dropped down flat onto the floor, avoiding the gunfire easily before beginning to weave his way through them and pick them off one by one, like a spider with its prey he nimbly knocked, webbed and threw all of them until they stopped getting up. He landed in the same low crouch he had before and surveyed the room.

"Is that it?" he asked loudly "Can I go home now or do you want me to wipe the ink off the whiteboard too Mrs Danishaw?"

"Freeze fucker!" a terrified voice yelled from behind him. The costumed man turned around to see the man pointing a trembling gun at the back of Mrs Velvet's head, the two of them looking as terrified as each other.

"Alright pal... you win, you got me" the costumed man said, holding his hands up above his head in surrender "What do you want?"

"Get over here, next to her, an-and take off your mask so... so I can see your scared face when I shoot you!" he demanded.

"That took a while pal, you're new at this aren't you?" the man joked before the armed man pressed the gun harder against her head.

"Please..." Twilight whispered in a terrified tone "Please do what he says"

"OK, I'm on my way pal" the man said, grabbing the back of his mask and beginning to slowly slide it off. The costumed man seemed to delay for a brief second before he fully pulled the mask off. For everyone there was something obstructing the view of his face, they were simply at the wrong angle to see or they couldn't see past his hands around his face.

"Alright, now-" the gunman began, moving the gun away from the back of the woman's head, a mistake instantly. The unmasked man lunged forward, keeping his face low and covered with his arms before flipping over forward, just over the bullet that was fired, and slamming his heel into the man's face. He quickly flipped over and pulled the mask back onto his face before landing and standing up in a gymnastic Y formation. He turned around and pulled the zip ties off the arms of Mrs Velvet and she hugged him tightly.

"Thank you" she sobbed "Thank you so much"

"No problem Ma'am" he said with a nod before backing away from the woman and grabbing the groaning gunman by the scruff of the neck.

"You and me, let's talk" he said, dragging him over to a window before thrusting him through it, smashing through the glass and holding him out over the open air with nothing but an enormous drop beneath him "Right, you've seen Batman Begins, you know how this works, spit it out"

"Y-Yeah but Batman doesn't kill anyone" the man stammered.

"But you're forgetting" he said, pulling him closer to his face "I'm not Batman" With that he lightly tossed him out of the window, the sounds of screams fading away quickly. He leaned forward and used his webbing to catch his foot before reeling him back up.

"So, who do you work for?" he asked calmly.

"I-I can't tell you"

"Yes you can, just sound it out for me, and once you're done practising you can tell me" he chuckled.

"No way man, they'll kill me" he groaned. The masked man quickly punched him in the face twice, knocking out teeth and breaking his cheek.

"And what makes you think I won't?" he asked in a rough voice "Three seconds... two... one" He said, dropping him again. He fell further this time before he caught him, this time he swung into the wall and knocked more of his teeth out and breaking nose. He pulled him up again and didn't even have to ask him that time.

"The Big Man... I work for the Big Man!" he bellowed.

"Ah yes, the infamous crime kingpin and part time gang-bang porn star the Big Man" he said with a loud, fake laugh before grabbing the man by the throat and pulling him close "Who the fuck is the Big Man?"

"I don't know... I-I was lucky to learn that name at all, I'm not supposed to know it but one of my bosses got drunk and told me before the Big Man killed him" he sobbed "Please don't kill me!"

"Well, since you asked so nicely..." he said, knocking him out with a head butt, binding his hands and feet with webbing before walking over to the discarded butterfly knife on the floor. He threw the man down next to Shining Armour before cutting the zip ties on his wrists.

"First off, you're welcome, secondly you've got a lead and a name, this fuck-up's crime gang and the name Big Man" he said as Shining stood up, taking the butterfly knife from him when offered and beginning to cut people loose.

"Right, first off, I never thanked you, and secondly, I need your name, your real name" Shining said, cutting Cadance free and moving over to Twilight and cutting her free.

"And why is that?" he asked.

"Because I have to arrest you for obstruction of justice, multiple count of assault and one count of manslaughter" Shining said "Nothing personal of course, just police protocol"

"I see... not happening" he said, walking over to a table and grabbing a glass of Pepsi.

"Hey, that's not yours" Twilight protested "That's my friend's" The masked man looked at her before pulling his mask up to the bridge of his nose and taking a drink.

"Wow, that's rude" she scoffed.

"Calm down Twilight" he said "I'm not exactly stealing the guy's life savings"

"How do you know my name?" Twilight asked suspiciously.

"Because you're, well were, Princess Celestia's student once and the little sister of New York's police captain, you're not exactly a low profile name if you just look for it" he answered, finishing the drink before he was grabbed by the shoulders by a hysterical looking Princess Celestia.

"Did you come from the roof?" she demanded "Did you see a young man up there, your height, brown hair, blue suit?"

"What, Parker?" he asked with a chuckle "Yeah, I got the kid just before the charges went off and took him down, he'd said he'd meet you guys at the Starbucks three blocks from here, he's fine" Celestia backed away from, placing her hands to her face and sighing in relief.

"Thank God he's alright" she chuckled "I don't know what I would've done if he'd died in that explosion"

"I've gotta say buddy, you've got an amazing response time" Twilight said, eyeing him suspiciously.

"I try my best" he shrugged before throwing the glass onto the table and webbing it into place to stop it from falling over. Twilight looked at the webbing with narrowed eyes.

"A synthetic fibre, artificial, made to look like spider's webbing right?" Twilight asked "Probably stored in an air-tight, pressurised container through shear-thinning"

"I have no clue what you're on about egg-head" he said, turning and walking over to the broken window.

"Alright then buddy, who exactly are you?" Shining asked.

"You already know who I am" he said, looking over his shoulder.

"I do?" Shining asked.

"I'm Your Friendly Neighbourhood Spider-Man" he said, giving a two finger salute before sprinting forward and leaping out of the window, whooping loudly before flipping over and shooting a web onto a nearby building and swinging away.

Flat-Out Broke

Peter finished tying his right shoelace, dropping into the chair outside the coffee shop with a heavy thumping sound, getting the attention of those sat near him for a brief moment before shrugging their shoulders and paying him mind no longer. Peter straightened his tie just as a wave of police cars and helicopters arrived sped past the block, heading towards the building he had just recently left. After making sure that his Spider-Suit wasn't visible anywhere on his body he relaxed in his seat, resting his leg on his knee and leaning back with a sigh. He'd done it. He'd actually done something he'd only seen done in comic books and movies; he'd saved people from murdering, stealing crooks that worked for a crime lord who had the city's criminal underworld under his thumb. Peter's smile suddenly dropped off his face as a wave of nausea rushed over him.

"Holy shit" he muttered under his breath, wiping the sweat away from his brow with the back of his thumb "What the fuck did I just do?"

It hit him then and there that he'd just started a war on the crime lord that he'd never be able to back out of, not until he was captured or one of them was dead. Spider-Man had just placed a target on the Big Man whilst sticking on to himself and he needed to take the shot first if he wanted to stay alive. Peter was roused from his thoughts as his phone began to buzz in his pocket, sending tingles down his leg. He slipped his phone out and found out his Aunt May was calling him. He answered the call and placed the phone against his ear.

"Hello?" he spoke.

"Hey Peter, how's the party going?" May asked down the line.

"Well, for lack of a better word I'd say... explosive" Peter answered with a nervous chuckle.

"That's great to hear, you're not feeling too third-wheelish are you?" she questioned, causing Peter a great deal of confusion.

"I'm sorry?" Peter said.

"Well seeing as how your two friends are both dating, and you're not, I was wondering if you felt a bit awkward around the happy couple" she explained. Peter looked at his phone in disbelief for a long second before speaking again.

"Are you making fun of me?" he asked.

"Of course not dear, I'm just saying that it's probably time for you to go out and find yourself a girlfriend" May continued "It'll do wonders for your psyche"

"Aunt May, I'm fifteen, I hardly think that I need to settle down already" Peter said in an awkward tone.

"I never suggested getting married Peter, I just meant... getting someone to spend time with that you can be more... intimate with" May said slowly.

"Hang on a minute-" Peter said, standing up out of his chair "Aren't we getting a little ahead of ourselves?"

"I didn't mean it like that Peter, I used the wrong word... look, my friend Mrs Watson has a lovely young niece, she's your age and she's going to be coming to New York soon" May said in an attempt to calm him down.

"Alright... what's she like?" Peter asked, his interest being gained.

"I don't know much about her but I hear she has a wonderful personality" May said in a happy tone. Peter knew what the term 'wonderful personality' meant. It was a term used for women, or girls, who had no good features in terms of facial looks or body shape, voice or eye colour and were pretty for their souls and aura. Peter shivered with a sickened groan before shaking his head.

"I think I'll pass, thanks anyway Aunt May" Peter said. He turned his head quickly as he heard his voice being called from across the street.

"Anyway Aunt May, I'll talk to you when I get home, love you, bye" Peter said, ending the call just as Cadance, who had strangely not seen before the party went to hell, rushed over to him and grabbed him by the shoulders.

"Where the fuck have you been!?" she demanded, looking enraged and anxious at the same time. Shining walked over and placed a hand on her shoulder, smiling gently at her.

"Now, now Cadance, the kid's probably had a stressful evening" Shining said quietly "Go easy on him" Cadance let go of Peter, ran a hand down her face while exhaling softly, looking at Peter with a calm expression. Peter smiled softly before Cadance snapped back to her aggressive mood and grabbed him by the collar, jutting her face inches in front of his.

"Where the fuck have you been!?" she bellowed into his face. At this point Shining had to drag his wife off the terrified looking child before Celestia and Luna hurried over to them, Celestia having a small cut on the left side of her head stitched up with a bandage poking out from under her right sleeve with Luna looking relatively untouched.

"Are you alright Princess?" Peter asked Celestia, walking closer to her with an examining eye "I got worried after I pushed you back-" If this was any other kind of sudden movement Peter's Spider-Sense would've warned him. But there were two instances of external stimuli that made him lower his guard; the first being Celestia's outstretched arms that wrapped around him and pulled him close to her, the second being face-to-chest contact. Peter's face was nearly completely covered by Celestia's large bust as the much taller woman hugged him tightly.

"Holy fuck" Peter's mind seemed to repeat endlessly, Celestia's perfume and bodily contact turned his mind to much whilst giving him no inclination of what to do with his suddenly numb hands.

"Thank you" she whispered to him "I don't think I would've made it through that alive if it wasn't for you noticing those bombs"

"No problem" Peter's muffled voice said. Celestia stepped back from him, her eyes back to their usual glowing shade but now a deeper shade of purple for some strange reason, and a wide smile on her face.

"What happened to you Peter?" Shining asked "Celestia told us that you heard the beeping of the breaching charges and climbed up to the roof and threw her inside before they exploded, what went down after that?" Peter took a brief second to formulate as water-tight of a lie as he could before answering.

"Well... the bomb went off and I got blasted off the roof by the shock wave but before I hit the floor that guy in the spider outfit caught me and put me down outside the building, told me to get as clear as I could before climbing back up the the party and doing whatever the hell he did... what did he do exactly?" Cadance looked at the others for a brief second and, upon nobody else speaking, began to explain.

"He came in through the window and started beating up everyone in the room" Cadance began.

"How?" Peter asked "Didn't they have guns and stuff?"

"Yeah, but this guy wasn't exactly normal, he had super powers that allowed him to shoot webs and stick to walls... and I think he could read people's minds, he could knew when and where those guys were going to hit him before they even moved" she continued.

"Super powered?" Peter asked "He's not a member of the Avengers is he?"

"If he is-" Celestia jumped in "I don't recognize him, he's either a new addition to the team or he doesn't work with them"

"We'll have to ask Director Fury about him when-" Luna began before Celestia shot her a look, causing her to nod and fall silent. Peter opened his mouth to question them before deciding he wouldn't get any answers out of them and allowing the subject to drop.

"Well... if we're done for tonight and all the crazy shit is over, I think I'm gonna head home" Peter shrugged, a wave of exhaustion suddenly washing over him. The others all said goodbye and Peter once again turned down the offer for a ride home, before embarking on his own walk home. As he rounded the corner onto the next block he checked all around him before ducking into an alley. He was preparing to leap up to the walls and begin swinging home before an alarm bell sounded from the next block over.

"What?" he asked in dismay "No, I wanna go home!" With an agitated sigh he changed back into his costume, webbing his party suit up against the wall of the alley, before leaping into action. He landed on the rooftop just in time to see a figure dressed in all black sprinting down the street.

"Hey!" he yelled "Stop right... why the fuck am I expecting that to work?" He threw himself forward and ran down the street only to have the robber leap nearly thirty feet into the air and onto a nearby rooftop.

"OK... this should be interesting" he said in an impressed tone "Here we go!" With another quick jump and a roll he was onto the same roof and closing in on the robber. The closer he got the more he could see the robber, being an extremely skinny male with a black, metallic helmet over their face in the shape of a lion.

"Hey Mufasa!" he yelled out to them "Your own personal wildebeest stampede's on it's way!" The robber ignored him, instead whirling around and launching a volley of silver coloured metal darts towards him. He skidded down onto his knees, bending over backwards to dodge them before quickly getting to his feet and picking up the pace. As the number of rooftops crossed increased the distance between the two of them decreased.

"As long as this lanky bastard doesn't jump to the next block or gain the ability to fly he'll be an easy target" Spider-Man chuckled. As if the hand of God extended down from heavens and flipped him the Holy Bird the robber threw himself out into the open air and extended their wrist, firing a thin, white cable from a gauntlet that latched onto a building, allowing them to swing down the street at a much faster pace.

"Well that's fucking brilliant" Spider-Man sighed, taking the pursuit to the air in a hurry, not wanting the robber to escape. As the city streets whizzed past underneath them, Spider-Man began to get angry, his tired and cranky attitude getting the better of him.

"Will you slow the fuck down, I promise I'll only hit you once if you do!" he called out. They didn't stop, instead rounding a corner and going to touch down on another roof. Spider-Man used the elasticity of the web-line to propel himself higher than the robber with a tug on the line and a shift of his weight, before aiming his web-shooter at the right ankle of the robber. Just a second before he touched down onto the rooftop Spider-Man activated the web-shooter and a short strand of web fired forward, sticking the man's foot to the rooftop.

"And it's good!" Spider-Man yelled, quickly web-zipping down to the rooftop and dusting off his hands, watching arrogantly as the man tried to pull his foot away. It occurred to him now that as well as being skinny the robber was extremely effeminate. He also noticed that the robber's suit incorporated a lot of white fur, on the wrists and around the neck of the mask. And the final thing he noticed was something he couldn't make out before from the distance he was at; breasts. Very large ones that were tucked away in an extremely tight, shapely leather cat-suit.

"Uh... who are you exactly?" Spider-Man asked, walking over to the man and pulling off the metal lion mask, allowing thick, luscious locks of white hair to fall down around her shoulders, revealing a beautiful women with sharp cheeks, a cute nose and emerald green eyes. She wore a thing eye mask with long, sharp points running down her cheeks and had a small smirk on her face.

"Whoa!" Spider-Man exclaimed, jumping back in shock, allowing the woman to use some kind of hidden claws in her gloves to cut through the webbing "Who the hell are you?!" She looked at him with a quizzical gaze, biting a rogue lip with a playful smirk on it. She used one arm to cup and slightly raise her breasts whilst scratching her cheek with the other.

"I could ask you the same thing" she said in a saucy, seductive purr. She walked towards him, her heels clicking as her hips swayed in time to an inaudible musical track with Spider-Man laying stunned on the ground, unable to move.

"So tell me, who's this dashing rogue I see before me?" she asked, raising an eyebrow quizzically. Spider-Man couldn't bring himself to speak, feeling nothing more than heat in every part of his body and praying to God that the ski suit was thick enough to hide an attentive soldier.

"What's the matter?" she asked with a wink "Cat got your tongue?"

"I... I'm going to have to ask you to hand the stuff you stole over... the nice people at that jewellery store worked very hard to get that in their stock and I'm sure they're not happy that America's next top model just made off with her diamond necklace before the final runway walk" She chuckled quietly, beginning to play around with the small metal zip at the top of her jumpsuit before dragging a gloved hand over her forehead.

"Is it just me-" she began, hooking a nail into the ring of the zipper and sliding it down, revealing her crevasse-like cleavage "Or is it really hot tonight?" Spider-Man mentally slapped himself before kicking back to his feet and clearing his throat.

"Now I don't want any trouble, just give me the stuff back and you can be on your way-" he began, holding his hand out for the jewellery back. The woman hung her head and sighed, holding her hands out to the sides for a brief second.

"Alright, fine, I'll come quietly" she nodded, scratching her head and revealing a pair of faux cat ears on her head "Just don't hurt me and I'll give the stuff back to-" Ending her sentence quickly and lashing out with a spinning kick in an attempt to catch her opponent off-guard may have worked with anyone else but his Spider-Sense warned him about the attack, allowing him to dodge it by bending over backwards to a ninety degree angle before hand-springing backwards several yards.

"Hey, I thought you said-" Spider-Man began before she cut him off.

"I lied sweetie, I really thought you'd get that" she chuckled, rolling her neck with a loud crack and settling into a fighting stance "Now come on, make me work for my treats"

"I already said I don't want trouble..." Spider-Man said slowly, holding his hands up in a passive manner.

"Don't you know?" she asked with another wink "Black Cats are always trouble" Spider-Man sighed, cracking his knuckles and lowering himself into a fighting stance of his own.

"And you should know that a spider only becomes aggressive when backed into a corner" he said.

"Honey... that was awful" she giggled.

"Cut me some slack will you?" he asked bitterly "I've only just started doing this"

"Sorry honey but I don't do slack... I like to keep it nice and firm" she retorted. Spider-Man remained silent for a long second before sighing.

"I don't... I don't know how to respond to that" he mumbled.

"How about agh?" she suggested.

"Why would I-" he began before she launched forward, faster than most humans and than he expected her to "Agh!" She swung with her right hand, having the attack dodged, and following it up with a vicious knee to the sternum. Spider-Man barely managed to cross his arms over his chest in time to block the attack. He expected her to jump back and then lunge at him again but instead what she did was throw her leg backwards, using inhuman flexibility to rotate on her joint and turn the low kick into an overhead high kick. Being unable to respond, due to shock and having put himself in an awkward stance, having his arms underneath his chest and being hunched over, the kick slammed into the back of his head and knocked him straight to the floor.

"How the hell did you do that?" Spider-Man asked, pushing off on his hands and rolling forward into a forward dive.

"Great training and a lot of lonely nights in my college dorm room getting freaky" she giggled, dropping down onto her shins and lying her back flat on the ground as Spider-Man lunged over her.

"Ewww" Spider-Man cringed, rolling back to his feet and shaking his head.

"Oh don't lie, you love the idea of seeing me do that" she smirked, getting back to her feet and pivoting on her heel to face him, extending her claws from her gloves again.

"I need an adult" he whimpered.

"I am an adult" she said, blowing a kiss at him before lashing her hand out and firing her cable at him. Instead of dodging the attack he caught the cable and yanked it towards him, pulling the taller woman over to him. To his surprise, instead of trying to leap over him or move around him she wrapped herself around him and placed her face close to his.

"Hey there cutie" she winked, pecking him on the cheek. She then tried to use her greater body weight to throw him to the floor but using his adhesive abilities he stood strong.

"Oh..." she said, blinking twice "I didn't expect that"

"Indeed" Spider-Man said, cocking back his head and slamming it into the bridge of her nose. The attack dazed her and Spider-Man then threw her off him. She landed hard on the ground and got to her knees, clutching her nose and weeping loudly. Guilt welled up in Spider-Man's chest, causing him to rush over to her.

"I'm sorry... are you alright?" he asked her, reaching out with a hand to check her. She stopped sobbing and lashed out with her own hand, grabbing hold of his wrist and twisting at a sharp angle, his Spider-Sense warning him but the woman moving too quick for him to do anything about it. The attack caused him to open his defence and she lashed out with her palm, striking him just below his ribs and winding him. He doubled over and she stepped forward, kneeing him in the nose and knocking him onto his back.

"Wow, how did you fall for that?" she asked with a loud laugh "I never actually expected that to work but, I gotta say, you surprised me... and they say that chivalry is dead"

"I don't like hitting on women" Spider-Man muttered weakly, attempting to kick back up only to have the woman fire two cables from her wrists, forcing his hands to the ground and fastening them there.

"Funny, like that's gonna hold me" Spider-Man laughed, throwing his hands forward only to have them not be able to pull the cables loose "Hey... what the hell are these made of?"

"Custom material, too expensive to even mention, provided by my oh-so-lovely employer, the Big Man" she said, rubbing her nails with her thumb before looking down at him "You can't break them, they were designed by Stark to be strong enough to contain the Hulk" Spider-Man sighed loudly, resting his head on the rooftop.

"Fuck" he grunted.

"What's wrong honey?" she asked in a condescending tone.

"I lost" he answered.

"Yeah, most people usually do when they go up against me" she nodded.

"How the fuck did I lose?" he growled, clenching his fists in anger.

"Because I'm better than you, that's how" she responded "Don't feel bad, I'm just the best at this kind of thing" Spider-Man swore loudly under his breath, his petulant, childish desire to be the best bolstering his strength greatly.

"Hey now, I already said the cables can't be broken" she said.

"The cables might not-" he said, a loud cracking noise sounding "But the roof will!" He tore a large chunk away from the roof and attempted to kick back up to his feet for a second time only to have the woman swing a leg over him and pin him to the ground with her greater body weight. The anger in Spider-Man's blood dissipated immediately as she felt her curvy body press against his.

"Now, now" she said slowly, sitting back on his groin and placing her hands flat on his abdomen, playing with the muscle under the suit "There's no need to get angry... wow, you're quite hunky for being such a little guy" The used another set of cables on her wrist to grab the jewellery bag and, upon Spider-Man attempting to make a move, she used another cable to bind his neck to the rooftop.

"As I said, you lost" she mocked "Better luck next time honey" At this point a bright light shone down on them as a police chopper flew up above the roof, a loudspeaker issuing orders to them.

"Both of you get on the ground and place your hands behind your heads, you're under arrest!" they yelled.

"Both of us!?" Spider-Man yelled "She's the thief not me!" The woman looked up at the chopper before seeing a group of police officers run onto the rooftop. She looked down at Spider-Man before speaking.

"Come on Deary, don't say that, now, you take care of these nice gentlemen and I'll have our dinners ready back at our house" she said, leaning down and kissing him on the cheek "Tootles!" With that she threw herself off the roof and disappeared into the night, causing the police officers to draw their weapons and aim them at Spider-Man.

"You heard her!" one of them yelled "They're working together!"

"If we get him, he'll tell us where his wife is!" another nodded.

"She's not my wife!" Spider-Man said, wrenching the cable from the rooftop, breaking the structure further, and rolling onto his back "I'm not a criminal, I'm one of thoe good guys!"

"Freeze pal!" a third officer yelled, aiming his gun at Spider-Man's head "One more step and I'll open fire!"

"Just listen to me, I'm with-" Spider-Man tried to say, taking a step forward. The officer began to pull the trigger repeatedly, bullets firing at Spider-Man. He rushed forward and slammed an elbow into the officer's face on instinct alone before realizing that was not a smart move.

"He attacked, shoot the fucker!" a fourth screamed.The officers turned and opened fire on Spider-Man, forcing him to dodge to the edge of the rooftop.

"Wait!" he yelled.

"Fire!" a police officer responded.

"Fuck!" Spider-Man barked, throwing himself off the roof just as another hail of bullets flew over his head. He began to rapidly swing away from the building, easily outrunning the chopper by going lower to the streets and taking short cuts through alleys and tight gaps in between buildings. After losing his pursuers he landed on top of an empty building and dropped onto his rear, placing an arm on his knee and panting heavily. He pulled his mask off and ran a hand through his hair, now flattened from the amount of time he'd had the mask on.

"I try to help them and I get shot at?" he asked himself angrily "And who the hell was that chick anyway? What was her deal?" Peter rubbed his stinging eyes, only now realizing how much energy he'd spent on the fight and the escape. Standing up and pulling the mask back on he decided to go home and get some sleep. Before setting out on his journey he reloaded his web-shooters and prepared to swing back in the direction of Queens before realizing that he had to go back and get his party suit.

"Oh fuck me!" he hissed, tensing his muscles before turning around and heading back to the alley he'd left the suit in.


Peter closed the door as quietly as he could, walking into the kitchen just in time to see his Aunt May slide a stack of papers behind a clay urn in a display cupboard. Curiosity gripped Peter as he wanted to find out what they were but he could tell from the way his Aunt was hiding them she didn't want him to see what they were.

"Hey Aunt May" he said loudly, grabbing a glass from the washboard and filling it up with water. The old woman gasped loudly, whirling around and scowling at her nephew irritably.

"Don't scare me like that Peter, you'll give me a heart attack one of these days you know" she scolded.

"No I won't, you're a tough old girl" Peter chuckled, gulping down the water before refilling it immediately afterwards "Wow, I'm thirsty"

"They didn't serve refreshments at the party?" May asked.

"They did, but it was mostly alcohol with a few drinks of Schweppes lemonade" Peter answered.

"That's still alcoholic thought" May commented.

"I know" Peter nodded, gulping down the cold water and getting a third glass "I didn't drink much while I was there as you can guess"

"Indeed... so, did you give any more thought about dating Mrs Watson's niece?" May asked with a hopeful look in her eyes.

"No, not really" Peter said "I'm kinda tired right now from all of my hours of doing the Twist tonight Aunt May so I think I'm gonna head to bed" May nodded, turning towards the door to the hallway where the staircase was.

"Me too... I'll see you tomorrow Peter" she said, sounding heavy hearted.

"Everything alright Aunt May?" he asked, knowing full well something was wrong.

"Everything's fine Peter, don't you worry" May answered with a soft smile.

"I always do, especially when it comes to family" Peter smirked with a nod "You go and get some sleep gorgeous, we don't want you getting crows feet before your fifty fifth birthday do we?"

"I should be so lucky" May chuckled, yawning before heading up the stairs "Goodnight Peter, I love you"

"Love you too Aunt May, see you tomorrow" Peter nodded. He waited until he heard May's door close and her click off her bedroom light before going over to the urn she had put something behind. He slid it away as quietly as possible before removing a stack of letters and notices. He read through all of them and saw nothing more than mounting bills that even he knew his Aunt couldn't pay on her own.

"Oh fuck" Peter sighed, placing a hand on his head and sighing, looking at the huge electricity bill they'd, or he'd, racked up through use of all of his electronic items "We can't pay these... I'm gonna have to start selling shit... or..." Peter said, thinking back to his encounter with the woman in black.

"She probably made a killing off that jewellery heist, and if she does that often enough she's probably a millionaire" he hummed, thinking over the possibility of turning to crime "No, I couldn't... with great power comes great responsibility, and I can't get myself arrested and leave Aunt May here on her own, she'd go mad" He drummed his hand on the table anxiously, chewing his lip as he tried to think of a way to help pay for the bills without stealing things. He put the bills back into place and slid the urn back over them before going up to bed, his body tired and sore with his mind still buzzing with stress and anxiety. The Parker family was flat-out broke.

And it was up to him to solve that problem.

Outranked and Overpowered

Peter's eyes cracked open as he heard a loud knocking at the front door, followed by the doorbell and then the sound of the letterbox rattling.

"Huwhat..." Peter mumbled, groggily clambering out of bed, pulling a pair of boxers on over his bare crotch and grabbing a discarded white shirt from the floor and pulling it on "Aunt May?" Peter waited several seconds before remembering that his Aunt would be at work, on shift at the hospital and would be for the rest of the day, meaning he would have to get the mail. He plodded heavily down the stairs before walking over to the door, seeing a copy of the Daily Bugle, jutting out of the letterbox.

"Awesome" he grumbled "Let's see if I made the news from yesterday" Peter checked the front page of the newspaper and was disgusted to see the headline.

One time Vigilante Spider-Man robs jewellery store, attacks police and escapes with accomplice

"What!?" he exclaimed, checking the page number before flipping to it "Masked menace Spider-Man gets on the law's good-side by pretending to save the princesses before surprising the public by robbing a high-class, family owned jewellery store with his partner in crime, the mysterious Black Cat... that is fucking ridiculous, I didn't steal anything!" Peter prepared to scrunch up the paper and throw it aside before he noticed a small advertisement at the bottom of the page.

Wanted: Photographer to take pictures of Spider-Man

"Hang on..." Peter hummed, thinking through the process of taking pictures of himself as Spider-Man and then selling them to the Bugle before nodding his head "Yeah, that's a great idea" He placed the newspaper down on the table next to the front door before walking into the living room and sitting down on the couch. The second he found the TV remote and got into a comfortable position the doorbell rang again.

"Fuck me..." Peter growled, getting up and storming over to the door. He unlocked it quickly and swung it open to see Twilight standing outside wearing a dark purple beanie, a black leather jacket and a chequered purple skirt with knee high black boots on.

"Oh... hey Twilight" he said slowly "Shouldn't you be at school?" Twilight looked at his attire before raising an eyebrow.

"Did you just wake up?" she asked, dodging the question completely.

"Yes, but why aren't you at school?" Peter repeated in a sterner tone.

"Can I come in?" she asked, kneading the porch with her boot.

"Twilight-" Peter began before she simply walked inside and forced him to close the door.

"Thanks Peter" she nodded, walking briskly into the living room.

"Twilight!" Peter snapped, grabbing hold of her arm and pulling her back "Why aren't you at school?" Twilight looked at Peter in the eyes before dropping her gaze with a sigh.

"I'm... I'm sorry" she muttered under her breath.

"Pardon?" Peter asked.

"I'm sorry" she repeated in a louder voice.

"For what?" Peter asked in confusion.

"For what happened at the suit store... when I kissed you..." Twilight sighed "I didn't mean anything by it and I really wish I could take it back" Peter nodded slowly, scratching his shoulder briefly before shrugging.

"If you want to forget about it, then it's no big deal... well..." Peter muttered, rubbing the back of his neck.

"What d'you mean... did it mean something to you?" Twilight asked, looking at Peter with her face turned away slightly.

"Not on an emotional scale, but, it was kind of a landmark for me" Peter added, feeling too embarrassed to admit the real reason it mattered to him. But Twilight being the smart girl she was, managed to piece together his sheepishness and come up with an answer.

"Oh my God, that was your first kiss, wasn't it?" Twilight asked in horror.

"Maybe" Peter chuckled "I think it's great to know that it meant nothing to you" Twilight's gaze dropped even further from Peter's eyes, the young man quickly feeling a pang of guilt in his chest.

"Sorry Twilight, that was dickish, I didn't mean it" he said in an apologetic tone. Twilight nodded but didn't answer him, looking at the clock before sighing loudly.

"I should get going" she said, quickly turning towards the door and without saying goodbye, simply turned and left. The seconds after she left Peter didn't know how to react but when they passed he felt a burst of anger well up inside him. He whirled around and grasped the underside of the table, forcing himself at the last second to not throw it across the room.

"You selfish little cunt!" Peter hissed, slamming his hand to his forehead "She comes here to clear this up, to say she's sorry and you just had to turn into a petulant little cunt didn't you Parker!?" He let go of the table and clenched his fists down by his sides, screwing his eyes shut and taking a deep breath.

"Alright Parker, you're nearly a grown man, except not at all, so you can man up and apologise to her before she gets too far away" Peter decided, turning around and opening the door only to see a black car drive quickly down the street with Twilight rolling up the tinted window "Well... fuck" He slammed the door and stormed back upstairs and upon deciding he needed some air changed into his Spider-Suit and climbed out his bedroom window and into the back yard, trying his best to avoid being spotted leaving the house in his suit.


After a quick swing around Midtown he had already stopped three robberies and, much to his discomfort, prevented, or nterrupted a woman's rape.

"T-Thank you" she muttered, trying her best to cover herself up and hide her injuries. Spider-Man's insides boiled with rage, having half the mind to snap the man's neck for what he'd tried to do to this woman. But on the other hand, he was grateful to know that this man existed, that his kind existed. It made it clear to him that the villains he fought wouldn't be super villains, just the regular scum of the earth criminals that existed on the list with paedophiles, child murderers and rapists. Swallowing down a sick feeling in his stomach he used his webbing to path together the woman's clothing as best as he could before offering to give her a lift back home.

"I'll... I'll be fine" she muttered, taking her purse from the ground and faking a smile.

"Are you sure?" Spider-Man asked, hiding his anger and disgust from the young woman, looking at the unconscious and webbed-up criminal "You don't know him, do you?"

"Y-Yeah" she nodded solemnly "He's my ex-boyfriend, we broke up a few months back and he'd threatened to do this... but I never thought he actually would"

"Right... I'm sorry this had to happen ma'am" Spider-Man said, reaching into his backpack and pulling out a small notepad and pen, scribbling a message down onto the paper before sticking it onto the webbing he'd already used to bind the man down.

"Alright, you look after yourself now" Spider-Man said, nodding at her as he leapt into the air and began to swing away.

"I will" she muttered under her breath, a small tear running down her face.

"This place is fucked up... I didn't expect it to be this bad, I never heard about this kind of shit in the Batman comics, he and Robin never solved the case of the Dastardly, Devious Dicker did they?" he thought to himself before growling angrily "Don't even joke about that kind of shit man, this was the opposite of funny in every way" The wind rushed by him, sounds muffled and buildings blurred by the speed he swung at. Even at the speed he swung he managed to catch a glimpse of red and black keeping up with him. He was prepared to stop and get a better looked before his Spider-Sense alerted him to non-direct danger. Confused at the feeling he got his attempts to move were thwarted by a metallic ringing sound followed by a red and blue object slicing through his web.

"Fuck!" he yelled, dropping down several feet before recovering by firing another web. His Spider-Sense should have been giving him the warnings he needed to dodge these attacks but the sense was warning him of a constant threat in three precise directions while half-urging him to move in every other direction, utterly confusing him on what to do and where to go. His web was cut once more by an expertly aimed bullet before a powerful figure leapt up behind him, ploughing his shoulder into his back and driving him down onto a nearby rooftop. Spider-Man rolled, recovering from the painful impact as best he could, before getting up to his feet and standing up straight. There was another metallic flying noise before the figure landed, grabbing hold of the red and blue weapon and fastening it onto his arm.

"No... way" Spider-Man gasped, looking at the red, white and blue clad superhero "C-Captain America?" The taller man looked down at Spider-Man from underneath his blue helmet with cold eyes, eyeing and sizing up his opponent before whistling loudly, another figure suddenly appearing from behind Spider-Man with a small handgun aimed at him. Spider-Man turned to look at this new challenger before recognizing her signature body-tight black combat suit and blood red hair.

"Black Widow?" he asked in confusion "W-What are you guys doing here?"

"Isn't it obvious?" Black Widow asked, walking around to his front while twizzling a pair of handcuffs around her skinny index finger "Arresting you" Spider-Man stepped back in shock, looking between the two heroes quickly.

"Why?" he demanded "What the fuck did I do?!" The older two heroes engaged in a scissor movement, trying to cut him off while staying in front of him at all times.

"You exist, you're an unregistered mutant who decided to take the law into his own hands" Captain America growled "We're bringing you in for ID and registering into the S.H.I.E.L.D database"

"Ho, ho, hold the fuck up" Spider-Man snarled "I don't think so, you think I wear this mask just cause it completes my outfit?"

"Mask or not, secret identity or not, you're a liability" Black Widow hissed, gripping the gun with her second hand "Now are you gonna come quietly?" Spider-Man sighed, lolling his head downwards briefly, holding his hands above his head. Black Widow nodded contemptibly before lowering her weapon and putting it back into her holster. In a brief movement Spider-Man aimed a web-shooter at her hand, trapping her hand and gun into the holster before leaping forwards in an attempt to attack Captain America. The much more experienced superhero slapped aside the attack and quickly, much faster than humanly possible, he launched his fist forward and punched Spider-Man square in the nose. His momentum caused his legs to fly out in front of him while the force of the punch sent his top half straight down to the rooftop. He placed his hands beneath him, attempting to round off from the impact and get back to his feet only to have Black Widow flip herself over and slam the heel of her stilettos into his stomach, drinving his back down to the ground with a pained hiss. She quickly drew another gun from behind her and jammed it against his skull, growling angrily at him.

"As we said, you're a liability" she snarled "And we're bringing you in, now" Spider-Man dropped his head onto the ground, sighing in defeat and anger.


Spider-Man was shoved, disarmed and stripped of most of his equipment, through a set of open doors into a large command room. His hands were bound behind his back with some kind of futuristic and damn-near unbreakable technology with a shock collar having been tied around his neck in case he attempted another daring escape. He was forced down into a chair at the far end of a table while another, much larger chair remained turned away from him.

"So... you're this Spider-Man we've heard so much about?" a male voice asked, the chair turning around to reveal a dark skinned man with a shaved head and an eye-patch over his left eye. Spider-Man looked at him, an air of disgust hidden underneath his mask, which was quick to be revealed. The man with the eye-patch twirled his finger around in a circle and Captain America grabbed hold of Spider-Man's shoulder before reaching over and pulling his mask off, much to the dismay of the costumed superhero.

"Hey!" Spider-Man barked, trying desperately to stop his identity from being revealed. The Captain threw the mask over to the man at the end of the table who looked at it with distaste.

"Well I'll be damned... I've seen some shoddily made costumes but this, this just takes the cake" he chuckled, placing a hand inside of it and moving it around "This thing has to chafe a little right?" Peter didn't answer, instead he stared at the table with his jaw clenched.

"Hold on a second!" the voice of Black Widow called, leaping down from a higher railing and storming over to Peter, grabbing him roughly by the jaw and forcing him to look at her "How old are you? Twelve!?"

"I'm fifteen" he snapped, as if it made a difference. Black Widow turned to face the man at the end of the table with a furious glint in her eye.

"Director Fury!" she snapped "I refuse to serve alongside some little brat who isn't even old enough to grow facial hair!"

"Natasha, calm down" Fury said with a wave of his hand "He's not going to work with you, not yet at least"

"What do you mean not yet?" Peter demanded "I'm not doing anything for you people, I don't even know who you are!"

"Then let's get a few introductions out of the way, this is Natasha Romanov, also known as the Black Widow" Fury said, pointing at the ice-cold woman who turned away from Peter with a flick of her gorgeous red hair "And the man next to you is someone you'll recognize; Steve Rogers A.K.A Captain America" Steve took off his helmet, revealing his chiselled features and flattened blond hair, holding out a hand with a friendly smile.

"The pleasure's mine... and, uh, sorry about the rough treatment earlier kid" Steve said. Peter looked at him for a long second before nodding, holding out his right hand as best as he could, it being cuffed, and shook the taller man's hand.

"It's alright, I'm used to getting slapped around at school anyway" Peter said with his own smile "It's an honour to meet you sir, I've heard so much about you"

"Thank you kid, I wish I could say the same about you but it seems you're relatively new on the scene" Steve smirked, pulling out a chair from under the table and sitting down next to Peter, linking his fingers on the desk. Peter felt comfortable around Captain America, he gave off a powerful yet kind vibe as if he were someone to not cross but also someone who could be extremely friendly to those he was on good terms with.

"So, are you going to introduce yourself or do we have to drag you door to door in New York until someone claims ownership?" Fur asked, clapping his hands together loudly.

"Do I have to?" Peter sighed, lowering his eyes again.

"It would be helpful to us, speed the process along and save the government a few hundred thousand dollars in tax payers money" Steve said.

"Wow" Peter blinked "I never thought I'd feel so bad about being worth that much money"

"So?" Fury repeated.

"Alright... my name is Peter Parker, I'm fifteen years old and I live in Queens with my Aunt May-" Peter began before being interrupted.

"I've heard enough of this" Black Widow snapped, storming away from the table and exiting the command room, her tightly-clad backside's movement catching Peter's eyes as she left. His eyes caught with Steve's who merely smirked at him in a proud manner before looking back at Fury in a serious one.

"Continue" Fury nodded with a wave of his hand, leaning back in his chair.

"Anyway, I live in Queens with my Aunt May and go to Midtown High in New York, I'm currently unemployed and in need of serious cash to help pay for bills" Peter explained.

"And you're not going to turn to crime for that money I trust?" Fury asked quickly, pointing at him softly.

"Right now, no I'm not" Peter said with a shake of his head.

"Right now isn't good enough kid, I need your word on that so I can begin to trust you, or set up surveillance actually, or ,failing to provide your word, save millions of dollars later down the line by terminating you right here and now" Fury answered.

"I swear on my Uncle Ben I won't turn to crime" Peter nodded.

"I'll read up on your file to see if that's enough of a guarantee" Fury said, scratching his chin in thought.

"Wait, what?" Peter said, sitting up straighter "You have a file on me?" Fury's attention was drawn by a light on the desk next to him beginning to blink.

"We do now" he said, pressing the button next to the light and having a hologram appear in front of him. The information on it was backwards but Peter was able to make out his, terrible he might add, mugshot from a school photo, coupled with his date of birth and full name.

"Steve, let him go" Fury said as he pointed at Captain America.

"You sure?" Steve asked.

"Positive, give him a tour of the Triskellion while I read this, just make sure he doesn't try to escape" Fury answered. Steve nodded and slipped his glove off, pressing a finger onto a scanner built into the handcuffs and, upon a blue light shining, he slid his finger down off the scanner and the handcuffs dropped off Peter's wrists.

"Thanks man" Peter nodded.

"No problem kid" Steve said, standing up straight and dusting his hands together "You ready for a walk around?"

"Can I have my mask back?" Peter asked "And my web-shooters"

"Web-shooters yes, mask no" Fury answered, stuffing the less-than-stellar-quality mask into his jacket pocket.

"Why not?" Peter demanded.

"Insurance, to make sure you don't go running off in secret" Fury chuckled "You're not going anywhere without your mask are you, don't wanna risk revealing your secret identity do we?" Peter nodded with a sigh before Steve patted him on the back with a sympathetic smile.

"Can you at least take the collar off?" Peter requested.

"No" was all Fury responded with.

"Fantastic" peter glowered, hanging his head in defeat.

Electric Personality

Twilight watched as the woman was guided out of the police station, seeing her wave at Shining with a sad smile before disappearing from sight. Shining put a hand to his forehead and sighed, a glimmer of exhaustion in his eyes before he regained his composure. He walked back over to Twilight whilst flicking a piece of paper between his fingers.

"What's the schtick?" Twilight asked calmly.

"Rescued rape victim" Shining answered.

"Wow, who stopped it?" Twilight asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Take a guess" Shining said, placing the piece of paper down on the table in front of his sister. She cast her eyes down to the paper, noticing the new, yet familiar somehow, note. She picked it up and stared at the hand-writing, squinting as she racked her brains to try and figure out why it sounded in her memory.

"Huh" she said, feigning a satisfied look before handing the card back to her brother "Guy's working, that's for sure... say, what's your take on his jewellery store robbery?"

"In my honest opinion, I don't think he was robbing the place, from what we say of him that night if he was trying to rob the place he would've gotten away with it without a hitch" Shining shrugged. Shining fell silent for a long moment, taking his phone out of his pocket as he dropped the note back onto the table.

"Hello?" Shining asked as he answered the call Twilight only just realized he was getting. Shining was silent for a moment before his eyes widened in shock, his fist curling down at his side.

"What?!" he exclaimed "Where is she? Is she OK?!" Shining rushed around the side of the desk, opening the drawer and pulling out a handgun.

"Whoa, what the hell's going on?" Twilight asked in a surprised tone.

"Cadence is in danger again, some freak with electric powers just came sprinting out of the Oscorp building and straight into the car Cadence was in" Shining said, belting on his gun and hanging up his phone.

"Why was she at Oscorp?" Twilight asked.

"I'll find that out later, you stay here and don't follow me!" Shining ordered. Twilight blinked blankly as her enraged brother sprinted out of the room. She linked her fingers together and pursed her lips before slyly sliding a hand over to the card left by Spider-Man and slipping it into her pocket.

"Yoink" she whispered before exiting the room, determined to find out where she recognized the hand writing from.


Peter found himself being dragged back into the briefing room where he had been earlier to see several people gathered around a screen.

"Wassup?" Peter asked, trying to get a look at the screen.

"That's none of your concern-" Black Widow began to snap before being cut off by Fury.

"We intercepted a radio call out from the NYPD in regards to some freak shooting lightning around the city" Fury answered. Widow shot him a furious glare before Banner spoke up.

"Not to sound like an asshole or anything, but that's not really our problem is it?" he asked.

"It wouldn't be if not for this" Fury said, hitting a button to make a hologram project in the middle of the table. The image displayed security camera footage of an expensive looking limo having been flipped on its side with a familiar face cowering behind it.

"Great, Cadance has gotten herself into trouble" Black Widow sighed "And in New York no less... at times I wish that Daredevil never retired"

"As you can see, now that we've got one of our VIPs in danger we have to help out" Fury continued "Suit up" The Avengers nodded and moved away, each going to an assigned locker against the wall to gear up. Peter folded his arms and shifted his weight back and forth between his legs. Fury looked at him for a long second before cocking an eyebrow.

"And you're still standing there because...?" Fury asked.

"What d'you mean?" Peter asked in confusion.

"I said suit up, that means you're on duty" Fury answered, throwing Peter's mask back over to him "Get your web propulsion attachments from Dr Banner's lab and meet us back here in five minutes"

"Thanks... oh, and they're called web-shooters" Peter corrected. Fury obviously had distaste for the name but decided to keep it to himself but before he could turn to address the other Avengers Black Widow slammed her hand on the desk and glared at Fury.

"Director Fury I implore you to reconsider bringing him with us, he's an untrained rookie and we don't know what side he's on, he could compromise the entire operation and get the Princess killed!" Widow hissed. Fury looked at her for a second before standing up straight and looking down at her.

"Untrained he is, this outing is our best chance to get a first hand look at what he's capable of, a rookie he is too, but so were you at one point and if I remember correctly it's impossible to not be a rookie before you're sent on your first mission, not knowing his moral standing, we do indeed as he was the one that saved nearly the entire royal family a few days ago, and the chances of him compromising the mission are extremely small seeing as how you're all highly trained operatives and know how to control a child... any other problems?"

"Yes, he's too young" Widow nodded, not stepping back from her boss.

"Wrong, he's the right age to start, old enough to have a basic understanding of how this kind of thing works but still young enough to not have his own style and operations manual" Fury corrected before looking at Peter "Now get going, you've got four minutes now"

"Right" Peter nodded, rushing back through the Triskellion to get his web-shooters.


The strange electric man seemed to be crying angrily as he attempted to control himself. His upper right body was a deep yellow colour with three of the fingers on his right hand burned off, his hair fried and falling out with his teeth blackened and his left eye burned shut.

"Somebody make it stop!" he screamed, slamming a burned fist into the ground and sending out an electric shockwave "It hurts!"

"Take him down!" one of the surrounding police officers yelled, aiming his weapon at the screaming man, bullets whizzing forwards and embedding themselves into the man's body. He screamed in agony and began to repeatedly stamp his foot onto the ground, spots of electricity glowing on his body before the bullets were repelled, embedding themselves into objects and several innocent bystanders. The dead and injured people dropped to the floor and the electrically charged bullets shocked them, loud screams coming from all over the crowd as they began to sprint away.

"Cease fire, hold your men back!" a loud voice yelled. The policeman looked to his side just in time to see Captain America leap over a car and into the circle created by the police cars parked around the man. Captain America stopped quickly and looked at the man who whirled around upon hearing him.

"Help me!" he yelled, almost begging.

"Just calm down... you don't need to hurt anyone else, we can talk about this" Captain America said, holding his hands up and slowly walking towards the sobbing man "What happened?" The man looked at the floor for a long second with his hands to his head.

"Oscorp... the lab accident, Osborn..." the man said, his voice becoming more and more slurred as he spoke. He suddenly narrowed his eyes and clenched his fists "Osborn!"

"What about him?" Captain America responded quickly, trying to keep the man's attention on him.

"He did this to me!" he roared "I'll kill him for this!"

"Hey, you're not gonna kill anyone else!" Captain America snapped. The man looked up at him, glaring furiously and barring his charred teeth.

"You're not gonna stop me!" he screamed suddenly, a bright current of electricity coursing over his body "I'll kill you too!" He flung his arms out and a bolt of electricity shot out, moving too fast for Captain America to dodge. The bolt hit him in the chest, shocking him and throwing him hard onto his back.

"Captain!" the Black Widow yelled, sprinting over to Steve and grabbing hold of his costume and pulling him away from the electric man "Avengers, on me!" Captain America blinked weakly, groaning as he sat up behind the car they were behind. Banner skidded over to them and nodded but there was no sign of Spider-Man anywhere.

"Where's the kid?" Dr Banner asked.

"I... I think the little shit's bailed on us" Widow snarled "I knew we shouldn't have trusted him!"

"Widow... he might just have..." Captain America tried to say before stopping to take a breath, unable to speak just yet.

"Just have what Captain?" she snapped "He's gone!"

"Hey Sparkles!?" came the voice that contradicted Widow's statement "I know everyone wants to be the light of someone's life but could you tone it down just a bit, you're kinda making me feel sick" Widow poked her head out from behind the car just in time to see Spider-Man sitting with a leg resting on his knee on top of one of the police cars.

"What the hell is he doing?" she hissed.

"Who are you?!" the man demanded.

"I'm Spider-Man" he said, hopping down off the car and beginning to walk towards the charged man "I'm gonna try and help you"

"No, I'm gonna kill Osborn and no one can stop me!" he yelled, shaking his head furiously.

"You know that's not going to help anyone pal, so just come over here and we can talk about this-" Spider-Man said, holding his hand out in front of him only to have the electric man attempts to blast him with electricity. Spider-Man threw himself onto his back, the bolt flying over him and hitting a car, shoving it back and charging it briefly. He rolled back up onto his feet and fired a web into the man's face. The web hit him but was fried instantly, dropping to the ground as a black, charred stick.

"Huh, I thought that was gonna work" he sighed, placing his hands on his hips.

"Fuck you!" the man screamed, beginning to fire more and more bolts at Spider-Man who was having to move faster than he had before.

"Wow, all this action is really fun, I feel absolutely ec-static!" he yelled jokingly.

"Shut up!" the ma yelled, holding his hand down by his side and charging the electricity for a second before throwing a much wider bolt.

"Whoa, I'm surging with excitement here!" Spider-Man mocked, side-flipping over the bolt and landing on top of a car before throwing himself forwards, slamming his foot into the face of the electric man. He was sent flying back into a car, the door crushing from the impact.

"To be honest, If I were you I think I'd just give up the fight and bolt" he chuckled, dusting his hands off. He looked at the man for a long second but he remained unmoving.

"And that's that, I guess" he said, turning around and walking over to the other Avengers. He attempted to speak only to have Widow stand up and yell at him.

"What the hell was that!?" she demanded "We were supposed to work together!"

"I know, but you're all just too slow" he shrugged "I just cleaned up easily there and you didn't even need to do anything, you should be thanking me"

"Don't get cocky kid, you got lucky!" Widow barked. She continued to yell at him but her voice became extremely quiet as his Spider-Sense began to flare up. He whirled around to see the electric man had pulled open a power box and had began tearing at the wires.

"Oh fuck" he whispered, sprinting towards the man in an attempt to stop him connecting himself to the city's power grid but he wasn't fast enough. The man jammed his fist into the exposed wires and began to absorb the electric energy.

"Yes!" the man yelled "Now no one can stop me!" As the few human parts of his body left became electrically charged he stamped his foot on the ground, sending a shockwave across the street once more, this time catching Spider-Man and throwing him back, a pained scream coming from him as the current surged through his body and caused his muscles to spasm. The man laughed loudly before his voice cracked suddenly, an alarmed look on his face.

"What... no... no!" he bellowed as his body began to spark wildly, his eyes and mouth glowing bright colours as his body swelled up before it exploded in a spectacular expression, the sirens of the police cars and the cameras of those taking pictures of the event shutting off due to the electro-magnetic pulse. The crowd was silent for a brief moment before they began to cheer loudly, applauding and whistling at the apparent victory over the super-powered man. The other Avengers rushed towards Spider-Man who lay on the floor with smoke rising off his charred costume.

"You alright kid?" Captain America asked, offering a hand to him.

"Yeah" he grunted, taking the hand and pulling himself up "Nothing seriously injured, just a shit load of pain"

"That's what you get if you go running in like a moron" Black Widow growled, shaking her head before storming off.

"Widow, wait!" Dr Banner called out to her.

"Let her go" Captain America sighed "She's angry, and you kid, didn't exactly play that the smartest way you could have"

"I did what I thought I was supposed to" Spider-Man growled, crossing his arms.

"I'll tell you now, what you thought you're supposed to do and what you were supposed to do were two completely different things" he responded.

"I don't have to do anything you tell me to do" Spider-Man countered.

"But you'd perform better if you did" Captain America shrugged, turning his back on Spider-Man and beginning to walk away.

"I've done fine so far" Spider-Man called out.

"You've only just started kid, you don't even know difficulty yet" Captain America scoffed.


Twilight set the card down on the table and began to rummage through her drawers, looking for the single item that could prove or deny her hunch. She closed her hand around a small stack of papers and pulled them out, setting them down on her desk next to the card. She took the first paper off the pile and opened it, it being one of Peter's letters to her before they'd met in person. She cross-referenced the the capitalized S and M that was on both the card and the letter and found that they were a match in style and general size. She then moved on to the lower case letters, finding that they too were also a match to the words written on the card. Twilight sat down in her desk and nodded slowly.

"So... we have a case, evidence and a suspect" she muttered to herself, stuffing both items into her school bag that was leaning against her desk "All we need now is the conviction"

Reluctant Business Partners

The sun had gone down since Spider-Man had left the Avengers, having gotten over his surprise that they'd simply let him go when he realized that they had his identity and home address, if they wanted to find him then he knew they would.

"So..." he said to himself, swinging quickly through the city "We just took care of an electric man who says he was juiced by Oscorp... I figured Oscorp was up to some shifty stuff but I didn't think they'd have started human testing yet" He landed on the side of a building and stick to it, looking down over the illuminated city.

"Hold up, I'm getting ahead of myself here, I'm talking as if I had a clue what was going on at Oscorp, all I knew about was that they had some freaky-deaky spiders brewed up and one of them bit me" he corrected "If... if they've got more stuff like that in there then I need to find out about it" With that he oriented himself to remember where the Oscorp building was before throwing himself off the side, plummeting down to the ground before shooting a web onto a nearby building and swinging forwards rapidly. The journey to Oscorp took no longer than a few minutes, his entry to the building being made easier through a side vent on the wall.

"Alright" he whispered under his breath "Sector Seven was closed off last time, which is where they kept the spiders, so I'm guessing they keep their other diabolical instruments and creations there" It was after hours in the Oscorp building and on top of that they'd all been evacuated after the attack from the talking Christmas light earlier. He removed a cover on one of the vents and dropped down to the ground, lowering himself into a low and spread out crouch, surveying the area before moving forward.

"Where am I now?" he asked quietly.

"Somewhere you're not supposed to be" an angry female voice said behind him. His Spider-Sense flared up and he threw himself forward just in time to dodge a kick from a blue-haired woman with fury in her eyes. Spider-Man landed on his hands to soften his roll but the woman moved faster than he'd expected her to. She had landed on her other foot before pivoting on it, without lowering the other one, and attempted a spinning kick. Spider-Man ducked underneath the attack but once again the woman showed an expertise with martial arts he'd never seen before. As soon as she finished her rotation she bent her knee before leaping into the air and coming down with a powerful overhead kick.

"Holy fuck!" Spider-Man yelled, throwing himself to the side once more in a pitiful dodge, having to remain on the defensive the entire time. The woman slammed her heel into the ground, performing the splits before pulling her legs back together and using the friction gained to push herself back up to her feet. Spider-Man stood up straight and bent his legs, ready to pounce away if he needed to.

"Wait..." he said in shock upon seeing the woman's face "Luna?"

"That's Princess Luna to you" she snarled.

"Why are you here?" he asked her.

"I could ask you the same thing" she said, her blue eyes bright and angry "You're trespassing on private property, leave now"

"I can't, I need to get deeper into the building to-" he began only to be cut off by a furious princess dashing towards him. She thrusted her palm forwards in an attempt to knock Spider-Man off balance but he caught her wrist.

"Ha!" he yelled. It was at this moment that he realized just how badly he'd under-estimated Luna. Displaying strength far superior to his she lifted her arm high above her head and, with a quick pivot on her heel, she threw him over her shoulder and into the wall down the corridor. Spider-Man used his webbing to slow his movement before landing on his feet on the wall, dropping into a low crouch only to have Luna's boot catch him in the back of the head. She had followed him up the corridor after throwing him and had once again flipped herself over and brought her heel down in an overhead kick, this time making contact. Stars flashed in Peter's eyes as his head was knocked down, only sticking to the wall through instinct rather than will. He threw an awkward punch at Luna only to have her grab his hand and yank him forward. His fingers did not come away from the wall but small chips of the wall and paint remained stuck to his fingers as Luna's incredible strength tore him free.

"What the hell?" Spider-Man asked before Luna adjusted her hand placement and grabbed him by the throat, shoving him back up against the wall "Get off me!"

"You're not supposed to be here" Luna stated.

"I know that" Spider-Man coughed, his oxygen supply running low.

"Then why are you?" she demanded.

"I'm trying to help" Spider-Man choked. Luna rolled her eyes and placed her hand on his head, tightening her fingers around the top of his mask.

"I've heard that many times before, from another one who acted as you do, Daredevil was his name I believe, a cripple in a red rubber suit who tried to make a difference" Luna growled, beginning to slowly slide Spider-Man's mask off his face "I never found out who he was so I could never track him down, you however, aren't going to get the benefit of my mistake" Spider-Man's mouth had been revealed and Luna was preparing to yank the mask off completely when a gloved hand landed on her arm.

"Drop him Luna" the familiar, deep voice ordered.

"I don't answer to you Fury" Luna spat "Get out of here" It was then Luna seemed to notice the barrel of a handgun being pressed against her head.

"And I don't answer to you, let go of him" Fury stated.

"Get that gun away from me or I swear I'll-" Luna began only to be cut off as the sound of fury cocking the gun echoed in her ear.

"You'll what?" Fury asked "You're fast Luna, but I don't think you're fast enough to move your arm before I can move my finger"

"You wouldn't dare" she hissed, her eyes darting to Fury.

"Why wouldn't I?" Fury asked "I'm the Director of S.H.I.E.L.D, and thanks to the agreement that you signed my organisation and I operate above and out of your jurisdiction, as you do ours" Luna looked back at Spider-Man once more before sighing, dropping him to the floor and holding up her hands.

"Fine, he's not worth it anyway" Luna growled, turning around and walking back through the corridor. Fury chuckled, putting his gun away and extending his hand to Spider-Man.

"You good, kid?" Fury asked.

"Yeah" Spider-Man nodded "I'm sick of getting my ass kicked today" Spider-Man took his hand and pulled himself up, pulling his mask back down over his face and setting it back into its proper resting place.

"Did you expect to beat her on your first try?" Fury asked.

"I shouldn't have?" Spider-Man asked.

"Hell no boy, Luna's a category five mutant and on top of that one of the best fighters in the world" Fury laughed, clapping Spider-Man on the back and guiding him forwards "She's been alive for over six thousand years and has seen the creation of most forms of martial arts in existence and mastered each and every one of them in her travels around the world"

"What?" Spider-Man asked in shock "Seriously, all of them?"

"All of them, she's a master in hand-to-hand and armed combat, short, mid and long range firearms as well as an explosives expert and master survivalist" Fury continued "She helped train Captain America after he first got his super-powers and stands as our shining example of perfect soldier" Spider-Man stared down the corridor at Luna who had stopped to talk to someone, the voice too far away to make out.

"But I thought Celestia was stronger than Luna" Spider-Man commented.

"In terms of sheer strength, yes, Celestia outdoes her sister, but Celestia didn't train for nearly as long and nowhere as hard as Luna did... if I had to put money on it I'd say Celestia would come out on top if she could land maybe twenty solid hits consecutively on Luna but I'm damn sure Luna could run rings around Celestia without taking so much as a hit from her" Fury added.

"Christ" Spider-Man said in awe.

"So, moral of the story is don't piss her off" Fury smirked "Now let's go talk to our good friend Norman Osborn" The two of them walked up to where Luna was standing and discovered that she was talking to Celestia, who seemed very surprised to see Spider-Man.

"Oh" she said, putting a hand to her mouth "I didn't expect to find you here"

"Yeah, neither did I to be honest" Spider-Man nodded.

"Can we make this quick?" an irritated voice asked from across the room. They turned to see Norman Osborn standing against a desk with a glass of scotch in his hand. He looked up and noticed Spider-Man for the first time.

"Ahhh, so this is the infamous Spider-Man I've been hearing about is it?" he asked, walking towards the group "I've been very interested in you young man, they say you can do incredible things"

"I can do whatever a spider can" Spider-Man shrugged "But this isn't about me, I'm guessing my friends here are asking you to explain that little bundle of fun we had to play with outside... well, I did, they just sat back and watched" Luna rolled her eyes angrily before stepping forward and looking down on Osborn.

"So tell us Norman, where did it come from and why did it want to kill you?" Luna demanded. Osborn glared at Luna for a long second before taking a sip from his scotch.

"He came from one of the Delta labs upstairs, they work on renewable energy sources for the benefit of the environment" Norman said "I don't know exactly who he was but my guess is that he got to close to our new breed of electric eels"

"Eels?" Spider-Man asked with a scoff "That sounds dumb"

"I wouldn't expect you to understand the benefits of them" Norman said in his own scoffing tone.

"Actually I think I do, having an animal instead of a generator or piece of complex machinery means that you don't need to spend money on maintaining or repairing it, they're smaller and much easier to transport and they're easier to dispose of once they're dead" Spider-Man suggested.

"Something like that" Norman said "Tell me, do you have any idea how I might've made them into living generators?" Spider-Man thought for a second before nodding his head.

"Normally I would say that you reworked their bio-electric energy by amplifying the charge of the electrons and protons in their atomic make-up in order to make them produce more electricity" Spider-Man began "And then because of the links the atoms had to each other their entire build-up would've been electrically charged..." Spider-Man took a deep breath before continuing on his scientific rant.

"But, due to the fact that the electric eel already has three abdominal organs able to produce electricity naturally you simply did a little bit of genetic modification while they were in their embryonic stages in order to get their organs to constantly produce the electricity at a higher wattage" he finished. Osborn looked at Spider-Man for a long second before clapping quietly with an impressed smile.

"Now that surprised me... I didn't expect you to have such an incredible intellect" he congratulated "You wouldn't mind trying to spread some of that intelligence to my boy Harry would you, the boy can work a room but he needs to be as smart, if not smarter, than me if he wants this company to grow further"

"Alright, enough of this" Luna said, clearly sick of the scientific babble "How would the electric eels have turned him into some kind of bio-electric generator instead of just killing them like normal eels would have?" Norma stared angrily at Luna, speaking through gritted teeth as he answered her.

"As of right now, Your Majesty, I am unsure, the lab was destroyed by that lunatic, as were the eels and the scientists who worked on them" Osborn answered.

"And call me crazy for saying this, but I'm sure a multi-billion dollar project like that would've taken extensive notes, photos and documents on the research in case such a thing happened" Luna remarked.

"Which we have, but since the alarm went off today in the building both the data storage hardware and Oscorp's personal cloud system have been shut down for security reasons and won't come back online until tomorrow at noon" Osborn explained "I'm sorry that I couldn't be more help now but I'm going to have to ask you to return tomorrow and I'll try to figure out what the issue was" Luna stared for a second longer before moving away from Osborn.

"Very well" she nodded "Twelve sharp Osborn, we'll be back"

"I look forward to it" Norma said, feigning a polite tone. They left the room and closed the door, Spider-Man noticing Luna's hands clenching down by her sides. Celestia noticed her reaction too and placed a hand on her shoulder, smiling softly. Luna shook off her hand and stormed away from the others.

"Wow, that's a dick move" Spider-Man noted.

"She's angry" Celestia said to him softly "She just needs time"

"Why? I get that people died today but it's not like it's her fault or anything" Spider-Man asked.

"Because she takes her responsibility as co-ruler and peace keeper very seriously and she often blames herself for the loss of innocent lives" Celestia answered "She tries her best to help people"

"Then why did she attack me?" Spider-Man asked.

"I... I wasn't aware she had" Celestia said in surprise "I'll talk to her about that, but, I feel that she may have done it because she has a strong dislike of people taking the law into their own hands, she believes that vigilantes only seem to add to the trouble and danger in the world"

"But... we try to help people, not hurt them" Spider-Man countered.

"Yes, but some vigilantes are more extreme than others, while you try not to kill there are heroes like Wolverine and the Punisher whose method of saving innocents is to slaughter those who try to harm them" Celestia replied.

"They might see it as the best way" Spider-Man shrugged.

"Even if they do, the law does not" Celestia said "As we've seen many times before, a small group of people doing something different can lead to a whole village, town, city or nation following suit"

"Like how in high school when the popular kids get a new piece of clothing everyone else feels like they need to get it themselves?" Spider-Man suggested. Celestia looked at him with a puzzled expression for a long moment, a question between her lips, before asking it.

"How old are you?"

"That's... a weird question, why d'you need to know?" Spider-Man asked.

"Because I find it very strange that the first example you went to was the social status in a schooling environment instead of something like celebrities picking something and having their fans follow them, or a sportsman performing a certain warm-up exercise and then have his fellow team mates copy him... to me that shows a lack of experience in the cultural, or adult, world" Celestia explained "And those without much experience in that kind of world are usually very young" Spider-Man was silent for a brief second before coming up with an excuse.

"Sorry, it's just that the conversation I had with Osborn back there got my mind thinking about high school science and then high school itself, I was in my teenage brain mode for a second there" he answered.

"Of course" Celestia nodded, not completely convinced but deciding to withhold further questions.


Osborn sat down at his desk with an angry expression, filling his scotch glass and quickly downing it. There came a ringing from his office phone. He considered ignoring it for a second before deciding it could be important. He picked up the phone and held it against his ear.

"Osborn" he stated.

"Greetings Mr Osborn" a deep, rough voice said in a chuckling tone "I was hoping I could reach you tonight"

"Who is this?" Osborn asked, unwilling to partake in pleasantries.

"Not so fast Mr Osborn, I wish to ask you a question first" the voice said "Are you aware that you've been placed under investigation by the NYPD?"

"Until now, no, I wasn't" Osborn answered "Is there a point to this conversation or are you just wasting my time?"

"Indeed there is my friend, with the recent unfortunate incident at your tower the NYPD now will have enough evidence to get a search warrant for your workplace and as we both know, that would surely lead to them uncovering your... less desirable projects" the voice continued.

"I don't know what you're talking about" Osborn said in a droll tone "Goodbye"

"You mean those photos, videos and recorded phone calls with the mole I placed in your company aren't real?" the voice said in a faux surprised tone "Such a shame that this little beauty isn't real" There then came a recording of Osborn himself speaking to his head scientist Otto Octavius about their gene splicing machine and how four of the five test subjects had died during their initial tests. Osborn gritted his teeth angrily, tightening his grip on the phone.

"Alright, what do you want from me?" Osborn demanded.

"I wish to make a deal, I'll use my contacts to keep the police off your scent for as long as I can as long as you promise to use that little splicing machine for me when it's completed" he offered.

"Who are you?" Osborn asked again.

"I can't give you my name, but my associate Hammerhead will be visiting your penthouse at twenty-one hundred hours tomorrow night, make sure you're there" the voice said "So do we have a deal?"

"I don't really have a choice do I?" Osborn asked "But, you never told me what you wanted the splicing machine for"

"I'll use it in a way that'll be beneficial for us both, I promise" the voice said before hanging up. Osborn stared at the phone for a long moment before placing it back on the hook.

"What the hell did I just get myself into?" he growled, pouring himself another drink and downing that quickly.

Complications

Twilight sat next to a pile of empty spray paint cans with a book between her legs, eagerly reading one of her favourite fantasy novels, Brisingr. Behind her was an enormous spray tagging of Spider-Man's spider symbol, the one on his back more specifically, a large, angular and long legged arachnid with thin and sharp legs. She'd been sat there for just over an hour and had thought out her plan rather well in her opinion. She only needed the big piece to come together which was Spider-Man showing up to begin with. She hoped that she didn't have to wait much longer as it was starting to get very late and her thermos had already run out of the hot chocolate she'd prepared earlier.

"Come on man, where are you?" she asked aloud, looking out into the dark sky as the wind whipped her back-length hair around wildly "I've got things I need to be doing"

"And you think I don't?" a voice asked from behind her. Twilight whipped around to see Spider-Man sticking to the wall above her and looking down at her "Shouldn't you be at home in bed?" Twilight smiled sweetly as she stood up and dusted off the seat of her pants.

"Yeah, but you should be as well right?" she asked him, walking towards the wall.

"I would've been if you didn't call me out here" Spider-Man said, leaping down in front of her. Twilight looked him over quickly and checked off the points on the list she had made.

"Height: check, build: check, speech patterns: check, attitude: check and damn near identical voice: double check" she thought to herself "Come on Peter, are you even trying at this point?"

"Sorry, but I really wanted to see you" Twilight said, twirling her hair around her finger and looking at him with a sheepish-yet-seductive smile.

"Why?" Spider-Man asked.

"At Cadance's party, you saved us all and..." Twilight said, stepping forward and placing the tips of her fingers against his chest "I never got to thank you properly"

"You don't have to thank me" Spider-Man said, thought a chink in his armour had been shown at a shift in pitch and speaking pattern.

"This is going to be much easier than I thought" she thought to herself "But, I feel like I need to" Twilight, beforehand, had applied lip gloss and a small amount of eye shadow, using it to make her feminine attraction level increase dramatically. She moved her hand from his chest to his face, stroking his cheek with her thumb as she gave him a very sultry look.

"What are you-" he began to say before she placed a finger on his face where his mouth was under the mask.

"Don't worry, I'm just saying thank you" she giggled, licking her lips as she pulled his mask up to his nose "Now hold still" Twilight stood to her full height and leaned forwards, puckering her shiny lips as she moved her mouth closer to his.

"Twilight..." Spider-Man mumbled.

"Peter" she stated smugly, moving her hand up to the top of his head and yanking the mask off before he could react. She quickly spun away from him and stuffed it down her shirt under her jacket to make sure he wasn't getting the mask back any time soon.

"Twilight!" Peter snapped, attempting to cover his face with his hands only to have Twilight laugh at him.

"I knew it!" she laughed "And wow was that easier than I thought it was gonna be, for a second there I thought you actually wanted to..." Twilight trailed off before finishing the sentence, realizing that she had just pulled an extremely dirty trick on Peter, but also at the fact Peter seemed quite eager to kiss her.

"Peter... did you want... to kiss me?" Twilight asked. Peter dropped his hands down to his sides and shrugged with a sigh.

"I don't know... I was just hoping that..." Peter mumbled. Twilight stepped closer towards him, this time sincerely.

"Hoping what Peter?" she asked, her heart rate increasing dramatically as butterflies formed in her stomach "That I would kiss you?" Peter was silent and unmoving, refusing to meet Twilight's eyes until she put a hand to his face.

"I'm sorry Peter... I didn't mean to, ugh what am I saying?" she asked herself, dropping her hand and turning away from him "I thought this was just a one time thing"

"Thought what was?" Peter asked, putting a hand on her shoulder.

"I thought that when I kissed you in that changing room that it was just something hormonal... something suppressible" Twilight sighed, taking Peter's hand from her shoulder and holding it "But... I-I... I can't help it" She used her grip on him to pull him closer to her, placing both of her hands on his chest and smiling weakly at him.

"I just..." she muttered before her voice failed her "Peter, please try to tell me what I want to say" Peter quickly wrapped his arms around her waist and leaned down, locking lips with her for a long moment. Twilight's cheeks flushed red as she pushed her tongue into his mouth, wrapping her arms around his neck and hugging him tightly. Twilight's heart began to pound with such ferocity she would be surprised if Peter couldn't feel it through his own. But despite her immense joy at this situation she couldn't help a tear rolling down her cheek. The two broke away from each other and Peter noticed the tear lines on Twilight's cheeks.

"What's wrong?" he asked in a worried tone.

"Harry" was all she said. It then suddenly dawned in Peter that he had just kissed his best friend's girlfriend. He put a hand to his face and sighed angrily before looking at Twilight.

"Shit, Twi, I'm really sorry" Peter said "I completely forgot-"

"You need to help him!" Twilight blurted out, catching Peter off guard.

"What do you mean?" Peter asked "Help him with what?"

"He... he made me promise not to tell you but he's been... been drinking something he stole from Oscorp" Twilight answered.

"What?!" Peter snapped, grabbing hold of her shoulders "Why haven't you told anyone about this!?" Twilight winced in pain from the strength of Peter's grasp and upon realizing this he released her.

"Sorry... I forgot sometimes hos strong I am, especially when I'm mad" Peter sighed.

"It's alright" Twilight nodded, closing her eyes and exhaling slowly. Her emotions returned to their usual state and she got her rational attitude back "What we need to do is talk to him, he made me promise not to tell anyone but since I've already broken that promise I might as well just give up the ghost and get help"

"You talk to his mom and I'll talk to him" Peter nodded "She should still be working at her I.T firm now, she always works late"

"Right" Twilight said decisively "We'll meet at the stairs in Times Square tomorrow and see how well this goes" Twilight turned to walk away before Peter called her back.

"Yes?" she asked impatiently.

"You've still got my mask" Peter said with a point of his finger. Twilight looked down at her chest and smirked awkwardly.

"Oh right, yeah" she said, pulling it out and throwing it to him "Sorry"

"It's alright... but, how did you figure out it was me?" Peter asked.

"Easily, your voice is a dead give away, you don't try to hide or disguise your voice or anything" Twilight said "I've noticed in psychology that even slight changes or adjustments can easily throw people off as to who you are so try a different voice or something, maybe even a thicker accent"

"Right, I'll go for a thick New York one, making it sound much cockier might help to" Peter nodded.

"Another thing was that you act the same way in and out of your costume, you should do what Superman does when he's Clark Kent, act less hot-headed and try to keep the jokes down to a minimum and you should be fine" Twilight said "And finally, use block capitals when you leave your notes, my biggest hint was the letters you sent me and through them I matched your handwriting"

"OK, thanks Twi" Peter said, pulling the mask over his face and nodding "I'll give you a ride to Mrs Osborn's place"

"Good idea, that'll be much quicker than walking" Twilight said with a smile "Thanks Pete"

"No problem, now get on, we've got work to do"

Clarification

Peter's breathing was strangely loud in the seemingly dead apartment complex. His steps had created a thumping, rhythmic beat as he trudged up the cold stairs. His mind was alive with the several different scenarios he was imagining, of what this serum could be doing to Harry and, most importantly, the serum itself was. Twilight hadn't given many details on the serum, most likely as she wasn't aware of it's full use herself, and this lead Peter to worry. His eyes caught the change of scenery as he got higher in the complex, the cold and blank grey walls being replaced with expensive, cut and stylized wooden planks, glossed and maintained to their best quality. He reached the top, and largest, floor of the complex and whistled loudly. He had been to Harry's penthouse, the Osborn Mini-Manor as he often called it, and the mere outside of it never failed to amaze him. The wooden walls surrounded a large and strong oak door, reinforced by thick rods placed into the wood that, at a moment's notice, could be deployed into the door frame to make it near impossible to breach through it, acting as the first line of defence to the modern day castle that lay before him.

"Alright Harry" Peter mumbled under his breath, approaching the door and removing his hand from his pocket "Please don't do anything stupid" With restrained strength Peter knocked on the thick door, the sound lacking a rattle of the door due to its tight fastening.

"Harry?" Peter called out, the echo of the stairwell no longer affecting his voice due to his distance from the area "It's Peter, you in there?" There was a moment of silence, the seconds slowly ticking by, before a reply came from the other side of the door.

"Hey buddy" Harry's voice said in a beaming tone "Gimme a sec" Their came the sound of complicated locks and chains being turned and slid back before the doorknob twisted and the door swung open, revealing Harry standing tall with a grin on his face.

"Hey Pete" Harry said happily. Peter looked at him with a critical eye for a long second, unsure of his true emotions, before nodding his head.

"Hey Harr" he grinned.

"It's a bit late dude, what d'you need?" Harry asked, drumming his fingers on the side of the door.

"You got a minute to talk?" Peter asked calmly. Harry checked his watch, judging the time, before nodding his head and swinging the door open wide.

"Sure, come on in" Harry said, holding his arm out in a sweeping gesture. Peter smirked and walked into the penthouse, seeing the two storey, furnished and extravagantly expensive apartment illuminated by the large and powerful ceiling lights.

"You not ready for bed yet man?" Peter asked as he kicked off his shoes, a trait both the Parker and Osborn families agreed on, and walked up the small staircase to where the kitchen and living room section of the apartment was.

"Nah, not yet" Harry said as he followed after Peter, stuffing his hands into his jeans pockets "I just got my hands on a copy of Destiny and I figured I'd pull an all-nighter on it" Peter scoffed loudly as they reached the kitchen. Harry raised an eyebrow at his friends reaction as he walked over to the large fridge. He swung the cooler system open and pulled out two cans of Pepsi Max, sliding one over to Peter who took it and walked over to the sink.

"What's so bad about Destiny?" Harry asked as he cracked the can open and took a loud sip from it.

"Try just about everything except the shooting" Peter chuckled, washing the top of his can and drying it with a dish cloth.

"Oh?" Harry asked in a challenging tone "Name three things wrong with the game Mr Angry Joe"

"Well, for one thing, the story was awful" Peter said, cracking open the can and taking a sip himself "Secondly, the constant use of defending the Dinklage-Droid as he has to unlock something, that got extremely repetitive really quickly and the loot system was terribly done" Harry set his can down under a coaster and leaned onto the marble top of the breakfast bar the kitchen had.

"Is that it?" Harry asked jokingly.

"What d'you mean is that it?" Peter laughed "That's all there was to that game"

"Still better than The Evil Within though?" Harry asked, knowing about his friend's hatred for that game. Peter turned to him with a disgusted look and Harry nearly choked on his drink from laughter.

"Alright then, I'll stop" Harry sighed "So, what did you want to talk about again?" Peter took a moment to try and formulate a way to word his question, finding the best way to start the conversation.

"I heard from someone that you've been taking some kind of performance enhancer" Peter said slowly. Harry looked at his best friend with a puzzled expression, setting down his drink after another sip, before seemingly realizing what Peter was talking about.

"Oh, the blood cell enhancer" Harry said with a slow nod, swilling his drink around in his hand with a roll of his wrist.

"Is that what it is?" Peter asked "I thought it might have been something a lot more..." Peter trailed off as he saw the comforting smile from his friend.

"Nah, it's nothing to worry about" Harry said confidently "It's not anything worse than a flu jab" Peter looked at him with his own puzzled expression, trying to think of what Harry meant. Harry seemed to catch Peter's meaning behind his look and elaborated.

"I mean that it strengthens and amplifies the production of antibodies by the white blood cells in the blood stream so when it fights infection it's able to fight them off more efficiently and adapt to them" Harry explained "Because I get sick a lot my Dad whipped up something to strengthen my immune system so I stop getting sick all the time" Peter looked down at his drink, seeing the froth of the cola inside beginning to bubble away. Harry's explanation seemed reasonable enough and he sounded confident about what he was saying, sounded like he was telling the truth. Peter nodded his head slowly before looking up at him again.

"Alright, if you say so" he agreed "But you're sure there aren't any bad side effects to it?"

"Not that I've been told about, it was tested and approved by the pharmaceutical board so I'm guessing its safe" Harry shrugged, taking another drink of Pepsi "There's nothing to worry about Peter, I promise" The two of them looked at each other for a brief second before Peter nodded.

"If you're sure" Peter agreed.

"Where did you hear about it anyway?" Harry asked "I only told one other person about it... did Twilight tell you?"

"Yeah, she seemed really worried about it for some reason" Peter nodded.

"I don't know why, I told her the same thing I told you and she seemed fine about it the last time I saw her" Harry said with a confused gesture.

"When did you last see her?" Peter asked, drinking again.

"Oh... two days ago in math class" Harry said "I... I think" Harry put a hand to his face and rubbed his eyes gently, causing Peter a brief spat of worry.

"You alright there buddy?" Peter asked, moving slightly closer to his friend.

"Yeah, yeah I'm fine" Harry nodded "Just a little tired is all" At this point Peter became slightly suspicious, he knew that Harry had a great memory and that he wouldn't forget when he last saw a friend, much less his own girlfriend. Still, he thought, he might just be tired and have a slight memory lapse.

"I think you should probably head to bed dude" Peter suggested "You've got school tomorrow" Harry looked up at him with a grin, though Peter could see a faint glint of pain behind his smile.

"I guess" Harry said "I just wish I got a few months away from school like you did" Peter scoffed loudly, looking at his friend with a wide grin.

"Yeah, just get into a fight with the biggest bully in school and we can do nothing but hang out and play video games until Christmas if you want" Peter chuckled. The two of them laughed for a few seconds before Harry looked back up at Peter.

"Say, you never did tell me how you managed to fight like that" Harry commented.

"What d'you mean?" Peter asked.

"You were doing all kinds of crazy ninja shit that entire time, I've never seen you do anything like that before" Harry explained "Where did that come from anyway?"

"I have no idea really" Peter shrugged "I think it left just as quickly as it came" Harry looked at his watch before yawning loudly, rubbing his eyes again. Peter finished his drink in a few more gulps before throwing it into an open trash box across the kitchen.

"Right, there's the sign that you want me to fuck off, so fuck off I shall" Peter smirked.

"I didn't mean it like that Peter" Harry laughed "But if you wanna head out then sure" Harry stood up and walked his friend back to the door.

"Say, are you busy tomorrow?" Peter asked "If not, I figured we could hang out and do something" Harry shook his head with a sorry expression before speaking up.

"Sorry dude, Twilight and I made plans to go watch a movie after school" Harry said "Then we were going to get something to eat afterwards"

"Ah, and we both know I'd just be a third wheel" Peter nodded, slightly bummed out about the ordeal.

"Sorry man" Harry said, clapping his friend on the back "Maybe next time?"

"Sure, yeah" Peter agreed as he pulled his shoes back on "I'll see you around" Harry held the door open for his friend and moved aside for him to exit.

"See ya buddy" Harry nodded "Sorry for worrying you"

"No biggie" Peter shrugged as he headed out of the door "I'll talk to you later"

"Right" Harry grinned "Don't get run over on your way home"

"I won't" Peter chuckled. Harry closed the door behind Peter and locked it again, sliding the chain back into position.

"Right..." he said in a pondering tone "Destiny or bed?"

Missed Appointments and Bail-outs

"A nine PM curfew!?" Spider-Man snapped, web swinging over a car and landing on the back of a sixteen wheeler "How the hell am I supposed to do this and keep to a nine PM curfew!?" He sat with his legs crossed and his arms folded, scowling furiously underneath his mask as the city moved past him. After he'd gotten home an hour later than he'd supposed to, May had said that she was unable to trust him any more and had limited him to a nine PM curfew until she was able to trust him to stay out longer, as well as having to call her at three PM and and eight PM in order to tell her where he was, what he was doing and, in the case of the second call, how close he was to coming home. He'd been furious about the new restriction and knew that it was going to affect his superhero life, but at the same time he knew that he'd worried his Aunt May and angry or not he knew that he was in the wrong. Looking ahead of him he was able to see a traffic jam and he then decided it was better to start swinging again. As he swung through the air he grumbled several sentences under his breath, going through his mental to-do list for that day.

"I've wasted too much time on menial shit, I need to get back on the trail of the Big Man" he said, angling his body to swing around a corner before firing another web "Where to start with that... I'm guessing the people who know the most about the Big Man would be the police... so I better pay a visit to Captain Armour first and see where we can go from there" Spider-Man used his photographic memory to remember where Shining's house was, or apartment, he corrected and once again changed the direction he was going. He knew that he was wanted by the police but he hoped that Shining would be reasonable enough to listen to him and be willing to help him out.

"It's a risk, a risk for both of us" Spider-Man sighed "But I get the feeling that I'll be able to talk him round and get him to help me out... at least I hope so" The distance reduced as the minutes went by and soon enough Spider-Man landed on the balcony of the penthouse Shining and Cadance lived in.

"Why is it that everybody I know lives in really expensive penthouses?" Spider-Man asked himself quietly. He knocked on the glass door of the penthouse and jumped up onto the railing of the balcony, resting in his usual high-knee crouch with his fingers stabilizing him as he rested on the post. Several seconds went by before Shining came into view, looking at Spider-Man with a peculiar gaze. He slid the door open and walked out to the balcony, leaning against it with his back and resting his elbows against the railings.

"You do know that I'm supposed to arrest you, right?" Shining asked.

"I am aware of that fact Captain" Spider-Man nodded "But I've got something to say that might make you change your mind"

"Which would be?" Shining asked, raising an eyebrow.

"I think that I can help you track down and arrest the Big Man, if we work together that is" Spider-Man explained. Shining slowly turned his head to look at Spider-Man, a look of amused disbelief on his face as he spoke.

"And what makes you think I need your help?" Shining asked "I've done fine with just my squad and my intuition"

"Uh, no disrespect meant Captain, but you didn't even know the name of the Big Man before I came along, you'd been working on the case for a long time with no leads" Spider-Man stated "And with me being on the scene for five minutes I managed to get one of his grunts to talk, I'd say that you do need my help" Shining angled his head to the floor, nodding slowly before sighing and looking up.

"Alright, maybe I could use your help" Shining agreed "But if you're going to help me then we're doing this by my rules"

"Which would be?"

"Anything I say, you do, you follow my orders to a T and never question a thing I tell you to do" Shining listed "I outrank you and I'm the one that'll be keeping the rest of the force off your back, remember that" Spider-Man nodded slowly, chuckling to himself before looking back at Shining.

"Right, that seems horrendously unfair but I'll go with it" he agreed "So Boss-Man, what's our first move?"

"Well, we've had a tip from an anonymous source that the Big Man has two employees that he trusts above all others, now we don't know the name of his second in command but we've got a partial I.D on his third in command-" Shining said "Come on in and I'll tell you what we know" Spider-Man followed after Shining as he walked inside his house, shutting the glass door behind him and walking into the living room. Cadance was sitting on the floor wearing a pink sweater and loose-fitting pajama bottoms with bunnies on them, her hair tied up in a ponytail behind her head with a pair of circular glasses on. She looked up, noticing her husband first and then looking extremely surprised to see Spider-Man.

"Uh, Shiny" Cadance said "What's Spider-Man doing here?"

"He's here to help out with the Big Man case" Shining answered, walking over to her and kneeling down, kissing her on the cheek "You don't mind him being here do you?"

"No, I just wish that I was dressed properly is all" Cadance sighed.

"Don't worry, you look beautiful anyway" Shining said, standing up and walking around the corner and into his office. Spider-Man looked down at the floor, only then noticing that Cadance was trying to complete a jigsaw puzzle, having done about two tenths of it already.

"Slow day?" Spider-Man asked.

"Extremely" Cadance nodded "The internet's been down all day and I'm bored with all my books"

"Huh, you should try playing video games, it's a good pass-time" Spider-Man shrugged.

"I could never get into them, the controller just threw me off every time" Cadance said with a shake of her head.

"Alright" Shining said, walking back into the living room with a brown file in his hand "This is everything we've got on her"

"Her?" Spider-Man asked.

"Yeah" Shining nodded, handing the file to him "Her" Spider-Man opened the file and began to flick through it, spotting a regrettably familiar outline.

"Black Cat" he sighed, taking out a photo from the file. The image was extremely blurry and had been taken from quite the distance but he could tell it was her from the body shape.

"You know her name?" Shining asked in a surprised tone.

"Not her real one, she's the one that got me framed for robbing that jewellery store a few days ago" Spider-Man nodded "I knew that she worked for the Big Man but I didn't think she was that high in his chain"

"Neither did we, we're not completely sure to be honest, but we've got a strong hunch that she organizes and commits most of the major thefts of single items while his second in command organizes the large-scale robberies and heists" Shining said "In the file's a list of all her different heists and jobs but besides what she's done, we've got no information on her"

"Maybe I could try and find something out about her" Spider-Man suggested.

"A good idea, but until we get a real name or anything close to an identification, we've got nothing to go on" Shining sighed.

"You haven't tried planting a mole in his organization?" Spider-Man asked.

"We tried, but no one was brave or stupid enough to agree to do it" Shining said.

"I could try, I think I could look after myself" Spider-Man offered.

"Wouldn't work, you've proven yourself to be a good guy, he'd never trust you with anything crucial" Shining said with a shake of his head.

"Right, I never thought of that" Spider-Man nodded. He looked around the room with his arms folded for a long second before an shaking his head.

"I've got nothing" he growled irritably, dropping his arms down to his sides in frustration.

"Me either... I tell you what, I'll give you a few files on a couple guys we've got our eyes on and we'll work something out from there" Shining said.

"Sounds good" Spider-Man nodded.

"I'll be back in a sec" Shining agreed, walking back into his office quickly.

"I think you two are going to make a good team" Cadance said with a small smile.

"D'you think?" Spider-Man asked.

"Yeah... just look after him for me, alright?" Cadance asked.

"I will, promise" Spider-Man nodded.

"Good, I'll hold you to that" Cadance chuckled, setting about her jigsaw again. Shining came back out with a small pile of files under his arm, handing them over to Spider-Man as he began to speak.

"Right, these files have got everything we know about some high profile targets that work for the Big Man, they're suspects but they're also too good to slip up" Shining explained "Go through a few of them and see what ideas you can come up with"

"Right, I will Shining" Spider-Man said "Thanks" The two nodded at each other and after a quick string of goodbyes Spider-Man left the penthouse the same way he came in.


Peter sat with his legs crossed on his bedroom floor, a pen in his mouth and a collection of notes and files around him. He removed the pen from his mouth and jotted down several key locations that had been suspected of shipments being moved and changing hands. He had drawn up a small map on a sheet of paper that he believed mapped out the most popular routes for shipments and gun-running. The most popular area for back-alley business was in, strangely enough, SoHo and this was a place he planned to make a trip to relatively soon. His work was interrupted as his phone began to ring loudly in his pocket. He took out the device and answered the incoming call, this one from Harry.

"Hello?" Peter asked.

"Hey Pete, are you busy right now?" Harry asked. Peter looked at the notes and files all around him with pursed lips before nodding.

"Yeah, quite" he answered "Why, what's up?"

"Nothing important, it's just that Twilight and I talked about you coming to visit me last night to talk about my medication and we both felt bad about you not coming along" Harry answered "But if you're busy it's not too big of a deal" Peter screwed his eyes shut for a long second, debating whether to postpone his work and hang out with his friends or whether he should continue with it to try and stop the Big Man.

"Where are you right now?" Peter asked, making this the deciding question.

"Well we just got off the train to SoHo so we can wait here for you if you want?" Harry answered.

"Bingo" Peter thought triumphantly "On second thought, there's stuff I need to do in SoHo, so yeah, I'll meet you guys there soon, where abouts should we meet?" There was conversation between the two on the other end of the phone before a decision was reached.

"You know the Fanelli Cafe on Mercer Street right?" Harry asked "We'll meet you there"

"Sure, sounds good" Peter nodded "I'll see you there" Peter hung up his phone and stuffed it into his pocket with a smile on his face.

"Well that worked out alright after all, maybe this whole superhero thing won't kill my social life after all" Peter smirked.


Peter stuffed his mask into the bottom of his bag just as he rounded the corner of Mercer Street, seeing the cafe in question and just being able to make out the colours of Twilight's hair in the window.

"Right, in good time there Parker, now I just need to-"

"Somebody stop that guy!" a voice yelled. Peter's head whipped to the side as he saw a man in a ski mask brandishing an Uzi sprinting away from a grocery store at full speed, the owner of the grocery store standing in the doorway waving his arms and yelling. Peter's eyes darted back and forth between the cafe and the robbery before growling angrily and running back into the alley.

Twilight's head moved to the side just in time to catch what she thought was her friend disappearing into an alley. Her puzzled look got the attention of her boyfriend who looked past her with his own confused expression.

"What's up Twi?" he asked. Twilight looked for a second longer before shaking her head and turning back to her boyfriend.

"Nothing Harr" she said with a smile, tugging on the sleeve of her black sweater.

"Alright... if you insist" Harry said slowly, knowing that Twilight wasn't sharing something with him but deciding to drop it "So, you need a refill on your coffee?"

"I'm good thanks Harr" Twilight said politely "I've already had two, I get another one and I'll be sticking to the ceiling all night"

"That would be interesting to say the least" Harry chuckled "I know one thing that makes me go insane is energy drinks, I remember the first time I had one and it did not end well"

"Why, what happened?" Twilight asked, wrapping her hands around her empty mug.

"I'd rather not say, but what I will say was that involved me, a radiator and the Jaws of Life" Harry said mysteriously.

"Damn, sounds painful" Twilight commented.

"It was" Harry nodded, checking his watch "Isn't Peter supposed to be here by now?"

"Yeah, he said he wouldn't be too long" Twilight agreed. There suddenly came the sound of the cafe door swinging wide open and someone rushing inside.

"This might be-" Harry began before a loud gunshot interrupted him. There came a loud scream from a woman followed by a loud yell.

"Everybody get the fuck down now!" the man brandishing a gun yelled before turning around and aiming at the windows "You hear me freak, you come in here and they all die!" Harry, seemingly prepared for this kind of situation, moved around the table of the booth they were in and grabbed hold of Twilight's shoulder.

"Get under the table" he ordered.

"Harry, what are you-" Twilight began.

"Twilight, now" Harry snapped. Twilight fell silent, ducking under the table and watching as Harry pressed himself against the booth, looking at the man brandishing the gun. He waited silently until the man whipped around, grabbing a blond woman and pulling her over to him, pressing the barrel of the Uzi against her head and screaming.

"You come in here and this bitch if fucking dead freak!" he bellowed. Harry, seeing that the man's back was to him, bolted across the cafe and ducked under another table, grabbing the salt pot from above him and preparing to throw it.

"Easy buddy" came a thick Manhattan accent from outside "There's not need to get violent, just let her go and we can settle this man to man"

"Fuck you freak, there's no way I'm letting you put me back in, I ain't going back to jail!" he yelled, moving the gun away from the woman's head and firing several rounds into the windows "Get the fuck out of here!" Harry, seeing an opportunity, threw the salt pot to the other side of the cafe, the smashing noise causing the gunman to whirl around, away from Harry's direction and fire wildly into the wall where the noise had come from. Harry moved again, sprinting forward silently and leaping over the counter of the cafe, seeing the cashier cowering in fear. The cashier turned to look at him with fear in her eyes.

"You got a gun anywhere?" Harry asked in a hushed tone.

"Y-Yeah, shelf just under the cash register... what are you going to do?" she asked in a terrified tone.

"Stop him" was all he said. Harry silently moved over to the cash register, seeing a black box with a thin clasp on the shelf beneath it. He took the box off the shelf, trying to be as quiet as possible as he opened it. Inside the box was a handgun, a Colt 1911A1, if his training had taught him anything about firearms. He slowly removed the gun from its foam surroundings and removing the magazine. He slid the magazine into the handle of the gun and cocked it, taking the safety off and holding the gun out in front of him with both hands tightly gripping it. He moved to the corner of the counter and peaked around, seeing the man still aiming his gun at the woman's head. He was breathing heavily and his hands were shaking violently.

"Alright..." Harry said, quickly standing up and moving towards the man "Freeze!" The man whipped around and aimed the gun at Harry but upon seeing him he began to laugh nervously.

"Are... are you fucking kidding me?" he asked "You're seriously aiming a gun at me?"

"Let her go" Harry ordered "Or I will shoot" The man looked over his shoulder, obviously more worried about the fact that Spider-Man was still outside.

"Did you send him in freak!?" he bellowed "Getting kids to do your dirty work?!"

"Listen pal, I don't wanna have to shoot you, I want us both to walk away from this unharmed and I sure as hell don't want that poor lady to get hurt" Harry said slowly, the barrel of his gun aimed squarely at the man's head "But if you don't let her go and put the gun down I will shoot you, here and now" The man gritted his teeth in fury, his grip tightening around the woman's throat.

"Do you think that just cause you've got a gun, you think you scare me?" he demanded "I've fought and killed guys five times bigger than you with nothing but my bare hands... if you think that I'm gonna back down to some pint-sized little cunt like you just because you've got a gun then you've got something seriously fucked up in your head, kid"

"I'm warning you, don't make me shoot" Harry said "This is your last chance" The man laughed loudly before scowling furiously.

"How about I shoot you right now?" he demanded, raising the gun up to Harry as he spoke "And then we'll see who the-" There was a loud gunshot followed by the sound of a skull splitting from a bullet wound. The man went limp, allowing the woman to throw herself away from him as the blood began to trickle down his forehead. He fell to the ground with a heavy thump as the last gasp of air left his lungs in a quiet sigh. Harry eased his finger off the trigger and rushed over to the man, kicking the Uzi away from him just as Spider-Man smashed in through the window and looked around.

"What-" he began before he saw the dead man and Harry holding the smoking gun in his hand, the teenager having a stern expression on his face "Holy shit" Harry's face became extremely pale as he put the back of his hand to his mouth to prevent himself from heaving. He threw the gun to the side and stared at the floor for a long moment. Spider-Man walked over to him and placed a hand on his shoulder.

"You alright?" he asked him.

"Y-Yeah... I think so" Harry nodded, cracking his neck and taking a deep breath "Holy fuck"


Harry sat with a blanket around his shoulders in the back of the ambulance, the police and medical services having shown up on the scene several minutes after the man had been shot. Twilight was allowed to see him after being questioned by the police and she ran over to him.

"Harry?" she asked, checking him over with her hands "Thank God you're alright!"

"Yeah... I didn't get hurt or-" he began before Twilight placed her hands on his face and pulled him towards her, locking lips with him as a tear ran down her cheek.

"You scared the shit out of me!" she snapped, only just now realizing how shaken she was. The feeling of relief she felt that Harry was safe was one of the strongest she'd ever felt, a notion that only served to tear her heart in half. She knew that she was dating Harry and she was beginning to care for him more and more everyday while another section of her heart yearned for contact with Peter. The overpowering flux of emotions inside her heart and mind were enough to cause her physical pain as she knew that this would only get her into trouble. She wrapped her arms around Harry and held him close, his arms closing around her chest.

"I don't know what I would've done if you'd gotten hurt" she said, tears still streaming down her face.

"It's alright" Harry chuckled "I'm a little shaken but nothing's damaged, I'm still here and still with you" Twilight rested her face on Harry's shoulder and smiled.

"Good" she stated.

"Hey kid, you're not allowed to be here!" one of the police officers snapped.

"Listen, those two are my friends and I need to talk to them" Peter's voice came from around the ambulance. Twilight stuck her head around the side of the ambulance and saw Peter standing next to a police officer just outside of the police line.

"Peter?" Twilight called out to him. Peter's head turned to Twilight with a smile on his face.

"See, she knows me, can I go in now?" Peter asked. The police officer looked back at Twilight who nodded at her.

"Fine" she said reluctantly "Just don't get in the way" Peter thanked her and rushed over to his friends, seeing Harry sat in the ambulance.

"Shit dude, what happened in there?" Peter asked, pretending to be unaware of what had gone on.

"Some guy came in, grabbed a hostage and threatened to kill her" Harry said quickly "So I got a gun and... and shot him"

"Holy fuck man, you holding up alright?" Peter asked "That shit isn't easy to deal with"

"I'm fine... wait, Peter... how do you know that?" Harry asked, raising an eyebrow at his friend.

"I... uh" Peter mumbled, his eyes dropping down to the ground.

"Fuck, Peter, you... you..." Harry said slowly but upon catching his friend's eye he decided to drop the subject "Yeah, I feel sick to my stomach" Peter stuffed his hands into his jacket pockets and looked up into the air, exhaling slowly. As he was looking up his eyes caught a glimpse of movement on the rooftops, the movements of a sleek figure dressed in black. Peter's body tensed and he recognized the long, white locks of the Black Cat racing along the roofs with trained grace.

"Pete?" Harry asked in a confused tone "You alright?"

"Y-Yeah... listen man, I hope you feel better soon and I'm really sorry this happened" Peter said, moving away from Harry as he spoke.

"Where are you going?" Harry asked.

"That thing I talked about... yeah, I've gotta do that" Peter answered before turning around and hurrying off, ducking into another back alley to change into his costume and go after the Black Cat.

Jolly Co-Operation

Black Cat kept her breath steady and her head held high as she sprinted over rooftop after rooftop, ducking under pipes and leaping over ventilation systems, skidding to a halt at the end of a roof and looking over the edge with a trained gaze. She settled into a low crouch, resting her fingertips on the edge of the roof to support her and allow her to balance more easily. Her attention was taken away from the people moving in the street beneath her by the sound of soft shoes landing on the roof behind her. She looked over her shoulder to see the red and blue clad superhero. A smile touched her lips as she stood up, turning around to face him with her arms held out by her hips.

"Well, hello there Spider" she chuckled "I was hoping I'd run into you sometime soon"

"Why?" Spider-Man asked, settling into a more relaxed stance "Your other punching bags taking their holidays?" Black Cat chuckled, slowly walking closer to him, her hips swaying as she performed a catwalk strut. Spider-Man tensed up quickly and stepped back as she got closer only for her to giggle at his actions.

"Calm down Spider, I'm not going to hurt you" she said "Look, I feel like we got off on the wrong foot the last time we met"

"You think?" Spider-Man asked with a chuckle, relaxing slightly.

"I do, and I was hoping that I'd get a chance to apologize" she continued "So, I'm sorry"

"Right-" Spider-Man said slowly "So you're going to let me arrest you now?"

"Oh goodness no" Black Cat laughed "Why would you want to anyway?"

"Because you work for the Big Man" Spider-Man stated in a matter-of-fact voice "That's kind of a big no-no"

"I don't work for him, I work with him" Black Cat corrected, looking at the tips of her fingers as if to check her nails "Occasionally, that is" She turned around and walked back to the edge of the roof, looking over it.

"Hold up, I thought you were one of his most trusted employees" Spider-Man said, walking towards her "You mean you're not?"

"No, I've never even met him before, no one has" Black Cat chuckled "The only person who knows him is his second in command"

"And that would be?" Spider-Man asked. Black Cat didn't answer, she instead looked over her shoulder and winked at him before leaping off the roof and using her grappling cable to swing away from him.

"Where are you going!?" Spider-Man demanded, leaping after her "I'm still talking to you!"

"I've got an appointment!" Black Cat called back "Hurry up and I might just let you help me"

"Great, another chase" Spider-Man sighed, web-zipping after her as she leaped, jumped and flipped over the rooftops. The two of them moved at great speed, clearing several city blocks in a matter of minutes before Black Cat came to a stop on a rooftop overlooking an enclosed basketball court. Spider-Man landed softly next to her followed by Black Cat pointing down to the court. Spider-Man turned his head to see a small group of Hispanic men dressed in yellow football jerseys talking to another group of men dressed in all black and sunglasses.

"Ah, a drug deal" Spider-Man said "And in broad daylight no less... they're not very professional are they?"

"The Hispanic men aren't, but the guys in black work for the Big Man" Black Cat answered "Any minute now the deal's going to go south, and then the reinforcements the Big Man set up around the block should move in and clean them up"

"Whoa, clean them up?" Spider-Man asked in a horrified tone "That's not gonna happen" He went to move forward only to have Black Cat place a hand on his shoulder, causing him to pause briefly.

"What's so wrong with that?" she asked "That'll be one less group of gangbangers on the street"

"And a group more in the ground, I'm not gonna let that happen" Spider-Man snapped, leaping down into the middle of the court. The men doing the deal all recoiled in shock before reaching into their jackets or pockets and pulling out guns.

"What the fuck man?!" one of the Hispanic men yelled "Who brought this fucker!?"

"Didn't you get the memo?" Spider-Man asked "It was part of the brand new city-wide care package: and for every drug deal we'll throw in a Friendly Neighbourhood Spider-Man for free!"

"You jokin' us here dickhead!?" one of the men in black roared, aiming his gun "Let's see you laugh with lungs fulla lead!" Spider-Man lashed his hand out to the side and shot a web at the man's gun, yanking it away from him before leaping forwards and kicking him in the jaw. The man was knocked down to the floor by the kick and the other men turned and fired. Spider-Man used the force from the kick to propel himself backwards, landing on his shoulder and rolling across the court as bullets cut holes into the ground. Once he was on his front he pushed himself up and back, landing on his feet, before skidding backwards and slamming his elbow into the jaw of another one of the Hispanic men.

"Two down, many more to go" Spider-Man chuckled, dropping low and sweeping the man's legs out from underneath him "Thanks guys, I've gotta say I thought I'd get bored today without your help, what with having free time and playing video games, risking my life is so much better!" Spider-Man used his powerful fingers to flick himself forward, trucking into a roll before springing up on his hands once he was on his shoulders to kick another man in the face.

"What the fuck is wrong with you guys?!" a man in black yelled "Just fuckin' shoot him already!"

"Hey!" Spider-Man said, using his webbing to grab hold of the man and pulling him closer to him "Watch your language, there are impressionable children here" He punched the man down to the ground and kicked his gun away before another hail of bullets was fired at him. Using a back handspring he dodged the cloud of deadly objects and landed on a wall.

"Take it easy now fellas, there's no need to get hasty" Spider-Man said "Hasty... tasty... food... God dammit now I'm hungry, thanks guys!"

"You cannot be serious?" a Hispanic man asked in utter disbelief.

"Oh no, I'm serious" Spider-Man nodded "I missed breakfast today, my own fault I know, and I was supposed to be getting something to eat with my friends before I got distracted by someone and they brought me here"

"And who the fuck would that be?" one of the men dressed in black asked "Another one of your lame jokes is gonna be the answer, right?" Black Cat, having been absent from the fight the entire time, leaped down from the roof and landed on the shoulders of a Hispanic man.

"I've been called many things in my time, a joke being one of them, but I've never felt like it was a strong insult" she sighed, using her weight to flip the man over and onto his back. He landed with a painful cracking noise, Black Cat landing on her feet before she dropped down onto her knee and punched the man in the face, knocking him out.

"What!?" another man yelled in surprise "What's she doing here?!"

"Helping" Black Cat shrugged, sprinting forward and feinting a punch to a man's face before dropping down and slamming her knee into the man's knee joint, causing his leg to snap out to the side. He screamed in pain before Black Cat roundhouse kicked him in the jaw and knocked him down and out. Spider-Man noticed one of the men taking aim at Black Cat's head and he acted, webbing the gun and pulling it out of the man's hand before using his other hand to catch his leg and drag him to him. Spider-Man stepped forward and kicked him in the face, knocking his head back onto the floor, being unconscious before hitting the ground. The two of them worked together as a team to take out the remainder of the thugs before they noticed the large amount of heavily armed thugs, wielding assault rifles, shotguns and being covered in armour flooding into the court.

"Oh great... ideas?" Spider-Man asked Black Cat.

"Yeah, run!" she answered, leaping high into the air and latching onto a wall with her claws before using her grappling cable to make a quick getaway. Spider-Man noticed that she was holding the case that had been offered during the exchange and he leaped after her. He landed on the roof and spotted Black Cat moving rapidly back up to Midtown with the case in her hand.

"God dammit, slow down Cat!" Spider-Man yelled. Try as he might to keep pace with her it was when she dropped down into an alley, still several seconds ahead of him, that he lost sight of her. He jumped down into the alley, landing softly, before standing up and looking in all directions. His Spider-Sense went off and he turned around, just in time to have Black Cat jump on him and knock him down to the floor. His head slammed off the floor with a loud crack coming from his neck as Black Cat's playful grin shone down on him, radiating beauty.

"Owww" he mumbled, looking up at the woman who wouldn't move and yet wouldn't attack him "Any need?"

"Yes" she responded happily "I just wanted to see the view from up here"

"Why?" he asked, his head throbbing in pain.

"Oh, you know-" she giggled, leaning slightly to the side with her hand placed flat on Spider-Man's abdomen "I always like to get a good view of my conquered land"

"W-What?" Spider-Man whimpered, attempting to move Black Cat off him only to have her place a hand on his outer thigh.

"What's wrong?" she asked in a pouting tone "You don't like it? Or do you want to be on top?"

"I... uhhh..." Spider-Man muttered, unable to find words. Black Cat slowly moved her hands up to his neck, hooking her thumbs underneath his mask and beginning to pull it up.

"Whoa, what are you doing?" Spider-Man asked, grabbing hold of her wrists to stop her.

"Nothing, just going to give you a little taste" she said in a seductive tone "Don't you want me to?"

"I..." Spider-Man mumbled.

"That's what I thought" she laughed, pulling the mask up to his nose "Now hold still..." She lowered her head down to his and locked lips with him, sliding her tongue into his mouth with a giggle. Spider-Man's head hit the roof as over a thousand different emotions rocketed through his mind like a shot of adrenaline, ranging from the smell to the taste and to the texture. His eyes closed under his mask as he allowed himself to kiss back, his heart thudding hard enough to break a rib. He felt Black Cat pull away from him, too soon in his opinion, and he heard her take in a breath before her weight was lifted off him.

"Wow... Cat, I had no idea that you-" he began before opening his eyes, seeing that Black Cat, as well as the case full of drugs, had disappeared in a matter of seconds "Son of a bitch!" He jumped back up to his feet and pulled his mask down over his mouth again, fitting it back into place, before sprinting out into the street.

"Where did she..." he muttered, seeing the bizarre look he was getting from people "Fuck, she's gone"

Boot Camp

Peter walked quickly down the street, heading back home with his phone pressed to his ear. The dial tone sounded loudly before Twilight's voice came through on the other end.

"Peter" she said in a cold tone.

"Whoa, what did I do wrong?" Peter asked in a surprised tone.

"You ran out on us, you left Harry when he needed you" Twilight answered sternly "You're his best friend, you're supposed to be there for him"

"Hey, you were there with him and you're is girlfriend" Peter said defensively.

"Maybe, but you've known him your entire life, I don't know him as well as you do and I don't know what I'm supposed to do when he gets like that" Twilight said "He needed you to talk to him and you ran off"

"It's not like that Twilight, I needed to take care of something" Peter said, placing his hand to his face and sighing "It was-"

"More important?" Twilight cut in.

"No, urgent, not able to be ignored" Peter snapped, his temper flaring briefly.

"Oh, and what was this urgent problem that's worth more to you than your friend's mental health?" Twilight asked in mock interest.

"Known criminal, Black Cat, I'm looking into her theft and bank jobs to try and see if she'll lead me to the Big Man" Peter said impatiently.

"And?" Twilight asked, seemingly knowing the answer before she heard it.

"And... and nothing" Peter said, lowering his head slightly "She didn't help me, she couldn't"

"So you bailed out on your best friend to chase after some random thief woman which lead you to nowhere?" Twilight asked "I thought you were supposed to be good at this whole superhero thing?"

"Look, I don't need to hear this from you" Peter hissed angrily "If you're just going to yell at me then I'll not talk to you"

"Yeah, go ahead Petey, just run out on me like you did before" Twilight said impatiently.

"Wait, when did this become about you?" Peter asked, casting a suspicious look towards his phone.

"I-It's not about me-" Twilight said, faltering at first before trying to regain her angry tone.

"Then why did you say it like that?"

"Slip of the tongue" Twilight snapped "Look, when you're ready to talk and ready to apologize you can come find Harry and I at his place where I'm being supportive, like a real friend would be" Peter exhaled angrily through his nostrils before hanging up the phone without a goodbye. He jammed his phone back into his pocket and stuffed his hands into his jacket pockets, staring hatefully at the side walk beneath him.

"Who the hell is she to tell me when I'm being a bad friend?" Peter asked angrily "I've got  job to do, I swore I'd do, and now she's yelling at me for making the right decisions?" Peter's rational mind kicked into gear for a brief moment and allowed him to think clearly for a second.

"No, I can't say it was the right decision, I should've stayed with Harry and waited to get Cat some other time" Peter sighed, snapping back to his anger-induced thought pattern again "But still, she has no right to call me out on what I did, she doesn't know what responsibility's like"

"And you think you do?" a familiar female voice said from ahead of him. He looked up to see the familiar, and angry, face of the Black Widow standing in front of his house with her arms folded. She wasn't wearing her uniform, instead wearing a pair of black jeans with a black shirt and a leather jacket. Peter could see a gun holster at her hip with a small handgun resting inside it. Peter scowled angrily at her as he came to a stop.

"I'm not in the mood Widow" Peter growled "Just get out of my way"

"I'm afraid I can't do that, Fury wants to talk to you" Natasha responded coldly "Now" Peter attempted to push past her only to have her grab hold of his arm and pull him away from his door. Peter balled his fist and prepared to throw a punch only to be stopped by the barrel of a handgun being pressed against his forehead.

"You so much as breathe in the wrong way-" she said through gritted teeth "And I'll decorate the porch with your brains" Peter stood frozen for a brief moment before sighing loudly, uncurling his hands and looking up at the taller woman.

"What do you want?" he asked weakly.

"I already said, Director Fury wants to talk to you" she replied.

"And if I don't wanna talk to him?" Peter asked.

His response was the sound of Natasha priming the gun.

"Look, I'd love to, but my Aunt's gonna kill me if I don't get home before nine" Peter stated.

"All taken care of" Natasha countered "Your Aunt May thinks you're taking up Tae Kwondo at a gym in Manhattan and that you won't be home until eleven"

"And why did she believe that?" Peter asked.

"Because I said it convincingly" Natasha said, faking a sweet smile and a fake giggle before pressing the gun harder against Peter's head "Now let's get moving kid"

"In what?" Peter asked in an irritated tone "I don't see a car anywhere, do you?"

"Yes-" Natasha said, pointing at a black SUV across the street that Peter hadn't noticed "There, now move" Peter looked at the vehicle across from him for a long second before sighing, turning to face it and walking over to it as Natasha holstered her gun again with a smug grin.


"Why am I here exactly?" Peter asked angrily, looking down the table at Nick Fury who sat with a tablet in his hand.

"Because you're a superhero who is terrible at his job-" Fury stated, handing the tablet back to one of the S.H.I.E.L.D agents with a thankful nod "And we're here to fix that for you"

"Oh joy, how?" Peter asked with mock enthusiasm "Are you going to make me a better hero through the power of friendship or some bullshit like that?"

"No" Fury said curtly "What we're going to do is put you in a ring with an assigned trainer and beat the ever-loving hell out of you until you're able to last longer than thirty minutes against each of them" Peter folded his arms and leaned back in the chair, raising an eyebrow.

"Sounds fun, who am I gonna kick the shit out of first?" Peter asked.

"Well, seeing as how you can't throw a punch to save your life, we're going to give you a trainer who's been taught by the best" Fury said, pressing a button on the table and speaking "Steve, come on in" With that the door slid open and Captain America walked in, dressed in a pair of shorts and a S.H.I.E.L.D-branded dark grey, polyester exercise shirt. Peter took one look at him before turning back to face Fury with a finger pointed at him.

"No way, not a chance" he snapped.

"I'm afraid so Mr Parker, Steve here is going to teach you as best as he can to fight hand to hand, melee combat and certain throwing weapons until you can beat him yourself" Fury responded. Natasha chuckled from across the room before speaking up.

"If you're acting this bad about soft-heart Steve over there training you I can't wait to see who Fury's assigned to teach you grappling" she laughed.

"That would be you, Miss Romanov" Fury said with a grin. Natasha's face dropped immediately only to be quickly revived with a look of pure fury.

"Director Fury I refuse to even consider teaching this little brat how to cross his fingers much less how to fight!" she yelled.

"I can already do that thank you" Peter interjected quickly but Natasha ignored him.

"Sir, I beg of you to find someone else to do it" she continued.

"Sorry Natasha, but you're the best we've got to teach him what he needs to know" Fury shrugged.

"I think it's so nice of you guys to teach me this stuff for free" Peter said with a cocky smirk, leaning further back in his chair and placing his feet on the table.

"Oh, we're not" Fury added. Peter looked at him with a curious expression, leaning forward slightly.

"What do you mean?" Peter asked.

"We're preparing you for service kid" Fury explained.

"But I'm not joining the military" Peter stated.

"I know, you're joining S.H.I.E.L.D" Fury responded.

"Hang on, I never agreed to that" Peter growled, taking his feet down and leaning forward on the desk.

"And you don't get a choice to" Fury said, folding his arms "Like it or not kid, the day you become eighteen you become property of S.H.I.E.L.D"

"You can't do that, that's against the law!" Peter yelled.

"Sorry kid, but we are the law" Fury said "And there's nothing you can do about that" Peter's fist curled up on the desk as he glared angrily at Fury, unable to say anything in his defence.

"Now-" Fury said, activating a display on the desk and entering in a few commands "Shall we get started?"

"Do I have a choice?" Peter asked through gritted teeth.

"No" Fury responded.

"Fuck it then!" Peter said, throwing his hands in the air "Let's do this!"


Peter had changed out of his civilian gear and was now wearing a similiar outfit to Steve's only in a smaller size. The two of them were standing in a boxing ring with Steve standing in the centre of the area.

"Alright, we're going to start off easy" Steve said, rolling his shoulders "Come at me with your best hit, don't worry, I'll be able to take it"

"I hope so" Peter said, cracking his knuckles loudly. He slowly walked over to Steve, eyeing him up before throwing a punch. Within a second of the punch being thrown Peter was on the floor with a stinging pain in his stomach and the back of his head.

"The fuck just happened?" Peter asked, coughing in pain.

"Get up and I'll show you what I did" Steve said, offering a hand to Peter. Peter took it and pulled himself up, dusting himself off.

"Alright, throw the punch again and I'll do it slowly this time" Steve instructed, holding up his fists. Peter nodded and threw his punch one more time. Steve caught the attack in the flat of his hand. His fist then closed around Peter's fist and he yanked him forward. Peter allowed himself to be moved, seeing the Steve had pulled him forward, forcing him to extend his torso and leave his stomach open for him to drive his knee into. Once his knee made contact Peter attempted to hunch over to protect himself only to have Steve slowly press his elbow into the back of his head and push it down.

"See?" Steve asked "The biggest problem of fighting fast is that when you're throwing punch after punch you barely have any protection against counter attacks" Steve let go of Peter and allowed him to stand up straight once more.

"Right, try another punch but this time keep your stomach covered with your other hand" Steve said, stepping back and holding his fists up again. Peter took a moment to think about his next move before throwing another punch, holding his arm over his stomach this time. But this time Steve deflected the attack with his forearm and with a large step forward he put his body weight into a powerful punch that connected with Peter's face and knocked him flat onto his back with a loud cracking sound. Peter hit the floor with a heavy thump, dust flying out from underneath him and a pained sigh escaped his lungs.

"Son of a bitch" Peter moaned, rubbing his face with a hand "I thought you were going to do the same thing?"

"Did I say I was going to?" Steve asked in return.

"No" Peter sighed, dropping his head onto the floor of the ring and sighing once more "This is going to be a long day isn't it?"

"Probably, painful too" Steve said with a chuckle, offering his hand to Peter once more.

"Should I get a pillow?" Peter asked as he grabbed hold of Steve's hand "I get the feeling I'm going to have to get comfortable down here"

"That'd probably be a great idea" Steve nodded with a grin. Peter was pulled back to his feet and he dusted himself off again.

"Right, so first things first I think we should work on your stance" Steve said "In case someone goes for your legs"

"It wouldn't make a difference" Peter shrugged "I can just stick to the floor so they won't be able to push me over" Steve then suddenly rushed at Peter, the latter expecting the move and activating his adhesive powers. Steve swung his leg out and it collided with Peter's knee joint, causing it to bend painfully. The teenager hissed in pain, bending over to try and block the second kick Steve was preparing. Unluckily for Peter the kick was a feint and his duck had only opened him up more as Steve stepped forward once more and brought his knee up into Peter's face, the impact forcing him to stand up straight once again. His adhesive abilities kept him standing but this only proved to be a mistake as Steve then stepped back before lashing forward with a series of stabbing kicks that slammed into Peter's face several times before he brought up his hands and caught Steve's foot.

"Ha!" he exclaimed, believing he had won. Steve countered this by stomping his leg downwards, using his greater strength to pull Peter down once more only to again bring up his knee into the teen's forehead and knee him back up to a standing position with a painful thudding sound. Peter stood up for several seconds before dropping onto his backside clutching at his head.

"You OK there kid?" Steve asked.

"No I'm not fucking OK" Peter spat, his temper flaring and his pride stinging fiercely "I can't land a hit on you"

"So do you understand now why we needed to teach you to fight?" Steve asked.

"No!" Peter spat "How many super-powered nutjobs do you expect me to run into?!" Steve placed his hands on his hips and shook his head, giving Peter a disappointed look.

"What?" Peter snapped "Why are you looking at me like that?"

"Because I can't believe how deluded you are about this" Steve answered "I don't think you have a clue what being a superhero involves"

"Of course I do" Peter hissed, standing up again and taking his hands away from his head.

"So tell me, if you're so sure" Steve said sternly "Because I don't think you do"

"Being a superhero is about fighting crime in order to protect the innocent" Peter said, giving a textbook answer.

"And do you expect it to be easy?" Steve continued.

"Well... I guess it would be seeing as how I'm a superhero and not just a normal guy" Peter shrugged.

"So do you just expect to be able to waltz through your fights with no difficulty?" Steve asked.

"No, I-"

"Then why are you complaining about having to learn how to fight?" Steve cut in.

"Because I didn't expect it to be so..." Peter muttered.

"So difficult is the word you're looking for, you're trying to say that you didn't expect to have to put any work into this, that you'd just put on a costume and save the day within minutes" Steve explained "That's right, isn't it Peter?"

"No" Peter growled "I just... I'm just upset at how bad I am at this, I've only barely managed to scrape my way through the fights I've had, I feel like I'm not good enough"

"And that's why we're here, doing this for you" Steve elaborated "To train you to be able to look after yourself and utilize your powers to their full extent to keep people safe, so, are you going to stop complaining and start practising already?"

"I... I guess" Peter nodded, the red mark on his face beginning to fade away.

"Good, now we can start with leg movements and why being unable to fall over isn't the best battle strategy" Steve said, clapping Peter on the shoulder and moving away from him.

Malfunction

Shining sat on the couch next to his wife, the beautiful princess resting her head against his chest as she slept peacefully. Her head rose and fell with each breath Shining took and the beat of her husband's heart was a calm rhythm for her to listen to. Shining moved slowly to pick up the remote in order to turn the TV off and take a nap himself only to hear the loud sound of pigeons cooing and a loud yell of anger.

"Leave you alone you flying rats!" the voice from outside yelled "I don't have any damn bread for you!" Cadance's head perked up, her eyes opening slowly before she exhaled quietly.

"What... what's going on?" she asked sleepily.

"I have an idea... but I'm not sure" Shining said, looking up at the roof as the sounds of a struggle continued. Cadance sat up and rubbed her eyes, her afternoon nap over thanks to the disturbance, and Shining got up off the couch himself.

"I'll be back in a sec" Shining sighed. He walked over to the balcony door and slid it open just in time to see a pigeon being thrown off the roof and Spider-Man land on the railing of the balcony.

"How'd you like that you ravenous flying bastard!?" he yelled, holding up his middle finger and waving it at the rest of them as they flew away. He took a deep breath before groaning in pain, seemingly sore from a prior event.

"I thought I asked you to take care of the Big Man and his cronies, not terrorise the local pigeon populous" Shining said, crossing his arms.

"Excuse me? Those little shits came after me first, they nearly tore me in half!" Spider-Man exclaimed "I swear..."

"Is there a reason you're here or did you just stop by to annoy my wife and I?" Shining asked impatiently. Spider-Man tapped his chin briefly before shrugging his shoulders.

"Can it be both?" he asked, getting an unimpressed look from Shining "Alright fine, I found something out about Black Cat"

"Which is?" Shining asked.

"She doesn't work directly for the Big Man, what I got from her is that she's freelance" Spider-Man answered "The two of us managed to stop a drug deal together but-"

"Whoa, whoa, wait a second... you worked together?" Shining asked.

"Yes, so?" Spider-Man asked, unsure of Shining's mood.

"She's a wanted fugitive, I'm gonna have to add that to your rap sheet now" Shining said.

"Great, thanks pal" Spider-Man nodded "Anyway, d'you got any other players that might work for the Big Man?"

"I gave you everything we got on the case, what did you figure out?" Shining asked.

"I found out that the biggest drug racket is being run through Soho, beyond that the file didn't get me much" Spider-Man answered "Different trade routes and courier paths but I didn't get a chance to check them out yet"

"Right... I can't send any uniforms down these paths to stake out drug runners, Soho used to be a decent place but its been completely owned by the Big Man, cops aren't trusted down there and every third guy is an informant for him, he'd find out within an hour where a car was placed, marked or not, and we'd have more dead officers on our hands" Shining explained "But..."

"But I figure I can go down there, take out a few of the couriers and bring the stash to a safer area, after all, an informant can't give away the identity of a guy in a mask and they're gonna have a hard time stopping me" Spider-Man continued "If I can get a few of the guys to talk maybe I can start working my way up the chain and fry some bigger fish"

"Good plan" Shining said "You go and find out what you can, raid a few stashes and bring the product to the nearest precinct and I'll radio the boys to be on the look out for you"

"Deal" Spider-Man nodded "I'll stop by later tonight and check in"

"Not tonight, Cadance and I are going to a function being held at the Stark Manor in Central Park" Shining said "Maybe some other time"

"Right, some other time then" Spider-Man nodded "I'll see you round"

"Good, get to work kid" Shining said, turning around and walking back into the apartment.

"OK, first stop, Soho" Spider-Man said, throwing himself out into the air "I've got an appointment with an off-license pharmacy"


"So... you shot him?" Norman Osborn asked his son, leaning back in his chair with his fingertips pressed together.

"Yeah" Harry said, leaning forward in his own chair with his eyes glued to the floor. Harry's mother placed a hand on his shoulder and smiled softly at him.

"It's alright Harry, you did what you had to" she said.

"It's better than alright Emily" Norman said , standing up and walking over to a small table where a bottle of brandy sat next to a selection of small glasses "This is great news for Harry"

"Norman!" Emily snapped "This is a horrible thing for Harry, he never should've had to kill that man"

"I agree, he should never have had to, he didn't have to" Norman said, pouring two bottles of brandy and walking over to his son "But he did, he made a decision, a hard one, and that decision saved lives" Harry looked up at his father who looked at him with a proud smile, a faint smile appearing on his own lips.

"You've proven that you're able to do whatever is necessary in order to ensure your safety and the safety of others, you didn't sit around and allow this man to do what he wanted, you stood up for yourself son and proved that Harry Osborn is not a man to be trifled with and for that, I'm proud of you son" Harry smiled widely and stood up, toasting to the success before the two men drank from their glasses.

"You've taken the first step to becoming stronger Harry" Norman smiled "Now we just need to work on solidifying that will of yours and pretty soon you'll be running Oscorp with the same control as your old man"

"Thanks Dad" Harry nodded with a laugh.

"Norman..." Emily said unhappily.

"Dear relax, this is great news for us" Norman said to his wife.

"I don't think we should be praising Harry for killing someone honey" Emily said, crossing her arms and looking down.

"Its not about the fact he killed someone, its about the fact he was able to make a decision that would ruin most people and have the bravery and strength to go through with it" Norman said "Its the strength of character I'm praising dear, now come on and have a drink with us" Emily remained still for a long second before nodding slowly.

"Alright, but try to make sure we don't have another celebration like this any time soon Harry dear" she said.

"Of course Mom" Harry nodded.

"So Harry, when would you like to start your internship at Oscorp?" Norman asked "I'm thinking floor manager is a good place to start, paid of course"


Luna angrily placed her empty drink onto the table, swallowing the last of the scotch she had poured before glaring furiously at her sister.

"How could you let him shove us out like that?" she demanded. Celestia remained silent for a second, still engrossed in her book before looking up at her sister. She looked at the level of alcohol left in the scotch bottle before looking back at Luna.

"You're going to be hungover tomorrow Luna" Celestia commented, avoiding the question.

"Answer the damn question Celestia!" Luna snapped "How could you?"

"Because we had no right to be in his office" Celestia answered "We arranged a meeting with him and he wanted it to end"

"But we have more authority than him!" Luna hissed, pouring another glass and sipping quickly from it.

"Authority or not, we have to abide by the law like everybody else, if he wanted us to be off his private property than we have to leave" Celestia said, setting down her book and standing up. Celestia walked over to the bottle of scotch and picked it up.

"You've had enough Luna" Celestia said.

"No I haven't" Luna growled, grabbing the top of the bottle and trying to pull it back.

"Luna its barely three in the afternoon, you've had two and a half bottles of scotch since we came back from Oscorp and you're nearly too drunk to stand" Celestia said sternly, snatching the bottle away and nearly causing her sister to tip over due to her inebriated state.

"Fine, I'll just go get another one" Luna spat.

"Really Luna, this is pitiful" Celestia said in an irritated tone "You're just going to sit here and drink because you didn't get your way?"

"Yes" Luna answered simply "I can do whatever the hell I want to, I'm a grown woman and you can't tell me what to do"

"If you're a grown woman than act like it" Celestia sighed "You're acting like an upset eighteen year old who has just found their way into their father's alcohol cabinet, stop drinking so much and get a grip of yourself"

"Don't tell me what to do" Luna said, pointing angrily at her sister. Celestia shook her head and left the room leaving her sister standing there on her own, wallowing in anger and frustration. Luna placed a hand on the table to steady herself, shaking her head softly.

"I'm not a child" she mumbled to herself "I'm an ancient princess who still has to put up with her stuck up bitch of a sister even after five thousand years... I need my own place... and I need a drink"


Spider-Man landed on the side of a building, his back pressed up against it and his feet sticking to the wall. In the past couple of days his adhesive powers had strengthened to the point where his feet were now able to support his weight while sticking to surfaces, something that had come in handy recently. His body still ached from the training he'd done with Captain America and he looked forward to the training session the next week. Returning his mind to the present he looked down at the ground in order to try and scout out the courier who was carrying the contraband to the drop-off point somewhere in Soho.

"Alright..." he mumbled "I just need to keep an eye out for any subtle but shifty movements and-" His thoughts were interrupted by the sound of a man sprinting through the street below him. He looked down to see a man dressed all in black with a mask on carrying a large backpack running at full speed.

"Well, that didn't take long" Spider-Man said in a surprised tone. He leapt down into the street and used his webbing to catch the man's foot.

"Oh boy, I think I've got a big one here!" he yelled, yanking the man over to him and catching him by the collar. He tore the backpack away from him and threw the man aside, webbing him down with a flick of his wrist.

"So, let's see what I'm getting for an early Christmas..." Spider-Man said. Spider-Man opened the bag and peered inside only to have his Spider-Sense activate as a metallic box flew out of the bag. It slammed into his face and knocked him back, the box flew over to the man on the floor who had freed himself and was standing with his hand outstretched.

"Ah, I see its one of those magic boxes... can it make a rabbit appear out of nowhere?" Spider-Man asked "Or does it just have a never-ending line of handkerchiefs?" The box flew over to the man and instead of catching it the box opened up and attached itself to his arm, beginning to rapidly break down and spread all over his body.

"Oh... this can't be good" Spider-Man sighed. He rushed forward in an attempt to tackle the man to the floor and tear the technological item off him only to have the man swing for him and punch him in the jaw. The impact created a loud, metallic thunk as it launched Spider-Man back into the wall. He dropped to the floor just as the newly-formed armour completely covered the man, the eyes lighting up into a bright white colour.

"Is... is that an Iron Man suit?" Spider-Man asked "Where the hell did you get that?"

"Fuck you, freak!" the man yelled, holding out both of his hands and firing repulsor shots at Spider-Man.

"Oh Jesus" Spider-Man squeaked, throwing himself under the blasts and over to the man, dropping low and skidding towards him. He tried to swipe his legs out from underneath him only to have his foot collide with the armour and a large sensation of pain erupt into his foot.

"Owww" Spider-Man groaned.

"Fuck off!" the man yelled. He cocked back his foot and attempted to kick Spider-Man but the faster hero rolled away and used his webbing to catch the man's foot. He yanked the webbing as hard as he could and the upset of balance tipped the armoured man over.

"High level threat detected" the voice of the armour said loudly.

"What?" the man in the armour asked.

"Initiating Override"

"Oh fuck" Spider-Man mumbled. The armour opened up and ejected the man onto the ground before closing again, clenching its fists and rolling its head.

"Autopilot engaged" it said "Commencing battle strategy four-zero-nine"

"And that would be?" Spider-Man asked.

"Beatdown mode" the armour answered, slamming a fist into its palm with a loud clang.

"Oh no" Spider-Man sighed. The armour rocketed forwards and slammed into Spider-Man, changing its angle and taking off into the sky.

"Sorry ED-209 but I'm not in the mood for robotic cuddles" Spider-Man grunted, slamming his fist repeatedly into the armour's back "I'm more of a handshake guy" With a powerful punch Spider-Man broke through the armour's plating and tore out a selection of wires, causing the armour's eyes to turn red.

"Suit malfunction in progress" the armour said, a small alarm sounding inside it "Returning to base"

"Sounds fun, but I'm gonna have to pass" Spider-Man said. He attempted to pull free from the armour only to have it flip him around and bear hug him, its strength greatly overpowering him and making him unable to move.

"Oh dammit" he growled "This is all I need"


The sound of classical music filled the atmosphere of the party as the chatter of wealthy individuals accompanied the music. Shining stood with his arm linked with Cadance's as the two of them talked to another couple who they knew from high school. They smiled and parted ways, Cadance turning to her husband.

"Wow, Cheryl's changed so much since we last saw her" she smiled.

"I know, I'm surprised she isn't in the back room with four different guys" Shining said, looking back over his shoulder at the red-headed woman.

"Shining!" Cadance hissed.

"What?" Shining asked "How do you think she managed to become the cheer captain before you did?"

"She was only captain for three months" Cadance said "And then I managed to win the vote from everyone else, without whoring myself out in the bathroom"

"But she still beat you to it" Shining shrugged. Cadance glared angrily at her husband before a friendly voice called over to them.

"Shining, Cadance!" the deep voice smiled.

"Marcus?" Cadance asked as Shining's superior officer walked over to them "I didn't expect to see you here"

"Well, the wife dragged me along, she's always enjoyed this kind of crap more than I did" Glover answered.

"Tell me about it" Shining nodded "The only reason I come to these parties is because I get to when I get home"

"Shining!" Cadance snapped, her cheeks flushing pink with embarrassment. Glover laughed at the joke before his wife walked over, an woman the same age as Glover with her thick hair combed and tied behind her head in a ponytail.

"Ah, its good to see you again Shining, you too Cadance" she smiled.

"You too Margaret, how're the kids?" Cadance asked.

"They miss having you around, especially Richard, he always had a crush on you" Margaret chuckled.

"The kid's got good taste" Shining nodded "He'll go far in life"

"We hope so, all we need to do is get him interested in football and alcohol and we can all have a good time" Glover chuckled. The two men laughed as their wives rolled their eyes at the comment. There was a sudden silence from the music followed by a robotic British voice speaking.

"Sir, I regret to inform you that one of the missing armour models is on its way to the mansion"

"Why is that a bad thing?" the voice of Tony Stark said from the stage.

"Because its targeting system has failed... and I don't think it will be able to stop before it impacts the mansion"

"Oh, that is regrettable" Stark said "Can you shoot it down?"

"I thought of that sir but it seems to have taken a hostage" the robot said.

"Why would it do that?" Tony asked.

"I am not sure, it doesn't seem to be functioning properly, though its combat protocols were activated a few minutes ago"

"Alright JARVIS, keep the party going while I suit up, how long have we got before impact?"

"Four seconds"

"Oh... that's not good" Tony said in a surprised tone. The ceiling exploded violently as the broken armour unit smashed through it, slamming hard into the stage and crashing through several walls with an agonizing screeching noise.

"Welp, that looks expensive" one of the party guests said.

"I can afford it" Tony shrugged "But where was the hostage it took?" There was a loud clanging noise before a flash or red and blue was seen being thrown out of the way the armour exited and slamming through several tables. The party goers turned their heads to see Spider-Man lying on his front in a pile of wrecked tables.

"Ohhh... anyone get the number of that truck?" he asked painfully "If not... I think the plate gave me an imprint on the face" He pushed himself up and onto his feet, flicking a cake off his head.

"Target identified" the armour said as it climbed back through the walls "Executing execution"

"Whoa, bit of a syntax error there Tony?" Spider-Man yelled over to the billionaire.

"Hey, its not finished yet" Tony shrugged "So I'm guessing you broke the armour then?"

"It tried to break me first" Spider-Man said in his defence "Any advice on how to beat this thing?"

"Try hitting it"

"Thanks Tony" Spider-Man sighed, squaring his stance and preparing to fight off the robot "Why can't I go to parties without getting into fights? Is it me? I think its me"

Delicate Adjustments of Slightly-Faulty Technology

"Alright... so if I can realign the head of the armour I might be able to reconnect some loose wires back to their connection points" Spider-Man said, side flipping over the damaged armour that had swung for him with stilted yet awkward movement. The armour, showing more speed than before, whirled around and slammed its elbow into Spider-Man's face, sending him flying into a wall with a loud crunch.

"Or maybe I might have to realign some of my wires first" he groaned "Tony?!"

"I'm on it kid!" Stark yelled, scanning his hand on a pad on the wall and with a loud beep the wall slid down to reveal one of the iconic suits of Iron Man armour.

"So, which one have we got here?" Spider-Man asked "Deep sea? Volcanic exploration? Or maybe a smaller version of the Hulk Buster armour?"

"Sorry kid, we're gonna have to make do with the champagne suit" Tony chuckled, allowing the armour to attach itself to his body. Spider-Man rolled out of the way of a jet-powered kick with a panicked yelp before using his webbing to stick the rampaging armour's foot to the wall.

"Why would you build a weaponized suit with its only weapon being alcohol!?" Spider-Man demanded as the armour easily tore the webbing away from its foot.

"I have billions of dollars and a lot of free time, what suit would you make instead?" Tony asked as the helmet closed over his head and the eyes lit up.

"I don't know... maybe a suit of armour that also doubles as a surf board that can transform into a motorcycle" he shrugged, dodging another clunky punch from the armour.

"Nice concept, but what's the inspiration?" Tony asked, jetting over to the rogue armour and punching it, a loud metal clunk sounding as the impact sent the armour flying into a wall.

"I'm thinking a little bit of Michael Bay's Transformers and a lot of concussed babbling" Spider-Man grunted, attempting to web the armour down again. With next to no effort the armour tore through the webbing, much to the annoyance of the suited superhero.

"I need to make this crap stronger" he sighed, looking at his web-shooters "So to avoid damaging this thing any more than we already have do you have some sort of magnetic pulse that can hold it in place?"

"Yeah, let me try this" Tony said, holding out his wrist and firing a small rocket that hit the rogue armour and caused it to explode loudly. Spider-Man shielded his eyes from the blast before looking back at the smouldering wreck of a suit.

"I thought you said it only fired champagne?" Spider-Man asked Stark as he walked over to him.

"Nope, booze and big guns" Stark shrugged "Tis the American way"

"True, true" Spider-Man nodded, placing his hands on his hips "So... should I exit stage right or am I allowed to stay for a goodie bag?"

"Actually" Marcus said, walking over to the costumed superheroes "I'd prefer you to stay right where you are"

"Sorry pal, I don't do autographs" Spider-Man said, giving a small nod before turning around and strolling away. Glover quickly reached behind his back, taking a handgun from a hidden holster on his belt, and aimed it at Spider-Man.

"Freeze Spider-Man!" Glover snapped "Get on the ground and I won't hurt you" Spider-Man stopped and looked behind him, seeing everyone staring at him. With a loud sigh he turned around and got onto his knees.

"Alright, I surrender" he said, holding his arms out in front of him.

"Honey, why did you bring your police gear with you?" Margaret asked in an embarrassed tone.

"I'll be with you in a second honey" Marcus said sternly. He took out a pair of handcuffs from his belt and walked slowly over to Spider-Man. He placed the cuffs gingerly under the masked man's wrists and attempted to close them. But, moving faster than Marcus could react, Spider-Man sprung up slightly, revolving his wrists around Marcus's hands and whipping his legs out in front of him. With a light squeeze he closed the handcuffs around the police commissioner's wrist and the quick kick knocked his legs out from underneath him. He landed hard on his stomach, grunting on impact, and Spider-Man fired two webs onto his hands to stick them to the floor.

"Wow!" he exclaimed, leaping into a backward roll "I can't believe you fell for that one, see you Mr Glover!" Landing on his feet again Spider-Man leaped up high and smashed through a closed window, disappearing into the night once more.

"Son of a bitch!" Marcus spat.

"Marcus, hang on a sec" Shining said, moving quickly over to him and, using a discarded knife that had fallen off the table during the fight, cut the webbing from Marcus's hands and unlocked the cuffs using the keys Marcus had.

"That little shit moves faster than I thought" Glover growled, rubbing his wrists.

"Gotta admit though" Stark chuckled, folding his arms "That was a pretty snazzy trick"

"Stark, two things: One, shut up" Glover growled "And two, who even uses the word snazzy any more?"

"Its a billionaire word, you don't have the net worth to make it work" Tony shrugged "So... anyone up for a game of beer pong with crystal wine glasses?"

"Me!" Cadance called from behind the scene.

"Alright, you versus me Princess, winner stays on" Tony laughed.


Spider-Man pulled the sleeves of his suit down slightly, exposing the web-shooters enough to allow him to eject the cartridges and replace them with new ones.

"I can't believe how useless these things are when I'm fighting, Black Cat's claws can cut them and now I know the Iron Man armour's too strong to hold down" he sighed. He rested his back against the wall he stuck to, feeling his sore muscles beginning to ache after the tiresome day he'd had coupled with the rough training from the previous day.

"On the bright side I managed to figure out what else the Big Man is smuggling... but how the hell did he get hold of an almost fully functioning Iron Man suit?" Spider-Man asked, pulling his sleeves back down "And what's gonna show up next on the trade routes? Pym Particles? Some kind of Arc Reactor... if this guy can get access to some of the highest level of tech in the world then I can't even guess what else he'd be dealing" He placed his arms on his knees and looked out over the city, seeing the slow lines of late night traffic creep through the city, the distant sound of horns blaring and engines rumbling mixed in with the bright lights of the night.

"Wait... oh shit, what time is it?" Spider-Man exclaimed, taking his phone out of his bag he'd collected and checking it, seeing that it had just gone eight thirty "Oh fuck, I've gotta get from upper Manhattan to Queens in less than half an hour?! Wondrous web-shooters do not fail me now!"

Becoming a Problem

"Alright, Jason you crack the safe, Alex, you hit the cases and Marco, you stand watch outside" the crook in the balaclava said "If anybody even so much as sneezes near here we're out, right?"

"Right" the other three said in unison. They each set about their work in good time, their trained hands making quick work of the numerous locks and dials in the jewellery store. The minutes slowly ticked by before the sound of a rolling can got the attention of the aforementioned Marco. He stepped outside of the entry way and looked around only to be suddenly snatched from above and knocked out with a swift punch.

"Marco?" one of them asked, looking at the door for their friend "Marco?!"

"Polo!" a cocky voice laughed, the red and blue clad Spider-Man lowering himself into vision via web-line.

"Spider-Man!?" another yelled.

"No, no, you're supposed to shout 'Marco' again and then I shout 'Polo' so you can try and find me" he chuckled arrogantly, looking at each of them slowly "But... hey! You guys aren't wearing blindfolds! That's cheating!"

"Get him!" the boss yelled, throwing his lock pick down and charging at Spider-Man. Spider-Man sighed in disappointment, lurching forward, over the crook's head, and landing behind him.

"Really?" he asked bemusedly "Get him? That's the best you could come up with?" Spider-Man dropped low and swept the crook's legs out from underneath him before pivoting on his hand and kicking him in the stomach before he hit the ground, sending him flying into the wall and knocking him out.

"After all the trouble I go through to turn you into famous Spider-Perps-" he said, using his webbing to catch another of the criminals and pull him towards himself, catching his leg and using him as a weapon against his friend, taking two of them down and webbing both of them against the wall "You could at least try to be a little more creative than just get him, after all, I always am" Spider-Man looked around and once he confirmed that the room was indeed empty he went about his usual routine of signing a piece of paper, in capitals as Twilight had told him, sticking it to the forehead of the lead crook and making sure to trip an alarm on the way out.

"Say hi to Commissioner Glover for me will you?" Spider-Man asked as he left the store, seeing people beginning to notice him too "We kinda got off on the wrong foot last time"


"Wrong foot?!" Glover snapped "I'll put my wrong foot up his ass!" Shining lowered his coffee from his lips with a grin secured on them. He ran a hand through his freshly cut and styled hair before taking off his blue aviators.

"Alright boss, I think you're taking this a little too personally" Shining grinned, walking over to his superior "I think we just need to get some of the uniforms down here and have them take care of it before you burst a blood vessel" Glover whirled around to the smiling captain with a furious expression before looking at the coffee he was holding.

"When did you get that?" he asked, eyeing the cup with a suspicious expression.

"I came here with it, I've got another one in the car if you want it?" Shining offered.

"Decaf, right?" Glover asked.

"Yup, don't want to get you any more energized than you already are" Shining nodded.

"Right, any word back from the boys on the desks?" Glover queried as the two of them walked over to Shining's car.

"Yeah, we got a positive ID on one of them, Jason Guiles, thirty five year old with known connections to higher ups in the Big Man's crime chain" Shining recited from memory "He's mostly known for petty theft and small time drug pushing but seems to make enough money from somewhere to get a good enough lawyer to get him out every time"

"But this time we've got him red-handed" Glover smirked.

"Yeah, it'll be hard for his lawyer to get him out of this one" Shining said with a nod, reaching into his car and taking out the extra coffee "Hold up a second, I need to make a quick call" Shining took his phone out of his pocket and dialled Cadance's number, the call ringing four times before she picked up.

"Mmph... what d'you need honey?" she asked sleepily, her voice rough and quiet.

"You feel any better?" he asked with a smile.

"No... I feel like I've been run over by a fire truck" Cadance moaned, the sound of the phone scraping against the pillow sheets audible as she presumably turned over in bed.

"Well that's what you get when you play four rounds of beer pong with Smirnoff in the glasses" Shining said critically.

"I won didn't I?" she asked with a weak laugh.

"And how happy do you feel about that?" Shining responded.

"Fuck my life..." Cadance groaned "Just... fuck everything"

"Alright babe, d'you want me to pick something up for you when I'm on my home?"

"That'd be great, how long will that be?" Cadance asked.

"A few hours at least, I've got a new case to work on and I've gotta tackle a new pile of paperwork" Shining said apologetically "Do you wanna try and sleep a while longer before I get back?"

"Why do you have to work?" Cadance said in a moping voice "I can look after both of us"

"Because my masculinity feels threatened" Shining said bluntly "I feel like as a man I need to do my part to put food on the table"

"Shining..." Cadance said slowly "I don't think we need to worry about food on the table when I control one fourth of the country's fucking money"

"I've noticed that you swear a lot when you're hungover dear" Shining said "Its quite unladylike"

"Fuckity shit fuck cunt!" Cadance said loud and fast "Love you, hurry home!" Cadance ended the call and Shining stared into space for a brief second with a wide grin on his face.

"What's up Shining?" Glover asked from a few steps away.

"Nothing, just Cadance reminding me why I love her so much" Shining grinned.

"Is she using her feminine charm to try and get you home quicker?" Glover asked with a small smile.

"In a way... I guess you could say that" Shining nodded "Now, you need your coffee and we need to get back to work"


"And that's another one of our heists ruined by this damn Spider-Freak" the deep Manhattan accent growled, slamming the newspaper down on the table in front of the Big Man "I don't know about you Boss but I'm getting sick and tired of our boys endin' up webbed to a fucking wall every time I open the paper"

"Hammerhead my dear friend, relax" the Big Man said, linking his fingers together and resting his broad jaw on them "This Spider-Man is nothing more than an annoying pest, another bug to be squished under our boot"

"You sure Boss?" Hammerhead asked "I think he's becomin' a problem" The Big Man was silent for a brief second before turning his large swivel chair around to look out the window of his penthouse suite.

"If the Spider-Man truly scares you Hammerhead then maybe I shall look into the matters involved in removing him" the Big Man said in a dry tone.

"I ain't scared of him Boss, I just don't think we should risk letting him get any closer to us, he's already got one of our goons to talk and now half the fuckin' city is looking for anyone who operates under the name Big Man" Hammerhead explained "Look, Boss, if you think he ain't worth a damn then I respect that and I'll trust you, but what I'm sayin' is that this fucker doesn't operate like the police and can get information out of our goons that the police can't" The Big Man was silent for yet another moment before he nodded curtly.

"OK then my friend, I've heard your argument and I agree with you, we'll look into taking care of this pest" he said slowly.

"And how are we gonna go about this Boss?" Hammerhead asked.

"We'll start with a phone call to our dear Mr Osborn about that little deal we agreed on" the Big Man said with a wry grin "I believe that his genetic reconfiguration machine is just about complete"

"I like the way you think Boss" Hammerhead grinned, taking out his cell phone and making a call as he walked out of the room. As the doors closed behind Hammerhead the Big Man leaned back in his chair and sighed.

"So Spider-Man, you've got my attention, just as you wanted" he growled "Now I believe its time to show you how big of a mistake you've just made"

"Going shopping"? Huh... never heard of that side quest before.

Twilight sat with her knees up to her chest as she read through her text messages, her anger slowly building as her boyfriend kept repeatedly smacking her in the back of a head with a pillow. The impact caused no pain, more annoyance than anything, but the most agonizing part of the process was the whiny grunt that accompanied every swing.

"Harry..." Twilight said quietly.

"I don't wanna" Harry whimpered.

"Harry" Twilight said, looking up from her phone and gritting her teeth in anger.

"I don't wanna!" Harry repeated, louder this time.

"Harry, I swear that if you hit me one more time with that fucking pillow I'm going to beat the hell out of you until you piss blood" Twilight growled furiously. There was a second of silence as both Harry and Twilight remained still before Harry cocked back his arm again and swung the pillow, hitting Twilight in the back of the head.

"I don't w-" Harry began.

"Alright, that fucking does it!" Twilight roared, throwing her phone down onto the couch and leaping at her boyfriend, tackling him to the ground and attempting to grab the pillow from him. The two began to roll around and scuffle, being unaware that the door opened and Cadance stood there with three glasses resting in her arms. Her eyes were locked onto the glasses as she carried them and had to open the door with her foot, so her attention was not attracted by the fight going on.

"Christ, do you have any idea how difficult it was to carry all three of these?" she asked in an irritated tone "I nearly dropped the third one twice until I figured out I could carry it in my cleavage, seriously, having a massive rack has more cons than just back pain..." Cadance finally noticed the fight going on and glared at both of them angrily.

"Hey!" she shouted at the two of them "What the hell are you doing!?" The two teens froze, still grabbing onto each other. Twilight's black skirt had been ruffled and now rested on her lower back, exposing her underwear, and her black jacket had been pushed down her shoulders in a very suggestive manner. Meanwhile the buckle of Harry's belt had broken, the two parts separated and his pants having been pulled down during the scuffle and a random pull from Twilight had torn the buttons off his shirt and exposed his chest.

"Uhhh..." Twilight said, looking at her sister in law with a blank expression.

"You wanna join in?" Harry asked with a cheesy grin. Twilight cocked back her fist and punched her boyfriend in the eye, knocking him off his elbows and down onto the floor with a groan of pain.

"Ignore him" Twilight said, standing up off Harry's body and pulling her skirt down and her jacket up again "I swear that was not what it looked like"

"Really?" Cadance asked in a disbelieving tone "I honestly thought you were classier than this"

"Are you saying I'm not a classy guy?" Harry asked weakly.

Twilight responded with a quick kick in the ribs.

"Point taken" Harry groaned, turning over and assuming the foetal position "Shutting up now"

"I wasn't about to fuck him Cadance!" Twilight snapped.

"Bullshit Twilight!" Cadance growled "I just caught the two of you stripping each other down!"

"It was an accident, we were fighting" Twilight growled, crossing her arms and turning her red cheeks away from Cadance's furious expression.

"Twilight you are fifteen years old, I don't even agree with you having a boyfriend much less having sex with him!" Cadance yelled "What would Shining think if I told him his little sister was having sex with some guy we barely know!?" At this point Shining walked into the room and examined the scenario before speaking.

"I heard my name and then the word 'sex'" he said quickly "What exactly is going on here?"

"I just caught Twilight about to get down and dirty with Harry" Cadance said, looking at her husband with a disgusted expression.

"Can I just say that that is an amazing euphemism for sex?" Harry asked from the floor.

"I know right?" Shining asked with a grin.

"Shining!" Cadance yelled furiously "Aren't you going to say anything about your fifteen year old sister having sex!?"

"Yes, first thing I'll say is that its a disgusting thought that I never want to have a mental image of and two is that if I ever find out that you two have had sex I will personally break everyone of your bones and crucify you above the entrance to make sure nobody else even looks at Twilight in the same way, understand?" Shining said, looking down at Harry with a straight face.

"Understood sir" Harry said "And can I just say that you're really good at the terrifying older brother thing?"

"Thank you" Shining said, losing his serious attitude again "I worked very hard on it"

"Holy shit guys, Harry and I weren't about to have sex!" Twilight said, grabbing the side of her head in frustration "He kept hitting me with a pillow and yelling that he didn't want to go with me so I tackled him and tried to beat him up"

"And in what fucking reality does he think he can get away with fighting with my sister?" Shining demanded "And what's your excuse Osborn?" Harry climbed back up to his feet, still holding his sore ribcage, before explaining himself.

"She said that I had to go shopping with her" he groaned. Shining suddenly moved over to Harry and placed a hand on his shoulder, Harry's expression becoming terrified.

"Christ on a bike man, I completely understand" Shining said "You've taken a stand against the tyranny but your true words have been drowned out by the vicious queen, I salute you brave rebel" Shining took his hand off Harry's shoulder and saluted him, the teen responded with a wide grin and a salute of his own.

"Oh come on, going shopping with me isn't that bad" Twilight said, rolling her eyes.

"Are you on drugs Twilight?" Shining asked, grabbing hold of his sister's arms and lightly shaking her "I'd rather go through my pepper spray resistance training than spend an afternoon shopping with you!"

"Is it really that bad?" Harry asked.

"Its agonizing, she spends forty minutes in a store looking at underwear or clothes, picks out a pair and walks halfway to the checkout before deciding she doesn't want them" Shining explained, an over the top performance if there every was one.

"Dear God" Harry said, his face dropping a mile.

"I know" Shining nodded.

"Oh, that reminds me honey, I have to take back that lingerie to the store" Cadance said, tapping a finger on her elbow as she stood with her arms crossed.

"Please no..." Shining whimpered.

"And I've gotta get a new turtle neck, my old one got burnt over the oven a few days ago" Twilight added.

"No..." Harry said, almost weeping.

"I have an idea, why don't we all go together and save the extra car journey?" Cadance suggested with a bright smile. The two men looked at each other with terrified expressions before they practically fell over one another in a mad dash for the door.

"Oh no you don't!" Cadance said, grabbing both of them by the collar and dragging them back over "Harry, you need to make up for violating my little sister and Shining you still need to make up for your disappointing performance last night"

"W-Wait... what?" Harry asked, looking at Shining.

"She means that she'snot happy about how I quit the Monopoly game so early on" Shining said quickly.

"Oh... that's a relief" Harry sighed.

"And I couldn't get her off either" the older man smirked. Harry looked down at the floor for a second before a single, powerful shiver ran down his spine.

"Did you really need to tell him that?" Cadance asked with a happy/furious expression.

"No, I just felt like I needed to share my torment with someone else" Shining said.

"I... I wouldn't exactly call it torment Shining" Cadance said in an embarrassed tone.

"Five times last night, with a libido like hers I'm surprised she went into the fashion industry instead of the porn one" Shining added.

"Ok!" Cadance snapped, her cheeks a burning red "We're going shopping now and you two aren't allowed to talk to each other any more"


"And why the hell did you guys want me to come with you?" Peter asked with his hands in his pockets, the three of them having been outside the women's underwear store for nearly twenty five minutes.

"Because we weren't willing to accept a slow death on our own, we needed one more brother in our platoon to share the suffering" Harry said with a mock laugh.

"Its good to know I'm friends with the kind of guys who would push a family out of a lifeboat to save their own lives" Peter nodded "Makes me feel like I made the right choices"

"Push them out?" Shining asked "I'd probably Batista Bomb the youngest kid off the side of the fucker and use the parents as oars to get to safety faster" Harry and Peter stared at Shining with a look of pure amazement, seconds dragging by before Shining spoke again.

"What? Is the Batista Bomb too much?" he asked.

"I would've gone with an RKO if it were me" Harry shrugged, stuffing his hands into his pockets.

"I would've gone with a tombstone in my honest opinion" Peter added, taking his hands out of his pockets and folding his arms.

"Good suggestions" Shining nodded. There was silence for a few more seconds before the women came out of the store chatting happily together.

"Finally, scrape the moss off and shave the beards guys" Shining said to the other two "They're back"

"Sorry we took so long" Cadance said with a sweet smile "I wanted to get something extra special" She was going to continue and explain what she'd gotten before Shining held up a hand.

"Before you tell me what it is, tell me how much it cost first" he said.

"I paid for it" Cadance said sourly.

"That doesn't matter, we have a joint account" Shining responded.

"Of over six hundred million dollars!" Cadance snapped.

"Answer the question" Shining said, still pushing for an answer.

"Fine, two hundred and fifty dollars" she growled "Happy now?"

"Two hundred and fifty bucks?" Shining asked in disgust "Does it come with the model that wore it?"

"Shining!" Cadance said in an irritated tone.

"I could by a prostitute to wear the underwear for less than it cost to buy it" Shining continued.

"Will you stop showing off in front of your friends?" Cadance asked "You're acting like a child" Peter and Harry meanwhile were stood a few feet away trying to hold back their laughter, gaining themselves angry stares from Twilight who walked over to them and began to talk.

"Don't tell me you're laughing at that?" she asked.

"Why shouldn't we?" Peter asked "The joke had good acting, it mentioned money and explained the spending of said money on the acquisition of prostitutes for less than Cadance acquired her lingerie for, its both witty and upper class, what's not to like?" Twilight slapped her palm to her face as the two teenagers pretended to twirl moustaches whilst laughing in a generic French accent.

"I often wonder why I'm friends with you two" Twilight sighed.

"Me too, you're way too good for us" Peter nodded.

"Well, too good for Petey here, but I'm rich and handsome so I qualify for friendship status" Harry said, grinning cockily at Peter who responded by pointing his middle finger directly at Harry's face.

"Can you two behave for fifteen minutes please?" Cadance asked the teens "I don't want to have to babysit three misbehaving children today"

"Fifteen minutes?" Peter asked, checking his watch whilst inhaling a sharp breath "I dunno, that's quite a long time to behave"

"Please?" Cadance asked, making puppy dog eyes at the both of them "For me?" The two teens looked at each other with surprised expressions before looking back at Cadance and nodding once.

"Yes Ma'am" they said simultaneously.

"Good" Cadance said happily "Now, shall we continue?"

"Yeah, I guess" Harry nodded.

"Where to next, Twilight, where do you think we should-" Cadance began.

"Video games" the three men announced, Shining grabbing Cadance's hand and Harry Twilight's before leading them in the direction of the nearest Gamestop. Peter chuckled and began to walk behind them before his Spider-Sense went off, signalling danger close by.

"Peter?" Harry called back to him "You coming?"

"Y-Yeah, I'm gonna grab something from the food court, you go on ahead and I'll meet you there" Peter explained, waving briefly before turning and heading back through the mall. As soon as his was out of sight of his friends he ducked away to a bathroom stall and changed into his Spider-Man outfit, hiding his clothing inside the air vents before heading out, just in time to hear the sound of a gunshot, then another, and another. There were scream coming from all over the mall as Spider-Man tried his best to locate where the gunshots came from in the crowded area.

"Alright, high ground Spidey" Spider-Man said, leaping up to a higher floor and looking all around. His eyes landed on a shattered pane of glass with a dead body lying in the shards.

"Bingo!" Spider-Man yelled, using his webbing to pull himself over to the store at a faster speed than normal, landing on the laminate wooden floor and skidding for several inches, sinking low into a crouch and looking around. His eyes locked onto a familiar black-clad, physically blessed figure who was currently engaged in a quick scuffle with another man brandishing a gun. She moved his arm over her shoulder before grabbing hold of it, twisting it sideways as she spun around to have her back to him and finally wrenching it downwards. The man screamed as the sickening crack of breaking bone filled the store. She grabbed the gun before it dropped and whirled around to face him, shoving the gun in his mouth before making a kissing gesture and pulling the trigger.

"Next time, do as I tell you and you won't get hurt" Black Cat growled, the man's blood and brains splattered all over the floor as his body dropped heavily, the costumed thief throwing the gun aside. Deciding not to announce his presence as he'd done before he threw himself forward, slamming his knee into Cat's ribcage and knocking her to the ground.

"Hey!" she yelled, rolling off her back and up to her feet, her black claws extending from the gloves as she settled into a fighting stance "Oh... I was hoping to see you again honey, did you like the gift I gave you in exchange for the case? I know I did"

"I'm not playing around any more Cat, I can forgive a little theft but murder? That's too far" Spider-Man growled. Cat appeared to be ready to launch another round of banter but Spider-Man threw himself forward again, slamming his fist into Black Cat's stomach and bringing his knee up into her face. She was knocked off her feet but quickly managed to flip backwards onto her feet, an angry expression on her face.

"Alright, I didn't want to have to hurt you Spider, but if you're gonna try and hurt the Cat then the Cat's gonna hurt back" she growled, moving forward and swinging a punch. It was at this point that Spider-Man realized, anger or not, that she was still a much better fighter than him and that his brief sparring session with Captain America was not nearly enough to go toe to toe with Black Cat just yet. Still, he had learned to slow down his own punches and watch out for give-aways for certain attacks but that only helped him out slightly. He managed to block a kick with his own knee and retaliated by booting Black Cat out of the store.

"Sorry Madam but I'm afraid I'm going to have to ban you for life and hand out a mandatory ass kicking for the trouble you've caused" Spider-Man growled, feeling obligated to crack at least a few jokes.

"Ohhh, can I still use my membership card for a free drink at Starbucks with every purchase?" Cat pouted, her own playful attitude returning as his own did. Spider-Man moved forward, readying himself for an attack, but instead Black Cat gave him a two finger salute before turning around and leaping up to the top floor of the mall, hopping over the railing and disappearing from sight.

"You're not getting away this time!" Spider-Man yelled, sprinting outside the store and throwing himself after the Black Cat "Gotta get her before she causes any more trouble"

"Stop right there Cat!" Shining's voice yelled.

"Hey there handsome, feel like letting me go if I show a little skin?" Cat's voice responded.

"And she's causing more trouble" Spider-Man sighed, getting to the spot where he could see Shining aiming a gun at Black Cat.

"You're under arrest!" Shining growled.

"Ooh, is it gonna be a rough arrest?" she asked "I love it when the officer gets naughty"

"Shut the hell up!" Cadance yelled furiously, the anger with Black Cat attempting to seduce her husband being clear on her face.

"Oh, so this must be your wife?" Black Cat asked "I've gotta say Princess I'm a big fan of your work, in fact I'm wearing a set of your underwear right now... wanna see?" Cadance visibly recoiled at the remark and it was at this time Spider-Man decided to intervene. He threw himself over the edge and aimed for Black Cat who seemed to notice him out of the corner of her eye. She whirled around and grabbed hold of Spider-Man's outstretched arms, throwing herself down into a backwards roll and wrapping her legs around his waist. Once they were upright again she pinned Spider-Man down and placed a hand to his throat.

"Here we are again" Black Cat smirked "You must really like me being on top of you... tell you what, how about we blow this joint and I'll blow something else for you?" The looks of disgust were evident on everyone's faces, especially that of Twilight and Cadance, and Spider-Man acted accordingly. Using his adhesive powers he stuck his fingertips down and pushed up his body, using his core strength to throw Cat off of him and climb back up to his feet.

"Sorry pussy cat, but I've got a reputation to keep up" Spider-Man said quickly.

"A reputation of a one-time hero who then robbed a jewellery store and attacked the police commissioner?" she asked, wiping her claws on her white fur collar "I think I'd want to keep that reputation intact too"

"I-uh... shut up" he grunted.

"I thought so" she smirked "I'd love to stay and chat, but I've got somewhere to be" She blew a kiss and gave Spider-Man a quick wink before turning around and leaping up once more. Spider-Man threw his arms forward and activated his web-shooters, firing two lines of webbing that stuck to her foot and pulled her down. She landed hard on the mall floor and groaned in pain, Spider-Man quickly rushing over to her and webbing her down, making her unable to move.

"Finally" Spider-Man said, petting Black Cat on the head "I've got you right where I want you"

"Funny, I'd always thought where you wanted me was lying naked on your bed" she said in a moping tone "Am I just not your dream girl?"

"Dreams, no" Spider-Man shrugged "Nightmares, yes"

"Then prepare to meet your worst nightmare" a Hispanic accent growled. Spider-Man was caught off guard as a red boot slammed straight into his face, knocking him away from Black Cat and allowing this new enemy to cut her free.

"What the fuck?!" Spider-Man demanded. He looked up to see a woman wearing a blood red combat shirt with black sleeves, styled with a large red arrow running down to the end of the longer top of the sleeve with a small ring of cloth that hooked over her middle finger. She wore a pair of black, skin tight pants with two loose scabbards for the two sai that rested inside them. Around her neck she wore a simple scarf and topped off with a red bandanna tied around her raven-coloured hair. Her eyes were a bright green and glared furiously at Spider-Man as she cut Black Cat free, the second woman standing up and smiling at the red-clad woman.

"Alright... does somebody wanna explain to me what the hell is going on?" Spider-Man asked.

"Are you having trouble with this pest or are you just testing my pateince Cat?" the other woman asked irritably.

"I'm just having fun, I like playing with my pet Spider" Cat giggled, winking at Spider-Man "And who said that you could ruin my fun?"

"Thirty five thousand dollars" the woman growled "The Spider dies and we all go home happy"

"Now hold on a second Elektra, no one ever said anything about-" Cat began before Elektra rushed forward, drawing the two sai at her waist and twirling them skilfully.

"Oh shit" Spider-Man sighed, back flipping away from the first few stabs of the woman he now knew as Elektra before she anticipated a move of his and managed to swipe his feet out from underneath him. Spider-Man hit the ground hard but rolled away from a quick stab from Elektra, lashing his arm out again and trying to web the sai away from her. She held onto the weapon and with a twist of her wrist she was able to place the blade against the webbing and cut through it.

"This isn't good" Spider-Man said "Hey, whatever they're paying you I'm sure I can at least give you a thirty-sixth of it if you don't!"

"You talk too much" Elektra growled, dashing forward an attempting to jab at Spider-Man's right shoulder joint with two fingers.

"Talk too much?" Spider-Man asked, leaping up high and sticking to a wall to catch his breath "Lady you don't know enough about me to make a judgement like that, gimme a chance and I'll sure you come to love my never-ending chatter"

"Can you shut up so that I don't get a headache while I kill you?" she asked, chipping a trash can into the air with her foot and, with a quick spin, kicking it over to him. Spider-Man caught the trash can and threw it aside, not noticing Elektra leaping towards him. He spotted her a second before she reached him but his attempt to leap away was too late. She grabbed hold of his knee and pulled herself up, slamming two fingers into the crook of his neck. An agonizing sensation shot all over his body as all of his muscles locked, causing him to drop to the floor in a heap, his head slamming painfully off the tiled floors as his entire musculature system refused to work.

"Now for the finishing blow" Elektra growled, flipping her sai around once more and preparing to stab Spider-Man. Black Cat bit her lip from across the way and Shining raised his gun up, preparing to fire before a surprising event happened. Someone from behind Elektra slammed a fire extinguisher into the back of her head and knocked her to the floor, dazing her greatly. The man rushed over to Spider-Man and placed a hand on his back, checking to see if he was OK. Spider-Man's muscles relaxed and he pushed himself up, looking at the brown haired man and then over to Elektra.

"Thanks man" Spider-Man said "I think you just saved my life"

"No problem Spidey, you're my hero" the man said with a wide grin.

"Right... what's your name pal?" Spider-Man asked.

"Drake, Drake Love" he answered.

"Well Drake, it looks like you can go an brag to your friends about that fact you saved Spider-Man" Spider-Man said, patting him on the shoulder.

"Thanks... but can I ask you for something?" Drake asked.

"Go ahead, shoot" Spider-Man nodded.

"It was my birthday a few weeks back and I didn't really have anybody to celebrate it with, can you just wish me a good one?" Drake asked.

"Sure, Happy Birthday Drake" Spider-Man nodded, looking back over to Elektra as she began to stand up "Now get out of here before I have to wish you a Merry Christmas too"

"R-Right... and thanks Spider-Man" Drake grinned, getting up and running away.

"Don't thank me, I haven't saved the day just yet" Spider-Man said, getting back up to his feet and rubbing his sore neck "Alright then Elektra, you ready for round two?" Elektra appeared ready to respond but before she could the skylight of the mall was shattered as several SWAT officers abseiled into the mall with the sounds of sirens being heard outside.

"Shit... consider yourself lucky Spider-Man, we'll settle this later!" Elektra swore, sheathing her sigh and leaping through a window before the police could apprehend her, Black Cat following son after with a wink and a blown kiss for Spider-Man.

"Spider-Man, stay right where you are!" a man with a megaphone yelled from outside "We have this place surrounded and you are under arrest!"

"Oh this is not good" Spider-Man sighed as the SWAT team surrounded him and aimed their weapons "Ummm, can I use my get out of jail free card now?"

The sounds of their weapons being primed served as a satisfactory reply.

"I'll take that as a no then" Spider-Man nodded.

Back to Training

Spider-Man held his hands up in front of him as the SWAT members moved slowly closer to him, the green laser sights aimed perfectly at his chest and ready to fire at a moment's notice. One of the SWAT members finally reached Spider-Man and attempted to grab hold of his hands when a deep voice called out to him.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you" the voice said. The SWAT officers whirled around to see Nick Fury walking towards them.

"Who are you?" one of the officers demanded. Fury ignored the question and continued speaking as he moved closer towards them.

"He's got a rare condition mixed with unstable genetic manipulation, it makes him extremely contagious to normal humans" Fury explained.

"What... what are you talking about?" another officer asked in a nervous tone.

"I'm saying that the mask he wears isn't just for a disguise, its got a special layer in it that filters out the toxic spores his lungs release due to his illness, they're extremely deadly to normal humans if released and if you take his mask off now, there's no telling what damage they could do to us and the rest of the city" Fury said, stopping in front of the officer pointing a rifle at him.

"What do you mean the rest of the city?" he asked.

"The spores are extremely contagious and can infect other people's lungs, poisoning their oxygen supply while at the same time rapidly infecting the host's lungs and causing each release of breath to spread more and more spores, airborne and almost impossible to stop" Fury went on "Your police department, even your containment cells and isolation, can't stop the spores from spreading"

"So you're saying he's a bio-hazard?" a third officer asked.

"Exactly, now my co-workers and I are able to contain him and keep us all safe but only if you hand him over and let us do our job" Fury said "Are you going to make the right choice?"

"I... I don't know sir, I'm going to have to see some kind of ID" the officer in front of Fury said "And I'm going to have to radio my superior, you know, standard protocol"

"I understand perfectly young man" Fury nodded with a kind smile, looking over at Cadance suddenly "Your Majesty, would you be able to get your Aunt on the phone and explain to them the situation?" Cadance looked at Shining and then back at Spider-Man before nodding slowly.

"Just gimme a sec" Cadance sighed, taking out her phone and calling Celestia.

"So the Princess should be able to convince you and if you can get on the radio to your superior then we can get this done quickly" Fury said "Protocol's a bitch isn't it?"

"You're dead right sir" the man said, grabbing hold of his radio and explaining the story to his CO. There was the sound of metal tearing and they all looked over to see Black Widow standing with two halves of a trash can in her gloved hands, her green eyes examining the trash can with scrutiny.

"What... what's she doing?" one of the other officers asked.

"She does this sometimes" Fury said "Just don't say anything"

"Sir... I'm not sure she's allowed to be here" another officer said slowly.

"What are you crazy?" a fifth officer scoffed "That's the Black Widow, she's a member of the Avengers, the guys that saved our asses two years back from the alien invasion"

"Really?" the second officer asked "I seem to remember the Hulk and Iron Man doing most of the work" At this comment Black Widow's eyes shot up and she glared furiously at the SWAT officers, a strand of her thick blood red hair falling over her face. The officers all fell silent as she cast the trash can's halves aside and stormed over to them, her boots clicking on the floor as she walked.

"Come on Widow, don't beat them up" Spider-Man said "They don't know what they're talking about"

"Hey! Keep quiet you, we don't want you spreading your spores everywhere!" an officer yelled, aiming his gun at Spider-Man.

"Let him talk, tell me Spider-Man, what exactly happened here?" Widow asked.#

"Well to start off I heard gunshots at a store, saw a dead guy, saw Black Cat shoot a guy in the face, fought her for a while, beat her and then some chick in a ninja suit named Elektra jumped in and she-" Spider-Man explained.

"Wait" Widow said, holding up her hand "Did you just say Elektra?"

"Yeah... why? Is she bad news?" Spider-Man asked, looking back and forth between Fury and Widow.

"She was bad news until Daredevil managed to take her down... or so we thought" Fury said, crossing his arms and sighing "The last we heard of her was when Daredevil threw her off a cliff in a scuffle after he'd taken down Silvermane a few years back, it was Elektra, Silver Sable and the Black Cat working together for Silvermane back when he was the leading crime boss in Manhattan, we worked together with Daredevil and the Fantastic Four to bring him down and end his partnership with Doctor Doom-"

"Hold up... Doctor Doom?" Spider-Man asked "Who the hell is that?"

"His real name is Victor Von Doom, he's the monarch of a little country out in the sticks named Latveria" Fury explained.

"He's still the monarch? You guys didn't dethrone him or anything?" Spider-Man asked.

"He was outside of our jurisdiction, we couldn't arrest him because we haven't got any authority outside America and the Latverians wouldn't turn in their king" Fury sighed.

"And? We're the United States of America remember? We couldn't just slap together some half-assed excuse about looking for weapons of mass destruction and invade them in the name of freedom? I mean for fuck's sake that's like the biggest thing America's known for besides being overweight, being arrogant and sitting out of wars until the last few yards and taking all the credit for winning them!" Spider-Man snapped

"Do you hate this country or something?" one of the police officers asked.

"No, I understand it" Spider-Man said "And that makes it much worse"

"Anyway, back on topic, Elektra was presumed to be dead as she was knocked off a cliff and into a Latverian river where her body was never recovered" Fury explained "If she's back now that's gonna mean a lot more trouble for us... and for you Widow" Black Widow moved the strand of hair from her face and crossed her arms, looking down at the ground with a thoughtful expression.

"Why for her?" Spider-Man asked.

"Because Elektra is a very proud assassin with only two defeats to her name, the second from Daredevil and the first being from our lovely Black Widow" Fury said "And she's always wanted to settle the score with Widow after she beat her and left her for dead in Hong Kong"

"What were you doing in Hong Kong?" Spider-Man asked.

"I was ordered to track down Johnny Blaze to try and get him to enlist with S.H.I.E.L.D but he refused to" Black Widow said "But we found out that Elektra was there as well and she'd been hired to try and kill Johnny"

"Ah, I see... who's Johnny Blaze again?" Spider-Man asked in a puzzled tone.

"Ghost Rider" Fury answered quickly.

"Oh, that guy is really cool" Spider-Man nodded.

"She's not answering her phone" Cadance announced "Do you want me to try calling Luna instead?"

"Well, to keep this short I'm sure you can give your approval Cadance, being a princess and all, and the word from Shining, as the police captain, should be more than enough to keep this legal and peaceful" Fury said, looking at the married couple with a smile "So, what are your answers?"

"I say you can take him" Cadance said quickly. Shining considered the motion, looking at Spider-Man, the Black Widow and back to Fury again before nodding slowly.

"You've got a green light" he answered.

"Good, now come on kid, we've gotta get you back to the Triskellion for your medical exam" Fury said. Spider-Man nodded and walked away from the SWAT team, coughing quietly as he did so and causing the SWAT team to quickly move away from him. As Fury put an arm around Peter's shoulder he leaned close to him and spoke.

"You better have a damn good reason why you let Elektra and the Black Cat get away" Fury growled.

"They're better than I am?" Spider-Man offered.

"I can see that now" Fury sighed "We'll try to make sure that next time you're better equipped to deal with them"


"If you're going to stand a chance against Elektra then you're going to need to understand how she fights" Black Widow said, circling Peter in the boxing ring as she wore a supported training shirt and a pair of training pants, the tight fitting clothing showing off her slender-yet-strong figure to an almost distracting degree.

"Like myself, Elektra has been trained in several different styles of martial arts, ranging from Tai Chi to Jeet Kune Do with a wider variety of Thai and Japanese martial arts adapted to her own signature style, she's prefers to use pressure point combat to subdue her enemies and then finish them off with her sai but she can, and will, resort to simply but powerful strikes if she needs to" Black Widow explained "Remember that she often uses her arms in combat and while she can use her legs to fight, she isn't as skilled with those as she wants to be, if you can find a way to stop her from using her hands then I'd recommend doing so"

"So you're telling me that she's pretty much one of the most gifted fighters in existence?" Peter asked, a worried tone in his voice.

"Gifted isn't the right word, she's one of the best through a matter of skill, and she's far too skilled for you to even attempt fighting" Black Widow continued.

"So what am I supposed to do?" Peter asked slowly.

"I'm going to train you to be able to stand a chance against her" Black Widow answered "Or at least survive long enough to run away and find someone who can handle themselves in a fight"

"That sounds like a... wait, what d'you mean some who can handle themselves?" Peter asked "Are you saying I can't fight?"

"To put it bluntly Parker I can believe that Jaden Smith could win the tournament in the remake of the Karate Kid than I can believe you being able to handle Elektra, or Black Cat for that matter" Widow said. Peter glared angrily at Widow for a long moment before she cocked an eyebrow and smiled arrogantly.

"If you think you can prove me wrong then go ahead and try" she said, cracking her knuckles loudly and settling into a fighting stance. Peter squared his stance and rushed forward, throwing a punch for Widow's face only to have he use the side of her forearm to brush the attack aside and with a confident step forward she slammed her elbow into his throat, hooked a foot around his ankle and pulling it towards to upset his balance and slam her palm into his chest, knocking him flat onto his backside.

"Just like I thought" she sighed disappointedly "You're completely hopeless"

"No I'm not" Peter growled, kicking back up to his feet and squaring his stance again "Let me try again"

"We can try all you want Parker, I don't think we're going to get anywhere any time soon" Widow nodded, spreading her feet apart and holding up her arms "Go ahead" Peter's second movement involved a jutting kick which Widow used her palm to push high above her and then with a quick skid forward she used her foot to sweep Peter's remaining leg out from underneath him. He landed hard on the floor and Widow pressed her foot to his throat.

"Down again" Widow nodded "Tell you what, I'll try attacking you this time and then we see how well you can defend" Peter nodded and stood up, returning to his starting point and straightening himself up. Widow stood still for a brief second before rushing forward and launching herself upward with a powerful knee strike. Peter held his palm out in front of her and caught the blow, pushing her back down to the floor. He'd learned his mistake about gloating after successfully blocking an attack from fighting Captain America and as such he returned to a defensive mindset.

"Good block" Widow said as she landed back on both feet, lifting her leg up for a rapid roundhouse kick that Peter was barely able to duck under. She landed again and feinted a punch for Peter's knee joint, something he fell for, and as he bent down to block the strike she rose up and cracked him in the jaw with her fist. He quickly used his adhesive powers to stay on his feet and attempted to block Widow's follow up attack, an outwards elbow strike to his jaw with the same arm she'd thrown the punch with. Peter dodged to the side and threw his own punch, aiming for her stomach. She caught the attack with the side of her leg, sweeping it outwards to push Peter's hand aside, before stepping forward and kneeing him in the groin.

"Fuck!" Peter grunted as he bent over instinctively, the agony of the strike taking over his body. Widow grinned and with a large arc she brought her foot up and kicked him in the face, the blow knocking him off balance and, due to his focus on his testicular pain his powers were not active, sent him careening to the floor. The dust flew up from the boxing ring floor as Widow lowered her leg back down to the floor slowly, dusting her hands and placing them on her hips.

"Alright, so your defence is better than your offence but both are terrible" Widow sighed "I think we're going to need to go back to basics here"

"Why didn't we start with basics first?" Peter asked in a pained voice.

"Because I had faith in you to be better than basics" Widow answered "I won't be making that mistake again" Widow waited for Peter to clamber back up to his feet, still bending his legs as the aching pains from his groin still controlled him.

"I think we'll start with basic movement and positioning" Widow said "You've done a few karate classes in your lifetime I presume?"

"Uh, no actually" Peter said sheepishly "I've watched a few Kung Fu movies though if that helps" Widow looked down at the ground for a second with her palm to her forehead.

"This is really going to push me to my limits, Fury better appreciate this" she growled.

"I appreciate it" Peter said.

"What are you talking about?" Widow asked snappily, looking up at him with a confused expression.

"I mean that I'm grateful that you're willing to take time out of your day to try and teach an idiot kid like me how to defend himself" Peter said "Its something I know that's hard for you to do and I just want to say thank you for even attempting it" Widow's nostrils flared furiously as Peter spoke, her eyes glaring daggers at him and by the time he had finished she was gripping her own arm in blazing anger.

"You appreciate it?" she demanded "I'm only going to tell you this once, so listen closely, I would rather do anything than teach your stupid ass how to fight, I'm not taking time out of my day to do this, this has, for some stupid reason, become a part of my list of extremely difficult jobs to earn a living, so now turn around and face the wall before I throw you out of this ring for talking like such an idiot Parker" Peter's eyes looked down at the floor as the smile dropped from his face. His shoulders sagged as he slowly turned around with a quiet sigh. As soon as Peter was no longer looking at him she released the tight grip on her arm and lifted a hand up to a loose strand of hair, twirling it around her finger as a smile briefly touched her rouged lips.

"Alright then you bumbling idiot" she said, faking an angry tone "Let's get on with teaching you about how to tell what an enemy's strong and weak sides are and how to combat against that"

A New Target to Hunt

Luna sat at the desk in her office, a large stack of paperwork piled up to her eye line with her fountain pen scratching loudly in contrast the near-silent room. Luna had been sitting at the desk for the past three hours, preparing a report to submit for a police inquiry about the current situation at Oscorp and acquiring a warrant in order to search the premises. The light had long since faded and the lights had been turned up as bright as they could go to keep Luna's tired eyes as stimulated as possible, her blue orbs scanning the paper for any kinds of mistakes through her thin spectacles.

"They better approve this or I swear I will cut their funding for the next seventy five years" she growled. There came a faint rattle of the door on the other side of the office that Luna noted but paid no more attention to once she determined it to be nothing more than a draft. This assumption was proven to be false as the door was kicked off its hinges a moment later and a woman garbed in red stormed inside.

"Stay right where you are!" the woman ordered. Luna remained still, replacing the cap on her pen and taking off her spectacles and linking her fingers.

"Do you have a reason to be here or are you simply enjoying the night?" Luna asked coldly.

"Spider-Man? What do you know about him?" she demanded.

"I know that he's nothing more than an arrogant little man hiding behind a mask who feels as if it is his responsibility to take the law into his own hands and in the process bastardize and corrupt the criminal justice system of this country that I worked so hard to create and maintain" Luna stated "Why?"

"Where is he?" she asked.

"I propose a counter question; how do you expect me to know that?" Luna asked "Or better yet, why do you expect me to know that?"

"You're supposed to know everything about your country Princess, where is the Spider-Man?" she asked again.

"I can say honestly that I do not know, now I'm going to have to ask you to leave my home before I have to remove you myself" Luna said in a calm tone.

"I'm not going anywhere until you tell me-" she began only to be cut off by Luna standing up and throwing the solid oak desk at her. She leaped over the flying object but as she landed Luna dashed forward and slammed a fist into her face, knocking her back several steps. The two of them stared furiously at her before the woman in red threw herself at Luna, unleashing a flurry of punches and kicks that Luna managed to block without missing a beat. One of the final punches the woman threw Luna caught and twisted, causing the woman to cry out and lean forward to prevent her arm from breaking. Luna seized the opportunity and slammed her fist into the woman's face, sending blood and spit flying out of her mouth.

"I'm going to ask you one more time Elektra, get out of my home" Luna growled. Elektra nodded her head slowly, attempting to get back to her feet, but upon standing up straight she unleashed an outward elbow strike aimed for Luna's throat. Luna caught the elbow and grabbed hold of Elektra's arm.

"Amateur mistake girl" Luna hissed. Twisting Elektra's arm backwards Luna kneed her in the base of the spine, causing Elektra to cry out in pain. Forcing her to stand on the tips of her toes to remain on her feet Luna lowered her slightly and brought her knee up into her back, another powerful cry coming from Elektra's lips. Luna then grabbed hold of the bottom of her chin and slammed her head repeatedly into the stone wall. Blood began to smear on the wall as Luna slammed Elektra's head for a fourth time before switching her grasp to her throat and choke slamming her into the floor.

"You're a damn fool girl, you walk into my house, threaten me in my own office and then try to attack me too?" Luna asked, placing her foot to Elektra's throat "I should break your neck like the little chicken you are girl, I can see from the way you fight you're cocky, you think you're invincible" Luna grabbed hold of Elektra's clothing and lifted her up above her head, pressing her against the wall as the beaten women groaned in pain.

"But, being the generous ruler that I am, I'm going to let you live" Luna said "And I'm going to give you the warning to never, ever try anything like this again, do you understand me?" Elektra let out a pained wail before Luna turned around and threw her out of the office window, the glass shattering and cutting deeply into her flesh as she fell down into the fountain outside the mansion. As the water washed over her face and the strength came back to her body she felt a new form of anger burning inside her, a new form of pure hatred for the Princess. She now had a third nemesis to add to her list and she swore that once she had taken care of Black Widow, she was coming after Luna.

And the next time they met she would be more than ready.

A Shock to the System

The young man was pushed violently into the chair by Hammerhead, his brown eyes filled with terror and his hands shaking violently.

"Calm down kid, we ain't gonna hurt ya... that bad at least" Hammerhead chuckled, pressing a button on a phone to engage the speaker function "We just want to talk to ya"

"Max Dillon" the voice of the Big Man said through the phone "We understand that your father has racked up some serious gambling debt, a debt that he owes to my... organisation, this is true is it not?" The young man looked up at Hammerhead who merely gestured for him to answer the question.

"Y-Yes... Sir" Max answered in a terrified voice "T-This isn't about getting the money is it? Because if it is t-then I can get it to you soon, I just need more time"

"In a way yes, this is about the money, and we are also aware that you'll never be able to pay us back, three hundred thousand dollars isn't something that one can easily amass, especially in your position Max, being an unemployed engineer isn't one of the most high-earning jobs in America is it now?"

"So... what do you want me to do?" Max asked carefully, obviously afraid of what was going to happen.

"Well, its quite simple you see, Hammerhead and I have agreed that the money you need to pay can be forgotten and your father can continue to get his addiction cured by the good folks at his rehab centre" the Big Man said.

"R-Really?" he asked with a wide smile "That's great news Sir... thank you!"

"I'm not finished" the Big Man said, causing Max to fall silent "We will agree to wipe away the debt on one condition; you can kill the Spider-Man"

"What?" Max asked in a horrified voice "I-I can't kill anyone, especially Spider-Man!"

"Not yet you can't, but we're planning to change that Max" the Big Man responded.

"How?" Max asked, looking up at Hammerhead.

"Just follow my associate's orders and you'll soon see" the Big Man said before ending the call. There was the sound of a door opening and Norman Osborn walked into the room with a very displeased look on his face.

"Mr Dillon" he said loudly "If you'll follow me?"

"Move it kid" Hammerhead said, grabbing hold of Max's arm and dragging him out of the chair.


Peter took his phone out of his pocket as he felt it vibrate violently. He checked the caller ID to see Twilight's name show up and he quickly answered it before placing it to his ear.

"Yello?" he asked.

"Who the hell was she?!" Twilight demanded furiously. Peter winced from the sheer volume of Twilight's screech and he reminded himself to hold the phone away from his ear the next time he answered a call.

"I'm sorry?" Peter asked.

"That... that slut in the black outfit!" Twilight roared "Who the fuck was she!?"

"She's just some crook I've been chasing after for a few weeks, she's no big deal" Peter shrugged "What's the big problem?"

"The problem?" Twilight asked in a surprised tone, as if she couldn't fathom why Peter couldn't see the issue "The problem is that I watched some random slut sexually harass my brother and my sister-in-law... and after I heard the way she talked to you I felt like I wanted to vomit there and then!"

"Twilight, I can understand why you're upset about what she said to Shning and Cadance, but... why are you so mad about the way she talked to me?" Peter asked.

"Because... because you're my friend Peter, I care about you and I don't want to see anything bad happen to you" Twilight said affectionately.

"Are you sure its just because I'm your friend?" Peter asked "You're not jealous are you?"

"No... I could never be jealous of a whore like that" Twilight said "You... you don't like her do you?"

"No... well..." Peter said, scratching the back of his head and exhaling slowly.

"You can't be serious?" Twilight asked "Please tell me you're not serious?"

"I don't know Twilight, I'm still trying to figure out whether she's just playing me or not" Peter sighed.

"And what if she isn't Peter?" Twilight asked slowly "What are you gonna do then?"

"I said I don't know" Peter repeated.

"Alright, you don't have to snap at me" Twilight said defensively.

"I didn't snap at you" Peter said "Are you sure you're not jealous?"

"I said I'm fine!" Twilight growled "Can we stop talking about this?"

"You called me just to talk about this" Peter said in a confused tone "What else do you want to talk about?"

"I wanna talk about u... about... nevermind" Twilight said awkwardly "See you later"

"Twilight, what are you-" Peter said before the call ended suddenly, Twilight having hung up on him "Ah shit... I really should go talk to her" Peter stood still for a moment, staring at the blacked out screen of his phone before nodding once and stuffing it back into his pocket, cutting through congested traffic to try and find a decent alley to change into his superhero duds.


Max stood in the cold room with his hands strapped into a cold grey machine. His clothes had been removed from him and he was unable to see out of the two way mirror in front of him but still able to hear the voices of the people behind it.

"W... What exactly are you going to do to me?" Max asked in a frightened tone.

"Its quite simple really, we're going to use this little machine I've developed to increase the electron number in your atoms in order to give you a super-charged molecular structure and then we're going to use a very painless machine to rewrite a simple line of genetic code to allow your body's cells to naturally produce an electrical current" Osborn explained dryly "This will give you the power to kill Spider-Man and wipe away your debts"

"I don't know... can't I use my powers for something better, like saving people and getting the money that way?" Max asked.

"Listen to me kid, there's no faster way in this world to make a buck and then make a hell of a lot more than doin' it illegally, you can try and do good to get your chump change and nickels and dimes, or can you use this new juice you're gettin' to strut your way straight to the bank and take as much as you want" Hammerhead advised "Just as long as you make sure the Big Man gets his cut"

"I don't know... are you sure?" Max asked, his heart rate increasing the more he thought about it.

"You do wanna make sure your dad lives to see sixty right?" Hammerhead asked.

"Of course I do" Max nodded.

"Then shut your mouth and hold still, this might tickle" Osborn interrupted, flipping the switch behind the mirror to activate the genetic manipulator. There was a faint buzzing sound heard and Max looked around for a moment.

"I don't feel anythi-" he began before an enormous surge of electricity was blasted through the machine and into his body. A loud scream tore from his lips as he arched his back, feeling as if his very flesh was being burned from his bones.

"Stop!" he screamed "Please stop!"

"Be strong kid, for dear ol' dad remember?" Hammerhead shouted from behind the mirror, seeing the young man's face contort with searing pain as the electricity began to cover his flesh, smoke rising from the quickly dying tissue only to be replaced with surging volts.

"And now we add the stabilizer gene" Norman said, hitting a button to activate the genetic rewrite function. A large, three-pronged device swung down from the ceiling and stabbed itself into Max's back, blood running down from the injury. He screamed ever louder as the device began to buzz and whirr, its resistance to electricity being the key factor in this situation. Max's screams finally died out as his entire body became covered, became built up of, surging, crackling blue electricity.

"And he's done" Norman scowled, killing the power to the machine and watching as the device retracted from his back and he dropped as far down as his fastened hands would allow him to.

"There we go kid, now was that so bad?" Hammerhead asked.

"What... what did you do to me?" he asked, statically charged tears running down his face.

"We improved you, take a minute to get used to your new body" Norman said "But only a minute, I've got more important work to return to than this" Max wiped the tears from his face, staring at his bright blue hands, rubbing them against each other to find that he was unable to feel anything, his nerve endings have been burned away with the rest of his flesh.

"How do I turn this off?" Max asked quietly.

"Excuse me?" Norman asked.

"How do I turn it off?!" Max bellowed furiously, the lights in the room dimming as the electric man screamed "Tell me how to turn it off!"

"Don't worry, we will young man" Norman said slowly "Just as soon as you fulfil your part of the bargain"

"K-Kill Spider-Man" Max muttered, placing his hands to his face and sobbing quietly.

"Good man" Hammerhead grinned "Now get yourself together and we can set you about finding our favourite little spider"

"Can... can I see my dad first?" Max asked.

"I wouldn't recommend it" Norman said coldly.

"Please... just let me see him first" Max begged.

"Whatever you want kid, just get yourself ready to kill off the wall-crawler" Hammerhead nodded "You've got a long day left to go"


Spider-Man landed lightly on the roof of a building in Hell's Kitchen, sitting down on an air vent for a quick break to catch his breath and to reload his web-shooters. After ejecting the cartridges and storing them in a special compartment in his bag he stood up and prepared himself to set out again before he noticed Black Cat sitting on the edge of the rooftop with her legs crossed and resting on her hands.

"Hello Spider" she giggled "Fancy meeting you here at this time of night"

"What do you want Cat?" Spider-Man asked.

"What do I want? I was here first buddy" Black Cat chuckled "Care for a chat? I promise I won't bite, unless you want me to?"

"I really shouldn't, I'm supposed to be seeing somebody else" Spider-Man said.

"She can wait a while longer" Black Cat said, patting the spot on the roof next to her. Spider-Man thought it over for a second, weighing up the fact that Twilight didn't know he was coming and thus she wouldn't be expecting him which meant she wouldn't be disappointed if he didn't show up. Shrugging his shoulders he walked over to her and sat down next to her, looking at the brighter parts of the city in the distance.

"Its a beautiful night, isn't it? Black Cat asked.

"Yeah, its good that the smog in the city's come down in the past couple of years" Spider-Man nodded.

"All thanks to our lovely Celestia's Greener Green Apple project" Black Cat chuckled.

"Such a stupid name" Spider-man smirked.

"I know right?" Black Cat asked "You know... I used to... oh never mind"

"What?" Spider-Man asked.

"Forget about it, its stupid" Black Cat with a wave of her hand "You'd probably think I was just childish"

"No, go ahead, what were you gonna say?" Spider-Man asked.

"Well, I was gonna say that when I was young, my dad used to let me sit with him on the balcony of our penthouse and look out over the city" Black Cat said, looking out over the city with a dreamy expression "He used to point at different parts of the city and tell me all of the valuable and precious things that were in those places and how he wanted them all"

"Was your father a cat burglar too?" Spider-Man asked.

"Yeah, thieving is kind of a family business" she nodded with a soft smile "Not exactly honest, but its a living"

"Yeah, definitely not honest" Spider-Man chuckled. Black Cat smiled genuinely before continuing her story.

"He used to tell me something, he'd sit me down and say 'Listen to me my darling, there are many things in this world that people have that you don't, and you'll want these things for yourself, now being the man I am and being in the family we are I've always said that those who hold the power hold the rights, the rights to a good life and the rights to live lavishly, if you have the power to take it all then it belongs to you already'" Black Cat explained "When I was a little girl I thought that I'd grow up to be a princess or a model or something, but when my dad told me that I knew that one day I'd have the power to have it all and that day is today" Spider-Man looked at her for a long second before he straightened up and leaned over the edge, resting his forearms on his knees.

"I think your father's definition of what power means is completely different from mine" he chuckled.

"What did your father say?" Black Cat asked.

"My father always said that if you have the power to do good things, then you'd have a moral obligation to do those things" Spider-Man explained "Or to put it in a much cooler way; With Great Power Comes Great Responsibility"

"And is that why you do what you do Spider?" Black Cat asked "You work tirelessly for a thankless public that hate you no matter what you do?"

"Yeah, but when you put it like that I guess it does sound kinda shitty" Spider-Man said "But I have a better reason... when I first got my powers, I was a dick with them, I abused my power and humiliated the guy who'd bullied me my entire school life, I humiliated him in front of his entire basketball team and then beat the shit out of him"

"Understandable" Black Cat nodded "I would do the same thing myself"

"But as I acted like a dick I got in trouble with the principal of my school to the point where my Uncle was called in to see her" Spider-Man said "We argued for a while and I stormed away, making him come looking for me" He put a hand to his face and sighed loudly, Black Cat sitting up and placing a gentle hand on his back, encouraging him to continue.

"I went to buy a drink at the store nearby and got into an argument with the cashier, but when I was in there some guy came in and robbed the place, throwing me the drink I'd wanted but the store guy wouldn't let me have" Spider-Man continued "To say thanks I didn't stop him, I had my powers and I could've stopped him, but because I was just a pissy little teenager I let him go and then I left the store"

"Did you change your mind and try to stop him?" Black Cat asked, still massaging his back slowly.

"No, the store owner came running out and screaming about being robbed... and my Uncle was nearby at this point and... he tried to stop the robber" Spider-Man said, his throat becoming tighter as he recited the story "The guy had a gun and when my Uncle tried to stop him he... he shot him" Black Cat placed a hand to her mouth in shock, her eyes seeming much more caring and considerate than usual.

"Oh my God" she mumbled.

"Yeah, the guy who I let go was the same mother fucker who killed my Uncle" Spider-man said, choking up one the last word. At this point Black Cat rolled over and straddled his waist, wrapping his arms around his chest and holding him close.

"You poor thing" she said softly "So that's why you do what you do"

"Pretty much, I promised to make sure that I never let another soul die because I didn't do anything about it, I have the power to protect the people so its my job to protect the people, whether they want me to or not" Spider-Man nodded. Black Cat lifted her head up and placed it against his forehead, closing her eyes and listening to him breath.

"Well I want you to protect me" she said, moving her hands to his chest, then up to his neck "I want you in my life" She tucked her thumbs underneath his mask and pulled it up to his mouth once more.

"Kiss me Spider" she said, her lips centimetres from his. She placed her hands on his face as he placed his hands on her hips, their lips meeting and tongues sliding into each other's mouth. The sound of Black Cat's satisfied moan sent shivers down Spider-Man's body, his grip on her body becoming slightly tighter as his excitement grew. The two kissed for a long minute, neither wanting their moment to end, but they were interrupted by the sound of sirens wailing in the distance and the bright form of a burning apartment building.

"Don't go" Black Cat said, kissing him softly on the neck, her red lipstick leaving a stain on his flesh "Can't you let this one slide?"

"Better suggestion; come with me and help" Spider-Man said, running his hands over her voluptuous rear "You'll feel good about yourself"

"I don't know, I feel pretty good right now" Cat said playfully, pecking him gently on the lips once more.

"Just try it?" Spider-Man asked "You'll sleep better at night knowing you did a good deed" Black Cat looked at Spider-Man and then back to the burning building before sighing loudly.

"Alright, fine, but just this once" she chuckled "But you better pay me back for this"

"Justice is its own reward Kitty-Cat" Spider-Man grinned, pulling his mask down over his face and standing up with Cat's slender figure still clinging to him.

"Not to me it isn't Wonder-Boy" Black Cat grinned "But let's get going, I'm nearly ready for bed"

Time Goes By... Really Freakin' Fast!

Spider-Man swung his arm out, swatting aside a falling, blazing timber a moment before it pinned him down under its weight.

"So Cat..." he called out to his one-time partner "What was that back there?"

"What d'you mean?" she asked, punching through a door, covering her mouth as an eruption of smoke poured out of the room.

"The whole... kiss thing, you know?" he said, covering his mouth under the mask as he coughed, the black smoke beginning to affect his lungs.

"Oh right, yeah... sorry about that buddy, I kinda got a little emotional for a second there" she chuckled "Don't think I was serious"

"Oh" he said, a knot forming in his throat as a deflated feeling took control of him "Right"

"You're not disappointed are you?" she asked playfully.

"Maybe a little" he shrugged, booting down a door and calling out for anyone who might be in the room.

"I don't date, nothing personal of course but its just my policy" she said, quickly followed by a cough. There suddenly came a cry for help from inside the room Spider-Man had just opened, a young voice screaming in terror.

"Spidey!" Cat yelled.

"I got it!" he yelled back, sprinting into the room and yelling out again.

"Where are you?!" he called.

"I... I'm in the closet!" the voice screamed "Please help me!" Spider-Man quickly surveyed the room before his eyes fell onto the closet, a large wooden timber having fallen down in front of it and trapping the child inside.

"Just hold on!" Spider-Man ordered "I'm getting you out of there!" With a swift kick he managed to move the timber out of the way without injuring himself, but the impact of the timber hitting the floor caused it to crash through it and down into the lower level.

"Well... we can put a fireman's pole there later" he shrugged before tearing open the closet door and seeing a small blond boy cowering in fear. His eyes lit up as he saw the costumed superhero and he held his arms out in front of him, begging to be saved. Spider-Man grabbed hold of the child by the torso and hoisted him up onto his back.

"Hold on, I'm gonna get you out of here" he promised "What does your mother look like?"

"She's... got blond hair like me... and she was wearing a white shirt and black pants" he said, coughing loudly due to the smoke.

"Then let's get going!" Spider-Man grunted, charging out of the room, scanning it for Black Cat but noticing that she was nowhere to be seen. Spider-Man closed in on the open window at the end of the hall and with a quick jump he shot through the opening and out into the fresh night air.

"Hold on!" Spider-Man warned as the force of gravity began to take hold, the child tightening his grip in response. He used his webbing to slow down their fall and they landed safely on the ground, fire fighters rushing out of the building with a train of people behind them.

"That's it!" one of them yelled "That's everyone out!" A woman came rushing over to Spider-Man as he set the child down on the ground.

"Oh my God!" she yelled, tears streaming down her face "My baby!" She wrapped her arms around her son and sobbed into his shoulder for a long second, the child hugging his mother tightly.

"I'm OK Mom, Spider-Man saved me" he said, looking up at the costumed hero. The woman looked up at him with a teary smile before speaking.

"Thank you Spider-Man... I'll never believe a word the Daily Bugle says about you again" she said in a shaky voice.

"The Daily Bugle?" Spider-Man asked "What're they saying about me?"

"You mean you haven't read the paper recently?" she asked, blinking in surprise "The owner of the paper's started a smear campaign against you"

"What!?" Spider-Man demanded "What for?"

"He... he thinks you're a criminal" she answered "But he's wrong"

"Damn right he's wrong... I'm gonna go have a little talk with our editor in chief right now!" Spider-Man snapped before he realized what time it currently was "Uh... when do the doors to the Bugle shut?"

"Eight PM I think" she said "Its nearly eleven PM now" Spider-Man recoiled in shock upon hearing the time. He was nearly two hours late on his curfew and his Aunt was going to kill him for it.

"Excuse me I, uh, think I left my dishwasher plugged in" he said awkwardly, turning away from the others, still seeing no sign of Black Cat anywhere, before firing a web-line and swinging off into the city.


"Hand it over" Aunt May said in a harsh tone.

"Do I have to?" Peter asked, clinging to his phone as if it were his own child.

"Well seeing as how you don't know how to use that phone of yours, I figure you don't need a phone" she growled "Hand. It. Over" Peter looked solemnly at his phone for a long second before placing it softly in his aunt's hand.

"You take good care of that" Peter whimpered.

"Stop being so pathetic" May sighed, stuffing the phone into her pocket and looking at her nephew with a confused expression.

"Peter... why do you smell of smoke?" she asked.

"Oh, uh, on the way home I got caught downwind from a burning building, smoke was billowing all over the place and I accidentally ran through a cloud of it" Peter said quickly, keeping his face as still as possible to not give away his half-truth.

"Really?" May asked in a disbelieving tone "And you haven't just been smoking?"

"No, it should be on the news by now" Peter said, pointing at the TV "We can watch it if you want?"

"No Peter, I can watch it" May corrected "You can go sit in your room and do nothing"

"What?" Peter asked in a horrified tone "Why?"

"Because you're grounded" May said, snapping her fingers and pointing to the stairs "Go on boy, get upstairs" Peter looked at his aunt with a very bemused look in his eyes, this causing the woman's stern face to falter for a second and a smile to crack briefly. Peter grinned back only to have his aunt move forward quickly with a new angry expression, this terrifying the young man and causing him to sprint out of the living room and up the stairs. He walked into his room and sat down on the bed, crossing his arms and glaring angrily at the carpeted floor.

"This is bullshit" he growled "You can't ground Spider-Man"

Ice Cold Reception

Peter sat with his legs crossed, hunched over an old skateboard deck he'd pulled off the shelves in his room, the bottom of it covered in hastily-scrawled equations and scientific formulae from several years ago. He'd removed the protective film from the board and had drilled several new holes into the board in order to fit the riser, trucks and wheels into place. He'd decided to go for harder wheels this time around, sacrificing grip for speed, as he put together a new skateboard to replace the one that had been crushed when he'd first gotten his powers.

"Now I just need to tighten this screw..." Peter said, gently twisting the screwdriver with an intense look of focus on his face "And this puppy'll be all finished up" As he felt a great amount of resistance against the movement of the screwdriver he decided that it was tight enough. He quickly tested the rigidity of the trucks before sliding his hand down the grip tape on the top of the board.

"Fresh and unused" he chuckled "Perfect" He placed the board down on the floor and rolled it back and forth a few times, checking the stability of the board and how efficiently the wheels spun before leaning back on his hands, sighing loudly. He'd finished working on the new bored, cooked up a new batch of web fluid, injected it into and pressurized the cartridges, sneakily washed the stench of smoke out of his costume, stripped down and cleaned his web-shooters before reassembling them.

"Being grounded sucks" Peter sighed, sitting up straight again and stretching his legs out "I need air... I need to go for a swing" There came a brief knock at the door that got Peter's attention. He heard the door open and thought he heard a familiar voice but it was too quiet to tell. There was a conversation downstairs followed by his aunt shouting for him.

"On my way!" Peter yelled, dashing downstairs and seeing Harry talking to his aunt "Hey Harry"

"Hey Pete" Harry responded.

"Harry here is trying to convince me that I should let you go out for the day" she said "Why should I?"

"Because I'm the best nephew in the world?" Peter asked with a cheesy grin. May looked at him with a very unimpressed gaze and he scratched the back of his head.

"Because this time I'll stick to the rules and come home when I'm supposed to?" he tried again.

"Much better" May said with a nod "But I'm warning you, if you don't come home on time you're grounded for a week and I'll sell your phone to a trade-in store"

"Please no" Peter muttered.

"Then make sure you're on time" May said, handing his phone back to him.

"I will" Peter nodded, smiling gratefully at his aunt before looking at Harry "Gimme a sec, I need to get my shoes and my board"

"That reminds me, I haven't seen you on that thing in ages" Harry said, crossing his arms over his chest "Where'd it go?"

"Well... it got busted" Peter shrugged.

"What!?" May exclaimed "When did that happen?"

"A few weeks ago, don't worry though, I used a spare deck I had with a few extra pieces to put together a new one" Peter said quickly "So there's no reason to be mad"

"Except the fact you broke a board?" May asked, but Peter was already up the stairs. He lightly closed his door as he opened his drawers, opening the secret compartment in the top drawer and taking out his web-shooters. He fastened them onto his wrists, checking the pressure gauge before realizing they were brand new, slipped his shoes on and grabbed the new board. He darted back down the stairs, kissing his aunt on the cheek as he went past and with a quick pivot he faced Harry, patted him on the shoulder and headed out the door.

"Look after him" May said to Harry.

"I will Mrs Parker" Harry nodded with a grin "I have been for the past seven years"

"I know" May said with a kind smile "Thank you"

"No problem" Harry chuckled, waving goodbye to May as he turned around and followed after Peter who was already on the street preparing to set his board down and ride it "Hang on Pete!"

"You hurry up then!" the teen yelled back at his friend. May looked at the two teenagers and smiled happily, glad that they were still as good a set of friends could be, closing the door and going back to watching the TV.


"Are we nearly there yet?" Peter asked in a whiny voice.

"Yes, its just on the next block" Harry nodded. The two of them had gotten out of Queens and had taken the subway to Chelsea where they had walked for the past ten minutes in order to get to the cafe where Harry had said that the others were waiting for them.

"It better be or I'm gonna find a trash can it throw it into you" Peter growled.

"Don't you mean throw me into it?" Harry asked, looking over his shoulder and at his friend.

"No, I'll throw it so hard it'll consume you" Peter said in a faux threatening voice "You. Bin. Same thing" The two of them looked at each other for a brief moment before they cracked up, laughing at the sheer stupidity of Peter's last few sentences.

"Christ, its actually a miracle that you're my friend still dude" Peter chuckled.

"Why's that?" Harry asked, swerving around another group of people to avoid walking into them.

"Because I'm an absolute idiot?" Peter suggested with a grin "That's a good reason"

"Yeah, but so am I" Harry shrugged "That's why we're friends"

"Because we're idiots that nobody else likes so we just hung out with each other?" Peter asked.

"Sounds about right" Harry nodded "Come on, just over here" The two of them crossed the street and came to a small cafe where they could see Cadance's gorgeous locks of multicoloured hair in the window.

"Ah, so Cadance is here?" Peter asked.

"So are Celestia and Luna" Harry added "They all wanted a day out so we figured we'd just hang out together"

"Fair enough, thought I'm gonna have to ask for you to not make me sit next to Luna" Peter brought up.

"Why not?" Harry asked.

"Because she fucking hates me" Peter said in a matter-of-fact voice.

"Ah yes, slipped my mind for a moment" Harry said, now wise to the situation "No promises"

"Fuck you" Peter sighed, making his friend laugh as he opened the door and they walked into the cafe. Twilight was the first one to notice them, a wide smile on her face as she waved at her boyfriend and Peter. Harry waved back and Peter nodded at her, Harry explaining to the waiter that walked over what the situation was and after a confirming nod from Cadance they were allowed to approach them.

"Hey guys" Twilight said, taking a sip from the straw in her milkshake as the two teens sat down.

"Hey Twilight" they said.

"Hello you two, how have you been since we last met?" Celestia asked with a kind smile.

"I've been doing great" Harry said with his own smile in return "I've started proper business tuition with my Dad now and its gonna be a paid internship"

"That sounds great, what are you planning to spend the money on?" Cadance asked.

"Probably Twilight" Harry chuckled, winking at his girlfriend.

"Gay" Peter said quickly, looking over at the other side of the cafe while drumming his fingers on the table.

"Mature" Luna sighed, taking a sip from her own glass of lemonade.

"Its a joke Princess" Peter said quickly.

"I'm aware of that, I just thought that jokes were supposed to be witty" Luna said, rolling her eyes.

"Not of all them, sometimes they can be cold, strung-up and heartless" Peter said irritably "Which is what makes you the perfect example of one" Luna glared furiously at Peter and the teen returned the icy glare, the tension in the air thickening before Celestia stepped in to diffuse the situation.

"OK you two, that's about enough" Celestia said quickly, turning her eyes to Peter "What have you been up to recently?"

"Not much really, just sort of lazing around most days" Peter shrugged.

"Sounds awfully prophetic if you ask me" Luna stated.

"Luna" Celestia said sternly "Act your age already" Luna finished her drink and set it down loudly on the table.

"I'm going for a walk" she said, quickly standing up and leaving the cafe. Celestia sighed angrily and followed after her sister, leaving the others sitting in an awkward silence.

"Nice job Peter" Harry sighed, rubbing his eyes.

"What?" Peter asked "That wasn't my fault"

"You might not have started it but you sure as hell let it escalate" Twilight said "Could you have not kept cool for a few more minutes, you only just got here" Peter looked at the others who were looking at him with agitated and annoyed looks. He nodded his head, pressing his hands onto the table and standing up.

"Right, I get the point" he said "I'll fuck off then"

"Peter come on" Twilight groaned "Don't act like that?"

"Act like what?" Peter asked as he moved away from the table "Its obvious that I've ruined the moment, I'm only making it awkward by staying here so I'll just do us all a favour and leave so you can have fun again"

"Dude, really?" Harry asked "Don't be an idiot"

"Whatever" Peter hissed, stuffing his hand into his pocket and picking up his board on the way out. He could hear mutterings from the other people in the cafe but he chose to ignore them, pulling his hood up to just before his quiff was at its highest and threw the board down onto the ground. He stepped onto the board and pushed off quickly, taking a corner to see Luna and Celestia arguing on the street corner much to the amazement of everyone else gathered there. Peter watched them as he skated past, catching Luna's eye and glaring furiously at her.

"Kid, watch out!" a female onlooker yelled as Peter's board drifted onto the street as a large Range Rover came speeding towards him. His Spider-Sense activated and without even looking he used his adhesive powers to stick his board to his feet, leap high into the air and grin down the roof railings of the Range Rover, sparks flying from the trucks, before he landed easily on the ground, continuing to skate away.

"Peter!" Celestia called after him, moving away from her sister and going towards him.

"Ugh... fuck off" Peter growled under his breath, veering off into an alley. He grabbed his board and leaped high into the air, kick jumping off the walls in order to get to the top of the buildings and out of the sight of the public. He peeked his head over the edge of the building just in time to see Celestia look into the alley with a confused expression.

"Sorry Celly" Peter whispered "I'm not in the mood to put up with your cunt of a sister any more, besides, I've got better things to do"

A Fateful Mistake

"D-Dad?" Max asked, his young voice weak and frightened. The old man turned around, expecting to see his son only to be terrified at the sight of a glowing blue electric monster standing in front of him.

"What the fuck!?" he demanded, leaping back and holding his hands out in front of him "What the fuck are you?!"

"Dad its me, Max!" Max yelled, holding out a hand that shook with fear "Please calm down" The old man looked at Max for a long second, his eyes scanning every part of the blue creature's body before his jaw slowly dropped.

"Max... Max my boy... what the fuck happened to you?" he asked in terror "You're a freak"

"Don't say that Dad, I did this to help you, to help us get out of trouble" Max said in his defence, his voice shaking and breaking throughout the sentence.

"Help us?" his father demanded "How the fuck is this supposed to help us?!" Max shied away from his father's screams of rage, closing his eyes and trying to blot out the furious ranting from his father.

"You're a glowing fucking energy pylon you stupid fuck!" he bellowed "You're never gonna be able to live a normal life because of what you've done to yourself... why did you do this anyway!?"

"The Big Man said if I kill Spider-Man he'd get rid of your debts" Max whimpered "I'm only trying to help!"

"Help? Help!?" he screamed "I told you and your stupid fucking head that I had this covered, that we'd solve this another way, why didn't you listen to me?!"

"Because I knew you wouldn't be able to!" Max yelled. There was a second of silence as Max and his father looked at each other, tension and anger at an all time high before Max's father spoke.

"You listen here you little shit-" he began before Max interrupted him.

"No, you fucking listen, I am sick and tired of you pissing away all the money we have Dad, I love you to pieces and I always will, but you just can't help yourself, you're addicted to gambling and its ruining both of our lives, I can kill Spider-Man and the Big Man will forget about the money you owe him!" Max panted for a brief second, exhausted from his yelling, before continuing.

"Then we can get you more help, just like Mom always-"

"Don't you dare mention that cheating slut in my house again!" he screamed, charging at his son with open hands. As he got close Max could smell the liquor on his breath and he knew that his father was in another one of his drunk rages. He did as he always did in this scenario; he would grab hold of his Dad's arms and pull them together.

Only this time something else happened.

His father screamed in agony as the thousands of volts of electricity surged from Max's body into his father's, the energy frying his nerves and rupturing arteries. Max let go as soon as he realized what was happening but it was already too late. His father was too badly injured, too many things ruptured, fried or bleeding for him to even attempt to save him.

"Dad!?" he screamed as his father convulsed at his feet, the smell of boiling blood and burnt flesh assaulting Max's nose. The smoke in the room caused the fire alarm to go off which triggered the sprinkler system, large amounts of water cascading onto Max and soaking the floor. As a puddle formed around Max's father the electricity discharged from Max and into the water, continuing to electrocute the rapidly dying man. Max clapped his hands to his ears to block of the screams of his father, the sound of the statically charged water and the blaring fire alarms.

"Shut up, shut up, shut up!" he screamed, throwing out a hand at the sprinkler only to have a bolt of electricity blast from his palm and hit the sprinkler, causing it to explode and send more water pouring onto the floor. At this point the door to the room was kicked open and a group of nurses in blue ran in, staring at Max with fear before their eyes fell onto the dead body of the still-convulsing father.

"What the fuck!?" one of them screamed "Somebody call the police!"

"No... don't do that!" Max begged, holding out his hand again only for another bolt to fire, electrocuting the nurse, her screams adding to the unbearably loud noise in the room.

"No, fuck!" Max yelled, clapping his hands under his armpits and sprinting towards the window, throwing himself through the glass with a loud shattering sound and plummeting down into the city streets below as the agonizing noise finally left, only to have him be greeted by the pain of impact and then the peace of unconsciousness.

An Attempt at Reconciliation

"Are you sure he'll be here Harry?" Celestia asked, looking up at the old ship-building yard with a worried look in her eyes "This place is very dangerous"

"Yeah, this is the place the two of us would go to hang out whenever one of us had a rough day, we'd stop by a convenience store and pick up some candy, a few drinks and we'd bring something like a DS or PSP and play Pokemon or Yugioh games and just battle or duel each other until it was time to go home... I'm positive he's here" Harry's eyes scanned around the old building until he spotted Peter sitting in the rafters of the buildings with his board in one hand and his phone in another.

"Pete!" he called up to him. There was a long delay before Peter shouted back down to them.

"What?"

"We came to see if you're alright" Twilight responded.

"I already said that I'm fine" Peter sighed "I left so you guys could have fun again without me there to ruin it"

"C'mon Pete, just come down here and talk to us" Harry said, slowing down on the last few words. He looked around the wide room, seeing only loose chains and nothing more as a means to get to the area Peter was.

"Pete... how did you get up there?" Harry asked.

"Skated up the ramp, jumped at the last second and grabbed onto the girders" Peter said, pointing at the location where the ships would be built that Peter often used as a makeshift skate-pit.

"Then what?" Harry asked "The girder doesn't go all the way up there"

"Used the nuts and bolts in the walls to climb" Peter answered.

"Dude they have like an inch of finger space on them" Harry stated "There's no way you used those" Peter sighed loudly, stuffing his phone into his pocket and hooking one wheel of his board through a belt loop on his jeans before he lowered himself down to a hanging position on the girder.

"Jesus Peter, what the hell are you doing?!" Harry yelled.

"Coming down" Peter said coldly. He dropped down several feet, his fingertips grabbing hold of a loose ridge of the wall and his foot hitting against one of the bolts in the wall, the metal piece supporting his weight. Harry's hands clenched down by his sides as Peter shifted his weight to one hand, lowering his other to another piece of loose panelling before dropping all of his weight onto that one.

That was a mistake.

The panel made a loud tearing noise as it was torn away from the wall.

"Pete!" Harry hollered as he saw his friend throw himself away from the wall, his arm stretching out and grabbing hold of one of the chains hanging from the ceiling. He swung wildly for a brief second, coming close enough to the other side of the building to place his feet onto it before he used his centre of gravity to slow himself down until he simply hung from the chain.

"Well... that was exciting" Peter laughed, relaxing his grip and sliding down the twenty foot chain and into the pit, causing him to disappear from sight momentarily.

"Holy fuck man, never do that again" Harry said, his heart pounding in his chest.

"Are you OK Peter?" Celestia asked "Nothing sprained or snapped?"

"Nope-" Peter said as his hand slapped down onto the edge of the pit "I'm all good" He hoisted himself up and sat cross-legged on the edge of the pit with a grin on his face, taking his board off his belt and placing it next to him.

"What did you say you wanted?" he asked.

"We, uh, came to see if you were OK is all" Twilight shrugged.

"What happened to Luna and Cadance?" Peter asked, resting his elbows on his knees.

"They went home" Harry answered "Luna wanted to go right away and Cadance offered to drive her back"

"Fair enough, I'm kinda glad you didn't bring Luna along to be honest" Peter said, looking up at the roof.

"Peter, I know Luna can be hard to deal with but I'm sure the two of you will get along better as you get used to one another" Celestia said.

"That's not how friendship works Princess, you don't become friends when you get used to someone, you become friends when you like to be around someone" Peter said "You get used to the dumb habits and rituals they have, you don't get used to the fact that you don't like them"

"I'm sure if you just gave her a chance-" Celestia began only to have Peter cut her off.

"No Princess, I gave her a chance when we first met, I stuck out my hand in friendship and she spat in my face" Peter said irritably "I know I'm only fifteen and I don't know everything about myself but I know what I'm... no second chances, that's the kind of man I am, as far as I'm concerned its not through lack of trying that Luna and I don't get along"

"Peter, I understand where you're coming from but I'm afraid you're judging Luna based on a select few minutes together" Celestia said, a very unhappy look on her face "I'm positive that if you two simply sat down and talked to each other then you'd have a much better chance of getting along"

"I can sum up why that's not going to work in a sentence Princess: no amount of pushing, shoving or careful adjustment is going to make two jigsaw pieces that don't fit, go together" Celestia looked at Peter with bright purple eyes before lowering her head.

"If you're sure..." she sighed.

"Positive" Peter nodded "I apologize for what happened today at the cafe, I know that it was my fault, but the next time you all have Luna there, wherever you are, just make sure that I'm not"

Purposeful Alienation

Luna sat with a drink of scotch in her hand, leaning back in the chair she sat in with a drunken haze covering her eyes. The sun had long since gone down, nearly as fast as the contents of her scotch bottle, and she was still going over the day's events in her mind. The conference with the French ambassador, putting her signature down alongside her sister's and niece's to finally get the state government to recognize same-sex marriage in Kansas and finally the meeting at the cafe.

"Parker" she spat.

Just the use of the name left a funny taste in her mouth, gave her a conflicted feeling on how she should react to his presence and brought conflict inside her own mind about how she should feel about him. From her own personal experience with him, Parker was a very intelligent young man. He seemed to have an amazing grasp on the scientific functions of many theories and areas with a decent understanding of adult life, as good as a fifteen year old could have.

     She didn't see him as attractive, not yet at least, and she was willing to see how he blossomed in his later teen and early adult years. It wasn't impossible for her to understand why girls would see him as attractive though something she found particularly unattractive was his height.

"He's about... five seven?" she asked herself "I was about that height when I was eleven years old... though he would be the perfect height for a shorter girl like Twilight... how tall is she now? Five two? Five three?" There came a knock at the door, Luna's ears twitching at the sudden sound in the almost silent room, and the door swung open.

"Luna" Celestia said, flicking on the light and looking at her once again drunk sister.

"What?" Luna asked irritably, squinting to try and prevent the bright lights from damaging her retinas.

"I want to talk to you, about what happened today" she said quietly, walking into the room and taking a seat across from Luna. The eldest looked at the younger for a long second, analysing her sitting posture, facial expression and eye clarity before sitting up straight and speaking once more.

"What do you have against Peter?" she asked. Luna looked down at her lap for a moment, not willing to speak.

"Luna please, if you tell me what it is you don't like about him then maybe I can..." Celestia began, trailing off as a thought occurred to her "No, this isn't the way you usually act when you don't like someone"

"What are you talking about?" Luna hissed.

"I know you, we're both politicians, both leaders, we've been trained to fake emotions and reactions for longer than anyone else has been alive" Celestia continued "When you don't like someone, you usually keep it too yourself Luna, you act friendly around them but once they're gone, that's when you drop the pretence" Luna took another drink, finishing the glass and setting it down on the floor next to her.

"I still don't see your point, you're giving this speech about me pretending to like someone when I don't, yet I'm not pretending to like Parker at all" Luna said irritably "Are you just going to keep rambling or are you going to go somewhere with this?"

"My point is that when you don't like someone, you always pretend to be friendly around them, the only time you act like this is when someone has directly insulted you or-"

"And Parker hasn't insulted me?" Luna snapped angrily "The boy is disrespectful and air-headed!"

"But you were like this with him from the very beginning!" Celestia shot back "He hadn't said two words to you and you were ready to throw him to the wolves, now if you'd let me finish, I was going to say that you only ever act like this when someone directly insults you or when you don't want to give them, or yourself, the chance to become familiar and friendly with them" Luna gritted her teeth, her drunk stare locking onto a single fibre in the carpet as her temper flared up again.

"You don't have any idea what you're talking about" she growled.

"That's where you're wrong sister, I know you better than you think I do" Celestia said sternly, crossing her arms against her chest "You're not acting cold with Peter because you don't like him, you're doing it so you don't get the chance to like him, you want to push him away from you so you and he can never become friends... and it all relates back to him doesn't it?" Luna's eyes shot daggers at her sister, her breathing becoming heavy as her ears turned a shade of red, boiling with rage.

"I told you to never bring that up again" Luna snarled.

"But that's why isn't it?" Celestia asked, still pushing for answers "Because he reminds you too much of him, everything he does just brings back painful memories and whenever you look at him you can't help but feel sick"

"Leave me alone Celestia" Luna muttered.

"You have to get past this Luna, you can't spend the rest of your life feeling sorry for yourself" Celestia stated.

"Sorry for myself?" Luna asked furiously "You know that I'm entitled to feel sorry for myself, that bastard left me and ran off with someone else... I loved him"

"But he never felt the same, did he?" Celestia asked, moving over to her sister and placing a hand on her shoulder.

"He... he never knew" Luna mumbled, a lump forming in her throat "I never told him"

"And you've never let it go have you?"

"I can't... it eats away at me every time I look at Parker, the fact that the two are so alike... the fact that Parker is what I can never have" Luna said, a tear rolling down her cheek as she covered her face with her hands.

"Its OK Luna" Celestia whispered, wrapping her arms around her sister and holding her close "If that's what you really want then we can continue the research"

"No" Luna said, suddenly standing up and wiping the tears from her face "The time's passed, its too late for it and I've lost the want that I had once before, I need to forget about this and move on"

"Are you sure you can do that?" Celestia asked "Peter's going to be around a lot more, even though..."

"Even though what?" Luna asked.

"Even though... even though Peter said he doesn't want to be around you" Celestia sighed.

"See?" Luna said with a teary smile "I knew it would work"

"But it shouldn't have to Luna, I know you and Peter would be great friends if you just gave him a chance" Celestia spoke softly, placing a hand on her sister's shoulder again.

"I don't want to" Luna said with a shake of her head "I don't want to risk it ever happening again"

"If... if you're certain that's the best way" Celestia nodded.

"I am Celestia" Luna said "This is the best way"

"Alright then sister" Celestia said in a defeated tone "Good night"

"Good night Celestia" Luna said, smiling at Celestia as she left the room, leaving Luna on her own again.

As she felt she always was.

Photoshoot

"Uh, excuse me?" Peter asked the young woman with long raven hair chewing on the top of a pen. She looked at him with bright blue eyes and a kind smile.

"Hey there, how can I help you?" she asked.

"I, uh, I'm here to see Mr Jameson" Peter said "I'm trying to enter the competition for the best shots of Spider-Man that the Bugle's holding"

"Oh right, Mr Jameson's busy at the moment with another-" she said before the door opened, followed by an explosion of papers and a man in his thirties run out crying.

"And if you're not out of my office in the next fourteen point five seconds I'll have security tie your hands behind your back and force you to type out a three thousand word apology to me and every member of my staff for wasting my time!" the man with a flat-top haircut and moustache yelled furiously.

"Yeah, good going boss!" one of the employees shouted in support.

"Bobby!" the man yelled "Get to work on that three thousand word apology right now!"

"But sir, I was only trying to-"

"I don't wanna hear about what you were trying to do!" he barked "I only wanna hear your keys clicking as you try to convince me that your apology means something, and if you're not writing in the next eight seconds I'll throw you out of this office and get your wife to write that apology for me!"

"Sir, I'm not at my desk right now-"

"Somebody get the man a pen and a pad, he's got a six thousand word essay to write!" the man ordered, looking around the room impatiently.

"Sir, I thought it was three thousand?" he asked in a confused tone.

"Ah, my mistake Bobby" the man said, smiling at the employee before a furious scowl appeared on his face "This man's got a twelve thousand words essay to write!"

"Sir I-"

"Do you want more words?" he demanded.

"No sir!" Bobby yelped.

"Then get scrawlin' boy!" he boomed before turning to the young woman "Miss Brant, can you explain to me why my coffee isn't currently in my hand and being moved towards my mouth?"

"You haven't placed an order for one yet sir" she said.

"Then do that for me young lady" he said in a much calmer tone before getting loud again, looking at Peter "And what do you think you're doing here without my bagel Smith?!"

"What?" Peter asked in confusion.

"Don't you 'what' me boy, I ordered that bagel fifteen minutes ago and your company said it would be here in ten or less!" the man yelled, grabbing Peter by the collar and dragging him through the office towards the elevator.

"Sir, I don't work for the bagel company I'm here to-"

"Here to waste my time, why didn't I think of that?" he growled "Well here's my proposal, I want you out of my office, out of my building and out of my town!" Peter was roughly shoved into the elevator and the furious man punched the button for the lobby, the doors closing before Peter could even ask another question. He was silent for a brief second before a enraged and confused expression spread on his face.

"What the fuck just happened!?" he demanded.


"That guy is crazy" Spider-Man growled, swinging over the tops of smaller buildings in Midtown "He didn't even give me a chance to explain why I was there" He landed on top of a roof, looking down at the city below and being able to see his school, Midtown High, several hundred metres below him. A thought occurred to him, a stupid one, that he should have a look around to see what was happening. As he looked closer at the school he was able to see a large group of men, too old to be in school, wearing gang colours.

"Oh that can't be good" he sighed, leaping off the roof and webbing closer to the school courtyard. He landed out of sight and crawled on his front to the edge where he could see what was going on. One of the men dressed in dark purple had grabbed a kid by the shirt and was holding him in the air.

"Listen here you little shit, that kid you smacked earlier was my little brother" he snarled "You think you're a big man 'cause you can knock smaller kids around, we'll show how it feels when somebody bigger hits you around"

"It-it wasn't like that!" the teen exclaimed "He and his friends started the fight with me, I was only defending myself"

"Yo that's bullshit and you know it!" one of the other gangbangers yelled "Punch his teeth out C!"

"Who the hell do you think you are?" a teacher demanded, storming over to them "Get out of here before I call the cops!" The gangbangers looked at each other with wide grins on their faces, chuckling and smirking as the teacher took out his phone.

"I swear I'll call them if you don't put him down and get off this property" the teacher said. At this point one of the gangbangers reached behind him and pulled out a gun, pointing it at the teacher.

"And I swear old man that if you don't put that fucking phone down and fuck off I'm gonna blow your damn brains out" he growled, cocking the gun arrogantly.

"OK, this could work" Spider-Man whispered, taking his camera out of his backpack and setting it to take photos silently before webbing it to the roof at a good angle "Now I just need to stop them before this gets out of hand... or more out of hand than it already is" He silently moved from the roof and behind the gangbangers, the crowd of kids that had gathered around the event noticing him but staying silent.

"So what's it gonna be grandpa?" the gangbanger asked "Are you gonna drop the phone and fuck off or am I gonna have to make you drop it?"

"I've got a better question" Spider-Man said, sitting casually on one of the lunch benches. The gangbangers whirled around, the one with the gun aiming it at Spider-Man with a terrified look on his face.

"Aren't any of you guys embarrassed that you all showed up wearing the same outfit?" Spider-Man asked cockily "I mean, shorts and purple basketball jerseys aren't exactly Alexander McQueen levels of stylish but does it still not sting?"

"What the fuck are you doing here?!" the man with the gun demanded.

"Well I was just passing by" Spider-Man shrugged.

"And now?" he asked "What're you gonna do now?"

"Now? Well, now I'm going to feed you your teeth" he growled, cracking his knuckles and standing up straight.

"The fuck you are!" the man yelled, wildly firing the gun. Spider-Man was easily able to dodge the bullets while moving forward, using his webbing to yank the gun away from the shooter and web it to the ground where, covered over so that nobody could reach it. He leaped forward, spin-kicking one of the gangbangers in the side of the head and knocking him to the floor. He planted one hand on the floor as he landed, using his core strength and adhesive powers to keep balanced on his palm, before webbing another man over to him, slamming his knee into his gut before flipping over again and slamming his elbow into the back of his head.

"Honestly, dealing with you amateurs is starting to get a little boring" Spider-Man sighed "Its kinda like being able to juggle with one hand, its amazing fun at first and learning it can be great but once you've got it down it just loses its charm" He landed on his feet and leaped high into the air, webbing two of the other men as he went up and yanking them up with him. As they met in the air he slammed his feet down onto their heads ad knocked them out cold.

"And there goes the rest of them" he said in a bored tone, landing on the ground and webbing the unconscious gangbangers up before leaving his signature calling card "You can call the police now" Spider-Man stood up straight and looked at the crowd of kids, spotting Twilight standing at the front with an impatient look in her eyes. He noticed her make a gesture with her hand, the sign for a phone, before he nodded curtly and webbed back up to the roof, trying to make the fact he was retrieving his camera as discrete as possible.

"So Twilight wants me to call her?" he asked under his breath, front flipping off the roof and firing a web-line "I'll get right on that as soon as I go talk to that crazy guy at the Bugle again, this time with the pictures and a plan"

Date Required

"Sorry about that kid" Jameson said, holding the door open for Peter to walk into his office "I was expecting someone... you know, older"

"No worries, I know I don't look that impressive" Peter nodded "Thanks for letting me stay this time" Jameson took a seat at his desk and linked his fingers, looking at Peter with a curious expression.

"Alright then kid, show me what you've got" Jameson gestured with his hand. Peter took out his camera and prepared to show the photos before Jameson spoke up.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, what the hell is that?" he asked, pointing at the camera.

"Its my camera" Peter said slowly, missing the point.

"Yeah, I think I've got one of those too" Jameson said, snatching it away from Peter and examining it "I think it was my first camera back in nineteen seventy one"

"Alright, alright" Peter sighed "I know its not the most high-tech thing in existence but its the best I've got"

"Damn right its not high-tech... but I'll see what you've got on it" Jameson sighed, checking through the photos. Whatever he was expecting to see it wasn't what he saw, recoiling slightly in surprise.

"Wow" he whistled "Despite the fact they look like they were taken with a chocolate-smothered potato, these are pretty good" Jameson set the camera down, drumming his fingers on the desk in deep thought.

"I tell you what, I'll pay you for the photos this time but I won't use them" Jameson explained.

"Then what's the-"

"I'm not done yet" Jameson snapped "I'll give you the money but the first thing you buy is a new, better camera or else you're not getting the job here" Peter looked at Jameson with a blank expression before nodding his head.

"Yeah, I can do that" Peter nodded "What's the yearly salary like?"

"Well hold on there kid, you're too young to hire for a staff position, but I can still pay you for a few photos" Jameson added.

"Well, that's still good I guess, how much a photo?" Peter asked.

"Fifty is its used, twenty five if it isn't" Jameson said dryly.

"What!?" Peter exclaimed furiously "I could make more picking up shit at bus stations!"

"That's the offer kid, freelance or nothing" Jameson shrugged. Peter glared at the older man for a long second before a thought occurred to him, one that could get him more money.

"Or... I can just take the photos and sell them to another newspaper, I'm sure they'd pay more because they'd be making more money from increased sales thanks to my pictures of Spider-Man" Peter shrugged. Jameson's smirk dropped off his face as he glared at Peter who stood there with a smug grin.

"Name your price" Jameson growled.

"A hundred bucks a photo" he stated.

"Not a chance boy, seventy five is the highest I'll go!" Jameson snapped "You can take that offer or I'll take you and your crappy camera and hang you from the ceiling fan by the balls with it!" Peter stared angrily at the ground for a long moment, knowing that this was an ultimatum that Jameson was going to keep and that he couldn't haggle any higher.

"Fine, but you're still paying for the camera right?" Peter asked. Jameson slapped down a wad of money from his wallet and pointed to the door.

"Take the damn cash and get out of my office!" he barked "But if you're not back with more photos by the end of the day then so help me God I'll tie your laces together and tie you to a train track!" Peter blinked in surprise before taking the money and hurrying out of the office, closing the door quietly behind him.

"He's a handful isn't he?" Peter asked the secretary at the desk.

"That he is, but that's why we love him" she chuckled.

"I'm Peter Parker" Peter said, holding his hand out.

"Betty Brant" she said with a smile, shaking his hand softly "So will we be seeing you around here more often?"

"I should hope so" Peter nodded.

"We've got a girl your age that works a few floors down, only met her once or twice but she's a hard-working girl, training to be a reporter, her name was Martha-Jane or something like that" Betty said.

"Well, I hope I'll run into her sometime hen, see you around Miss Brant" Peter said, walking away after waving goodbye.

"See you round Pete" she smiled.


Peter landed softly in the alley where Twilight had told him on the phone to meet her.

"You're late" she said sternly.

"Sorry Mom" Peter said quickly, walking over to her "Are you gonna chew me out for not doing my homework and not cleaning my room while you're at it?" Twilight didn't answer, she instead held out a small golden envelope for Peter to take.

"So... you asked me to meet you in a secluded alley so you could give me a sealed package?" Peter asked "You're not training to be a dealer are you?" Twilight once again ignored the joke, turning her nose up and pushing the envelope closer to Peter.

"Celestia's invited you to a party next week" she said quickly "You need a suit and a date" Peter took the envelope and stuck it in his back pocket, his eyes softening as he looked at Twilight.

"What's the matter Twilight?" he asked her.

"Nothing, I'm fine" she said, lowering her eyes to the floor.

"No you're not" Peter said, reaching out to place a hand on her shoulder "There's something wrong" Twilight shied away from his touch and took a small step back.

"Seriously Twilight, what the hell's the matter with you?" he asked, beginning to worry.

"I don't wanna talk about it" she muttered.

"You'll feel better about it if you do" Peter said warmly "It always helps to get things off your chest"

"There's no point, it won't change anything" Twilight said "You won't listen to me"

"Oh... so its my fault?" Peter asked. Twilight suddenly whirled around, pressing a finger into Peter's chest and stepping closer to him.

"Yes, its your fault" she hissed "Its about that whore in a catsuit you're hanging around with"

"Black Cat?" Peter asked "Why does she matter?"

"Because she's a criminal, she's not good news" Twilight said, lowering her hand and turning away from Peter again "And she's not good enough for you..."

"Whoa, hold up Twilight" Peter said quickly, grabbing her shoulder and making her turn to face him again "The first two I can understand, but what does the third one have to do with anything?"

"I... I just don't like the fact you're hanging around with her" Twilight mumbled.

"Because you're jealous?" Peter asked.

"No I am not!" she snapped before lowering her voice again "Its just that I think you could use someone... someone more..."

"Someone more what?" Peter asked. Twilight curled her hand and pressed it against her chest, biting her lip as she stared at the ground.

"Someone more like..." she began before shaking her head.

"Spit it out Twilight" Peter said, staring at her in the eyes.

"Someone more like... me" she said, placing her soft hand to his cheek and leaning closer to him.

"Twilight..." Peter mumbled. Twilight's lips were less than an inch from Peter's before the sounds of blaring sirens caused her to jump in surprise, Peter reacting and clamping his hands onto her hips. Twilight stared out of the alley for a long second before her eyes fell back onto Peter's.

"I need to go Twilight, that sounded important" Peter said, nodding in the direction of the sirens.

"Y-Yeah" Twilight agreed, stepping away from Peter with her cheeks a bright red "Just... don't forget to bring a date for the party"

"Are you sure you can control yourself if I do?" Peter asked.

"Yes" Twilight nodded, moving a loose strand of her hair out of her bright eyes "Bye Peter"

"Yeah, see you around" Peter nodded, dropping his bag to the floor and removing his jacket and hoodie, removing his shirt and exposing his red and blue costume "Stay clear, it could be dangerous"

"Right" Twilight nodded, exiting the alley in a hurry with her hands stuffed into her cardigan pockets. Peter shook his head, releasing a shaky breath before continuing to change, wondering where the hell he was going to find a girl willing to a party with him in less than a week.

And how long he had before he wrapped his arms around Twilight and kissed her until the sun went down.

Yo Sparkles!

Spider-Man had been quickly trailing the huge number of squad cars that had been dispatched, accompanied by three SWAT cruisers and two choppers. He hadn't been able to see what they were going for but he was able to tell that they were going for something big. He effortlessly swung behind the cars, flipping and leaping freely in the air.

"What the hell is going on here right now?" Spider-Man asked, seeing that some kind of barrier had been set up just outside Times Square "Ooh fancy, looks like they've blocked access to advertisements... maybe I'm finally gonna fight the boss of this level in that big open area? I hope they give me a lot of ammo, I tend to spray n pray whenever I panic" Using a single web-line he attached himself to the bottom of one of the choppers and hung underneath it, allowing it to carry him into Times Square.

"So, is my Codex gonna tell me about the boss I'm gonna fight?" he asked mockingly "Or do I have to find four stones representing the four elements of the earth in order to get into the final resting place of the ancient king of the land?" As the chopper hovered over the area Spider-Man was able to see a large amount of SWAT members encircling a glowing blue object in the middle of the square.

"Whoa... I wasn't actually serious about the whole boss fight thing" Spider-Man said quietly "I better get a good look at this" He leaped down from the chopper and web-zipped onto a nearby building where he could see a crowd of people gathering outside the barriers to look at the police officers surrounding the strange object.

"What the hell is that thing?" he asked, leaping down to street level, landing on a street lamp and whistling to a nearby officer "Anybody gonna tell me what's going on?"

"Spider-Man?" the officer exclaimed "Great, if it wasn't a bad enough day dealing with one freak, here comes one who actually thinks he helps people"

"Yeah, try telling that to the rulers of our country that I saved, single-handedly I might add" Spider-Man countered "Now I'll ask again, what's going on?"

"Spider-Man?" a slightly reverberated voice asked.

"Yello?" he asked, looking at the blue object only to realize that it was a person made up of some kind of energy "What the hell? Are you alright?"

"It... it hurts" he whimpered. Spider-Man suddenly flashed back to the first time he encountered someone who looked like this, the electric man he'd fought with the other Avengers.

"Yo Sparkles!" Spider-Man called out to him "What's your name?"

"My name is... my name... Max" he said, holding his head and pressing it to the ground.

"I'm gonna go talk to him, alright, nobody do anything stupid" Spider-Man said, leaping down off the street lamp and walking over to Max.

"I don't take orders from you!" the officer snapped, only to be slapped round the back of the head by the officer next to him.

"I'd do as he says, we don't wanna piss this thing off and have an incident like last time do we?" the other officer asked.

"And why do we trust him?" the first officer asked angrily.

"He saved the princesses, he's earned my trust" he said, turning away from his fellow officer and returning his gaze to Spider-Man and Max. Spider-Man knelt down next to Max who was sobbing weakly, tracing a circle with his finger on the ground.

"You feeling OK buddy?" he asked.

"My... my job" he muttered, his words beginning to slur.

"Your job?" Spider-Man asked "What about your job?"

"Kill..." he whispered "Save Dad"

"Kill? Who do you have to kill?" Spider-Man asked.

"Kill... you!" Max roared, slamming a fist into Spider-Man's jaw. His strength wasn't anything superhuman but the voltage that coursed through Spider-Man caused him to seize up and cry out in pain. Max stood up and booted him in the chest, the muscle seizure making him unable to defend himself. The attack knocked him onto his back as he continued to twitch violently.

"Open fire!" an officer yelled followed by a swarm of assault rifle rounds. They punched through Max, spilling blue solution onto the ground that crackled loudly as his reverberated screams were almost deafening. As soon as his muscles relaxed Spider-Man rolled back onto his feet and threw himself away from Max.

"Stop it!" Max screamed, stamping his foot onto the pavement, the electricity being so hot that it began to dry out the concrete and make it brittle. The more he stamped his feet the closer and closer he came to the power lines under the concrete.

"Stop. Hurting. Max!" he roared, slamming his foot so far down into the ground that it connected with the power line, the lighting in the Square surging and flickering as Max seized violently.

"Max!" Spider-Man yelled, shooting two web-lines at him in order to pull him off the line "He's gonna blow!" The webs fried and brunt away before they even reached Max, leaving the only other option to kick him out of the way of the current.

"Sorry buddy, this is gonna hurt me a lot more than it hurts you!" Spider-Man yelled "Here I come Electro!" Spider-Man sprinted forward and drop-kicked Max in the chest, the rubber soles of his shoes being able to protect him for a brief second, until Max grabbed hold of Spider-Man's ankles, the electricity surging through him making him much more powerful.

"That hurt" he snarled, electrocuting Spider-Man, purposefully this time "Now I'm gonna hurt you!" He threw Spider-Man up into the air, firing a bolt of blue electricity at him. His Spider-Sense warned him about the incoming projectile and he was able to force his screaming muscles to angle him in a certain way to dodge the attack. He fired another web-line at a building and pulled himself over to it, landing softly but aching horribly.

"Max, c'mon man don't do this!" Spider-Man yelled.

"Don't you dare tell me what to do!" he roared "I'm sick of being told what to fucking do!" Spider-Man sprinted across the wall, barely dodging the bolts from Max as he fired them like a machine gun.

"Max please, you can stop this before somebody gets hurt!" Spider-Man grunted, throwing himself off the wall and attempting to get behind Max only to have the electric being simply adjust his features in order to look at him without turning around.

"What the hell man?" Spider-Man asked "Who did this to you?"

"Wouldn't you like to know" he laughed, charging a large bolt of electricity between his hands and firing it at Spider-Man. He threw himself to the side in a rapid and successful dodge and landed on his feet.

"This isn't working... I can't touch him without him zapping me" Spider-Man said, looking around "I need a plan"

"Where are you running to Spider-Man?!" Max bellowed "Max Dillon wants to finish what he started!"

"Max Dillon?" Spider-Man asked in a mocking laugh "That has got to be the shittest super-villain name I've ever heard!"

"Shut the fuck up!" Max hissed, firing another set of bolts at Spider-Man.

"Can you not come up with anything better?" Spider-Man jeered "Come on, not even something like the Electrifying Dillonator? The Statically Stupid Super-Villain?" Spider-Man dodged another bolt and kicked a table, still topped with food and drinks at Max. Max growled angrily, blasting the metal table but neglecting the food and drink, with a large coke hitting him in the face and spilling all over him. He growled angrily, his glow dimming slightly as the drink spilled down him and the electricity surging through the puddle it made.

"Of course... liquid, he's a living conductor" Spider-Man noted "If I can get enough water on him the electricity should all discharge into the water and drain him... or short him out at least" Spider-Man fired another web at Max, the burnt webbing hitting him in the face and angering him.

"Hey Sparkles, I bet you can't hit me with a bolt from there!" Spider-Man mocked.

"Oh yeah?" Max growled "Just stay right there!" Spider-Man flipped, cart-wheeled and skidded out of the way of each bolt until he was moving too far away for Max to hit him.

"Jesus man, you suck at this!" Spider-Man laughed "Did they not give you a crash course in 'How to not completely suck at shooting 101' before they turned out on your super-villain daily chores?"

"The Big Man may not have taught me how to use this, but I can still fry you anyway!" Max yelled furiously.

"The Big Man?" Spider-Man asked "You're working for the Big Man?"

"I don't work for anyone... Max Dillon doesn't work for anyone any more!" Max hissed.

"Ha! Max Dillon!" Spider-Man laughed "I still can't get over that"

"Shut the fuck up you prick!" Max said, throwing a large ball of energy that missed Spider-Man and stuck to a car, exploding brightly and sending the car flying. Spider-Man quickly used his webbing to catch the car and prevent it from crushing anyone before baiting Max to come closer to him, closer to the fire hydrant he was standing in front of. Max charged forward and swung a punch for Spider-Man only to have him lean to the side and kick the top off a fire hydrant, sending the spraying water straight into Max's face.

"In your face Electro, that's what you get for messing with the one and only Amazing Spider-Man!" he said, cheering himself loudly. Max growled loudly as the water was blasted into him, his electric energy being drained by the conductive nature of the water.

"No!" he yelled "This isn't going to beat me!" His eyes lit up a bright yellow colour, contrasting greatly to the blue, and he suddenly broke down into a bolt of electricity, surging through the air and into the exposed power line beneath the street and disappearing completely, leaving Spider-Man standing there sore, stressed and soaking.

"Well..." he said slowly "Does that mean I win, cause if no one disputes that then I'm totally counting this as a win"

Clashing Forces

"A date?" Peter asked, rubbing his sore shoulder as he threw the envelope down onto his bed "How the hell am I supposed to find a date?" The fight with Max had made the evening news that previous day and people were congratulating Spider-Man on a job well done. Peter had bought his new camera after the fight had gone down and tested it out in a few different areas in the city while trying to locate Max again.

   But now came the problem of finding someone to take to the party, a female who was interested in him, in just under a week. He began to run through the list of girls that didn't completely hate his guts and he said them out loud.

"Twilight..." he began, stopping after the first name "Oh this isn't going to be fun" As he was alone in the house he was wandering around in a pair of boxer shorts and nothing else, stopping in front of the mirror to check his injuries. He had several electric burn marks on his chest, wrists and ankles from where Max had grabbed him and his muscles ached from the shock treatment. He opened his wardrobe and took his costume out from where he had hidden it and examined the damage including several burns marks on the same places he'd been hurt.

"I have to fix this... but I can't afford to buy the stuff I need" Peter sighed. He threw the costume back into the wardrobe and walked over to his computer.

"I need to get back out there and get a few pictures for Jameson" he decided, a second passing before a thought occurred to him "And I forgot to ask Jameson to stop the whole smear campaign thing... and I need to ask him to keep my name of the photos I sell him, don't want to give anyone any hints about how I got them... and I need food" Deciding the last was more important he stood up and left his room, walking downstairs into the kitchen to see Black Widow standing with a mug of coffee in her hand, Peter's coffee mug. Peter froze in place and stared at the taller woman, eyeing her closely while she seemed unfazed by his presence.

"I know we're work colleagues and everything but I think you skipped a few steps in the whole 'hey buddy can I come over?' routine" Peter said quickly "You're supposed to ask first, wait for me to answer and wait outside before you come in" Widow took another sip from the mug, taking her time, before setting it down and speaking.

"Fury wants to talk to you" she stated.

"Is he here too?" Peter asked, looking around the room "He's not helping himself to some on demand TV by any chance is he?"

"He's at the Triskellion, waiting for you to suit up and see him" Widow answered.

"He doesn't call much does he?" Peter asked, folding his arms "Then again he doesn't do much either"

"He's done more for this country than you ever will" Widow said coldly.

"I'm not sure about that, I once won twenty dollars in third grade for my science project, I put that in the bank and I'm pretty sure it delayed the recession by a good few years" Peter said. Widow stared at him for a long second before looking down at the mug on the kitchen top.

"You like to talk, don't you?" she asked.

"Only when people listen" Peter shrugged.

"And if I told you I didn't want to listen?" Widow asked in response.

"Then I just start shouting" Peter grinned. Widow shook her head, pouring out the rest of the coffee into the sink and washing the cup out.

"Drying board" Peter said as she went to leave the cup in the sink.

"Don't tell me what to do" Widow sighed.

"Don't mess up and I wouldn't have to" Peter retorted "So why does Fury want to talk to me?"

"Its about the little scrape you had with that new super-villain in Times Square" Widow said "He wants a full brief on it"

"I get to brief Fury?" Peter asked with faux glee "Christmas has come early for sure"

"Yes, enjoy your juvenile behaviour" Widow said, rolling her eyes "I'll keep the mood serious for us both"

"See, I knew you were good for something" Peter said, giving her a slow clap "You make me so proud"

"Don't make me list all of my achievements to you kid, we'll be here a while" Widow said, placing the cup on the drying board and turning around again.

"Yeah but I bet one of those isn't saving your country from a recession is it?" Peter asked.

"You never did that" Widow growled.

"You can't prove I didn't" Peter said smugly "So for all intents and purposes, I'm a world hero"

"We're still in an economic crisis remember kid?" Widow asked.

"Even the great must fall eventually" Peter sighed, placing a hand on his chest and looking up at the ceiling with a fake teary expression. Widow looked at him for a moment before turning around and placing her hands to her face.

"Just get some clothes on, get your costume in a bag or something and hurry up before I shoot you in the face" Widow growled.

"Oh, I was having fun here" Peter sighed before nodding his head "Give me five minutes"

"You've got two" Widow said quickly.

"Geez, hard-ass" Peter growled as he headed up the stairs.


"He mentioned something about working for the Big Man" Peter said, having changed into his damaged costume but neglecting to put on the mask "And he looked like he'd been fucked up by the same stuff that other guy had at Oscorp"

"So... from what you're saying we can assume that Osborn and the Big Man are working together?" Fury asked, linking his fingers as he sat back in his chair "This could be very good or very bad for us"

"How so?" Peter asked, resting his head on his hand.

"The Big Man controls a lot of New York, almost all of it, and that includes the media and some of the police force" Fury explained "I get the feeling that the Big Man might cover up Mr Osborn as long as it suits his interests"

"Which are?" Peter asked.

"That's just the problem, we don't have any idea what the Big Man is really after" Fury shrugged "Some people have said that he's just a crime boss while others have said that he's a former Middle Eastern dictator looking to take America down from the inside"

"That's... that's quite a leap there Fury" Peter said, drumming his fingers on the table "And you're telling me that S.H.I.E.L.D can't use there hyper-advanced resources to dig up any dirt on the Big Man?"

"Kid, our satellites are able to track thousands of people's movements, read faces and recognize them with access to almost every form of identification on the planet ranging from passports to driver's licenses but you can't track the face of a master criminal if you don't have any idea what he looks like, sure we could put spies into play but we've seen how good that worked out for the police force" Fury explained, standing up and picking a tablet up from the table "At the end of the day, when our tech has no edge over the opponent and the only method we have left has already been tried and has failed several times there's nothing more we can really do"

"So you're saying you can't help?" Peter asked.

"Can't and won't" Fury nodded, reading through something on the tablet.

"Wait, what do you mean won't?" Peter asked in surprise "Your job is to help people"

"From threats that extend outside of normal humans limits, including aliens and inter-dimensional beings" Fury said.

"But you saved Princess Cadance, you sent the Avengers after her, with me along for the ride" peter growled, standing up and placing his hands on the desk.

"From an electric freak with a mental deficiency" Fury countered, raising his voice above Peter's "As I said, we deal with threats beyond normal human capabilities and that guy was about as far from normal as you can get"

"That's bullshit Fury, I thought you were supposed to be one of the good guys!?" Peter yelled.

"S.H.I.E.L.D are neither good nor bad Peter, we simply get the job done without all the faux political nonsense" Fury shrugged "Now sit down or I will be forced to detain you"

"Oh yeah?" Peter growled "And who exactly is gonna do that?"

And his question was answered sooner than he thought.

"Hold your tongue mortal or you shall be bound to that chair by your own organs" a powerful voice said from behind him. Peter froze in place as a cold metal weapon was placed against the back of his head "So swears Thor, Son of Odin"

"Thor, glad you could make it" Fury said with a nod "I was just telling Peter here about or rules and regulations, don't worry, he's gonna behave now, aren't you Peter?" Peter sat down with a disgruntled expression, crossing his arms and looking at Thor as he walked past.

"With all due respect Commander Fury, I somewhat agree with the child jester-"

"Hey!" Peter snapped.

"And I feel that we are somewhat responsible for the safety of this city" Thor said. Fury looked at the taller man for a second before placing his hand down on the desk.

"I respect your opinion Thor, and if you want to help out Peter then you can go right ahead, but just be aware that whatever you do will not be supported, endorsed or recognized by S.H.I.E.L.D in any manner"

"To be honest Fury, your support doesn't really count for much since the rest of the world doesn't know S.H.I.E.L.D doesn't exist, having a shadow force backing you is kinda like having... well, literally, your shadow backing you" Fury seemed willing to respond but an image flashed onto the desk of a S.H.I.E.L.D agent with a worried expression.

"Sir!" she said "Princess Luna has entered the Triskellion and is on her way up to the command centre!"

"She's not supposed to be here lieutenant" Fury sighed.

"I know sir but no one is able to stop her, she seems to want to talk to you" she explained.

"Alright, let her through" Fury sighed, ending the transmission before looking up at Peter "Get your mask on kid, we've got company" Fury turned to look at Thor with a joking smile on his face.

"And Thor, you stand there and look handsome" he grinned.

"As always Commander" Thor chuckled, striking a pose and pouting his lips.

"I'm so glad he developed a better sense of humour when he got here" Fury said, shaking his head with a grin. Peter pulled his mask onto his face several seconds before Luna pushed through the doors with several armed guards behind her.

"Fury!" she yelled angrily.

"Princess Luna" Fury said "Can I get you anything, a coffee maybe?"

"You can get me a damn situation report!" she barked, walking up to the table, seemingly ignorant to Spider-Man's presence for the moment "Where the hell were you and your team yesterday?"

"If I remember correctly we were at a water polo game with the X-Men" Fury said, his response getting a furious glare from Luna.

"That freak could've destroyed half the city!" she growled "And you and your Avengers were nobody to be seen, care to tell me why?!"

"Because we had our newest junior Avenger taking care of it" Fury said, gesturing to Spider-Man "I think he did a fine job if I'm brutally honest" Luna seemed to notice Spider-Man for the first time and an even more hate-filled look appeared on her face.

"What are you doing here?" she snarled.

"I came to inquire about a part-time job sweeping the floors and cleaning the computer monitors, these superhero suits aren't cheap you know" Spider-Man said "What about you? Because if you try to steal my job from me I'm afraid we're not going to be friends" Luna reached over to Spider-Man and grabbed hold of him by the throat, beginning to choke him as she lifted him up.

"Don't you dare try to be funny with me boy" she hissed "I'm not in the mood for your juvenile wise-cracks"

"Come on Princess... lighten up a bit" Spider-Man said in a strained voice "Jokes are good for everyone... they do say laughter is the best medicine"

"Luna, put him down" Fury said "He's too fragile for you to play with" Luna ignored Fury, instead tightening her grip around his throat, her teeth showing in a vicious snarl.

"You remind me too much of that red-clad fool Daredevil" she glowered "I hated him equally"

"Hey, I think I have much better fashion sense than Daredevil" Spider-Man coughed, beginning to lose feeling in his fingers.

"Luna!" Fury snapped. Luna looked back at him before sighing, easily throwing Spider-Man out of her grip and having him land heavily on his feet, rubbing his throat as he attempted to get his breath back.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" Spider-Man asked.

"I don't like vigilantes like you" she growled.

"I don't like peanut butter but that doesn't mean I go around smashing jars of the stuff in stores" Spider-Man said, standing up and glaring at Luna "You need to learn to control yourself more, you'll get more friends that way" Luna stared hatefully at Spider-Man for a long second before turning around at staring at Fury.

"And he's the one that's supposed to be in the Avengers?" she asked "He's more useless than Hawkeye!"

"Hey!" a gruff voice said from the doorway "I'm standing right here you know?" Fury turned to see a man in his thirties wearing a pair of jeans and a thick black sweater with grey eyes and light brown hair combed over to the right side of his head.

"Ah, Clint" Fury said "I was hoping you'd show up soon, has Bruce had a chance to talk to you yet?"

"No, I just got back from Siberia about an hour ago" Clint said with a shake of his head "What does he need?"

"Don't know, but he said that it was important" Fury shrugged "Go find him and then come back here"

"Boss, the Triskellion is like fifty floors, it'll take ages to find him" Clint sighed.

"Then get started or it'll take even longer" Fury said, gesturing for Clint to get going.

"Fine, whatever" Clint said, holding up his hands and leaving the room, muttering quietly. There was silence for a second before Luna spoke up.

"So what are you doing to try and find this new electric freak?" Luna asked.

"As of now, nothing" Fury shrugged "He's not our problem"

"I thought you said that it was your job to handle things that normal humans can't?" Peter asked.

"Ah, I mustn't have been clear enough, I meant situations and subjects that threaten national security, heads and leaders of government or S.H.I.E.L.D itself" Fury said "So if its just a regular super-powered menace we'll leave it to the local precinct, the Fantastic Four, the X-Men or any freelance superheroes like Spidey over there"

"So you're willing to risk millions of lives and billions of dollars in damages just because you're too lazy to do something about it yourself?" Luna asked in a disgusted tone.

"If that's how you see it then yes, that's exactly how we work" Fury nodded "Now if you'll excuse us, I've gotta find good ole Steve to get him to train Spidey for a few hours"

"You mean you're training him to be a better fighter?" Luna asked "What if he goes rogue?"

"Then we terminate him" Fury said "Simple as that"

"Thanks for making me feel safe guys" Spider-Man sighed, crossing his arms as he sat back down into his chair "Really appreciate it"

"Did we say you could talk?" Luna asked angrily.

"Seriously woman, what the fuck is your problem!?" Spider-Man asked, his patience with Luna having worn out "Did I do something to offend you or do you just like to be a cunt this time of day?"

Apparently Luna was sick of Spider-Man too.

Luna launched forward, slamming her boot into the chair, kicking it out from underneath Spider-Man just before he leaped high into the air, sticking to the ceiling and firing a web-line at Luna. She caught the web-line and yanked it towards her, attempting to tear Spider-Man from the ceiling only to have his adhesive abilities keep him on the roof. Thor moved to intervene only to have Fury place a hand on his shoulder, causing him to stop.

"Let them sort this out on their own" Fury said.

"But Commander-"

"That's an order Thor" Fury said sternly, causing Thor to stand down.

"You're gonna have to try harder than that!" Spider-man yelled at Luna. She gritted her teeth and pulled harder, causing certain parts of the ceiling to break off, bringing Spider-Man down with it.

"Oh fuck" he grunted. Luna swung a punch for him as he fell towards her but as her arm was extended fully he placed both of his palms on her knuckles, bending over her arm feet first and slamming his shoes into her face. Luna was knocked back by the attack but she didn't falter, grabbing hold of his legs as he attempted to jump off, pulling him down and closer to her.

"Get over here!" Luna yelled. Spider-Man landed on his hands, his arms bending under his back to catch himself but this was countered as Luna drove her knee forward, slamming it into his crotch. Spider-man roared in agony, his arms giving out and his head slamming into the ground only for Luna to lean forward and slam her fist into his jaw, landing two hits before he was able to place his feet on her stomach and push himself away.

"Holy hell... I think I just lost the ability to have kids" Spider-Man panted, rolling over backwards and getting to his feet, gingerly holding his genital area "And the ability to have kids"

"Is that it?" Luna growled "You done already?"

"Like hell Princess" he snarled, firing two more web-lines at her arms and yanking them downwards, trying to upset her balance and move in for a kick to the face. Instead what happened was that Luna was able to use her superior arm strength to yank him over to her again, wrapping the webs around her arms and as soon as he was close enough she slammed her forehead into his nose.

"Fwuck!" Spider-Man yelled, trying to leap back only to have Luna twist around, using the web-lines to flip him over her back and send him crashing into the floor "Ahhh..." As he lay on his back, his body pulsating with pain his Spider-Sense went off, warning him of the incoming boot to his face. He waited for a split second, waiting for Luna to lift her leg before he lunged forward, pulling Luna with him. Once back on his feet he threw her forward, slamming her into a wall while using the momentum to propel himself forward, catching Luna's head before she fell back, and slamming it into the wall twice before punching her as hard as he could, creating an enormous crack in the wall.

"Oooh, ouch" Fury cringed "That had to hurt" Luna growled angrily from her position in the wall, slamming her elbow into Spider-Man's ribs, making him flinch and release his hold on her head which allowed he to whirl around and punch him in the nose again. He gritted his teeth, ignoring the pain as he swung a right hook for Luna's cheek only to have her catch the bend of his elbow with her forearm and slam her other fist straight into his jaw.

"Get-" she growled, slamming her elbow into his collarbone.

"The-" a knee to the side of his thigh, causing his leg to go dead.

"Fuck-" another head butt to the nose

"Off-" a fist to the stomach causing him to hunch over.

"Me!" she yelled, cocking back her leg for a powerful kick. Spider-Man, enraged and in pain, seemed to unlock a second mode to his Spider-Sense, seeing the muscle movements and veins in Luna's leg and somehow knowing which muscle was going to be moved and where it was going to go. He was able to see the large sweeping kick coming before it did, leaning to the side as the high kick sailed past his shoulder.

"Not-" he grunted, grabbing her leg and forcing it straight up, pushing her into the wall

"A-" slamming his knee into her thigh, making her drop slightly from the muscle damage

"Chance!" he roared, slamming his fist into Luna's face and knocking her back into the wall. Luna's eyes flickered for a brief second before they erupted into a bright blue light.

"Oh no" Fury said "This is gonna go well for the kid" She forced her leg down with a reverberated yell, overpowering Spider-Man's single arm, throwing a punch that caught him in the jaw, whipping his head to the side and topping it off with a powerful tackle, placing both feet on the wall and driving them both to the ground. Spider-Man's head hit the ground, stars flashing in his vision as his new Spider-Sense mode cut out, leaving the original mode to warn him about Luna's attacks. She threw a wild punch for his face, Spider-Man jutting his head out to the side to dodge the punch, hearing Luna's knuckles crack the floor.

"Sir?" Thor asked worriedly.

"Give em a few more swings and then we'll stop them" Fury sighed "And I was enjoying this too" Luna pressed her forearm to Spider-Man throat and punched him once again in the face, her irises a deep, glowing blue with the whites of her eyes having become jet black, something in her mutated genetics bringing out a power that Spider-Man never knew she had. The punch caused another eruption of pain but it was quickly blocked out by the numb feeling that came about as Luna began to relentlessly hammer Spider-Man in the face with powerful punches, cracks appearing around his head as it was beat further and further down.

"Thor!" Fury snapped "Go!"

"Forgive me Princess!" Thor said, whirling Mjolnir around briefly before throwing it at Luna, the hammer slamming into her side and knocking her off Spider-Man. Luna landed on her side and rolled briefly, landing on her feet but dropping to one knee soon after. She remained still for a moment, panting from exhaustion before she raised a hand to her lip, wiping red blood from her lip and staring at it in shock. Her right cheek was red and stinging, her hair was frayed and falling down over her face and her blue lipstick had smudged during the encounter.

"So?" Fury asked "Feel better yet?" Luna stood up and straightened her jacket.

"Sort out the electric problem" she snarled "But send someone better than him" With that she stormed out of the room, leaving a very surprised group of on-lookers cowering in fear as she walked past. Fury walked up to Spider-Man who had pulled his mask up to his nose and was spitting blood onto the floor.

"I really, really hate her" he said as he looked up at Fury.

"I know kid, she feels the same" Fury chuckled, offering his hand for Spider-Man to take "Now get your ass down to the med-bay, see if we can save that pretty face of yours, after all, it is your only asset"

"Go fuck yourself Fury" Spider-Man growled, much to the amusement of Fury who helped the beaten teenager back up to his feet.

Miss Wonderful Personality

"Dude, that fucking sucks" Harry said down the phone as Peter tied his tie properly "I think you're gonna be one of the few people there without a date" Peter knew that saying all too well. The week had passed quickly, his injuries from the fight with the Ice Queen, his new nickname for Luna, and he'd made a few decent pay checks from his work at the Bugle, enough for his Aunt to focus on other things rather than how she was going to pay that month's bills.

"I really don't wanna walk in the place without a date but I can't stand everybody up, especially when they've invited me personally" peter said, realizing at this point he never asked what the party was for.

"Its kind of an aspiring minds kinda thing, there's gonna be a bunch of rich scientists, business CEOs and investors gathered around and waving their money to see who has the biggest stack" Harry explained after Peter had asked him.

"So what the fuck am I going there for?" he asked in annoyance "I'm just some broke kid from Queens who struggles to pay for the water bill"

"I know, but Twilight's not exactly Tony Stark's next big competitor in terms of money and technology you know?" Harry asked.

"Oh yeah, how could I forget that Twilight and her family aren't billionaires, I mean they're only millionaires dude and that makes me feel so much better" Peter growled "So I'm going to a party for rich bitches in a room rented by the ruler of the fucking country with guests who will probably have amazing trophy wives and then there's me; some bum kid showing up with the only achievement to his name being that he holds the record for being the most unpopular kid in Midtown High"

"Jesus fucking Christ Peter, can you be any more angry at yourself?" Harry asked in amazement.

"I can fucking try" Peter hissed before sighing loudly "Alright man, I've gotta go... I'll see you when I get there"

"Don't keep the driver I sent for you waiting, Aleks gets bored easily" Harry reminded.

"Right sorry, I forget you're very protective of your billions of dollars and want to make sure they're well spent" Peter muttered.

"Peter... shut up" Harry laughed before he ended the call. Peter stuffed his phone inside his suit pocket, feeling anxiety and inadequacy welling up in his chest, once again considering whether or not he should just abandon the party and come up with excuse about work coming up or something.

"No... I can't just not go" Peter sighed.

"You're right, especially when you've got a date coming over" May said from his doorway. Peter flinched slightly, his aunt catching him off guard but confusion took over briefly.

"What do you mean 'date'?" Peter asked "I never got a date"

"Well... lets just say I took control of the situation and found you one" May said with a smug look.

"You found one? You didn't hire a hooker did you?" Peter asked in terror.

"Jesus Peter, of course I didn't" May said sternly "Remember that girl I told you about? My friend Anna's niece?" Peter was confused for a second before he remembered what his aunt was talking about.

"You don't mean Miss Wonderful Personality do you?" Peter asked, the fear evident in his voice.

"Yes, Mary-Jane Watson" May nodded "And she's a lovely girl Peter, you should be lucky I could get her to go with you"

"Yeah... alright" Peter sighed, his heart being crushed within seconds "I guess that's better than nothing" There came a knock at the door and Peter felt a shiver run down his spine, dreading the thought that it could be Miss Wonderful Personality.

"That should be her now" May said, moving out of the way of the door "Go on, go answer it" Peter nodded solemnly, taking a deep breath as he left his bedroom and walked down the stairs. He placed a trembling hand on the door handle before swinging it open, laying eyes on the horror he was sure to be in front of him.

"You must be-" he said in a forced polite tone before his eyes landed on her. Standing at the door was a beautiful girl with cherry red hair and emerald eyes, red lipstick and a well-fitting black dress. Her hair was styled and thick with her completely covering dress only adding to her beauty, the fabric clinging tightly to her curvy body and the long sleeves coming down in an arrow over the back of her hands with a small loop to hook over her finger and keep it in place. The dress went down to her ankles, a cut in the side of it that gave her legs a wider range of movement with black high heels on her feet, making her stand at the same height as Peter.

"Uhhh..." Peter said dumbly, his mind completely derailed by the beauty of the girl in front of him.

"Ahhh, you must be Peter Parker?" she asked in a smooth voice.

"Yeah" Peter nodded, regaining his composure quickly and giving her a charming smile "You must be Mary-Jane Watson... I gotta say, you look amazing"

"Face it Tiger" she chuckled, placing a finger to her cheek and smirking "You just hit the jackpot"


"One more and I win" Harry said, glaring furiously at Shining as the two of them were locked into a raging battle of Tiddlywinks "And that thirty bucks is mine"

"In your dreams kid" Shining growled, aiming another shot for the empty bowl. On the other side of the table sat Twilight and Cadance, Twilight wearing a shorter, dark purple dress with her hair moussed up and styled in a wavy pattern, falling down to her chest while Cadance wore a sleek, tighter pink dress with two cuts in the sides that exposed her legs and rose-styled sleeves that showed her arms through the net material. The pink-themed princess had styled her fringe over her right eye with a large ponytail raising from the top-back of her head.

"Why are we in relationships with these two again?" Cadance asked, sipping from her wine glass.

"I have no idea" Twilight shrugged "I expected to be able to mature Harry after a few weeks"

"I've been trying to mature Shining for eight years now, it hasn't gone as well as I wanted it to" Cadance sighed "I still love him to pieces though"

"I guess" Twilight nodded, taking a sip from her own wine glass.

"You really shouldn't be drinking that" Cadance said.

"Are you gonna stop me?" Twilight asked.

"No, feel free to get as fucked up as you want, I'm not your mother" Cadance shrugged as she downed the rest of her wine "I really didn't expect tonight to be as boring as it is, its just a bunch of old pricks throwing money and achievements around, the only one I like in here is Tony and he's busy nailing the wife of the stock broker in the bathroom"

"It does suck... I'm just wondering when Peter's going to get here" Twilight.

"Ugh" came Luna's disgusted voice from behind them.

"Oh come on, you're not still mad at him are you?" Cadance asked her aunt.

"Yes, I am" Luna hissed, walking over to them and standing in front of the table. She herself was wearing an open-top blue dress that exposed the top of her cleavage with long sleeves and a looser fit than most of the women in the room that had a similar figure to Luna's. She had thickened up her own hair and had to thick strands resting on her front with the rest tied up at the back, much like Cadance's. She held a glass of brandy in her hand and sipped quickly from it.

"Then just try not to get into an argument with him this time, I don't wanna have to drive you home again" Cadance sighed "I'm already bored to tears and I don't wanna put up with hateful bullshit"

"Where is he anyway?" Twilight asked "He was supposed to be here about ten minutes ago"

"Yes!" Harry exclaimed, sticking his middle finger up at Shining and swiping the money off the table "In your face!"

"I think he sometimes forgets he's a multi-billionaire" Twilight said in a disappointed tone. Harry paraded around in victory for a brief second before his eyes landed on something that made his face drop a mile.

"No. Fucking. Way" he said in disbelief.

"What?" Shining asked, following Harry's line of sight until he found what he was freaking out about "Son of a bitch" The girls were equally confused at what was going on and they turned around to see Peter having walked into the room, handing his invitation to the doorman and walking over to them.

"Who is that?" Cadance asked as she saw the red-head Peter had his arm linked with. Twilight's eyes locked onto the green-eyed beauty and she felt the spark of jealousy light a fire in her stomach accompanied by an irrational hatred for whoever Peter had brought with him.

"Hey guys" Peter said, waving at everybody and receiving a cold stare from Luna in return "This is Mary-Jane Watson"

"Wow, its an honour to meet you all" Mary-Jane said with a drop-dead gorgeous smile "I didn't know Tiger here had such important friends"

"Tiger?" Twilight thought "I hate her. I fucking hate her"

"Tiger?" Cadance asked with a grin "Where'd that nickname come from?"

"Because he is one, strong, sharp-looking, a treat to look at and, in today's modern world, a very rare sight indeed" Mary-Jane chuckled, looking at Peter with a smile.

"Thanks Mary-Jane" Peter chuckled "I don't feel like I can come up with a description as good as that for you"

"And why is that?" Mary-Jane asked playfully.

"Because you're indescribable" Peter grinned.

"Stop it, you're making me blush Tiger" she giggled.

"I hate you and everything you stand for Watson" Twilight thought, trying her best to not burn a hole through Mary-Jane as she looked at her.

"So, Miss Watson" Cadance said, moving aside to let her have a seat next to her.

"Please, call me MJ" Mary-Jane requested.

"Alright then MJ, what's your backstory?" Cadance asked.

"Well, I live in Queens with my Aunt right now, not far away from Peter's in fact, and I've just started to attend Midtown High this week" she explained "I've gotta say princess its an honour to finally meet you, I've been a really big fan of yours ever since I was eight years old"

"Awww, thank you" Cadance said with a happy smile.

"To be honest, you're kinda like my role model, I just loved the way you set yourself up in the fashion world and showed everyone else that you could be successful without your aunt's help" Mary-Jane continued "Its... its kinda my dream to be able to do what you do someday"

"You want to be a fashion designer?" Cadance asked.

"Not exactly, I wanna become a model, or something like that" Mary-Jane explained "My Aunt says that I have a bright future if I utilize my talents without exploiting them" Cadance was silent for a second before she seemed to get an idea.

"Now that you mention it, I have been thinking about starting a new fashion line for younger girls, your age and below, and I haven't really been able to find any teenage models that fit the bill" Cadance said "If you're willing to try I'd ask you to drop by my studio sometime so we can see how you work"

"Are... are you serious?" Mary-Jane asked with a bright smile on her face "I'd love to! Thank you so much Princess!"

"Please, call me Cadance" Cadance smiled.

"Oh, okay" Mary-Jane grinned "So when should I stop by?"

"Hang on, I'll grab a pen and paper and write a few details down for you, do you mind coming down to reception with me?" Cadance asked.

"Not at all" Mary-Jane nodded, standing up and following after Cadance, turning back to Peter with an excited grin on her face. Peter chuckled to himself before he sat down next to Harry, both he and Shining looking at him with amazement.

"What?" he asked after a few seconds of silence.

"Where the hell did you find her?" Harry asked, still not willing to believe what he had seen.

"Do you remember that girl my Aunt May told me about? Miss Wonderful Personality?" Peter asked.

"Bullshit is that her" Harry snapped "Not a chance"

"Yup, that's her alright" Peter grinned "Aunt May asked her if she wanted to come with me and she said yes, to be honest with you I wasn't expecting her to look like she does"

"I know, she's like the hottest girl I've ever seen in my life" Harry exclaimed. This response got an angry scoff from Twilight who got out of her seat and stormed away into the crowd of people.

"~Oooh" Peter and Shining cooed, laughing as they saw Twilight walk away.

"You just fucked up big time" Peter laughed.

"You better go apologize to her dude" Shining grinned "Or else you're gonna be in the dog house for months"

"Twilight!" Harry called "I didn't mean it like that" Harry hurried after Twilight, also disappearing into the crowd, leaving Shining, Luna and Peter sitting there quietly.

"Right, I'm gonna get a few drinks, either of you want one?" Shining offered as he stood up.

"Sure, can you get a Pepsi or something?" Peter asked "Please?"

"Sure thing, what about you Luna?" Shining asked.

"No thank you" Luna said, leaning against a support column and turning her eyes away from Peter, much to his annoyance.

"Right then, I'll be back in a minute" Shining said, making his way over to the drinks table. Peter caught Luna shoot a glance his way and he decided to try and break the ice, remembering not to show his anger towards he for the encounter they had while he was in costume.

"So, what've you got planned for the rest of the evening?" Peter asked the Ice Queen. Luna finished her drink quickly and mumbled and excuse about needing to go somewhere else, ignoring the question and walking towards the balcony. Peter gritted his teeth angrily, infuriated that his attempt to try and make peace had been completely shot down and she outright refused to even attempt to find common ground.

"No, I'm not having you make this awkward again" Peter growled, standing up and following after her. When he reached the balcony he found that it was surprisingly empty and that only he and Luna had gone out to it, either that or Luna's presence had scared everybody else off. He stopped behind her as she looked over the edge of the balcony and he folded his arms.

"What is your problem?" he asked her. The taller princess froze for a second before turning around and glaring at him.

"I thought I told you to leave me alone?" she asked angrily.

"No, you made some bullshit excuse to ignore me and walk away" Peter corrected "What the hell did I do to make you hate me so much?"

"That's none of your business" Luna growled.

"I figure it is seeing as how it has something to do with me and the reason why you hate me so much" Peter said "I think I deserve to know" Luna gritted her teeth and leaned closer to Peter.

"You don't deserve to know anything boy, you're lucky I let Celestia invite you to this little party of ours" Luna hissed, her face inches away from his "So if I were you, I'd turn around and get out of my sight"

"And what the hell makes you think you can control me?" Peter challenged.

"I'm the ruler of this country, I own you" Luna snarled.

"And don't I feel special?" Peter asked mockingly "I'm getting pretty sick and tired of you acting like this, I'm trying my best to get along with you and you're just outright refusing to try and find any common ground, so what gives? Why do you hate me?" Luna's anger remained strong for a second before her face dropped, the hateful glint in her eyes dying down and being replaced by a sad haze.

"I... I don't hate you" Luna sighed, her shoulders dropping "Not as a person"

"What exactly do you mean by that?" Peter asked.

"Its... its not you as a person that makes me mad... its not even you as a concept" Luna said, setting her drink down on the balcony and placing a hand to her face "C... Can we just drop this?"

"I can't easily drop something when I have no idea what I'm holding" Peter said. He kept a stern expression until he noticed the weakened look on Luna's face.

"What's the matter?" Peter asked "You were alright just a mintue ago"

"Please... just drop it" Luna said in a begging tone.

"Look, if I've said something that offends you I'm sorry, its just that I'm trying to-"

He was cut off by Luna, but not in the way he expected to be.

Luna grabbed hold of the sides of his face and pulled him towards her, her frosty-coloured lips pressing against his, a tear running down her cheek as she tried to put as much passion into a few seconds as she could. She then pulled back, looked at him with watery eyes and slapped him across the face, her sadness turning into anger again.

"That's for running away with her" she snapped, storming away angrily seeming out of her mind. Peter stood there in complete silence for a long second, a ticking clock in his head counting down to a reaction.

"What the fuck just happened?"

Enter Electro

Luna threw her now empty glass against the wall, tears rolling down her face as a slew of unwanted memories came flooding back to her.

R&L, Oscorp Medical Labs, Non-Functioning Equipment, Time-Withered Body, R&M and their runaway

She closed her eyes and tried to steady her breathing, her hands tightly clenching her shoulders with her fingernails digging into her skin. Her make-up had began to run down her face as the cold tears refused to stop. Haunting sounds of laughter, glasses connecting, church bells and screams pushed out from her subconscious and began to drive her insane. The heartache, the feeling of embracing another and the warmth of love mixed and battled with the cold feeling of being alone, the rage of being abandoned and the heart-swelling feeling of love that sent every part of her mind and heart into a frenzy.

"Stop it..." she whimpered "Please... stop it..."

Luna felt herself slip into unconsciousness but before she slept she allowed one, hateful word to slip from her mouth. A single name. A name that brought forth more hate than any other could.

"Mary"


Peter remained standing at the balcony, hearing Shining talk to him as he walked up behind him, presumably holding drinks.

"There you are dude, what happened?" he asked as he handed the drink to Peter "You and Luna both disappeared by the time I got back"

"Yeah, sorry about that" peter said, hiding his previous emotions from Shining as he took the drink with a smile "We had a bit of an argument and she left, she wasn't very happy"

"She hasn't been lately, we're not sure why" Shining sighed "We've tried talking to her but I don't think we're getting through to her"

"What's she been doing?" Peter asked "She hasn't been having any, like, mood swings or anything has she?"

"That's... very specific Pete, why mood swings as a specific?" Shining asked with a cocked eyebrow.

"No reason, I just thought that that was a common thing with girls" Peter said, taking a sip from his drink. Shining appeared ready to say something but his attention was attracted by something behind Peter.

"Whoa, what the hell's going on there?" he asked. Peter turned around and saw what he was talking about, a constant fluctuating light over at the power grid for the city with a barely audible static noise going through the air.

"Max?" Peter thought to himself, now happy he'd decided to put his costume on underneath his party suit.

"Hang on Peter, I'm gonna go make a few calls" Shining said, setting his drink down on the balcony and heading back inside, pulling his phone out as he did so. Peter waited until Shining was clear and nobody was looking out onto the balcony before putting his own drink down and leaping over the edge, falling down and shooting a web-line to the nearest building.


"Twilight, are you gonna act like this all night?" Harry asked his angry girlfriend.

"I don't know, why don't you go ask MJ?" she snapped.

"Come on Twi, don't be like that" Harry sighed "Do you want me to get you a drink?" Twilight didn't answer but Harry got up and went for one anyway. Twilight stared down at the ground angrily for a long moment before she heard somebody else sat down next to her. She looked up, expecting it to be Cadance, but was horrified to see Mary-Jane sitting down beside her.

"Hey there, its Twilight right?" she asked "I'm Mary-Jane Watson"

"Yeah, I know that" Twilight said in a salty tone.

"Oh, I recognize that kind of reaction" she said with a smile "Its about a guy isn't it?"

"No... its none of your business" Twilight said coldly.

"I'll take that as a yes" she chuckled "Look girlfriend, if you've got a stake in for somebody I'll back off and let you have it, just give me the word" Twilight hesitated but slowly looked up at Mary-Jane, seeing a kind, gentle and friendly smile on her face.

"Its... its not that I've got a stake in for him, I've already got a boyfriend, its just that..." Twilight began, unable to find the correct words.

"Its just that you're very protective of your male friends" Mary-Jane finished "And that friend would be Peter, wouldn't it?"

"M-Maybe" Twilight said. Mary-Jane laughed quietly and placed a hand on Twilight's shoulder.

"Look, I know you think that I'm just some red-headed bimbo whose going to sweep in and steal your friend away but don't worry, I'm not going to" Mary-Jane explained "As of right now I'm not looking for a boyfriend, even somebody as great as Peter... you don't mind me saying that do you?"

"No, not at all" Twilight nodded "After all, he's not my boyfriend" Mary-Jane was quiet for a second before she smirked.

"Do I detect a hint of longing in your voice their Miss Twilight?" Mary-Jane questioned.

"No, not at all"  Twilight said quickly.

"Don't worry, your secret's safe with me sister" Mary-Jane nodded "But if I were in your shoes I'm sure I'd feel the same, torn between two choices that you wish would be just one"

"W-What d'you mean?" Twilight asked.

"Well its easy to see really, both of them have great qualities that any girl would love for her man to have but neither of them has even one of the others, which is what makes it hard to make a final choice. Harry has the money and the authority, he's got billions of dollars and fancy things in his future, something that every girl dreams of having in their life. Peter has the looks and attitude that a girl wants in a man, strong, confident and knows how and when to laugh at himself. Harry's rich and powerful while Peter's charming and funny, you want them both but you know you can't" Mary-Jane explained "You know if you try to have both of them, the price afterwards will be much larger than the benefits, so you remain unsure, wanting what the second offers but not wanting to lose what the first one's got"

"MJ, can I ask you a question?" Twilight asked.

"Shoot" Mary-Jane nodded.

"How are you able to read my mind?" Twilight asked with a grin.

"Its more obvious than you think... at least for a woman to see, men are much different creatures" Mary-Jane chuckled "Men are simpler, for better or for worse, and they don't take much training to be able to handle, I just feel sorry for them when it comes to figuring out how we work as a gender"

"I don't think Harry's very good at it" Twilight sighed.

"Neither does Peter, but he's not as bad as some" Mary-Jane smirked "He's got a little game but he's hardly a trained expert"

"You can say that again" Twilight laughed, looking up at the red-head again "You know something MJ, you're quite fun to talk to"

"You too Twilight" Mary-Jane nodded "I think we'll get along just fine"

"I hope so, you seem to understand me much better than I do" Twilight joked "You'll be handy to keep around"

"We all have our uses girlfriend, some better than others" Mary-Jane said, looking around the room for a second "Speaking of Peter, where did he get to?"

"I... I have no idea" Twilight said, having a hunch as to where he went but not wanting to vocalize it to Mary-Jane "I'll go outside and call him in a minute, after Harry gets back with the drink he went for"

"Good plan" Mary-Jane nodded.


Spider-Man landed quietly on the building next to the power plant, scoping out the area for any sign of Max. Finding none he opened a window and crawled inside the building, feeling a tense knot in his stomach form as his anxiety grew.

"Alright Spider, stay calm" he whispered "We just need to see if Max is in here and if he is we stop him, call the police and get out quicker than a-" His sentence was cut off as his Spider-Sense began to ring, warning him of an incoming attack. He threw himself down to the ground with a loud grunt, the now yellow lightning bolts chasing after him as he moved.

"Spider-Man!" Max yelled "I was hoping to run into you again, I believe we've got a score to settle?"

"Yeah, something like one nil to me if my memory's working" Spider-man said, web-zipping onto another wall and bolt after bolt was shot at him "Now are you gonna come along quietly Maxy or are you gonna make me work for my two nil victory?"

"I'm gonna make you fry web-head!" Max boomed, charging up another bolt and firing it at Spider-Man, missing again.

"Wow Max, your aim's almost as bad as your banter and your name!" Spider-Man laughed, using his webbing to grab a barrel that he swung into Max, knocking him off the ledge he stood on and into the air. Spider-Man leaped forward, slamming his foot into Max's stomach, being able to hit him without fear of electrocution due to the lack of grounding he had. He dropped down to the ground, booting Max in the back just before he hit the floor and sending him flying into one of the generators.

"Yeah... about the name" Max snarled as he stood up "I'm changing it, what was it you called me again?"

"Sparkles?" Spider-Man asked.

"No... Electro wasn't it?" he asked, standing up and rolling his neck "I'm Electro, bitch!" He pressed his hands together and fired a yellow stream of electricity at Spider-Man who dodged to the side, webbing up to the ceiling and just barely outrunning Electro's beam.

"Electro bitch?" Spider-Man asked "Are you sure you don't want me to call you The Pink-Man instead?"

"W-What?" Electro asked in confusion.

"Yeah... I think that joke would've worked better if you'd seen Breaking Bad" Spider-Man said, both of them stopping and remaining still, Spider-Man sticking upside down to the ceiling "Then again, I haven't seen it either... so... yeah"

"W-What are you... just stand still and fucking die!" Electro hollered, firing at Spider-Man yet again. Spider-Man attempted the same trick with the barrel but Electro saw it coming and was able to vaporize the barrel.

"Whoa!" Spider-Man exclaimed "If you can destroy the barrel that easily then why aren't you just burning everything I can stand on, keep me on your level?"

"That is... a great idea web-head, thanks!" Electro grinned, increasing the power of his beam once more.

"Oh that's a great move Spidey!" Spider-Man groaned, throwing himself down to a lower section of the wall and slapping a palm to his head "Why don't you just tell him your secret identity while you're at it? After all, you've just given him a better way to kill you!"

"You talk way to fucking much man" Electro snarled "Its annoying"

"Yeah I know, you're not the first person to tell me that" Spider-Man nodded, scratching his chin "And somehow I get the feeling you won't be the last" The two continued to fight, Electro continuing to blast the walls and the ceiling, leaving very artistic-looking patterns in the walls.

"Huh, you know this would make a lovely postcard" he said, looking at the burn marks "I should take a picture of-" He slapped his hand to his face and groaned, remembering that he had forgotten his camera and wouldn't be able to take pictures.

"Argh, I could make a killing off this fight" he growled "Oh well... next time for sure" Electro fired another charged bolt at him, hitting one of the girders in the walls and the whole room began to shake.

"Be careful Max, you're gonna bring this whole place down on our heads!" Spider-Man yelled.

"That sounds like a plan!" Electro grinned, firing more and more charged bolts at the support beams he had exposed.

"Maybe I should just, like, shut up for the rest of my life" Spider-Man sighed, leaping at Electro and trying to kick him in the face as a desperate effort to not destroy the entire place. His feet were less than a metre away from Electro's face but he pointed his arm out and blasted Spider-man in the chest, sending him flying through a wall and into some kind of office.

"Great... there's another five bucks wasted on suit repairs... owww" he groaned. He got to his feet and prepared to leap out of the room before his eyes landed on a rack of strange looking gloves. He looked at the sign above them and saw that they were specialized non-conductive gloves.

"Oh, now that's almost too good to be true" Spider-Man said, grabbing two of the gloves and pulling them over his hands "And now that I've got the dungeon item I can beat the boss, get the Pendant of Courage, collect a heart container and pull the Master Sword from its pedestal in the Lost Woods" He realized that with the area the gloves covered he would be unable to use his web-shooters so he had to sacrifice one of the gloves in favour of webbing ability, and then leaping back into the room with Electro.

"Alright Electro, get ready to..." he said confidently before realizing that Electro was nowhere to be seen and that his only company was a small army of police officers aiming weapons at him.

"Freeze Spider-Man!" one of them yelled.

"Did you guys see where Electro went?" he asked, only to receive the sounds of weapons priming in response "No? Okay then" He threw himself forward, web-zipping out of a hole in the roof and giving chase after Electro. He threw the glove away and made his way deeper into the city.

"I need to find this son of a bitch" Spider-Man growled, now being pursued by a news and police chopper.

"Stop right there Spider-Man, you're under arrest!" the man in the chopper yelled down a megaphone.

"Can't. Busy!" he yelled in response "Looking for my friend, he gets scared when he's out alone, you'll know him when you see him, he's got an electric personality!"

"He is not getting away this time... get snipers on every roof in the fucking city of you have to, I want him caught and I want him alive!" the man yelled down a radio.

"Yeah, good luck with that pal" Spider-Man chuckled. As he was swinging he was able to see a large amount of squad and SWAT cars chasing him on the streets, a smug smile underneath his mask as he knew that they would never catch him. His attention was gained however as his Spider-Sense began to weakly buzz, wanting him to look down.

"Huh?" Is Electro nearby?" he asked himself. For a split second his Spider-Sense blasted but it was far too late to react, a sharp object punctured his leg and he immediately felt his muscles give way. He released the web-line in the lowest point in his swing and he was thrown through the air, slamming through a small office building's lower floor window, out of the other side and smashing into a yellow taxi cab.

"No... get up web-head!" he thought as he heard the sirens get closer to him "No no no no" He tried his hardest to move, put everything he had into it but it was no use, his body wouldn't listen to him. He felt a hand grab hold of the back of his costume before he was dragged off the cab and thrown to the floor, squad cars pulling up with SWAT teams exiting their APCs, all weapons, cameras and eyes were on him as he was pulled onto his back side, had his hands bound behind him and his mask pulled off his head.

"Now then Spider-Freak, let's see who you really are..." the officer said, placing his hand under Peter's chin and trying to force him to look up.

Secrets Revealed

Peter locked his head into position as best as he could, trying to keep it low and in shadow.

"Just stop fucking struggling already, there's no way in hell you're getting out of-"

Peter felt the power return to his muscles and he tore the handcuffs away from his back, bringing his arms round and slamming his hands into the face of the police officer, using his webbing to cover his eyes and slamming his fist into his face. Peter darted forward, flipping over another one of the police officer before dropping low and sweeping his legs out from underneath him, following up with two web-lines to the heads of other police officers and yanking them together, knocking them both out.

"Stop right there freak!" one of them bellowed, aiming a shotgun at him and preparing to pull the trigger. Peter fired another web at the weapon, yanking it away from him before striding forwards and swinging it into the police officer's face, breaking his jaw and knocking him out. he then snapped the shotgun in half and threw one of the pieces at a nearby street light to cover himself in darkness once again. He sprinted forwards and front flipped over one of the stopped police cars and booted two officers in the face on the way down, rolling quickly and dropping into a rapid crawl forwards, scuttling under a car before pouncing over a SWAT APC, landing easily and tackling another police officer.

"Just gotta get out of here..." he said, knowing that his mask was lost as he saw someone in SWAT armour pick it up and disappear from sight "Fuck!" He skidded under another APC and made a quick turn, swinging around on a street light to throw off pursuers as the whole thing was caught by a news chopper.

"C'mon Spidey" he grunted, launching off the street light and over two patrol cars, rolling sideways and disappearing into an alley. He leaped up as high as he could and pressed himself into a gap in two roofs, hiding himself from view. He saw police officers look into the alley, scanning it with eyes and flash lights before moving on. Peter remained still for nearly five minutes until he was positive that nobody else was nearby, both the news and police choppers were no longer audible and he allowed himself to breathe a sigh of relief.

"Nice job Parker... now if I could've just kept the fucking mask..." he breathed, dropping down silently into the street and wiping his hands on his legs. His victory was short-lived as he felt the muzzle of a gun being placed against the back of his head with a heavy breath behind him.

"Don't. Fucking. Move" they panted, the voice sounding very familiar. Peter held up his hands in surrender and knew that it was over, he'd been caught and he was going to prison.

"Turn around. Slowly" the voice ordered.

"Buddy, can't you just look the other way this one time?" Peter asked, still using his fake New York mobster accent "It'll help a lot more people letting me go then it would arresting me"

"Turn around now" he repeated, pushing the gun harder against Peter's head. Peter screwed up his face and slowly began to turn around, his face being revealed to the police officer dressed in riot gear.

"Alright... you got me" Peter sighed.

Peter?" the man asked in disbelief "Shit..." He reached up to his head and took the helmet off, followed by the face mask he wore, revealing the familiar blue hair and strong face of Shining Armour.

"Shining?" Peter asked "Oh thank fuck... you gotta let me go man"

"Peter, you know I can't do that" Shining said "It'll cost me my job" The two of them looked at each other with distressed expressions before Peter came up with an idea.

"How are you as an actor?" he asked suddenly.

"What?" Shining asked in response.

"Can you fake a story?" Peter said quickly.

"Peter I'm not going to lie about this" Shining said.

"Then don't, I'll hit you now and get away and you can say that was what happened" Peter explained "Just give me back my mask and we can-"

"I can't give you your mask back Peter, my guys saw me pick it up... and I can't walk away with an facial injury because that would mean that I got a look at you..." Shining sighed "Fuck, man"

"Then just let me go and you can give me the mask back later, alright?" Peter asked.

"Peter... I can't, I'm gonna have to-" Peter lashed out his hand and webbed Shining's gun away from him, throwing it aside before leaping up to the top of the nearby building and sprinting away.

"Mother fucker!" Shining yelled, angry yet glad Peter had been able to get away like that. Shining put his own gear back on, retrieved his gun and tore the webbing off it before throwing the webbing into a nearby trash can, the mask of Spider-Man still in his pocket.

"This should be fun to explain" Shining said, grabbing his radio and beginning to give out a sit-rep.


Shining had neglected to remove his riot gear, bar the helmet and having pulled the face mask down, and as such he received several strange looks as he walked through the party and over to Celestia.

"Princess!" he called, pushing through the group she was talking to. He noticed Twilight, Harry, Cadance and Mary-Jane standing around, discussing amongst themselves and they all turned to look at him.

"What's the matter Shining?" Celestia asked, lowering the drink she was about to sip from.

"I've got something you might want to take a look at" he said.

"And that is?" Celestia queried as Shining reached behind him and pulled out the mask. Shining noticed Twilight visibly flinch as he held the mask out in front of him but he decided to confront her on it later.

"Good God, they finally got that costumed freak!" someone exclaimed happily.

"What are you talking about?" another one asked "This is terrible, Spider-Man was a hero!"

"Anyway, how do we know that's the real mask and not some Vietnamese replica bought on Ebay?" a third asked.

"Because we pulled it off the web-swinging son of a bitch ourselves and the expression 'does whatever a spider can' applies to him perfectly, he wriggled free and scurried away faster than any of us could catch him" Shining said to the crowd as well as Celestia "Spider-Man is still at large but is missing his crucial costume piece, so we should all keep an eye out in future for a mask-less superhero swinging around the city"

Confrontation

Peter straightened his tie as he ducked through the crowd, trying his best to keep his head down and remain unnoticed as he reintegrated himself into the party.

"Alright Parker, you just need to get to the other side of the ballroom and establish an alibi for where you went" Peter thought to himself "easy, right?" Peter managed another step before his Spider-Sense went off and a palm struck him lightly in the side of the head, causing him to swing sideways before a hand grabbed hold of his shoulder and the aggressor forced him to cut through the crowd.

"Nice move back there Parker" Shining growled angrily "I might have to take a few lessons from the Brilliant Bible of Bullshit Escape Routines" Peter blinked before looking over his shoulder at the much taller man.

"That is an amazing title" he stated "Do you mind if I steal that?"

"I have no idea how I never noticed how alike you two are" Shining said, steering Peter out of the ballroom and into an empty corridor, smiling at the doorman as he shoved Peter out.

"Is there a problem Shining?" the deep-voiced doorman asked.

"Not much Rico, just have to teach the kid a thing or two about eyeing up my wife" Shining grinned.

"Huh, give him a slap for me" Rico smirked, nodding and turning back to his job. Shining dragged Peter out to a second balcony in an unused ballroom before slamming the door behind him.

"What the fuck are you trying to do kid?" Shining growled furiously. Peter spun around and straightened his suit

"Apparently I'm trying to do your wife" Peter snapped "You just made me look like an asshole right there Shining"

"If you don't start answering my questions I'm gonna make you look like a Parker-shaped smear on the fucking pavement forty floors below us" Shining hissed, reaching behind him and pulling out the mask again "Are you trying to get yourself killed, are you trying to make yourself the most wanted man in New York?" Peter opened his mouth to answer, holding out a hand before growling angrily, splaying his hand out and turning away from Shining.

"I don't know what I'm doing" he hissed "I had some stupid fifteen year old idea, put more thought into it than I should've and now I'm having the time of my fucking life!"

"You are not serious, you could get yourself killed doing this" Shining stated "You could die, cripple yourself or get thrown in jail... where would that leave your Aunt May?"

"Hey, this is helping us both out in the long run" Peter snarled, pointing at Shining angrily.

"Oh really?" he asked "How?"

"The photos I'm taking for the Bugle of Spider-Man... of me, the owner's paying me for them and I'm using the money to help pay the bills at home" Peter explained.

"So that makes it okay does it?" Shining demanded "Help the poor by taking narcissistic pictures of yourself and beat up a few bad guys? That makes perverting the course of justice legal in your books does it?"

"Perverting? I'm doing a good job out there!" Peter snapped, tensing his hands down by his sides and turning away from Shining.

"A good job? You're wasting police time by making sloppy work out of the procedures and orders we do ourselves" Shining commented.

"Well have you ever considered that I'm doing something the police can't?" Peter asked.

"Something the police can't huh? Do you think we just sit on our cars, eating doughnuts and sticking our thumbs up our asses?" Shining demanded angrily, grabbing hold of Peter by the scruff of the neck and pushing him against the balcony "Take a good look down at that city Parker and understand that one man in a fucking unitard isn't going to make much difference, this place is bigger than you and its bigger than me, if you feel like you can help people then join the police force or join the Avengers, or the X-Men or even the fucking Fantastic Four, I don't know" Peter tore himself away from Shining's grip and stared furiously at him.

"I'm not just gonna-" Peter began

"But if you think for a fucking second that I'm going to let some freelance punk in a mask beat up every third drug dealer and claim that its for the greater good then you've got another thing coming!" Shining finished.

"Then why did you let me help you before?" Peter demanded "Before you knew who was behind the mask you were more than happy to let some freelance punk fight crime" Shining's anger simmered down briefly as he put a hand to his face, breathing quietly before speaking again.

"I did it because I didn't have any personal stake in your life... now I know who you are, who you know and who you hang out with... I feel like its my responsibility to keep you alive... and if I have to arrest you and throw you into the slammer to do it I'm more than happy to" Shining explained.

"What the fuck are you talking about?! The people I know?" Peter yelled "What do they have to do with anything?"

"You're one of my sister's best friends, if you bite the bullet then she's not going to be happy, and I know I'm not too personal with your Aunt May but I feel like it'll be my responsibility to explain to her what happens when you get killed doing this" Shining stated.

"If, not when Shining, and since you're so happy to accept me as your responsibility then you're gonna have to accept that the mask, the costume and the name is my responsibility" Peter growled "My father personally believed that if someone has the ability to perform a good action then that person had a moral obligation to do that thing... with great power, comes great responsibility Shining"

"Parker, listen-"

"No you listen, when I put on that mask, hell, when I made that costume I accepted that I could die at any time wearing it and I'm more than willing to do it" Peter continued "I knew a man who threw his life on the line to stop a man that I never did, that I could've so easily, and that choice killed him... I vowed to never let that happen to anyone else as long as I had the power to do it... I am Spider-Man Shining, and I don't give a fuck whether you like it or not" Shining stared furiously at Peter for a long second, his eyes glancing down at the mask he held in his hand before shoving it into Peter's chest.

"If you're so eager to throw your life away in a fight that's not even yours, then go ahead" Shining snarled, opening the door but remaining still for a brief second "Just don't expect me to mourn you when you're gone Peter"

"Yeah, the feeling's mutual pal" Peter spat, shoving the mask into his pants pocket and crossing his arms, seething with anger as he leaned against the railing of the balcony.

Heart to Heart

Shining sat with his radio in his hand, giving his best read of an excuse he'd come up with.

"Yeah Boss... about the mask" he sighed "Its gone"

"What the hell do you mean its gone?" Glover demanded on the other end of the radio "You had it in your pocket!"

"No sir, I had it in the strap of my body armour, somewhere it could've fallen out of or been grabbed by someone looking for a good hit on Ebay"

"And you're sure you don't know where its gone?" Glover asked dryly.

"Positive, its gone and I have no idea where it went" Shining confirmed "Sorry"

"Alright, okay, well if its gone for good then there's nothing we can do about it" Glover growled "Just don't screw up like this again"

"Yeah, sure thing boss" Shining nodded, rubbing his face and reattaching his radio to his belt, looking around the room before his eyes landed on Twilight. He moved over to her, politely excusing his way through the crowd, before tapping her on the shoulder. She whirled around in surprise before breathing a sigh of relief upon realizing it was her brother.

"Oh, hey there Shining, what's up?2 she asked. Shining gave her a stern glance before pointing a finger towards the door.

"We need to talk" he said.

"Can it wait, MJ and I are talking" Twilight said with a sheepish grin.

"Outside. Now" Shining ordered.

"Sheesh, hard ass" Twilight sighed "See you later MJ"

"Alright girl" MJ nodded, picking up her drink and scanning the crowd, wondering where Harry had run off to "Jesus, our boys just don't wanna be around us do they?" Twilight laughed, following her brother out of the room and to the balcony where Shining and Peter had been several minutes earlier, Peter now somewhere else.

"Right... so what did you want to talk about?" Twilight asked. Shining looked out over the city for a long second, drumming two fingers on the metal railing before asking a question.

"When did you find out Peter was Spider-Man?" he asked bluntly. Twilight's face froze for a second, forcing herself to try and keep a natural look before slipping into confusion.

"What are you talking about?" she asked with a fake laugh "That's ridiculous"

"Look Twilight, I'm not really in the mood to mess around here, so if you can just give me an answer, the real answer, as to when he told you then that would be great" Shining said. Twilight was silent for a brief second, her eyes locked onto the cityscape before she looked back at her brother.

"Shining, I haven't got a clue why you're asking me this, Peter isn't-"

"About fifty five minutes ago, an officer of the NYPD unmasked the vigilante Spider-Man in full view of the city, but the little bastard scampered away, keeping his face low and covered, and he managed to escape sight" Shining explained quickly "I was lucky enough to catch him in an alley where he turned around, at gunpoint, and showed me that it was indeed Peter Parker, now he never told me that you knew who he really was but your reaction back there was more than enough to put it together Twilight... so I'll ask you again, when did he tell you?"

"He... he didn't tell me" Twilight caved "I figured it out"

"Huh, well done" Shining nodded "How did you?"

"Well, he kept acting the same in and out of costume, using the same sense of humour and voice... that was a dead give away to me, and the fact he left signed notes that I was able to match to the letters he'd written to me before we left Chicago" Twilight explained "I managed to draw him out and unmask him"

"Really?" Shining asked in a surprised tone "How did you manage that?"

"I... uh... femininity?" Twilight offered. An unhappy look appeared on Shining's face as he crossed his arms and raised an eyebrow.

"What sort of femininity?" he asked.

"It, uh, it doesn't matter" Twilight said quickly, her cheeks flushing red "Just that it worked"

"No, you're telling me how it happened" Shining instructed "And if you don't then I'm going to-"

"Shining?" Cadance's voice asked from the doorway. The two of them looked to see the tall woman standing with a drink in her hand and a confused look on her face.

"What're you doing out here?" she asked.

"I was just explaining to Twilight here about how sometimes guys are idiots and that they say the wrong things, in regards to Harry's compliment of MJ, and that she shouldn't be mad at him for the whole night" Shining said quickly, giving a believable answer. Cadance shrugged her shoulders before turning to Twilight.

"You do realize that your date is looking everywhere for you in there don't you?" she asked "He thinks that you've left him"

"Oh Christ, can I go now before he throws himself out of a window?" Twilight asked Shining.

"Fine, fine, go ahead" Shining said, turning to his wife and smiling "Thanks for telling her" Twilight smiled at Cadance as she walked past and the older woman returned the gesture before turning to her husband.

"Are you getting bored yet?" she asked.

"Are you?" Shining responded.

"Very" Cadance nodded "Luna already ran out a while ago, Celestia's trying her best to not throw Justin Hammer out of the window because of his stupidity and I'm falling asleep trying to fend off the rich bastards who all want me to go home with them"

"Do you want me to kick the hell out of them?" Shining asked.

"Very much, but I would prefer it if we could go home early?" Cadance asked "Just you and me?"

"Were... were you originally planning to bring a third person home?" Shining asked.

"What?" Cadance asked in confusion.

"You said 'you and me' as if it was different from usual, like when a girl says 'just you and me' go to the mall, or the beach... or am I misinterpreting that and it was originally an invitation?" Shining asked.

"What the hell are you talking about?" Cadance asked.

"Was that an invitation?" Shining asked, wanting clarification.

"Yes Shining, yes it was" Cadance nodded, putting a hand to her face and sighing "You know, its a bad sign when you don't notice that I'm trying to seduce you"

"I've told you before, I'm as dumb as a bag of hammers, if you want something don't hint at it, just tell me" Shining shrugged.

"Okay fine, You. Me. Home. Sex" Cadance said, pointing a finger at an imaginary word in the air as she said it "Is that better?" Shining was silent for a long second, holding up a finger with a confused look before speaking.

"So, just you and me right?" he asked.

"Just shut up and follow me" Cadance said, grabbing hold of his body armour and dragging him back into the ballroom.

"I still got it" Shining grinned.


"Peter!" Mary-Jane exclaimed, waving at the teenage boy as he stormed back through the party "Over here!" Peter nodded at her and walked over, sitting down next to her and placing a hand to his forehead with an angry glare directed at the undeserving floor.

"Whoa, what's the matter Tiger?" Mary-Jane asked.

"Nothing" Peter said quickly, falling silent again. Mary-Jane took a sip of her drink, looking away from the teen. Peter glanced at her from the corner of his eye before sighing and sitting up straight.

"Look MJ, I'm sorry about that" Peter apologized "I'm just a little stressed out is all"

"Anything you care to share?" Mary-Jane asked.

"Yeah, sure" Peter nodded "If you... hypothetically of course, you had taken a job that put yourself at risk, a job that somebody else was doing already, but you felt that you could do it better, would you be in the wrong for doing it?" Mary-Jane looked at Peter with a raised eyebrow, setting down her drink and tapping her chin with a red nail.

"I don't know really... if somebody else was already doing it then you might not be needed, and its debatable whether you actually do it better or if you just think you do... but I'm guessing that's not what you wanted me to say is it?" Mary-Jane asked.

"No, not really" Peter chuckled "I want to know if you think that person was doing the wrong thing"

"Well it depends, if you feel like its a job you can do and do it as safely as possible then I figure you can't be wrong on that front, but if you're doing somebody else's job... do they want you to do it in the first place?" Mary-Jane pondered before asking for specifics.

"Not the people already doing it but the people you're doing it for do" Peter answered "They want me to do it for them but I'm competing with a more official group of people who don't want me to"

"So what's the majority vote?" Mary-Jane asked "The original workers or the people asking you to do it?"

"The people asking" Peter replied.

"Well then take a Utilitarian outlook on the whole thing, the greatest pleasure for the greatest number right?" Mary-Jane offered "If you think you can make a bigger group of people happy then go ahead and do it"

"You think so?" Peter asked.

"I would say that's the best thing... but what about the whole 'risk' factor to it?" Mary-Jane questioned "What's the exact risk?"

"I could die" Peter said bluntly. Mary-Jane nearly choked on her drink as he spoke, swallowing it quickly before looking at him with wide green eyes.

"Holy hell Tiger, that changes the game a little doesn't it?" she asked "In that case you should stop doing whatever the hell it is right now... wait, what are you even doing to begin with?"

"Its kind of a long story, but my Aunt and I live on our own after my Uncle died and we're not the most well-off family, we need money to pay the bills, and I've found a way to do it" Peter began.

"Its... its not illegal, whatever you're doing, is it?" she asked in a worried tone.

"No, its legal" Peter chuckled "I'm a photographer for the Daily Bugle and my job's to take pictures of Spider-Man in action, and him in action isn't usually as easy as a neighbourhood watchman's photos or a fire fighter, I need to get close to the bad guys he fights, close enough to take the pictures but at the same time close enough to be in trouble if I get spotted" Mary-Jane was silent for a second before she exhaled loudly.

"I really don't know Petey, I think that if you've got no other way of getting money for your family then you've gotta do what you've gotta do" she shrugged "I think you're the only one who can make a concrete decision with this because I think you'll get different answers from different people, its your life and you need to make whatever choice you think is right" Peter looked down at the floor again for a long second, taking her words into account and once again weighing up the decision he'd had to face;

Was the Man more important than the Mask?

"Alright MJ... thanks for your help" Peter said.

"So, do you know what you're gonna do?" she asked.

"For now, yeah, but I'm not sure if its the right choice" Peter sighed.

"Who knows?" Mary-Jane asked "I think you'll figure it out sooner or later"

Last Dance

"I am so sorry that I've not been able to speak to any of you tonight" Celestia said apologetically, sat at the table where Twilight, Harry, Peter and Mary-Jane were sitting, many of the guests having left during the evening and leaving the group to each other since the main party had quietened down.

"That's alright Princess, you've been busy dealing with other people" Twilight nodded "Its just great that you can talk to us now"

"Yeah, being the ruler of a country and having to deal with so many drunken rich idiots has to take up time" Harry nodded "We can't blame you for taking care of more important stuff"

"Please, I view connecting with my people as more important than a few pleasantries and meetings" Celestia smiled beautifully "How have you enjoyed your night?"

"Its been amazing" Mary-Jane said, slightly nervous about talking to the Princess "I really can't believe how nice you guys are"

"Well I think its been great meeting you Ms. Watson, you seem like a lovely girl" Celestia nodded.

"Yeah, Ms Wonderful Personality" Harry grinned, elbowing his friend in the arm.

"What?" Mary-Jane asked "Who came up with that?"

"My Aunt did, before we met tonight she described you as a wonderful personality and it kind of gave us a few nightmarish thoughts" Peter explained.

"Right" Mary-Jane nodded "And I've gotten rid of those misconceptions now, right?"

"Oh yeah" Peter nodded with a grin, placing his arms on the table and resting his chin on them "You're so much cooler than I thought you'd be"

"Hmmm, I try" Mary-Jane said with a sweet smile.

"So what have we all got planned for tomorrow then?" Celestia asked "A lie in I presume?" A chorus of affirmatives came in from the gathered crowd before the music started to change to a much slower, wind-down kind of tune. Twilight's eyes lit up as she slapped Harry on the arm with a smile on her face.

"Do you wanna dance?" she asked happily "I love dancing!"

"That sounds fun... but, uh..." Harry said sheepishly.

"But what?" Peter asked in a jeering tone "You mean the amazing Mr Osborn never learned to dance at a young age?"

"Shut it Parker" Harry snapped.

"Harry, I am disappointed in you" Celestia said, crossing her arms over her chest and leaning back in her chair "I thought your father would've taught you everything from the two-step to the fox-trot with the ladies man he used to be"

"Playa!" Peter said mockingly, throwing up a gang sign.

"Shut it" Harry barked "You're hardly one to talk about not being able to dance"

"Is that true Peter?" Celestia asked "Can you not dance either?"

"I don't mean to blow my own horn but I was educated in the ways of rhythm and dance" Peter grinned "My Aunt May said that I had to learn if I wanted to be able to get a nice woman to like me"

"And look how well that went" Harry sneered jokingly.

"Shut it" Peter responded with a grin.

"So Tiger, do you think you're up for one dance before the evening's out?" Mary-Jane asked.

"Of course Ms. Watson" Peter smiled, holding out his hand before his phone began to blare the Imperial March theme from Star Wars.

"Huh, who's that for?" Twilight asked.

"That's my boss" Peter sighed, taking his phone out of his pocket and answering it "Hello?"

"Parker!" Jonah bellowed from the other end into Peter's ear, loud enough to make him recoil in pain. An alarmed expression appeared on everybody's faces as the bellowing could easily be heard.

"Yes Boss?" Peter asked, rubbing his ear with a grimace.

"Where are you?" he demanded.

"I'm at a party" Peter answered.

"Well if you want to keep your job you're gonna tell me that you're on Broadway taking pictures of that electric maniac for your supper!" Jonah roared "So Parker, where are you?!"

"I'm on Broadway taking pictures of that electric maniac for my supper" Peter sighed, standing up and straightening his suit.

"Damn right you are, now, remember our deal?" Jonah asked.

"Money for photos, less money for bad shots" Peter nodded.

"Good, now hurry up and get here before the Bugle closes for the day" Jonah ordered.

"But sir... its eleven at night... why are you still open now?" Peter asked.

"I'm not paying you to ask questions boy, just go now and get me photos of that freak!" Jonah screamed before the call ended. Peter stared at his phone for a long second before putting it back in his pocket and turning to look at the others.

"Sorry guys, if I wanna eat this week I've gotta go to work" Peter said, turning to Mary-Jane "Listen MJ, I'm sorry about having to bail out like this but-"

"Its alright Petey, I'll wait for you to get back" Mary-Jane chuckled "But you better give me the best dance I've ever had"

"If that's what you want" Peter grinned "Sorry guys, I'll be back soon" Peter ducked out of the room and disappeared from sight, leaving his group of friends to sit and talk amongst each other.

"Peter's boss sounds like a nice guy" Twilight said sarcastically.

"Yeah, like Hitler was a nice guy, right?" Harry asked.

"You know I actually met Hitler once?" Celestia asked.

Nobody really knew how to respond to that sentence.


Spider-Man landed on the roof of an empty building and took out his camera, setting it to a wider lens and webbing it to the highest point of the building that was still able to get the shots. He had gone back to the power plant and retrieved one of the non-conductive gloves on the way to get his camera from Queens.

"Well... Jonah wasn't lying" Spider-Man said, seeing Electro blowing up cars at the end of the street with several police officers firing on him. Using his free web-shooter he swung over to where Electro was and tried to end the battle early, releasing the web and plummeting downwards, slamming his fist into the back of Electro's head and knocking him to the floor.

"Touchdown!" Spider-Man yelled, standing up and making a Y pose only to have his Spider-Sense go off. He threw himself high up into the air, turning around and attempting to web Electro in the face, the villain now back on his feet and blasting him. The web once again disintegrated and Spider-Man fell downwards, being unable to web-zip away fast enough and Electro fired a bolt at him, aimed for his chest.

"Nuh uh Electro, not gonna work this time!" Spider-Man grinned, catching the blast with his gloved hand before landing "What're you gonna do now?" Electro didn't answer, instead he threw himself at Spider-Man only to be upper-cutted in the jaw by Spider-Man's gloved hand.

"Is there something wrong Maximillion?" he asked mockingly "You seem a little out of it now? What's wrong? Do you need a jump-start?"

"I'm gonna kill you" Electro groaned.

"Trust me buddy, I haven't even begun to annoy you yet, the night is young and so is my sense of humour!" Spider-Man exclaimed happily, turning around from Electro and holding up his hands in a victorious fashion "We're going to go above and beyond in terms of frustratingly bad one-liners that involve electricity!"

"Shut up" Electro growled furiously, pushing himself up to his feet and rolling his neck, his glowing eyes focussed on Spider-Man.

"Now, now, there's no reason for your current anger" Spider-Man jeered "If you really feel bad about it, I'll stop making the jokes"

"R-Really?" Electro asked in confusion.

"Sure buddy..." Spider-Man sneered, leaning forward and resting his chin on his fist "Volt-ever you want pal!"

"Oh fuck you" Electro snarled, blasting him over and over again as he danced around, Spider-man's head glancing in the direction of his camera which was still flashing happily in the background in such a way that made it look like a shorting light bulb.

"Alright, so maybe that one was bad" Spider-Man shrugged, blocking the bolts with his glove before slamming it into Electro's face, sending him flying through the air and onto his back with an angered grunt. Spider-Man glanced around, spotting several fire engines stationed around the area and using his webbing he angled the hoses on top of the roofs at Electro.

"Get in the cabin of the truck and fire when I say so!" he ordered. The fireman nodded and sprinted over to the trucks and got into the cabins, Spider-Man sprinting over to Electro and leaping over a blast he threw, landing behind him and sweeping his legs out from underneath him, catching him by the back of the neck and holding him up into the air.

"Fire!" he yelled, getting powerful jets of water from several different fire engines blasting into him and Electro. The water was so powerful that he had to activate his adhesive powers to remain standing but he could heard Electro shorting out in front of him, his eyes squeezed tightly shut to prevent the water from carving through them.

"That's enough, that's enough!" one of the fireman yelled, waving his hand for them to cut off the spray. The water came to a stop to leave a soaked Spider-Man and dim, shorted-out Electro unconscious in his grasp. Spider-Man crowed loudly at the freezing temperature of the night before tearing one of the rubber hoses from the fire engine and tying Electro up with it, leaving a long lead for someone to drag him with.

"And that was... really anticlimactic" Spider-Man sighed "I was hoping there'd be an enormous fight that went on in multiple stages with amazing effects and lots of explosions before I beat him... oh well, swings and roundabouts I suppose, the fight was still fun"

"Good job there Spidey!" one of the firemen yelled.

"You too pal, you guys work a hose like nobody's business!" Spider-Man whooped back, giving a thumbs up before swinging out of sight, landing on the building and grabbing his camera as quick as possible before heading to the Daily Bugle to turn in the photos and pick up his paycheck.


"So much for Electro" Hammerhead growled, throwing the TV remote down onto the desk in annoyance "He was a waste of fuckin money Boss"

"Now, Now Hammerhead" the Big Man said in a calm tone "I think you'll find that he's made us more money than you'd think"

"How so Boss?" Hammerhead asked in confusion.

"With Spider-Man distracted by our dear Max we were able to pull of three successful jobs tonight, taking into account cuts, takes and payouts we've made a grand total of forty nine millions dollars" the Big Man grinned "I think that we need to commission  Mr Osborn to make more of these... these super villians for us, if for nothing more than to distract our friend Spider-Man long enough to complete our business ventures"

"Do you want me to call Osborn now?" Hammerhead asked.

"No, not now Hammerhead, I believe he's busy dealing with a rival inventor" the Big Man said with a wave of his hand "Toomes or something like that if my memory serves me well"

"Ah, so when he's done with the other guy we talk to him?" Hammerhead asked.

"Precisely my friend" the Big Man answered.


Peter tried his best to dry his soaked hair and style it back up while he was at the bugle, borrowing a pot of hair wax from a co-worker's desk and get back to form before he handed the photos into Jonah before ducking out quickly, getting back to the party just over an hour after he'd left. He returned to see Twilight attempting to teach Harry how to dance. Peter walked up behind Mary-Jane who was drinking from a wine glass and sat down behind her.

"Harry, you just stepped on my foot!" Twilight snapped.

"Sorry, I'm not very good at doing this" Harry muttered "I feel like I've got two left feet"

"I think you might... and would you stop being so sheepish about bodily contact already?"

"I can't help it" Harry whimpered.

"Wow" Mary-Jane said to herself, still not realizing Peter was behind her "He is hopeless" Peter grinned widely to himself, watching as Mary-Jane finished her glass of wine and attempted to sit down in the chair he occupied and sat down on his lap.

"Oh" was all she said, standing up quickly and turning around, seeming relieved that it was Peter "I didn't see you come in"

"Yeah, sorry about sneaking up on you" Peter chuckled "Do you want the seat?"

"Have you forgotten what you promised?" she asked with a sly smirk "We were going to dance when you got back remember?"

"Ah, apologized Madame Watson" Peter said in a French accent, standing up and looking at her with a grin "Shall we?"

"Indeed Monsieur" she chuckled, the two of them linking arms as they walked over to the dance floor.

"Lookin' good there Harry!" Peter laughed at his friend.

"Shut it!" Harry snapped, once again stumbling back and nearly taking Twilight to the floor with him.

"D'you want me to show you how its done?" Peter asked.

"Alright then Casanova, the floor's all yours" Harry growled, stepping away as Peter and Mary-Jane walked to the centre of the dance floor, Peter noticing the royal sisters sitting just in range of his vision.

"Ready?" Peter asked Mary-Jane as they stepped close together.

"Ready" she nodded, the song restarting as the two began to sway and move, a constant stream of simple yet intricate steps as the partners remained locked, staring into each other's eyes.

"You have got to be kidding me" Harry growled, folding his arms angrily as Peter chuckled to himself, his eyes catching Twilight smile softly, seeing a change in her previous attitude towards Mary-Jane that night.

"How long are you willing to dance for Monsieur Parker?" Mary-Jane asked.

"Until you want to stop" Peter answered.

"Ah, good to see you're willing to treat a lady" Mary-Jane giggled.

"Of course" Peter said with a wink "The lady is always right"

"Okay, now you're just being cliché" Mary-Jane chuckled.

"Do you want me to stop with the corniness?" he asked.

"Yes please" Mary-Jane laughed. Peter nodded and picked up the pace of the dance slightly as the music picked up, seeing Luna shift uncomfortably in her seat across the room.

"I get the feeling this is all going to come crashing down on my head soon" Peter thought "Best enjoy the attention while I can"

Arranging a Date-That's-Not-A-Date

Mary-Jane rolled over on her bed, lying on her back with her head hanging off the bed, strands of her dark red hair falling freely. She released a slow and long breath, bored to tears by the lack of anything going on in her life at that present moment. Her Aunt Anna had gone to hang out with Peter's Aunt May, leaving her alone in the apartment to fester in her own emotions.

"Well then Ms. Watson..." she mumbled "Are you gonna do something today?" She lifted her head up, looking to see where she had left the random items she'd been playing with. There were three linked, slightly bent paper clips, an instructions sheet from the last box of hair dye she'd bought, her phone lying discarded on the bed, having been disassembled and reassembled four times, and a notebook of high school scribblings she'd done when trigonometry had gotten that extra shade of dull.

"I could call someone to hang out with?" she suggested, lifting her hand up above her head and staring at it "But... I don't have anyone's number from here... just moved remember?" With a frustrated sigh she sat up on the bed and crossed her legs, wishing she'd asked for Twilight or Peter's number the previous night, she'd love to hang out with them today, the summer sun was warm and the New York atmosphere had her constantly energized and excited.

Then a thought struck her.

There was one method she knew of to track down one of them. To track down Peter. It was an old method, ancient to the modern day. A ceremony performed in front of an old dusty tome that would allow her to siphon the information about Peter she needed to track him down. The ceremony itself was time consuming and required a great deal of patience and temperance, but if she was successful then she would be able to save herself from boredom.

"Right" she grunted, getting off the bed "Where does Aunt Anna keep the phone book?"


Peter sat with his legs crossed on the top of the porch extension they'd built a few years ago. In his hand was a S.H.I.E.L.D brand pen with a SITREP form in front of him, to get his side of the Electro story, having been instructed by Fury to complete it and hand it back to him before the end of the week.

"Why is it that no matter where I go, how far I run and how hard I fight I can never escape these fucking homework assignments?" Peter asked irritably "I can't even type it up either" He adjusted himself to sit with one leg hanging over the edge of the roof as he began to scrawl down all of the locations the fights had taken place in and how they went down. His Aunt May was out with Mary-Jane's Aunt Anna, leaving him to be bored and alone the entire day, with Twilight and Harry off on one of their fancy dates and leaving Peter the Puny Cave Troll to sit in his secluded lair and play video games.

"I showed them though" he said proudly "I'm outside now, in the sunshine!" He allowed himself a quick grin of victory before slowly placing a palm to his face and groaning loudly.

"I seriously need a girlfriend" he sighed "That or a better joke reel out of costume" He attempted to continue writing the report before the house phone rang loudly, making him groan angrily at the fact he had to get up and crawl back inside his bedroom window and get the phone from downstairs, the front door being locked and his key being in his other jeans. He sprinted inside and grabbed the phone, hitting the answer button and holding it to his ear.

"Yello?" he asked.

"Wow, don't tell me you seriously answer the phone like that?" a familiar female voice asked from the other end.

"... MJ?" Peter asked "Is that you?"

"Hey Tiger, how're you doing?" Mary-Jane asked sweetly.

"I'm good thanks" Peter nodded "How, if you don't mind me asking, did you get my home number?"

"Phone book" came the simple response.

"You still have one of those?" Peter asked before correcting himself "Those still exist?"

"Its out of date by a few years now but your family has lived in that house for a long time right?" Mary-Jane asked.

"Indeed they have, twenty-seven years if I know my numbers" Peter answered "So what d'you need?"

"I figured, y'know, since our Aunts' are out doing old lady stuff, and we're sat at home bored, if you wanted to do something today?" Mary-Jane proposed. Peter's face lit up like a Christmas tree upon hearing the request and he nodded, unsure as to why as Mary-Jane couldn't see his actions.

"Yeah sure, that'd be great" Peter said "Now where should we go?"

"Well let me just throw it out that I'm new here and don't know many places... how about a tour for me?" Mary-Jane asked.

"Awesome, that sounds like fun... and I might be able to get a few shots for the Daily Bugle to run this new stupid spread Jonah's given me to work on" Peter grinned "Where about's d'you wanna meet?"

"D'you wanna come pick me up?" Mary-Jane asked "In the loosest sense of the word, with you not having a car n'all"

"Sure, its a date" Peter agreed.

"Slow donw there Tiger, you're taking me on a tour of the city, not for dinner and a movie" Mary-Jane chuckled, much to Peter's discontent "We'll start with this and see where we go from there, okay Hotshot?"

"Alright, sorry if I came across a little strong there" Peter sighed, rubbing the back of his neck "I've got this really bad mental condition known as 'stupidity' that makes me say some dumb things every so... all the time" Mary-Jane chuckled at he joke, letting Peter know that she wasn't offended by the previous statement.

"Very funny Tiger... now, if you're ready you can come meet me now" Mary-Jane suggested.

"Sure, I'll swing by soon" Peter said happily.

"Are you forgetting something there Petey?" Mary-Jane asked playfully.

"No... not that I can think of" Peter said "I completed all the recommended steps in the Idiot's Guide to Hot Girls handbook that I'm totally not referencing and that this is all coming from my natural talent and suave demeanour"

Peter coughed at the end of the sentence.

"Yes, very smooth Petey, now how about asking me where I live first?" Mary-Jane asked in an amused tone. Peter was silent for a long second before his voice came through in a wounded tone.

"Whoops, looks like two of the pages got stuck together..." he said slowly before picking up his tone again "So yeah MJ, where abouts do you live?"

Smooth Parker. Smooth like a broken brick.


Peter had decided to forgo a jacket for nearly the first time in his teenage years, deciding to stick with his combo of light blue shirt and dark blue, long-sleeved under shirt with his camera in a small bag on his hip. He walked up the last few stairs to Mary-Jane's apartment before knocking lightly on the door.

"Number forty-two" Peter said, reading the number aloud "Good number" The door swung open a few moments later and Mary-Jane stood there with a smile on her face, her red hair matte and thickened this time around instead of the straightened appearance it had the previous night. She wore a black jacket and a green shirt with a pair of blue jeans.

"Hey Tiger" she said with a nod "Where're you taking me first?"

"I figured we could go to the hub of New York City, Central Park" Peter shrugged "Its the number one place to see the amazing, spectacular sights of nature in the big city and the rampant amount of lunatics we get here"

Though hopefully none of the super-powered kind.

Mary-Jane looked at him for a long second before nodding contentedly.

"Sounds like great fun, shall we go?" Mary-Jane asked.

"Indeed we shall" Peter nodded, stuffing his hands into his pockets as Mary-Jane locked the door and stuffed the keys into her pocket, the two of them beginning to walk.

Major Trouble

"Huh... wasn't expecting that" Peter said as he looked down the park, seeing a large camo tent with several military vehicles.

"Wassup?" Mary-Jane asked, following Peter's eye-line before she spotted the tent "Wow, almost didn't see it there" Peter smirked at the joke before the two of them headed over to it without discussing it, their interests being piqued and their curiosity gained. Upon closer examination  they discovered it was actually a US Forces public tour, with several different schools being shown around the different weapons, ranging from tanks to jet planes that had been towed into the park.

As the two of them approached the tour ground they were stopped by a large soldier in his camouflage uniform.

"Sorry kid, you're not allowed in here" he said in a gruff voice. Peter was silent for a long second before pointing at the sign just a few feet away.

"Its a public tour" he said quizzically.

"Yeah, for schools" the soldier corrected. Peter glared angrily at the man before Mary-Jane rolled her eyes.

"See Pete, this is why we use our work cards to get into these places" she said, taking a small badge out of her purse and holding it up for the soldier to see "We've been sent by the Daily Bugle to take a few pictures for a story we're working on about the military's renewed attempts to revive public support for their troops after the Iraq war" The man took the press badge and stared at it with scrutiny for a moment before handing it back to her.

"Alright then, the CO told us about you guys showing up sooner or later" he said with a sigh "Sorry about that"

"No problem" Mary-Jane smiled, the soldier moving aside and allowing the two of them into the tent. Once the soldier was out of earshot Peter spoke to Mary-Jane.

"Were you supposed to write up the story?" he asked.

"No, J.J gave it to Bobby and Alexis but I need the paycheck" Mary-Jane shrugged.

"That's... that's kind of a jerk thing to do M-J" Peter said in a surprised tone.

"Hey, they stole my cover story about Spider-Man's fight with Electro" she said with a wave of her hand "Its fair"

"Did... did you know that this was gonna be here before we came out?" Peter asked.

"No, I knew that the two of them had been asked by J.J to do a story on the tour stuff but I didn't know where... so since we're here I figured I'd steal their thunder this time"

"Alright then" Peter nodded. He followed after M-J who had taken a notepad out of her bag before she talked to a few of the soldiers standing guard over the machines, leaving Peter to wander off by himself, although she had told him not to touch anything.

"Right" Peter said, cracking his knuckles "What looks the most fun to touch?"

"I wouldn't recommend it" a female voice said behind him. He turned around quickly to see a woman with tied back blonde hair wearing a green uniform. Peter leaned to the side, inspecting the taller woman's rank badge before reading the name on her chest.

"Major Danvers?" he asked her.

"That'd be me" she nodded "Can I help you?"

"Not really, I'm kinda just wasting time and taking photos while my partner does the brunt of the work" Peter shrugged, holding out a hand to the army major "Peter Parker"

"Caroline Danvers" she said "But everyone just calls me Carol"

"Right... you don't mind if I take a few shots of the tanks do you?" Peter asked.

"If they can take shells and rounds without feeling bad I think they can take a few camera flashes" Carol chuckled.

"Nah, never use the flash against polished metal, creates a reflection that ruins the photo, just like flash on in the mirror" Peter stated as he took a picture of the tank's serial number.

"Okay then, you seem to know a lot about pictures, maybe we can get together and you can give me a few lesson" she said, pretending to hold out a notepad "I'll just make a note of your name, it was Peter Pedantic right? With a capital P?" Peter laughed at the joke and turned around with a sheepish smile, scratching the back of his head with a nervous chuckle.

"Sorry, I can seem a little bit... prickish when you first meet me" Peter apologized "But I feel that goes away after you get to know me"

"Oh, I've heard that saying before" Carol nodded with a smirk "Doesn't that basically mean 'I'm an asshole but you'll get used to it'?" Peter laughed again and grinned, nodding his head slowly as he went back to get another angle on the tank.

"Pretty much, yeah" he chuckled "So, I recognize the rank badge but not the uniform, what corps do you belong to? Marines? Or maybe the Tank Battalions?"

"Not in the US Army, I'm in the Air Force" Carol corrected "The tanks are nice and all, but I've always preferred fighter jets, ever since I was a kid I've loved the thought of flying"

"I think we all do" Peter nodded "But not many of us actually get to"

"What about you?" Carol asked "You interested in enlisting?"

"Sorry, I don't think the military life's the one for me" Peter said with a shake of head "Too soft for it"

"Fair enough" she shrugged, leaning a shoulder against the tank "But if you were interested, what would you go for?"

"Huh... I've always been more intellectual than brute force, maybe something in intelligence?" Peter suggested only to receive a disbelieving look from Carol "What?"

"Nothing, nothing... its just that, by looking at you, I figured you'd go for a more combat-orientated corps than intelligence" she said, looking down and chuckling to herself "But, hey, I'm not judging you" Peter was about to ask another question before his Spider-Sense went off, causing him to look to his right where he spotted the same soldier who'd stopped them coming in before reach into his pocket and pull out a small black box.

"What's the matter?" Carol asked.

"Its... nothing, it doesn't matter" Peter said as the man thumbed a button before putting the box away. Carol looked over his shoulder and saw what he was looking at, raising an eyebrow of her own.

"Wait... who the hell is that?" she asked.

"You don't recognize him?" Peter asked.

"No... I've got no idea who he is" she answered, taking her radio off her belt "Gimme a sec" She thumbed down the call button before speaking into the device.

"Zulu units this is CP, just checking in" she said "All units respond" There came several responses from other soldiers as they gave their unit, number and position but the man who had stopped Peter earlier didn't answer a radio call.

"He didn't answer... that's bad right?" Peter asked.

"Either he's got his radio off, which is against protocol on all situations in the field not classified as radio silent" she began "Or..."

"Or?" Peter asked.

"I think it would be best if you got out of here" Carol said, placing a hand on Peter's shoulder and beginning to steer him somewhere else "You get your partner and head out, this could be trouble"

"R-Right" Peter nodded, scratching under his shirt, his fingers rubbing against the fabric of his Spider-Man costume "I'll get her now" Peter looked around for Mary-Jane, spotting several other soldiers using the same black boxes as the previous one thanks to warnings from his Spider-Sense. He placed a hand on Mary-Jane's shoulder as he came up behind her, making the red-head jump slightly in surprise.

"What's the matter Pete?" she asked "I'm kinda busy"

"We need to go" Peter answered "Something here isn't right"

"What're you talking about?" she asked with a chuckle "I'm enjoying a chat with one of the soldiers" Peter looked up at him with a scrutinizing expression, deciding to use the same tactic Carol had.

"Your CP just sent out a call, she's a controlling one isn't she?" he asked.

"What're you on about?" the soldier asked angrily "I'm trying to talk here"

"Just saying that Lieutenant Danvers is kind of a pain" Peter shrugged.

"Yeah... yeah she is" the soldier responded with a nod. Peter knew now that something definitely wasn't right and he looked at Mary-Jane once again.

"Seriously M-J, we need to go" Peter said. It was at this point his Spider-Sense went off, a much stronger warning than before. He veered to the side as a hand attempted to grab him and he grabbed hold of the scruff of Mary-Jane's shoulder and dragged her away, feeling the eyes of the soldiers burning holes in his back.

Mary-Jane tore away from him and glared at him furiously, grabbing him by the collar and pulling him down to her level.

"What the fuck if your problem?" she demanded, her green eyes bright with fury. Peter didn't respond for a second, thinking of a good way to explain to her why he had seemingly abducted her like that.

Luckily for him, that answer came in the form of one of the smaller APCs exploding violently, seemingly destroyed by an exterior force judging by the way the vehicle's hull was crippled. Peter threw the two of them to the ground as a stream of bullets flew in from outside the tent.

"Yeah, that's why" Peter said as he dragged Mary-Jane back to her feet and pushing her forward "You need to get out of here!"

"Me? What about you?" Mary-Jane asked in an angry tone.

"I'll be fine, just go!" Peter said, shoving her forwards just in time for an unarmed soldier to sprint past them "Hey! Civilian here!" The young soldier stopped and looked at Mary-Jane before nodding, grabbing hold of her arm and pulling her with him.

"Wait, Peter!" Mary-Jane yelled but to no avail as the taller, stronger soldier pulled her alongside him as he began to gather more people to get them to safety. The crowd soon obscured Peter and he used this moment to vanish, setting his camera up on the string of a flagpole and hoisting it up higher before ducking into a porta-potty to change.

"Ewww" he groaned in disgust as the smell of the toilet hit his nose.

Marvellous Intervention

The sounds of gunfire lit up the park as several of the decoy soldiers had turned their weapons on the servicemen, gunning them down mercilessly as the single iron-man suited attacker stormed through the civilians in their attempt to scare them off or kill those that remained.

"Get the choppers in here for the extraction before the fucking cops show up!" one of the attackers bellowed, throwing down a green smoke grenade before moving over to the other tanks "We don't need the jets, they're tracked!"

"Aye boss!" another attacker yelled.

"Um, excuse me?" came the familiar cartoonish New York accent from a nearby street lamp "These things are parked legally, there's no reason to ticket and tow them officers!" Spider-Man's Spider-Sense went off again and he threw himself forwards as another bullet was fired from a building outside the park.

"Whoa!" he exclaimed "And I used to wonder why nobody liked parking wardens, now I know why"

"Can somebody shut this mother fucker up?" the attacker asked "He's giving me a headache and I don't wanna have to put up with that annoying voice any more" Spider-Man put a hand to his face and gasped loudly.

"I am offended at the merest insinuation of my vocal emissions even being perceived as less than something joyous to partake in!" he hollered in a posh British accent.

"What?" the attacker asked in confusion. Spider-Man launched forward and slammed his fist into the man's jaw, knocking him to the floor in an unconscious state.

"I said don't you fucking call me annoying" Spider-Man spat.

"Eric, Marcel, you two in the tanks, we're gonna smear this bastard all over the park!" one of the other attackers barked before turning to the man in the Iron Man armour and pointing at him "You hold him in place, we need these things as stocked for the boss as possible!"

"Now, now, I think we can all work this out like reasonable adults... right?" Spider-Man asked, holding his hands up. The Iron Man armour then blasted towards him, holding out its arms in an attempt to grab him. He knew that no matter what direction he went it would clip at least some part of him and that it would cause him major damage.

Luckily though, there came something much tougher than both of them in between the two of them.

A woman with flowing blonde hair dressed in a black unitard with a yellow lightning bolt, red sash around her hips, black elbows gloves with black thigh high boots and a thin, black eye mask. She held out her hands and caught the armour in mid-flight, her arms containing much more strength than at first sight.

"Alright!" Spider-Man exclaimed happily "I have a tag team partner... ooh, can we have a team name too?!" She turned her head to look at him with a raised eyebrow and Spider-Man lowered his hands from the spot he held them above his head.

"Right... I'll shut up now" he mumbled. The woman let go of the armour with one hand, the armour now using the full power of the jets to no avail, and with one quick punch she crushed the helmet of the grey suit, the sound of metal tearing and bones breaking as her fist punched straight through the other side of the helmet with blood and brain matter sticking to it.

"Holy hell lady, that's a bit excessive isn't it?" Spider-Man asked in horror.

"They're attempting to steal military technology and have slaughtered servicemen and civilians" she said, removing her fist from the cavity of the dead man's skull and throwing the dead weight to the side "Don't expect me to pull punches"

"I... I'm not asking you to but, Jesus, do you need a tissue or some baby wipes for that mess?" he asked, pointing at her gore-smeared hand.

"It'll come out in the wash" she shrugged "Can we get back to work please?"

"Why does it sound like you know that from experience?" he asked quickly.

"Move!" she snapped, grabbing hold of him and throwing him over to one of the tanks, Spider-Man's flailing form knocking off one of the attackers while the second one had already entered the tank and had begun piloting it "Damn it" The second tank's cannon whirled round to face her, the sound of a shell being loaded into the cannon followed by the cannon firing.

There was a moment of suspense as the shell was blasted towards the blonde woman who made no attempt to move, instead she held out her hand and caught the shell, closing her hand around it and stopping it in mid-air.

"Whoa" Spider-Man said in an amazed tone, pushing himself up off the unconscious man he'd been thrown out.

"Light her up!" one of the decoy soldiers yelled. There was another loud clanging sound followed by the machine gun on the front of the tank firing wildly, each round hitting its mark but leaving no impact on this seemingly-indestructible woman.

"She's able to catch tank shells and is immune to gunfire..." Spider-Man mumbled, leaping over to the other tank and pulling the lid off it "And I get to stick to walls and tell bad jokes? How the hell is that fair?" The man inside the tank struggled briefly before Spider-Man socked him in the face and dragged his unconscious form out of the tank, throwing him to the side.

"And that takes care of that" Spider-Man nodded, hopping down off the tank and dusting off his hands as the woman walked over to him.

"Who are you exactly?" she asked him with a raised eyebrow.

"I, uh, I'm Spider-Man" he said "You haven't been around for the past month have you?"

"No, I was dealing with a few things in Siberia" she answered "Who do you work for?"

"Nobody" he shrugged "I do freelance work"

"He works for us" a familiar female voice said. The two of them turned around to see Black Widow standing with her arms crossed, once again wearing her civilian garb.

"No I don't" Spider-Man said quickly "I don't work for anybody"

"You're gonna have to pick a side sooner or later Web-Head" Widow said quickly.

"Maybe, but for now I quite like the fence I'm sitting on" Spider-Man shrugged "Its got a good coat of paint on it"

"Right, whatever" Widow said "Fury wants to see you tomorrow about the Electro ordeal and you have another session with the Cap too"

"Right... why does Fury wanna see me?" Spider-Man asked "He already gave me the case study to fill in"

"He wants to hear it in person as well as writing" Widow responded.

"Why?" Spider-Man questioned in a puzzled tone.

"Don't ask questions above your pay grade kid" Widow said with a sigh.

"I don't have a pay grade" Spider-Man said curtly.

"Then shut up and do as you're told" Widow said simply before going on to talk to the blonde woman "Ms. Marvel, I trust that you've been keeping an eye on our little friend here?"

"Um... I believe so" she said in a confused tone "Was I supposed to be?"

"Not really, but since the two of you have met you might as well get to know each other" Widow shrugged "Spider-Man this is Ms. Marvel, Ms. Marvel this is Spider-Man" The two of them shook hands before Widow spoke up again.

"If you don't mind Ms. Marvel, Fury wants to get a SITREP about your mission in Siberia right about now, he sent me to come get you and I was just lucky to run into the kid" she explained.

"Right, I'll meet you back at the Triskellion" Ms. Marvel nodded before flying off into the air and leaving the two of them behind.

"So... are we gonna stay here for the sake of public appearances?" Spider-Man asked "Because I've got somewhere else to be" Black Widow looked at him for a long second before turning away without answering the question. Seconds passed before Spider-Man yelled a response out to her.

"I'll take that as a yes!" he called before falling silent "And now I have to go back into that fucking toilet and change again... I don't wanna be Spider-Man any more"

Arranging The Date-That-Is-A-Date-This-Time-Though

Peter had recently escaped from the stench-sullied porta-potty of hell, praising every god he knew of for the fresh air he was now experiencing before lowering his camera and going through the pictures before making a quick exit out of the park.

"Right, now to find M-J" Peter said to himself, placing his camera back into its bag and blending in with the crowd. He made his way through the sea of people before spotting the familiar red hair of Ms. Watson. He rushed over to her and tapped her on the shoulder, making her jump slightly.

"Jesus Parker, where the hell have you been?" she asked angrily, placing her hands on her hips.

"Uh, work?" he offered.

"Work?" she exclaimed furiously "There were guys with guns, tanks and super powers in there, you could've been killed!"

"I know" Peter said, crossing his arms and grinning "Do you remember the talk we had about my dangerous job?" Mary-Jane stared at him with a bewildered expression for a long moment before shaking her head in disbelief.

"What?" Peter asked with a smile.

"You're insane" she said.

"I prefer the term 'Intellectually Different'" Peter shrugged "So, where do you wanna go next?" Mary-Jane's expression changed to a very puzzled look, her face turning away from Peter slightly as she eyed him up and down to judge whether or not he was serious.

"You're kidding right?" she asked.

"Should I be?" Peter asked with his own confused look.

"After all that, you still wanna keep going?" she asked.

"Do you not?"

"Kinda, yeah" Mary-Jane nodded "I'm exhausted from all that, do you mind taking me home?" Peter nodded slowly, wiping his mouth to clear a build-up of dead skin, before smiling.

"Sure" he nodded, moving his finger in a vertical circular motion "Let's go"


Peter walked at a leisurely pace through the street, looking up at the sky as his Spider-Sense went off in time to see a black-clothed and white-haired face leaping over a gap in two roofs.

"Cat?" he asked himself with a grin "I was wondering where she'd disappeared to" With a duck into an alley and a quick costume change he was up on the roofs, pursuing the flirtatious feline at great speed. He could see her off in the distance and knew that he was making good ground on her, seeing her leap onto a large railing on the edge of a building.

"Right, try not to scare her Parker" he reminded himself as he leaped forward, trying his best to emulate the triple jump from Mario 64 before landing on the railing next to her with a grunt. Black Cat flinched briefly before a smile spread onto her face.

"Well, hello there Spider" she purred "I've missed you"

"Well if you wanted to see me more you should've stuck around after our last date" Spider-Man said, throwing up his hands in a questioning manner.

"Sorry honey, its just that a burning building isn't a very romantic spot, especially for a girl with hair as good as mine" she said, running her hand through her thick white locks.

"It is indeed something to be worried about" Spider-Man nodded "And I admit that I was at fault for the catastrophe of our last night on the town"

"Then why don't you make it up to me?" she asked playfully "Why don't you come meet me on the Chrysler building at... say midnight tonight and we'll have a proper date? My treat?" Spider-Man was initially reprehensive due to his nine PM curfew but he knew that he could ask to stay at Harry's for the night. Or at least say he did.

"Wait... why am I this eager to lie to my friends and family just to get a chance to talk to her?" he asked himself, looking out over the city with the conflict going on in his head "I should really just break this off now before it goes any further... if the news gets out that Spider-Man and the Black Cat are dating it could ruin my image, Shining could take this further and arrest Peter Parker, go public with my identity and I could go to jail... fuck man, why am I even doing this with her?"

"So?" What's your answer Spider?" Black Cat asked, turning to face him and placing a hand on his abdomen, leaning extremely close and holding her mouth just centimetres away from his own, albeit under a mask "I don't want to spend the night alone again... we can have a lot of fun if you say yes"

"Oh yeah, that's why" Spider-Man thought, sighing loudly before giving his answer "Yeah sure, I'll be there"

"Thanks honey" Black Cat said, kissing him on the cheek "Don't keep me waiting, I get fidgety when I'm bored, you might show up and I'll have had all my fun already" With that she threw herself off the side of the roof and used her white grappling lines to swing away down the street. Spider-Man was silent for a long second before putting his face in his hands and sighing louder than before.

"Fuck Parker, what're you doing?" he asked himself in disappointment. With his conscience beating him down her threw himself off the roof and headed in the opposite way that Black Cat had, his stomach turning as he flipped and swung through the open air.


Peter closed the door as he walked into the penthouse, the same penthouse Shining and Cadance lived in just in time to hear a very heated argument.

"I can't believe you even thought about saying that much less doing it!" he heard Celestia bellow at someone. He walked into the room to see the royal sisters nearly at each others throats in a very aggressive argument. The two of them were dressed very formally, both wearing dresses and being heavily made up, adding to their almost inhuman levels of beauty, with eyes alight as fire with anger.

"It was something we were all thinking and for some reason I'm in the shit for voicing it?!" Luna screamed. Peter stayed at the back of the room with his back leaning against the wall, still conflicted about his meeting with Black Cat and how long he was going to ride the train for before its inevitable derailing later on down the line. He pondered the best place to jump off but still knew that now that he was on it, no matter where he jumped, it was still going to hurt.

"Yes Luna, it was one of the most racist comments I've ever heard in modern politics!" Celestia hissed, pressing her fingers to her temples and turning away from her sister.

"How?!" Luna demanded.

"How? How?!, no you're right sister, I don't see how asking if we're going to devout more of the national defence budget to black and Latino areas of the country due to the high crime rates could ever be interpreted as racist, can you?!" Celestia roared, turning around and pointing a finger at her sister's face "Do you understand how much work I'm going to have to put into this to make sure this doesn't destroy yours, and my own, public approval rating in the coming weeks, Jesus Luna the last time I had to cover up something this bad was when I was trying to convince the Allies to erase your records with the SS at the end of the Second World War!"

"Whoa, whoa, what?" Cadance asked in utter horror.

"Oh, you mean I never told you that?" Celestia asked "That your Dear Aunt Luna was once the Captain of her very own SS battalion?" There was a second of shocked silence before Luna stepped in again.

"From the late twenties to the mid thirties, I denounced the SS and the rest of the Nazi Party three years before the War broke out, after I found out what they were doing off the record!" Luna snarled, trying her best to defend herself.

"But you joined them in the first place because you agreed with more than a few of Hitler's policies didn't you?" Celestia continued, not allowing Luna to drop the subject.

"As did you!" Luna snarled, jabbing her own finger at Celestia "We both agreed that it was a miracle that he was able to pull Germany out of the worst recession its ever seen and re-arm the country from using nothing more than its own men and resources, but we both drew the line when Hitler began to put into place his ideas about racial superiority and his Aryan race... and if I remember correctly he came to you to be the birth mother of the Aryan race didn't he?" The two sisters glared furiously at each other, one more dirty secret away from starting a brawl before Cadance intervened.

"Alright, now that we've aired secrets that could personally sink America as the leaders of the free world, in front of civilians I might add, can you two just walk away from each other now and cool off?" she asked "I didn't invite you two here to scream my fucking apartment down because one of you, or both of you, fucked up in your conference"

"I never-" the two began.

"Shut it, both of you" Cadance growled furiously "I don't want to hear another fucking word from either of you for the next hour, Celestia you go into the spare bedroom and compose yourself, Luna you go into the gym room and work your anger out" The two sisters crossed their arms defiantly, staring at the crowd with their chests heaving, both of them out of breath from their screaming match.

Now!" Cadance yelled, causing the two sisters to jump and move away from each other, both doing as they were told. There was a moment of silence in the room before Twilight spoke up.

"I... I've never seen either of them act like that before" she said quietly.

"I've seen it a few times, once worse than this" Cadance said, sitting down on the couch and putting a hand to her forehead "Those two are over five millenia old, have seen disease, war and genocide and are some of the most resilient and emotionally stable women I've ever seen... but the minute either one of them starts arguing with the other they turn into stroppy fucking teenagers again and it does my head in" There was another moment of silence before a loud banging noise came followed by a shattering sound, causing Cadance to rocket out of her seat.

"I swear to God if that pumped up old cow has broken another fucking mirror then I'm gonna put her head in a fucking belt sander" Cadance hissed, storming into the weight room and slamming the door behind her.

"Well..." Peter said, surprising everyone present as they hadn't seen him enter the room "She is terrifying when she wants to be"

"Amen" they all responded.

Black Cat and Spider-Man: A Match Made in 'Not a Chance in Hell'

"So, you're staying at Harry's tonight?" May asked down the phone.

"Yeah, I should be back home tomorrow morning though, I'll get the bus back" Peter nodded, still feeling slightly guilty about lying to his family. The night life of New York was in full swing beneath him with groups of men and women going out to drink and party, others on their way to their night shifts and some on their way home from an extra long day at work.

"Are you sure you've got enough money for the bus?" May asked "You've spent quite a lot of your money this month on your video games haven't you?"

"I'll be able to afford it Aunt May, stop worrying about it" Peter snapped irritably, angry at the fact he had to fill in a questionnaire over the phone according to him.

"Oh... alright then sweety, just be safe" May said in an offended tone. Peter placed a hand to his face and sighed angrily.

"Look Aunt May, I don't mean to act like a dick but its just that I'm kinda stressed out at the moment with... work and everything" Peter lied, a pang of guilt hitting his stomach "Sorry..."

"Alright then Peter, I'll let you go now, I love you" May said quietly.

"I... I love you too" Peter nodded, listening to the phone hang up before an explosion of anger hit him, causing him to throw his phone out into the open air before using his web-shooters to catch it and bring it back over to him "Fuck me, why am I acting like this all of a sudden?" He checked his phone to see that it was eleven forty five and that it was almost time to go see Black Cat.

He pulled his mask over his face and leaped over the edge of the building he sat on, plummeting down into the streets before he used his web-shooters to move through the air.

"I can't believe I blew Aunt May off like that" he sighed, the wind curving around his aerodynamic costume as he swung rapidly through the air "I have no idea where... where that even came from, I don't usually act like that" Spider-Man sprinted alongside a wall before using his fingers to latch onto the corner and swing himself around it, firing another web-line onto a higher building and swinging around at great speed.

"Maybe I wasn't lying, maybe I am stressed out... that's an option right?" he asked "I am allowed to feel stressed and upset about this whole superhero gig aren't I? I'm not just supposed to soldier on thought it without ever telling anyone how I feel on the inside?" After bouncing between two walls he fired two web-lines between two different buildings, sling-shotting forwards and higher into the air.

"Right, you're in the deep end Parker so you might as well just drown peacefully with your large-breasted rock tied to your foot" Spider-Man sighed, falling silent for a long second as he landed on a rooftop "Now that is not an image I wanted in my head" He made the rest of the way to the Chrysler building in silence, landing on one of the eagles to see a familiar face sitting on a blanket with candles lit, a bottle of champagne and a basket of different bread rolls.

"Wow, all this just for little ol' me?" he asked as he walked over to her.

"I figured I'd give us a little treat" she chuckled, taking the bottle of champagne and uncorking it, pouring it into two glasses and handing one to him as they sat down "You a big drinker?"

"Never touch the stuff personally" he shrugged "But I'll make an exception for you"

"Thank you" she winked, taking a sip from her glass. Spider-Man pulled his mask up to his nose and sipped from the champagne, a very expensive tasting crackle filling his mouth with a surge of different flavours.

"What is this stuff?" Peter asked, licking his lips.

"Cristal brand champagne" she answered, swilling the drink around and looking at the golden solution.

"I've heard of that before, Rick Ross is big on the stuff" Spider-Man answered.

"Who?" she asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Rick Ross, he's a big rapper these days, kinda sucks but hey, I'm not supporting him" Spider-Man shrugged as he took another drink "This is really nice"

"Right, and are you big on the rap game?" she asked in a mocking tone "I'm guessing as a white guy you're a big fan of Eminem right? Think he's the best ever?" Spider-Man picked up a bread roll, taking a bite out of it before giving an answer.

"No, I'm a big fan of the guy but he's not the best" Spider-Man answered "If anything I think Pac, B.I.G and Nas are better than Em" There was a few seconds of silence before Spider-Man looked up at Cat who was staring at him with a blank face.

"What?" he asked.

"I think..." she said, lowering her legs over the edge of the eagle "...Maybe, I know two of those people and that's Tupac and Eminem, but this B.I.G guy and Nas, I've got no idea" Spider-Man finished the bread roll before washing it down with another sip of Cristal.

"B.I.G is the nickname for Biggie Smalls, huge rapper back in the nineties and Nas holds the record for the best hip-hop album, in my opinion, with Illmatic in ninety-four" he explained "Nas had quite a big feud with Jay-Z a few years back because Jay sampled Nas's voice on a track and since Nas didn't get direct payment for it, his label did, and Nas didn't like it so he dissed Jay on a radio interview or his own track if I think. Jay bit back by dissing Nas in a song called The Takeover and Nas hit him with Ether which completely destroyed Jay"

"Um... you're a lot more well versed in this than I thought" Black Cat said slowly, dragging a finger around the rim of her glass "Its kinda sad to be honest"

"We all have our things, mine's rap music and video games" Spider-Man said, lying down on his back as he set his drink down next to him "I was hoping to make it big in the MLG circuit one of these days"

"MLG? Isn't that what gamers use to insult each other?" she asked with a finger on her lip.

"Its used sarcastically nowadays but when it first came around it was a big name that commanded a lot of respect in gaming matches" he explained.

"But, it just a title right, like being knighted by the Queen, it doesn't get you anything really" Black Cat said, finishing her glass with a quick gulp.

"No, actually there's a lot of money to be made in video games, especially in professional Counter Strike and Dota 2 tournaments" he said "They held a competition in for Dota 2 called the International where the first place prize was just under five and a half million dollars" Black Cat was silent for a long second, stunned into silence, before speaking.

"That much money?" she asked in complete shock "But... when I was in high school the only thing you won from video games was an ass-kicking, gamers were losers that got beat up and forced to sit together in their own loser tables"

"If you think that's amazing, did you know that in South Korea the people that play a game called Starcraft professionally are recognized as professional athletes?"

"You're not serious" Black Cat asked, sitting up straight and looking at the red and blue clad superhero "You can't be serious"

"Oh I am, gaming is a major industry that's up there in terms of money making with things like movies, TV and sports" Spider-Man chuckled, using his webbing the grab another bread roll, taking a bite out of it after removing the webbing "Its an industry that's worth billions of dollars that, like most other industries, has their own press releases and superstars, events like E3 and the PAX conventions are flocked to by millions every year and people like Shigeru Miyamoto and Hidea Kojima are heralded as legendary heroes among gamers like me"

"But... they just sit in front of computers and type in shitty code" Black Cat said in protest "How can they be heroes?"

"In the same way people like Kubrick, Spielberg and Tarantino are considered to be, they're entertainers who make a specific product that millions of people love, Miyamoto and Kojima are the men behind by two all-time favourite video game series', the Legend of Zelda and Metal Gear"

"But..." she said, placing a hand to her face "How can such a shit industry be so successful?!"

"Whoa, whoa there girl, there may be some bad apples in the bunch but gaming as an industry is one of the best things to happen to the world!" Spider-Man said, sitting up and pointing a finger at her "I've been playing video games since I was seven years old!"

"But its for losers who can't get girlfriends!" Black Cat snapped "Losers don't make things successful!"

"Then why the hell is porn such a successful industry?" Spider-Man asked with a shrug "Its made for losers who can't get girlfriends and that makes billions every year"

"That's because it acts as an escape, let's people imagine things they can't do themselves" Black Cat said, setting down her glass and moving over to him, sitting down next to him and folding her arms.

"And you think video games don't?" Spider-Man asked "I can't remember how many hours I've sunk into Hyrule, Shadow Moses, Skyrim, Morrowind, Daggerfall, New Vegas and the Capital Wasteland, they're places I'e spent so long in that I know them like the back of my hand, most recently Liberty City and Los Santos have become my favourite places to spend time just driving around and shooting people" Black Cat suddenly straddled Spider-Man and placed her mouth next to his ear.

"Why are you such a loser?" she asked with a grin "I was attracted to the short, bright and costumed thing before but the more I know about you the more and more of a dork I realize you are"

"There's nothing wrong with... wait, what do you mean short?" he asked after realizing what she'd said.

"What don't I mean when I say short, you're tiny!" she giggled, placing a hand on the top of his head "You're like the smallest thing I've ever seen!"

"No I am not!" Spider-Man snapped angrily, sitting up straight and lifting her up before putting her down on the eagle.

"You're like three-foot-nothing" she said giving him a saucy smirk "I've seen fifteen year olds bigger than you"

"I'm five foot seven Cat, you're not that much bigger than me!" he growled.

"I'm five foot ten, closer to six foot when I'm in my costume" she said, resting on her elbow as she lay on her side with a wide grin "Compared to what the national average for a woman is supposed to be I'm nearly a giant"

"I know, national average if five-three but I'm not that much shorter than most men" he said, crossing his arms defensively.

"Baby, most of the men I run into on the street are averaging from five-eleven to six-six, I've seen high schoolers that average around six foot tall, you're practically non-existent compared to them at your height" she laughed, watching as Spider-Man ground his teeth angrily "Sorry, am I upsetting you shorty?"

"Don't call me that" he hissed.

"How tall was your father?" Cat asked.

"What?" Spider-Man asked angrily "Why does that matter?"

"Because I wanna see ow much you've lost, or gained depending on your answer, in regards to Dear ol' Daddy" Cat said with a playful smile "Go on, how big was he?"

"Six... Six three and a half I think" he answered quietly.

"And Mommy?" she asked.

"Five nine, nearly five ten" he answered. Black Cat looked at him for a long second before laughing hysterically, rolling onto her back and hugging herself.

"Shut up!" Spider-Man snapped "I don't really care about my height to be honest"

"You should, if you were taller more women would take you seriously" Cat sniggered, wiping a tear away "Christ honey, you really lost out in the genetic gamble there, how sad would it be for you to stand shorter than your own mother?"

"Shut up!" he repeated.

"Sorry... thought if you've got a handsome face under there I guess women might give you a second glance, maybe" Cat smirked "You've got a very masculine jawline there baby... care to let me see what the rest of you looks like?" Spider-Man tensed briefly, this action noticed by Cat who then went on to question it.

"What's wrong?" she asked "You're not ashamed of your face are you? What, are you ginger or something? Freckly? I'm sure it can't be bad enough to make you wanna run a mile can it?"

"Uhhh..." Spider-Man said slowly, taking a step back.

"Now you've got me intrigued... I really wanna see now" she said, licking her lips "Come on Spider, I promise I won't laugh"

"No... I'd rather stay masked if its all the same to you" Spider-Man said. Black Cat rolled her eyes for a second before looking down, this seeming to Spider-Man that she was dropping the subject.

Turns out he wasn't as sharp as he wanted to be.

She then whipped out her arm, using her grappling hook to pull his leg out from underneath him before he even had time to react. He fell to the floor, Spider-Sense screaming loudly in his head as Black Cat used the same ropes to tie him down that she had before. He tried to pull away but the eagle they were on was made out a much stronger material than the roof this had happened before on and he was unable to escape.

"Cat, don't!" he snapped. She straddled him once again, moving her hands up to his mask with deliberate slowness.

"Relax Spider, we're both adults here" she giggled.

"Fuck, how wrong could she get" he thought.

"And I'm sure that if you don't tell me your name then you don't have to worry about your secret identity getting out... as long as we don't pass each other in the street that is"

"Cat please I am begging you to not do this" he said quickly.

"What's the matter Spider?" she asked, kissing him on the lips briefly before continuing to speak "You're not scared are you?"

"For you, yeah I am" he nodded, trying again to pull away.

"Why?" she smirked "Are you afraid that your handsomeness will make me faint?"

"Not that, but I think there might be some fainting involved... you're only going to hurt yourself by doing this" he said as she tucked her fingers under the rest of his mask.

"Come on now honey, just let me see-" she said, taking the mask off and looking to the side as she threw it away "And we can-" Her eyes fell onto the extremely young face of Peter Parker and she froze in place, her gorgeous green eyes widening in horror as she found herself trying to seduce a teenager. She threw herself off him and he finally managed to tear the cuffs away, by tearing a metal panel off the eagle they were on. He kicked up to his feet and stared at her, the two of them shocked into silence.

"What the fuck..." she said in disgust "How old are you... you're like twelve years old!"

"I'm fifteen actually" he said, hanging his head and running a hand through his hair to get it to stand up to its usual volume again "Not that it matters to you... I told you not to do it" Black Cat seemed to convulse briefly before placing a hand to her mouth, seemingly to stop herself from throwing up everywhere.

"You alright there?" Peter asked, holding out a hand to her before she swatted him away furiously.

"Why didn't you say anything!?" she demanded angrily.

"What the fuck was I supposed to say?" he demanded "'I know that you're a female super villain who has been trying to seduce me since we met but guess what? I'm a fifteen year old boy!' Is that what you wanted me to do?"

"I... I, fuck kid, I don't know what the hell I wanted you to do" she said, clenching a fist before grabbing him by the costume and dragging him over to her with fury in her eyes "But right now I want you to get the fuck away from me and never come back" She then realized how close they were and shoved him back again before placing a hand to her mouth again and leaping off the side of the building. Peter sighed angrily, putting a hand to his face and shaking his head.

"Nice going Parker... this train derailed much faster than you wanted it to" he growled. He retrieved his mask and pulled it over his head, sitting down on the edge of the roof and looking down at the picnic.

"At least I get to keep the wine" he said, not wanting to leave any evidence behind. He blew out the candles and wrapped everything up in the blanket before webbing it to his back and leaving the scene of the disaster.

"And now I need to find something to do for twelve hours because I can't go home without being given another questionnaire about why I'm home early, having to say there was a problem at Harry's, Aunt May calling Harry's Mom, her exposing the lie and me getting grounded for lying to my family again... fuck man, this superhero stuff isn't easy"

S.H.I.E.L.D Files of The Mysterious Kind

Spider-Man landed on the roof of the Triskellion with a heavy sigh, looking around for a hatch to enter instead of going through the front entrance.

"I can hang here for a while" he said in a deflated tone, still angry at his own stupidity to allow his identity to be revealed to Black Cat and the sting she had delivered to his pride by her reaction. He eventually gave up looking for a hatch and just lay down on his back, staring up at the stars of the dark night.

"Why the fuck am I so bummed out about this?" he asked himself, pulling his mask off and staring into nothing "She never really cared about me, she was only looking for sex... that's all" Peter took a deep breath and exhaled slowly, allowing the calming sensation to try and unknot his tense muscles and shoo away the sick feeling in his gut.

"Was I looking for a relationship with her?" he asked quietly, resting his hands on his stomach "Or was I just trying to get the same thing she was... fuck man, why the hell am I out here?"

"Good question" a familiar female voice said. He looked up to see the form of Ms. Marvel against the moonlight with her arms folded. Peter didn't try to cover his face, after all, how many people knew who he was now? More than he wanted to and that was still too many.

"Hey Ms. Marvel" he said with a flimsy wave.

"What's the matter Peter?" she asked, floating down to him and sitting down, crossing her legs and looking at him.

"Girl trouble" he shrugged "Stupid mistakes and superhero woes"

"Ah" she said with a smile "I know how that feels"

"You know about girl troubles?" Peter asked, looking up at her with a blank expression.

"If you're talking about losing a girlfriend, then no" she said, tracing a circle in front of her legs on the roof "But if you're talking about period pains, then yes, I am fully aware of those"

"Gross" Peter laughed, placing his hands behind his head as he relaxed his neck again.

"What's the matter with your girlfriend?" she asked.

"I don't have one, I nearly did, but now I don't" Peter said quietly.

"Ah, the ol' 'One that got away story', I know how that goes" Ms. Marvel nodded "What happened?"

"She found out who I was" Peter said solemnly "And then she bolted"

"Really?" Ms. Marvel asked, resting her chin on her hand and raising an eyebrow "Usually most girls love to have a superhero boyfriend, for the first few weeks at least before they get kidnapped or held for ransom by a super villain or-"

"You're not helping" Peter interrupted quickly.

"Right, sorry" Ms. Marvel chuckled "Why'd she bolt?"

"She was disgusted to find out that I'm only fifteen" Peter answered, sitting up and resting an arm on his knee.

"How old was she?" Ms. Marvel asked with a puzzled expression.

"Early, mid-twenties" Peter said "I don't really know to be honest"

"Wow, I would think that any woman that age would be kind of shocked to find out that the guy they were flirting with was barely old enough to grow pubic hair" Ms. Marvel smirked.

"I guess that would upset a good few women" Peter sighed, looking down at the roof he sat on with a heavy expression "How do you know my name anyway?"

"Fury let me read through your file after today, a very interesting read if I might say" Ms. Marvel chuckled.

"Thanks" Peter nodded "I guess"

"Not as good as your father's but entertaining all the same" Ms. Marvel continued. Peter's head shot up at the mention of his father and he narrowed his eyes at the female superhero.

"What d'you mean?" Peter asked.

"Y'know, your father got up to a few antics in his lifetime, everywhere from attempting to play God for a certain loved one, creating a new breed of spiders that would eventually turn you into what you are, to getting into a fistfight with Nick Fury" she smirked "He had a great life"

"What are you talking about?" Peter demanded, moving closer to Ms. Marvel and kneeling in front of her with his hand extended.

"You... you mean you haven't read the file yet?" she asked in a surprised tone "His or your mother's?"

"They have a file on them?" he asked angrily "Why the fuck didn't he tell me? Where are they?"

"They're stored where all the files are; in the S.H.I.E.L.D database in the Triskellion, I'm sure Fury would let you read it if you ask him" Ms. Marvel said "But not now, he's in a meeting with-"

But Peter was already gone.

He had pulled his mask back on as he leaped over the edge of the Triskellion, attaching a web-line to the roof to stop himself from splattering on the floor before rushing through the front entrance. He was allowed, reluctantly though, past security and up to the top floor of the building where he saw Widow and Hawkeye standing outside the briefing room.

"Hi guys" he said as he passed by.

"Yo" Clint waved, placing a hand on Widow's arm as she got up to stop him "Not our problem babe" She stood for a second before sitting back down with a sigh.

"If we get hell for this I'm blaming you" she snapped.

"Sure thing Tash" Clint nodded, not really paying attention as he stared at the Rubik's cube we was attempting to solve.

"You've been at that all night" she said.

"I don't like to leave things unfinished" he shrugged.

"If only you kept that policy when we went to bed" she said grudgingly, crossing her arms and looking away. Clint lowered the Rubik's cube, looking straight at the wall before turning his head to look at her with a bemused expression on his face.

"Really?" he asked in disbelief. Spider-Man went through the automatic doors and walked up to the table where he spotted Celestia and Cadance talking to Fury who was sitting with a mug in his hand with the words 'World's Sexiest Eyepatch' printed on it.

"Fury" Spider-Man said loudly, getting their attention.

"Ah, kid, I was wondering where you'd gotten to" Fury said before looking at the princesses "Can I have a few minutes?"

"Go right ahead" Celestia gestured "Cadance and I can talk for a while" Fury got up and walked over to the shorter superhero, gesturing for the two of them to walk out of earshot.

"What do you need?" he asked.

"Ms. Marvel just told me that you guys have a file on my father" Spider-Man said "I want to know if you'd let me read it? Please?" Fury put a hand to his face, seemingly weighing up the choice before, to Spider-Man's surprise, nodding his head.

"Sure, I'll send you the civilian copy to your email address" Fury nodded "You should have it by tomorrow morning"

"Uh, okay, wow, that was easier than I thought it was gonna be" Spider-Man nodded gratefully "Thanks"

"No problem, now, do you mind coming and talking with the princesses and I?" he asked "I'd like for you to explain why you allowed Max to wreak havoc for as long as he did and when you finally decided to step in why you did such a bad job"

"What?" Spider-Man asked.

"Come on kid" Fury said, clapping Spider-Man on the back and pointing to the table. Spider-Man sighed and moved over to where the table was, taking a seat and placing a hand on the desk.

"Now, Your Majesties, I'd like to formally introduce you to Spider-Man" he said.

"Yo" Spider-Man said, allowing the Y sound to build up as he threw up a gang sign.

"Hi" Cadance said with a grin while Celestia merely smiled.

"Right, as we were discussing earlier, the battle with Max Dillon, caused several million dollars worth of damages to a power plant and to New York's power grid" Fury began "And the man you can blame is sat right across from you, so if you have any mean things to say to him, now's the time"

"Hold the fuck up, I didn't sign up for that" Spider-Man interjected "If you're just gonna be mean I'll fuck off" There was a look of discontent on Celestia's face as Spider-Man spoke and after he'd finished Fury looked at him with his fingers linked underneath his chin.

"You're just enjoying the fact that you can swear like a madman in front of royalty without getting in trouble for it, aren't you?" Fury asked.

"I am loving it" he chuckled.

"Well, I'd ask you to remember that with one easy command I can have your real name, face, date of birth and home number shown to our royal guests and they can take it up with you on their own kid" Spider-Man held out a hand with an extended finger before dropping it down again.

"I really hate you sometimes, you know that?" Spider-Man asked angrily.

"You and half of the country pal" Fury chuckled.

"Wait, you know who he is?" Celestia asked, holding her soft hand out with a sleek finger extended "And you haven't informed me, why?"

"Because I don't have to" Fury shrugged "And as disrespectful as this may sound, the operations of S.H.I.E.L.D and its agents are nothing to do with you"

"Well... I've always appreciated your honesty Director Fury" Celestia said with a roll of her eyes.

"Do we have any grub on the go?" Spider-Man asked.

"We're kind of in the middle of something kid" Fury said.

"Actually, I haven't eaten much today, is there food?" Cadance asked. Celestia looked at her niece with a cold glint in her eye and the pink haired princess shrugged sheepishly.

"Alright, I'll see what the chef can cook up at this hour" Fury said, using a communicator on the desk to talk to others in the building "We can take a break and stretch our legs if you want"

"Awesome" Spider-Man said, jumping out of his chair and sticking to the ceiling, sitting down and looking at the others below him.

"Get down" Fury said.

"I'll meet you half way, can I make a web?" Spider-Man asked.

"Since when could you do that?" Fury asked.

"I don't know if I can, but I sure as hell wanna try" he chuckled.

"Go ahead, just don't break anything while you're up there" Fury said with a wave of his hand.

"Cool" he nodded, using his web-shooters to make the initial strands of web he needed before circling around each line and laying down another strand before lying down on his back and breathing a sigh of relief "Well, that went much better than expected"

"Isn't... isn't someone going to have to clean that up?" Cadance asked.

"No worries, the webbing dissolves after an hour" Spider-Man shrugged, resting a leg on his knee and swinging it to a beat he made by clicking his tongue.

"How?" Cadance asked.

"How what?" Spider-Man asked.

"How does it dissolve?" she asked "Most spider webbing doesn't just dissolve on its own"

"That's because its not real spider's webbing" he said, shooting a web line to the floor and tugging lightly on it "Its a synthetic fibre I developed that resembles spider webbing but over a thousand times more durable" Cadance walked over to the strand of webbing and twanged it with her finger, hearing the deep sound reverberate through the air like a guitar string.

"Wow... you said you made this yourself?" she asked.

"Yep, all by my lonesome" he nodded "I'm quite proud of it too, now, if you'll excuse me I'm gonna have a nap for fifty nine minutes and fifty seconds, don't wanna wake up when this thing gives way, I may still be able to do what a spider can after that but I think my superhero career would suffer, after all, the Wheelchair-Bound Spider-Man doesn't have the ring to it I need"

Crime and Punishment: Teenager Edition

Peter closed the door behind him, locking it as quietly as possible but to no avail.

"Peter Benjamin Parker!" May yelled furiously "Get up here right now!" Peter flinched, half from surprise and half from terror, taking a deep breath before calling back up.

"Gimme a sec!" he said "I just need to write my will" He steeled himself before heading up the stairs, seeing his Aunt May sitting on his bed with a very angry look on her face.

"Where were you last night?" she asked.

"I told you, I was at-"

"Don't lie to me Peter" she interrupted "Tell the truth, where were you?"

"I..." he began, racking his brain as hard as possible to come up with a believable response "I was at a midnight release for a game" May looked at him with a look that told him she wasn't falling for that for a second. She crossed her arms and leaned back against the wall, taking a deep breath before speaking.

"Why are you lying Peter?" she asked "You don't usually lie to me, only these past few weeks you seem to have changed"

"I'm not lying" he lied "Oh yeah, GG Pete"

"I'm going to give you fifteen seconds to tell me where you've been or I'm going to unplug everything in your room and give it to a thrift store" May threatened.

"You... you don't know how half of this stuff connects" Peter objected.

"Then I'll just break it, either way, you lose out" May shrugged "Its not my problem"

"But it was worth hundreds of dollars, you'll only be hurting yourself!" Peter said quickly.

"You're stalling Peter" May interjected "Tell me where you were last night"

"I already said I was at Harry's!" Peter snapped.

"Really?" May said, standing up and holding out her hand in a simple gesture "Because you just said that you were at a video game store, didn't you?"

"Rip" Peter thought in a terrified manner "I..."

"Now that isn't like you at all, the few times you have lied to me before you've been able to keep your stories straight" she said with a victorious grin "Now, are you going to tell me the truth or do I have to start ripping this stuff from the walls?"

"Please don't" he whimpered "They're my babies"

"Then tell the truth" she said simply "Its as easy as that" Peter put a hand to his face, knowing that he'd been backed into a corner and he only had two ways out; the first being to come clean. He could tell his Aunt May about the fact he was Spider-Man, what he'd been doing and how much danger he'd put himself and his family in and she'd probably throw him out, or, he could continue to lie. He could keep spinning her a larger web of lies that would only grow bigger and heavier as the days went on before, as he knew too well, its own weight would cause it to snap and expose every dirty secret Peter Parker had.

So he decided to meet her in the middle and tell a half-truth.

"I was on a blind date" Peter admitted with a sigh, giving the best performance of his life at that moment "And it didn't go well" May was obviously surprised by this revelation, his face giving away an emotion that she hadn't been expecting to encounter in this conversation.

"I... well, I wasn't... what?" she asked in complete shock.

"Some of the guys at the Bugle set me up on a date with a quote-on-quote bombshell of a woman... and I mean woman by the way, she was in her twenties, which I found out when I got there" May sat back down on the bed, crossing one leg over her knee and resting her elbow on it, placing her chin on top of her fist.

"Okay then..." May nodded.

"Any response?" Peter asked with a raised hand.

"I don't really know how I'm supposed to respond to that" May said, linking her fingers and leaning back against the wall "Care to give me some ideas?"

"How about 'That's okay Peter, I know you're feeling burnt out and extremely emasculated by your humiliation last night and because of that I'm not going to punish you for sneaking out and lying to me'?" Peter suggested. May looked at him with a raised eyebrow before responding.

"I could say that but I've got a better one 'I know you're feeling burnt out and extremely emasculated by your humiliation last night and to hit that point home you're scrubbing the kitchen and the bathroom down', I like that one better, what about you?" Peter's jaw dropped in horror at the task he was being given and he knew that no one had even attempted to scrub the bathroom down for two years and the kitchen was a hell zone full of empty bottles, ruptured bottles of cleaning solution and grime in almost every orifice that wasn't usually seen by the regular day to day activities they had in there.

"It doesn't really matter what I think, does it?" Peter asked in a hopeless manner. May stood up and ruffled his hair with a chuckle.

"Of course it doesn't honey, now get to work" she said with a genuinely happy smile on her face "I'll check in on you every few hours to make sure you're doing a good job"

"How about every few minutes to make sure I don't drink bleach?" Peter asked, causing his Aunt to laugh as she walked out of the room.

"That seems fair enough" she smiled "Just don't use the expensive stuff, it costs and arm and a leg to replace"

"You'd think your nephew would be worth more than a bottle of bleach wouldn't you?" Peter called after her. She stopped in the doorway and turned around, leaning on the frame with a smile on her face.

"Yeah, you would wouldn't you?" was all she said before leaving and going downstairs. Peter stood in his room speechless before opening his mouth and hollering the first thing that came out of his mouth.

"You heathen!"

The Old Buzzard

Peter had spent the last two hours of his morning battling the grim demons that inhabited the area behind the fridge with a single spot that refused to be cleaned.

"This is such bullshit" he growled quietly "I think I need to re-fit the web-shooters to be able to spray cleaning solution and then have some kind of compressed aerosol can that can blast the grime off instead of having to spend half and hour scrubbing the same fucking spot!" He had finished the bathroom a few hours ago after taking the shower head apart and soaking each part in lime scale removal liquid before moving on to other, equally as taxing cleaning jobs.

"I swear, I'd rather go another five rounds with Electro then do this shit any more" he growled "At least I could make a few jokes about Maximillion the Fourth every now and again, I mean have you tried to have playful banter with grease and grout? 'Hey there lime-scale, its your time-scale! To be defeated! Muahahaha!" Peter's eyes widened and he sat down on the floor, dropping the brush he was using to scrub the back of the fridge and felt stunned.

"That was the worst thing I have every said in my life" he said, stunned at the fact he could even think up a line that bad "I think I just jumped back to nineteen sixty two comic book one-liners with how shit that was. I think I might need to make a paedophilia joke to feel less guilty about that one"

"Peter? You nearly done in there?" May asked, sticking her head into the kitchen and looking around with a judgemental expression "Huh"

"'Huh'? I've been working my ass for all day and the best thing you can say is 'huh'?" Peter asked irritably "That is so unappreciative!" May then looked at her nephew with a very bemused expression, conveying exactly what she was thinking to him, the reaction not being lost on Peter.

"Holy hell" he said, his eyes widening in horror "I know exactly how you feel now"

"Yeah, it sucks doesn't it?" May asked "Teenagers are very disrespectful to their carers"

"Can I give you a hug and say sorry?" Peter asked, standing up and holding his arms out.

"Ew, no! You are covered in grime and filth!" May exclaimed in disgust.

"Come here and give me a hug" Peter grinned.

"Get back!" May sad, grabbing an umbrella from the large pot in the mouth of the kitchen and jabbing at Peter with it. The two fenced playfully for a few minutes before Peter's phone went off. He answered the call, this time from Harry to be greeted by an extremely loud exploding sound.

"Jesus!" Peter shrieked, nearly throwing his phone into the wall in sheer terror. The sound suddenly came to an end and was replaced by hysterical laughter from Harry.

"Yeah, yeah, laugh it up you asswipe" Peter growled "Beside giving me a heart attack and a burst eardrum is there any reason you called me?"

"Yeah, sorry, I just learned how to use sound bites from a soundboard during a call and thought I'd try it out on my bestest pal in the world" Harry chuckled.

"I'm going to beat you senseless when I get a hold of you" Peter growled.

"Whatever brah, anyway, I was wondering if you wanna come to the Oscorp building to see the debate between Toomes and my Dad over who owns the rights to the new Flyte-Gear tech we're building?" Harry asked "Maybe get a few pictures for the Bugle?"

"Sure... is it actually Oscorp tech originally?" Peter asked "Between you and me"

"Fuck no" Harry laughed "But we've erased enough of our under-the-table deals to make sure it looks like its ours"

"That's really dirty" Peter nodded "I like it"

"Well you know how the saying goes; 'Nice guys finish last'" Harry agreed "So you up for it?" Peter looked at his Aunt May who, after looking over the kitchen for a few moments, nodded at him.

"You can go" she nodded.

"I've been given the green light and I am good to go" Peter grinned, giving her a thumbs up sign "I'll see you in about half an hour"


Peter tapped Harry on the back as he walked up behind him, making sure that the shoulder he tapped wouldn't be the same side of Harry he stood on when he stopped. The two of them were stood in a large conference hall on the upper ledge, looking down at the heated argument between Norman Osborn and the bald, old man who peter guessed was Toomes. Harry turned around to the wrong side while Peter leaned on the railing with a grin on his face.

"Asshole" Harry grunted as he turned the other way to look at Peter, causing his friend to laugh. Harry rolled his eyes before lightly shoving his friend in a joking manner.

"I was wondering when you'd show up" Harry said, looking down at his father who was keeping his calm in the discussion while Toomes seemed to be losing his mind "What took you so long?"

"I don't look like this without trying" Peter said, performing an exaggerated twirl before striking a pose. Harry cocked an eyebrow before laughing to himself.

"And if that's what effort makes you look like then I'd hate to see what you fresh out of bed looks like" Harry said, poking fun at his friend.

"Ask your mom, she'll tell you" Peter poked back.

"You wish"

"...Yeah, I do actually" Peter grinned.

"Alright, shut up now" Harry said quickly with an angry touch in his voice.

"That pisses you off so much" Peter laughed.

"Its because I don't like the thought of my mother sleeping with people" Harry growled, crossing his arms.

"I do, especially with me" Peter said, pushing his friend to see how far he could get.

"I'm going to hit you if you say anything like that one more time" Harry snapped "And be warned, it will hurt"

"Funny" Peter said, trying his best not to laugh mid-sentence "That's exactly what I told your-"

"Think about whether that joke's gonna be worth a broken nose Peter" Harry said sternly "Really think about it" Peter mockingly rubbed a hand over his chin, trying to give his best over the top contemplation gesture he could before shaking his head.

"Nah, I'm too handsome to have a busted nose" Peter shrugged, turning back to the argument "So what's going on?" Harry seemed relieved about the change of subject and began to explain what the debate was about.

"Well, as I told you over the phone, this little conversation-slash-debate is about the rights to produce, and sell, our Flyte-Gear" Harry said "I've shown one of the projects to you before, the Ares Glider that you and Twilight made fun of, that little device uses the same tech that we're trying to patent ahead of the old fossil down there"

"Sounds boring" Peter shrugged "You catch the new episode of The Walking Dead yet?"

"Peter, can we be serious for a second?" Harry asked begrudgingly "We can talk about our nerdisms later, Dad's just about won the crowd over and the lawyers seem to be buying our side of the story, the real side of the story that is"

"Of course" Peter nodded, listening in on the debate.

"As I've told you well over forty times Toomes, my company developed the base idea for Flyte-Gear in the late nineties when Otto here, myself and an old colleague of ours were spit-balling ideas in a boardroom and we came up with the idea this technology"

"Mr Osborn sir, you've spoken about yourself and Doctor Octavius but you've failed to mention this third colleague at all, where does he stand in this battle for the right to sell this technology?" a reporter asked, holding out her microphone to Osborn's podium.

"That colleague was a good friend of mine by the name of Richard Parker who, sadly, is no longer with us" Osborn said, a hint of genuine sadness in his voice "But if he were still here he would be able to lend his knowledge and memories of our discussion that night, along with my own and Otto's" The journalists gathered made note of this while Harry clapped Peter on the back and nodded at him with a smirk.

"Turns out your dad was in on the project... seems weird for Dad to name drop your old man on this specific job" Harry said with a curious expression.

"Yeah, seeing as how, going on my Uncle's stories, my Dad was a biologist, not a physicist" Peter nodded "Why would he use my Dad as an accomplice... maybe because nobody can find him and ask him what actually happened"

"You... you alright talking about this?" Harry asked in a surprised tone.

"Huh? Yeah I'm fine, my parents have been dead for nearly a decade and I can barely remember enough about them to be in tears every time I think about it... I'm sad they're not around but I don't cry every time they're brought up" Peter shrugged "Even though..." Harry turned his head to look at his friend with a puzzled look on his face.

"Even though?" he asked "Even though what?"

"...Nah, it doesn't matter, just thinking out loud" Peter said with a shake of his head.

"Well, if it is something you wanna talk about just remember I'm here for you man" Harry said, patting his friend on the shoulder with a grin.

"Thanks dude" Peter smiled back "I'm good for now"

"Now, Mr Toomes, if you're still willing to claim that the idea was yours to begin with then I'll be more than happy to take you to court and prove that this invention belongs to Dr Octavius, Dr Parker and myself, so you can sign on your lawyer and we'll bring it to the courthouse" Norman said with a sigh "And we can both present our evidence and, upon the judge's decision, I can put this matter behind me and allow my company's wholly-owned technology to be sold on the market to those who wish to buy it, without the interference of you and your... business ventures" Toomes glared furiously at Osborn, both of them fully aware that he would be unable to hire a lawyer as good as Osborn's to defend his honour and prove himself to be the original genius behind the design.

He grabbed hold of the sides of his padium and gritted his teeth, his eyes sending daggers at the confident-looking billionaire who merely remained silent, waiting for the older man's response.

"This isn't over Osborn" he spat.

"I'm afraid it is Mr Toomes, now can you please leave before I have security escort you from the building?" Osborn asked "Our designated time for this discussion is over and I'd prefer if you left on your own terms, to save you from the humiliation"

"You'll... you'll regret this" Toomes growled angrily, walking away from his podium and closer to Osborn "I swear on my mother's grave I'll make you pay for this with your blood!"

"Security!" Osborn called out "Can you please this old, washed-up buzzard off my property and, to do me a favour, make sure he doesn't get lost on the way out, I know that walls of success can be dazzling and somewhat confusing to the old and fallen like himself" At this point three huge men wearing black T-Shirts and black, reflective sunglasses walked out from behind the stage and dragged Toomes away.

"Osborn!" Toomes bellowed "I'll see you burned for this"

"Yes, of course you will my friend" Osborn chuckled, wiping his nails on his thousand-dollar suit jacket "Now, does anyone else have any more questions?"

A Fantastic Meeting

Peter and Harry had decided to take a break from their extremely tiring routine of standing around talking and had ended up sitting around talking in the cafeteria of the Oscorp tower as they had when showing the royals and Twilight around.

"So, it seems like Mr Toomes isn't too happy with your dad" Peter said, sipping his drink through a straw.

"Yes it does, but hey, its dog-eat-dog in the business world" Harry shrugged, biting into a sandwich after finishing his sentence "And besides, I don't think Toomes is gonna do anything about it besides cry and maybe go a little senile"

"You say that as if going senile is something people choose to do" Peter commented.

"How do we know it isn't?" Harry asked with a very serious expression on his face "Maybe dementia is something old people get when they become so old that they just want to forget the fun of being young and they create it as a method to cope with not being young and spry any more" Peter looked at his friend with an amazed expression, seconds ticking by before Peter spoke in a slow tone.

"That has to be... the single most retarded thing I have ever heard you, fuck that, anyone say in my entire life" he said, half shocked and half amazed.

"Yes, but you have to give me props for it" Harry said with his hand up in front of him "You don't know how much effort goes into being as retarded as I am" Peter took another sip of his drink before setting it down and getting up out of his seat.

"No, no, nope, fuck that, I'm done" he said, waving his hands in front of him "I am done, I will call you after you've mentally tortured your girlfriend tonight and see if you're functioning properly"

"What?" Harry asked with a cocked eyebrow "It wasn't that bad was it?"

"Harry, get your head checked brah" Peter said, exiting the room and walking over to the elevator. He walked into the mechanical lifting device and thumbed a button. The doors began to close before he heard a nasally voice call out.

"Hold that lift please!" they yelled. He quickly darted forward and hit the open button and the doors slid back open, allowing the slightly taller scientist wearing thin, circular glasses and carrying several large boxes rush inside.

"Thank you" the man said with a wimpy smile.

"No problem..." Peter said, looking at his name tag "Doctor Octavius" The man smiled at him once more before turning to Peter again with a request.

"Floor three please" he said.

"Sure" Peter nodded, thumbing the green button with a large 3 printed on it, the doors sliding closed once again before a tall, confident man stopped the door, activating the sensor that caused it to open again. He was a large man who walked with importance, carrying an expensive looking black briefcase and a slicked back black haircut, contrasting greatly to the nerdy looking, rough-haired Otto.

"Floor three" the man said, ordering instead of requesting.

"What's the magic word?" Peter asked mockingly.

"Floor three" the man repeated.

"Just ask nicely" Otto said with a playful grin. This look was not appreciated by the man in the suit as he pushed his face close to Otto's, giving him a furious glare.

"Did I ask you to intervene Octavius?" the man demanded.

"N-No Doctor Smythe" Otto muttered "I was only joking-"

"Don't joke with your superiors Octavius, we don't pay you to make friends" Smythe said, pushing a finger into Octavius's chest and pushing him back against the elevator wall "Actually, I don't know what we pay you for to be honest, when my research is complete you and your AI constructs will be obsolete"

"And what do you research Smythe?" Peter said, grabbing hold of Smythe's arm with a firm grip, getting the taller man to glare at him threateningly "'Cause from my knowledge, Oscorp doesn't do research into the 'secret inner workings of the egotistical jackass'" Smythe exhaled through his nose before looking Peter up and down.

"I'm sorry kid, who do you think you're supposed to be?" he asked, baring his teeth.

"Peter, Peter Parker" he answered "I would say its a pleasure but I think the only pleasure I'd get from this encounter would be you getting out of this elevator" Smythe seemed taken aback by his response, moving away from Peter and as such the teen released his grasp.

"Parker huh?" he asked "I heard a lot about your father"

"Really?" Peter asked with a cocked eyebrow "What exactly did you here about my father?"

"I heard that your father was a great man" Smythe said "I can see that the apple does indeed fall far from the tree" The elevator doors slid shut behind them and the elevator began to descend, leaving an awkward silence as Smythe and Peter stood staring furiously at each other until the door opened at the third floor. The doors opened and Smythe looked behind him.

"My stop" he announced.

"Please" Peter said "Don't delay" Smythe exhaled sharply before departing the elevator, Octavius seemingly waiting for a larger gap to grow between the two of them before turning to Peter.

"Thanks for that, what you did just now" he said.

"Don't mention it" Peter said in a friendly tone "I hate assholes like him"

"Yeah, but I could never say that to his face" Otto sighed, sorting out his lab coat before looking out of the elevator "I'm surprised you stood up to him like that, I'd be scared of crossing him"

"How come?" Peter asked.

"He's got a lot of powerful friends" Otto answered.

"So do I" Peter shrugged "See you round Doctor Octavius"

"Yeah, see you around Mister Parker" Otto nodded before departing the elevator. The doors slid closed again before the elevator descended down to the first floor, allowing Peter to exit the elevator and then the building, his temper still flaring slightly after the encounter with Smythe.


"Right" Spider-Man said, landing on the side of a truck and sticking to it, scratching his chin as he rode the vehicle down the street "I've run into two stolen Iron Man suits in the space of two weeks and I've only been doing this superhero schtick for two months now... that's a rogue-slash-stolen suit once a month and my normal person sense is telling me that isn't normal" He threw himself forward and hopped across two cars before throwing himself high into the air and landing on a flagpole.

"I need to go see Monsieur Stark and ask him what the low-down is on the suits goin' all crizzle" he said to himself, shooting a web onto a nearby building and swinging off it "Snoop-Man away!" He swung around a corner, firing another web-line higher than before and yanking up on it in an effort to gain more height before his phone began to ring in his backpack.

"Ugh, I need to get a hands-free" he growled, landing on a nearby rooftop after a quick angle change, taking his phone out of his bag "Yello?"

"Parker!" Jameson barked, Peter once again having the phone too close to his ear "Where are you?"

"Midtown" Spider-Man answered, pulling the mask up over his mouth to not muffle his voice whilst dropping his Manhattan accent.

"Why?" Jameson asked quietly.

"Why not?" Peter responded.

"Because I'm damn sure I'm paying to take pictures of the FF's return to New York, am I not?" Jameson barked.

"Two things boss, firstly, I don't know who the 'FF' are, and secondly, you're not paying me to do anything except take pictures of Spider-Man, why the sudden change of career path for me?" Spider-Man asked.

"You and that Witcher girl-" Jameson began.

"Watson" Peter corrected.

"That's what I said, that Widdicombe girl-"

Peter sighed loudly.

"Did a pretty good spread on the attack those military guys and Spider-Man did on the tourist day thing the army held" Jameson explained.

"Great use of the correct terminology there JJ, really shows off that first-class journalist training" Spider-Man said before realizing what Jameson had said "And why are you blaming Spider-Man for that?! He saved people!"

"No, Ms. Marvel saved people, that masked menace just distracted her and ended up getting two people killed!" Jameson barked "I'm not paying you to argue with me boy!"

"Once again, you're not paying me to do anything besides take pictures of Spider-Man... and who the hell are the FF?" Spider-Man asked, remembering his original question.

"The Fantastic Four boy, god damn, have you been living under a rock for the past five years!?" Jameson demanded.

"No, a locker mostly" Spider-Man shrugged.

"I... what?" Jameson asked in a confused tone "Never mind that, just get to the Baxter Building and get pictures, I'm sending that Watcher girl over there too, since you two seem to work well together"

"Are you even trying at this point?" Spider-Man asked.

"Whatever Parker, just get to the Baxter Building in less than ten minutes or I'll have you strung up by that poncy little haircut faster than you can say 'Ow my hair'!" Jameson hissed.

"Wow Boss, that was nowhere near as creative as usual, rough work day?" Spider-Man asked.

"Wife's been at me, preparing for my boy coming home from his space-flight" Jameson said, strangely revealing a warmer side of himself before stamping down on it again "Enough questions, what do you think I'm paying you to do right now!?"

"That's a multiple choice question right?" Spider-Man asked.

This ended the phone call.

Spider-man stared at his phone in amazement for a brief second before pulling his mask back down and shaking his head.

"That guy has a son?" he asked himself "That guy has a wife?"


Peter tapped Mary-Jane on the shoulder just as he stuffed the rest of his mask into his pocket, causing the red-head to jump again.

"Why, how, do you keep doing that?" she demanded angrily, placing a hand over her heart and exhaling angrily.

"That's my mutant power" Peter shrugged, looking down the corridor they were in and setting his eyes on the elevator that lead up to the penthouse that the Fantastic Four were staying in while in New York "The X-Men wanted me to join them under the moniker 'Red-Headius Sneakio'upon'"

"Very funny" Mary-Jane sighed "Have you got your camera?"

"Does the Pope shit in the woods?" Peter asked in response.

"No" Mary-Jane said sternly.

"Jesus, you're going to be fun to talk to" Peter said with a fake grimace "You feeling alright?"

"No, I'm stressed all to hell" she sighed, rubbing her temples with her fingers.

"Three breaths, inhale for three seconds, hold and release" Peter instructed. Mary-Jane followed the instructions before scowling angrily at him.

"That didn't help" she sighed.

"Didn't think it would, I just wanted to try out my experiment to see whether or not people will follow any advice that sounds relatively medical-esque" Peter shrugged "I think you and I have just broken new medical ground Ms. Watson"

"I'm gonna punch you in the face in a minute" she growled.

"Awesome, then you can try your bullshit witchdoctor method to help stop me bleeding" Peter grinned.

"I don't have one" Mary-Jane snarled.

"Well, you came to this experiment prepared didn't you?" Peter asked in a mock snooty tone. Mary-Jane stared at him in angered amazement before there came an announcement from the end of the corridor where a big man in a black suit stood.

"You two?" he asked "The team's ready for you"

"Awesome, I can't wait to meet these guys" Peter said, rubbing his hands together "I'm gonna get an autograph from Sue Storm and sell it on Ebay for about a thousand dollars"

"You're joking right?" Mary-Jane asked in a worried tone.

"Of course I'm joking" Peter chuckled before growing serious "I'll get one from Reed, he's worth more geek street cred"

"I swear right now, if you do anything besides take pictures when I tell you to I'm throwing you out of the penthouse window" Mary-Jane threatened.

"Awesome, then maybe I can try out the new panoramic photo setting on my camera, I heard roof shots of the Baxter Building make lovely canvas spreads" Peter grinned. Mary-Jane didn't respond, she instead turned her head and practised her best fake smile, attacked her hair with a comb from her pocket for a few seconds and took a deep breath.

"I'm ready" she said to herself.

"Is my stunt double done in make-up yet?" Peter asked the air behind him "I heard they had to put a lot of prosthetics on him to get him to look as gorgeous as me"

Mary-Jane walked away from him quickly.

"Alright, I'll stop it" Peter grinned, following behind her. The two of them showed their Daily Bugle ID cards and the doorman let them into the elevator. Mary-Jane thumbed the button for the penthouse and took another deep breath.

"You seem nervous" Peter said, not looking at her as he spoke.

"Really?" she snapped "What gave it away?"

"You don't look as gorgeous as usual" Peter commented. The angry retort Mary-Jane had brewed died away after Peter's response, a surprised look appearing on her face.

"You... you think I'm gorgeous?" she asked.

"Of course I do, my brain knows three things, video games, food and pretty girls" Peter grinned. Mary-Jane seemed to calm down after the compliment, her nerves seemingly dying down and her usual attitude coming back to life.

"Well... I'm flattered Tiger" she said "You're not too shabby yourself"

"My Aunt tells me I'd be beautiful if I was older" Peter said "And if I was good-looking"

"She undersells you Petey" Mary-Jane said, patting him on the shoulder.

"Don't mention selling, she tried to do that once and it did not go well" Peter said, shuddering.

"You... you're joking, right?" Mary-Jane asked.

"Of course I'm joking" Peter nodded "She really wanted to just give me away" The doors opened and the two of them looked at each other with nervous grins.

"Wish me luck" Mary-Jane said "You can take a few establishing shots if they'll let you"

"Good luck" Peter nodded, walking out of the elevator only to have his Spider-Sense flare up. He lifted up his hand just as a baseball came flying towards his head. He caught it in the flat of his palm and closed his hands around it, transferring it to his other hand and hissing in pain from the catch.

"Whoa buddy, good reflexes" a cocky voice said from across the room "I expected to have to dig that thing out of your skull"

"Johnny!" a female voice snapped furiously "Get over here and behave"

"Come on Sue, I didn't mean to" Johnny said with a grin. The teen stood up, being about two inches taller than Peter, putting him at five-nine with spiked, nearly white hair, and bright blue eyes. He wore a simple black T-Shirt and blue jeans with black converses on his feet.

"You're not mad are you bro?" Johnny asked Peter "I didn't mean to throw it at you, I was throwing it up and catching it with a swipe but I kinda fucked it up"

"I know how you feel, palming a baseball stings like a mother fucker" Peter nodded, throwing the baseball back over to him "Especially when it hits the joints and not the flesh, makes it really sensitive for the rest of the day"

"Tell me about it man... you a big sports guy?" Johnny asked. Peter walked over to him and sat down on the desk next to him.

"About as much as you can be when you're getting shoved into lockers by the team" Peter chuckled "I still think if water boy and bench warmer are unofficial members of the team I should at least get credited for their shoving skills, I've trained that team as best I could" Johnny chuckled before holding out his hand with a grin.

"Johnny Storm" he said.

"Peter Parker" Peter nodded, shaking his hand.

"Right, over there is my ever-ageing sister with a permanent chip on her shoulder" Johnny said, waving a hand at Sue Storm who was hunched over a desk with a blow-torch and welder's mask in use "The living rockslide is somewhere on the deck, probably trying to communicate with the pebbles Sue set up to make a shitty little garden outside and the main man, Mr Reed Richards, is around the other side of the elevator doin' some sciencey mumbo-jumbo"

"Watch your language Johnny, and I'd like to remind you that my husband's work is very important and not some 'sciencey mumbo-jumbo'" Sue said sternly.

"Of course it is sis, like the time he tried to figure out how to make your wedding ring stay visible when you change so that people can still see you're married" Johnny chuckled.

"That's because Reed is a very protective man, he likes others to know that I'm his wife and we're in love" Sue said.

"Is it really?" Johnny asked mockingly "I think you need to learn the difference between protective and insecure" Sue swirled around in here chair and pulled up the welder's mask, ready to snap back at Johnny before noticing Peter sitting next to him.

"... I know you" she said, standing up, revealing that she was wearing her Fantastic Four uniform. The white-lined, blue suit was as iconic itself as the orange and blue 4 on her chest, her long blonde hair flowing down to her mid-back with her bright blue eyes being a feature she shared with her little brother.

"Why do I know you?" she asked, walking over to Peter and staring intently at him.

"I... I have no idea, I don't know you personally" Peter said, holding up his hands "You're supposed to be talking to my red-headed friend over there" Sue turned her head to look at Mary-Jane who was standing with an extremely nervous expression on her face.

"Oh!" Sue said, putting a hand to her mouth in shock "You must be Mary-Jane Watson, your boss called ahead and told us you'd be coming... but he never mentioned your friend" Sue walked over to Mary-Jane and shook her hand with a smile.

"Sorry to make you wait like that and have to listen to the boys talk for so long" she said.

"Its alright, I usually have to put up with Pete's babbling a lot of the time" Mary-Jane chuckled "He's a fun guy to be around when he wants to be, but he has his days"

"I am standing right here you know?" Peter asked, waving his hands wildly.

"I know, that's why I said it" Mary-Jane said, sticking out her tongue playfully. Sue chuckled quietly before holding up a hand to Mary-Jane.

"Now, wait right here while I go fetch my darling husband" she said with a nod. Sue ducked off, leaving the three teenagers alone in the room together.

"Johnny my friend, I am sure you do remember how to blink don't you?" Peter asked, clapping a hand on his own leg, noticing the way Johnny was eyeing up Mary-Jane.

"Indeed I am, but why would I want to?" Johnny asked in response, grinning widely "She's not your girlfriend is she?"

"Nope" Peter said, getting up onto his feet and looking around the room.

"Go ahead, investigate" Johnny said with a sweeping gesture "Just don't touch"

"Is that a rule you usually follow yourself Johnny?" Peter asked with a smirk.

"Is it fuck" he laughed.

"You know what, I think you and I are going to get along brilliantly" Peter chuckled.

"I hope so, you seem like a cool guy" Johnny said, cracking his knuckles before looking at Mary-Jane "So... Mary-Jane wasn't it"

"Don't bother" Mary-Jane chuckled "I'm not the dating kind"

"Are you sure?" Johnny asked "I can't change your mind?" Mary-Jane leaned against a wall, her usual confident and playful attitude now back in full force.

"Maybe, maybe not" she shrugged "It depends how you play your cards"

"I'm good with cards" Johnny smiled.

"We'll have to wait and see, won't we?" Mary-Jane sighed. Peter chuckled to himself before wandering off into the room, trying to get a look at what Sue had been welding. He leaned over the desk and took a look at it, seeing that the weld was complete and that it was some kind of thick, mechanical armband.

"Huh" he said sitting down and looking at it "I've seen one of these before..." He picked up the object an noticed that the wiring was incomplete and that there was a chip missing from the motherboard inside the armband.

"I think... I think this is retro-refitted, or at least, redesigned Stark Technology that he uses in the Iron Man armour" Peter said, lowering his gaze to the table "But its a kind that's not officially endorsed and... can be sold on the street" Peter's eyes shot up as he heard Sue talking to someone as she walked back into the room.

"Here you go Ms. Watson, I'm sure we can begin our interview now that Mr Fantastic is here" Sue said with a grin. Reed looked at Mary-Jane and smiled before his eyes travelled over to Peter who was still tinkering with the armband, now realizing it was a gauntlet that was designed to hold the circuitry for the flight stabilizer-slash-repulsor module Tony had invented for the Iron Man armour.

"Good god... I didn't think I'd ever see you again" Reed said, moving quickly over to Peter who set the gauntlet down as reed reached the table. He held up his hands in surrender and stood up from the table.

"I wasn't trying to pocket it or anything Mr Richards I swear!" Peter exclaimed "I was only having a-"

"Peter... is that you?" he asked with a nostalgic tone in his voice.

"Y-Yeah... how do you know my name?" Peter asked.

"I knew I recognized him from somewhere!" Sue exclaimed, snapping her fingers "Sure his hair's different and he's grown a few feet but I had a feeling that this was the same little tyke who smashed my mother's old vase!"

"What?" Peter exclaimed "What the hell are you talking about?!"

"What she means is that we, meaning Sue and myself, knew you when you were a child, more accurately, we knew your father when he used to bring you in for days when your babysitter was busy, thus explaining you smashing the vase when your dad brought you along to Sue's parents old house for a family dinner, your mother, father and you" Reed explained "Your father was my teacher, he was the first man who gave me a chance in the fields of science, more specifically mechanical engineering, and brought me on board his study team when I was... eighteen I think"

"You... you both knew my father?" Peter asked "You worked with my father?"

"Not with Peter, for, your father, god rest his soul, was one of the best minds this world had ever seen and from what I've read in his research notes he was close to a breakthrough that would revolutionize the way medical, hell, biological science would operate" Reed said "His work with Osborn into biological engineering, a better example being his work on genetic manipulations, was a field that was previously untapped before and up until his death he and Osborn were on the path to success"

Peter stared at the older scientist with a bewildered look, running his hands through his hair before throwing them out in front of him.

"What the hell are you talking about?!" he demanded.

"Your father was days away from being able to, with the assistance of already-existing codes, rewrite the genetic structure of human beings!" Reed said with a wide smile. Peter looked at the scientist with a blank expression before looking at his wife who merely placed a hand on Reed's shoulder and took a deep breath.

"Reed's a little over excited at seeing you're still here, as you can tell, and what he wants to ask you is if your father left anything behind that would help finalize his research into genetic recoding?" Sue said.

"Yes, basically that" Reed said with a sheepish nod, scratching the back of his greying brown hair.

"No, sorry, but my father never left any of his research at home, it was all still at Oscorp, according to my Aunt May that is" Peter said with a shake of his head.

"Damn" Reed said with a sigh.

"Oh well" Sue said "I know you don't remember either of us but I just want to say, its great to see you again Peter"

"Uhhh, thanks... I guess" Peter said, smiling at the two of them before his phone went off in his pocket. Peter looked at the caller ID to see that it was Twilight.

"Can I just take this quickly?" he asked.

"No, go ahead" Reed said "We'll get started with the interview with Mary-Jane if you don't mind?" Peter gave a thumbs up sign before standing up and walking over to a quiet corner of the room, seeing the Thing bench-pressing a large wardrobe outside on the balcony, and answering the call.

"Hello?" Peter asked.

"Yeah, hi Peter... can I ask you a question?" she asked.

"Go ahead" Peter nodded.

"Um... how are you with birds?" she asked in a nervous tone.

"What?" Peter said in a puzzled manner.

"Specifically Vultures?" she asked.

"What's this about?" Peter sighed.

"Help" was all she mumbled.

Bailouts 2: Electric Boogaloo.

Peter stuffed his phone into his pocket and made his way towards the area where the interview was taking place. He knocked on the wall next to them and they turned to look at him.

"I need to go for a while, that's not a problem is it?" Peter asked Mary-Jane.

"Uh, yeah Petey, it kinda is" Mary-Jane said with an awkward expression on her face "We need the pictures throughout the interview" Peter put a hand to his face and sighed, now faced with a dilemma. He needed to go take care of the problem Twilight had told him about, this obviously being the more important event to take care of, but by doing so he'd have to abandon Mary-Jane and end up losing a paycheck on the photos he was supposed to take for Jameson which was something he wanted to avoid doing.

"I'll just take a few quickly now and then I need to go" Peter sighed, snapping a few quick shots of the room and the team, knowing that they weren't very good ones before dropping his camera back down by his side and heading back to the elevator.

"Peter!" Mary-Jane snapped "What the hell is so important that you need to leave now?" Peter paused for a second, staring at the elevator door as it opened before answering.

"Birds" he said, ducking into the elevator and jabbing a button with his thumb. The doors closed and the elevator began to lower, leaving Mary-Jane on her own with the team.

"What's his problem?" Johnny asked "Seems like kind of a dick move to leave now, and why did he say he was going? Birds or something like that right?"

"I... I don't know" Mary-Jane sighed, putting a hand to her face "Look, I'm really sorry about this... can we just continue with the interview, minus the photographer"

"Sure, where were we?" Sue asked, very willing to move past the awkward moment and carry on with the planned afternoon.


"Birds?" Spider-Man snapped angrily, flinging himself down the street with quick web after quick web, pushing his swinging speeds to the limit in an attempt to get to the Oscorp building where Twilight had said this 'Vulture' guy was flying around, apparently attacking Norman Osborn's office.

"Why the fuck did I use birds as an excuse?" he growled "I could've said anything else, literally anything and it would've been a better excuse, 'I need the bathroom' or 'Family problems' or even 'Sorry MJ, my fucking camera's just died and I left the SD card back at home, I'll be about half an hour and then we can get back to work'... what the fuck is wrong with me?!"

He swung around the side of a building just in time to have a strange whirring noise get his attention, coming from several metres in front of him.

"Osborn!" a furious and familiar voice yelled. Spider-Man looked down at the street to see a black stretch limo gunning it through the traffic as a strange man dressed in a black, metallic suit with even stranger wings underneath his arms flying after the car.

"Well... this wasn't something I was expecting when I woke up today" Spider-Man said in a surprised tone "Maybe if I set my camera to record I can get us all on 'America's Wildest Car Chases' tonight... never mind, he's moving too fast" Then the realization hit him like a train. This Vulture thing, which is who he guessed it was, wasn't going to be caught on camera at any angle because no matter where he stuck his camera he would be gone before the flash even went off.

"Son of a bitch!" he yelled, dropping down lower to try and catch up with the Vulture "I'm not just losing money on the actual fucking job I've got, I've just been screwed out of getting shots of Spidey Vs. The Manic Mental Patient in a Flight Suit... Jesus Christ, could this get any worse today?"

Yes, yes it could.

It was at this moment his phone went off in his bag, the ringtone being barely audible but audible nonetheless.

"God dammit, why now?" he demanded angrily, dropping his bag onto his arm and trying his best to work a way out to open the bag without dropping it, retrieve his phone without dropping it, and put the bag back on his shoulders, closed and secured, all without dropping it.

"Hello?" he asked.

"Hi there, Peter this is Mrs Sparkle here" a familiar voice said.

"Oh... hi, what can I do you for?" he asked, using his free hand to web after the Vulture as fast as possible.

"Osborn, stop the damn car!" the old man bellowed.

"I'm just calling to say that your Aunt May had a bit of an accident at work today, nothing life threatening, but she might've broken her arm after she fell down the stairs" Worry shot through Peter's system, his anxiety on several different subjects shooting through him and acting as a very sharp shock.

"What?!" he demanded "Is she alright? how did it happen? Where is she now? Can I talk to her?"

"She's alright now, we're lucky she was at work when it happened, and we have one of the senior doctors looking at her" Mrs Sparkle said in a calming manner "But if her arm is broken she might be out of action for a few weeks"

"Oh great... that'll really help the bills go down" Spider-Man sighed before catching himself "Sorry, that sounds really bad"

"Don't worry, its perfectly normal... you guys are still struggling aren't you?" she asked in a soft tone.

"Yeah..." Spider-Man said. At this point he was able to see the Vulture now ramming into different cars, causing them to veer to the side and create quite a large amount of damage to themselves and the surrounding area.

"Look Mrs Sparkle, I'm gonna have to call you back, I'm a little tied up at the second here" Spider-Man grunted, dropping lower down as he tried to gain more ground on the Vulture "I'm kinda watching the company bird right now and he is not happy"

"Oh, well if its that important I'll call you later shall I?" she asked.

"That'd be great" Spider-Man nodded "Thanks for calling me, bye now"" Spider-Man hung up the phone and stuffed it into his bag again, having to once again dance around to perform what should've been a simple task.

"Alright birdy, time for me to clip those wings of yours" Spider-Man said, grunting as he lashed forward on his web and managed to get a better look at the Vulture "This guy doesn't seem too tough... I should be able to just-" He was silenced by the sound of an alarm blaring loudly, forcing him to release his web and heave himself back to where a small-time jewellery store was being robbed.

"Oh for fuck's sake" he sighed, looking back at the rapidly disappearing Vulture and then back at the robbery in progress "Can't the right decision ever be easy?"

No. No it can't.

Quick and Dirty (Here's a fucking title, have I appeased you yet PokeSEGA64?)

With a quick leap, Spider-Man was inside the jewellery the store and staring at a large man wearing brown pants and a two tone striped green shirt. The man stood at about six foot five with a hulking frame and short brown hair, a strong jawline that held up brutish figures and a nose that looked as if it had been broken several times.

"Alright pal, I wanna see those hands in the air!" Spider-Man said "And then I want you to drop, pop and lock it!" The man moved his head to look at Spider-Man before fear exploded onto his face. He turned his body to face him, pointing a magnum at him with a shaky hand.

"Stay over there!" he yelled "Don't come near me!"

"I'll stay here on two conditions, you provide refreshments on request" Spider-Man said, counting on his fingers "And if you come over here so I can kick you back over there... and I appreciate it if we can do that no less than four times but no more than eleven!" The man took a deep breath before pulling the trigger, the gunshot ringing out as the bullet shot over to Spider-Man.

"Whoa!" he yelled, bending over backwards to dodge the bullet before sticking his legs to the wall and flipping over, landing with his back to the wall "Easy there Han, I've got about three minutes left on my contractually obligated banter before we can fight!" Spider-Man fired a web line at the man's hand, catching the tip of the gun and yanking it away from him.

"Now, contradictory to my previous statement, I do not actually have three minutes to waste as I am currently in pursuit of a very aggressive avian acrobat" Spider-Man said "And he may not actually be an acrobat and I may have just said that to get a longer alliterating sentence, its still up for debate" Spider-Man threw himself off the wall, spinning in the air before delivering an inverted-position boot to the man's face, knocking him to the floor at a fast pace.

"And there we go, that's how you skin, gut and web a delinquent!" Spider-Man said as he webbed the man down to the floor "Join me next week on my hit food-oriented crime fighting series Ready, Steady, Crook!" After giving the man a quick pat on the head and writing one of his signature notes he threw himself out of the window, giving chase to the mad man in a flight suit while trying t figure out an excuse for why he was wearing a school bag when he confronted a villain, as he knew that would be a question he had to answer soon.

Anticlimactic = This Encounter

"Hey Birdy!" Spider-Man yelled, having managed to take several shortcuts over rooftops and through alleyways in order to catch up to the limo and the angry man in very expensive clothing "I've got a feeding basket with your name on it!"

"W-What?" the old man asked, turning around in mid-flight just in time to have Spider-Man's boot land square in the middle of his face, sending them both careening to the ground.

"Get off you fool!" the Vulture yelled "You'll kill us both!"

"Sorry, I'm currently doing a survey on which boot underside tastes the best for my criminal adversaries" Spider-Man said, firing two web-lines to opposite buildings to catch himself and the Vulture "Now once you've sufficiently tasted the sample I'd like you to fill in the enclosed form and then mail it back to me, now don't worry about transport charges pal, I've already provided a stamp" He pivoted in the air so that the Vulture was above him before flipping over backwards and slamming the old man into the hood of a taxi.

"Headshot!" Spider-Man yelled as he back flipped off the old man's head.

"What the fuck man!?" the angry taxi driver bellowed from inside his ruined car "That's got to be fixed now!"

"Just use some of the money you get from your job to do it" Spider-Man said "You can get the money quickly anyway, New York cab rides are a fucking rip off"

"Asshole" came the response. Spider-Man grabbed hold of the flight suit the Vulture was wearing and dragged him off the hood of the car.

"So tell me Mr..." he said, turning the man's head to see it was indeed Toomes "Mr Toomes, as I guessed, what brings you to my neck of the woods at such a break neck speed? Making all of these decent New Yorkers break their necks to get a good look at what's going on?"

"Are you done?" Toomes asked in an irritated tone.

"No, gimme a sec, I think I can get one more" Spider-Man said, sitting down next to the villain and rubbing his chin thoughtfully before snapping his fingers triumphantly "Yeah, got it... You need to be careful or it'll be my neck if you hurt anyone... whaddaya think?"

"I'm going to hurt you" Toomes sighed.

"Oh come one old timer, learn to laugh at yourself" Spider-Man said, patting him on the back of the head with a laugh "Its good for the soul"

"I'm going to tear your soul from your body boy" Toomes spat.

"Okay, first off, how?" Spider-Man asked "Secondly, don't be rude, we're just having a conversation like two civilised costumed freaks, no need to be hostile" There was a faint buzzing that came from Toomes' suit that got Spider-Man's attention very quickly.

"What's the matter there Beaky?" he asked "Did you get a text or something?" His Spider-Sense blasted powerfully, warning him that he was in great danger, and in response he threw himself high into the air just as an electric shockwave emitted from Toomes' suit seconds before he took off at great speed, far too fast for Spider-Man to keep up with.

"Easy with the light show Beaky, I'm getting war flashbacks to Sparkles again" Spider-Man said before speaking under his breath "He's too fast, that... whatever it was put him at a mach greater than mine... mach negative three hundred and sixty two... point five... yeah, this joke is going nowhere" With that prime example of amazing comedy he threw himself off the ground and took after Toomes.

"If I can't catch him, maybe I can catch up to the limo and get Osborn and the others out of danger" he said "Sounds like a plan"

Web after web took him closer and closer to the trail of destruction left by the Vulture now crashing into cars and throwing them out of the way.

"And here I thought old people were annoying when they drove slowly" Spider-Man whistled "I guess this is why they haven't brought Stallone into the latest Fast and Furious movie, R.I.P Paul Walker, you were the man I always wanted to be in those movies" After another minutes of frantic swinging he once again came into view of the Vulture, and the Vulture did the same.

"C'mon Beaky, what's say you leave the nice people alone and we can settle this like civilised-already made that joke, god dammit" Spider-Man sighed, firing a web-line at Vulture to try and latch onto him, to no avail "I'll take that as a no!"

"Get out of here Spider-Man, this doesn't concern you!" the Vulture barked as Spider-Man landed on a wall a few metres away from him.

"I believe you're wrong in that insinuation" Spider-Man said "You're attacking people, that makes this my concern!"

"Then I'll kill you along with Osborn!" the Vulture yelled, blasting over to Spider-Man at full speed. Spider-Man dodged the attack by throwing himself underneath the charging old man, landing softly on the ground and web-zipping over to the limo that had been run off the road. He tore the door off the car and climbed inside, seeing a very terrified Twilight being held by an angry looking Harry. Spider-Man sat down next to Norman who was yelling angrily into his phone.

"Wow, these God-botherers are getting really pushy nowadays aren't they?" Spider-Man asked, seconds before the top of the car was torn off to reveal a furious looking Adrian Toomes.

"Huh, this thing looks good with a sunroof" Spider-Man shrugged "Maybe get a mod of this puppy when you're done here?"

"Spider-Man!" the Vulture yelled "That's my name, don't wear it out" The Vulture jabbed his arm repeatedly into the car, scratching for the superhero as he sat with a cocked head.

"D'you wanna shake hands?" he asked happily "Sure, here you go!" Spider-Man grabbed hold of the old man's hand and yanked him towards the floor of the car before cocking back his other hand, slamming it into Toomes's face. The old man was sent flying out of the car by the force of the impact and Spider-Man sighed in relief.

"I'd get out of here if I were you, I'll keep the old buzzard busy" Spider-Man said.

"I'd prefer to stay in the car, its a strong car" Harry said.

"You might wanna reconsider that pal" Spider-Man said, pointing up at the hole in the roof "Norman bud, get your kid and his lady out of here"

"Right" Norman said, grabbing hold of the two teenagers and heaving them out of the car. Spider-Man then jumped out of the hole in the roof in time to see Toomes getting to his feet. The two of them stood at their full height, Toomes being a good five inches taller than Spider-Man, but the younger obviously being the heavy hitter.

"You've interfered for long enough Spider-Man" Toomes snarled "I'm going to enjoy splattering your organs all over the street"

"Ooh, somebody's touchy aren't they?" Spider-Man asked "No need to get your feathers all rustled old-" Spider-Man's joke was cut off by a blur of movement and a loud cracking noise. Toomes was knocked to the ground as the blur came to a stop, revealing itself to be Ms. Marvel, who then caught Toomes before he hit the ground and hefted him up onto her shoulder.

"Ummm, that's kinda my kill you just stole there" Spider-Man said.

"Sorry kid, but you missed your training session with the Captain yesterday and Fury sent me to get you" she said with a kind smile "Tootles" She then flew off with a wave, leaving Spider-Man standing there with an awkward expression hidden underneath his mask, drumming his hands on his legs.

"Right... then" Spider-Man said, shaking his head and walking away "Am I gonna get an actual fight sometime or is just going to involve a lot of webbing, quipping and repeatedly throwing things? Oh who the fuck am I kidding, its always gonna be like that"

Drawing up a Plan

Spider-Man landed softly on the roof of Stark's New York mansion, dropping down to the ground and wondering to himself why he simply didn't land outside the door to begin with.

"Well..." Spider-Man said "We need to stretch this adventure out as long as we can somehow" He rang the doorbell of the house and was greeted by a friendly-looking scanning system that cast a grid of neon blue lighting down onto him before flashing sporadically.

"Hang on, lemme get my phone out" Spider-Man said "I wanna be in on this rave"

"Target identified: Spider-Man" a robotic voice, not the voice of JARVIS, said.

"First off, I don't like the word target, makes me feel uncomfortable" Spider-man said, pointing a finger at the machine ""And secondly, does JARVIS know Tony's seeing you behind his back and will you kill me if I tell him?" The machine remained vocally silent, merely producing beeping sounds as it continued to analyse Spider-Man for reasons that were unknown to the costumed hero.

"Wow, I bet you're a fun guy to talk to at parties, aren't you?" Spider-Man sighed, crossing his arms and tapping his foot.

"Its not an A.I kid, it won't respond to you" Tony's voice came through a speaker.

"I can see that now, 'Intelligence' clearly isn't in this things description" he nodded "Can I come in, I've got something I want to talk to you about"

"Can you pay the toll to enter?" Stark asked.

"Can you pay for the replacement door when I kick the fucker down?" Spider-Man asked in response. There was a brief whirring sound before a very large and very shooty-looking gun popper out from the wall, followed by another.

And another. Oh Joy!

"What was that?" Tony asked in a mocking tone.

"I said I adore everything you do and would trade my right arm to be even half as smart as you are" Spider-Man said, holding his hands up in surrender "And I love the beard"

"That's better, come on in kid" Stark laughed. The door swung open and then closed behind him, as doors tended to do in this world of wonder, and a small dish extended from the wall, complete with JARVIS's wonderful voice.

"Please deposit the toll sir" he said.

"JARVIS!" Peter exclaimed happily "Its great to see you and all but you're not really gonna make me pay the toll are you?"

"I'm afraid I must inform you that the artillery stationed outside can retract into this area of the house" JARVIS said in a polite tone.

"How much do I owe you pal?" Spider-Man asked begrudgingly.

"Three fifty" JARVIS responded.

"Is that inflation adjusted?" Spider-Man asked, taking his bag off his bag and routing around for his wallet.

"Your humour is duly noted" JARVIS commented.

"Jeez, tough crowd" he said, taking out the money and dropping it into the bowl "Don't spend it all on ladies JARVIS"

"Will do sir" JARVIS said, finally cracking a joke.

"That's my boy!" Spider-Man explained happily.

"I am a computer system, not a boy" JARVIS responded.

"Almost" Spider-Man sighed "Almost had a bit of banter going there... anyway, what's Tony doing?"

"He's down in the lab working on a new type of software" JARVIS responded.

"Ahhh, he's coding in the basement?" Spider-Man asked "Can't beat the old methods can you?"

"I can search several more efficient ways to program new types of software if you wish?" JARVIS offered. Spider-Man looked at the wall where the dish was still protruding and put a hand to his face.

"Just... never mind" he growled, walking away from the wall. Spider-Man used his great mind to analyse the room and think of every architectural layout he'd researched in his younger years to try and find the most efficient and realistic location for the lab to be in this mansion.

The task was extremely arduous for the young genius.

After looking to the left and seeing a stairwell labelled 'Lab' Spider-Man walked over to it and began to traverse the distance down, into the depths of technology and awesomeness. The first thing he was greeted by was a lack of blaring music, something Stark had been quoted as always having on when working on anything he was developing.

"Tony?" Spider-Man called out.

"Over here Pete!" Tony said from behind a multiple monitor set-up.

"So the Avengers told you who I was?" Spider-Man said, webbing a spare chair over to him and pulling his mask off.

"Yup, its usually seen as a good idea for team mates to know who's who" Tony said, speaking and scrolling through several paragraphs of code at the same time "Lets them work together when they're out of uniform"

"Fair enough" Peter shrugged "What're you working on? JARVIS mentioned a new type of software, am I good enough for specifics?"

"Pete, you're not good enough for anything besides fetching the coffee and answering the door" Tony laughed.

"So you'd trust me with three fifty calibre automated turrets mounted on the door?" Peter asked, crossing his arms with a cocked eyebrow.

"Never mind then" Tony said taking a deep breath as he punched in a few more lines of code and then hooked up a small, circular device to his computer.

"So, are you gonna tell me what you're working on?" Peter asked.

"Sure, its an new type of A.I that Stark Industries, that means me, have been trying to create" Stark explained, grabbing a cup of coffee from his desk and sipping it.

"What d'you need a new one for?" Peter asked "You've already got JARVIS upstairs, he gets the job done"

"I know that, but he's got his limitations, you've noticed those haven't you?" Tony asked, looking back at Peter.

"Yeah, though his sense of humour might just be the best I've seen outside of a piece of fucking drywall" Peter said with a nod.

"Too true, so this new A.I I've been working on is gonna be one of the best things I've ever done" Stark continued "Its gonna be an evolving A.I" Peter looked at Stark with a surprised expression before asking a good question.

"You have seen, I don't know, every sci-fi movie involving evolving A.I right?" Peter asked "It gets so smart that it believes it doesn't need to take orders any more, tries to wipe out humanity? I know we don't have any James Bond-esque agents to stop that kind of thing from happening"

"I know right? We only have crummy superheroes and an off switch Peter" Stark said, shooting him an angry glare "Whatever will we do?"

"I think you're missing the point her!" Peter exclaimed loudly, this triggering an alert status in which another turret sprang up from the floor, its sights locked onto Peter.

"How many of these frickin' things do you have in this house?!" Peter demanded.

"Stand down" Stark said with a wave of his hand, the turret responding and retracting back into the floor. Peter blinked twice before looking back at Stark with a question on his mind.

"How much did that cost to make?" Peter asked.

"About forty-five grand for the gun and a hundred bucks for the sensor used to operate it" Stark answered.

"Seems relatively cheap for a laser sensor" Peter said with a confused expression.

"I bought a Kinect and just used that" Tony answered, running the program through a few basic lines of code to see if there were any performance errors.

"Bullshit did you use a Kinect for that" Peter said with a shake of his head.

"I did" Tony nodded.

"No. No you didn't" Peter asserted.

"Why is it so hard to grasp that concept?" Stark asked irritably, turning to face Peter with his own agitated look.

"Because the Kinect never fucking works" Peter said, jabbing a thumb over his shoulder at the spot where the turret had been moments earlier "That does"

"Maybe I altered it a little" Stark shrugged.

"A little?" Peter asked "The Kinect was the same piece of technology that would detect four players while staring at a fucking wall, I don't think you altered it, I think you actually programmed it because it sure as hell wasn't before"

"It was a pretty shit piece of tech" Tony nodded eventually "What was its slogan again? 'You are the controller' or something mind-numbingly stupid like that, right?"

"To be honest I think that the Political-Correctness-Brigade jumped on Microsoft with a claim that it was excluding wheelchair-bound people from social and sporting activities with friends" Peter said with a shake of his head "Because you know I've lost count of the amount of wheelchair bound people that have told me how bad they felt for not being picked to play baseball or represent their high school in the swimming tournaments" Tony looked over to Peter with a blank expression, the two of them staring blankly for a long second before smiles cracked onto their faces.

"I shouldn't laugh at that" Tony said, shaking his head with a grin "I really shouldn't laugh at that"

"Oh come on, everybody loves to make taboo jokes like that, I think it comes third to racist and Nine-Eleven jokes, we've all done it" Peter shrugged. There was silence for a second before Peter spoke up again, a wide grin on his face.

"D'you wanna hear one?" Peter asked "I've got a good one"

"I know I'm gonna regret this... go ahead" Stark said.

"Right... What's the difference between a cow and Nine-Eleven?" Peter asked, happier than he'd been in a while.

"I don't know, what?" Tony asked.

"You can't milk a cow for thirteen years" Peter said with a huge grin. Tony screwed his eyes shut and used every ounce of his self control to try, and fail, to not laugh at the joke.

"Where did you even hear that?" Tony asked.

"My friend Harry and I came up with them when we were in detention at one point" Peter said, smiling at the happy memories "We've got loads of them"

"Can we just talk about the A.I again please?" Tony asked "I've done many things to get me into hell and I don't want laughing at the deaths of thousands of people"

"Thousands? Pfff, I've got a few Holocaust jokes if you wanna hear those?" Peter offered.

"Parker!" Tony snapped "Knock it off"

"Right, sorry, the A.I and how its a stupid idea" Peter said "What's the point of an evolving A.I when you weigh up all the risks?"

"There isn't one... I just want one" Tony shrugged.

"Wow... that's kinda dickish to be honest" Peter said with a nod of his head.

"Are you seriously going to give me a lecture about the moral high ground after what you just came out with?" Tony asked.

"Yes, because not only am I offensive as shit I'm also a massive hypocrite" Peter grinned "So, one quick question, you've always named your A.I right?"

"Yeah"

"What are you gonna call this one?" Peter asked.

"I'm thinking of naming this one relative to what its actual purpose is, instead of what I did with JARVIS" Tony answered.

"Why? What does JARVIS stand for?"

"Just A Rather Very Intelligent System" Tony shrugged, going back to his work.

"Are you serious?" Peter asked.

"Yes I'm serious, I'm the guy who has the superhero identity of Iron Man because its easy to remember and one of my most powerful armours is called the Hulk Buster because it was designed to bust the hulk" Tony said "I'm not the name guy, alright?"

"Its not that its not creative, its just that its the most brilliant and shit thing I've ever heard in my life" Peter said "What are you gonna call the next one?"

"See, this is the one I'm proud of" Tony said with a grin "This one is called the Computer Aided Software Search Ingenuity Engine"

"So... CASSIE?" Peter asked with a raised eyebrow "I guess that is pretty clever"

"Thank you" Tony smiled.

"So what are you planning to do with it?" Peter asked before asking another question "Is it gonna be programmed as a she? Because JARVIS uses a male voice"

"I think with a name like CASSIE it'll have to be female" Tony nodded "And as for what I'm going to do I think I'm going to get her to be the main A.I in the Stark Industries H.Q, I'll make sure she's programmed to be proficient in business, economics and accounting so that others can talk to her about it and anything she doesn't know, I hope she'll be able to learn"

"That sounds very advantageous" Peter nodded "I hope it all goes well"

"Thank you, now is there anything else you came here to talk about?" Tony asked.

"Yeah, I was taking pictures of an interview with the Fantastic Four before I was called away to fight this new guy called the Vulture, tell you about that some other time, and before I went I noticed that Sue Storm was dicking around with a piece of unlicensed Iron Man armour, bootlegged all to hell, but still the same tech" Peter explained "You wouldn't know anything about that?"

"As for the FF having Stark tech, I can explain that, but in regards to our scuffle with that other piece of armour that you found on the thug I've been able to find out where it came from" Tony said, pushing his chair, on wheels, across the floor and over to another computer.

"Because opening more than one file on a computer is way too mainstream" Peter sighed.

"This one doesn't get nearly enough love" Stark chuckled "C'mere" Peter got up and walked over to the computer, seeing Stark opening a file that contained a picture of a man he recognized and a few that he didn't.

"I know him, that's... Alistair Smythe" Peter said "He's one of the higher ups at Oscorp"

"I know, and he's also the one that's diverting the orders for Iron Man tech from my manufacturers in China" Tony said.

"You make the suits in a sweatshop?" Peter asked.

"No, I was banned from making Iron Man suits by the American government, dear Luna was the one to thank for that as she was a little salty about our break-up, but my lawyers were able to find a loophole that allowed me to construct them overseas in the Eastern branch of Stark Industries, the building itself being called the Shintonian Stark Tower, and then ship them back into America without the law being able to touch me for it"

"You and Luna dated at one point?" Peter asked in a confused tone.

"Only for a few weeks, she was kinda freaky in bed and always wanted to be on top" Stark shrugged "Not my thing"

"But you two were friends for a while right?" Peter asked "Before that?"

"Yeah, why?" Stark asked with a sideways glance.

"How did you manage to melt the wall of ice around her?"

"Being rich and having a great reputation in bed" Stark said "And the fact that she hadn't had sex since the mid nineties"

"Was she a girl that talked a lot about her ex-boyfriends?" Peter asked.

"No, but she did lock up when I asked her about him, she wouldn't give me his name and only referred to him as the Feign-Man, or whatever it was was, said it had something to do with his career and that she swore to never speak about him again after what he did to her"

"I bet that killed the mood" Peter chuckled.

"Like you wouldn't believe" Tony nodded "But anyway, the problem with the missing Iron Man tech is that it has to be shipped though international waters, obviously, and the only ships cleared to carry what can be seen as contraband outside of international waters are a company called Orion Shipping, which was a shipping company set up in ninety-three by none other than Norman Osborn"

"Right, so that's how Smythe is getting hold of the Iron Man armour... but if you know its him then why don't you just call the cops or get S.H.I.E.L.D to stop him?"

"Because S.H.I.E.L.D have a policy that doesn't just hurt you remember? This kind of thing doesn't get picked up or cared about my their radar, so I'm on my own" Tony sighed, scratching his beard "And I can't get the cops on him because he leaves no evidence of his crimes"

"But you said he steals them?" Peter asked "Can't you just explain to the police about the missing illegal technology and point them at him?"

"No, because he doesn't steal the shipments, he diverts them" Tony said, cutting into Peter's reasoning "The shipments always arrive, just late and with a goodie basket to say sorry"

"So what's he doing with them?" Peter asked.

"He's doing the same thing Hammer Industries tried to do a few years back, he's reverse engineering them and selling them on the street for the big-name criminals to buy and use" Tony stated "Its the reason I can't just call the armour back or turn it off, they're not chipped like mine are"

"But the one we fought, that one was stolen wasn't it?" Peter asked.

"Yeah, because that one was one that I'd made that had been stolen with the counterfeit suits" Tony continued "It was supposed to be delivered, I'm guessing at least, back to Smythe so he could get a suit he could keep to replicate perfectly, unlike the others which he has to keep sending back to avoid getting anyone's attention"

"So... how many of these things are there?" Peter asked "How can we stop him from doing this?"

"Well the easiest option is to stop creating the suits so Smythe stops copying them" Tony said before continuing, not letting Peter speak "But with how quickly he seems to be cranking these things out I think he's got enough experience with the suits to mass produce them, not perfect them, so stopping the shipments is only gonna stop him from perfecting his designs, not stop them all together"

"So, what?" Peter said "The only way we take these things down is to get Smythe arrested and destroy all the plans he has for the suits?"

"It looks that way" Tony nodded "The only problem is that we don't know where he makes them and how many he's sold"

"That is a problem" Peter nodded, folding his arms and staring at the floor "And we can't arrest Smythe because we haven't got anything to pin on him?"

"Yeah, we're kinda stuck between a rock and a hard place" Tony said "We don't even know who's the big baddie buying the suits"

"I might though, I think its the Big Man buying them all" Peter said with a snap of his fingers "And if Smythe is working for the Big Man then that means Smythe might know who the Big Man is"

"We're getting ahead of ourselves here Peter, first we need to find a way to get at Smythe and get him to stop producing the suits" Tony said.

"Right" Peter said, closing his eyes and thinking for a second "I'd be willing to bet money that Smythe isn't exactly cranking these things out in his apartment is he?"

"And if he isn't then he must be making them at work" Tony nodded "So there has to be a lab somewhere in the Oscorp building making them and that kind of production must produce a high production cost and must drain energy like a mother fucker"

"So we just need to take a look at the Oscorp building records and find out which areas are draining the most power and see what's going on, then cross them off if they don't have anything suspicious going on in them" Peter said, clicking his fingers

"Do you have anyone who could help us break into a high security building without leaving a trace?" Tony asked.

"I used to, but she bailed out on me" Peter sighed "Looks like I'm gonna have to do it myself because your armour isn't going to be good for stealth is it?"

"No, sorry Pete" Tony sighed "Look, you get to wherever it is you need to be and I'll draw up a few plans from what I can get out of their system and my connections"

"Good idea" Peter nodded "I'll drop by in a few days and see what you've got" The two of them nodded and Peter pulled his mask back on over his face and headed back up the stairs, knowing that he needed to go see Captain America and then talk to Mary-Jane and apologize for bailing out.

"And Aunt May... Aunt May before Mary-Jane actually" Spider-Man said, leaving the building "Shit this is starting to get complicated"

Training Round

Peter stood in the boxing ring, leaning against the corner post as he waited for Steve to finish getting into his training attire. The older man walked into the room with a small bag over his shoulder, whistling loudly to get his attention. Peter's eyes shot up and and he waved at the taller man who climbed under the bottom rope and stood up.

"Right, I've got something to tell you" Steve said.

"And that would be?" Peter asked.

"You suck at being a superhero" Steve shrugged, digging around in the bag and taking out two pairs of red boxing gloves, throwing one pair over to Peter.

"Thanks buddy" Peter sighed.

"No problem, but I'm going to make an attempt to fix that" Steve chuckled, pulling the gloves on and rolling his neck "Have you ever boxed before?"

"No, but I've seen a few movies" Peter said with a shake of his head.

"Like what?" Steve asked, bouncing on his feet and throwing a few jabs to warm himself up.

"I think... a little bit of Raging Bull and three of the Rocky movies... one, three and a tiny bit of two" Peter said, picking up the gloves and pulling them on.

"So I'm gonna tell you now that this isn't going to be anything like what you've seen in those movies" Steve said "The fights in those movies were choreographed by Stallone and the others and a load of the punches they throw don't even make contact" Peter nodded, rolling his wrists and flexing his fingers inside the gloves before looking back at Steve.

"Quick question, why are we boxing right now instead of something like Tai Chi?" Peter asked "Surely that would be helpful against super-villains, right?"

"No" Steve said "Most of the super villains in this world are scientific disasters and the occasional mad scientist, barely any of them will be skilled in actual fighting and it'll probably be nothing more than a slug-fest between you and them"

"But what about Elektra?" Peter asked "She isn't your every day thug"

"We'll deal with her in time, I had a talk with Black Widow and we both realize that we had way too much confidence in your abilities as a fighter so we're going to take it back to a much more basic fighting style" Steve explained "But don't think that boxing is just a fighting style for people who aren't good at actual martial arts, boxing is one of the best fighting styles for stamina conservation and durability despite its simplicity"

"Right... so how are we gonna start?" Peter asked.

"We're gonna go through a few rounds and I'll see how you're doing during those" Steve said "Ready?"

"Not really" Peter sighed, putting his hands up and taking a deep breath. Steve eyed up Peter for a brief second before moving towards him, shuffling his feet slowly as Peter moved towards him. Peter made the first move, and the first mistake, of the fight. He threw himself forwards with a powerful right hook that Steve managed to dodge by leaning back before ducking forwards and landing a left jab on Peter's face, causing him to stumble back, allowing Steve to follow it up with a powerful right hook to the side of the face.

"Fuck!" Peter yelled as the blow sent him careening to the floor, his head slamming onto the dusty matt as his body lay out flat.

"That was pretty bad Peter, you just got knocked down in the opening seconds of the first round" Steve sighed "Get up" Peter pushed himself back up to his feet and held his hands up again, shuffling forward and throwing a right jab at Steve's head only to have the more skilled fighter duck to the side and land a left hook into Peter's side, causing him to fold slightly, upsetting his balance and open him up for another powerful right hook knock him to the floor.

Steve shook his head, lowering his hands and shaking them briefly as Peter growled angrily, pushing himself up and bringing his hands up once more.

"The mistake you keep making is that you're putting all of your weight into your swings and not keeping your core straight" Steve instructed "When they saw 'throw a punch' they mean the punch Peter, not your entire body"

"Doesn't that make it hit harder though?" Peter asked.

"Yes, and for some people that works" Steve nodded "Buts for most people its a terrible idea to try and punch through your opponent, because if you're not packing the power to knock them out in one then you're not only gonna tire yourself out faster than you would normally but you leave yourself open to some brutal counter-attacks"

"So what should I do?" Peter asked with a sigh.

"Boxing, despite being easy to get the hang of, isn't a defined fighting style like Tai Chi or other martial arts, its a base model for people to adapt their own strategies and styles from, that's why there's no 'one way' to box and win" Steve explained "You're gonna have to try out a few different styles in practice before you actually step into the ring with someone"

"Right... so what d'you think I'd be good at?" Peter said.

"Well, from the way I've seen you fight, I figure we should start with fast hits and faster dodges" Steve suggested "I've studied modern boxers since I woke up and one person I'd suggest, for dodging that is, is Mike Tyson"

"Tyson?" Peter asked "I thought his strategy was to try and punch through people?"

"It was, but his dodging was to cover his face as best as he could and move fast and erratically enough to either avoid or shrug off his opponents punches" Steve explained "If you're gonna emulate someone, I'd pick Tyson's dodging technique, c'mon, lets have another quick brawl" Peter nodded his head and moved towards Steve again, this time watching Steve's movements and not throwing his own punch.

"Good idea, let me make the first move and see how I fight" Steve nodded. He then moved forward with three right jabs, two of them missing Peter just barely, the third one skimming his face as it was slightly more delayed than the first two, but the third dodge forced Peter to throw himself into a brutal left hook that slammed into his jaw and sent him spinning to the side.

A grunt came from Peter as Steve moved around to his other side, forcing him to stop moving, and continued to jab at his middle before throwing a right hook. Peter was able to duck under the sweeping force of the hook but was caught off-guard by a strong uppercut to the chin that caused him to stagger back.

"Don't go down" Steve growled, watching Peter catch himself on his foot before pushing forward with a right hook of his own. Steve dodge the attack easily, this time stepping to the side to get to Peter's unguarded left before throwing two sweeping hooks that caught Peter in the kidney area. Peter grimaced in pain and was once again forced to contort his body in a pitiful attempt to cover his exposed spot.

Steve then stood up to his full height and brought an angled punch down onto Peter's face, sending him to the floor.

"Alright" Steve said "You're not doing as bad as I thought you would"

"I think I'm gonna disagree" came Widow's voice from the side of the ring. She had entered the room during the scuffle and had taken a seat by herself, her left leg crossed over her right and her fingers linked on her knees and she leaned back.

"I would've thought he could move away from you when you start to move yourself" she sighed "Letting us and yourself down again are we Parker?"

"That's kinda my thing so far" Peter sighed, rubbing his bruised face with one of his gloves. Peter's Spider-Sense went off again as Steve swung another punch for his head. He ducked under the punch and retaliated with a jab to Steve's gut, this time the attack landing. Peter then backed off and stood up to his full height before realizing that he'd lost his advantage on Steve and the taller man went on the offensive again.

"Your endurance seems to be keeping you on your feet Parker" Widow commented "Most people who waste as much energy in punches that miss are unconscious by the end of the first round"

"Thanks Widow" Peter growled, receiving another two hit combo to the stomach and then to the face.

"You're forgetting to keep your hands up Peter" Steve said "Even when you throw a punch you've gotta keep one close" Steven then proved the point by throwing a jab to Peter's face as the teen threw his own, then slamming two brutal right jabs into his nose.

"Stay up" Steve said, watching as Peter straightened up and followed with a feinted left jab and an awkward right uppercut that missed completely. Steve then changed his own angle to one that forced Peter into a corner where he began to repeatedly slam uppercuts into Peter's stomach before steeping back and landing another powerful hook to his right eye.

Peter was thrown into the corner where he found it difficult to stand, all of the wind in his system being knocked out of him, sweat dripping down his face and his body being in throbbing pain.

"Come on Parker, it wasn't that bad" Widow said with a roll of her eyes.

"No pain Peter" Steve said.

"What?" Peter asked in an agonized tone.

"No pain, ignore it" Steve said.

"Its a lot fucking harder than that" Peter growled.

"No, no it isn't Peter" Steve said "The only thing that's reminding you of how it hurts if the fact you're paying attention to it" Steve continued "Ignore it and keep going, say it with me; no pain"

"No pain" Peter panted.

"No pain!" Steve barked.

"No pain" Peter wheezed.

"Peter, get up!" Steve ordered "No pain!"

"No pain!" Peter managed to cough out, pushing himself back up to his feet and wiping the sweat off his brow.

"Alright, let's go kid!" Steve yelled, slamming his gloves together and holding them back up by his face, bouncing from foot to foot.

Confidence Boosting

The training match the two had been going through had ended up going past the hour they'd originally intended it to be, with Peter and Steve now being drenched in sweat and covered in bruises, Peter much more so than Steve, and the other Avengers sitting around watching.

"Alright Peter, we're up to round seven and I'm not going to go easy on you any more" Steve said.

"You were going easy?" Peter asked in a terrified tone.

"Yeah, not any more though" Steve grinned "get ready for a world of pain"

"Well... the kid's fucked" Widow said with a grin.

"I think he can do this" Ms. Marvel said with a smile "Come on Peter!"

"What about you Banner?" Widow asked Bruce who was sitting with a bucket of popcorn in his hand.

"I think we're gonna be sweeping Peter off the floor in a dustpan" he chuckled.

"You know you guys aren't helping right" Peter whimpered "Except you Ms. Marvel, I like you" The blonde woman smiled at him as Widow rang the bell for the seventh round and Steve rushed over to Peter, coming out of his corner with four powerful right hooks, each one managing to hit Peter square in the face as he had become too exhausted to dodge the attacks.

"Come on Peter!" Ms. Marvel called "You can do this!"

"No he can't, don't get his hopes up" Widow laughed "Try not to break him too badly Steve" Peter was once again forced into a corner where Steve began to throw several powerful punches into his abdomen, each one sending a searing rush of pain into his stomach that made him want to throw up.

Steve then moved back, cocking his fist for the destroying right hook, but Peter was able to throw a left jab at Steve's shoulder that made his arm go slack before throwing a punch at his face and pushing him back.

"Huh" Widow said as Peter began to go on the offensive, managing to land three powerful right hooks in Steve's face before the legendary soldier ducked under the fourth one and slam a straight-arm jab into Peter's gut, clipping him in the face with a right hook and then throwing him into another corner again with a hooking motion from his left arm.

"Ugh, not this again" Peter groaned before a new series of punches, this time to the face, slammed into him with renewed energy. Peter's brain was slammed around inside his skull as his once-proud desire to keep on fighting was being rapidly stamped out by the barrage of searing pain that erupted from the vicious beating he was suffering.

"Come on Parker" Widow chuckled "Get your hands up" Peter tried his best to move his gloves into a defensive position, and upon finding that this strategy gained him no new ground he tried to push Steve back again only to have the much more powerful fighter aim two right hooks at the side of his head, one of them pushing him back into the corner and the second one knocking him clean to the floor.

"And he is down" Widow said "But hey, seven rounds isn't that bad for a newbie"

"Don't count him out just yet Natasha" Ms. Marvel said, looking at Steve who was bouncing back and forth on his heels again. But for Peter the event wasn't as pleasant as he'd imagined. In the few fights he'd had with super villains he'd been knocked around, as most people did, but he'd never been given a beating like this before.

"C'mon Pete, no pain" Steve called out, seemingly from a distance. Peter's head seemed to pulse with one of the worst pains he'd ever had, his stomach ached and felt as if it were beginning to split apart with every breath, his arms were beyond tired and felt like nothing more than two pieces of lead attached to his torso that kept him down on the floor. He felt sick to his stomach and could no longer stand.

He would've liked to have said that he tried to get to his feet, that he gave everything he had mentally but his body simply wouldn't respond but that wasn't the case.

"He's not getting up, is he?" Bruce asked, still munching his popcorn.

"Nope" Widow chuckled "Just like I said" Peter's will to fight had been completely stamped out by the beating he'd taken. All of his bluster he'd once had had vanished from inside of him and his fiery spirit had been crushed. His nerd instincts were kicking in, telling him that the best way to survive was to simply lie down and stay down, to not get up and let whatever happened happen.

"No pain!" Steve called, but Peter's mind and body were refusing to listen, instead, he merely whimpered.

"I can't" Peter moaned.

"What?" Steve asked.

"I can't" Peter repeated, louder this time.

"Are you done?" Steve asked with a raised eyebrow "You sure you can't go on?"

"Steve... I can't" Peter said a third time.

"Disappointing" Widow said with a roll of her eyes "As usual"

"Widow" Steve said sternly, pulling his gloves off and walking over to Peter "Don't feel too bad kid, I'm not expecting you to be Muhammad Ali within the first few days"

"I know that but... I just feel shit having to go through baby steps around legends like you guys" Peter said, picking himself up off the floor and leaning against the corner post "I just feel like I'm not worth it"

"And I think we've all been there before Peter" Steve said with a grin, patting the teen on the shoulder "On the first mission I was sent out on as Captain America I slipped when throwing my shield, missed the guy I was aiming for and had it come back and hit me in the face... I think it chipped a tooth actually"

"When I was first sent out by S.H.I.E.L.D, before I got my powers, I was set up as a sniper on a ridge to overlook a meeting between two warring leaders and when everything started going down I moved my position to get a better angle and didn't use the butt of the sniper to steady the shot so when I looked down the scope and fired it hit me in the eye and knocked me out for a few minutes"

"When I was given my first lab job I was assigned an assistant to help keep track of things but I told him that I was so intelligent that I didn't need him to remember things" Bruce said with a nostalgic smile on his face "I was bluffing of course and hoped that he would remember just out of decency but he never did, so when I forgot what one of our assignments was for our boss he hadn't listened either so we were both reprimanded for it"

There was then an expectant glance thrown at Black Widow, who had yet to voice her rookie mistakes but she remained quiet.

"What?" she asked after a moment of silence.

"What did you fuck up on?" Steve asked "There has to be something?"

"No, there was nothing" Widow said, crossing her arms and looking away from the others.

"Come on Natasha, tell us what happened" Ms. Marvel said with a sly smile.

"Shut up Carol" Widow growled.

"Come on, we're only having a little bit of fun here" Bruce chuckled "Its nothing to be ashamed of, spit it out" Widow glared at each one of them individually before she finally caved in.

"I... I was picked up b S.H.I.E.L.D in Russia and was sent to Moscow on a spec ops mission under strict orders not to engage in gunfights. My partner was much more skilled and experienced than I was at the time and I really wanted to impress her by doing something that I thought was 'cool', so when we were forced into a gunfight I tried to pull off a trick shot by spinning my gun around my finger before taking out the other shooter but..."

"But what?" Bruce asked.

"But... I jerked by hand out to continue the spin but with the angle the gun was at... it pushed the trigger down" Widow said, putting her face in her hands "And I shot myself in the leg and I had to be taken off the mission and out of service for three weeks until the injury was healed... happy now?" The Avengers all kept the laughter to a respectful level, nothing more than a few chuckles as they al reminisced about their own past mistakes and how they'd improved on them since then.

"What did your partner say about that?" Steve asked.

"She, uh, she refused to ever work with me again" Natasha said, sweeping her blood red fringe out of her eyes and switching the legs she had crossed.

"Awesome" Steve said with a smirk before turning back to Peter "See kid? Nobody starts off being perfect, nobody starts with skill, we may have talent, like you do, but skill is something that is only developed through hours and hours of training, you've only just started doing what you do and you've still got a long way to go before you're as good as us"

"Am I... am I at least better than Hawkeye?" Peter asked.

"Of course" Steve nodded.

"How couldn't you be?" Bruce asked.

"Why would you even ask a question like that?" Ms. Marvel asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Hey!" Widow snapped "Leave him alone!"

"Sorry, we shouldn't make fun of her boyfriend" Steve said "We know how sensitive he gets"

"What are we talking about?" Clint's voice asked from the doorway.

"Oh nothing buddy" Steve said with a grin "Just how we value you as a team mate and know you're the reason the Avengers even exist in the first place"

"Fuck you" Clint said with a faint smirk.

"Like I said, good to have you here buddy" Steve nodded "Right Parker, lets get you cleaned and patched up, can't be having the Amazing Spider-Man walking around like bruised ham now can we?"

A Look Into the Past

Peter rapped on the doorframe of his Aunt's bedroom door, the fifty two year old woman turning her head to look at her nephew.

"Hey there Peter, I was wondering when you were gonna get home" she said with a smile.

"Yeah..." Peter said, scratching the back of his head "Its been a rough day so far, but let's not talk about me, how're you doing?"

"I'm fine" she said with a nod to her arm, holding up the plaster cast-bound limb with a proud nod "This makes me cool with the kids now, right?"

"Depends, did you get it on camera and was the recovery cool?" Peter asked, walking over and sitting down on the foot of the bed.

"Well... I think the security camera caught the fall and I did a roll after I hit the ground... so yeah, I think I met the criteria" she smirked.

"Well if you make it onto Fail Army I'll call you in and we can both watch and laugh at your crash and burn" Peter chuckled before his face became downcast "Then again, I might have to sell my computer before then" May looked at her nephew with a worried look in her eyes, leaning forward and placing a hand on his shoulder.

"Look Peter, we'll manage" she said with a soft smile "We always have"

"Not without Uncle Ben" Peter said, placing a hand to his face and sighing "He's always been the one that's pulled us both through"

"Yes, he did" May nodded "But he did it through ingenuity, that's one thing he taught you right?"

"Yeah, 'those who think whilst on their feet learn to think fastest'" Peter nodded, chuckling to himself "His middle name wasn't Confucius by any chance was it?"

"No" May chuckled "Its just that he and your father were the masters of philosophical sayings and beliefs"

"You mean they were incredible at coming up with bullshit phrases to justify reckless behaviour?" Peter asked with a smile.

"Watch your language" May grinned "But yes, they were good at that" There was silence between the two of them for a second before Peter looked up at the wall.

"What would my Dad have done?" Peter asked "How would he have sorted this out?"

"Well... your father probably would've used his intellect to sort things out... that or he would've just become a professional fighter" May said, chuckling to herself.

"What?" Peter asked in a confused tone.

"You mean I never told you that?" May asked with a raised eyebrow "Your father was the man to be on your side if you were ever in a scuffle, he managed to get your mother's phone number by beating up a man that kept harassing her" Peter looked at his Aunt with a bewildered expression, not sure how to comprehend the idea of his father, the man who'd been described as a gentle man of science as some kind of Rocky Balboa.

"I think you're lucky you got your father's body type, he wasn't a very wide man but he had a good frame on him that looked good when he put on a little bit of muscle" May said, leaning back against the headboard and looking up at the lights "Your mother would take any opportunity to show off her husband's amazing physique if she could"

"This raised an important question for Peter.

"Now that we're talking about it, what was my Mom like?" he asked, realizing that despite the years he'd lived without his parents he'd never really inquired about them that often "From what I've heard, she sounds kinda like a vanity queen"

"Oh no, she was the furthest thing from a vanity queen you could ever see, though I did despise going out in public with her" May said with a chuckle.

"Really?" Peter asked "Why?"

"Because I was jealous of her" she admitted "She was the one of the most beautiful woman I'd ever seen, your father used to tease Ben about Mary for years" May seemed to go for a drive down memory lane for several long seconds before something came to her.

"Actually... I think I've got a photo of her and your father... somewhere in the house" May said, attempting to sit up before Peter placed a hand on her shoulder.

"Don't get up, I'll look for it" Peter said.

"Not that I don't value your help, but honestly Peter, you're the kind of person who couldn't find a needle in a stack of needles" May said "And besides, I've broken my arm, not lost the entire lower half of my body"

"Wouldn't that be a tragedy?" Peter asked "You wouldn't be able to reach the kitchen counter... then who would make me breakfast?" May shot her nephew an irritated look as she climbed out of the bed and heading out of the room.

"It should be in the attic" May said "Can you grab the rope thing?"

"Yes Captain Terminology" Peter said, leaping up to the hanging tag and pulling it down, catching the on-rails ladder before it knocked Aunt May out.

"Nice jump" she nodded.

"Thank you, ladies first" Peter said, gesturing to the ladder. May nodded and ascended the ladder, using her Aunt May powers to climb the ladder one handed, before Peter followed her up.

"You know this used to be your favourite place to come sit when you were six years old?" May asked.

"I... I think so" Peter said "I can't remember why though"

"The reason your Uncle and I came up with was that when your mother was moving some boxes of yours up here her bottle of perfume fell out of her pocket, the one she'd used a few minutes ago and hadn't had time to put back in her bag, and it smashed on the floor" May explained as they began to look through some of the cardboard boxes in the area "Since it was such a big spill it stunk the attic out for weeks but when your Uncle Ben came up to check if the smell had gone, he brought you with him, you had your colouring book to keep you entertained and you just... sat down and didn't want to move"

"How come?" Peter asked.

"Well, it was your mother's favourite perfume that she smashed, one that she wore when she used to hold you and rock you to sleep as a baby, so when you smelled it again it reminded you of your mother and how she held you... and you just didn't want to go anywhere, you just sat down and started colouring again with a smile on your face"

"Wow" Peter said, moving a box out of the way and seeing a very large stain on the wooden floor and an extremely familiar smell rush through his nostrils "What was the name of the perfume?"

"It was Chanel, Coco Mademoiselle if I remember correctly, good stuff" May said, moving her eyes over to her nephew who had knelt down next to the stain and placed a hand on it, a look of loss on his face. She slowly walked over to him, kneeling down and putting a hand on his shoulder.

"You okay Pete?" she asked gently.

"Y-Yeah..." Peter said, his eyes appearing misty as his limited memories of his mother came flooding back to him "I guess I miss her more than I thought I did"

"She was heartbroken about leaving you" May said "She tried her best to make you feel like nothing was wrong but she couldn't stop crying, even your father teared up for a little while" Peter didn't say anything, he merely wiped the floor with his hand and lifted it up to his nose, inhaling softly and getting a much stronger scent, the smell of his mother and the taste of a life that he'd lost the day they'd left him.

"Do you need a few minutes?" May asked "We can look later if you want?"

"No, no, I think I'm good" Peter said, standing up and going back to looking through the boxes "Any hints as to what we're looking for here?"

"It'll be in a leather briefcase, there should be a box in there with some stuff too" May said. The two of them searched through several boxes for several long minutes before Peter struck metaphorical gold.

"I think I've got it" Peter called, taking out a leather briefcase and setting it down on the floor.

"Don't open it here, we'll take it down to the living room" May said.

"Right" Peter nodded, picking the brief case up and carrying it down out of the attic. The two of them took it downstairs and set it down onto the glass coffee table in the living room, Peter's hands trembling slightly as he undid the clasps on the briefcase.

"Do you know what's in here?" Peter asked.

"A few photos I think, I haven't opened it in years" May said. Peter nodded and lifted the lid up, looking inside to see several packets of photos, an envelope and a small black DVD case.

"Huh... where to start?" Peter asked, making a decision to look through the packets of photos, seeing one of them labelled 'Parker Wedding '97'. Peter opened the small plastic packet and slid several of the photos out, being greeted by the beaming face of a gorgeous woman with thick, blonde hair under a white tiara in a covering wedding dress. Peter's throat became tighter as he instinctively recognized his mother, being shocked at the colour of her hair as he distinctly remembered her as a brunette.

"See?" May asked "She was beautiful wasn't she?"

"I... wow" Peter said, at a loss for words "Did... did she dye her hair blonde for the wedding?"

"Hm? No, your mother was always blonde, people at her school always made fun of her for being an Aryan for her blonde hair and blue eyes as well as being quite tall for a girl, she was about five-eight when she was eleven years old"

"Wow... she was taller than I am" Peter said, staring at the photo and trying to commit every detail of his mother's face to memory "Christ I really am short aren't I?"

"Peter" May said sternly.

"Right, photos" Peter nodded, sliding the first to the back and looking at the second one, a picture of the bride and groom standing at the end of the aisle, holding hands as they stood nose-to-nose "Jesus Christ... I never realized I looked that much like him"

"Oh yeah, people always said when you were about three years old that you weren't just going to look like your father, you'd be his doppelgänger" May nodded "And they were right, you two look nearly identical" Peter flipped to another photo where he could see his father's face, with his mother leaning against his side, this picture being taken at the after party, and the newly-weds were smiling happily.

"What did I tell you?" My asked, patting her nephew on the back with a smile.

"Wow" Peter chuckled "We are the same person aren't we?"

"Have a look at the other ones, I think a few of them have got you in them" May said, handing the other packet to Peter. Peter nodded, taking the packet and opening it, removing the photos and looking at them with a smile. The first one he saw was his mother wearing a pair of jeans and white T-Shirt, holding a four-year old Peter Parker, the two of them grinning happily as they played with a set of toys.

"That woman was lucky, she never looked bad in any photo that was taken of her" May chuckled "I think there's one of us in this where we're at your fifth birthday party and she looks like a Vogue model and I look like a battered old donkey"

"You're not that much older than her are you?" Peter asked.

"If I'm turning fifty three next year, our birthday's being in the same month, then she'd be forty two now, so yeah, there was a ten year gap between us" May said, counting it out in her head "Same with your Uncle Ben and your father, Ben was ten years old when Richard was born and he looked after him for years"

"So she was twenty-seven when she had me" Peter said "How did she look during pregnancy?"

"Gorgeous, as usual Peter" May smiled "I can't recall a day that went by where your mother didn't look fabulous... and I hated her for it" Peter chuckled as they browsed through several more photos before Peter moved his eyes over to the DVD case.

"Did you watch the DVD?" he asked May.

"I... I think so" May said, scratching the back of her head "I can't remember what was on it if we did"

"Can we watch it now?" Peter asked.

"Sure, just stick it in the DVD player and I'll go on an expedition for the remote" May said. The two of them went about their jobs and soon they were sitting on the couch with remote in hand. Peter hit the play button and the early two thousand's technology did its best to operate in the modern DVD player. There was silence and darkness at first before a small chuckle came from somewhere and a voice that sounded just familiar to Peter spoke.

"I forget to take the cap off the lense" they chuckled. A female chuckle responded and there was a sound of scratching, light blinding the lense and the image focusing on a blonde woman, Peter's mother. She sat with her back against the couch, once again wearing a pair of jeans, a white shirt and a blue cardigan.

"Brilliant job there hubby" she spoke "Remind me to ask you to teach Petey how to handle a camera" Peter's heart leaped into his throat as he heard his mother's voice, but once again, in a manner that his memory had caused him to forget. Her accent wasn't American, it was English.

"Whoa" Peter said in surprise, pausing the video "When did Mom get an English accent?"

"Do... do you not remember?" May asked "Your mother was always English, she was born and raised in Cambridge, she and your father met when he was giving a lecture for Oscorp in Cambridge University"

"Wait, Mom got into Cambridge?" Peter asked in shock "That's, like, one of the best universities in England"

"I know, your mother was a genius Peter, the lowest grades she got on her O-Levels was an A" May chuckled "I thought you'd be more impressed about the fact your father was giving a lecture at Cambridge at twenty-seven years old"

"Oh yeah... that is impressive I guess" Peter nodded "How long was Dad there for?"

"I think he was there for three years, he left America in... ninety-five I think and the two were married within two years" May explained "They were in love, there was no denying it"

"Why did he leave?" Peter asked "Was it for work?"

"Not at first... I don't think" May said, tapping her fingers on her knee.

"What... what d'you mean?" Peter asked.

"I don't know for sure, but I overheard an argument between him and your Uncle a few days before he left about something... or somebody, when your Uncle asked him what he was talking about all I heard him say was that 'The magic had gone, the budget was out and the castle would remain silent'" May said "Your Uncle would never tell me what he meant by that" Peter looked back at the TV, thumbing the play button as he was eager to see what the DVD showed but he couldn't escape the fact that what his Aunt had just told him was something relevant, something that hadn't been resolved quite yet.

"Come on Rich, bring Peter over here" Mary said, holding her arms out and gesturing for her husband "I wanna give him a hug"

"Alright" Richard's voice agreed. There was the sound of some kind of buckle being undone, followed by an explanation.

"Come on big guy, let's get you out of that seat" Richard said, grunting as he lifted his son up "Jesus, we need to stop feeding you, you're getting too heavy for me to lift"

"Daddy!" came an excited voice from a child as Richard's form moved in front of the camera, sitting down next to his wife with a brown-haired little toddler, about two years old.

"Hey" Mary said, flicking her husband on the arm "Don't call him fat, he's not, he's beautiful isn't he" Mary made a playful face at the toddler Peter and started baby-talking to him, the response of the toddler being to hold his arms out to her and shout for her.

"Mommy!" the child yelled.

"Does he wanna come see Mommy?" Mary asked, tickling the child's stomach "C'mere then baby!" Richard handed the child over to his wife with a roll of his eyes.

"Because as we both know he hates his Dad" he sighed.

"No he doesn't, he loved you as much as he loves me" Mary giggled "Isn't that right Petey?"

"Y-Ya" the toddler mumbled. There came a loud ringing noise from the space behind the camera as the phone went off, followed by a loud dog's bark.

"Ben!" Richard snapped, calling for the dog to be quiet.

"He named the dog Ben?" Peter asked.

"Yeah, and your Uncle and I had a dog called Richard at the same time" May chuckled "It was a joke they wanted to have with each other"

"Hey Petey, I want you to look at the camera and say hiya, can you do that for Mommy?" Mary asked the toddler Peter. The toddler looked up at his mother with a wide smile before burying his head in her chest, seemingly out of embarrassment, causing his mother to laugh loudly.

"Awww, poor baby" she chuckled, patting him on the back "Don't be shy, you're talking to you when you're older" Mary put the toddler down between her legs and looked up at the camera with a beautiful smile on her face.

"Now, I know you're listening Peter but I don't know when, it could be next week, it could be in three years or you could be watching this at your twenty-first birthday" Mary said, speaking directly to the Peter on the couch "But I just want you to know that no matter how old you get, whether you move away from us and don't keep in contact, or if we're long gone while you're watching this, I just want you to know that your father and I love you with all our hearts... and that we're looking forward to watching you grow up, because we'll be there with you for every bump, scrape and bruise you'll get, and we'll help you through it together because we're family"

Peter could barely hold back the tears at this point.

"Are you alright Peter?" May asked, placing a hand on his shoulder.

"No... I need to take a break, I can't watch this any more" Peter said, pausing the video and looking at his mother's face one last time before standing up and walking to the doorway "Thanks for showing me this Aunt May"

"Its no problem Peter" May said "Just let me know when you want to see more of it"

And with that, Peter headed up the stairs and into his bedroom, trying his best to contain his emotions, trying to be strong like he knew he needed to be. Like he wanted to be.

Zero-To-Jesusfuckingchristparkerwhyareyousuchacunt?

Peter sat, leaning heavily against his chair as he stared blankly into the wall in front of him. He'd been quiet for several minutes, listening to nothing more than the sound of his wall clock counting away the seconds and his own memories of hearing his mother's voice, the resonating sound of the clear, familiar yet foreign accent, striking chords of loss and happiness all over his body.

"Uh" he grunted, feeling his throat begin to tighten as yet another wave of tears welled up in his eyes. He quickly swept the liquid loss away from his cheeks and leaned forward, deciding there had to be something he could do to get his mind off his heartache.

"The files" he mumbled, unlocking his computer and opening his email. After trawling through emails about Youtube uploads from his subscriptions, Facebook and Twitter notifications, he came across an email from a completely blank address. He clicked on it and read through the text before opening the attachment.

Parker, here's some light reading about your Dad, Signed, Fury the text read.

"It better not be fucking light reading" Peter said, opening the attachment to find that he'd been ripped off. The file was completely blank except for three names: Richard Parker, Victor and Jonathan Drew.

"Oh you are fucking kidding me" Peter snarled, locking his computer again and grabbing his bag, slinging it over his shoulder and storming downstairs.

"Aunt May!" he called "I'm going out for a walk!"

"Don't be back after nine" she responded "And don't talk to strangers" Peter opened the door, his eyes locked onto his laces to see if they were tied before closing and locking the door behind him.

"Right..." he muttered to himself, turning around only to have his Spider-Sense flare up a split second before a hand was placed against his chest that shoved him back up against his door. Peter's eyes widened in terror as he stared at the blood red hair of a familiar girl with green eyes that shined with fury.

"Going somewhere?" she snarled.

"Yeah..." Peter muttered, genuinely terrified.

"That wouldn't happen to be Jonah's office to apologize for your pathetic excuse of a job would it?" she asked, not letting go of him "Or would it be over to my place to apologize to me?"

"I... uh..." Peter mumbled, his usual fast-talking skill tree being completed respecced to four points in jabber-mouth.

"Well Parker?" she demanded "What's your answer?"

"He was doing other things" came another female voice. Peter looked over Mary-Jane's shoulder to see Twilight standing with her arms crossed "More important things" Mary-Jane whirled around and stormed over to the shorter teenager, glaring furiously at her.

"What the hell is more important than his job?" she demanded, standing three inches taller the lavender-haired girl and glaring down at her.

"To be honest, I don't think you have the right to ask him" Twilight snarled "His business is his business and if he wants to tell you what he's doing then he will" Twilight countered.

"I think that it was my business as we were working together, then he bailed out on me!" Mary-Jane snarled "He made me look like an idiot and ended up making me turn in an incomplete interview, which got me one hell of a yelling at by our boss!"

"I think that's your big problem here isn't it?" Twilight asked, crossing her arms "You're not mad at the fact Peter left, you're mad at the fact he made you look stupid, because you always have to look your best don't you Miss Watson?" Mary-Jane jabbed a finger into Twilight's collarbone and placed her face mere inches away from hers as she spoke through gritted teeth.

"I didn't come here to be judged by you, or him, or anyone" she growled "And I don't have to listen to your shit Sparkle" Mary-Jane then turned around to Peter and pointed at him with anger in her stance.

"And you Parker, the boss wants a word with you about today's fuck-up" she said "You might not have to explain yourself to me, on the word of Twilight here, but I'd like to see you keep your job without explaining it to him"

"Mary-Jane, come on-"

"No, I don't want to hear your bullshit excuses Parker" she interrupted, turning around with a wave of her hand and walking away "I look forward to never working with you again" With that the tension lessened and Twilight walked over to Peter, her temper still flaring.

"Wow, what a bitch" she sighed, rubbing her temples with a deep breath "Can you believe her?"

"Well... yeah, actually" Peter said in an awkward tone "She was kinda justified" Twilight stared at Peter for a long second before shaking her head quickly and pointing a finger at him.

"Are you serious?" she demanded "Peter, she was doing nothing but accusing you of running away from work"

"Which... I kinda did" Peter nodded "I think you were a little harsh on her to be honest"

"Okay, now you're just being fucking dumb Parker" Twilight growled "She wasn't mad at you for leaving work, you made her look bad and that's what she was mad about!"

"So, then I'm still in the wrong" Peter said "What the fuck am I saying right now?"

"I... I can't believe I'm listening to you defend that vain, egotistical, red-headed bitch" Twilight said.

"I'm just saying that she had every right to be mad at me... and I do think that you were a little too hard on her" Peter said, stuffing his hands into his pockets "Shut the fuck up Parker!"

"You think I was out of line?" Twilight demanded "I was trying to defend you, since you seem to be so determined to make yourself look like the biggest asshole on the planet right now I thought I'd step in and help"

"Twilight, its not like that" Peter said quickly, only to be cut off by the shorter girl.

"You know what Parker, Mary-Jane may be vain and she may be a bitch, but she and I have got one thing in common right now: I don't wanna hear your bullshit excuses, how about the next time you're in trouble I just let you squirm, is that a better idea?"

"Twilight, listen to me-" Peter said, reaching out a hand for her only to have her swat it away.

"No, you can stay right there and keep your hands the fuck off me, I don't want anything to do with you right now Parker" Twilight turned around and walked away, leaving Peter standing there with a tight throat and balled fists.

"Good. Fucking. Going" Peter growled inside his mind, placing a hand to his face and sighing loudly "Great, that's two of the only girls that have ever bothered to talk to me gone, what the fuck else could go wrong today?"

Meeting and Fleeting Greetings

Spider-Man crawled in through the window of the Triskellion and landed lightly on the floor, looking around the darkened office room for any sign of movement.

"Alright, now I just need to find out where Fury is and I can try to convince him to let me have a look at my Dad's file" Spider-Man whispered. He exited the office and walked through the halls until he came to the command room where the lights were on an other members of the Avengers were sitting around a table. Spider-Man stood still for a long second before walking up the steps to the table and waving at Fury, who had just noticed him as he'd handed a drink to Steve.

"Parker, we were hoping for you to show up" Fury said with a smile "We need another intern moving the beer crates around"

"Yeah that's great Fury, listen I need to talk to you about... wait, what d'you mean intern?" Spider-man asked, pulling his mask off "And what d'you mean beer crates?"

"We're having our new, annual Avengers dinner and we need a few of the S.H.I.E.L.D interns to help set the place up" Fury explained "And you're one of them"

"Hold the fuck up pal, I'm not an intern" Peter snapped "I don't work for you guys and I'm sure as hell not fetching any fucking beer crates"

"You seem a little agitated Peter" Ms. Marvel said with a concerned look on her face "Are you alright?"

"Not to sound like a dick" Stark said with a hand in front of his mouth to prevent him from spitting steak "But why do you care?"

"Because he could be going through a bad time, I think we need to remember that he's only a fifteen year old" Ms. Marvel said with a wave of her hand "He's just a kid, as much as we like to forget that fact"

"But I urge you to not forget that we have our own fifteen year old intern who has done a hell of a lot more than Parker and she's completely fine" Fury said.

"You're talking about Jessica Drew right?" Steve asked "Just to cleat that up"

"She wouldn't be related to Jonathan Drew by any chance would she?" Peter asked.

"What's it to you?" a female voice snapped from behind him. Peter turned around to see a girl with back-length black hair and bright green eyes glaring furiously at him with a crate of Budweiser in her arms.

"Nothing much its just that the name came up in a file I was given to read by Fury..." Peter said, turning back around to look at Fury with an angry expression "Which I was disappointed with and came here to ask for the real version of it"

"Sorry kid, that's a no can do" Fury said "We don't give out classified files to interns"

"I've already fucking told you Fury that I'm not-"

"Wait a minute!" Jessica exclaimed furiously "He's a cadet!?"

"Yes" Fury nodded.

"No!" Peter disagreed.

"But... he's already been sent out on a field op with the team!" she growled, pointing an accusatory finger at Peter "I haven't even taken the Holo-Exam yet!"

"Holo-Exam?" Peter asked "That sounds like fun, what's the test about?"

"It tests the person's ability to make difficult decisions in a battle where they're outgunned and outnumbered" Widow called out.

"That's... that's the Kobayashi Maru test from Star Trek" Peter said with a cocked eyebrow "That's... I'm sure copying that is illegal Fury"

Nick didn't respond to that.

"Whatever, Sir I demand you tell me why he's allowed to go out on field ops when he's clearly untrained" Jessica said.

"You demand what cadet?" Fury said with a cold tone "I don't recall giving you permission to demand anything from me"

"Hang on a second, why do you call her a cadet and me an intern?" Peter asked, pointing a finger at Jessica.

"Because she's entered the S.H.I.E.L.D training academy and is training to become a S.H.I.E.L.D agent whereas you're training here to have your own solo career" Steve explained.

"Thanks Cap" Peter nodded.

"No problem Pete" Steve nodded in return, gesturing to Peter with his beer can.

"But isn't S.H.I.E.L.D supposed to be an off-the-record organization that nobody else knows about?" Peter asked "Yet there's a mother fucking academy set up for it?"

"Stop swearing" Jessica said quickly "Its immature" Peter turned to Jessica with a bewildered look on his face before opening his mouth and speaking.

"I don't even know you!" he snapped.

"Well so far you've made a very bad first impression" she said, turning away and crossing her arms. Peter then turned back to Fury and pointed across his chest at Jessica.

"Is she fucking with me?" he asked.

"You have got quite the potty-mouth Peter" Widow said with an agreeing nod.

"Look I didn't come here to be judged by you fuckers!" Peter yelled "Just give me the god-damn file and I'll leave!"

"What is the matter with you tonight Peter?" Ms. Marvel asked "You're not usually this sweary"

"Look, I've kinda had a shit day, I had to bail out on my friend, she hates me for that now, and I pissed off my other friend after she tried to defend me when the first friend was yelling at me and now she hates me" Peter explained, rubbing his eyes to relieve a little stress.

"Sorry to hear that kid, but that's not really our problem" Fury shrugged "So are you gonna help with the party or not?" Peter clenched his jaw, his temper flaring up and causing him to act out in reaction. He webbed the box of beer Jessica was carrying and yanked it out of her hands, catching it and then throwing it towards Fury.

"Whoa!" Steve said, standing up and reaching over the table, catching the crate and placing it down on the table. Steve was obviously angry at Peter's actions, pointing a finger at him as he barked an order.

"Parker, hit the gym, now!" Steve ordered.

"Fuck you Rogers, you don't own me" Peter hissed.

"You're out of line Parker" Steve growled "You either go work off your anger somewhere else or you get out of here and come back when you're willing to talk normally"

"Oh what the fuck's the point?!" Peter demanded "I'm not getting shit from you people because your cunt of a boss... you know what fuck it, I'm done" With that Peter pulled his mask back over his face and stormed out of the room.

"Wow" Jessica said with a disgusted look "That guy's a prick"

"Jessica" Ms. Marvel said sternly "Don't say that"

"Where does he get off talking to you guys like that?" she asked.

"He doesn't usually" Ms. Marvel said, shaking her head "I think I'm gonna go talk to him, see if I can't get through to him"

"Good luck with that" Widow chuckled "I get the feeling that kid's skull is thicker than his hair"

"Ooh, good one" Stark nodded.

"Thanks" Widow winked.


Ms. Marvel flew lower over the streets, her attention attracted by the sound of a gunshot followed by agonized screaming. She flew around a corner, emerging to see Spider-Man repeatedly slamming his fist into the face of a large man wearing a purple basketball jersey, several other men wearing similar colours lying badly beaten next to other men wearing orange jerseys.

"Spider-Man" Ms. Marvel called out to him, getting his attention before she ignored him and went back to beating the gang member he held "You're going to kill him"

"So?" he asked in a vicious tone.

"Put him down" Ms. Marvel said, walking over to him.

He didn't.

"Spider-Man" she repeated.

He still ignored her.

"Don't make me hurt you" she said "I came here to talk to you, not to fight, don't make this escalate" Spider-Man halted a punch for the gang member's face before throwing him aside, wiping the blood off his fist into the gang member's jersey and turning around to look at the taller woman.

"Leave me alone" he said, turning around and firing a web-line onto a nearby building. Ms. Marvel reached out and placed a hand on his shoulder, a compassionate look on her face.

"Spider-Man, can we just go somewhere quiet and talk?" she asked "You're not acting yourself"

"I'm fine" he grunted, not looking at her.

"Well seeing as how you just beat up an entire legion of gang members nearly to death and without a single joke thrown in there, I figure you're not being honest with that statement" Ms marvel retorted, placing a hand on her hip and looking at him "I'm trying to help you here"

"I don't need help" he spat.

"Everyone needs help kid" she responded "You're just not willing to accept it" There was a moment of silence between the two of them, the sounds of sirens not yet filling the air to respond to the shots fired moment earlier, before the loud noise of Spider-Man's stomach growling filled the night.

"You're hungry" Ms Marvel stated "How about we both get something to eat, on me?" Spider-Man obviously weighed the thought up in his mind before hanging his head, letting go of the web-line and turning around to face Ms Marvel.

"Alright then, where we eatin'?" he asked.

"I don't know about you..." she said, crossing her arms and placing her right hand up to her chin "I could go for a big, fat McDonalds right now" Spider-Man lowered his head with a chuckle before shrugging his shoulders.

"Sure, why not?" he asked.

"Come on then kid, let's get some food" Ms Marvel said patting him on the side of the face and floating off the ground, holding her hand out to Spider-Man "Need a lift?"

"No thanks, I got webs" he shrugged, leaping higher than she was floating and swinging off quickly, Ms Marvel catching up within a few seconds.

Sibling Assistance

Twilight snarled angrily as she lay on her bed, jabbing her thumb into the screen of her phone as she played a basic game of Doodle Jump, making one mistake that sent her falling to her death.

"Oh for fuck's sake!" she roared, throwing her phone onto the floor and slamming her face into her pillow, screaming loudly into the feather stuffed object. There was a moment of silence before Shining stuck his head in the door with a very confused look on his face.

"Wassup?" he asked.

Twilight's response was silence.

"Well, that helps" Shining said, walking over to the bed and sitting down on it, looking at his sister with a worried expression "Twilight?" She didn't respond and in his own response he began to prod her in the back.

"Twilight, Twilight, Twilight, Twilight, Twilight, Twilight, Twilight, Twilight, Twilight, Twilight, Twilight, Twilight, Twilight, Twilight, Twilight, Twilight, Twilight, Twilight, Twilight, Twilight, Twilight, Twilight, Twilight, Twilight, Twilight, Twilight, Twilight, Twilight, Twilight, Twilight, Twilight, Twilight, Twilight, Twilight, Twilight, Twilight, Twilight, Twilight, Twilight, Twilight, Twilight, Twilight, Twilight, Twilight, Twilight"

It was at this point she snapped.

"What!?" she shrieked "What the fuck do you want!?"

"Are you okay?" Shining asked.

"No, big brother I am not, fucking, okay" she said, literally seeping with anger.

"This... this isn't something to do with women's problems is it?" Shining asked with a horrified look on his face "Because I can get Cadance or Mom to talk to you about it if it is because... ew"

"That depends, are asshole friends counted as 'women's problems'?" Twilight asked. Shining's tone changed immediately upon hearing this. A wide smile spread onto his face as he sat with his back against the foot rest and nodded confidently.

"I think I know a thing or two about asshole friends my dear sister, so regale me, what is your problem?" he asked.

"Right, so Peter was at work with Mary-Jane, okay?" Twilight began.

"Right" Shining nodded.

"And while they're working, I call Peter to get him to help with the... bird situation" Twilight said, hoping her brother would understand her meaning.

"Uh-huh" he nodded again.

"So he does that, but then that means he's bailed out on her to go do his other job" she continued "So later on M-J gets really pissy with Peter and I step into the argument to defend him because she's a vain bitch"

"Whoa, hold up, I thought you two were friends?" Shining asked.

"We were for, like, uh... never mind that" Twilight said with a wave of her hand "So she yells at Peter a little more and storms off, so then I go to talk to him about it, expecting a thank you, and then he just up and says that I was too hard on her and that I shouldn't be mean to the slut"

"That's... that's a little excessive isn't it?" Shining asked.

"No, just looking at that red-headed bimbo tells me that she's probably sucked more cock than I've had hot dinners" Twilight said, sitting up and crossing her arms.

"Holy shit" Shining said, trying his best to hold back his laughter at Twilight's amazing description of Ms Watson before becoming serious again "So, then what?"

"Then I pretty much up and tell him to go fuck himself and to not talk to me any more" Twilight said, casting her eyes downwards with an obviously remorseful look "I'm... I'm not in the wrong here am I?"

"To be completely honest with Twilight, I have no fucking idea" Shining shrugged "Because as a man, if I were to be told that I was too hard on another guy in an argument by one of my friends I'd do one of two things, the first being tell him to go fuck himself and then carry on as normal or two would be to punch him in the face and carry on as normal"

"You... you can get away with that as a guy?" Twilight asked.

"Yes, having a penis makes life a lot easier" Shining nodded "And having a very big one like mine makes it better"

"Ewww!" Twilight cringed, shivering in disgust "Shining!" Her older brother laughed as he got to his feet, patting his sister on the shoulder.

"So that's it then?" Shining asked "Peter's being a cunt and you're mad at him for it, nothing more serious?"

"Nope... that's it" Twilight nodded.

"Well then, my advice to you, dearest sibling" Shining said, crouching down and placing a hand on a pillow before picking it up and pushing it into his sister's face "Stop being such a pussy" Twilight's response was an angry muffled noise before her brother pushed her over and stood up.

"See ya Twilight" he said with a wave as Twilight merely lifted her middle finger in response.

Nothing gained. Nothing lost. But one thing she now knew:

Peter was a cunt and she... was not.

Discussion Over Dinner

Spider-Man was stuck to a wall by his feet, resting his brown paper McDonalds bag on his knee as he munched away at his quarter pounder with Ms Marvel sitting cross legged a small distance away from him.

"That took way too long for them to make" Spider-Man said through a mouthful of fake McDonalds beef.

"Well it was hardly their fault, you ordered a completely plain quarter pounder, that's gotta take a lot to process in their usual work day" Ms Marvel said in their defence.

"How hard do you have to think to unravel the mystery of what 'Nothing but the burger and the bun' means in regards to how many dressings you should put on the burger?" Spider-Man asked.

"Ehhh" was her response, taking a sip of lemonade through her straw, continuing to speak after a pause "I can't believe they were out of strawberry milkshake"

"I can't believe you actually like that stuff" Spider-Man said with a shudder.

"What's not to like?" Ms Marvel asked with a gesture "Everything about them is delicious, the taste, the texture-"

"Texture my ass" Spider-Man interrupted with a point of a finger "I've never wondered what it would be like to drink liquid cement but after having one of those things I think I've got a pretty damn good idea"

"Now you're just exaggerating" Ms Marvel said, routing around in the paper bag for a few extra fries "Ooh, there's a few left in here"

"One of God's gifts right there, bag-fries" Spider-Man chuckled.

"Too true" she nodded. There was silence among the pair for a long moment, the sounds of the night-life below them keeping them company, Ms Marvel's eyes trailing up to see Spider-Man rest his head against the wall with a heavy sigh.

"You think you're ready to talk now?" she asked "Now that you've had your food?"

"Yeah, how much do I owe you for that?" Spider-Man asked.

"Like I said, it was on me" she answered "You don't need to pay me back"

"C'mon Carol, I'll feel shit if I don't" Spider-Man said, looking down at her.

"Just forget about it, it was a favour from me to you" she said "And that's that Peter"

"If you say so" Spider-Man said after a moment of deliberation.

"Good, now are you gonna tell me what's bothering you?" she asked, picking up her bag and scrunching it into a ball before using her power to set it on fire and burn it to ash.

"That's the thing... I can point out a few things that might be angering me but..." he began, laying his arms onto his knee and resting his forehead on his forearms.

"But?"

"But when I think about them they don't get any sort of emotion out of me" he finished "Its like... remember at school when you get into an argument or when someone said something to you that pissed you off, you'd feel, well, pissed off about it right?"

"Yeah?" Ms Marvel asked, wanting him to continue.

"Yeah, so then you'd have that emotion and it would, I don't know, make you feel angry, or you'd ball your fists and want to hit something... but when I think of what I've got going on I don't feel like it makes me angry but... but whenever I got into that argument, back there, I just fucking exploded" Spider-Man carried on, looking down at the blonde superhero "And I have no idea where the hell it came from, you know?"

"Yeah, yeah I know Peter" she nodded, resting an arm on her knee as she looked up at the rookie vigilante "I used to feel the same way about my Dad before he passed away"

"Really?" Spider-Man asked "How come?"

"Because he always preferred my younger brothers to me, even sent my idiot of a younger brother to college instead of me even though my grades were better than his" she said, looking down at her stomach "I despised my dad for how he used to treat them and then how he'd talk to me like I was an idiot, he was a sexist bastard and he took that to the grave"

"Whoa Carol" Spider-Man said in a surprised tone "You still sound pretty sore about it"

"That's because I am, but that's what I'm getting at, stress and anger don't have to be felt to be there" she said "You can be as happy as you want to be, having the best day ever and then the minute something pops up and annoys you, you just snap"

"Like I did?" Spider-Man asked.

"Yeah, like you did Peter" she nodded "But that's the problem with stress is that you think you can contain it, even when under pressure you think you can keep your cool, and when you realize you can't, its usally too late"

"So what am I supposed to do?" Spider-Man asked "How am I supposed to not blow my top every time someone looks at me sideways?"

"I can't say what'll work for you, but what helped me was talking to Steve" Ms Marvel suggested "He was always really good at just sitting down and listening to whatever was bothering me"

"Right, I don't think Steve is exactly my friend right about now" Spider-man sighed.

"Don't worry Peter, I've seen Steve when he's mad, and he wasn't angry at you" Ms Marvel said, giving him a supportive smile "He just wanted you to calm down before you did something stupid"

"I think I already did something stupid" he said with a nod of his head "And now I'm gonna have to go and apologize aren't I?"

"I think so" Ms Marvel nodded with a soft chuckle "Are you gonna do that now?"

"Nope, I'm gonna do the same thing every man does when he's wrong" Spider-Man said, looking down.

"Which is?" Ms Marvel asked.

"Ignore the fact and hope that everyone either forgets about it or they just stop caring" he answered.

"Admirable" Ms Marvel said, rolling her eyes with a chuckle.

The Best Cement FILLER In Town. Nothing FILLS IN SPACES Like This Here FILLER

Twilight tapped Harry on the shoulder as her boyfriend was examining games in the WiiU section of Gamestop, the girl having become slightly bored during his browsing time.

"What're you looking at?" Twilight asked, needing to stand on her tip-toes to see over his shoulder.

"Smash Bros 4" Harry said in a discontented tone.

"Wow, that sounded enthusiastic" Twilight nodded "Not a good game?"

"Ehhh, good for some people, just not for me" harry shrugged, putting the game down and stuffing his hands into his jacket pockets, continuing to browse the section.

"How come?" Twilight inquired.

"Two reasons; the first being I don't find the Smash Bros gameplay fun, I never found it as skill oriented as something like Killer Instinct or Street Fighter, the items acted as too much of a wildcard for me, even though you can turn them off I know" Harry explained "And the second reason is the fanbase"

"What's wrong with them?" she asked, picking up a copy Wind Waker HD.

"To put it bluntly, I find them to be a bunch of two-faced, hypocritical, stuck-up jackasses" Harry sighed.

"That's quite an opinion, where'd it come from?" she asked, checking the back of the box.

"It started a few years back when I heard a few die hard Smash fans at school ripping the hell out of COD for adding being nothing more than the same game released year after year with a few new maps and modes that have no thought put into them and completely lacking the care and attention Masahiro Sakurai"

"And your counter-opinion is?"

"These are the fans of the series that has been practically the same game every time its released with nothing more than a few new characters, a few fun modes that get boring after fifteen minutes and their attempt to add in a story to Brawl was nothing more than a side-scrolling level about how the bad guys were turning everyone into trophies, pretty much just an excuse to have stages and boss fights" Harry continued "They've even started taking characters out of sequels and removing maps that people loved"

"Are they the kind of people its impossible to reason with?"

"Oh yeah, they're basically just refined Nintendo fanboys and we all know how bad they are" Harry said.

"I don't, care to fill me in?"

"Well, you might know Nintendo as the gaming company single-handedly responsible for saving the video game industry?" Harry asked.

"Yeah?" Twilight nodded "And now?"

"And now they're starting to make the decisions in line with companies like EA and Activision, who've been in the practice of fucking over their consumer base for nearly a decade now" Harry said, putting Smash down and picking up the box for Bayonetta 2 "Nintendo has now starting issuing copyright strikes against Youtube channels for showing their games, which is basically free advertising for them, and then in an attempt to make peace, they made a new deal with the Youtubers which was that they had to pay them a large percentage of money to play their games and record them for their subscribers to see"

"And that's a bad thing?" Twilight asked, raising an eyebrow "Seems like a fair thing to do?"

"Does it really?" Harry asked "Lemme level with you for a second, let's put this practice into an actual conversation shall we?"

"... Alright, fine" Twilight nodded "What do I need to do?"

"Hey Twilight, you hear about Donkey Kong Country Returns?" Harry asked.

"No... what's Donkey Kong Country Returns?" she asked in a confused tone.

"Right, so that's twice we've mentioned a Nintendo product so we now owe them... twenty bucks each, let's say" Harry said.

"What?" Twilight asked "Why?"

"Because I mentioned something that's theirs, something I already paid for mind you, to someone who might want to buy it for themselves, more money for them by the way if I do convince you to buy it, so because they own the rights to it I need to pay them money for talking about it" Harry explained.

"But that's bullshit" Twilight said "If you convince em to buy it then they get my money without having to spend money on advertising!"

"I know, but they don't think that its fair for that, to have these Youtubers play their games in front of thousands, possibly millions of people, once again without having to pay them to do it, who might go out and buy the game they're playing" Harry said, moving into the Xbox section "Now if we take someone like Pewdiepie or maybe even Markiplier, VanossGaming or how about a reviewer like Angry Joe, who are Youtubers with over a million subscribers on their channels, Pewdie having just under thirty seven million subscribers and Joe being the least subscribed with just over two million"

"That's... that's a lot of people" Twilight said in shock.

"Oh yeah, now if we take a million people from each of them, say they all buy the same sixty dollar game, times sixty dollars by four millions and that gives Nintendo a nice little profit of..." Harry said, doing the math inside his head "Two-hundred and forty million dollars"

"Holy shit" Twilight said, her eyes wide as dishes "That is a lot of money"

"Eh, chump-change really, but if this all happens once a day, every day for a year, we times two-hundred and forty million by three-hundred and sixty-five then we end up with a round sum of eighty-seven billion, six-hundred million dollars per annum" Harry worked out "Now this is where we're talking some serious money"

"Now we're talking hypothetically here, that kind of money coming in every year would be enough for Nintendo to end bail America out of debt in about twenty years, but still, that is a fuck-ton of money" Twilight nodded "And didn't you say that that wasn't even their entire fanbase"

"Yup, if my figures are correct, Pewdie is about to hit thirty-seven million subs, Vanoss closing in on thirteen million, Markiplier getting close to eight million and Joe on his way to three million, we add all those people together... that gives us sixty-two million people, times that by sixty and then that by three-hundred and sixty five?"

Twilight ran the math through her head before  her face hit the floor, realizing the money this company could make.

"That brings us to... one trillion, three-hundred and fifty-seven billion, eight-hundred million dollars per annum" Twilight said.

"Now, its all theoretical as that many people will never be able to throw that kind of money at Nintendo due to things like lack of income, budgeting on poorer families, lack of console access or outright stinginess, but in a perfect world they could be making that kind of money by allowing Youtubers, and only these Youtubers to show their games free of charge" Harry continued.

"But they're charging people?" she asked.

"Yes, but that's not the only thing they're doing, they're also forcing Youtubers to submit their videos for approval by a Nintendo representative themselves, which means that they have to wait several days, even a week for their video to be checked and approved, with revenue taken off it, and bearing in mind that Youtube is some people's full time job and that the Youtube crowd will find somebody else to watch if you're not uploading means that on top of the huge viewers base you're losing, which means less money earned by add revenue which barely anybody clicks on, they're having money taken off them" Harry explained.

"And what if this Nintendo guy doesn't like the video?" she asked.

"Then it doesn't go up and you lose all the money you could've gotten as well as a possible copyright strike against your channel, and three of those means it gets deleted" Harry shrugged.

"Wow... Nintendo are assholes" Twilight whistled.

"Strangely enough though, Nintendo of America gets that this is a mistake and they're willing to take this system down and give more back to the people, but its Nintendo of Japan that are fucking things up for everyone, just a bunch of old, greedy, Japanese men who can't see that Youtube is helping boost sales" Harry continued "And now several Youtubers have started boycotting Nintendo so their huge viewer base isn't getting exposed to these new games and aren't buying them"

"So they lose money?" Twilight asked "I think I'm getting this now"

"Nope, they don't lose a cent" Harry stated with a fake grin.

"What?" Twilight asked "Why?"

"Because like I said, Nintendo fanboys are as stupid as they are loyal, they're under the impression that Nintendo cares about their consumer base when for the past ten years they've done nothing but fuck them over, but because they used to be the 'best company ever' their sheep as still loyal to their master"

"Wow... that's really depressing" Twilight said.

"Yep, gamers are fucking idiots who don't realize they're only hurting themselves" Harry chuckled "That's why I've never seen Nintendo as the best company ever"

"And who do you think is?" Twilight asked, picking up a copy of Battlefield 3, reading the back of the box.

"I think its quite obvious, Rockstar Entertainment" Harry said, picking up a copy of GTA 5 and stroking it affectionately.

"Huh" Twilight said, crossing her eyes "I don't even think you like me that much"

"Do you let me load up with guns and murder people on the street?" Harry asked, Twilight grabbing hold of his hand and smiling sweetly at him.

"I would, but then I'd have to share you with those mean men in prison" she giggled, kissing him on the cheek and walking past him "Now come on, its my turn to shop and rant about useless shit"

"Where are we going?" he asked, following after her.

"Underwear shopping" she answered.

"Awesome, just don't sneak off without me when we're there" Harry requested "I don't quite feel looking like a sex-pest today"

Plan Formulated. Awaiting Execution.

"Alright J.A.R.V.I.S, get me up the floor plans for Oscorp's main tower and throw in any extra 'Off the record' schematics you can scrounge up while you're at it" Tony said, sticking his spoon into the tub of ice cream he was eating.

"Dude, that can't be good for you" Peter said, eyeing up the cookie dough ice cream with a suspicious eye.

"Ice cream makes me a happy boy, you're not gonna take that away from me are you?" Tony asked "Oh, and before you answer remember that the turrets still operate down here"

"Well then, let's let Tony be as happy a boy as he wants to be" Peter said, holding his arms up in surrender.

"Good decision" Tony nodded, bringing up a hologram of the floor plans of Oscorp Tower, seeing that every detail was mapped out down to the electric current direction and laser lines of the automatic doors "Now this is a floor plan"

"Did you get this thing off the internet?" Peter asked "Because it seems kind of suicidal to have the bare bones of your high-tech company available on Pinterest"

"Well, not exactly off the internet... more like Norman Osborn's Cloud service" Tony chuckled.

"And this is why I don't trust the Cloud to store anything" Peter sighed "Too many loopholes and access points for anything secure to be kept in there"

"You're worried they'll find your freaky porn?" Tony asked.

"Isn't everyone?" Peter asked in response.

"True" Tony nodded, turning back to the hologram, pointing his middle finger at a small, dark area on the hologram "And here is what we're looking for"

"Wow, a section of Oscorp that is literally off the books" Peter said in an impressed tone "How do they hide it from the tax payers?"

"I can search for that if you wish?" J.A.R.V.I.S asked from the speakers.

"No thanks bud, maybe later" Tony said to his friend, giving a thumbs up sign.

"Very well" the A.I responded kindly.

"So this is the spot we're looking for?" Peter asked "Seems like a very glaring flaw for the plans to show this area"

"I know... unless..." Tony said, humming with thought "J.A.R.V.I.S, can you get me the original blueprints for the tower when it was commissioned?"

"Of course sir" J.A.R.V.I.S said, going quiet for a second before an image popped up on the computer screen, getting both men to look at it. Tony browsed through the different pages before he came to the endoskeleton of the tower, seeing what he was hoping for.

"Here we are, the original plans say that this big space on the hologram is where the power station was gonna be built" Tony said before pointing at the top of the tower on the hologram "But as we can see from the directional indication of the power currents, they start at the top of the tower and make their way to the bottom... you know what that means?"

"That they lied about the position of the generator and moved it to the top, leaving a very large, open space in the basement for all kinds of evil schemes to take place" Peter nodded "But there's one thing I'm wondering"

"Which is?" Tony asked.

"The tower was commissioned by Norman's Father, Grandaddy Osborn, before Smythe was even alive... so why would he leave an enormous space in the bottom of his tower for evil schemes that hadn't even started yet?" Peter asked.

"Preparation for evil schemes?" Tony suggested "I have no idea, and it doesn't seem relevant right now... say, did you get a a chance to talk to that thief friend of yours did you?"

"Nope, sorry" Peter said with a shake of his head "I can't find her anywhere"

"Damn... so its just gonna be you going in there" Tony sighed.

"Whoa, whoa, hold up" Peter said in a surprised tone "When did we say it was me going in to begin with?"

"I never brought that up?" Tony asked.

"Not that I remember" Peter said, crossing his arms "What exactly am I gonna be doing?"

"Right, so what we've managed to figure out is that Smythe is storing all the data he has on the Iron Man suits in a secluded server that only operates inside the Oscorp tower" Tony explained.

"Which is why I need to go in" Peter nodded.

"Wow, and they say the younger generation is full of idiots" Tony said in a faux impressed tone "How wrong were they?"

Peter glared angrily at Stark for a second before the older man chuckled and continued to explain.

"Yes, that's why, and once you're in their you're going to use the small program I've written up to hack into the mainframe of the tower, which is linked into all employee accounts, to gather all the data on the Iron Man suits" Tony said "And then you're going to delete it all, once that's done the program'll create a Trojan Horse virus that'll replace the data, so the next time he accesses the files for the suit it'll release the virus and cripple the Oscorp system, letting Stark Industries get a nice little profit boost and the price of our stock's should go up a smidge"

"That's... That's really dickish Stark" Peter said in a surprised tone.

"Rule number one of business kid: Take any chance you can to get ahead of the competition" Tony chuckled.

"Alright... so how am I gonna go about getting in?" Peter asked "I figure they're not just gonna let me waltz in and give me access to their mainframe"

"Right you are, that's why you're gonna go in dressed for work" Tony nodded "There's an access tunnel... well, a ventilation shaft that's used to circulate cold air from outside around the building to keep the wire-work cool and functional"

"Huh, good to know that the Oscorp Tower has the same weakness as the Death Star" Peter nodded.

"Not exactly, its in a place that no normal human should be able to access" Tony said, flipping the hologram around to show Peter where the vents were, on the underside of the landing pad installed on the roof of the building.

"Pfff" Peter scoffed "Like that's gonna stop me"

"That's what I like to hear" Tony nodded.

"Then what's the plan for the exit after I'm done?" Peter asked.

"The same way you got in if it all goes well" Tony answered "If nothing fucks up you should be in and out within ten minutes, tops"

"Good... no security to speak of?" Peter asked, making sure to cover all the bases "Cameras, lasers?"

"None, the ventilation tunnel runs straight down to the main hub of the building where the servers are kept, supposedly out of reach to humans" Tony answered.

"Well then, it'll be good to prove them wrong" Peter chuckled "I'll go suit up, how soon can you get your virus ready?"

"Thirty seconds at most" Tony responded.

"Good to hear" Peter grinned "I'll be back"

Smythe's Plan

"Can you hear me kid?" Tony asked through the piece of technology he'd been given. It was a small piece of wiring on a clear piece of plastic that was placed inside his ear, resting against his ear canal.

"Crystal" Spider-Man nodded, sliding the hatch he'd moved back into place, using the tip of his fingers to twist the screws into place "This thing works really well"

"Yeah, we're gonna be mass-producing it next year" Stark answered "Haven't come up with a name for it yet though, we're thinking of something cartoony and cheesy, like the Ear-spionage device"

"Run me through how this thing works and I'll see what name I can think of" Spider-Man nodded, grinning under his mask as he already had the name picked out.

"Right, so its a small device that uses top-of-the-line micro-technology to transmit and receive audio signals of multiple programmable frequencies ranging from radio stations to walkie-talkies" Star began "Its big feature is that instead of a speaker its able to directly stimulate the inner bones of your ear without vibrating the air around it, which is what makes the sound. Bear in mind that you still have to speak aloud to get it to read you, but I can talk into your ear all day long without somebody else hearing it"

"Right, yeah, I got a name" Spider-Man said.

"Alright then kid, hit me" Stark responded.

"The Codec" Spider-Man answered, grinning widely under his mask.

"The... Codec?" Stark asked, the sound of him drumming his fingers on his desk being audible to Spider-Man "Why the Codec?"

"No reason, it just works" Spider-Man shrugged, sliding down the wall he stuck too and into the wiring hatch, immediately feeling the heat hit seep through his suit "Christ Stark its hot in here, you sure this cooling under-armour's gonna work?"

"Don't worry about it, its made from the same technology that my Deep-Magma Iron Man suit's made from" Stark said confidently "It'll kick in soon and you'll feel nice and cool"

"Alright, I'll trust you on this one" Spider-Man nodded, sliding further and further down into the ventilation chamber.

True to Stark's word, the under-armour he wore began to feel cool against his body and he stopped perspirating.

"Uhhh, Tony?" Spider-Man asked, a small thought occurring to him.

"Yeah?" Tony asked.

"I know the under-armour'll keep my cool and stop me from burning to a crisp but... won't the heat still fuck up my costume?" he asked.

Tony didn't need to answer that as he felt his suit begin to tighten against his body as it shrivelled up.

"Oh great" Spider-Man sighed, hearing a loud tear as the armpit area of the suit split at the seams from his movement "Fuck"

"What's up?" Tony asked "Your Spidey duds haven't set alight yet, have they?"

"Oh shit" Spider-Man growled "I forgot that could happen"

He halted himself on the wall and breathed a heavy sigh as he tore his beloved suit away from his body and casting it down into the vent. It fell several long metres before it set alight with a loud crackle, the glove of the suit angled upwards, as if it were a hand reaching up to be saved.

"I love you" Peter called down to the burning mass of cloth.

"Oh for fuck's sake kid, its a suit, not a person" Tony growled "Get over it"

"Its not just a suit... it was my baby" Peter said, dragging his finger down his cheek to mimic a tear falling.

"Just be lucky I didn't give you the under-armour that has a clear face, you'll still have your secret identity" Tony commented.

Peter nodded, looking at the all black under-armour he wore with lenses that Stark had redesigned to look like his Spider-Man costume's while still covering his face. He slid further down into the shaft before another thought occurred to him.

"Wait, how did we manage to think of my web-shooters exploding from the heat... and not my suit setting on fire?" Peter asked, patting his backside where a pouch made of the same heat-resistant material as his new suit rested, the web-shooters inside to keep them safe.

"Call it a brain fart?" Tony suggested.

"Fair enough" Peter nodded "You'll make me a new suit, right?"

"No" Tony answered.

"Thanks bud" Peter growled, sliding further down to a panel that was strangely reflective. He looked at himself with a critical eye, seeing the white eye-lenses going quite well with the plain black suit.

"Did I tell you that I considered black as a colour for the suit?" Peter asked, blowing a kiss at himself before dropping several metres "Red and black were the original colours but... I felt they were a bit stu-ish"

"What?" Tony asked "The fuck does that mean?"

"Sorry, internet term, you wouldn't get it" Peter said "Though... if you ever go onto a website called Tumblr and find an anime character creator, don't make it red and black and give it a katana, that really fucks people off"

"Duly noted" Tony said.

"But yeah, I was originally gonna make the suit red and black, then just plain black... then I threw in a little white and boom, I had the first suit I liked" Peter continued.

"Why did you change it?" Tony asked.

"I thought it looked more like a villain's suit, the colours were really sinister and the spider design I'd put together... it was a little too dark and edgy" Peter explained "You know what I mean?"

"I guess... would you make it now?" Tony asked offhandedly.

"What d'you mean?" Peter asked, sliding down to the bottom of the ventilation chamber and dropping into a low crouch.

"Would you wear it now, for a change of pace?" Tony asked "I've done that with my suits a few times, given them a new paint-job when I felt like a change"

"Maybe... if I didn't have any other choice I figure I would, for a while" Peter shrugged.

"What if I made it for you?" Stark queried "And gave it a few upgrades?"

"If you it makes me better at being Spider-Man then fuck what it looks like, I'd keep the son-of-a-bitch for good" Peter nodded before growing serious again "Right, I'm at the bottom of the vent, now what?"

"Alright, there should be a hatch under a few thick wires near you that leads to the information hub of the building, just plug in the virus to the USB port and stand around for a few minutes" Tony instructed.

"And what about the probe you gave me?" Peter asked "Your little 'All Your Data Are Belong To Us' machine you gave me?" Peter asked.

"Obviously you plug it into another port and steal as much company data as you can" Tony answered.

"Yeah, obviously" Peter nodded "Alright then Colonel, Snake out"

"What?" Stark asked before Peter tapped his ear and ended the transmission. Peter carefully spread the cables apart and found the hatch he was looking for.

After prying it open with his fingers he ducked inside and landing next to a large server stack.

"Alright then Parker... find a computer terminal, plug in these little devils and break Oscorp" Peter said aloud "Let's just hope this doesn't put them out of business, cuz Harry will be mad... that and I'd make the stock market to all wiggedy-whack and make crazy things happen, like the saying 'wiggedy-whack' making a comeback" After palming his own forehead for saying such a nineties phrase he made his way through the server stacks until he came to the access terminal.

"Bingo" Peter said before catching himself again "'Bingo' cliche, ding!"

He walked over to the terminal and, after routing around for the hidden USB ports, he plugged the two devices in and took a step back, looking around and waiting for the alarm and/or security bots and/or laser beams and/or all of the above to attack him.

After nothing did he breathed a sigh of relief, the terminal lighting up and a progress bar appeared as it began to display graphics of files being taken and moved into a graphic of the USB stick.

"Who... who coded and sprited this?" Peter asked "I don't know a single OS that has files being stolen as an actually programmed graphic... especially an animated one too"

Casting aside his peculiar question he stood around for several minutes before a file was automatically opened, displaying several projects that were marked as 'Classified'

"Holy shit, whoever programmed this fucking U.I needs to be fired, its giving away company secrets without even asking for a password?" Peter asked, crossing his arms "That's oddly convenient... almost... scripted in a way"

He looked over his shoulder to make sure there was no Wallrider or final boss sneaking up on him, his own paranoia making him nervous, before he turned back to the computer and two files were blinking on screen.

One was labelled the M.G Project and the second was was labelled as the Silvermane Project.

"Gee willickers Batman, I wonder what the second project involves?" Peter said in an ironic tone "You know, just for curiosity's sake, let's access the M.G project and see what Metal gear model they're building"

Peter tapped on the touch screen where the icon for the file was and was surprised to hear that a Siri-esque voice announce the full name of the file.

"Greetings Engineer, opening selected file" the voice said "Metal Gear Zeon"

"What. The. Fuck!?" Peter exclaimed, flicking though several blueprints and artist renditions of an exact copy of Metal Gear Ray, complete with removed Hydro-Cutter and replaced with a plasma cannon "They are actually building a Metal Gear!?"

Peter flicked through several more files on the project, seeing official government signed research grants, building permissions and areas in the Mojave Desert dedicated to testing the machine's weapon capabilities all paid for and signed by... Princess Luna.

He frantically scanned through the blueprints contrasted against the written descriptions of the Metal gear model's capabilities, noticing that the person who had written the description had conveniently left out the Gear's ability to launch nukes, something that was clearly displayed on the blueprints.

"Who builds a Metal Gear!?" Peter demanded in utter bewilderment "And I don't mean steal the idea of one, who literally takes the design and name of a video game super-weapon and creates it!?"

He jabbed a finger into his covered ear, still getting his finger to touch the Codec, causing it to activate and call the only programmed frequency it had.

"What's up?" Stark asked through a mouthful of food.

"Google something right now" peter ordered.

"Hang on, I'm in the middle-" Stark began.

"Stark!" Peter barked "Now!"

"Alright... what d'you want me to look up?" Stark asked.

"Metal gear Ray" Peter answered.

"Why?" Stark questioned.

"Just. Do. It" Peter spat.

"Fine" Stark said, going quiet for a second before his voice came back in "Uh... its a robot from a video game... why is this so important?"

"Because Oscorp are building one" Peter answered.

"Bullshit" Stark said in a disbelieving tone.

"No, I'm not making this up" Peter said "I've got the plans for this thing right in front of me and... hang on"

Peter looked at a piece of information on the first page of information that brought a wave of realization over him.

"What year was the Oscorp Tower commissioned?" Peter asked.

"Well... I think it was first planned in... eighty-six, but after a massive redesign in eighty-seven the tower was postponed for building for the next year, after the new plans were finalized" Stark described "Why is that important?"

"Because on July seventh nineteen-eighty-seven a little game was released on the MSX2 known as Metal Gear... can you remember the date the redesign was started?" Peter asked.

"September that year I think" Stark said "You're not seriously trying to tell me that Alexander Osborn played through that video game and saw this... Metal Gear thing and decided to restructure he entire tower just to build it?" Stark asked "That's insane!"

"Well unless this file comes up as a joke to trick thieves like us, then I've got every sign, light and announcement telling me that the tower was finished in ninety-two and the research phase on their own Metal Gear, officially backed by Princess Luna herself"

"This has to be bullshit, why the fuck would Luna put money behind a video game robot?" Stark asked, still not convinced.

"Because she didn't know it was from a video game, remember that this was when video games weren't a mainstream icon, no high ranking government official would be caught buying, playing or even discussing a SNES or and NES in public" Peter explained "And you're forgetting that this project was pitched a year after the end of the Cold War, where America and Russia had both reduced the amount of nuclear weapons they'd made to secure peace"

"And what you're saying is?"

"I'm saying can you imagine how good it would sound to the leaders of a country that had just lost a considerable amount of their biggest weapons in a deal with their enemy only to have some guy come along and tell you that you can not only restock your nuclear arsenal but you can do it while creating a new series of tanks with nuke launching capabilities from anywhere on the Earth's surface?" Peter asked.

"What!?" Stark exclaimed "It can do that?!"

"The original Metal Gear model was able to stock at least three nuclear missiles, the design I'm looking at for Ray shows him able to carry three sets of fifteen missile launchers, each nuclear and able to switch out on a rotary system installed in his back" Peter described "And since this would be classified as a black project it would go unspoken of to the public so nobody would bring up the fact that Hideo Kojima created the machine and could sue them for copyright... and make their corporate backers realize how dangerous this thing was, seeing as how they didn't say he could launch nukes"

"How many have they built so far?" Tony asked.

"Luckily none" Peter answered.

"Wait, they've been building this thing for nearly thirty years and still haven't finished it?" Tony asked "How the hell does that work?"

"Because the technology they use keeps getting upgraded, the original plans they showed for this thing were from the original Metal gear model in nineteen-eighty-seven, they've upgraded its design to match Metal Gear Ray's and he didn't show up until two-thousand and two in the Metal Gear Solid series" Peter explained "And it says on the file that they'd scheduled this thing to be deployed into Afghanistan to help fight the war over there in twenty-twelve"

"Did they?" Tony asked.

"No, they put it back into production down to a 'Error in the targeting system'" Peter said "Though I think I know why they didn't deploy it"

"Why?" Stark asked.

"What big technological advancement happened a few years earlier?" Peter asked "What changed the field of mobile, human-operated machinery?"

"Two-thousand-and seven" Stark said in horror "The second Iron Man suit I built when I went up against Obediah... the government demanded I hand over the plans to the suit as a military project"

"Which I'm guessing would've been given to Oscorp to help them finalize their super-weapon" Peter nodded.

"And when I said no... they started stealing the suits after they found out they were being produced somewhere else... replicating the technology for their big super-weapon and selling the knock-offs to the criminal underworld as a way to cover costs and hide their tracks" Tony said, the realization hitting both of them.

"And when I bumped into Smythe in the elevator in this building he said that when his work was complete there'd be no need for artificial intelligence... because his work would change the world" Peter said "And we've seen that your newer suits are able to be piloted without anyone inside them"

"And you give that power to a walking nuclear power house that's covered in the same material I use for the suits" Stark began.

"You've got a killing machine that can't be stopped, and if its put into mass production like its planned to be, possibly with hundreds of trained pilots at your command-" Peter continued.

"And if you use the I.D lock software I use on my suits... you've got your own little army of nearly indestructible super-weapons that can turn on their commanders"

"Order sixty-six style" Peter nodded "We can't let them do that"

"But how do we know that's what they're doing?" Stark asked "They could genuinely be doing this to help America, we can't take that risk without knowing more"

Peter browsed through several more files before coming across a list of names, countries and prices. His jaw dropped when he realized what was going on underneath the tower. Not only was Luna's signature present but so were the ones from other countries rulers, Saudi Arabia, Russia, Iran, Iraq, South America, Korea, China, Japan.

"Stark!" Peter yelled in horror.

"What?" Stark demanded "What is it?"

"I've got pitches, meetings and signings from at least thirteen other countries that bought into the idea of Oscorp's Metal Gear production and he's sold them to so many different world leaders its not even funny, and he tricked each one into thinking they're the only ones with access to the new tech" Peter explained.

"Oh shit... this is bad" Stark growled.

"And it gets worse, Smythe's planning to use the machines like I said, Order Sixty-Six style and turn them all against the leaders of the countries that've bought them" Peter carried on "He's... he's planning to take over the world with them"

"So then get the data on that USB and bring it here to me, then maybe we can go to Celestia and show her what's really happening" Stark said.

"And then what?" Peter asked "We obtained this data illegally, Smythe's, hell, Osborn's lawyers could just say that we broke into their private building, stole classified documents not meant for public consumption and then say we created more documents to try and get them arrested"

"Fuck" Stark growled "Fuck!"

"We have to do something... I'll try and talk to Celestia, maybe Luna, to try and make her see reason, see if either of them'll be willing to listen" Peter said quickly.

"Then get your ass back here with that data boy, then upload the Trojan and get the fuck out of there!" Stark said before catching himself "Though something as big as this probably isn't just saved in this one location... damn it all"

"Right, I'll be back soon" Peter said, seeing that the progress bar for both the M.G Project and the Silvermane Project were complete. He removed the USB and accessed the Trojan virus, seeing it infect the files before burying itself away.

He removed the USBs and made his way back to the hatch he'd entered through, moving as fast as possible, as if the world depended on him.

Which it did.

More Bad News

Spider-Man kicked the vent out of it's place, completely forgetting that there was no floor for it to land on except the street quite a way down.

"Uhhh..." he said, watching the metal plate sail towards the ground, knowing that he should do something about it, sucking in a deep breath and filling his lungs before performing his amazing superhero move.

"Heads up!" he hollered down to the citizens who could... probably hear him, and if they couldn't... well that was their fault and he was not at liberty or responsibility for any injuries they may or may not receive during their contracted work hours.

"I really am the best superhero in the world" he chuckled to himself, crawling out of the vent and sticking to the underside of the helipad on top of the tower. He reached into the secure package on his back and pulled out his web-shooters, fitting them back onto his wrists and smiling under his mask.

Then a small wave of nausea washed over him, not a warning of sorts but more of a notification from his Spider-Sense, telling him that something was dangerous, but not to him at that moment.

And that dangerous thing was right above him.

"What's hip-hop happening on the flipside home-bizzle?" he asked aloud before he repeated what he had just said in his mind, a slow breath leaving his lungs as he closed his eyes in disappointment "Just let go, fall and accept the sleep, you'd be doing the world a favour by leaving it after that quality fucking line"

He crawled along the underside of the helipad, keeping his eyes aimed down towards the streets for any sign of red splashes or ambulances having to call in whatever code for 'Removing an air vent from a patient's head' was.

Luckily there was no such occurrence for him to worry about and he stuck his head over the edge of the helipad, his eyes locking on to the extremely dangerous-looking helicopter.

The weapon itself was a very large, very smooth and very dangerous helicopter with large rotors, big, round exhausts on the front above the cockpit and a powerful weapon arsenal including, what looked like, high-calibre machine guns, rocket launchers and laser-tracking missiles.

"Mil Mi-24" Spider-Man said, reading the name on the side of the helicopter, recognizing the name but not knowing from where before a light clicked on in his head, causing him to realize that eh knew it under another name "A Hind D? What's a Russian gunship doing here?"

Crawling up onto the helipad, laying flat on his stomach, he scuttled across the floor before sticking to the back of the chopper, keeping his feet off the ground.

He leaned his head around the Hind's back to see three people exiting the building and walking across the rooftop, one of them being recognizable to Spider-Man.

"Osborn" he growled, not sure what the man was up to.

The other two people stood out considerably from the green and black colour scheme of the Oscorp tower. The first wearing dirty white suit pants and a white coat, seeming a strange outfit to be wearing in the summer sun.

Spider-Man had a feeling about who this woman was, just from looking at her hair colour, the same white colour as Black Cat's.

"The Silver Sable" he muttered under his breath, his eyes then trailing to the smaller and younger looking girl, looking to be the same age as him, also with white hair.

The younger girl wore a school uniform, meaning that she went to an expensive private school somewhere in New York State, her uniform being a black, knee-length skirt with a white shirt, grey tie and a grey suit jacket, this one obviously tailored to her figure.

"Sister or daughter?" he asked himself.

"Mother, can we go now?" the girl asked in an impatient manner.

"Just a moment Silver honey, I'm not done yet" the older woman responded, her voice accompanied by her thick Russian accent.

"That explains the chopper" Spider-Man nodded, moving his head out of sight and merely listening to the conversation.

"Now Mr Osborn, are you sure that the project will be completed in time for my father's release from prison?" the older woman asked "He intends to claim back what he has lost from our new friend"

"I assure you Mrs Sablinov, we will have your father's order completed before he arrives on our doorstep" Osborn answered in his usual slimy tone "After all, I need the Silvermane to get rid our my business partner as quickly as possible"

"Then if, and yes, that is an if not a when, you deliver on your promise I'll make sure all evidence of your... misdemeanours are erased" she said before placing a hand on Norman's chest "And, if you're willing, a few extra benefits"

Norman looked down at her hand with a raised eyebrow before brushing it off his chest with a disgusted look.

"I'd like to remind you, once, that I am a married man" Norman said "I have a wife that I love and a son that I'm proud of, and though I may not seem like the most caring man in the world, my heart belongs to my dearest wife Emily, so no Sablinov, you can keep your extra benefits"

Sablinov was obviously displeased by his answer, curling her fist and putting it down by her side before her daughter called back to her.

"Are we done now?" she asked impatiently.

"Yes honey" she answered, turning away from Osborn and walking back towards the Hind.

"Time to beat a heated retreat" Spider-Man said, pushing off the Hind and throwing himself off the edge of the tower.

Firing a web line to a nearby building stopped his descent, using the tension on the web to throw himself forward and onto another rooftop. Landing with a soft roll he dropped onto his haunches, sitting still and resting a elbow on his knee.

"The Silver Sable, she's not in prison?" he asked himself "And she's waiting for her dad to get out of the slammer, that guy being Silvermane... and both her and Osborn have put their chips down on this new project their building? The one I just stole the plans for?"

A grin spread underneath his mask as he tapped his ear, activating the Codec module and waiting for Stark to answer.

"What's up?" Stark asked as he answered.

"Nothing much, just a quick update, the Silver Sable's working with Osborn and I think they're planning to get Silvermane to go head-to-head with the Big Man" Spider-Man said "Sounds like they're gonna kick off a gang-war"

"Not to sound like a dick kid, but this city's your problem, so you have to deal with it" Stark said "Not that it's gonna be a problem for the Amazing Spider-Man, right?"

"Not at all, I just have to get in between two of the biggest criminal names in the history of the world, one of which has the entire state wrapped around his finger and the other seems to have some serious connections behind him, and all that's standing between them and wrecking the city for ownership is a hundred and twenty five pound, five-seven kid in a spider-suit" Spider-Man said, putting his face in his hands "Yeah, no problem"

"Good to hear" Tony chuckled "Stark out"

Spider-Man sat quietly for a long moment before lying down on the ground, curled up in the foetal position with his eyes staring into nothing.

"I want my Mommy" he said to himself, beginning to rock back and forth slowly.

Whistleblowing

Luna froze in her office, her hand on the doorknob as she felt a slight breeze behind her.

Turning around slowly she saw one of her least favourite sights, the now strangely black clad Spider-Man crouching on the windowpane.

"What do you want?" she demanded impatiently.

"I wanna have a little chat with you about a few video games Your Majesty" he said, dropping down onto the floor and standing up straight.

"You're not serious?" she asked in a disbelieving tone "There is no way you've trespassed onto my private property to talk to me about some boring little pass-time of yours"

"Indeed I did, and I wanna recommend a good one to you" Spider-Man said, reaching into the pack he had at his side and throwing the item he withdrew from it over to Luna's feet.

"I know it's the fourth one in the series, and like the... sixth or seventh in the franchise, but it's still a good thing to play" he said with a shrug.

Luna was reluctant to take her eyes off the so-called superhero, her blue orbs locked onto the white eyes of the mask.

After several moments she knelt down and picked up the case, flipping it over and reading the title.

"What... what is this?" she asked in horror "Where did you get this!?"

"That my dearest princess is a copy of Metal Gear Solid Four: Guns of the Patriots" Spider-Man answered "And as for where I got it? I bought it at a Gamestop a few years back along with the Metal Gear Solid Hd Collection, and the story you may ask, involves an American Special Forces soldier being tasked with taking down a secret black project name Metal Gear, a nuclear-equipped, bipedal walking tank that's key feature is the ability to launch a nuke from anywhere in the world"

Luna was silent, her mind racing with so many different questions and responses, the one she elected to use was to throw the case against a wall as hard as she could, the plastic shattering and destroying the disk inside it.

"I'm guessing that you're not too happy about the fact the black project the U.S has been developing for nearly thirty years is just a real life version of a video game final boss?" he asked calmly "I would be pissed too if I were you"

"How... how did you know about that project?" Luna asked "Nobody outside of the Pentagon is supposed to know about that"

"Because I did a little digging and found out that there's quite a few people that know about the M.G project, quite a few in other countries" Spider-Man answered "Those people happen to be heads of government in places like China, Japan, Korea and a whole load of other places that I'm nearly positive you don't want having access to the Metal Gear arsenal... then again, Arsenal Gear was actually in the games... then it was modified to be Outer Haven... which isn't to be confused with Outer Heaven, those are two different things entirely"

"What the hell are you talking about?" Luna demanded impatiently.

"Just the Metal Gear lore, give me your email address and I'll send you a few links to some sites that help break it down into more manageable bits, especially the bits with how Ocelot becomes Liquid Ocelot, cause two explained it that he was possessed by the spirit of Liquid Snake after he'd had his arm grafted onto him when Gray Fox had cut it off on Shadow Moses and three backs up this theory by saying that because Ocelot is the son of the Sorrow, a guy who was in the Cobra unit in WWII who could contact the dead, he was more inclined to spiritual contact himself"

Luna remained completely still during the explanation, her jaw hanging down slightly as the masked man took a deep breath and continued his seemingly psychotic rant.

"But, the fourth game in the franchise, the one you just destroyed for shits and gigs explains it a completely different way in that Ocelot used nanomachines and hypnotherapy to give himself a split personality, that being Liquid Ocelot, and he then brainwashed his own split personality into thinking that it was Liquid Snake possessing Ocelot's body while at the same time having a third personality that would take back control of Ocelot's real personality if Liquid Ocelot was defeated" he finished "At least I think that's how it worked... the ending cutscene to four was like an hour and twenty minutes and I was still tired from crying about Snake being blasted in the microwave corridor to really pay that much attention"

Luna slowly walked over to the superhero, his mind not focussing on her actions but was too focussed on trying to remember this homeless person's fever dream hew was describing in too much detail for it to be made up on the spot.

He took another breath to continue speaking about something called the Patriots before Luna slapped him across the face, causing him to fall silent and look at her with a shocked expression.

"Why did you do that?" he asked.

"You're really fucking annoying, you know that?" she asked "I feel like my brain is slowly committing suicide just to make me stop listening to that"

"It's a really good storyline, I think Kojima really outdid the competition-"

His Spider-Sense went off to warn him but Luna moved too fast, her other hand connecting with his left cheek and sounding with a loud smack.

"Well..." he whimpered in pain "At least the hand prints are gonna be even"

Luna then cocked back her fist and punched him in the nose, a loud crack sounding as his head rocketed back and took him off his feet, his head slamming against the windowpane.

"No, you ruined my feng shui!" he groaned in agony, Luna crouching over his waist and grabbing hold of him by the throat.

"Now, if you don't explain to me why the fuck you're wasting my time without all your video game bullshit I will gut you like a trout" she growled.

"Very well" he nodded "Oscorp commissioned the U.S government to fund their development of a nuclear-launching tank, the design of which was taken from the video game Metal Gear-"

"What did I just fucking say?" she snarled, tightening her grip on his throat.

He pushed himself forward, pushing Luna down onto her back and using his adhesive powers to pin her underneath him.

"I'm not making this up Luna!" he yelled angrily "You've made a video game super weapon that Smythe, once he'd taken over the project, had sold to several different governments under specialized contracts without the knowledge of yourself or Celestia, and since this was a black project nobody else in the world would know you had it, meaning that every country he sold it to thought it was exclusively theirs... now Smythe has put a command into the programming of each Metal Gear he's built, wherever they are now to turn against their leaders and hold them hostage until they surrender their country to him"

"Are you seriously trying to tell me that Alistair Smythe has become a Bond villain?" Luna asked, scowling furiously at Spider-Man.

"Yes, that's exactly what I'm telling you Luna... now I know you don't believe me, but I am begging you to take this up with Oscorp and start and investigation into their research, it could mean saving the world" Spider-Man said.

"Well..." Luna said in a sultry tone, narrowing her eyes and chewing her bottom lip "I usually wouldn't trust a guy like you... but you found out about the black project on your own, meaning that you must be very good at fitting into tight spaces"

Spider-Man recoiled slightly as Luna began to rub her leg on the inside of his thigh, giggling playfully as the smaller man on top of her realized the position they were in.

This caught him off guard and caused him to relax before realizing that he'd fallen for the same trick a third time in a month.

As Soon as Luna was able to tell he'd stopped sticking to the floor she rammed her knee into his crotch repeatedly and slammed her forehead into his nose, another visceral cracking sound coming as the cracked bone finally broke.

Luna then cocked back her hand and slammed it into the side of his head, stunning him and knocking him onto the floor, allowing the much more experienced fighter to get back to her feet.

"It never ceases to amaze me that every time I encounter you, you continue to prove how utterly stupid you are" Luna growled, grabbing hold of him by the scruff of his neck and dragging him back over to the window "I don't trust your word, and I never will, but you did find out about the Metal Gear project somehow and despite your large imagination I don't think you'd make something like that up unprovoked, so yes, I will look into this"

"Thank you" Spider-Man groaned.

"But, don't ever walk into my house uninvited again, or at all to be honest" Luna was with a false smile "Because next time I will kill you"

And with that she threw Spider-Man out of the window and allowed him to tumble down to the floor below.

Whether he survived or not was on him, not her.

Getting Together

"What the hell happened to you?" Steve asked, guiding the beaten and bloodied Peter into a seat, lightly squeezing the sides of the teen's nose before Peter hissed in pain "Yeah, that's definitely broken"

"What happened?" Peter asked "I found a threat to national security, told Luna about it and she beat the shit out of me"

"She likes doing that doesn't she?" Carol asked from the doorway "Hi Peter"

"Hi Carol" Peter waved.

"So, did you get any good hits in on her?" Carol asked, pulling up a seat next to the shorter teen and smiling at him.

"Why does that matter?" Peter asked.

"So that's a 'No' then?" Carol said with a raised eyebrow.

"Maybe" Peter shrugged, hissing again as Steve lightly tapped the side of his head, Luna's fist having split the skin and drawn a large amount of blood.

"Christ, say what you want about Luna's political prowess but I'll be damned if that woman doesn't know how to put somebody down" Steve chuckled.

"Can we do anything for him?" Carol asked, a worried expression on her face.

"Besides not laugh at him, nothing's gonna make him heal quicker than his healing factor, from the injuries I've heard about you taking, your nose should be right as rain by tomorrow morning" Steve said, standing up and placing his hands on his hips with a heavy sigh "But that does rule out today's sparring session"

"That's a bad thing?" Peter asked in a confused manner.

"You won't learn how to avoid getting your nose broken as fast" Steve shrugged.

"Eh, I can live with that for a while longer" Peter said with his own shrug.

"So what national security threat did you find?" Steve asked, checking Peter's face for any more injuries he might've sustained with realizing it.

"Well this one was... hold up, you sounded really calm about that, does national security not seem like that big a deal to you?" Peter began before going of on a questioning tangent.

"Eh, most threats to national security are usually some asshat with a plan for world domination" Steve said in a by-the-numbers manner "You usually just rock up, punch them in the face once and then give a speech... so your new threat anything like that?"

"Well... have you guys ever fought thirty feet tall bipedal tanks that can launch forty-five nuclear weapons each?" Peter asked with a grin.

Steve then froze in the middle of examining Peter before looking at Carol who, in turn, had a horrified look on her face.

"Okay, we're taking you to Fury, now" Steve said, helping Peter up and rushing him out of the med-bay.


"And you sure you're right about that?" Fury asked, his tone not disbelieving but instead an uncertain one "That's quite a large accusation to throw at Oscorp Peter"

"I know that Fury, but I swear I'm not making this up, send an email to Stark and I'm sure he'll give you the files I got for him"

"The files you obtained illegally?" Fury asked with his arms crossed.

"You, uh, you're not angry about that are you?" Peter asked with a sheepish expression.

"Angry? No, not at all, I'm impressed if anything" Fury chuckled "You've shown yourself to be resourceful and not afraid to get your hands dirty, it's good to see in a kid your age, not like our little goody-two-shoes Ms Drew"

"Yeah, she doesn't like me very much does she?" Peter asked.

"Not at all, but can we get back on topic?" Fury asked.

"Right, so how am I gonna stop these Metal Gear models from enslaving the world?" Peter asked with an excited grin.

"You aren't, at least, not alone" Fury said, pressing down a button on the table in front of him, several different pictures appearing on the table of all the members of the Avengers, presumably as their communicators activated "Avengers, assemble"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, you're just gonna call the Avengers in to take care of this and not give me a piece of the pie?" Peter asked in a disappointed manner.

"Not at all, this is gonna be your first field op with the team, think of it as your initiation into the team" Fury said with a movement of his hand "If you do well here, we'll think about adding you to the roster"

"You're... you're seriously considering making me a member of the Avengers? As in, saved the world from big scary aliens and are heralded as national treasures?" Peter asked.

"Of course, and before we get on to giving you your company benefits we need to get you a new suit sorted out, thermal gear isn't gonna cut it on the team kid" Fury said "I'll get you set up with a new costume in a few days, so just sit tight while we think up a plan of how we're gonna deal with these Metal Gear things, alright?" Fury asked.

"Company benefits?" Peter asked in confusion.

"Oh yeah, upon being accepted into the Avengers, and as a registered S.H.I.E.L.D employee you'll receive a complimentary T-Shirts, backpack, coffee mug and bumper sticker as well as bronze level access to the S.H.I.E.L.D computer and a bronze level company card that's linked to a constantly refilling bank account in your name, though the bronze level's daily spendage caps at one hundred bucks" Fury explained.

"Are... are you kidding me?" Peter asked.

"Nope, though we might lose the bumper sticker for you, seeing as how you can't drive yet" Fury nodded.

"Wow" Peter said with a blank expression "Just... wow"

Apologies

Twilight's ears twitched as she heard the sound of her sister-in-law angrily throwing things around in the fridge before an angrier growl was heard followed by the door being slammed shut.

"What was that about?" Twilight asked, looking at her older brother.

"I'm not sure, but if I know my wife's grunts and groans like I think I do then I am in some serious shit right now" Shining said, genuine fear in his voice.

And as if by magic, Cadance stormed into the lounge area with a look of fury on her face, standing in front of her husband with a hand on her cocked hips.

"Something wrong dear?" he asked with a sheepish smile.

"Yes, as a matter of fact, there is" she said, curling her fist down by her side.

"Well, don't keep it locked up... just, give it to me straight honey" Shining said with a wave of his hand.

Cadance nodded her head and took a deep breath before unleashing on her husband.

"Shining I swear that if you open one more carton of milk when there's already one open in the fridge... so help me God I'm gonna divorce you" she hissed in rage.

It was at this moment that the brother and sister pulled the same surprised expression, wide eyes and pursed lips, this being one of the few times they looked like one another.

"Are... are you serious?" Shining asked "We're this close to the edge over milk?"

"No, it's not just that" Cadance said, pressing her fingers to her temples and massaging them "It's just the little things you do that really get to me"

"Like what?" Shining asked.

"Well... you know when you finish eating something, and, you take your plate into the kitchen?" Cadance asked "But instead of putting it in the dishwasher you just leave it next to the fucker, why do you do that?"

"Well, uh, it's just that I figured that I'm helping out by leaving it in the general washing zone you know?" Shining asked.

"In the zone?" Cadance asked in bewilderment "In the zone doesn't help me! You might as well leave it on the fucking balcony for all the good the zone does for me!"

Shining recoiled at her sudden increase in volume, another rare time where he was terrified of his wife when she became genuinely angry.

"Let me ask you something, when I bring the groceries in from the car do I just leave them by the fridge? No, I put them in the fridge to get the job done!" she snarled furiously "When I'm cooking dinner do I put the chicken next to the oven and just hope it'll cook itself?"

"No?" Shining asked cautiously.

"Yes honey, I don't, so why don't you put your plate in the dishwasher when you're done with it?" she asked.

"Right... sorry, I'll do that from now on" Shining said slowly.

"Good" Cadance said, her face changing to a cute smile as she beamed at her husband "Now, what d'you guys want to eat for dinner? We've got beef or steak in the fridge?"

There was silence from the two of them before Twilight's phone went off in her pocket.

She checked the caller I.D, making a disgusted noise before answering he call.

"What do you want?" she asked impatiently.

"I'm sorry" Peter's voice said from the other end of the line.

"Yeah, sorry Peter, not buying it" Twilight said in a cold tone "Maybe if you sounded genuine I might believe you"

"I am so sorry" Peter said.

"You're getting there" Twilight said, both Cadance and Shining looking at her "Maybe one more time, maybe in person as well?"

"Ugh... fine, where are you?" Peter asked in an unhappy tone.

"I can come to you, where would you prefer to grovel at my feet?" Twilight asked with a grin.

"You know I could just not apologise and just never talk to you again" Peter said irritably.

"Oh don't be like that, I'm just having a little fun with you" Twilight chuckled "But seriously though, where do you want me to come and talk to you?"

"How about... Times Square? By the staircase?" Peter suggested.

"Eh, it's a walk, but sure" Twilight nodded "I'll meet you there"


Twilight walked over to Peter, the taller teen turning around and flashing an awkward smile before Twilight's eyes fell on the small piece of plaster vast on his nose.

"What's, uh, with the..." she said, pointing at her own nose  to show Peter what she meant.

"A door said push to open, I disagreed and things escalated from there" Peter shrugged "But anyway... I'm sorry"

"As you should be" Twilight said "I stuck my neck out for you there and you kinda... well, totally threw it back in my face"

"Yeah... yeah, I'm really sorry Twilight" Peter said, scratching the back of his head.

"Are you sure you're sorry?" Twilight asked, raising an eyebrow "And how are you going to make it up to me?"

"I, uh, that depends really" Peter mumbled "What exactly do you want me to do?"

"Well... that's a good question if I'm honest" Twilight said, tapping her chin thoughtfully.

Peter stood still for several long moments while the smaller teen switched through several generic thinking poses, his boredom quickly rising as the minutes dragged on.

"You're doing this now just to torture me, aren't you?" he asked "You can hit me a few times if you want, if that'll make the debt go away"

"Tell you what Peter, you go away and do some loser things and I'll just take this whole thing as an I.O.U and call you up when I need something, okay?" she asked with a smile.

"Yeah, sure, whatever Twilight" Peter nodded "So... are we friends again?"

"For now, yes" Twilight nodded, looking at the floor for a long moment before looking back up at Peter "Can I have a lift back home?"

"Yeah, I think I can do that" Peter said "Though just to let you know, my, uh, uniform got destroyed today so I'm having to use something a little different"

"Really?" Twilight asked "Like what?"

"I'll show you in a second" Peter said, looking across the packed city block for an alley they could both duck into to allow him to change "Come on"

Apologies 2: Apologies Harder

"Right, now that Twilight's not mad at me any more-" Peter said, stuffing the black mask into his pocket and taking out his phone, selecting M-J's number and hitting the dial icon.

The phone rang for several long seconds, those ticking by as the dial tone played before it went straight to voicemail, M-J's cutesy-message playing explaining her current predicament.

"Hey caller, this M-J, I can't come to the phone right now cause I'm either sleeping, working out or being a model, leave a message and I'll get back to ya, tootles!" the message said.

"Tootles?" Peter asked with a raised eyebrow "Right, I'm not putting this off or I'll never get to it, I'll try Cadance's company first and go somewhere else if she isn't there"

He stuffed his phone back into his pocket and sighed loudly, knowing he'd need to change back into his temporary suit.

"Why couldn't I get Ms Marvel's ability to just change her clothes into her suit?" Peter asked, dragging his fingers through his hair to thicken it up again "... Maybe I could ask her to fly me there?"

Deciding it was a bad idea to use an Avenger as a taxi service he ducked back into the alley he'd been in a few moments earlier and changed, swinging his backpack onto his shoulders and then swinging off into the city's skyline.

He made good time to Candy Co's HQ and, for the first time in his whole career, he didn't run into a burglary or a mugging that would sidetrack him.

He dropped down behind a dumpster and changed into his usual clothing, wearing the same outfit he always did like some kind of video game character, before heading into the building.

He looked around at the posters on the walls, seeing the famous models that had worked their and apparently their biggest contracts with magazines like Vogue and Playboy, though he did notice a distinct lack of pictures featuring Cadance, something that surprised him as many beautiful designers often liked to post their own modelling portraits and feats of sexiness.

"Can I help you?" a woman asked from the front desk, a woman with short blue hair and thick red glasses.

"Actually, yes, I'm a friend of Cadance's, my name's Peter Parker and I'm here to look for a friend of mine, Mary-Jane Watson, do you know her?" Peter asked.

"Is she one of the Marijuana Models?" she asked in a bored tone.

"The... the what?" Peter asked with a confused expression.

"The Marijuana Models, they're a group Cadance partnered with a few years ago, they're this big company that uses models and P.R meetings to try and convince the government to legalize marijuana, but they don't use their real names to avoid getting found, so they go by monikers like Hemp, Ganja and Green... and in case you didn't know Mary-Jane is also a slang term of marijuana" she explained.

"You know a few years back I wouldn't have believed that was a thing, but ever since by initiation into the glorious world of Subreddits nothing really seems that outlandish to me any more, but no, she's not part of the Marijuana Models, she's a fifteen year old girl, redhead, should be working directly under Cadance?"

"That's Princess Cadance" she corrected.

"Should be working directly under P-Cizzle?" Peter responded.

"Do I need to call security to have you removed?" she asked.

"If that gets me to see Cadance faster then sure, call them" Peter shrugged.

"No sir, they'll remove you from the building" she said in a droll tone.

"Look, I know how this secretary thing works, I had one in The Sims 3, so just use the button you've got on your phone that links directly to Cadance's office to tell her I'm here, and once she lets me up I'll stop bothering you" Peter said with a bored face.

"I'm afraid I don't have time, I'm busy working" she shrugged.

"Woman you are a lobby secretary" Peter growled impatiently "Doing what I'm asking you is your work!"

"Did the Sims teach you that?" she asked irritably.

"No... I think I learned about that one in one of Robert Ludlum's books, think it was the Janson Directive actually" Peter said "It's a good read, I'll lend you my copy if you want?"

The woman looked at him for a long moment before placing her finger down on a button and speaking into a microphone.

"Security, we have a small problem in the lobby, can you please take care of it?" she asked.

"I'm gathering you just called security on me?" Peter asked.

"You pressed a button?"

"Yup"

"And spoke into the microphone?"

"Indeed I did, you're pretty observant kid"

"So... in order to get rid of me, you just used the same amount of time it would've taken to do what I asked you" Peter said, his eye twitching in fury "And the thing I asked you to do was exactly what you just did!"

"Bingo" she winked.

Peter looked at her with pure disgust as a door opened off to the side and several men in black uniforms came out, but one of them was wearing a white shirt and blue tie, that matched his messy blue hair.

They walked over to him, Shining having not noticed Peter at the moment as he was staring at his phone, and one of them pointed at him.

"Is this the problem?" one of them asked in a deep voice.

"No, she is" Peter growled, pointing at the secretary.

Shining then recognized Peter's voice and looked up at him.

"Oh, hey Pete" he said, stuffing his phone away.

"Hey Shining" Peter said, the secretary's eyes widening in horror.

"You mean you... you know this kid?" she asked.

"Yup, he's a good friend of the family actually, goes to school with my little sister" Shining said before correcting himself "Well he would be if he hadn't kicked the shit out of the school's basketball team without taking a punch"

"Eh" Peter shrugged "Have you seen M-J anywhere?"

"Yeah, she was upstairs with Cadance badmouthing you last time I checked" Shining answered.

"Awesome, I'm kinda here to fix that" Peter nodded.

"Well good luck, I'll take you up there if you want" Shining said "The elevator's locked by fingerprints and iris scanners and won't work for anybody who isn't registered into our system"

"Really?" Peter asked.

"No, it's just that the buttons play different chiptunes when you press them and I like pressing them all on the way back down, it's why Cadance hates me coming to work to visit her" Shining said with a boyish grin.

"Right then" Peter said before he threw his arms up in the air as he ran towards the elevator "Chiptunes time!"

"Leedle leedle leedle le!" Shining called, following suit with his arms raised high.


Peter caught a glimpse of M-J's hair disappearing into a room as he exited the elevator and he hurried after her.

"Mary-Jane!" he called out to her, not sure whether she couldn't hear him or if she was just choosing to ignore him.

But deep down...

He knew the answer.

"M-J!" he called out, going through the door and finding himself in a gym filled with models.

He noticed many pairs of gorgeous eyes on him and his nerd instincts kicked in, partly due to being in a gym full of people who exercised and being surrounded by beautiful women.

"Uh, kid, this place is reserved for people who work here" one of the models said from somewhere in the room.

"Right then... am I allowed to talk to my friend for a few minutes?" Peter said, looking at Mary-Jane with a raised eyebrow.

Eyes went to Mary-Jane, who had her hands resting on her a weight rack, her own eyes focussing on the rack before she nodded her head.

"Sure Peter, I've got a few minutes to talk" Mary-Jane said, pushing herself up and walking over to him "What d'you need?"

"Can we talk outside for a few minutes?"

"Alright then" she nodded, following Peter out of the doorway and closing the door behind them.

"Look, I just wanted to say I'm sorry" Peter began "I'm sorry I bailed out on you, sorry I left you on your own and I'm sorry I left you to explain it to J.J who, by some miracle of God, hasn't fired my dumb ass yet"

"Well... I will admit, I'm happy you're one of those guys who knows how he messed up" Mary-Jane said "But you're still not forgiven"

Peter's eyes dropped before Mary-Jane held up a finger, getting Peter's green eyes to meet her own green orbs.

"But, this is a good start" Mary-Jane said "And if you want to keep going then I want something from you"

"Uh... which is?" Peter asked.

"I want you to take me out on a date" she said, folding her arms.

Peter was taken aback by this request as it was something he'd not expected a girl to ask for when mad at somebody else.

"I... I thought you said you didn't date?" Peter asked.

"I don't, and still won't" she answered.

"But you just asked me to take you out on a-"

Another finger, this time pressed against Peter's lips, caused him to fall silent.

"I know that Tiger, but you won't be taking me out on a romantic date, you'll be doing my favourite two things a guy can do for me, the first being doing everything I say with no question to try and make me happy, and the second thing is spending money on me! So everybody wins!"

"No they don't, I lose money and don't get anything in return" Peter said "That means I lose Mary-Jane"

"But you get to rekindle our friendship..." she giggled before stepping a little closer to Peter "And if I really enjoy myself I might give you a little treat in return"

"Really?" Peter asked "Like what?"

"Mhmm, just wait and see Tiger" she said, tapping him on the nose with her index finger "So, you tell me what we're doing tonight, text or call, your choice, and then we'll meet up at wherever you pick at eight o'clock, that sound good to you?"

"Uh... yeah, sure" Peter nodded.

"And don't just pick something tacky, keep in mind that I'm a hard girl to please" Mary-Jane said, smiling for a second before heading back into the gym.

"Well... my first serious date in my entire life and it's gonna be one where I'm waiting hand and foot on my date, doing whatever she says whenever she says it just to avoid an argument" Peter said with a blank expression before his face lit up in rage "Is this gonna be a date or me living out my sixteenth year of marriage!?"

Let the Challenge Begin!

"So... what exactly did you want to talk to me about?" Harry asked, leaning against the doorway of the penthouse he lived in.

"Well... I hate to sound like an asshole here but, well, I pissed off Mary-Jane a few days back, Twilight too, and I apologized to both of them, now I owe Twilight a favour she can ask me for sometime, that's fine with me, but M-J said that I had to take her out on a date to try and get her to be my friend again" Peter explained, his friend stuffing his hands into his pockets as he spoke.

"And the problem is?"

"I'm broke as fuck, Mary-Jane is a classy girl that isn't going to appreciate a hot dog and a bottle of flat coke Harry, so... I know you know how much I had to do this but... can I borrow-"

Peter was cut off by his friend pulling his hand out of his pocket, said hand being filled with a large amount of Franklins, before cocking his arm back and throwing the enormous wad of money into Peter's face, the thin paper creating a loud slapping noise before the bills fell to the floor in a spread pattern.

"Don't mention it" Harry said "Anything else?"

"No, that's it really" Peter said "Thanks bestie"

Harry gave a cheesy smile before closing the door, leaving Peter to scoop up roughly three grand's worth of hundred dollar bills, a startling realization hitting him.

"Harry was wearing jeans" he said furrowing his brow "Who the fuck carries three grand in hundreds in their jeans?"


Peter looked at his watch for the eighty-fifth time that minute, still being surprised that the minute had yet to change, still five to eight at night while he waited for a good time to knock on M-J's door.

"Shit man... when do I knock?" he asked, scratching his head "Do I do it now or will that look to eager? Do I wait till a few minutes past eight to knock... no, that'll just make me look like a jackass... I could knock at exactly eight o'clock but that's too precise a time, she'll think I've been waiting for her... which you are Parker... moron"

He stuffed his hands into his jacket pocket and began to kick the wooden floor with the top of his converses, checking his watch every few seconds nervously.

"Do I need to say something to her?" he asked "Do I need an opening line or smooth one-liner to show her I'm a cool guy? Then again, she already knows how much of a fucking loser I am... evidenced by the fact I'm stood here talking to myself"

"Yeah, it is really depressing to watch actually" he heard a familiar female voice call from the other side of the door, Peter tensing and screwing his eyes shut "You're kind of like a retarded puppy to be honest Tiger, you're not good for much and you're kind of stupid but I'll be damned if watching you make a fool of yourself isn't worth keeping you around"

"How long have you been listening?" Peter asked Mary-Jane.

"Since you started actually, y'know I never really realized how much men over-think this kind of thing" she chuckled.

"It's not overthinking anything, it's just the sheer terror that comes with trying to impress a girl" Peter said, turning to face the door "It's like walking on broken glass, you make one small mis-step and you're bleeding out by yourself"

"Fair enough" she shrugged "D'you wanna wait inside? I'm just finishing off my make-up"

"Actually, do you mind if I go do another shift at work?" Peter asked, pointing his thumb over his shoulder "I think a six hour one should be enough to keep me busy before you're done"

"Ha" Mary-Jane said in a dry tone "Just let yourself in, my Aunt's not home, I'll be a few minutes at most"

"Uh... sure" Peter said, opening the door and walking inside, looking around at the apartment with an impressed expression, his peripheral vision catching a towel-covered Mary-Jane ducking back inside her bedroom.

Peter was at this point horrendously unaware of where to put himself, Mary-Jane hadn't given him any directions of what to do or where to sit.

He wasn't sure if he was supposed to sit down on the couch or if she wanted him to go stand in the kitchen area.

So he just stayed in the entranceway, seeing several piles of shoes and a bookcase next to the doorway lined with books and several photos.

One that caught his eye was a picture of a much younger Mary-Jane standing with a very tall, very muscular man in a black T-Shirt with short, spiked brown hair and a rough beard.

He took a closer look at the picture and guessed it was her father, the two of them not having very many features in common besides their brow, which was a very stylized, though natural curving shape, not too thick but not too thin either.

He looked at several of the other pictures, seeing Mary-Jane fishing with her father, playing football and swimming in the sea in, judging from the white sand and the beautiful blue of the ocean, somewhere exotic.

Or California.

Peter swiftly became bored and took out his phone, opening up his browser and going to his favourite emulator site in an attempt to find out what all the fuss was about Earthbound.

His legs eventually became tired and he went over to the couch, sitting down but keeping his back straight as he unpacked the file and loaded it into the free SNES emulator he'd downloaded a few months ago.

After getting about ten minutes into the game his back became sore and he relaxed into the couch, sinking into the soft material while M-J performed whatever hexing rituals women did to get their hair to look nice.

He wandered around the town for a few minutes, trying to get used to the fact that the A button int he game wasn't an immediate 'talk-to' button before running into the mission objective.

After becoming stuck for several minutes he re-read through several sections of dialogue before deciding to give up and go back to where he'd started to see if there was something he'd missed.

And much to his surprise-slash-anger, that was what he was meant to do.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, wait a second?" he asked angrily "You're actually supposed to go back to bed and not try and sneak past the cops?"

He hit the save state button on the emulator before continuing his playthrough and rant.

"That's exactly the opposite of every game ever made, A Link to the Past started off with you being told to go back to bed and then you ignore it to try and find Zelda... this game just broke one of the quintessential rules of video games which is 'Never follow the orders you're given by adults or people in power'... that's bullshit!" Peter growled angrily, continuing to play the game despite his anger towards it.

Peter's eyes were so intensely focussed on the game that he wasn't willing to look at the new source of heat he felt by his ear, deciding that it was probably just a hot flush brought on by his anger.

Though this theory was quickly proven wrong when Mary-Jane spoke directly into his ear, the sudden volume increase causing the unaware teenager to throw himself away from the young woman.

Mary-Jane began to laugh after Peter's squeal destroyed any idea of masculinity she had about him before he picked himself up and put his phone away, making sure to save state before locking the device.

"Finally" Peter said, looking the redhead up and down, hiding his impressed feeling behind a mask of annoyance.

He wasn't going to lie. She looked beautiful. Her cherry red hair was styled and layered now, her green eyes were complimented by black eye shadow, only making them stand out more.

She wore a black turtle neck sweater and a pair of black skinny jeans topped off with a pair of high-heeled leather boots.

"Wow" Peter thought to himself.

"Are you ready to go?" she asked, hanging her purse on the bend of her elbow and standing with a hand on her hip "I've been waiting ages for you"

"Don't you even dare woman" Peter growled with an angry look "I might have to shave the beard I just grew from how long I was waiting"

"Well whatever, we're both ready now" Mary-Jane said "I'm really looking forward to tonight you know?"

"Really?" Peter asked "Why?"

"I... I don't wanna sound like a loser here but... this is the first date I've been on since I moved here" Mary-Jane said, tugging at her collar to straighten out a crease that wasn't there.

"It's not a date remember?" Peter asked "This is me apologizing for being an asshole"

"Oh... yeah" Mary-Jane sighed, her elated tone dropping slightly before she caught herself "Well, whatever"

"M-J?" Peter asked.

"Peter?" she responded.

"Do you want this to be a date?" Peter asked "Because it can be if you want it to be?"

"And what make you think I want it to be that?" she asked.

"Because you sounded upset that it wasn't that" Peter reinforced.

"That it wasn't what?"

"That it wasn't a date"

"Because it isn't"

"But do you want it to be?"

"Want it to be what?"

"It to be a date"

"Why would I want that?"

"I don't know, why would you?"

"I thought the question was do I?"

"And do you?"

"Do what?"

"Then who's on first?"

"What?"

"Nothing, let's just go" Peter sighed, placing a hand on Mary-Jane's back and guiding her out of the apartment.

Bump on the Road

Mary-Jane rested her back against the leather seats of the booth, a contented sigh escaping her mouth as she laid her fork down, having devoured her meal in a matter of minutes.

Peter had watched her eat like a wolf, a sophisticated wolf that knew the difference between a steak knife and a butter knife, as he slowly ate his own spaghetti.

"You know something?" Peter asked suddenly.

"A few things yes, but I get the feeling you're going to tell me something new" Mary-Jane nodded, resting her hands on her stomach and closing her eyes.

"I probably should've punched the guy working at the door for the way he talked to us" Peter said, looking back at the man behind the desk with an angry expression.

"Hey, don't let it get to you Tiger, if I was in his place I'd be a little skeptical if two fifteen year olds walked into one of the most expensive restaurants in New York and claimed to have a reservation" Mary-Jane said "You're gonna have to get used to dealing with assholes in life, it's a known fact"

"Trust me, I'm good at dealing with assholes" Peter said, moving his fork to his mouth and filling it with delicious spaghetti, putting a hand over his mouth to make sure he didn't spit out pasta chunks as he spoke "This is a really nice place, food's great"

"You're right, that was the best steak I've ever had in my life" Mary-Jane said "I'll have to come here some other time"

"Yeah, good luck with that, this place is stupid expensive" Peter said.

"Don't worry, I'm working on a model's salary now Peter, I can afford a good few things that most kids our age can only gawk at" Mary-Jane shrugged.

"Yeah, how's the modelling thing going for you anyway?" Peter asked.

"It's going great actually, the girls there are really nice and welcoming, Cadance is a really nice woman as well, I'd heard stories growing up about how she was a bit of a wild child at our age but she matured when she met Shining" Mary-Jane described "But the thing that really caught me by surprise was how much she offered me to work for her"

"Really?" Peter asked, sipping from his glass of Pepsi "How much did she offer you?"

"Well, seeing as how I'm under eighteen she said she couldn't give me the same contract as she did for the other girls so I'd lose a few grand from that, but she said that if I did a few good shoots, brought revenue into the company and attracted a few investors before I was eighteen she'd be more than happy to give me an additional zero onto my salary" she explained "But I'm being paid the basic salary for a girl my age at her company, which is thirty-eight grand a year"

Peter had to tighten his lips to prevent himself from spitting Pepsi all over the table, a look of pure shock in his eyes as the redhead raised an eyebrow at him.

"You alright there Tiger?" she asked.

"Y-Yeah, just... that's a shit ton of money Mary-Jane, some adults don't even make that amount of money" Peter said after swallowing his mouthful of soda "I don't even think my Aunt makes that much a year"

"I'm quite happy with it actually, it means I don't really have to worry about bills and stuff as I get older, I can focus mostly on school and college with work on the side" Mary-Jane nodded, sipping from her straw, something Peter only just noticed.

"Why did you ask for that?" he asked.

"Ask for what?" Mary-Jane responded.

"A straw, d'you not like drinking out of the glass normally?"

"No, it's so I don't smudge my lipstick on my bottom lip and don't wash it off the top one" Mary-Jane said.

"Huh, I never thought of that" Peter nodded "Good thinking"

"Trust me Tiger, us girls have about three hundred different things we need to take notice of when going out on a date to make sure we always look good" Mary-Jane said.

"Such as?"

"Well one thing is that we have to decide whether or not we'll take a purse or a bag with us, and that involves factoring in the outfit we've chosen to see if it matches, what place we're being taken to to see if it's appropriate for that environment, then we have to arrange and ration what we put in the purse because if it's too heavy it could upset us walking in heels and with it being too heavy it could cause to to exert ourselves and the sweat'll ruin our make-up" she explained.

Peter sat there for several log minutes, his mind being blown at the space-launch-esque list of things women needed to do before dates, including packing emergency make-up supplies in case of unforeseen weather changes, a different pair of shoes depending on whether or not they were being picked up in a car or walking to their destination.

His mind was completely overwhelmed by the descriptions of the pre-planning and then it nearly exploded as she began to detail how to make the actual date to go well, that stuff included keeping constant check on your make-up in ways that didn't make you look vain, the best excuse being a watch that had a highly reflective face to allow you to see if you still looked good.

A pack of mints tucked away in a pocket of your purse in case the date got a little more intimate and also a bottle of Mase if it got intimate when you didn't want it to.

Mary-Jane finished her Master's Thesis on feminine dating rituals by describing the process of easing the boyfriend into seeing her with less and less make-up on the more and more he spent time with her so he wouldn't be horrified by the sight of her suddenly appearing without make-up on.

"But surely you don't have to worry about that right?" Peter asked "I've seen you without make-up on right?"

"Have you seen me in the shower?" Mary-Jane asked.

"Regrettably, no" Peter answered.

"Then you've never seen me without-" Mary-Jane said with her finger raised in the air to make a point before she dropped her hand onto the table and gave Peter a very unimpressed look "You know something Parker, I thought you were different from the other guys who've asked me out"

"Well I can say with one-hundred percent certainty that I am very different from most other guys" Peter said with a nod "In ways I don't even wanna try to explain"

"Really?" Mary-Jane said, sitting up straight and placing her hands on the table "Because right there you just proved to me you're only interested in sex"

"What?" Peter asked in a horrified tone "No I'm not... that was a joke M-J"

"No Peter, I don't think it was" she growled, crossing her arms and looking away from him.

"GG Parker, really good going there asswipe" Peter thought to himself, trying his best to think of a way to turn this situation around again.

A second went by before he was hit in the face with his counter-argument, one he was sure would make her believe him.

"I can prove to you in less than two sentences I'm not just after sex" Peter said confidently.

"Go ahead" she said dryly.

"I abandoned you, remember?" Peter asked.

"What?"

"At the interview for work, I put something else above you and left you on your own, would someone who makes their every move about trying to get into a hot redhead's panties fuck up as bad as I did then?" Peter asked "And I don't think the excuse 'You did it on purpose' applies here because that would be a stupid thing to do on purpose"

"Fair point, but then I could just say that you heard me offer you a date and then decided you wanted to try and fuck me, what do you say to that?" Mary-Jane asked.

"This: If I was making an attempt to fuck you disguised as patching up our relationship then why would I bring up the reason you're mad at me?" Peter asked "Don't lie, you're still bitter about that and me reminding you of it got you angry at me again didn't it?"

Mary-Jane was silent for a second, dragging her well-manicured nail around the rim of her glass before her eyes fell to the table, her response a mumble.

"Alright, fine" she said.

"There we go, now can we forget about my stupid joke and go back to having a nice time?" Peter asked.

"If you're willing to pay for another round then sure, I'm game" Mary-Jane said, finishing her drink and placing it down on the table with a relieved sigh.

"Fair enough" Peter said, looking around for a waiter.

End of the Night

Peter and Mary-Jane had left the restaurant several minutes earlier, both of them having enjoyed their food and were more than ready to head to their homes and sleep.

Mary-Jane yawned loudly, covering her mouth with her hand before turning to look at Peter.

"Ugh, I don't think I'm gonna make it to bed, I might just find a nice trash bag and sleep on that" Mary-Jane said.

"I think I might join you" Peter nodded, rubbing his eyes "How long were we in there for?"

"About... two, two and a half hours I think" Mary-Jane said, checking her watch "Yeah, just a little over two and a half, it's twenty to ten now"

"Wow, it's a good job I told Aunt May that..." Peter said, his words dying in his throat as he realized how wrong that statement was "Oh... fuck. My. Life"

"You forgot to tell her you were taking me out tonight didn't you?" Mary-Jane asked with a smirk.

"Maybe" Peter said, putting a hand to his face and groaning loudly "How d'you feel about black dresses M-J?"

"I love them, why?" she asked.

"Would you mind wearing a nice one for my funeral?" he squeaked.

"I'd love to Tiger" she chuckled, patting him on the back "Here, gimme your phone and I'll call her for you and explain everything"

"Sure" Peter nodded, unlocking his phone and handing it to M-J.

The redhead called May's number and placed the phone to her ear, staying silent for several moments before she spoke in a pleasant tone.

"Hi Mrs Parker, this is Mary-Jane Watson, I just wanted to apologize for Peter not calling you to tell me he was taking me out on a date tonight" she said.

Peter watched M-J's expression to see how much trouble he was in while the redhead simply nodded every few seconds.

"Okay then, fifty lashings and salt in the wound right?" Mary-Jane said, casting a sideways smile at Peter "Oh, and waterboarding? Of course I'll tell him to prepare himself... alright then Mrs Parker, talk to you later, bye bye"

Mary-Jane handed the phone back to Peter who locked it and stuffed it back into his pocket.

"Don't worry, she's not gonna kill you, just torture you to an inch of your life" she said.

"That sounds about right" Peter nodded "Thanks M-J"

"No problem" she smiled, turning her head forwards and looking down the street, a thought obviously distracting her.

"What's on your mind?" Peter asked her.

"Hm?" she asked, turning to look at him before shaking her head "Oh don't worry, just thinking about work tomorrow"

"What about it?" Peter asked.

"Nothing really, it's not that important" Mary-Jane shrugged.

"Well if it wasn't that important you wouldn't be thinking about it would you?"

"I guess not"

"So spill, what's eating you about work?"

"It's... it's just that... okay, I wasn't really thinking of work" Mary-Jane sighed.

"Then why did you say you were?"

"To try and bore you out of talking about it"

"Nah, hang around me and you'll find out I like to talk... a lot, like, never shuts up a lot" Peter shrugged.

"I've noticed" Mary-Jane nodded.

"Yeah, just wait until there's a moment you want me to take seriously and I don't stop joking, that annoys the fuck out of people" Peter grinned before growing serious "Especially Natasha"

"Who?" Mary-Jane asked.

"Just a girl I know" Peter said with a wave of his hand "Not really important right now"

"Right... anyway, can we hurry it up a little bit, it's starting to get really cold out here?" Mary-Jane asked.

"Sure, I'll try not to walk too far ahead of you"

The two of them walked faster, making it past crossing sections, through alleys and over several fences to get to Mary-Jane's apartment faster.

When they finally got there it was getting close to eleven o'clock, both of them being tired and exhausted from their monumental trek, Peter watching Mary-Jane unlock her front door before turning around and looking at her friend.

"Thanks Peter, I really enjoyed tonight" she said happily "You actually know how to treat a girl, that surprised me quite a bit"

"Well... I'm happy you're happy, I had fun while you had fun and I think we both enjoyed spending Harry's money together" Peter grinned.

"You borrowed money from Harry?" she asked.

"Oh yeah, if I'd paid for it myself we would've gotten a hot dog to share and I'd have brought a bottle of coke for you to drink instead of a fancy restaurant meal" Peter chuckled "The Parker's aren't rolling in the money right now"

"Is... is it that bad?" Mary-Jane asked with a worried expression.

"It's not... who the fuck am I kidding?" he said with a heavy sigh "It's bad M-J... my Aunt and I were struggling after my Uncle died, now that she's broken her arm she can't work and the sick pay she's getting isn't enough to cover the bills so that's why I'm trying to scrounge up as many photos of Spider-Man I can for the Bugle while in my free time I'm hanging around with my rich friends who only have to worry about not missing the bus to school in the morning"

Mary-Jane stood completely still while Peter's confident persona dropped off him like a rock off a ledge, revealing the anxious, fidgety and worrying Peter Parker he thought he'd left behind before puberty started.

"Fuck, Peter, why didn't you talk to any body about this?" Mary-Jane asked.

"And ask them to do what?" Peter asked with a raised eyebrow "Ask them to pay for my family for me, say that we can't live on our own so we run to our closest rich friend and start to leech of them, no way M-J, I have to do this by myself"

"I... I don't know what to say Peter" she said, scratching the back of her head with a forlorn expression "I'm sorry"

"Don't feel bad M-J, it's not like is your fault" Peter said, trying to comfort them both with a smile that wasn't genuine "Look on the bright side, at least doing this now is teaching me to be resourceful and look after myself on a low budget, right?"

"You shouldn't have to worry about money at our age Peter" she said in a quiet tone.

"Yeah, well... we're not all supermodels are we?" Peter asked before regretting his choice of words upon seeing Mary-Jane's face fall "Shit, sorry, I didn't mean that to sound mean, I just meant that you're lucky to not have to worry about money... I just... fuck..."

There was silence between the two of them for a long moment before Peter stood up straight and smiled at her.

"Alright then... bye M-J, see you round" he said, giving her a two finger salute before turning and walking away, leaving Mary-Jane standing on the doorstep with a horrified look on her face.

"Tiger... I'm sorry" she said, putting a hand to her mouth "And... and I was gonna make him spend his money on me? Jesus Christ..."

New Duds

Peter examined his nose in the mirror of one of the bathrooms in the Triskellion, prodding it with his fingers to see if it still hurt.

It of course had healed overnight, as had the cut on the side of his head, and he had been emailed by Fury to come to the Triskellion to try out the new suit that'd been developed for him.

He'd questioned the word 'developed' instead of stitched up but he'd decided to go along with it.

He left the bathroom and headed down to the meeting room where Fury was waiting.

"Parker, just in time" Fury said with a smile as Peter walked in "We've just finished folding it and putting it in this box"

"So I missed the fun bit?" Peter asked.

"Afraid so kiddo" Fury shrugged, turning around the S.H.I.E.L.D brand box and sliding it across the table to Peter.

Peter caught the box and unclasped it, taking an excited breath before lifting the lid up.

The first thing he noticed about the new suit was the colour of it. While his original suit was a modified ski suit with faded colours and fraying stitches this new one was a much sleeker and darker shade, instead of the faded crimson it used to be the red was now a beautiful wine red colour, complimenting the new navy blue colours replacing the old cerulean it had once been.

The second thing he noticed was the web patterns, instead of being printed onto the suit they were now standing as a raised pattern off the outfit, made out of a strange plastic. Then he noticed the eyes, no longer the cheap and tacky lenses they once were these were professionally tempered plates that were fastened securely onto the mask.

He picked up his new favourite thing in the world and felt the material, it being a smooth yet durable and still extremely flexible one, looking at the mask with a wide grin seeing that it had been stylized to fit the shape of his head and now had a magnetic collar line that would attach to the collar of the suit itself so it no longer had to hang in the tacky fashion it once did.

"Don't just stand there and look at it, we made it for you to wear it kid" Fury said "I'll still be here when you get back"

Peter nodded, heading back to the bathroom and trying on the suit, the much tighter material feeling stiffer but thinner than ever before with less hang on areas the old one didn't cling to as tightly. It also fit him so well that it never seemed to crease while he stood around.

He walked back into the room with his mask in hand and a wide grin on his face, rolling his shoulders and cracking his neck.

"Oh yeah... this is awesome" he smirked.

"Good, now do you want me to tell you what modifications we made to it?" Fury asked "Or do you wanna figure it out by yourself?"

"Would I want to drive a car down the street at top speed without knowing how to stop it?" Peter asked with a cocked eyebrow.

"Fair point" Fury chuckled "We'll start with the material, the reason the suit feels tighter than before, or at least it should, is because its been laced with a new form of ultra thin material that has the same non-conductive property of rubber, meaning that if you ever go up against Electro again wearing that he won't be able to zap you"

"That's good to know" Peter nodded "Electrocution is not a fun pass time"

"Agreed, secondly, the material is insulated so there'll be no need to splash out on this thermals when the winter comes as the suit'll keep most of your body heat inside when it's cold" Fury said.

"But won't that just cause me to sweat more during the summer if it's already thermal layered?"

"No, because the material of the suit is temperature sensitive, it's designed for the small holes on the suit to shrink when it's exposed to colder temperatures while also expanding when exposed to hot ones to allow your skin to breathe" Fury explained.

"Shit, that's awesome too" Peter smiled "What else has it got?"

"As you can tell the suit isn't just a singular piece like it was last time, but on all the areas where it breaks away we've installed small magnets that'll help hold it together and keep everything down flat when you're doing your thing, that means if you wanna take your shirt off you can, or if you wanna remove your gloves and your boots but keep the rest of the suit on you can do exactly that" Fury continued.

"And removable pants means easy access" Peter nodded "I'm loving this"

"I would usually say something about that but from what I've heard from other heroes that wear similar suits to yours, that is actually a good thing to have" Fury said "It's so you don't have to strip off completely when you need to take a leak on the job"

"So this thing just seems awesome all around, is there anything else you've added to it?" Peter asked.

"Besides making the material more durable and the thermal layering acting as padding to reduce blunt force trauma, then no, that's all we did with it" Fury said "Do you like the colours?"

"I think they're awesome, I always loved darker shades of red and blue anyway, and it's a good thing the eyes aren't a stupidly white colour either, just a nice and dull white instead, or huge, cause that'd look dumb" Peter nodded "I'm really impressed Fury, you guys did a great job with this thing"

"Yeah, you can pay us back later, but first Steve says he wants to check how you move around in that thing before you go back to fighting crime in it, and also he wants you to catch up on your missed training session on behalf of you getting your ass beat" Fury chuckled.

"That sounds fair" Peter shrugged, standing up and shaking Fury's hand with a smile "Thanks again Fury"

"No problem kid" Fury nodded "Now get going, I wanna see Steve beat you up again, that shit's fun to watch"

"I love you too"

Training Round 3: Training With a Vengeance

"Alright then Parker" Steve said as he tied the boxing tape around Peter's hands "D'you know what kind of boxer you are?"

"A bad one?" Peter asked, this gaining a laugh from Carol who was sitting next to Natasha, the two of them sitting with a large bucket of popcorn each and a huge selection of drinks for them to share.

"No, you fight right handed Pete, that makes you an Orthodox fighter" Steve said with a grin "That's the most common type of fighting style in boxing as most people are dominantly left handed, d'you know what left-handed fighters are called?"

"Southpaws right?" Peter asked.

"That's right" Steve said, standing up and slapping Peter on the back of his hands, gesturing for Peter to get up and move into the ring with him "It's a very uncommon fighting style and most orthodox fighters hate fighting southpaws because of a so called 'Southpaw jinx'" Steve explained, pulling on his boxing gloves before throwing another pair to Peter "Now the name I always used to describe myself was a converted southpaw, I used to fight left handed but when Luna started training me during the war she refused to train me unless I learned to fight right handed"

"Why?" Peter asked as he pulled on his gloves.

"Because with the way right handed fighters stand their feet are positioned to withstand powerful punches from another right handed fighter, but with a blow coming from the left hand they aren't positioned to take a powerful blow from the direction and it's more likely to knock them over" Steve said, beginning to dance around  "It also throws off the orthodox fighter's timing in the their punches as the southpaw can usually interrupt their larger swings with their right hand with blows to the face because they aren't guarding that side of their body"

"And that's why Luna didn't want you fighting southpaw?" Peter asked.

"Yeah, her biggest and probably only weakness in a fight is that she cannot adapt to a southpaw's fighting style, she outright refuses to fight them" Steve said, rolling his shoulders.

"Right, that'll come in handy the next time I go up against the Ice Queen" Peter growled, cracking his neck and moving towards Steve.

"Good, you're eager to get knocked out aren't you Peter?" Steve said, throwing a stiff right jab aimed for Peter's head.

Instead of dodging the blow as he would usually, Peter raised up his arm and deflected the blow, this leaving Steve's right side open for a left hook.

The hit connected but did practically nothing, Peter's left hook being pathetically weak compared to his right.

"Nice try Peter" Steve chuckled, dodging Peter's follow up right hook and slamming his fist into his stomach, causing the smaller fighter to lean over slightly which opened up him to a vicious left handed uppercut from Steve, knocking Peter flat onto his back.

Instead of laying down like he usually did, Peter used the momentum to roll over his right shoulder and get back to his feet, diving forward with his right arm cocked back for another powerful hook only to have Steve dodge to the side, forcing Peter to pivot straight into another hook, a right one this time, that sent the teen spinning to the floor.

"Come on Peter" Steve called "Stay on your feet!"

Peter caught himself on his hands as he fell, spinning back up onto his feet, ducking forward before leaping up with a spinning uppercut, this catching Steve off-guard and causing the blow to connect with his jaw.

"Shoryuken!" Peter yelled.

Steve stumbled back, his eyes locking onto Peter as he recovered his foot, ducking under Peter's next barbaric left hook and angling his body so that Peter's right jab would glide off his ribs with left damage, ducking down Peter's arm before slamming his fist into his stomach, Peter gasping loudly, as Steve continued to unleash vicious body blows that back Peter into the corner.

"Well, Pete's fucked" Natasha said, crunching a mouthful of popcorn.

"Is yours buttered or salted?" Carol asked through a mouthful of her own popcorn.

"Buttered, can't stand salt" Natasha responded.

"Weirdo" Carol said before turning back to the fight "Come on Peter!"

Peter was once again being beaten to a pulp in the corner, trying desperately to get his hands low enough to protect his middle from the devastating scores of punches Steve was unleashing.

Deciding that that wasn't going to work he did something he knew wasn't going to work, he put all of his strength into his core and tried to push Steve back, the bigger man losing ground for a brief moment before connecting another hook to Peter's jaw, this knocking him back.

"Ugh" Peter groaned, attempting the strategy again only to have the second punch, a much more powerful one knock him straight to the floor.

Using the space he had down on the floor he threw himself out of the corner and into a wider area, getting back to his feet and ducking under a swing from Steve only to be caught out by a feinted right jab, a left hook catching him in the side and knocking down again, his arms on the ropes desperately trying to hold him up.

"You've gotta keep your footwork steady Peter" Steve said "You're trying to push me with your arms instead of your legs, your legs can muster more force than any other part of your body and can give you some serious power when you need it"

"Right" Peter said, getting back to his feet and wiping his gloves on his suit, no better way to break the new duds in than this he thought.

Steve came in for another powerful right hook and instead of attempting to dodge or counter, Peter merely activated his adhesive powers, brought his hands up to his head and tensed his core muscles as the strike hit him like a truck, his back cracking as it sustained the blow, his arms now in agony.

"Nice going Peter" Natasha called "He's getting better at this"

"I know, d'you think he'll be able to beat Steve soon?" Carol asked her friend.

"Now, now Ms Danvers, let's not get ahead of ourselves here" Natasha said with a wave of her finger "Early days yet"

Peter sustained another blow from Steve, this one stronger than before, and he began to feel his arms failing him, them screaming for him to move or dodge of do anything besides take another hit.

As Peter saw Steve cocking his fist back for another brutal swing, this one sure to smash right through his guard, he limbered up his legs and prepared a new move.

Steve threw the punch with all his might, but Peter, still using his adhesive power, bent over, his knees bending at a ninety degree angle as the punch sailed straight over his head.

Peter then swung his body around and, as he straightened his knees, threw the best left hook he could into Steve's jaw, hoping to use his upset balance to knock him down to the ground.

The punch connected, Steve stumbled, but he caught himself before he went down.

"Huh... I didn't expect that" Steve said "Good move Peter"

"Thank you" Peter nodded, smiling proudly.

Steve then smashed his hands together and gained a more determined look on his face before speaking again.

"Looks like I'm gonna have to step it up a notch" he chuckled.

"Oh fuck me" Peter said in a terrified tone as Steve rushed forward and began to wipe the floor with him, as he had done in their first proper sparring match.

Statistics

Steve sat down next to Peter, both of them having sustained injuries during their sparring match but, once again, Peter had received the worst of them.

Steve sported a black eyes and bruised ribs while Peter had his cheek split, his forehead cut, both eyes blackened and his jaw dislocated at one point.

The older man handed the battered teen a bottle of water, Peter taking it with a thank you before downing half the liquid in a single go.

"Thirsty?" Steve asked with a smirk.

"You know it... I know I'm meant to have superhuman endurance but... fuck, I'm exhausted just from that" Peter nodded.

"Yeah, it's because you're throwing every punch as if you're trying to knock out your opponent in one go, that works against normal crooks but with guys like me, Thor and, hopefully never, the Hulk you're gonna exhaust yourself before you even get them tired" Steve explained, resting his elbows on his knees as he ran his hand through his hair.

"You've gotta take your time with fights Peter, start out with weaker jabs and softer kicks, outside the ring in the case of the latter, to see how your opponent moves and angles themselves, look for weak spots and open areas to strike with a more powerful shot" Steve continued "Give me a few examples of fights you've been in that've lasted longer than a minute"

"Uhhh" Peter said, scratching the back of his head "I think I went a few minutes against Black Cat once or twice... before she ran away"

"Right, so far in your career, and don't take this as a criticism mind you, you've only had skirmishes, never an actual brawl, is that right?" Steve asked.

"Yeah, that's about right" Peter said "And most of the fights I've had... I've kinda lost"

"Really?" Steve asked "Against who?"

"Like I said, Black Cat, then there was the fight I had with Elektra where she annihilated me..." Peter said "Then there was the fight with Luna yesterday... and the draw we had before that... so far my superhero career has just been me getting beaten up by women"

Steve laughed into the bottle he was drinking from, patting Peter on the back with a grin.

"Don't let it get you down kid, everybody's gotta start somewhere" Steve said in a comforting manner "Even in the big leagues, you've got that guy that doesn't do too well at first"

"Yeah, well I don't wanna be the Glass Joe of the Avengers, so this rookie-thing better come to a end, soon" Peter sighed, gingerly touching his sore face again, hissing in pain.

"Whoever that is, I'm sure you'll be better than him" Steve said, clapping Peter on the back and standing up straight "Alright then kid, back to training"

"Already?" Peter asked in fear "We've only had, like, ten minutes to sit down"

"I know that, but don't worry, we're not gonna do any sparring, I just wanna help you work on your form" Steve said.

"Actually Cap, you're gonna have to put that on hold, Fury wants to see Peter downstairs in the gym" Clint called from the doorway.

"How come?" Steve asked, standing up and looking at his friend.

"He says that he wants to get an accurate record of Peter's abilities for his file as well as a reference sheet to the rest of the team" Clint said before waving and leaving the room.

"Well then, guess you get out of training for the rest of the day" Steve shrugged "Lucky bastard"


Peter's eyes scanned the enormous room, seeing several different sets of exercise equipment, ranging from reasonable weights to enormous machines loaded with even larger weights.

"Alright then Parker" Fury said "We're gonna take you over to our little testing area and see what you're made of"

"So... what exactly are you gonna make me do?" Peter asked.

"Just basic stuff, the others have all gone through it to have their abilities on record so we can pick and choose different members of the team to respond to different emergencies depending on what skills-slash-powers are needed" Fury explained "We do the same thing for every member of S.H.I.E.L.D at five years intervals to see what their physical pinnacle is, same reason as to why"

"Right then" Peter said "What are we gonna work on first?" Peter asked.

"First thing-" Fury said, pointing at a large stack of weights roughly ten-by-ten suspended by an enormous fork-lift-esque machine "Is your maximum weight capacity"

"How does it work?" Peter asked, having a general idea but not liking what it was.

"Well, basically, we put you under it and lower it onto your back before applying a weight to it, and as you prove that you can lift that one, we'll add another one on" Fury said "And we stop when you can't physically lift them any more"

"And what if it fucks up and crushes me?" Peter asked in a worried tone.

"Don't worry Petey" Carol said, patting Peter on the back.

Peter turned to look at her, the gorgeous blonde woman now sporting a tight shirt and a pair of black yoga pants.

"Noice" Peter thought to himself, forcing himself to keep eye contact instead of staring at her breasts.

"I'll make sure you don't get crushed" she said with a smile.

"That sounds good, how much can you lift?" Peter asked.

"As of yet, we don't have a limit for her" Fury answered "One of Ms Marvel's key powers is energy absorption, energy which she can lend to her physical strength to lift whatever she wants, and as long as she's got a constant stream of energy she can lift practically anything"

"That's both awesome and terrifying" Peter said "Are you not afraid that you'll trip, fall over and punch the Earth out of orbit?"

"No, not again" she smiled, patting Peter on the head before walking over to the machine.

"Oh, alright the-what the hell do you mean again?!" he demanded, only to have Fury chuckle at him.

"Go on, we'll start up the machine and see what you're made of" he said.

Peter nodded and made his way over to the machine, reaching his hand up and touching the underside of the flat surface, the black object being smooth and cold.

"Alright then Peter, if you can just stand there for a minute while we lower this thing onto your back" Fury called over to him, activating the machine with the flick of a switch.

The machine's powerful gears activated and lowered down onto Peter's back with an extremely loud grinding sound, the cold metal being nothing more than feather for Peter to hold up at the moment.

"Alright, when you give us the word we'll start" Fury said "Ms Marvel, you're on standby right now"

"Okay Fury" she nodded.

"Right, let me have it" Peter said, feeling one of the weights being applied to the platform, requiring minimal effort for him to lift.

"Right Peter, that's half a ton there, that's roundabout one thousand pounds" Fury said "How're you holding up?"

"No problem Fury" he said "Gimme more"

They did, adding on another half-ton weight, Peter feeling the new amount but it caused no strain to him yet.

"Now?"

"Still good"

"Good to hear it, I'm gonna put on two of them this time alright, that'll be two tons" Fury said, flipping another switch to add more weight on.

Peter had to straighten his back a little more to keep himself up, not causing any difficulties but he wanted to be prepared.

"And?"

"Managing"

"Good, ready for another ton?"

"Try for two" Peter called.

"You sure?"

"Positive" Peter said, gritting his teeth.

The weight was applied to his body and he had to lock his legs to keep himself up straight, his shoulders beginning to feel the strain of supporting the weight.

"Ms Marvel, keep an eye on him" Fury reminded.

"I am" Carol said, looking at Peter with a gentle smile before whispering to him "Don't get yourself hurt, there's no shame in stopping"

"I'm good, another two Fury" Peter said.

"If you're sure" he said, adding another two tons to bring it up to six and this caused Peter to immediately feel the strain.

Gritting his teeth he locked every joint he had as he had to forcibly push himself to prevent being crushed, a worried look appearing on Ms Marvel's face as she placed a hand to her mouth.

"Is that it?" Fury asked.

"No..." Peter groaned, sweat beginning to appear on his face "Go for... just one this time"

Fury nodded and added the seventh ton, this pushing Peter to his very limit. He felt his knees ready to give way at any second and when his final push to give himself room to manoeuvre ended up with his knee dropping to the floor.

Peter hissed in pain, Fury stopping the machine before Carol jammed her hand underneath it and lifted it above her head in an effortless manner.

Peter couldn't get back to his feet, every muscle in his body aching too much for him to move, Carol waiting for the machine to raise again before releasing it and walking over to Peter.

She sat down next to him and put an arm around his shoulder, allowing him to lean against her side and relax, heavy breaths exiting his mouth as Carol appeared worried.

"Anything broken?" she asked "Ruptured, split or sprained?"

"No..." Peter panted "I'm good, I'm good... fuck... that was something else"

"You've never done that before?" she asked, his head leaning against her chest.

"Never... I don't think I've ever given my all at anything physical before in my life" Peter said, wiping the sweat from his forehead with the back of his glove "And I don't think I ever want to again"

"Hopefully you won't have to" Carol chuckled "Still, you did good... not as good as me, but decent for a kid"

The angry look Peter shot her made her chuckle, the two of them sitting quietly while Fury spoke to several other S.H.I.E.L.D members who had been watching the event.

Basic Results

Peter lay, exhausted and gasping for air, with his head resting on Carol's thigh, the blonde woman reading a book as the teen seemed to be going into cardiac arrest.

"So..." Carol said, not looking away from her book "How good do you feel right now?"

"End it all" Peter groaned "My legs can carry this body no longer and my shoulders can carry this burden no more, come sleep, come death, allow me entry through your door"

"That was very articulate Peter, you've got quite the way with words" she said.

"Raisins"

"Indeed" she said, petting him on the head before turning the page in her book.

"Good news Peter" Fury said, walking over to him with several sheets of paper.

"Is it death?" Peter asked, not looking up "Please say it's death"

"Not just yet Peter, now come on, sit up and talk to Fury" Carol said.

"Hoist me" Peter said, holding his wrists up.

Carol rolled her eyes before grabbing hold of Peter's wrist and lifting him up, Peter's tired eyes lazily looking at Fury as the older man rose an eyebrow.

"Is he okay?" Fury asked.

"I think so" Carol said, shaking Peter's arms "He can still dance"

"No... please no, no more movement for the next century" he begged, Carol continuing to shake him and make him perform different steps of the Macarena.

"Anyway..." Fury said, slightly disturbed at the look of childish joy on Carol's face "We've got your results back from the tests we performed and you'll be very pleased to hear them"

"All I can hear is blood" Peter whimpered.

"Right, I'll be sure to talk louder then" Fury said "On the speed test you clocked in a maximum of eighty miles per hour, that's fast enough to keep up with a moving car Peter"

"I'll be sure to keep up with cars when I'm not too busy trying to keep being conscious" Peter said "But yay for me"

"Other results came in for superhuman dexterity, you seem to be able to suffer damage that would kill a normal human instantly, I know that one was your favourite to test out" Fury chuckled.

"Is the grill of the truck still imprinted on my face?" Peter asked, Carol turning his head around and looking at the red mark on his forehead.

"Lil bit, going away quickly through" she answered before grabbing hold of his arms again and flailing them around.

"Awesome" Peter said.

"The blood samples we took and put into the simulation showed us that your healing factor would be able to heal you from pretty much any injury that didn't involve losing a piece of you in roughly twenty four hours and the toxin test done on you during different stages of your bleep test showed that your body doesn't produce nearly as much as a normal human" Fury said, flicking over the pages and reading from the results.

" Andwith the calculations done by the scientists on the rate you were expending yourself during the test, they calculated you'd be able to push yourself for a maximum of twenty seven hours before becoming too tired to continue any physical movements" Fury said "Now, you're aware that the only tests we could put you in to truly test the limits of your Spider-Sense were much too dangerous for you, and we couldn't run any concrete simulations as we don't have nearly enough evidence to run them"

"So the Spider-Sense is a complete mystery to all of us?" Peter asked "Because I don't really know how to work it that well myself... there was this one time, in the fight with Luna, where it started picking up muscle movements that would give away her moves before she made them but... I don't think I can activate that at will"

"Don't worry about that kid, we've got someone we can put you in contact with who can teach you how to use that sense, old friend of ours you'll be happy to see no doubt" Fury said "But with accurate estimates for strength, dexterity, stamina, speed and healing, we've got the basics we need to know about you recorded in our system, both to help us and you when you need it"

"Alright then" Peter nodded, Carol lying his head back down on her thigh "Can I get a little rest"

"You should feel better in about five minutes Peter if you-"

"Shhh" Peter said, Carol holding up his hand while Peter's performed the quiet gesture "Sleepy-byes now, talk to you later"

With Fury casting a bemused look at Carol, the blonde woman merely shrugging before picking up her book again, Peter closed his eyes and fell asleep, his dreams being a messed recollection of the tests he'd endured and the license plate of the truck he'd been hit with flashing before his eyes.

Investigation

Luna set her mug of coffee down next to her computer, her eyes scanning the files she'd brought up on multiple monitors.

She'd asked a member of the NSA to get her access to Oscorp's most recent files and he'd worked quickly, having Oscorp's mainframe opened and examined before sending the files that fit her request to her personal computer.

Browsing through several different files she focussed mostly on the projects that had a lot of funding behind them, always wanting to know what the money she gave to these companies was being used on, and trying to find a correlation between these projects and the Metal Gear black project.

Her official inquiry into Oscorp was not due to start for another three days, this time being needed to acquire warrants and premises searching rights, and in that time she decided to revisit Oscorp's achievements.

The first file that caught her eye and gathered here interest was the genetic engineering one, having been given a budget of six billion dollars from herself.

The project was headed by Doctors Curt Connors and Richard Parker.

She made a disgusted noise as she thought of the money she'd poured into Connors' and Parker's mad scientist projects, their attempts to 'Rewrite the genetic code and usher in a new age of self-controlled human evolution'

And like traditional mad scientists they'd started with animals, Curt working on lizards and Parker working with spiders.

She'd respected Dr Connors work, had seen potential in harnessing a lizard's ability to regrow their own limbs as a way to help amputees all over the world regain their full physical strength.

Parker on the other hand was a damn fool, a trait he'd passed onto that bastard son of his she thought, and had wasted half of the budget on trying to give humans spider powers, trying to fuse together the best traits of different spiders by altering their unspecialised cells during their embryonic stages, trying to use specialised cells from other breeds to create on genetically-engineered super spider.

He'd also worked on another project that was supposed to change humanity, before he started his work on the spider-soldier idea. A project she'd had a personal stake in by giving a budget of thirty five billion dollars of her own money as well as partnering with the then-young Victor Von Doom, a partnership between Latveria and America that was supposed to benefit both countries to alter the course of human life.

But instead the project remained unfinished as Parker had abandoned it to start a new life in England, the patent on the formula belonged to Victor, the bastard refusing to give it back to it's rightful owners, and Luna's hope for this new wonder-cure had been dashed against the rocks.

As this cure was essential to repairing both herself and her older sister, as well as Cadance should she need it.

But then Parker had returned only to once again destroy her faith in him, remaining adamant that he could not finish the project and that he was too busy as he'd dedicated his life to his new family.

"Traitorous bastard" Luna growled, taking another sip of her coffee "And fuck Doom as well... and him too"

Then she thought about the third party involved in the project, a great man she once admired, who had proven himself to be nothing more than a coward, focussed on only his own needs instead of her's.

The man who'd promised to give her everything she needed before leaving her with less than nothing.

"T'Challa" she spat furiously, downing the rest of her coffee before slamming the mug down onto her desk with a loud chink.

She was silent for a long second, staring angrily at the smiling faces of both Richard and Curt before deciding to see what Curt had been working on recently, his progress on the regenerative formula having slowed down in the past ten years.

From brief searching she was able to find that he was still working on the project, and had not abandoned it like his treacherous partner, and reports said he believed he was getting closer to finding a correct balance in the formula, less than a year if his calculations were correct.

She'd spent six billion dollars on the project, most of which was used up. And as much as she trusted Connors' ability to make progress she wasn't willing to give him another grant unless he showed her concrete evidence that his formula worked.

She knew he worked tirelessly to restore his own arm, and that his best bet was to use his formula. But if there was no formula to present there would be no funding to keep the project going and Connors would have wasted over twenty years of his life.

And, more importantly, a large amount of her money.

Her mind then went back to Parker's project, a mad scientist's fantasy as she'd described it over twenty years ago.

Impossible ideas backed up by a moronic coward" she mumbled, using the sentence she'd described Parker's ideas with.

But, if her hunch was correct, Parker's second biggest had project had been successful in creating Spider-Man, a man she held no respect for and no warm feelings about herself but it did not change the fact that Parker had been successful in creating his super-spider.

The same one she'd heard chatter about of being found crushed to death on one of the top floors on the tower, with a shoe print matching a pair produced by her niece's own fashion brand.

A strange thought occurred to her at that moment, her mind seeing Parker's spider formula as his legacy.

"One that should, by all rights, belong to his son" she said, tapping her chin with a slender finger "But the world doesn't work in that perfect a manner, Peter should have no idea about his father's work much less inherit it, that particular Parker hand-me-down hasn't been passed from father to son"

Awkward Reunion

"Hey Peter" Twilight said from the other end of the phone.

"Hey Twi, wassup?" Peter asked, pulling his sleeve down to cover the new suit as he landed on a rooftop.

"Are you busy right now?" she asked in a happy tone.

"No, what d'you need?"

"I'm cashing in that favour you owe me" Twilight said "Y'see, Celestia's making me tag along with the others to congratulate Mayor Maer on winning her second term of service as Mayor of New York, I don't know why she's making me come along specifically and she spouted something about getting to know those in power to make it easier to ask for favours, some well-thought out excuse to con someone with a smile as she often does"

"And you wanna drag me along with you?" Peter asked in a bored expression "Isn't Harry gonna be there?"

"No, he's being taught by his dad about how to be an asshole in the business world" Twilight said "But hopefully a successful asshole so he can make a lot of money and buy me things"

"That's quite a bitchy thing to say Twilight"

"I know, not really thinking straight, just had a glass of my brother's pre-workout stuff to see what the kick was" she said, verbally shrugging it off.

"And?" Peter asked.

"I can feel it Peter" she said.

"Feel what?"

"Everything" she whispered down the phone in an amazed fashion.

"Alright then Twilight, I'll tag along, just to make sure you don't eat someone while you're there" Peter said, hanging up the phone and shaking his head "What even..."


Peter made sure his costume was completely hidden as he walked over to the car where Twilight was standing with everyone else.

"Hey Peter" she said as he got nearer, her face showing no signs of the insanity that was brought on by her experience with pre-workout.

"Hey Twilight" he nodded, looking up at the city hall with a cocked eyebrow "So, this is the spot?"

"No Peter, we're just standing around out here for the hell of it" Twilight answered with an innocent smile.

"Alright, don't be so catty about it" Peter said.

"Sorry, just going through a few aftershocks from the pre-workout" Twilight said, rubbing her eyes and exhaling slowly.

"Why'd you take that stuff anyway?" Peter asked.

"Because Shining bet be ten bucks I'd go crazy if I did" she shrugged.

"And?"

"I now owe my brother ten bucks"

"Fair enough"

"Oh, hi there Peter, when did you show up?" Cadance said as she walked around the car they'd driven in.

"About a minute ago" he answered "Nice to see you too"

"How come you're here?" Cadance asked before holding up a finger "No, wait, lemme guess... Twilight couldn't bring Harry along so she brought you? Am I right?"

"Indeed, so what're we here to do?" Peter asked.

"Pretty much just to tell Mayor Maer that she has our political backing and if she needs anything she can come and talk to us" she shrugged.

"Sounds simple enough" he nodded "Are Luna and Celestia here?"

"Yes, they're already inside" Cadance said "And can you try to be nice to Luna, for just a few minutes please?"

"Only if she-" Peter said before catching himself "Right, you're right, half the time it's my fault... I'll behave, I promise"

With that the three of them walked into the city hall, seeing a large amount of decorative furniture mixed in with ornaments and plaques from previous mayors and public figures that had recognizable accomplishments in their lives and terms in office.

Peter spotted Luna and Celestia talking to the presumably Mayor Maer, a woman in her mid forties with greying hair and thin glasses resting on her nose.

The three of them seemed to be caught in an interesting conversation, this not stopping Luna's eyes glancing to the side to notice Peter, her face becoming sour upon spotting the teen.

Peter ignored the vicious look from Luna, turning back to look at Twilight who'd become preoccupied with several newspaper clippings contained in a glass case.

"Wow, Mayor Maer got to meet Daredevil?" she asked in awe "Tha Mayor without Malice meets the Man without Fear, wow, that's quite a headline"

"Yeah, looks like J.J isn't slandering DD in the article either" Peter growled angrily.

"Don't worry, he'll leave you alone soon enough Peter" Twilight chuckled.

"Leave him alone about what?" Cadance asked, standing closer to the teens than Twilight thought.

The purple-haired teen froze in fear, her mind locking up, whereas Peter's tongue was as slick and as silver as ever.

"I fucked up on an interview with the Fantastic Four a few days back, didn't take any photos while M-J had to do the whole thing without me" he said without faltering once, his lightning fast mind working as quick as ever "He docked my pay and wouldn't stop screaming at me for about three hours afterwards"

"Well, that explains why Mary-Jane was pissed off at you at work for a while, you two made up right?" she asked.

"Yeah, no worries, her seething hate for the Parker line has been quelled for now" Peter nodded.

"For now?" Luna asked from behind them, causing Peter to turn around with a smile.

"And speaking of hate for the Parker line" he said "It's nice to see you Your Majesty, you look lovely today"

Luna crossed her arms and looked Peter up and down with a raised eyebrow, several seconds passing before the Princess spoke.

"Flattery will get you far Parker" she said with a hint of a smile.

"I hope so" Peter said "I think we've been at each other's throats for a little too long now, so I'm willing to behave if you do"

Peter held out his hand to shake, Luna staring at his hand coldly for a second before extending her own and shaking it, both of them squeezing tightly before giving a single pump and breaking contact.

"Now then, forgive me if I seem rude but I'm afraid I must depart" she said to the others as well as Peter "I've other things I must attend to, good day"

They all said goodbye as Luna walked away, stuffing her hands into her long coat pocket before stopping and turning around.

"Oh, and Peter?" she said.

"Yes Your Majesty?" Peter asked.

"I've ordered some thing to be delivered to your house, nothing to worry about, just some items I found in your father's locker that I thought you might be interested in" she answered.

"Why thank you Princess, I look forward to receiving them" Peter nodded.

"Good, I'll send you the bill later" she said, turning around and walking away with a wave "Auf wiedersehen"

"Tschuss" Peter responded.

"A little informal wasn't it Peter?" Cadance asked "Tchuss is a goodbye used among friends, I would hardly call you and Luna friends now, would you?"

"No..." Peter said, stuffing his hands into his pockets with a grin, turning to look at Cadance "But I'm hoping to change that"

"Now my friends" Mayor Maer said, walking over to them as Celestia followed her "Can we begin our talk?"

"Of course Mrs Maer" Cadance nodded, the mayor giving her a handshake before greeting the other teens.

She stopped and looked at Peter, a question on her lips.

"You seem a fit and healthy young man, would you mind running up to my office and asking my assistant to set up my computer?" she asked him with a smile "Please?"

"Not at all Mrs Mayor, I'll be right back" Peter nodded "Where abouts am I looking for?"

"Up the stairs and the farthest door on the right" she said as Peter began to walk off at a brisk pace.

Peter made his way up to the top of the stairs and headed down the right corridor, finding the door he was supposed to enter and knocking on it.

"Come in" a female voice said in a familiar tone.

Peter opened the door and walked inside, the woman in the chair having it turned away from him and looking out of the window.

"Hi, the Mayor sent me to ask you if you could set up her computer" Peter explained "I don't know what for but she seemed excited about-"

The woman in the chair spun around and looked at Peter, the two of them freezing with Peter's sentence falling out of his mouth.

Ignoring the lack of red lipstick, neglecting the black wig she was obviously wearing and most importantly forgetting the lack of a black leather catsuit, the woman sat in front of him was a woman he recognized from his first big run in with the law, his first gang fight and his first time being fooled by a flirtatious fake-out.

"Cat?" he asked in a shocked tone, the green eyed woman staring at him in horror.

"Spider" the Black Cat asked, her eyes looking him up and down before they both blurted out their question.

"What the hell are you doing here?!" they demanded in unison.

Early Warning

The two former allies stood completely still, their eyes not moving from one another as the shock of running into one another had addled their brains.

"I work here!" Cat snapped, Peter's eyes dropped down to the name plate on her desk.

Felicia Hardy

"Alright then, Felicia" he said before his face showed a strange emotion: irony "Wow, that's... that's oddly fitting"

"Forget about that, what the fuck are you doing here?" she demanded "I told you to never look for me again!"

"I didn't, I'm here with my friends on a trip" Peter said in an effort to justify himself "And why do you work at the mayor's office?"

"Covers my tracks" Felicia answered before snapping back to her angry mood "Get out of here!"

"Hey, look, I know we don't like each other, but so far the others don't know that" Peter said "So until we leave each other alone, we've gotta act friendly"

Felicia put a hand to her face, sighing loudly before pointing a red nail at him.

"Fine... but just try to not talk to me" Felicia said, standing up and walking into the mayor's office "I'm not quite in the mood to feel like a paedophile today"

"Fair enough" Peter shrugged, turning around to exit before Felicia called out to him.

"If we're gonna be fair here you gotta tell me your name" she said.

"And why is that?" Peter asked.

"Honour among thieves" Felicia answered.

"Fair enough Ms Hardy" Peter said, turning around and smirking at her "The name's Peter, Peter Parker"

"Alright then Parker, get out of my sight" Felicia growled, Peter holding up his arms before turning around and leaving the room, the door closing with a soft click.

Felicia linked her arms across her chest before biting her lip.

"He's... he's still pretty hot for a fifteen year old" she said, drumming her fingers on her arm "No, focus Felicia, we're not into him any more right?"

Another moment of thought passed before Felicia shrugged.

"We'll see how he does today and we might give him another chance, that sound good?" she asked herself "Yes crazy cat lady who is sat in her office talking to herself, that's sounds amazing"


"And as you can see, we're planning to completely refurbish the upper east side of New York after what happened with the Avengers two years ago, that caused a lot of damage to real estate and gave rise to a few... shady characters in this city" Mayor Maer said with a nod, pointing to a section on the map with a ruler as she spoke.

The others were sat around listening intently while Peter and Felicia, both of them having been placed awkwardly together in the seating plan, were bored to tears.

"Has she done this before?" Peter asked, leaning in closer to Felicia.

"She made me watch and grade her rehearsals of it about thirty times before you guys came here" Felicia answered in a dull tone "It was interesting at first but holy fuck did it get boring"

"Fair enough" Peter shrugged, turning back to look at the presentation which seemed to be reaching a recess.

"Would we like some coffee?" Mayor Maer asked the group.

"I'd love some" Celestia said.

"Me too" Twilight answered.

"Me three" Cadance said.

The Mayor smiled and turned to Felicia with a requesting smile.

"Would you find fetching us a few mugs of coffee?" she asked.

"Nope, it's what you pay me for" Felicia said, pushing herself up out of her seat "I'll bring the jugs from the machine down, there's only four of them"

"I'll give you a hand" Peter said, getting up and stretching "I know you're used to carrying around big jugs, but only the two of them"

There was a unanimous look of horror on the faces of everyone gathered as Felicia stared at the grinning teenager with a cold look but, try as she might, she couldn't help but crack a smile before laughing quietly.

"I think you and I are going to get along brilliantly Mr Parker" Felicia said happily, truly tickled by the joke.

"I sure hope so" Peter grinned "So where are we headed?"

"Just through to the catering hall" Felicia said, nodding in the direction of two double doors.

He nodded and the two of them headed off through the doors, Felicia turning to Peter.

"I'm so glad we've had a conversation that lasted longer than thirty seconds before somebody brings up my tits" she said, casting a sideways glance at him.

"Kinda hard not to when they're the elephant, no wait, elephants in the room" Peter corrected, looking at the low-cut orange shirt Felicia was wearing "And you're not really making an effort to keep the puppies locked away are you?"

"No, I get cramps if they're squished against my chest all day" Felicia said, readjusting her bust for a moment "I already have to wear a corset in my costume to support my back"

"I didn't know you didn't wear a bra in your suit" Peter said, holding the door open for her as she walked through it.

"Thank you" she said "And believe me, when the winter comes, you'll notice it"

"I look forward to it" Peter said with a smile before his Spider-Sense began to buzz weakly.

He froze on the spot, his eyes whipping all around the room, trying to get a read on where the danger was coming from.

"What's the matter?" Felicia asked.

"Spider-Sense is tingling" Peter said quietly.

Felicia looked at him for a brief second before stepping closer and slapping him on the back of the head, a loud crack resounding through the strangely quiet building.

"Reasons please?" Peter asked, rubbing the back of his head with a stung look.

"You know how some girls say that their lovers words get them wet?" Felicia asked with a stern face "I think the sheer amount of loser in that statement just made me unhealthily dry Parker"

"Point taken" Peter said "Will never say that again"

"Good boy" Felicia said "Now what's up with your Insect-Early-Warning System?"

"Sacrilege" Peter growled, jabbing a finger into her collar bone.

"Are we in danger Parker!?" Felicia barked.

The explosion from the main entrance answered that question.

"Do you have your costume with you?" Peter asked hurriedly.

"Of course I do honey" she shrugged "Wanna watch me change?"

Peter blinked blankly for a second before raising a finger in questioning.

"I thought you said you weren't-"

"Force of habit, let's just go" she said, rushing off down the corridor.

"So is the offer still on or what?" Peter called as he ran after her.

Three-On-Two

The two of them, both dressed in their costumes, landed in the lobby of the city hall, seeing the back wall having been blown up and several security officers lying dead from varying injuries.

Spider-Man looked at the hole in the wall before turning around to look at the door.

"Does nobody use doors any more?" he asked in confusion.

"Of course not Spider" Cat said with a wave of her hand "Doors are last era's technology"

"So you're telling me that doors are changing?" Spider-Man asked "Are you telling me that they're going through a brand new form of existence, that they're re-evolving?"

"Don't you dare finish that joke" Cat glowered furiously.

"I believe you could say that they are... revolving doors" Spider-Man said.

Black Cat put her hands to her face and growled angrily, walking away from him and following the trail of dead bodies to a set of closed doors.

"Alright then, let's see what's behind door number one..." she said, taking hold of the handles of the double doors.

A second before she pulled them they were booted open by an enormous man dressed in black, standing nearly six-foot-six, with two smaller men behind him.

Black Cat was thrown backwards, Spider-Man leaping after her, catching her in mid-air and landing softly on the wall, activating his adhesive powers and remaining firmly planted.

"Huh" he said with a nod "Apparently it was pain"

"Ow" Cat said, pressing a finger to her head looking at the blood from the cut she'd just won.

"Indeed, apparently doors are evolving to replace us at the top of the food chain" Spider-Man said in a faux-fear tone "Spooky"

He dropped down onto the floor and let go of Cat, the taller woman getting into a fighting stance as the other three stood in an arrowhead formation.

"Alright, three against two" Spider-Man said "Can we handle that?"

"I handled worse working for Naughty America" Cat said, cracking her knuckles and her neck.

Spider-Man lowered his fists and turned to look at Cat with his head cocked.

"I... explain that later?"

"Explain it?" she asked with a wink "Honey I think I've got the video at home"

"Well, that's me evening-"

He was cut off by the smaller of the three men throwing himself at him at incredible speed, Spider-Man ducking under the swing he launched and retaliating with an uppercut to his stomach before crossing him in the jaw.

The small man went flying across the room with an audible cracking sound from his jaw, making Spider-Man flinch.

"Right, maybe I shouldn't hit normal people that hard" he said, squaring his stance as the middle-height man came rushing over to him with a baton "So pal, what do I call you?"

"You can't call me nothin'" he said in a thick southern American accent "But I can call you an ambulance if you want"

Spider-Man caught the blow from the baton on his arm and ducked to the side, sticking his foot out and causing the southerner to trip over it and slam headlong into the floor.

Spider-Man didn't miss a beat, leaping forward and, while the man was still skidding, slam his fist into the back of his head and knock him out in one.

"Cat, move on the big guy!" Spider-Man barked.

"Already doing that!" Cat snapped angrily, Spider-Man turning around to see her ducking and dodging from the surprisingly fast swings of their larger foe.

"Good job" Spider-Man said, only to see Black Cat get kicked square in the face and have the impact sending her flying backwards and skidding across the floor "And you blew it"

"I don't see you doing anything!" she yelled furiously.

"Fine, I'll give it a shot" Spider-Man nodded, sprinting forward and opening the fight with a jump kick, the large man catching it on his arm and pushing back against him, Spider-Man back flipping off his thick arm and landing in a low crouch, performing a basic coffee grin move to try and sweep his legs out from underneath him.

This soon turned out to be a mistake as the man lifted his foot up and brought it down on Spider-Man's leg, the red and blue hero snarling in pain.

He tried to bend his leg to pull himself towards the larger man only to have the beast-like man to slam his foot in the for of his legs.

A feminine squeak echoed from Spider-Man's mouth as the brute bent down and picked him up, swinging him around by the leg and throwing him into a wall, the thick bricks cracking under the force of the impact.

"Ugh..." he moaned in agony "Where are my save states when you need them?"

"How is that joke even relevant?" Cat asked, hauling him back to his feet while he remained protective of his crotch.

"Sorry, it's kinda hard to think when my balls are now swimming around in my skull" he grunted, moving his hands away from his groin before shaking his head to try and clear the pain "Holy fuck... I don't think I'm ever getting an erection again in my life"

"I'll fix that hun, don't worry" Cat winked before turning back to face the large man who was charging towards them "Move!"

The two of them threw themselves to the side, and by some divine intervention, used their grapple-slash-web to catch the man's feet, using their strength to trip him over.

"Move up!" Spider-Man yelled, the two of them launching forward from the tension on their lines and landing on top of the large man, Spider-Man using his webbing while Cat fired as many wrist-mounted cables as she could to try and keep him down.

"I think we got him!" Cat said with a grin.

The man began to try and lift himself up, yelling loudly before Spider-Man stamped on the back of his head, his nose breaking loudly as he was knocked unconscious by the blow.

The hero and thief looked at each other with tired expressions, both of them having been injured in the scuffle.

"Well... I think we can congratulate ourselves on a job-"

"Somebody help, they stole the safe with the city's security codes in it!" the Mayor yelled "The three were a distraction from some SWAT team thing, get after them!"

"Uh, some direction would be nice" Spider-Man said.

"They were heading towards Midtown when I saw them!" she said, pointing out the door "They left in a chopper, please hurry up and follow them!"

"Right, Cat?" Spider-Man asked his partner.

"I'm not really that bothered but, hey, another few fights and a little more time with you?" she asked with a grin "I'm up for it"

"Good then, let's get going!" Spider-Man said, the two of them leaping out of the blown up wall and heading after the chopper they could barely see on the skyline.

Job Done, Time for Fun

"So how d'you suppose we take down a helicopter?" Spider-Man asked, slinging past building after building with Black Cat grappling next to him.

"I could always flash the pilot and you could web them out of the cockpit" she suggested.

"Good idea, but I think he'll have the door locked" Spider-Man said.

"Couldn't you web it off?" she asked, leaping over a higher rooftop before grappling again.

"Too risky, could upset the helicopter's flight path and send it crashing into either the office buildings or the floor, where there's people" he said.

"So then what do we do?" she asked.

"I'm thinking we web-slash-grapple it into place, get the pilot to stall and then we fasten it to different building parts" Spider-Man explained "Then when it's supported enough I web up the rotor blades and we get the safe back and get the dudes tied up"

"Good plan, wish I'd thought of it" she nodded, the helicopter they were chasing now being several hundred yards in front of them.

"I'll give you credit on my blog" Spider-Man answered.

"You have a blog?" she asked.

"Fuck no, I may be a nerd but I'm not a loser Cat" Spider-Man said "Now I think the best place to go would be lower down, get a good angle on the body and make sure we can tie it up properly"

"Huh, one of my boyfriends who was into S&M told me the same thing" Cat chuckled.

"Luscious" Spider-Man said before making a vomiting noise "Move, now"

The two of them dropped lower down onto a rooftop, the chopper hovering briefly as the pilot, apparently an inexperienced one due to his inability to make a turn while moving, angled the chopper to go down the next street.

"Okay, fasten him!" Spider-Man ordered, leaping forwards and firing several web-lines at the chopper's body before landing on the side of a building and attaching the end of the web to it.

The two of them moved in rapid succession each one taking a look at their partner's movement pattern and seeing where they hadn't been able to connect to before filling in that blank spot.

The process was quick and relatively easy, the chopper's pilot panicking and moving the flight stick in all directions to try and pull away from the webs and grappling lines, but to no avail.

And to finish off the process Spider-Man swung underneath the body of the large chopper before launching himself straight up into the air, using his webbing to gunk up the rotor blades and making them unable to spin any more, the chopper giving in to gravity and dropping before being caught by the tension on the many lines attached to it.

The two moved fast, tearing off the door to the chopper and knocking out the pilot, taking the small black box from the compartment in the back and noticing several abandoned SWAT uniforms with fake rifles, along with a small silver pendant tucked away in one of the sleeves that dropped out when they began to move them.

"The hell?" Spider-Man asked, picking up the pendant and looking at it with a careful eye.

"Lemme see" Cat said, taking the pendant and looking at it, noticing a small symbol etched onto the side of it "Huh"

"Huh? Huh what?" Spider-Man asked.

"Nothing, just a hunch" she shrugged, dropping the pendant inside her costume's open front and zipping it up slightly more than usual "I'll get my intel guy to look at it and tell me if it's what I think it is"

"You have an intel guy?" Spider-Man asked in surprise.

"I've got a lot of guys that do a lot of things for me Spider, you'll be surprised how connected the crime world is" she said, grabbing hold of the pilot and attaching a line to him and then bolting it to the chopper before throwing him out of the vehicle.

"I don't think I would be really, I've played a lot of mafia video games" Spider-Man shrugged.

"Fair enough" she shrugged, looking out the window and seeing a police car, followed by several others, pulling up around the chopper's elevated position, taking the black box and throwing it down after whistling to one of the officers "Now, I'll be going"

With that she leapt out of the helicopter and grappled away from the scene, only this time Spider-man wasn't going to let her get away.

"Hang on!" he yelled, giving chase after her, webbing towards her until she threw herself onto a nearby roof, landing with a roll and getting up quickly.

He landed a few feet away from her and walked closer, pointing a finger.

"Don't think I'm letting you get away" he said "You're still a criminal"

"As are you, but I'm not turning you in am I?" she asked, crossing her arms and looking at him with a grin.

"I haven't killed any body, or robbed stores and committed acts of treason" Spider-Man said, pointing his finger for emphasis.

"I'm pretty sure you made that last one up" she said with a cocked eyebrow.

"As am I" he nodded "But that's besides the point woman, you still need to go to jail"

"And I also need to go to the dry cleaners and pick up my dress for Saturday's press conference, that doesn't mean I'm gonna do it now" she shrugged, strutting closer to him and placing a finger on his shoulder "And, uh, speaking of doing it now..."

"Hold up, I thought you said you weren't into me any more?" Spider-Man asked.

"I've said a lot of thing in my life and then changed my mind" she chuckled, dragging her finger down his chest and then up to his neck, resting her claw under his chin "And I've definitely changed my mind about you Spider"

"Why?" he asked "I thought the whole fifteen years old thing disgusted you?"

"It did, at first, but then I got to thinking... I've stolen, murdered, mugged and beaten people over a hundred times in my life so I can't really claim to have a strong moral compass can I... why not add another thing to that list?" she said with a wink, moving her face closer to his.

"Because paedophilia is insanely disgusting?" Spider-Man said as Cat lifted up his mask to his nose.

"I would hardly call it that, you're a teenager, that makes it ephebophilia and I really don't view fifteen years old as a 'child' when to comes to sex any more, you've seen it a lot, you think about it and you want it" she went on to describe "And when it comes to the act of sex you know what you've got and where to put it, I hope... so what d'you say Spider? Why don't you and me skip town and hang out at my place for a little while?"

"You're... you're actually offering to sleep with me?" he asked in shock.

"If you want to take all of the playfulness and romance out of it then yes, I'll come right out and say it" Cat said, rolling her eyes "I. Want. You. To. Fuck. Me."

Spider-Man was silent for a long second before Cat locked lips with him, pushing her tongue inside his mouth and wrapping her arms around him, Spider-Man placing his hands on her hips as they kissed.

They stood like that for a long moment before Cat broke away, whispering into his ear.

"So?" she asked "Your answer?"

"I'm gonna wreck it" he responded.

"Good boy" she said, moving back and taking him by the hand, leading him towards the edge of the rooftop "My apartment's this way and the day's dying fast, let's hurry up a little"

Spider-Man pulled his mask back down and picked up his pace, wondering exactly how far he could ride this train now that he was back on it.

Though he made a vow to enjoy riding the train this time.

And Felicia. He'd definitely enjoy riding Felicia.

Pillow Talk

Felicia's head hit the pillow, her usually thick and volumed hair now frizzy and all over the place, her chest heaving in exhaustion as her green eyes locked onto Peter's, a smile spreading onto both of their faces as the sexual high began to dissipate.

"Wow Spider..." she chuckled, running a hand through her hair to get it out of her face "I don't think you even broke a sweat during that... what time is it anyway?"

Felicia turned over and looked at the clock she had by her bed, noticing how long they'd been rolling in the sheets for.

"Holy fuck... forty minutes?!" she exclaimed, whipping back around and staring at Peter in amazement "I didn't think virgins like you knew where to put it in much less how to keep it there for nearly an hour!"

"Well, superhuman endurance is a thing I'm proud to have y'know?" Peter grinned, resting his hands behind his head and staring at the ceiling.

Felicia slapped him on the shoulder with a chuckle before continuing to speak.

"Look at you, you arrogant little bastard" she smirked "And besides, superhuman endurance is nice and all but the one thing you've gotta be proud of is that tongue boy, I don't think I've ever had a guy eat that good before"

"That's another thing, super strength Felicia, the tongue's just another muscle" Peter said, sitting up and rubbing his eyes.

"Are... are you even tired from all that?" she asked, lying down on the soft pillow and trying to slow her breathing down.

"Nope" Peter said, kicking off the sheets and getting out of the bed "And we have superhuman stamina to finish the trifecta"

"I am definitely keeping you around Spider, it's like having my own little sex god" Felicia nodded, looking at him as he walked over to the large wall mounted mirror "I can't imagine how good of a fuck you'll be when you know what you're doing"

"What?" Peter asked, turning around and leaning on the mirror "From what I heard I was doing pretty well, you mean to tell me you were faking it the entire time?"

"Not... faking it exactly, more like... exaggerating to help you feel better" Felicia said, rotating her hand as she spoke to accentuate the sentence.

"No, don't do that, that's what parents do when they congratulate their fat kid for getting a participation ribbon at their school's track and field day" Peter said with an angrily pointed finger "If I'm shit then tell me otherwise I won't improve and that'll end up bad for both of us"

"Awww, only hit it once and he's already looking out for me" Felicia beamed, linking her hands together and resting them against her chest "You're such a gentleman"

"Thank you" Peter shrugged, looking over his shoulder in the mirror at the set of scratch marks Felicia had awarded him for helping her achieve orgasm "And, uh, thanks for that too"

"Sorry, it's a cat thing" Felicia shrugged "We scratch when we get excited"

"Right, any other cat tendencies I need to be aware of?" Peter asked.

"Yes, actually" Cat said with an affirmative nod, beginning to count on her fingers "I really enjoy playing with yarn, I adore taking milk baths and I had a traumatic childhood experience that rendered me terrified of vacuum cleaners for the rest of my life"

"Right, the first two I understand, but what the hell happened in the last one?" Peter asked.

"I don't wanna talk about it" Felicia said with a wave of her hand "I might wet the bed"

"Lovely, so anyway, I've got another question to ask you" Peter said.

"I do anal if that's what you're asking"

"Duly noted, but who were those guys were just dealt with back there?" Peter asked "Mainly the three guys where only one of them was worth a damn?"

"They would be the Enforcers, made up of the Ox, Fancy Dan and Montana" Felicia explained "They're... well they were a legendary group of hired thugs who would sort out any problems a crime lord put them to... but with the rise of a lot of superheroes in the past twenty years, throwing that in with the mutants and aliens, looking at Ms Marvel here, they're not really good at their job any more"

"And I'm guessing the Big Man put them up to robbing those security codes?" Peter asked "What were the codes by the way?"

"Well, as much as it may not seem like it, New York is connected to an enormous server that scans and monitors all telecommunications, internet access and anything else electronic through an enormous hub, those codes would allow whoever had them to access the data stream the city has, including bank details, social security numbers and home addresses" Felicia explained.

"Oh, so it's like ctOS then?" Peter asked.

"And that would be?" Felicia asked in confusion.

"It was kind of a similar thing from a game called Watch_Dogs but we don't talk about it any more"

"Why not? I'm guessing it sucked?"

"Not sucked per say... it was just disappointing, from limited hacking interactions, which were the game's big selling points, a boring main protagonist named Aiden, repetitive side missions with no decent rewards, an awful level up system that included useless perks and just a lack-luster and really cliché main story just made it feel like a let-down, not to mention the downgraded graphics controversy it went through after E3 twenty-twelve" Peter explained.

Felicia took a long, quiet look at Peter before shaking her head in disappointment.

"You are such a loser" she said, getting out of bed and walking over to the bathroom door.

"What?" Peter exclaimed "I didn't even go into why the open world of Watch_Dogs doesn't feel real and how a vertical slice works in terms of video game presentation!"

"I'm getting a shower, you wanna join me?" Felicia asked.

"Is shower sex an option?" Peter asked.

"Yeah, that's the entire reason I got a two person shower installed to begin with, the water helps with the friction and makes it feel so much better" Felicia nodded "Come on then lover boy"

"I'm gonna wreck it!" Peter exclaimed, walking into the bathroom after Felicia.

Briefing

"So how are we gonna explain our disappearance?" Peter asked as he stuck his thumbs through the holes on the cuffs of his hoodie, pulling on the hoodie and the jacket before flattening the hood, the two of them having returned to city hall to collect their civilian outfits after their extended session together.

"Panic room" Felicia said in quick response, fastening her black wig back into place and redoing her shirt's buttons.

"A little bit more than that please?" Peter asked, checking to see if his valuables were still in his pockets.

"Well, each floor of city hall has it's own designated panic room in case of emergencies, like the one we just encountered, so we just say we went into that room" Felicia shrugged.

"And how do we explain the fact we were gone for over two hours?"

"The panic room has have secret tunnels that lead throughout the building, all of them leading to a small hatch about three hundred metres outside of the building that's disguised as a grave stone" Felicia continued "Then we say that we notified the authorities and we both went to a safe location before coming back here after we'd heard on the news that the threat had been dealt with"

"That's... that's pretty clever Felicia" Peter nodded "Good plan"

"You can't be a master thief without having a wide array of alibis and excuses to pick and choose from Parker" she chuckled "Now, let's go see how everybody's doing"

Peter nodded, beginning to walk with Felicia to the doorway before his phone vibrated in his pocket.

He took out the Samsung and looked at the text message he'd received, the number already being registered as 'Fury'

"How did he... never mind" Peter sighed, opening the full message and looking at it.

"What's up?" Felicia asked, her interest piqued by Peter's sentence.

"I've gotta go meet Fury at the Triskellion, they're gonna fill me in on everything they've learned about Their Royal Majesties secret black project" Peter answered "I gotta go, see you later"

"Alright then, see you later" she said with a soft wave.

Peter waved in response before heading out the door, a second passing before he stuck his head back around it with a raised finger.

"Felicia?" he asked.

"Yes Peter?"

"Does this mean we're a couple now?"

"No, not at all... that doesn't upset you does it?"

"No, not at all, just means I'm free to smash whoever I want"

"And who would that be? If you don't mind me asking?"

"Dunno just yet, I think I'm inclined to a certain shade of red right about now"

"Good to hear, give her a kiss for me would you?"

"Ugh, gay"

"That's the point honey"

"...You're gay?"

"Bisexual honey, there's a big difference"

"Good to know, see you later Felicia!"

"Bye Peter"


"So hit me chief, what did you guys find out about our mysterious Metal Gear factory?" Peter asked, leaning back in his chair.

"Next-to-nothing" Fury said in an agitated tone "Every place we checked for where Smythe's making the offshore Gears is completely impenetrable, the only hints we've got as to where the factories making the ones outside of America have lead to dead ends"

"And the reason you can't hack into the other countries data banks are?" Peter asked.

"You can't hack into something that's not connected Peter" Widow said, eating a bowl of Fruit Loops as she spoke "We know where the information telling us where to find the Gears is, they're on servers that aren't allowed to stream data in or out, and without that stream leaving a loophole we've got nothing to worm our way in through, so we don't get access to their data banks"

"Huh, y'know not many people know that about servers Widow, most people think that if a computer exists it's able to be hacked" Peter said "Good going"

"I told you, I'm not just a pretty face" Natasha nodded, finishing her mouthful "I've got other assets too"

"Yup, trained combatant, multi-lingual, stealthy, T&A and technical know-how" Peter said, counting her skills on his fingers "You're a regular super spy Widow"

"If T&A means what I think it means Parker, fuck, and thank, you" she said, eating another spoonful of the sugary goodness.

"Gotta love those mixed messages Widow" Peter said "It's almost like you wanna fuck me and then kill..."

"Black. Widow" Natasha said with an exaggerated nod "The clue's in the name kid"

"Can we get back on topic here?" Fury asked with a raised hand.

"Right, sorry boss" Natasha said, wiping milk from the side of her mouth before continuing "And the only way to get access to that data is to have an agent infiltrate the compound and hack into their server, something we're not willing to risk at this point, especially with the current situation with Korea and Afghanistan"

"Right" Peter nodded "So if we didn't get any info on the factories, did we get a good chance to look at Ray's capabilities besides his weapons?"

"Yeah, Smythe's made them out of vibranium" Fury said "That means no physical damage is gonna leave a mark on this thing's armour, the force'll just dissipate because of the virbanium's... well, vibration qualities as well as it's ability to become tougher depending on how much kinetic energy it absorbs"

"Vibranium?" Peter asked "The metal that's only found in Wakanda? How the hell'd he get a hold of that?"

"It's also found in Antartica Peter" Natasha said with a point of her spoon.

"Yeah, but that's a different variation, it's called anti-metal nowadays anyway" Peter said, clicking his fingers as he tried to remember a name "But the king of Wakanda, his name's... T'kalla or something like that right?"

"T'Challa" Fury corrected "And T'Challa can't do anything about the vibranium being shipped out of Africa, the mine it's taken from exists on Japanese territory, they'd spent a lot of money to set up and embassy on that exact spot about twenty five years ago for an old project of theirs" Fury explained.

"And that would be?" Peter asked.

"If you ever run into Wolverine, ask him and I'm sure he'll be happy to tell you about it" Fury said with a chuckle before growing serious again "Now as for this plasma cannon it's got built in, it's using a modified form of Stark's repulsor technology but, as you can guess, the blast isn't concussive, it's designed to melt and melt it will do, it's able to melt through steel in less than a second of contact and since it's being powered by a bootlegged arc reactor we don't have the luxury of waiting for it to run out of power"

"Great, what about his amphibious capabilities?" Peter asked "On the island of Manhattan something that can disappear into and re-emerge from water is gonna be a dangerous something to deal with"

"It gets better, the oxygen tanks installed in Ray's legs are well protected and kept cool by Stark's patented heat-resistance layering, so they can't be blown up by the heat of Ray's inner workings, and even then they've got up to six hours worth of oxygen stored in them as well as having an onboard carbon converter that can process the carbon dioxide created by the exhaling pilot and recycle it back into the tanks as oxygen" Fury explained.

"Right, so... what you're saying is that Ray's armour is indestructible, he's got infinite batteries, we can't overheat him and get him to blow himself up and we can't just keep him in the water and force him to drown?" Peter asked "How the fuck are we meant to beat this thing?"

"I was hoping you could tell us that Peter" Fury said "You've, I hope, played and beaten the games this thing's been in, so we hoped you'd know his weakness"

"Well... In Metal Gear Solid Two there were smaller, inferior versions of Ray that Raiden took down on top of the Big Shell with stinger missiles... but that's not gonna be good enough this time, even though it worked on Rex" Peter said, scratching his chin.

"Wait, Rex?" Fury asked "Who the hell is Rex?"

"Rex was the Metal Gear that came before Ray, the one that Snake fought on Shadow Moses after the Foxhound unit had taken over the island and threatened to launch a nuclear weapon with Rex unless the president delivered the remains of Big Boss to them within twenty-four hours" Fury said "Snake was able to beat him with stinger missiles butt hat was only after Grey Fox sacrificed himself life to destroy Rex's radar dish and let Snake get a shot on Rex" Peter explained.

"So... this came from a video game right?" Natasha asked after raising her hand "And video games are the whole 'Your Princess is in another castle' right?"

"Yes... where are you going with this?" Peter asked.

"Why the fuck is there a nuclear equipped, no, multiple nuclear equipped, walking tanks that are going to launch nukes unless the government hands over some fucker's corpse... and you mentioned a special forces unit or something like that? Who the fuck are they?!" she demanded furiously.

"That would be Sniper Wolf, Vulcan Raven, Decoy Octopus and Psycho Mantis, with their leader being Liquid Snake, the twin brother of Solid Snake who were the two surviving sons of a woman named Eva after she agreed to be a surrogate mother for the Les Infants Terribles project, which was something commissioned by a guy named Major Zero after the Cold War to create a new super soldier from the genes of supposedly the greatest soldier who ever lived Big Boss, Big Boss being the body that Foxhound wanted"

Natasha looked at Peter with absolute horror in her eyes, the most evident form of confusion on her gorgeous features that made Peter crack a smile.

"D'you wanna know who Major Zero is?" he asked.

"No... I want you to shut up and fuck off" she said, nearly tearing up "I've had briefings involving secret codes and threats to national security that haven't confused me as much as this shit just has... how the fuck did you remember all that?"

"I've got a good memory and when the experience is amazing you tend to remember it a lot better" Peter said "I still remember crying my eyes out as Snake crawled through the microwave corridor to get the Metal Gear Mark three to the port on on Outer Haven, which again is not to be confused with Outer Heaven which is another one of Big Boss's-"

Natasha then reached out across the table and slapped Peter across the face, the loud crack resounding throughout the quiet briefing room as the redhead continued to stare in fear.

"Just. Stop. Talking" she ordered "Can we get back on topic... please?"

"Right, Rex, Rex was the predecessor to Ray like I said, but the thing is that Ray was designed as an anti-Metal Gear to begin with, after Revolver Ocelot had leaked the designs and blueprints for Rex online after the Shadow Moses incident-"

It was at this point that Natasha screamed in frustration and stormed out of the room, her eyes wide and her hands clutching her red locks in an attempt to stop her from beating the life out of Peter.

The two men looked at her for a long second as she slammed the door behind her, then turning back to each other and blinking.

"Look, Fury" Peter said "If you want me to explain almost everything you need to know about these Metal gear UG's then you might wanna pull up a chair, order us some Domino's and get ready for an entire Wiki's worth on information"

A New Friend

"Wait... explain the whole Liquid-slash-Revolver Ocelot thing again?" Fury asked, shaking his head in complete confusion.

"Honestly man, I don't think my brain can go through that again without melting... can we just go back to our battle strategy with taking down Ray?" Peter asked with his own shake of the head.

"There isn't one so far kid, that's the problem" Fury said, sitting back in his chair and scratching the stubble growing on his cheeks "From what we've seen the outside of Ray is completely indestructible, so I've sent the plans down to Stark to see if he can get an idea of how to take this thing down through it's circuitry or A.I or something like that"

"Right, and how's he doing on that?" Peter asked.

"Pretty good if I do say so myself" Stark's voice said over the intercom installed on the desk "I think I've found Ray's Achilles heel"

"Good news Stark, I knew we could count on you for this" Fury said.

"Of course you could, this is me we're talking about here, I could probably take Ray apart with a screwdriver and put him back together in better shape if I wanted to" Stark said with a confident tone.

"Then can you try that when we fight him and just, like, not rebuild him?" Peter asked.

"Now where's the fun in that kid?" Tony asked with a laugh "This is your audition for the Avengers kid, we wanna see how you do in real danger with high stakes, not beating up some three-legged freaks with sticks in a back alley in New York"

"So you're telling me you'd risk the fate of the world just to see if I could pass a test?" Peter asked.

"He obviously doesn't know about Barnaul does he?" Stark asked in a happy tone.

"No... don't think I've told him about it yet" Fury said.

"Go ahead and tell him, I wanna hear his reaction" Stark said.

"What happened In Barnaul?" Peter asked, leaning back in his chair.

"Well... Tony wanted to test Natasha to see if she was a good a spy as she said she was, this was before they'd worked together officially, and he set one of his Jericho missiles to fire in random directions and locked the keys to the truck that controlled the missiles' launch in the truck itself and gave her a minute to pick the lock and shut it off before the missiles blew up a city" Fury explained.

"Let's be fair here Fury, the city was abandoned" Stark interjected.

"And was to be refurbished-"

"After they'd demolished it-"

"With hired contractors-"

"That wouldn't need to be paid when I did it for them!" Stark finished with a loud laugh "And when Tash couldn't get the truck open the look on her face was priceless"

"So... how did you explain that?" Peter asked.

"In a press conference while drunk" Stark answered.

"Ah, the traditional way then?"

"You know it baby" Stark said with a click of his tongue "Anyway, Pete, come down to my lab in the mansion, I want you to bring back the files to Fury and I also want to show you something"

"Why can't you just send them to Fury?" Peter asked.

"I like to keep old traditions alive, and I'll give you four hundred bucks if you deliver them" Stark countered "And don't you wanna see the cool thing?"

"I do like money, but I love cool things" Peter nodded "What is it exactly?"

"I'll show you when you get here, now hurry up Spider Express, you've got work to do" Stark said before his voice cut off.

"Well then, I suppose I'd better get to it then" Peter said, standing up out of his chair "I'll be back soon Fury, try and read up on the whole Liquid-slash-Revolver Ocelot on the Metal Gear wiki while I'm gone"


"So Stark my man, what've you got for me?" Peter asked, walking into the lab to see Stark standing over a computer with his hands held in the air.

"Alright then, just need to boot her up and see if she'd done" Stark said, turning around and pointing at Peter "Come here Parker, I've got a present for you"

"Is it three million dollars?" Peter asked as he walked towards him "I could really go for that"

"Nope!" Stark said "It's a woman! A fake one!"

Peter looked at Stark and then to the computer he was standing next to before waving a hand.

"Nah man, I can find plenty of those on Games of Desire, I'll pass this time around" he said, looking around for the SD card or memory stick Stark was going to give him "D'you pay up front or what?"

"Hang on Peter, you remember Cassie don't you?" Stark asked.

"Yeah, the Computer Aided Software Search Ingenuity Engine right?" Peter asked.

"Yeah... I'm quite surprised you remembered that" Tony nodded.

"Eh, I read the script" Peter shrugged before looking back at the computer "Does she work now?"

"Yep, just running a few basic system diagnostics and software boot-ups before she's ready to go" Stark nodded.

"Great, did you bring me here just to rub the fact you've got a second A.I in my face?" Peter asked.

"Nope, like I said Pete, she's a learning engine, she's designed to react and develop based on the experiences she has in her, well, let's call it her life" Stark explained "And with me, she's just gonna be hanging around the same corporate assbags all day every day and maybe meeting Pepper and Rhodey every once in a while"

"And that means?" Peter asked, rolling his hand to get more information.

"I'm giving her to you Peter" Stark said "With a teenager like you you're gonna be going to new places and meeting new people every day, I think she'll learn a lot from you if I'm honest"

"Are... are you serious?" Peter asked "You're going to trust me with one of the most advanced pieces of technology in existence?"

"Oh yeah, and that's not all" Tony chuckled "She's able to interface with any kind of port and is equipped with the most advanced hacking software in the world as well as having access to any database I want to give her... oh yeah, and she's able to interact with the city's data banks, Watch_Dogs style"

"Oh... oh that's fucking cool" Peter grinned "I get to be Aiden Pearce... except not shit... so, is she a program I can use on my PC or can she go on a laptop for portability?"

"She's an android app at the moment, optimized for the Samsung Galaxy Alpha... that's the phone you've got right?" Stark asked.

"Yup... so I just plug it in and download her right onto my phone?" Peter asked "How does she work?"

"Well, you can set her to only function like Siri or that shitty Cortana thing or you can just keep her on at all times and have her talk to you like a person... I'd recommended doing the latter of those two so she can actually learn some shit" Stark said "Want me to install her?"

"Sure, I could do with hacking some nudes out of people's phone" Peter said, handing his phone over and watching as Stark plugged it in and began the file transfer, unpacking Cassie into his phone and Peter catching a glimpse of her U.I.

It was a simple blue background with a flat line on it, the line he figured would move as she spoke to him.

"Now Parker, I'm putting you in as master controller for her, meaning that you're the one who has administrator control over her and can override any commands she's been given just by saying a password you choose" Stark explained "Just give her one when you get outside and you'll be good to go"

"Alright then, how do I get her to talk to me?" Peter asked as Stark handed his phone back to him.

"Just tap the line on the screen and select 'Activate' and get ready for the new age Parker" Stark said, gesturing for Peter to do so.

He activated Cassie and looked up at Stark, then back to the phone before speaking.

"Hello?" he asked.

"Hi there" Cassie responded in a clear, southern English accent "How can I help you Master Parker?"

"Oh... nothing right now, just wanna see how you're doing" Peter said, feeling a little suspicious that this might all be a big joke set up by Stark to make him look like an idiot.

"I'm functioning at maximum levels Sir, do you want me to run a status check on your phone?" she asked in a bright tone.

"I'm good thanks Cassie... say, would you be able to find me a video of a spinning seal please?" he asked, testing her browsing capabilities.

"Of course Sir" she said, going quiet for a brief second before a Youtube video of a seal in a pool began to play on the screen "Is this matching your request?"

"Indeed it is Cassie, thanks" Peter said, watching the video with a smile as the happy chiptune began to play.

"If you need anything else, just ask Master Parker" she said before going silent.

"Well... I think I'm going to like her" Peter nodded "I'm gonna like her a lot"

This feeling was strengthened when a cute little giggle was heard from the phone.

A New Challenger Approaches

"This better be good Hammerhead" the tall woman snapped, stuffing her phone into her pocket and glaring furiously at the brutish man "I'm risking losing business and you're risking losing your life if this turns out to be a waste of my time"

"Don't worry Mary, it'll be a good opportunity for you" Hammerhead said "The Big Man's got a proposition for you"

The woman in question was Mary DeMarco, one of New York's largest criminal identities and also the only female boss in the city. She'd been working closely with the Italian mob, the Falcone family, to try and push the Big Man out of East Harlem in an effort to reclaim the heroin trade in that area while giving the Italians run of the block in terms of 'protection' money.

She knew the Italians didn't like to sully their hands with drugs, saying that it ruined the image of class they had, and pushed it all onto her, earning the nicknames she often went by.

"So, Mary, what d'you want the Big Man to call you while you're here?" Hammerhead asked "We don't like to use real names, so I figure we'd use one of your aliases? D'you wanna go by Queen Key, Toxin or Narcotica?"

"They sound ridiculous Hammerhead, I've never been proud of those names and refuse to associate myself with them" she said with a wave of her hand, her green fingernails matching her dark green eyes "Though... there is a new one I've been given that I do quite enjoy"

"And that would be?" Hammerhead asked with a raised eyebrow.

"The Scorpion" Mary answered in a proud manner.

"Nice, respectful yet dangerous... where'd it come from?" he asked.

"It was given to me by the bastard child of the Vercettis, Jackie, told me that I was the kind of creature that would inject my poison, my drugs, into the good folks of this city and watch them die from it, and even if they survived it they'd never be able to live the same way they used to... he called me a scorpion and I liked the way it sounded"

"Fair enough" Hammerhead shrugged, gesturing for her to enter the large building.

She nodded, flicking her long black hair over her shoulder, she walked towards the front door, Hammerhead right behind her as he began to brief the mob boss on what the Big Man wanted to talk to her about.

Changing Ways

"So, I heard that within minutes of me leaving the whole place nearly blew up?" Luna asked her sister as she walked in the door, her face gaunt and tired from the non-stop interviews she'd had about the attack on city hall that day.

"A slight exaggeration sister, but yes, there was an attack" Celestia said "Several dead, mostly security and the codes to the city's data network were stolen by a group of highly trained thieves... only be to be caught and arrested within fifteen minutes by Spider-Man and a white-haired woman in a leather catsuit"

"Good to see that web-wearing bastard keeps in the company of whores" Luna said, standing up and walking over to her sister "D'you need a hug to feel better?"

"I need a drink" Celestia said, hugging Luna nonetheless before breaking away and looking at her with a smile "I'm proud of you for making up with Peter, I'm glad that you've gotten over your fake hatred of him"

"To be honest... it was kind of starting to affect my mental health having to be that angry all the time" Luna said, taking two glasses from the side and pouring scotch into the two of them "Though don't expect it to be all happy-dappy between Parker and I?"

"I thought you two were friends now?" Celestia asked with a disappointed expression before thanking her sister for the drink as it was handed it to her.

Luna took a small sip of the alcohol and swilled it around her mouth, swallowing before sighing in relief.

"That's good stuff" she said happily before returning to the topic "No, we're not friends, and we're not going to be"

"Then what was the point of making up like that?" Celestia asked in confusion, beginning to nurse her own drinks.

"Like I said, I was getting sick and tired of acting like a catty bitch all the time so I decided I would do something a little more fun for me"

"Which would be?" Celestia asked with a roll of her wrist.

"Not quite sure just yet... I might do the opposite of what I've been doing, might be a little... flirtatious with him if I feel like it" Luna said with a smirk, drumming her fingers on the crook of her elbow "I've never tried that approach before"

"Luna... I thought you said you wanted to keep him away from you?" Celestia asked.

"I did" Luna nodded "And still do"

"Then why are you going to be flirting with him?" she asked with a shake of her head "He's a teenage boy, if he so much as gets an idea that you might be into you he's going to throw himself at you whenever he gets the chance"

"I'm aware of that" Luna said with a downwards looked "And the fun for me comes in the fact that when he does throw himself I'm just gonna step to the side and watch him land flat on his face"

"That's... that's a horrible thing to do Luna" Celestia said "That could make him hate you"

"That's the point sister" Luna said with a chuckle "I despise Parker, always will to be honest, but I'm not going to make a big show of it, hopefully I can get him to fall on his ass in front of everyone he knows and completely ruin him... more than he does to himself that is"

"You're despicable sometimes Luna" Celestia said in a disappointed tone "He doesn't deserve this, nobody does"

"Oh I know that, it's just self-indulgent ego-stroking at this point" Luna said "I may seem like everybody's best friend when I need to be but trust me, deep down I'm a real nightmare of a girl"

"I know Luna, I've lived with you for nearly five millennia" Celestia said, finishing her drink and handing it back to Luna "Can I get another one please?"

"Sure" Luna nodded, turning around and walking back over to the table with the drinks on it "And speaking of living together, I think I'm gonna move out next week"

"What?" Celestia asked in a surprised tone "Really?"

"Yeah, I feel like I'm a little too old to be living with my big sister, even if it is a mansion we live in" Luna said "And besides, your daughter moved out years ago, so why shouldn't I?"

"Cadance isn't my daughter Luna, she's our niece" Celestia said "We've been over this"

"Well whatever Cadance officially is in relation to us she's a fucking miracle of science, poor Anastasia nearly died getting her into this world" Luna said, taking another drink "How much did you pay her for that by the way?"

"Can we get back on topic please?" Celestia asked in a distressed tone "I put that behind me a long time ago and don't want to bring it up again"

"Did you ever actually explain to her what she was?" Luna asked "Why she doesn't have parents?"

"Yes!" Celestia snapped angrily, tensing her hand in front of her "I told her when she was fifteen okay, now can we please drop the subject?"

"Fine, now I'm thinking of moving into a nice big penthouse somewhere in downtown Manhattan, to downsize from the mansion into a more manageable space for myself... and any lucky fellas I may or may not bring home" Luna said with a grin.

"Just make sure Peter isn't one of them" Celestia said "I know what you're like when it comes to your sexual habits"

"Hey, we were both raised in a time when there was no such thing as underage and legal age" Luna said "And you know how the saying goes, old habits die hard"

"Yeah, just make sure that 'old habit' of yours doesn't end you up in the state penitential for ten-two-twenty-five years sister, we're princesses but we're not above the law" Celestia said.

"Two things; one: This is New York City, the place where wannabe little girls and boys are doing anything they can to 'make it big' in this city and if you slide a little money in the right place your case disappears or a witness fails to show up, and two: I think we can both agree that we've done worse things in our lives then have sexual intercourse with a fifteen year old boy, can't we?" Luna said with a knowing expression.

"This better not be referring to the time in Elephantine-"

"Where the end result was a shortage of males to protect the outskirts of the city from raiders and neither of us being able to sit down for a week?" Luna asked with a raised eyebrow "Yeah, that's what I'm referring to"

"Yes, but we were young and stupid at the time" Celestia said.

"Celestia, it was in celebration of your fortieth birthday, there's was nothing young and stupid about it except for the slave boys we brought out to dance for us" Luna chuckled.

"But compared to how old we are now... we were nothing more than children" Celestia said with a guilty look on her face.

"Oh don't even try to feel remorse for it, you enjoyed it just as much as I did" Luna said, poking her sister on the arm with a grin.

"I regret it every time I think about it" Celestia said, trying to appear as wholesome and virginal as possible as she turned her nose up at her sister "It left us both with a terrible condition"

"And that conditions was the inability to be sexually satisfied by any less than three men at once?" Luna asked with a raised eyebrow "How long did it take for that to go away for you by the way?"

"About twenty-five years" Celestia answered after a moment's thought.

"Lucky bitch, it lasted for forty with me" Luna growled angrily "And in case that's still in effect can I ask you to remind me to buy a king-size bed?"

"...Yes, I'll remind you" Celestia said.

"And white sheets" Luna said with a click of her fingers "Hides the stains better"

"You're disgusting" Celestia said with a bemused look

"I know, I know" Luna said, holding her hands up in a surrendering manner "But hey, you know what they say these days, 'Guys want a lady in the streets and a freak in the sheets'"

"How are we related?" Celestia asked.

"Incestuous pregnancy?" Luna offered "We were born in ancient Egypt remember?"

"Ah" Celestia nodded with a mindful look in her eyes "Indeed"

But Wait There's More! If You Buy Two Tubes of FILLER Then We'll Throw In Two MORE Tubes of FILLER at No Extra Charge!

Peter sat down next to Harry, the two of them clapping hands and bumping fists before Harry came out of the gate swinging with his first question.

"I've been thinking about something, now don't freak out when I ask you this, but..." Harry began in an awkward tone.

"Go on" Peter said with a gesture.

"Now I know that you don't watch anime, that's a thing you stay away from, but from your limited knowledge of Japanese cartoons would you agree with me if I said that both Luna and Twilight could be considered anime black?"

Peter opened his mouth to respond before finding that he had no answer, scanning his mind to think of any of the black anime characters he'd come across on Youtube or top 10 lists for anything and realized that he hadn't seen any before.

"Uhhh..." he said, scratching the back of his head "What d'you mean by that?"

"I mean that... well because of the specific drawing style that makes anime... well, anime the faces are often very sleek on characters and they usually have similar features to one another" Harry began, gesturing with his hands as he spoke.

"Right" Peter said, not having been lost just yet.

"And because of this, including the wide eyes and thin noses into the equation, when it comes to anime artists drawing characters of different ethnicity they just... well they just look like white people with darker skin, they don't possess typical African-American facial features like thicker brows or wider nostrils and when some anime artists try to do it, bearing in mind these people are Japanese, they usually overdo it a little bit" Harry explained "D'you agree with me saying that?"

Peter put a hand to the back of his head and whistled quietly, picturing both of the girls in his head as he tried to compare them to any other black people he'd met in his life.

"Well... yeah, I mean Twilight's mixed race so it would make sense for her to have a lighter skin tone and inherit more features from her father while her mother is... then again... I think Mrs Velvet's mixed race herself, she and Twilight have the same skin tone too"

"If I could give an example of a character that Twilight and her mother look like in terms of skin tone I'd say Kirche Zerbst" Harry said.

"Who?" Peter asked in confusion.

Harry got his phone out and googled a reference picture for Peter to look at, the second teen's eyes widening in shock.

"Jesus fucking Christ" he said in surprise "How the hell does she stay up with those?"

"But do you see what I mean?" Harry asked "If I compare her to another female anime character, let's got with Rias Gremory from High School DxD-"

Several more seconds went by before the next reference picture came up and Peter began to see the point.

"Okay, can I just point out here that she looks like Mary-Jane to an almost scary degree?" Peter asked "But yeah, they all have the big eyes, thin noses and pointed chins, but yeah, that Kirche chick definitely has Twilight's skin tone, but, definitely not the body"

"Yeah, I think Kirche's more in line with Luna's body type if anything" Harry said, going back to the reference picture of Kirche for more evidence.

"Oh, look, we're not even past the second row and there's already an image of her with her tits out" Peter said with an unimpressed face "Apparently drawn in Okami's graphic style as well, which is just Japanese watercolours"

"But the funny thing is, if we compare Luna's skin tone with... let's say Yoruichi from Bleach-" Harry said, googling another reference picture for Peter to see "You can see that she matches Luna's skin tone perfectly but Yoruichi has Twilight's body type"

"Yes, that is something I can see" Peter nodded before looking back at his friend "Is... is there any other reason you called me to hang out with you besides finding someone else who agrees that our friends look like your loser cartoons?"

"They're... they're not loser cartoons Peter" Harry said in an agitated manner.

"Right, my bad, virgin cartoons" Peter said.

"I don't know what the hell you're laughing at, you're a virgin Peter" Harry growled.

"Well..." Peter said, swinging his arms around his friend's shoulders and pulling him closer "I wouldn't be too sure about that..."

"Yeah, what a load of shit" Harry said before looking at the knowing smirk Peter had on his face.

Harry's own expression dropped as the truth dawned on him.

"No way, with who man?" Harry demanded as Peter let go of him and began to walk away.

"You wanna catch a movie?" Peter asked "I heard they're doing reruns of the first four Rocky movies down at Cinema Three all this afternoon, your treat?"

"Only if you tell me who you slept with!" Harry demanded.

"You want deets?" Peter asked.

"I want all the deets man, if she's desperate enough to sleep with you then she's gotta be available for me" Harry grinned.

"Alright... totally telling Twilight you said that" Peter laughed, stuffing his hands in his pockets and walking away.

"Oh come on man, she'll fucking kill me for that!" Harry exclaimed in true terror.

"Especially when she finds out who I nailed and then that you want a go on her?" Peter asked over his shoulder "She'll kill us both man"

"Then just don't tell her dude!" Harry growled, grabbing Peter's arm and pulling him to a stop.

"Alright, but you're paying for the movies and the snacks" Peter shrugged "Now come on, I need to go watch Rocky fight Clubber Lang so I can get better at my own rope-a-dope technique"

X Marks the Men (Good Joke Right?)

"Hey Peter" Twilight said, walking into the room with a smile only to have it drop off her face when she saw Harry lying face down on the ground, panting in exhaustion.

"Uhhh..." she said, pointing at Harry with her thumb and raising an eyebrow.

"We just got through with watching the first four Rocky movies at Cinema Three and he thinks he's got the eye of the tiger" Peter shrugged "He can't even do twenty-five push-ups"

"How many can you do then Parker?" Harry asked angrily "I bet I can do more than you"

"I'll take that bet" Peter said, getting down on the floor next to Harry and getting in position.

"Alright, I'll count how many you do and then we'll see how many I can do" Harry said "The loser pays up five bucks"

"Fair enough, let's go" Peter said, attempting to do a push-up only to have his arms shake and be unable to lift himself off the floor.

"What's the matter Parker?" Harry asked in a gloated manner "Can't even do one?"

"Nah, it's just that when you've got a cock as large as mine it tends to weigh you down" Peter said before beginning to lift himself up, a look of boredom on his face as the number of push-ups continued to increase.

Harry watched in absolute shock as Peter effortlessly switched between regular push-ups, to one arm and one leg, clapping push-ups, one arm push-ups, Superman push-ups, using one arm to push himself up and switch to the other in mid air and then back to simple push-ups without breaking a sweat.

Harry eventually became bored of watching after ten minutes before simply stuffing a five dollar bill into Peter's hood and standing up again.

"You fucking show-off" Harry growled.

"When did this place even get a gym?" Twilight asked "Actually... did this place always have a gym?"

"Yeah, it was built with one and it's been updated as the years have gone by" Harry said "I think it's a pretty nice place"

"Speaking of nice places, d'you guys wanna go to the Ritz-Carlton to meet a few nice people?" Twilight asked.

"Hang on... is this what's it like to be born into a rich family?" Peter asked, holding up a hand in a questioning manner.

"What d'you mean?" Twilight asked.

"Well, Harry's a billionaire, Twilight has her parents' millions of dollars to inherit when she gets older... do you just do nothing but go and meet other rich and famous people every day?" Peter asked "Because I swear to God, I've met more people in the past two months I've known Twilight than I have in my entire life"

"Well... yeah, actually" Harry nodded "Most of our time, for me at least, is spent going with my Mom and Dad to parties and boardroom meetings where we meet investors, board members and foreign billionaires from places like Saudi Arabia who're looking for a slice of Oscorp's technology"

"Right... so it's kind of normal for rich people to do this?" Peter asked.

"Yes" they both stated.

"Right then, now that we've got that plot element out of the way, let's get going" Peter said, standing up and taking the bill out of his hood and stuffing it into his jacket pocket "Allons-y!"


The hotel lobby they walked into was definitely an extravagant one, with high ceilings and bright red walls adorned with pictures in expensive gold frames, hanging chandeliers and the general hubbub of rich people places.

Peter began to itch suddenly, feeling extremely out of place in his ratty outfit, beginning to attract the looks of several older women wearing expensive gown, dresses and outfits and their eyes were full of distaste.

"You alright there Peter?" Harry asked, patting his friend on the city.

"Yeah... I just don't feel comfortable here, these types of guys can sniff out a bum from a mile away" Peter said, scratching the back of his head nervously.

"Don't worry, just think about something they don't have that you do" Harry said "It'll make you feel better"

"Right" Peter nodded, closing his eyes and beginning to think "Eight-and-a-half inches, eight-and-a-half inches, eight-and-a-half inches"

"So, who are we planning to run into here?" Harry asked, ducking out of the way of people as they walked deeper into the hotel.

"Hang on a second" Twilight said, going up to the counter and smiling sweetly at the lady working there "Hi, my name's Twilight Sparkle, I'm here for the Metahuman Rights discussion, Princess Celestia informed me that there'd be two extra passes to allow my friends waiting behind the counter?"

"Oh, you won't mind if I ask you for I.D would you?" the woman asked in a friendly tone "It's just for security purposes"

"Of course not" Twilight nodded, taking her library card out of her purse and showing it to the woman.

"Okay, thank you Ms Sparkle" she said, handing the three of them passes attached to straps they could hang around their necks.

Twilight handed them to the boys before hanging hers around her neck and smiling happily.

"Alright then guys, let's get going" Twilight said, clicking her heels together before heading down the corridor to their right.

"Metahumans?" Peter asked with a raised eyebrow "That's the P.C way to refer to mutants, cross-species and superheroes right?"

"Yeah, you're not against those kind of people are you Peter?" Harry asked.

"Don't really think I'm in the position to be" Peter said honestly.

"How come?" Harry asked in an intrigued manner.

"I'm a cross species myself" Peter shrugged, Twilight's eyes widening in fear as she heard the conversation behind her, wondering what Peter was doing.

"Really, what are you crossed with?"

"I can't remember the scientific name for it but my DNA's mixed with a creature called an 'Amazingus At Sexicus'" Peter said, holding his hand out with his fingers splayed in a strange manner "Ask your mom, she'll tell you"

"...Fuck you" Harry growled, getting a laugh from Peter and Twilight breathing a sigh of relief that Peter had decided not to reveal his secret identity.

"And do you know who're gonna be here to give the presentation?" Twilight asked, turning around with an excited expression.

"Johnny Branson and the Nigletts?" Peter asked.

"The fuck's a niglett?" Harry asked with a bewildered expression.

"It's a racial slur for black children" Peter said "I shouldn't use it but I can't hear the word without thinking of that band name, with three little kids coming out in slim fit suits that perform exclusively covers of Aretha Franklin songs"

"That's... shit, that fits really well actually" Harry said "What's your favourite Aretha Franklin song?"

"Gotta be 'Say a Little Prayer', that was her best one" Peter answered.

"D'you know I thought her name was actually Urethra Franklin until I was, like, thirteen years old?" Harry asked.

"Yeah, I think we both did" Peter nodded.

"Guys!" Twilght snapped angrily "Can we get back on topic?"

"Right, so it's not Johnny Brasnon and the Nigletts?" Peter asked.

"Wait... wasn't the name Johnny Branson?" Harry asked "Why did you change it to Brasnon just then?"

"Backspace key's broken" Peter shurgged god fucking dammit.

"Fair enough" Harry agreed.

"Oh for-" Twilight snarled "It's the fucking X-Men alright? Jesus you guys are fucking impossible sometimes you know that?!"

"I am aware" Peter nodded "Can we go see Johnny Branson and the Nigletts instead?"

"Fuck everything you stand for Parker" Twilight growled, jabbing a finger into his chest.

"So that's a no then?"

Meetings

"So how many of the X-Men are gonna be here today?" Peter asked, following Twilight down the hall with Harry in tow.

"A few of them, I think Scott Summers, Jean Grey and professor Xavier are gonna be here" Twilight said "And since the event's being sponsored by Frost International we can expect Emma Frost to be here"

"Emma Frost?" Peter asked "I think I've heard that name before... what's she done recently?"

"Uhhh... I... I think she and Cadance partnered to make a company uniform for Frost International and Cadance helped design Emma's newest outfit" Twilight said, tapping her chin "She and Celestia put a large amount of money towards rebuilding Hell's Kitchen after the Avengers wrecked the place"

"Hell's Kitchen?" Harry asked "Wasn't that Daredevil's old stomping ground?"

"I think so... hey, whatever happened to that guy anyway?" Twilight asked "He just sorta... went away after two-thousand-and-three didn't he? After that really bad even with the Kingpin?"

"Yeah... he got hit pretty bad that year and, well, never recovered afterwards I think" Peter nodded, Twilight pushing open two double doors to see the usual group sitting down and talking to the members of the X-Men that had attended.

"Ah, there she is" Cadance said with a wide smile, waving to her little sister "And she brought the guys with her too"

"You're a little behind schedule Twilight" Celestia said with a joking smile "You're not getting sloppy are you?"

"I certainly hope not" Twilight said.

"Good, now come over here and introduce yourselves" Celestia said, gesturing to the X-Men with a hand.

They of course weren't in costume, this being a business-casual event where some of them, including who Peter presumed to be Scott and Jean, were dressed in casual wear, Scott having donned a blue shirt and black jacket with a pair of blue jeans while Jean was dressed in skinny blue jeans, a red shirt and a brown leather jacket.

Several others had dressed in semi-formal attire, one girl Peter didn't recognize a wearing skirt and a cardigan, this girl being a brunette with a high ponytail and cute green eyes while the other was also a brunette but with long, thick locks and a very peculiar looking white fringe that hung over her eyes who was dressed in suit pants and a white blouse.

Then there were the two of them that made a lasting impression the first being the wheelchair-bound Professor Charles Xavier, dressed in a black suit with a grey tie, and the second being the one that really caught Peter's eye.

She was a tall and slender woman, standing at five-ten, with slender cheeks, blonde hair and a large bust, something she was actively showing off by wearing a low-cut shirt, almost resembling a corset underneath a white jacket and topped off with white pants.

She fiddled with the silver choker around her neck, the colour of the choker matching the lipstick she wore, as she stood talking to Shining, the two of them seemingly friendly with one another as Peter overhead snippets of conversation about the times they'd worked together before.

It was at this point Shining noticed Peter and waved at him, Peter responding in kind before Shining waved him over.

The teen walked over to the adults and stood next to Shining, already feeling the woman he presumed to be Emma Frost.

"Alright Emma, this is my friend Peter, he's the best friend of the guy that's nailing my sister" Shining said, clapping a hand on Peter's shoulder "Although between us, I'd prefer for Peter to be nailing her"

"Hell of an introduction there buddy" Peter said, casting a sideways glance at Shining.

"Peter Parker" Emma said, holding out her hand with a gentle smile "Shining's told me everything about you"

"Well... I certainly hope not" Peter said, taking her hand and shaking it with a firm grip.

"A man of mystery?" Emma asked "I will inform you, it's quite difficult to remain mysterious around a telepath"

"Well, that's half of my personality out the window right there" Peter said with a nod "So, how do you know each other?"

"Aside from my day job of running my company I also run a small side business in sexual therapy" Emma began "And I was contacted by Celestia about... five years ago to help a young Cadance come to terms with her own sexual orientation without feeling disgusted with herself"

"What... what was Cadance disgusted about?" Peter asked, looking between the adults.

"Am I allowed to tell him Shining?" Emma asked the tall man.

"No, go right ahead, Cadance isn't ashamed of it and she went public with it years ago, I'm surprised he doesn't know to be honest" Shining said.

"Very well then" Emma nodded, turning back to Peter before explaining "You see Cadance is bisexual, a trait that she wasn't proud of at the time as she felt that it made her less loyal to Shining, the two of them having been dating for two years at that point and Cadance ready and willing to marry him. She felt that her attraction to women would combine with her high libido and she began to worry that one day she would do something she'd regret under the influence of alcohol or any other substance"

"And how did you help her?" Peter asked "I say help, convince her that there's nothing wrong with non-heterosexual relationships?"

Emma rose a well-maintained eyebrow at Peter's sentence, an approving smile touching her lips.

"You're not against homosexuality?" she asked "Most boys your age are quite scared of it, not just of homosexual males but also that they might be homosexual themselves"

"Trust me Ms Frost, I'm perfectly confident in my own sexuality, but I will say that gay relationships, especially male ones, do get a bad rap in modern society" Peter nodded "But I think bisexual women usually get the worst of it"

"Care to explain?" Emma asked.

"Sure... the thing is, with a gay relationship there's the stigma of it not being 'natural', so people are against it, with a lesbian relationship, be it courting or marriage there's that sexualized aspect to it that heterosexual males enjoy watching, but they then become angry when they realize that actual lesbians aren't into men, unlike the one's they see in porn" Peter explained, using his hands as he spoke "But with bisexual women, there's a strict difference, people adore bisexual women, but not in the same way a man loves his wife, more like in the same way a man loves his one hundred percent completion of Dark Souls being shown on his Xbox account"

"Okay... you've lost me there, care to explain in terms I understand?" Emma asked.

"What I'm trying to say is that bisexual women are often treated like the ultimate sex object, people discarding the fact that these women are still women that have likes and dislikes that affect the way they work, and see them as nothing more than sexual godsends, with every straight man wanting a bisexual girlfriend because they'll allow the man to have sex with them while she's making out with another girl" Peter explained "And that is what I find disgusting about the way bisexual women are represented, as mindless sex fiends that'll just say yes to adding a random girl into the bedroom because, hey she's into girls so that must mean she always wants to have sex with them"

"That's... that's not a view point most boys your age share Peter" Emma said with an approving nod.

"Trust me Ms Frost, if you hang out with me long enough you'll find out quickly that I'm nothing like most boys my age" Peter said with a smile.

"Good to hear, I've grown tired of dealing with immature little boys who think the only meaning to life is having sex with beautiful women all day every day" Emma said.

"And to be honest, it's not all it's cracked up to be" Peter shrugged.

"Amen to th-" Emma said before freezing in mid sentence, her mind only just registering what Peter had just said "Wait a minute, when have you ever-"

"Alright everybody, we're going to get ready for the presentation on Metahuman Rights" Xavier announced to all of them "If we can all get to our places we can get set up... Kitty, Rogue, you wouldn't mind hanging out with the others would you?"

"You want to get rid of us?" the high-ponytail asked in an offended tone.

"Not at all my dear, it's just that I do not wish for you to be bored listening to the same speech the others have rehearsed in front of us all every day for the last month" Xavier said with a kind smile "I think it would be much more fun for you to make new friends and tell them about a few adventures you've had at the academy, I'm sure they'd be interested"

"Well... if you think so professor then I ain't arguing with you" the girl named Rogue said, winking at Kitty before heading over to the other teenagers "Hiya guys, what's happening with you?"

"Go on Kitty, don't be shy" Xavier said after noticing Kitty staying still for a brief moment "They seem nice enough don't they?"

"I guess" Kitty said with a nervous grin "You know how I get around new people professor"

"And I also know you're a great girl when you feel comfortable, now go on, introduce yourself" Charles said with a chuckle.

Kitty nodded, turning around and beginning to walk before Emma walked over to her and put a hand on her shoulder, leaning close to the shorter girl's ear.

"If I were you I'd try talking to Peter, he seems like your type" she said.

"D'you think?" Kitty asked, looking at Peter as he shook Rogue's gloved hands, making a joke that got a chuckle out of Rogue that Kitty couldn't hear.

"Yeah, nerdy but kinda cool, he's also very well educated and level headed" Emma continued "Go say hi, he might take a liking to you"

"Uh... alright" Kitty said, taking a deep breath and smiling at Emma "Thanks Emma"

"No problem kid" the blonde woman said, patting Kitty on the shoulder as she walked out of the room.

Challenger, Ready?

Mary looked at the suit they'd prepared for her with an emotionless expression, the seconds ticking by before something in her finally snapped and hysterical laughter filled the lower labs of Oscorp.

"You're... you're not fucking serious are you?" she asked, wiping away the tears that had formed in her eyes "You seriously want me to run around in this enormous piece of shit, I mean you literally want me to dress up as a scorpion to take Spider-Man off your hands?"

"What's wrong with the suit?" Hammerhead asked, eyeing up the new piece of tech "It's a good suit"

"It's ridiculous Hammerhead, I wouldn't wear something like this to a fancy dress party" she said, walking away from the suit and patting Hammerhead on the shoulder "Find another moron honey, I'm not doing it"

"Well then..." Hammerhead said with a shrug "I guess it's gonna be bad news for you when the Spider comes knocking at your door"

"What d'you mean by that?" Mary asked, turning around and glaring at Hammerhead.

"I mean that, if the Spider keeps doing what he's doing he might end up having someone... point him in the direction of your little warehouse in the Bronx" hammerhead said with a wave of his hand "He might torch the place or worse, turn it over to the cops, now how much inventory did you say you had in there? Eight? Nine million dollars worth of every slang name for heroin on the Earth?"

"You wouldn't dare" Mary snarled.

"Of course I would, because the guy I've got backin' me up has the whole fuckin' city wrapped around his finger" Hammerhead chuckled "And the guy you've got? That old crackhead who hasn't been able to hold a piece with both hands without throwing it since he was thirty years old... face it DeMarco, you either get in the green jumpsuit or you get in the orange one"

Mary clenched her fist down by her side, holding a pointed finger at Hammerhead with pure fury burning in her eyes, her mouth open but no words coming out.

"Tick tock sweetie, the Spider ain't gonna squash itself" Hammerhead said "Now, let me run you through how this thing is supposed to work..."


Within forty minutes Doctor Octavius had hooked up the suit to register Mary's brainwaves, this enabling her to control the large stinger attached to the base of the suit and the retractable blades hidden in the wrists.

The suit's mask was awkward and large with an enormous point on the front of it that weighed her head down, the tail being a thick, bulbous weight that only served to offset her balance and the thick armour restricted movement in her legs.

"Are you fucking kidding me?" she asked, her voice echoing in the chamber-like space of the helmet "This is the most ridiculous thing I've ever fucking worn"

"It is just a prototype Ms DeMarco, I assure you we can come up with something better by the time you return from your mission" Octavius said in a meek manner.

"And that's killing the Spider, right?" Mary asked angrily, rolling her shoulders only to find that the thick shoulder plates clanked together and restricted movement there too.

"Not exactly" Hammerhead said, walking over to the armoured woman "We've watched the Web-Head's fighting style and we know that if he's up against one opponent he'll be able to move fast enough to avoid every fuckin' attack"

"So... what?" Mary growled "You're sending me out to get my ass kicked for shits and giggles?"

"No, your first job is to hijack the police convoy that's taking our Enforcers to the can and then bring them back here" Hammerhead said "Be warned that the Spider's probably gonna swing in and try to stop you, my advice is to get Ox outta there first and then worry about Montana and Fancy Dan, the Ox ain't too fast but he should be able to hold of Spidey long enough to get the others out"

"And once we're all out and against the Web-Head?" she asked, bending her knees and hearing the knee joints creak loudly.

"If you can squash him there, good to hear, if not, just make sure you can get away from him" Hammerhead said before turning and walking away.

"And what do I get in return?" she asked.

"Your ass doesn't go to jail and become Big Bertha's bitch" Hammerhead chuckled "Be thankful will ya?"

Champion, Ready?

Kitty sat next to Peter with an awkward expression on her face, not entirely sure how to break the ice between the two of them as Rogue had with him and the others.

While she sat quietly Rogue was busy nattering away with Twilight and Harry while she and Peter sat quietly, Peter having noticed her the second she'd walked over to the group and joined her friend, but she guessed from the way he reacted to her shy expression he wasn't interested in her.

He was probably into Rogue and not her.

Because Rogue was hotter than her, as everyone kept telling her.

She had cooler hair, a better attitude, larger breasts, in better shape.

The usual things that assholes reminded a lesser woman of constantly, things that shouldn't really matter but still eat away at you no matter how confident you pretend to be.

Her eyes lowered as she crossed her leg over her knee, her soft fingers resting on her thigh as she stared wistfully at the floor.

She, like most people, had gone through the motions of imagining what her life would be like if she'd started dating either of the boys she'd just met. Dates, days out, wedding... sex.

A shiver ran down her spine at the thought of that last one, the largest thing that Kitty was often teased for was her wish to remain a virgin until marriage.

Something that was seen as a sin by teenagers in this culture.

"Because who wants to stay pure and loving when you can have fast and hot sex?" Kitty thought to herself.

"Don't kid yourself Kitty" Emma's voice said in her head, causing her to jump in surprise "You'll find that most teenage boys don't know how to find where to put it much less be good at keeping it in"

"I know" Kitty thought solemnly "But... I still wish the others wouldn't make fun of me for it"

"Who makes fun of you Kitty?" Emma asked.

"The guys at the School, Bobby and Screech" Kitty answered.

"Well we both know those two are hardly ones to talk about virginity, the closest they've ever come to pounding a woman is punching a porno mag" Emma said.

This comment got a smile from Kitty, who then looked up at Emma on the conference panel to see her smile at the younger girl before turning back to answer the question given to her by another man on the panel.

"Just try talking to him" Emma advised "You'll never have a chance with him unless you say something to him"

"Uh, alright" Kitty said, turning to Peter and opening her mouth, blurting out whatever question came to mind "What do you think about genetically engineered crops?"

Peter turned to look at Kitty with a surprised look on his face, the smaller girl's cheeks flushing redder than a tomato in less than two seconds.

"Why?" she thought in agony "Why did I ask him that?"

"Personally, I don't like to call them that" Peter answered, leaning back in his chair and holding up his hands "I prefer to call them Frankenfoods... sure the name's stupid and it's a stupid idea but don't ever let someone tell you your idea is stupid, just remember that the inventor of the pool noodle is walking around a millionaire"

"He... he responded to that?" Kitty thought "Well... I guess that's a good philosophy to have"

"Trust me, I'm good at bullshit motivational phrases, its one of my amazing skills" Peter continued "I hold it right up there with being able to cook minute rice in fifty-seven seconds"

A smile spread onto Kitty's face as she giggled at the joke, the teenage boy seeming to be quite friendly towards her and genuinely funny.

"I'm Kitty, Kitty Pryde" she said, holding out her hand.

"Peter Parker" Peter said, taking and shaking firmly "It's nice to meet you"

"Yeah, you too" Kitty said, going quiet after letting go of his hand.

"Don't stop now Kitty!" Emma encouraged "You've got the introduction out of the way, strike while the iron's hot and get to know him better, ask him something else, and not as dumb this time"

"Right" she responded "Do you have a girlfriend?"

"Kitty?" Emma asked "Why?"

"I don't know, I panicked" she screamed internally.

Peter looked at her with a cocked eyebrow before a smile came onto his face.

"I'm gonna chalk that up to nerves" he said "Look, I know you're not the most extroverted person in the world, you're nervous about making new friends and all you want to do right now is establish some kind of grounding between us that'll make that friendship, but you're forgetting that you don't become friends instantly, you've gotta display personality traits and not try to come off too strong, which is what you're doing right now"

"Oh... I-I'm sorry" Kitty said, hanging her head.

"But I know the way people like you think, I used to be one of them before I turned thirteen and right now you don't know what to say, so just say whatever you want in bulk and we'll sift through it to find a good conversation, okay?" Peter asked.

"Okay" Kitty nodded, taking a deep breath before blurting out random facts about herself "My name is Kitty Catherine Pryde, I'm sixteen years old, one of my feet is slightly wider than the other, I was born with blonde hair but it turned brown when I was three, I once broke my foot jumping over a disabled ramp when I was eleven, I've never had a boyfriend or my first kiss, I'm jealous of my best friend because she's better looking than me and I have an irrational fear of Koi fish"

Peter's mind processed the information, going through it to find a good talking point before he locked onto one, another smirk touching his lips.

"Wait... your name is Kitty Cat Pryde?" Peter asked.

"Yeah... you can laugh at it" she sighed, waving her hand "Every guy does"

"That's fucking adorable" Peter said with a grin "And I don't think I've ever found anything adorable in my life"

"Oh... thank you" Kitty said with a nod "Not many guys think so, girls do, but not guys"

"And the koi fish thing?" Peter asked, leaning forward on his chair and cocking his head sideways.

"Uhhh... I fell into a pond when I was three and all the koi fish started swimming around me" Kitty said in an embarrassed tone, running her fingers through her ponytail in an anxious tick "I've been terrified of them ever since"

"Huh" Peter said "Just make sure that's not your super villain origin story, it's kinda weird"

"Origin story?" Kitty asked.

"You know, the thing that makes you become a hero or a villain, I've heard good ones like your parents being murdered in an alley by a mugger and then you dedicate your life to fighting crime, that's a good superhero origin, then there's bad ones like you get too close to an nuclear bomb and instead of being vaporized you turn into a giant grey werewolf-monster-thing" Peter answered "Then there's good villain ones like your friends and family turning against you in your time of need and you vow vengeance on them then get powers and kill them all"

"And a bad one?" Kitty asked.

"A bad one would be getting electrocuted by a live wire and then falling into a vat of genetically engineered electric eels and not dying for some weird reason" Peter answered "That one's a dumb one"

"Yeah... that is a dumb one" Kitty nodded.

"Would you excuse me for a second?" Peter asked, feeling a need for the bathroom suddenly "I need to go use the little boys room"

"Uh sure, go ahead" Kitty said, bringing her legs up on her chair and allowing him to squeeze past.

Peter made his way through the hotel, entering the lobby to ask where the bathrooms were before his Spider-Sense went off, a police convoy passing the front door of the hotel.

"Oh no" he sighed "They've got free sausage rolls back in the conference... ahhh"

And with the tragic heartbreak of no sausage rolls the teen ducked out of the hotel and into an alley, donning his costume of Sausage-Roll-Sacrificer-Man before locking eyes onto the convoy before a big green thing decided the armoured car needed a sunroof.

Round One: Fight!

Spider-Man landed loudly behind the green-scorpion-armour-person and knocked on the roof of the armoured car, the armoured figure turning around and staring at him.

"Alright Scorponok, if we wanna do this the easy way you'll wrap that nice big nail of yours around your body and jump in there with them, saves you getting hurt" Spider-Man said with a pointed finger "I've got a busy schedule and complimentary sausage rolls I'm missing out on here, possibly even imported J2O up for grabs"

"Wow" the armoured person, confirmed to be a woman, said with an impressed tone "They told me you'd be annoying but... fuck you're annoying"

"What?" Spider-Man asked "Is it the accent? I'm sorry if my mobster voice-"

He was cut off as his Spider-Sense warned him of an oncoming attack, the scorpion lady launching at him with her stinger extended.

He activated his adhesive powers and stayed strong, catching the stinger with the tips of his fingers and slamming his hand into her stomach, stopping her dead in his tracks.

"Sorry Stings, you're gonna have to try harder than-"

He was once again warned by his Spider-Sense about another attack, this one being a hydraulically powered knee strike to the chest, the proximity between the two making it impossible to block it.

A guttural coughng sound was spat from underneath the mask before she slammed the bottom of her fist into the back of his head and knocked him down onto the roof.

"Ow~" Spider-Man groaned, trying to get back up only to have the tail of the suit wrap around his waist and pick him up, the woman bringing him closer to her face.

"Well, you've certainly proven to be no challenge at all" she chuckled "Why is the Big Man scared of you again?"

"Give me a boombox, Conquest from Rocky Three and a montage and I'll show you why he's scared" Spider-Man said, trying to struggle free of the tail that bound him.

"Ah, and here are the lame pop culture references" she sighed, putting a hand to her face "And they're not even relevant ones... I'm disappointed in you Spider-Man"

"C'mon, eighties sports movies were awesome" Spider-Man grunted.

"Yes, they were, that I admit" she said, rubbing the suit's fingers on her chest "Much better than today's movies"

"Ooh, got some rose tinted glasses there Scorpinch?" Spider-Man asked "Lemme get those off for you"

He angled his wrists to her face and fired his web-shooters, the webs sticking to her eyes and blinding her before he yanked them down and slammed his forehead into the area where the nose should be on the mask.

"Ah!" she yelled angrily, the tail loosening for a second and allowing Spider-man to break free.

he dropped onto his back and booted the woman in the stomach, sending her flying off the armoured car and skidding into the street, the officers escorting the convoy turning on their sirens and aiming their weapons in response to the fighting.

She rolled to a stop, her tail stabbing into the ground to slow her momentum before she sprung back up and began to fire acid out of the tip of the stinger.

"Whoa!" Spider-Man yelled, dodging out of the way of the fizzling blasts "Where the hell'd you get that from?"

"Like I'm gonna tell you that" she growled, sprinting back towards the armoured car as it ground to a halt on the road.

The Scorpion leapt onto the roof and, using her tail, gouged the transport in half, releasing the prisoners trapped inside.

Recovering quickly she fired acid at the handcuffs they wore and it quickly melted through them, the Enforcers now free to join in on the fight.

"Oh, this'll be fun" Montana said in his southern accent, cracking his knuckles as Scorpion opened a small back panel in her suit and threw them out weapons "Got any suits to spare pal?"

"Don't get ahead of yourselves" she growled "And keep an eye on the Spider"

Spider-Man threw himself at the Scorpion, not really knowing where he was going with his plan, only to have the smaller, faster Enforcer named Fancy Dan move in front of his path and tackle him to the floor, the small man pinning him down before the Ox grabbed hold of him and slammed a fist into his face.

"We're gonna smash this little fucker here and now" Montana growled.

"That's the plan" Scorpion said with a chuckle.

"And this time he ain't got that little fuckin' whore to help him out" Fancy Dan chuckled.

"Hey!" Spider-Man snapped "That is a very sexist way to talk about my bitch"

Ox then threw Spider-Man into a wall, this allowed the Web-Head to recover and stick to the surface, this getting the others furious at Ox.

"What the fuck's wrong with you man?!" Montana demanded "You had him right there!"

"Oh... sorry" Ox said with an awkward grin.

"Don't be sorry, just don't be stupid!" Scorpion snarled furiously "Rush him now before he has a chance to recover!"

They all nodded before charging towards Spider-Man, the young superhero sighing in discontent as he was forced to rapidly dodge and duck around four opponents he knew weren't beatable at this point.

A leg sweep from Fancy Dan, a tackle from Montana, an acid shot from Scorpion and several brutal blows from Ox were more than enough to damage Spider-Man, the hero feeling his lip burst, his cheek crack, two ribs break and his head split again underneath his costume.

He managed to kick Ox off the top of him and roll back to a safe location only to have Fancy Dan move in with a brutal bicycle kick that opened him up for another, even more painful tail-whip from Scorpion that slammed into the side of his head and knocked him clean to the floor.

He lay there for several seconds, panting in pain before speaking.

"Ow... my hubris" he moaned, pushing himself back up to his feet and turning around, holding his injured side "Fuck... Steve was right... I don't stand a chance against heavy hitters like Ox, speedsters like Dan and... whatever the fuck Scorpella's classed as"

"Right then boys, what's say we squash this little bug once and for all?" Scorpion asked with a savage tone.

"Amen to that missy" Montana chuckled "These boots are primed and ready"

"Fuck..." Spider-Man thought, readying his legs for a fight or flight movement, only to have a brilliant flash of light blind them all, even the lenses on his mask providing no protection from the light.

He then felt an arm wrap around his waist and himself being lifted into the air.

he attempted to struggle bit fell silent when he heard the familiar female voice.

"Calm down, I'm helping you" Cat snapped "You can't beat these guys, not with her helping you out"

"R-Right" Spider-Man nodded, resting his head against Felicia's shoulder as she whisked him away to safety.

Realization

Felicia knelt in front of Peter with a clean rag in her hand and rubbing alcohol next to her, lightly dabbing and cleaning the cut he had on his forehead.

"Ow!" he hissed as the alcohol-soaked rag contacted his skin again

"Don't be such a baby" she sighed "I've hit you harder than that"

Felicia, after rescuing him, had taken him back to her apartment and allowed him to rest for a while after removing his costume to check for injuries.

After confirming that his ribs were indeed broken she told him to lie down on the bed in a position he found comfortable.

Felicia had then removed and hung up her costume, donning a pair of bunny pyjama bottoms and a cotton shirt, tied her hair back ad put on a pair of thick, black glasses.

"Right, sorry" Peter nodded.

Felicia was almost straddling Peter with how close she was to him, his hands on her hips as he slowly made circles with his thumbs on her toned stomach, Felicia's content purrs informing him he was doing well.

"So... d'you have any idea who the Scorpion chick was?" he asked, not willing to sit there in silence for the duration of his clean-up period.

"From her voice, I'd say yes" Felicia nodded "I think it's an older female mob boss who goes by the name of Mary DeMarco, runs mostly drug rackets and a few prostitution rings, likes to keep it classy as you can tell. She's the kind of woman you go to when you need hardcore drugs or a few indebted young girls who regret their life choices"

"Sounds like the first two things needed for a good night out" Peter said, Felicia giving him a particularly rough rub on the cut which caused more pain "Ow!"

"Sorry, my fault" she said, looking at the cut again before smiling at her work "There you go, you're all better now"

"Thanks Felicia" Peter said with a nod, preparing to get up only to have her press her hands on his shoulders and hold him down steady.

"Hey, you haven't paid me back yet" she said, wrapping her arms around his neck and kissing him, closing her eyes and holding him close.

"Felicia... c'mon, I can't" he said, moving away from her "I need to be back at the Ritz before everybody starts to get suspicious"

"They'll get suspicious about the mark on your head" Felicia said, moving her arms away and rolling her shirt off her body, exposing her bare chest "C'mon Spider... stay for a while longer will ya?"

Peter closed his eyes, weighing up the choices in his mind before breathing a heavy sigh.

"Two hours, three at most" he said, taking hold of her arms and lifting her up off him "I'll come see you then, but right now I've got to go back and see my friends, we're having a day out right now"

"So I'm not more important than some little girl and that Osborn kid?" Felicia asked with an annoyed expression.

"It's not a question of whether or not you're more or less important, it's down to the fact that Felicia Hardy and the Black Cat don't exist in the world of Peter Parker, you're part of the Web-Head's world, not mine" Peter explained, getting up off the bed and grabbing his mask off the bedside table, pulling it over his face before Felicia caught his hand.

"Fine, but you gotta promise you'll come see me afterwards" she said "And if you don't I swear I'll tell the Big Man who you are"

"You... you still work for him?" Peter asked "I thought you'd stopped that"

"No, why would I?" Felicia asked "The guy pays a lot of money"

"That's besides the point!" Peter snapped, placing his hands on her shoulders and staring angrily at her "He's a criminal!"

"So am I Spider" Felicia said, placing her hands on top of his and moving them down her body "Born a thief, raised a thief and I'll die a thief"

Peter hung his head, taking his hands away from Felicia's bare chest, much to her discontent before pulling his mask over his face.

"I thought you'd changed" he said.

"When?" Felicia asked, checking her clean and polished nails "When have I given any indication at any point in the time we've known one another that I'd even considered going on the straight and narrow? And boring?"

"You do realise that I'm going to have to take you in now, don't you?" Peter asked, grabbing hold of her wrist.

"Not so fast honey, are you sure you want me going to jail? Surrounded by other big girls, big mobster girls, that still have connections to the outside world and the Big Man?" Felicia asked "All I have to do is have one long conversation in the shower with any of the girls in the can and before you know it your window's got a molotov through it, your family's been murdered in an alley and you've got the entire New York criminal empire coming down on you with nobody to help you"

"You're... you're threatening me?" Peter asked.

"Yes, I am threatening you technically" Felicia nodded, placing a hand on his chest "But I prefer to think that I'm giving you a gentle reminder as to why it's a good idea to keep in my good books. You might be able to handle me in a fight if you do wanna throw me in the slammer, but just remember that I can sink you faster than a cannonball through the hull with what I know about you Spider"

She leaned in and kissed him on the cheek before giggling in his ear.

"So... with me knowing who's behind the mask... doesn't that make me more dangerous than the Scorpion or the Enforcers?" she asked him in a dark tone "They may be able to beat you in a fight but me? Welll, I can destroy everything you fight to protect by wearing that mask so fast it isn't even worth joking about. Now, you go have fun with your friends Spider and I'll see you when you come back, okay?"

The tone change in her voice was extremely startling to Peter as, for the first time in his career as Spider-Man, he was truly terrified of someone.

Felicia Hardy, the one woman he'd expected to have his back through this due to their special relationship was also the most dangerous enemy he'd fought so far.

She was right about it too. If he put her in jail she would expose him, put Aunt May, Harry, Twilight and M-J in greater danger than anybody else.

But if he kept her out of prison and actively defended her he'd be torn apart by the media, have aiding and abetting a known fugitive added to his rap sheet of manslaughter in the first degree, robbery, several counts of assault and battery, evading police and resisting arrest.

It was at this point that keeping Felicia around as a contact and a fuck buddy didn't really seem to hurt his reputation as bad as he'd originally thought it would.

"Alright then Felicia, you win" he said with a shrug "I will at this point now come to your every beck and call to keep you out of prison and make sure to do nothing that might agitate or enrage you"

"That's a good boy" she said, giving him another kiss on the cheek "Now can I get your phone number so we can keep in contact? I don't really feel like prowling New York and relying on Script Writer's Convenience for us to keep running into each other whenever we want to talk"

"I don't really know if that's a good-"

"I'll send nudes if you want"

"Right, so like most numbers it starts with-"

Intermission

"Uh, Peter?" Twilight asked as the taller teen walked over to her "What happened to your head?"

"Remember that door I had an altercation with?" he asked with a solemn look on his face.

"Yeah..." she nodded, not sure where he was going with this.

"He had an older brother" Peter answered, his attention being attracted by his phone vibrating in his pocket.

He took the device out of his pocket and looked at the message, it being Felicia taking a nude selfie in the mirror with her back turned to him and her tongue stuck out.

"Wow... she did not wait long at all" Peter said with an impressed look.

"What?" Twilight asked "What is it?"

"Nothing, just that Aunt May text me saying she was going to wait in line at the music store to get that new album she was on about a few days ago and that she didn't care how long it took" Peter lied "That was five minutes ago and she's just texted me back saying she'd gotten bored and decided to buy it on iTunes"

"Well... that didn't take long, did it?" Twilight asked, believing his lie.

"Nope, she didn't get to fifty-two by standing around waiting for it" Peter shrugged, replying to the text with a thumbs up emoji before locking his phone and putting it back in his pocket.

"So, what did I miss?" Peter asked, looking past Twilight to see what was going on.

"Nothing really" Twilight shrugged "They're just now talking about basic signs of mutation that can be recognized at an early age"

"Sounds interesting" Peter said, following Twilight as she began to walk down the corridor "What've they covered so far?"

"Well, so far they've gone over all of the powers of the current X-Men which was an interesting thing to listen to and now Professor Xavier is just talking to a few of the reporters to keep them interested" Twilight said, going through the doors and back into the conference room which had emptied considerably since Peter had left but, strangely, the first thing he noticed was Cadance lying sprawled on a couch near the back of the room against her husband's side with a pained look on her face.

"What's up with Cadance?" Peter asked Twilight, the young girl putting her hands on her hips and chuckling to herself.

"Just go over and ask her about it" she answered, still grinning "I'm gonna be talking to Rogue and Kitty for a while longer"

"Alright, have fun" Peter said, the two of them parting ways and Peter walking over to Cadance.

As he approached the multi-colour-haired Princess she looked up at him with a glossy stare, as if she wasn't registering the world around her.

"What happened to you?" Peter asked.

"The buffet table..." she answered weakly, resting her head on Shining's chest "Too... many... cheese bites"

"She ended up gorging herself on way too much food" Shining answered for her, looking down at his wife with a judgemental expression "Didn't you?"

"...Yes" she said in an ashamed manner.

"And now how do you feel?" Shining asked.

"Pregnant" she responded.

"And for about three weeks now you've been telling me that you're putting on weight, fifteen pounds too heavy and that you're gonna go on a diet and eat healthily" Shining said, rubbing his wife's sore stomach "And now you've just eaten your body weight in sausage rolls, cheetos and chocolate cookies"

"Help me" she whimpered, placing a hand on her husband's face and beginning to stroke it, Shining looking at Peter with an annoyed look in his eyes.

"I can break your neck if you want, end your suffering right now" Shining said.

"Does it hurt?" Cadance asked.

"Not much really, you just places one arm around the throat, firmly grab the under side of the chin and-" Shining said, performing each move as he said before rapidly twisting Cadance's head at an awkward angle, a loud crack echoing from her neck as she froze in place.

"... Never do that again" she said as her husband released her, rubbing her soft neck with her hands and swallowing loudly "That was horrendous"

"I know, I had one of the guys do it to me in training and the fucker actually displaced one of my vertebrae" Shining said "And that was a load of fun to put back into place"

"Was it really that painful?" Cadance asked.

"Have you seen the Dark Knight Rises?" he asked "The scene where Bruce gets his vertebrae in his spine pushed back into place?"

"That bad huh?" Peter asked.

"It was actually the worst pain I've ever felt" Shining said, rubbing his chin with the back of his hand as the memory came back to him.

"But you took it like a champ right?" Cadance asked, hugging her husband closely and nuzzling his chest before speaking in a cutesy-wootsy voice "My big, strong husband isn't gonna let a little agony keep him down right?"

"Actually, I just remember lying on the floor crying for about twenty minutes" Shining said with a chuckle "Then there was the time I got my arm dislocated in riot training, the time my Achilles tendon snapped during an assault course and the time I broke my nose by being a fucking moron and trying to one-hand a shotgun"

"Christ, I remember that" Cadance said "I was really pissed with you for it back then but I think we can look back and laugh at it now, right?"

"Yeah, you can" Shining sighed "I still have one nostril that's larger than the other from where the bone didn't heal properly"

Cadance prodded her husband on the bridge of his nose, making a 'honk' sound before he gently swatted her hand away.

"I thought you were supposed to be sick?" Shining asked.

"I am" Cadance said, snuggling into her husband's sides and closing her eyes.

"Cadance, you cannot go to sleep here" Shining said, shaking her shoulders only to have her groan in protest "This is a public conference that you can't go to sleep in"

"Then carry me into the lobby and book me a room" Cadance said, looking up at her husband with bright puppy dog eyes.

"But... isn't it like fifty grand a night to say here?" Peter asked.

"What's fifty grand again?" Cadance asked, sitting up and yawning with a stretch "I was never taught less than a million because I'd never have to deal with them"

"Wow... Cadance, I didn't think you had it in you to go into 'rich white bitch' mode that fast" Peter said, giving her a round of applause.

"Thanks, it's one of my many talents" Cadance said, sitting up and running her fingers through her hair "Now come on honey, I wanna go to sleep"

"... Fine" Shining said, standing up and straightening out his shirt.

"Shining?"

"Cadance?"

"Carry me"

"Cadance?"

"Shining?"

"I love you..."

"But?"

"Get off your fat ass and walk"

"Yes dear"

Woes

"Princess Luna?" Xavier asked as he wheeled himself over to the Princess, her dark blue eyes staring off into space as she swirled a glass of brandy in her hand.

The two of them were on the roof of the Ritz, the sky having long since darkened and a beautiful full moon hung over the city, the bright lights of New York reflecting in Luna's iris like that of a lost cat's; the beauty of the sight lost on the poor creature as it simply tried to find where it belonged.

She snapped back to reality as Xavier repeated her name, a surprised look on her face as she looked down at the mutant professor.

"Yes Charles?" she asked in a friendly manner "How can I help you?"

"I'd like to ask you a question, about a certain someone present tonight, downstairs that is" he began.

"And who would that be?" she asked, raising an eyebrow.

"The young master Parker" Xavier said.

Luna's face dropped at the mention of Peter's name, her body turning back to the ledge of the roof and leaning on it, a heavy sigh leaving her lips.

Unlike most times she faked no anger, there was no faux-rage to give anyone nearby the impression she despised him.

Xavier knew her true feelings about Peter, the feelings of remorse and loss, jealousy and anguish.

These emotions played across her mind and heart as she closed, her eyes, imagining the smiling face of the teenage boys cross-referenced to the first time she'd ever met him when he was nothing more than a mere infant.

"It still stings doesn't it?" Xavier asked in a soft tone.

Luna's answer was not immediate, her head hanging down as her eyes remained closed, a sick feeling in her stomach and a tightness in his throat.

"It's not fair" she said, rubbing her eyes as she began to feel tears form in them "He... he wasn't supposed to be-"

"I know Luna, I know" Xavier said, placing a comforting hand on her arm, the Princess finishing the rest of her drink and setting it down loudly on the ledge before turning around, leaning her back against it and crossing her arms "You feel betrayed still don't you?"

"Yes... but..." she began, looking down at her shoes and hanging her shoulders "Was it my fault?"

"What do you mean?" Xavier asked.

"Did I try too hard? Did I not try hard enough?" she asked, seemingly on the verge of sobbing as her voice shook uncontrollably "If I'd listened to him more, if I'd listened less, if T'Challa had accepted my offer or if I'd accepted his, if I'd bowed my knee to Doom's demands or if the opposite had been done"

"You feel that you're to blame for it?" Xavier asked "That's something you've never felt before"

"No... it's something I've never admitted" she whimpered, tears beginning to glide down her dark cheeks "I've spent the past twenty years regretting the choices I'd made for him, for us Xavier, I've drank, raged, sobbed, and screamed for hours at a time because I'd felt cheated... but I'm starting to think it was my fault that he left, that he didn't run away with her and instead that it was my own arrogance and unwillingness to admit my own faults that pushed him away"

Xavier said nothing, knowing that the princess merely wanted to vent at someone, anyone who was willing to listen.

"I forced him into situations that risked his life while telling him that he couldn't rely on me to bail him out of them, I pushed him to the point of breaking and when he couldn't live with it any more, when he'd hit a roadblock that he couldn't work past... the way he felt about me wasn't the same it had been when he'd started" Luna said, covering her face with her hands "I'd made him believe that I was a heartless monster when I was trying to stay strong, to not show any weakness to keep him steady"

"And then you found out about him quitting the project?" Xavier asked.

"He never even said goodbye" Luna growled "He never told me he was leaving, told me why or told me when I'd see him again... and when I did... he was with her"

Xavier nodded his head, joining his fingers and looking up at Luna, her eyes now red and her cheeks stained with tears, trying her best to keep composed when she was another three sentences away from breaking down in front of him.

"And because of how similar Peter is to his predecessor?" Xavier asked, knowing the answer "You push that hate onto him undeservedly?"

"Not just the hate..." Luna murmured.

"The love?" Xavier asked.

She didn't answer, but he knew from her change of posture that he was on the right track.

"And... do you share this view of romance alongside the view you hold about being-" Xavier said before being interrupted.

"No, that feeling died down years ago" Luna said, wiping her eyes and standing up straight, trying desperately to regain her dignity "I feel sick enough without mixing those two conflicting loves together"

"So what do you view Peter as in regards to yourself?" Xavier asked.

"To myself?" Luna asked, crossing her arms again "A lost dream and one of the biggest regrets I hold in my life"

Xavier remained quiet again, seeing the pain behind Luna's eyes as she took several deep breaths, straightening out her dress and exhaling slowly.

"That's enough" she said "I don't want to talk about this any more"

"That's fine, but if I may give you a piece of advice?" he asked.

Luna nodded, allowing him to continue.

"Tell him the truth" he said calmly "There's no reason he wouldn't understand if you just explained everything to him"

"No" Luna said, shaking her head and beginning to walk away "He doesn't need to know about this"

"Then it'll continue to eat at you for years Luna, the only way the pain'll stop is if you tell him and try to move on" Xavier said in a sharp tone.

Luna stopped and turned around, pointing angrily at Xavier.

"I've kept this bottled up for twenty years, what makes you think I can't do it for longer?" she demanded.

"The fact that my mere asking about it has caused you to break down... now if you'll allow me to ask another question?" Xavier requested.

"Fine, let's hear it" Luna said.

"Can you bear that pain in your heart while watching him romance other women?" Xavier asked "You've already admitted you feel for the boy, and you've always been the jealous type Luna. What's going to keep the rage inside when he dates other girls? When you see him with a ring on his hand, your proclaimed successor performing the exact same actions that nearly drove you insane the first time?"

Luna had no answer for this, knowing she was in the wrong, knowing that she would feel better if she told Peter everything she wanted to.

But she didn't want to.

Her pride, no, her ego was too large for her to admit her faults to the boy and she refused to openly accept that she was in the wrong.

Which was the mistake that had driven her love away all those years ago.

Didn't See That One Coming

The night and the conference had gone by rather quickly, with the clock rapidly approaching midnight and none of the attending party having left besides Cadance and Shining earlier in the day.

Luna had returned to the conference after her talk with Xavier on the roof and had proceeded to drown her sorrows in enough expensive alcohol to kill a person.

Mixing four different kinds of Russian vodka with aged Italian wine had given her a hell of a kick before her usual drunk attitude settled in: quietness.

Luna had taken to the corner of the bar where she had proceeded to drink for four hours straight, her body's healing factor keeping her brain and organs operating well enough to keep her conscious but her motor functions and inhibitions were severely impaired.

She'd been approached by Celestia several hours earlier to ask what the problem was but when her sister saw the look on her face she understood what she was feeling and left her alone, saying that she'd already booked them a separate room in the hotel, handing her the key and telling her to retire whenever she felt like it or when the bar ran out of alcohol.

She'd overhead a conversation between Peter and Celestia when the teen said he was going to go home with Celestia saying that it was far too late for him to be walking through the streets alone at that time of night and that it would be safer for him to just stay there.

Celestia had ignored his protests and booked a room for him before doing the same for the other teenagers with him.

His protests fell on deaf ears before Celestia silenced him with a finger placed on his lips.

"Now young man, you can't go through your life turning down other people's help" she said in a motherly tone "Eventually you'll be handed a burden that you simply can not carry on your own and that is when you'll need people by your side to help you"

"I understand that" Peter said, moving his mouth away from her slender finger "But I really don't feel comfortable with having you spend this amount of money on me without me being able to pay you back"

"You believe it's too much money to spend?" she asked, placing a hand on her hip.

"Yes"

"Then let me ask you a question"

"Go ahead"

"If I were to have one hundred dollars-"

"Yes"

"And you asked me to borrow five cents-"

"Uh-huh"

"Would you view that as too much money taken away from me?"

"I think I see where you're going with this-"

"Now if we were to take the money I myself possess in my own bank account, which is roughly nine-hundred-and-eighty-seven billion dollars-"

"Okay, see your point"

"Would five grand make that much of an impact?"

"Right okay, still gonna feel bad about it though"

"I'm okay with that dear boy"

"I'm not"

"You don't matter Peter"

"But you just said you want me to be safe?"

"Yes"

"Which means I matter to you?"

"Yes, indeed it does"

"But you just said-"

"Shhh dear boy, do not question my genius" Celestia said, pressing her finger to his mouth again before patting him on the head "Now, come with me to the front desk and we'll sort your room out"


Luna sat with her legs crossed on her bed, adorned in nothing but a pair of underwear and a white shirt she'd dug out of the hotel's closet, relatively sure that it had been cleaned within the past... century at least.

She stared at herself in the mirror, her drunken haze having worn off slightly but her mind still under the effects of inebriation.

"I should tell him" she sighed, resting her hands on her thighs, drumming against the toned muscle with her fingertips "He needs to know... I have to tell him"

After nodding in the mirror and taking a loud breath, she got off her bed and left her room, dropping her room key into her underwear and heading down the deserted corridor, the time now being half three in the morning.

She came to Peter's room, having been told Celestia where he had been put, and knocked quietly on the door.

Realizing that he was mostly likely comfortably asleep in the beautiful beds of the Ritz experiencing one of the best night's sleep he'd ever had she'd decided she'd made a mistake.

She hadn't knocked loud enough.

She pounded on the door with the bottom of her fist and waited for several seconds before a shorts-clad and shirtless Peter Parker tore the door open, his hair a mess and his bright green eyes blurry from sleep.

"What?!" he demanded furiously.

"I..." Luna said, her eyes travelling down from his face to his muscular physique, a girlish smile appearing on her face before she giggled like a schoolgirl "Wow"

"Eyes up here" Peter said, snapping his fingers in her face "What do you want?"

"I... I need to tell you something" she said, joining her hands behind her back and giving him a sideways glance.

"Go ahead" Peter said.

"No... it's private" she said "Can I come in?"

"No!" Peter snapped, pointing down the corridor "Fuck off!"

"Thanks" Luna said, pushing Peter back into the room and kicking the door closed behind him.

"Luna!" he growled, pushing her hand away only to have her wrap her arms around his neck, the much taller woman leaning close to him and staring at him with drunken lust.

"I want you" she whispered to him.

"Yeah, I want you too" Peter said "To get the fuck out of my..."

He faltered in his statement, only just realizing what Luna had just said to him.

But then he realized it wasn't the words that had been said that shocked him to the core, he'd heard this rap from Felicia before.

But it was instead the woman who said them.

This was Luna. Princess Luna, the woman who had made an active attempt to make their every single encounter a heated argument as the two of them nearly came to blows.

And now it seemed she wanted to make their encounter a very heated one indeed with an interest for several blows of a different kind.

The taller woman applied more weight to his body, forcing him to fall back before she guided his body back over to the bed, his feet catching next to it and the two of them falling onto the soft sheets, Luna pressing her mouth against his as Peter placed his hands on her rear, squeezing softly and receiving an aroused moan from Luna as she pushed her tongue deeper into his mouth.

The two of them made the effort to move further onto the bed before tearing at the limited number of clothes the other wore, the two of them desperate to explore their new consort's body as their encounter only became more heated and physical.

Sucker Punched

Peter was disturbed by the feeling of a weight being lifted off his chest, his eyes remaining closed as his barely-functioning mind began to slowly process the information.

He was roused slightly by his Spider-Sense buzzing loudly in his mind, warning him of something he was not yet able to react to, screwing his eyes tighter shut to try and block out the annoying warning.

He was then awoken by a brutal punch to the side of his face, the impact sending him rocketing off the bed and dragging the covers off with him as he landed on the flat of his hands, slamming his legs down into a defensive crouch before sticking his head up over the edge of the bed to see a naked and furious Princess Luna.

"What the hell was that for?" he demanded angrily, his cheek red and stinging from the impact.

"I can't believe you" she snarled, saying no more as she glowered at him in an enraged manner.

Peter heard the sound of a clock ticking in an echoey environment in his head, each tick slowly fading out of existence before the alarm went off, rage taking over from the confusion.

"Me?" he asked, getting back on the bed and pointing angrily at Luna "How can you not believe me when you're the one that just nearly socked me into twenty-ninety-nine!?"

"You took advantage of me when I was drunk!" she said, moving forward on her hands and knees and staring hatefully into Peter's green eyes "You fucked me without saying you could!"

"Are you kidding me?" Peter asked "You came into my room without permission and started molesting me!"

"I didn't see you trying to stop me" Luna said, crossing her arms over her bare chest.

"Didn't you just say I was the one that started it?"

"Yes"

"But you just admitted you did?"

"No I didn't"

"Yes you did"

"Prove I did"

"Prove you didn't!"

"There's no need to shout"

"You've just been yelling at me!"

"Prove I did"

"I'm gonna fucking kill you"

"Now, now, there's no need to resort to violence"

Peter clapped his hands to his face and screamed into them his rage being muffled by his palms before heard Luna chuckling to herself.

He brought his hands down to his lap and stared at her in rage, the woman batting her eyelashes before stalking over to him on all fours, swaying her behind as she placed her hands on peter's shoulders, pushing him down onto his back and pressing her body against his, looking at him with a seductive expression before becoming violent again, pressing her finger into Peter's neck and snarling at him.

"Three things boy" she spat "One; this never happened. Two; if you even try to tell anyone else about what didn't happen here then I will have you assassinated so fast it's not even worth joking about"

"I'd like to see you try" Peter snarled, not letting his Spider powers slip but knowing full well he could dodge a bullet.

"Oh yeah?" she asked, her face inches from his "How many places can you see out of the window in your house Peter?"

"A good few" he answered.

"Then keep in mind that's how many places you can get a bullet in the skull from!" she snarled, silence going for a long second before her tone of voice changed yet again and she placed a hand flat on his chest with a smile.

"And three... you're an amazing lover Peter" she said, kissing him again before wrapping her arms around his neck.

Before Peter could even figure out what the hell was going on with the now-suddenly bi-polar princess she released him, placed both hands on his chest and pushed him off, sitting up and moving to the edge of the bed where she stood up and leaned against the cream wall, crossing her arms and smirking at him.

"What are you doing?" Peter asked.

"Nothing... just thinking about how you're never going to be able to tell all your loser friends how you lost your virginity to a princess" she said in an arrogant tone.

"Oh yeah, me too" peter said in a faux said voice before holding his hands out to the side in an arrogant fashion before continuing "Probably because I didn't"

"What are you talking about?" Luna asked with a disbelieving tone "Don't try to lie to me"

"I'm not, you're not the first girl I've nailed and to be honest Luna... you're not the best either" Peter said, getting off the bed and walking over to the fancy bathroom door "And for as much as big a prize you're meant to be, you were kind of a let down"

Luna crossed her arms and shot Peter a sideways glance.

"Well... you didn't expect you to do my best on a little shit like you did you?" Luna demanded angrily "I was only doing it for my own sexual satisfaction"

"Then why come to me?" Peter asked.

"W-What?" Luna asked, caught off-guard by the question.

"If you were looking to get fucked by some kind of sexual demigod the why the hell did you come to a fifteen year old boy you thought was a virgin?" Peter asked with his own smug grin as he opened the bathroom door.

"I don't have to answer that" she snarled.

"Unless there were other reasons you wanted to come see me?" Peter asked "Like maybe a more... personal reason?"

"Don't stand there and think you're something special to me Parker!" she yelled, practically screaming in his face now "I can find and fuck a thousand other guys better than you within an hour! I could have you arrested, tortured and killed and nobody would be the wiser!"

"That's all well and good Luna, you can have me arrested, murder my family and slander my family's name" Peter said, petting her on the head before swinging on the door frame into the bathroom and giving one parting line before kicking the door shut behind him "But you can never unride my cock"

Luna stared furiously at the closed bathroom door, hearing the shower turn on and Peter begin bellowing an intentionally off key and high pitch rendition of 'Party in the U.S.A' before she stormed onto the bed and sat at the headboard, crossing her arms and staring at the mattress.

"I wanted to be your first time" she said in a heartbroken voice "If I couldn't be there for all your other firsts then... then maybe I could be there for that one, even if I was never supposed to"

Located

Peter had located a gym after leaving the hotel room, Luna mostly ignoring him except for a spiteful goodbye and he's found his way to the exercise area.

He had told them that his room had been booked by the Princess and, after confirming this they, allowed him to take anything from the store in the hotel free of charge as a sign of goodwill.

After telling the hotel manager he'd make sure Celestia gave a good word to the Ritz, which is the reason they'd done it in the first place, he discovered that the gym had boxing equipment, ranging from handwraps and speed bags to a full sized competition ring.

And since he didn't have a partner to spar with he made his way over to the heavy bag, acquiring handwraps and gloves before training his weaker left hook against the bag, feeling the awkward punch he threw every time cause an uncomfortable feeling in his left shoulder.

He also wasted more enjoy with each punch than he would with his right as his inexperience lead to more overcompensation for how weak he knew the hit was going to be which only served to cause more pain in his strikes.

He was interrupted when he heard a familiar voice behind him, lacking the usual confidence it had and was instead a meek and restrained sound.

"You're not used to fighting left handed are you?" she asked.

He turned around to see Luna standing behind him, dressed in her own freshly purchased gym gear with a towel hung over her shoulder.

"No, not really" Peter said "I'm an orthodox through and through"

"Southpaw's a hard style to master if you're not naturally cursed with it" Luna said, walking around to the bag and placing her hand on it.

"Cursed with it?" he asked with a grin, trying to start a bit of playful banter with Luna only to have the attempt fall flat on it's face.

She remained silent, slamming her fist into the bag weakly before bending her arm and placing her shoulder against it, her eyes downcast and moping.

"What's wrong?" he asked affectionately, placing a hand on her shoulder "You're not upset about last night are you?"

"Yes... no... I don't know Peter" Luna sighed, stepping away from the bag and crossing her arms "I'm not sure how I feel any more"

"It's... it's because of me isn't it?" Peter asked.

"Yes and no" she answered "I think it's best if I explain it to you later... at a better time"

"When's there going to be a better time?" Peter asked.

"When we're not in public" Luna said, nodding at the other people in the gym that were looking at them surprised as to why the Princess of America was conversing freely with some nobody little kid.

"Right, fine" Peter nodded with a gentle smile "When d'you think it'll be a good time to-"

Peter was cut off by the sound of his phone vibrating in his short's pocket.

He planned to ignore the call and continue talking to Luna until she opted for him to do the opposite.

"It's probably your Aunt, she might be worried about where you are" Luna said, looking down at the floor.

"Oh shit, you're right" Peter nodded in surprise "I forget to tell her where I was last night, oh she's gonna chew me-"

Peter checked the caller I.D and his words died in his mouth, seeing who it was.

Fury.

Luna looked at him with a cocked eyebrow, his surprised looked making her produce her own.

"Who is it?" she asked.

"It's my boss, he's probably just gonna dock my pay for not taking any shots of Spider-Man for a while" Peter answered.

"I hope the shots were with a rifle Peter" Luna said "That masked bastard needs a bullet in the back of the skull"

"A little venomous Luna, what the hell did he do?" Peter asked.

"I've had run-ins with the prick once or twice, and as a habit I don't trust vigilantes" Luna snarled "They're too unpredictable"

"Alright then" Peter nodded "I'm gonna take this outside so you can't hear him screaming at me"

"Right, fine then" Luna nodded, turning back to the bag and beginning to jab at it, her punches seeming infinitely more powerful than Peter's.

He quickly made his way out into the street where he answered the call and spoke.

"Hello?" he asked.

"We found one" Fury said.

"You found one of the Gears?" he asked in amazement "Where?"

"Natasha dug up the file after hacking into Chinese communication networks, they're shipping the thing tonight down the Hudson River in a large oil tanker" Fury said.

"And let me guess, it's being guarded by Chinese special forces wearing fisherman outfits?" Peter asked.

"Yeah... how did you know that?" Fury asked.

"Call me a veteran in the trading and deals of Metal Gear models" Peter said, looking over his shoulder as he spoke "When's it coming up the river?"

"Tonight at twenty-two hundred hours" Fury said "You need an excuse to convince your Aunt to let you go?"

"If you wouldn't mind" Peter nodded "And who's gonna be going on the raid for the Gear?"

"That'll be Natasha and you" Fury answered.

"Not that I don't wanna, but, why me exactly?" Peter asked with a raised eyebrow.

"You're our resident Metal Gear expert here Peter, you'll know how to take this thing down if it gets out of hand" Fury answered "I hope"

"Right, but if this gets out of hand I just want you to call the clean-up rig the Big Shell" Peter said "I'll see you there Fury"

"Good, remember to bring your work duds" Fury said before ending the call.

Peter stuffed his phone back into his pocket and sighed, wondering what he was going to say to Luna and, even more so, what she was going to say to him.

Horrifying Reality

"So..." Peter said, Luna having gone to the shower and made no protest when Peter had asked to talk to her while standing outside the showering cubicle "How... how much about last night do you remember?"

"More than enough" Luna answered, her general shape being visible through the thickly clouded glass as she washed herself "I remember the conference, the arguments between the X-Men and the journalists, the heavy drinking, the sex, the fact that you weren't too careful with where you finished despite the fact you weren't wearing a condom"

"You, uh, don't think you'll get pregnant do you?" Peter asked in a nervous tone.

"And if I did?" Luna asked in a calm one.

"What d'you mean?" peter asked.

"I mean, if you had gotten me pregnant last night, which for the way he had sex is a very likely possibility in normal circumstances, how would you respond?" she asked "What would you do with that information?"

"I..." Peter said, realizing that this was an extremely real, and likely, possibility at this point "I don't know... I really can't answer that question"

"Would you be scared of the prospect of becoming a father at fifteen?" Luna asked, her voice still as cold as ever.

"Would I be?" Peter asked with a nervous chuckle, trying his best to not have a panic attack "I already am right now"

He began to fidget nervously, his heart rate accelerating to a much higher pace than ever before. He was experiencing true fear at the possibility of having to share a child with Luna, having to sacrifice school time and the rest of his teenage years with the responsibility of looking after and fathering a child outside of a marriage with a woman who, until the previous night, had proclaimed her hatred for him every time they'd met.

He turned his head and looked into the mirror, examining his own face: Pale, sweating heavily and terrified at this new, frightening reality.

But the longer he stared the more he began to notice Luna's movements in the reflection of her outline.

He could see no shaking of her arms as they washed her hair, no heaving chest and no panicked breaths.

She was calm, almost too calm, for the possibility of carrying and birthing a bastard child.

Then he realized that it wasn't his life and image that would be affected the worst, it would instead be Luna's.

She would be slaughtered by the media, branded as a whore and a child molester, both for sleeping with a person she'd known for less than three months without the use of protection and also for that same person being a fifteen year old boy.

She'd face jail time, be branded as a piece of shit forever and would most likely have to abdicate her crown to somebody else due to the public no longer respecting or liking her.

He put a hand to his face and sighed horribly, knowing that he'd fucked up worse than any other point in his life and it was now his responsibility to work to fix it.

He ran the word through his mind several times over.

Responsibility.

Responsibility.

Responsibility.

Fuck putting on a costume and fighting crime because he felt he owed the city a living, he might've just gotten a woman pregnant, conceived a child he'd have to raise in nine months time.

This was where real responsibility came into play, he had the choice to use the powers he was so fond of to flee into the night or be a man about this and stay where he was and try to juggle school, homework, superhero work and fatherhood for the next five years before it just became superhero work, regular work and fatherhood.

Lowering his hand from his face he looked at the shower door with a determined expression before speaking.

"I've thought about it" he announced.

"And?" she asked, still sounding as nonchalant about this whole scenario as possible.

"I've decided I'm not running away" Peter said "If you are pregnant, if you have a child with me, I promise to stay here and help you loom after it if you'll let me"

There was silence for a long second before the shower spray stopped and Luna stepped out of the shower, her gorgeous wet body glistening as her hair was plastered to her neck, back and face.

"That's good to hear" she said with a grin, placing a wet hand on his shoulder "Because I've got one hell of a bombshell for you Peter"

"Which is?" Peter asked, his eyes wide with fear.

"Oh... I think you know what I'm gonna say Peter" she grinned, trailing a finger down to his chest before opening her mouth and explaining it to him.

And the words that came out of her mouth nearly made him faint.

Retcons of the Finest Calibre

"I'm pregnant Peter" Luna said with a small smile.

Peter's mind had to kickstart several times before it revved to life and the internal screams began to echo in his head.

"Are you serious?" Peter asked in a meek tone.

"No" Luna squee'd, spinning away from Peter with a loud laugh as she watched his facial expression change, the teen dropping to his knees and placing his head on the floor, his shoulders shaking as he laughed in relief.

"Oh... ohhh you bitch" he said, holding the back of his head as he laughed "Don't ever do that again"

"Oh man, the look on your face was fucking priceless" she said, clapping him on the back as she sat down on the tiled floor next to him "Sorry Peter but... god damn that was beautiful"

Peter sat up and looked at the darker-skinned woman with a weak smile.

"Why?" he asked "Why would you even do something like that?"

"I don't know" she shrugged, rubbing the back of his head as she began to calm down "But... wow that was fun"

"Right... are you sure you're not pregnant though?" Peter asked.

"Okay, just to let you know something for when you do find a woman that wants you to knock her up" Luna said with a roll of her eyes "It is impossible, unless under a full womb examination for a woman to tell if she is pregnant less than twenty four hours after internal ejaculation, even if I was pregnant I would have no idea if I was, the egg would still me multiplying it's cells to form an embryo right now nevermind giving me morning sickness"

"Right, okay then" Peter said, getting over his mini heart attack "But how can you be sure you're not?"

"Yesterday was a safe day" Luna answered, getting up from the floor and retrieving her towel, wrapping it around her moist body before tying her hair back behind her head "Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to get ready and talk to somebody about something"

"What about?" Peter asked.

"Nothing that concerns you" Luna said, sticking her tongue out and heading to the locker side of the room to change into her clothes.


Emma looked up at Luna as she sat down on the other side of the coffee table, crossing her leg over her knee and hooking her fingers around it before leaning back.

"So... what did you want to talk about?" Emma asked.

"Well it concerns Peter" Luna said, nodding her head to the side slightly "And it concerns last night"

"I'm guessing there was sex you regret?" Emma asked.

"Regret is a strong word" Luna said, drumming her fingers on her leg "I'd say 'Got what I wanted from him and now I don't want him to remember it'"

"So, what... you want me to wipe his memories of the sex you two had?" Emma asked "Why?"

"Two reasons mostly, one; I don't want him having that memory of me because he could go brag about it to somebody else and get me in a lot of trouble and two; I want to erase his memories of the conversation we had while I was in the shower, I kind of played a nasty trick on him and feel bad about it" Luna explained.

"Alright, but like most memory wipe requests I'm going to have to ask you to give me a solid reason as to why you don't want the selected person to remember it or else I'm not going to do it" Emma said with a wave of her hand towards Luna.

"Alright then" Luna said, closing her eyes and thinking of a good way to word her reasoning before opening her eyes with a bright look in her eyes.

"I want you to erase his memories because I made a mistake last night, I was drunk, lonely and horny and wanted something to remind me of a lover I once had, that person was Peter" Luna began "But the reason I want his memory of our sexual encounter erased is because I have very sensitive information that, when explained to him, could either drive him to suicide through the implications of our would-be-should've-been relationship or make him hate and despise me forever... so I think it would be better for both of us if he didn't remember that we'd fucked"

Emma was focussed on Luna until the last three words of the sentence before a large and imposing shadow hung over the back of Luna's head, a look of fear appearing on Emma's face

Luna noticed the look on Emma's powdered face and she raised an eyebrow, turning around to she a very angry looking Celestia staring at her with her arms crossed.

"Oh... I sister, how're you this-"

"You did what with Peter?" she demanded furiously.

"Oh, nothing really, we just, y'know, slept together" Luna said with a playful grin.

"Why are you acting like... no, wait, your body's releasing an extra amount of dopamine while it repairs the damage from your hangover isn't it?" Celestia asked "That's where this is coming from?"

"I wanna die" Luna said in a beaming smile "But yeah, are you against me getting rid of Peter's memories"

"If it was for the sake of you feeling ashamed of sleeping with an under-age child then no, I'd say you had to live with that for the rest of your life" Celestia said in an angry tone "But... you're correct in stating that having a previously sexual relationship with Peter could end up causing more damage to both his perception of you and cause some very confusing feelings for the poor boy if you ever decide to tell him the truth"

"So I have your approval?" Luna asked with a grin.

"Yes, go right ahead" Celestia said.

"Great!" she beamed, turning around to Emma and smirking "Go on then, wipe those pesky sexy-times away Emma"

"Are... are we not going to ask Peter if he's okay with this?" Emma asked "This is violating his privacy and taking away sensitive information that we've got no right to access"

The two sisters looked at each other with amused expressions before turning back to Emma and speaking their response in unison.

"N.S.A"

"Fair enough" Emma nodded, placing two fingers to her forehead and searching the hotel for Peter's consciousness, locking onto him and beginning to browse through his memories.

Her internal mind's eyes widened with shock as she saw him donning what appeared to be the Spider-man costume, time and time again before engaging in battles with criminals and super-villains.

Peter Parker was Spider-Man.

Then another moral issue came over Emma's mind:

Did she tell the sisters?

Doing that could land Peter in serious trouble, possibly even land him in prison for the rest of his life for what he'd done.

She knew he was a vigilante and vigilantism was a crime in this country despite the good will and intentions and that crime should be punished.

But then again she was also a member of the X-Men, a group that took the law into their own hands time and time again.

Taking a deep breath and filtering his memories to his sexual encounter with Luna to her vicious joke on him in the bathroom she destroyed them with a snap of her fingers, hearing brief snippets about something called a Metal Gear and one being transported up the Hudson River, but she paid it no mind at that moment.

Opening her eyes after severing her psychic link with Peter she nodded at Luna who grinned happily before relaxing in her seat.

"Now, once this fucking dopamine wears off I can go back to being in control and making sure to never drink that amount of alcohol around Peter again in my life" Luna said to herself in a happy tone.

"And did you learn anything else about Peter?" Celestia asked, rolling her wrist as she listed off several possible answers "That he's friendly, compassionate, understanding and not judgemental... anything like that?"

"Oh yeah" Luna grinned, placing a finger to her cheek "His cock's really big"

"Ugh..." Celestia said, turning away and storming away from her sister in a very unimpressed manner.

The Tanker Chapter

"What's the matter with you?" Widow asked as she pulled her black mask over her head, the thick, kevlar material shielding her face and hair from the pouring rain.

The two of them had been equipped by S.H.I.E.L.D with what Widow had described as 'Standard Issue Infiltration Gear' that included noise making devices, EMP grenades, comm jammers, night vision and thermal goggles as well as both of them receiving a codec to place in their ear.

Spider-Man put a hand to his head and sighed quietly.

"I dunno, headache I think" he answered "Feels like I've forgotten something and my brain's killing itself trying to remember what it was"

"Right, just make sure that it's not gonna cause us any problems while we're on the tanker" Widow said, looking over the edge and down into the water.

The two had been sitting there for just under twenty minutes, the location itself being the support beams underneath the bridge as to keep away from the cars that drove past on the bridge, even at this time of the night.

Sadly, the two of them hadn't picked an area that was protected from water and they'd both ended up drenched, but thanks to their insulated costumes they were both kept warm enough.

"Do we need to go over the plan again?" Widow asked, using a small camera to get a clear, zoomed look at the approaching oil tanker.

"No, I'm good" Spider-Man answered.

"Can you tell me what it was again?" Widow asked "Just to make sure we're on the same page here"

"We sneak into the lower levels of the ship, you taking the route to the Captain's quarters where they're storing all of the transport records of the other Gear units around the world as well as the names and signatures of those who signed for them, while I go down to the hangar in the bowels of the ship and confirm whether the Gear's near completion or not" Spider-Man explained.

"How are you gonna be able to tell?" Widow asked, turning to look at the shorter teenager.

"Trust me, I'll know" Spider-Man answered.

"Right, before you go I want you to do something for me" Widow said slowly, holding out her hand to the side.

"What is it?" he asked.

"Take my hand" she instructed.

"Why?" Spider-Man asked in an awkward tone.

"Just do it" she snapped.

He nodded and took hold of her hand, Widow slipping her fingers in between his and bowing her head, Peter doing the same.

"Now I don't expect you to say what I'm about to, but I want you to to copy what I do, alright?" she asked.

"Uhhh... alright" Spider-Man nodded, watching carefully as Widow began to mutter something in Russian before pressing two fingers to her forehead, then her wrist to her brow before moving her hand down and pressing it to her left breast, presumably symbolizing her heart.

Spider-Man copied the gesture as quickly as he could before she exhaled loudly and released his hand, looking down at the oncoming tanker without speaking.

"What was that about?" he asked with an intrigued tone.

"It's an old prayer that was taught to me by my master when I was younger, it's a Russian chant that translates to 'Keep my mind focussed, by aim true and my heart strong'. It's pretty much a way to calm yourself before a mission and kind of acts like a good luck charm for me, so I don't want your rookie-ness fucking me over this time" Widow explained.

"Alright... I'll try my best" Spider-Man nodded.

"Do, or do not, there is no try" Widow said sternly.

"Alright Yoda" he nodded, looking down at the tanker that was now directly below them "Let's get going"

"I'm on point, stay behind me and do exactly as I say" Widow ordered, wrapping her arm around Spider-Man's side and holding on tightly "Now, take us down"

"Right" he nodded, throwing the both of them off the edge of the bridge and dropping roughly fifty five metres before firing a web-line back up to the bridge and slowing their descent, their feet touching lightly on the deck of the ship before he released the web, the line launching upwards with a loud twang.

"Was that fun or-"

He was silenced when Widow clamped a hand to his mouth before dragging him down behind a large, on-deck oil barrel, jabbing her thumb backwards at the out-of-uniform soldier who was staring down at the deck with a flashlight aimed on where they had just been.

"Can that sense of yours scan areas to fin out how many there are?" Widow asked in a hushed tone.

"No... but I think I have something that can" Spider-Man nodded, slipping his phone out out his suit's sleeve and unlocking it.

"What are you doing?" Widow asked "This isn't the time to ask Siri for help"

"Not Siri" Spider-Man answered "Cassie? Can you hear me?"

"Yes Master Parker... why are we whispering?" Cassie asked in a hushed voice.

"Infiltration" Spider-Man answered "I need your help with something"

"Which is?" she asked in a calm manner.

"You can use the graphical interface on my phone and pretty much reprogram it to display any kind of image I want right?" Spider-Man asked.

"Aye, that is something I can do" she agreed "Do you need to me get a picture for you?"

"Kind of, can you use the wireless capabilities on my phone to send out a signal to detect radio frequencies present in the area I'm on and get me a live feed to a map of the ship depending on what floor I'm on?" Spider-Man requested.

There was a second of silence, a literal second before a green map appeared on Peter's phone with several small, glowing white blips on the screen with a line coming out of what he presumed to be the front of them.

"Done and done" Cassie said in a pleased manner "I even threw in a line of sight graphic for you so you don't have to peek out of cover to know where they're looking"

"Cassie, you are amazing" Spider-Man said with a hidden grin "I'm so happy I've got you here"

"Glad to be of service" she said before adding in a piece of trivia "Just to let you know Master Parker, I've detected several laser trip wires connected to a large network of alarms in this system, now my scans indicate they're connected to a server hosted in the captain's quarters and that they're wirelessly connected, meaning that if the server happens to crash then the tripwires won't be able to activate the alarms"

"And you're suggested a DDoS attack, right?" Peter asked "Does my phone have enough RAM to be constantly refreshing like that and still allowing you to function?"

"Don't worry Master Parker, I can allocate enough space on your phone's hardware and optimize performance even while running a dedicated task, such as a DDoS attack" Cassie assured him "What kind of basic bitch would I be if I couldn't do that?"

"I didn't know you could swear" Spider-Man said in an impressed manner.

"Do you want me to stop?" she asked.

"No, no, just don't overload the swears, it's very uncouth" Spider-Man chuckled "Can you stream the same image I'm seeing on my phone to one of Widow's devices?"

"Hm..." Cassie said in a thoughtful manner "She doesn't seem to have any devices on her besides her camera that has a screen, and without direct access to the device itself I can't alter it's GUI"

"That's gonna be a problem for her then if she can't see the enemy like I can" Spider-man said "What about her codec? I know you can't give visual feedback to her through that but can you give her audio updates?"

"Normally yes, but that would only be if I were connected to a secure network that she herself could connect to and even then with your phone's limited signal range and the vast size of the ship it would be nearly impossible for me to keep a strong signal between her devices and myself" Cassie explained "But, if you to hook me into a Wi-Fi network of some sort then I might be able to connect to both of you if you connect to that same network"

"Right... you said the data servers were in the Captain's quarters right Widow?" Spider-Man asked the other masked infiltrator.

"Yeah, that's where I need to go" she nodded "And I think you're saying that if the information hub of the boat is contained there then it might be reasonable to assume that the Wi-Fi router is connected there too?"

"Sorry to interrupt you two, but I'm afraid that it's not a router as such, not a wireless one at least otherwise I'd be able to access the network no problem, this ship's internet access seems to be controlled through dedicated ports and Ethernet cables" Cassie said in between a pause in their sentence.

"So... what?" Spider-Man asked "The ship's got it's own intranet?"

"I'm afraid so... and the maps I've brought up for this ship show that the only main access port for said intranet is located on... the bridge" Cassie said with a sigh.

"Which is going to be one of the most heavily guarded areas on the ship" Widow sighed, putting a hand to her face and growling "So we can't get access to the network here, meaning only one of us can take Cassie with us"

"Well... I know you may be more experienced of a stealth agent but I think you'd still better take her Widow" Spider-Man said, handing the phone to her "You can't sense these guys coming like I can and I don't have to stick to the floor, I can get up in vents and hide above these guys, so you'll be better off keeping hold of her"

"You're sure about this?" Widow asked.

"Positive, you'll need her more than I will" Spider-Man nodded "Oh and one other thing, don't try to access my Keepsafe Vault, it's very NSFW"

"I'll keep that in mind" Widow said, closing her hand around the phone and holding it down by her side "Alright, we split up now and get to work, then meet back here once we're done, okay?"

"Sounds like a plan" Spider-Man nodded.

"Right then... break!" she said, the two of them darting around the opposite sides of the large oil barrel and heading in different directions on the ship.

The Reaper

Spider-Man held his breath as he stuck to the ceiling of the corridor he was in, three heavily armed soldiers made their way down the hallway, none of them in uniform but still carrying weapons.

He waited for them to pass underneath him before slowly lowering himself down via web-line.

Once he was on his feet he threw the web back up to the ceiling to make sure it wasn't discovered.

Dropping into a low crouch he made his way down the dark green corridor, the ship lurching and creaking as it took crashing waves with barely a problem, the sound of steam hissing in pipes and distant footsteps causing Spider-Man's heart rate to increase dramatically.

Pressing his shoulder up against a corner he listened intently, trying to make out any sounds that could give away someone's position.

After all, there was no third person camera he could swing around the corner to see if someone was there.

So he employed another trick learned from stealth games.

He curled a fist and gently knocked on the wall he was next to, the metallic clanging sound echoing for several seconds.

"Huh?" he heard a voice say from around the corner "What was that noise?"

"Alright then..." he thought to himself, silently leaping higher up the wall and into the shadowed ceiling once again, his red and blue costume not being the most stealthy attire for this mostly-lit dark green oil tanker "Show time"

Knocking again on the roof, catching the man's attention once more he let out a shallow whistle, this causing the soldier to come and investigate.

Spider-Man then began to think of how he would go about this, whether it was best to knock him out with one punch or to try and just slip past him altogether.

The soldier rounded the corner with his weapon aimed, an ugly looking gun that Spider-Man recognized as a Fa-Mas, a rapid-fire weapon that could do some serious damage if he wasn't careful.

Because it was a gun.

The man looked around several times before Spider-Man shrugged his shoulders, dropping down onto the man and slamming a fist into the back of his head, the man crumpling like a sack of potatoes and being unconscious before he hit the floor.

He was preparing to congratulate himself before the man's hand, still holding the Fa-Mas hit the floor, the angle causing him to squeeze the trigger and the gun to fire until he kicked it away.

Which took him two seconds to do.

In that time several loud and alerting shots rang out, the bullets clanging around the inside of the ship before dropping to the floor with loud tingling sounds.

Spider-Man screwed his eyes shut under his mask in horror, counting the seconds before the inevitable happened.

Delta Four this is CP, we've received reports of gunfire, please respond?" the voice came over the radio.

He knew he'd fucked up now, there was no way out of this situation.

Either he responded to the radio call-out and have the the Command Point realize he wasn't working for them or he ignore it and have:

"I repeat, Delta Four this is C.P, please update us on your position?" the second request came.

"Fuck" he thought, balling his fists as the third and damning call-out came.

"Delta Squad this is C.P, Delta Four is no longer responding, any nearby units move to investigate" it said.

Spider-Man moved quickly, throwing the unconscious man up to the ceiling and webbing him in place there, sticking the Fa-Mas next to him and preparing to leave, not before grabbing hold of the soldier's radio on his chest and looking at the seemingly ancient device.

"Fury, you there?" Spider-Man asked.

Several tense seconds passed before Fury's eventual response came.

"I'm here kid, what d'you need?" Fury asked.

"I got a hold of one of the guard's radios, the frequency is one-four-nine-point-zero-seven, can you update my Codec to patch me through to that?" Spider-Man asked.

"Of course, don't forget you can switch between programmed frequencies by tapping the Codec in your ear" Fury said, going silent for a moment before his voice returned "Alright, you're in"

"Thanks" Spider-Man said, moving away from the position he was in and going through a door at the end of the hallway.

Slowly closing the door behind him he turned around to look at the room he was in, his heart launching into his mouth as he saw one of the soldiers sitting in a chair with his arms crossed, staring directly at him.

No, not at him, as the sounds of snoring gave away that the man was asleep.

Breathing a sigh of relief he made his way past the sleeping man and into another room, this one being the stairwell.

He began to take the stairs when an alert came over the radio, or the Codec as he had.

It was something that caught his attention and something that he'd need to discuss with Natasha.

"All units this is C.P, the White Reaper is now on board the vessel, if spotted do not engage as hostile, I repeat, do not engage as hostile" the Command Point said.

"The... The White Reaper?" Spider-Man asked, switching his frequency over to Natasha's codec "Widow, you there?"

Gimme a sec" she said, sounding like she was in the middle of something strenuous before the loud sound of a neck being broken came through the Codec before she breathed a sigh of relief "What is it?"

"Does the name White Reaper mean anything to you?" he asked.

The deafening silence following the question obviously meant something to Natasha and it only served to heighten Spider-Man's intrigue level.

"Where did you hear that name?" she demanded.

"She's apparently on the ship now" Spider-Man answered "Who is she?"

"The White Reaper is the favourite nickname of a woman named Alexis Winters, she goes by other names like the White Death, Winter's Coldest Breath, the Winter Warlord and her second favourite name; Sightlock" Widow explained "She's on record for being the greatest sniper in the world, able to put a bullet between the eyes of an F-22 two pilot from over two thousand meters due to her accelerated processing functions"

"So she's bad news bears then?" Spider-Man asked with an excited tone "Is she a fighter?"

"She doesn't need to be because nobody ever gets close enough to even try" Widow continued "She also has a record she's proud of: she's never missed a shot in her life"

"What... seriously?" Spider-Man asked, looking over his shoulder to make sure there was nobody there "Even as a kid?"

"Even as a kid, she's a mutant Peter, her brain processes information faster than anybody else's, the lay of the land, wind speed, light level, bullet drop, and because of that she's able to land every shot she fires because she can practically see where her target's gonna be, even if he moves" Widow detailed "She's also an expert psychologist who can analyse everything about her opponent's combat experience and how they operate just from the way they stand, making her able to find out how they'll move if she's picking off a running target"

"That's... that's kinda scary" Spider-Man said "And if I happen to run across her?"

"Run" was all she said.

"Right, I'll keep that in mind..." Spider-Man said, becoming quiet for a moment before asking another question "Have you gone up against her before?"

"Yeah... once" she said in a heavy tone.

"I'm guessing it didn't go too well?" Spider-Man assumed.

"She put me in the hospital for a month after putting a bullet in my thigh and one through my chest" Widow said after a moment's hesitation "So you can say that we're quite familiar with each other, stay away from her kid, I'm warning you"

"Right, I'll stay out of her way" Spider-Man nodded "Spidey out"

Switching back to the soldier's frequency he was just in time to catch a broadcast from none other than Alistair Smythe himself.

"-And as a fair warning to all of you it concerns, we're having to forgo the restocking trip on the Hudson as we've been found out, an investigation has been launched by the Royal Family into the Metal Gear project... based on a tip from that Spider-Man bastard... so yes, before you start complaining about it, there'll be no more breaks until Ray is secured an area no one can discover him"

Spider-Man listened to the broadcast as he made his way through the strangely empty corridors, making his way deeper into the ship.

Several floors further down he caught a glimpse of a white-haired woman disappearing around a corner of the hallway he'd arrived in.

"Felicia?" he asked himself before shaking his head "No... too short... who was she?"

He followed after her, stopping at the corner and ducking his head around it to peek at her only to have his Spider-Sense blaring to warn him of the obvious.

The woman had spotted him before she'd gone around the corner and had prepared herself, the barrel of a Socom pressed against his forehead.

Now that he was close to her he could finally get a good look at her: she was yet again another woman with snow white hair, a strange trend with the women he'd met recently, with eyes bluer than the waters of Lake Louise that complimented her beautiful features and buxom frame.

She wore a black jacket, fingerless woolen gloves and black pants, obviously not dressed in her work uniform, and she glared at the costumed hero with distaste.

"You must be Spider-Man?" she asked.

"Actually there's a few silent characters and accents in it, it's pronounced as 'Spider-Man'll-Be-Taking-His-Leave-Now" he said, giving her the thumbs up before attempting to take a step back only to have her grab hold of his chest and jam the gun the underside of his jaw.

"If you make one move that I don't like, you make a wrong step or breathe when I don't want you to, you're dead" she snarled.

"Christ... now I know what it's like to work with Edward Norton" Spider-Man said, the woman walking around him and placing the gun at the back of his skull before bringing her wrist up to her mouth, speaking into a communicator on a bracelet.

"Smythe, we've got a little visitor here for you" she said with a smirk before jabbing Spider-Man in the back of the head with the gun to get him to move "Through the door and if you try anything you'll be dead before you even hear the gunshot"

"You know... I don't have a joke for that" Spider-Man said, sighing loudly before moving through the automatic door and beholding the enormous figure that was the real-life version of Metal Gear Ray.

"Whoa" he said, examining the, horrifyingly complete, WMD-on-legs.

"So?" Smythe's voice called from the side of the room, Spider-Man turning his head to see the tall man wearing a black trench coat and his usual thin glasses, looking at him with a smug expression. "You're the sneaky, stealing, slithering little python that snuck into my company and blew the whistle on me?"

"Dude, gimme a sec while I compile a list of blowjob jokes to go with that" Spider-Man said, wiggling his fingers in the air as he held them above his head "Alright, good to go"

"He likes to talk doesn't he?" the woman asked.

"Yes" he answered.

"Have I introduced you two yet?" Alistair asked "Spider-Man, this is Alexis Winters, the legendary sniper also known as the White Reaper, quite a sight to behold is she not?"

"Eh" Spider-Man shrugged "The last white-haired chick I met had bigger boobs, but hers are still great"

"What a gentleman" she spat, walking around him with the gun pressed against his skull.

"Thank you" Spider-Man giggled "Sempai noticed me"

"Can I shoot him yet?" she asked.

"Not yet, old Smizzle here still needs to monologue about his evil plan before he tries, and fails, to kill me" Spider-Man said, his eyes catching a glimpse of a certain red head of hair "So Tasha... shoot"

"Tasha?" Smythe asked in a confused tone "Who are you talking t-"

This sentence was interrupted by Smythe receiving a bullet wound to the shoulder, dropping down to the ground in agony with a loud roar or pain before Alexis turned the gun to where the shot had come from only to get her own solid S.H.I.E.L.D brand boot to the mouth from Widow.

"Kid!" she yelled, dropping down to the floor and delivering an uppercut to Alexis's stomach "Take care of the Gear!"

"Right!" Spider-Man nodded, moving towards Ray only to have his Spider-Sense go off and a strangely powerful hand grab hold of his ankle and tear him from the ground, throwing him into the wall.

He slammed into the metallic surface, denting it as he dropped down onto his front, looking up to see Smythe in a strange, Iron Man-esque exoskeleton, getting to his feet and cracking his knuckles.

"Not so fast Snake" he growled "You aren't touching Ray"

"We'll see about that Smythe" Spider-Man chuckled, settling into a fighting stance and moving towards Smythe, ready for a hard fight.

That Feeling of-

Smythe opened the fight with a powerful lunge, Spider-Man dipping down low with a bend of his right knee and slamming an uppercut into Smythe's left side, the attack sending the genius doctor spinning off to the side, the heaviness of the exoskeleton making it impossible for him to stay on his feet.

While Spider-Man seemingly waltzed through his fight with Smythe, Widow and Alexis were engaged in one of the most heated battles he'd never seen.

"You're good with a gun girl-" Widow said, delivering three lashing kicks to Alexis's knee, side and neck, each one being blocked by the side of her arm only to have her grab the last one and attempt to twist Widow's leg over.

Widow moved with the turn, flipping over and kicking Alexis in the back of the head, causing her to let go of Widow's foot.

"But you don't hold a candle to me in combat" Widow snarled, landing on her hands before flipping over forward, turning around to catch a swing from Alexis by the wrist, yanking her forward and bringing her knee up into stomach.

This attack however was caught by Alexis crossing her arms in a X pattern over her stomach before turning her hands over, grabbing the underside of Widow's thigh and lifting it straight up, driving her own knee directly into Widow's crotch.

A pained yell came from Widow that was silenced and deafened by the sound of her nose breaking as Alexis drove her forehead into it, blood splattering down her face and onto the once-clear forehead of the pale woman.

The two backed away from each other, Widow now on the receiving end of the fight as they squared off and assumed fighting stances once more.

"We'll see about that Romanov" Alexis growled, cracking her knuckles before running at Widow.

She opened the second bout with  a leaping kick, this being caught by Widow's gloved hands, the Russian elite turning around and attempting to throw the shorter woman only to have her bend her leg in and wrap her other leg around her throat, landing several powerful punches to her eyes in face before Widow released her, the white warrior rounding off before standing on her feet.

"What's the matter Widow?" she taunted playfully "Slowing down in your old age?"

Widow spat a globule of blood from her mouth before wiping away the residue, standing up straight again and growling.

"What the hell have you been doing for the best few years?" she asked angrily "You've never been this good of a fighter"

"Remember Shang Chi?" she asked with a smug grin "He's always eager to help a paying student"

Widow ended the conversation there, playing this fight smarter from that point on and not rushing into things.

She approached slowly this time, keeping her hands at the ready and her feet equal distance apart as she eyed up Alexis, the white-haired woman having a hand placed on her cocked hips with a smug, blowing a kiss at Widow before an interruption came that neither of them expected.

Alexis spotted it first, her eyes wide with horror in the second it took for Smythe's battered body to fly towards her, knocking them both off their feet and into a heap on the floor.

"Bullseye!" Spider-Man yelled, landing in a low crouch next to Widow.

He looked at her, then back to the others before quickly double-taking, standing up straight and looking at her.

"You're hurt" he stated, placing a hand on her shoulder.

"I noticed, does the blood go well with my hair?" she asked with a grin.

"It looks delightful my darling" Spider-Man nodded, breathing a sigh of relief "I can see you on the cover of-"

Spider-Man was interrupted by his Spider-Sense blaring, warning him of an immediate danger behind him.

He didn't try to turn around to look, he merely bent his legs and threw himself down to the floor, the sound of a gunshot blaring for longer than a normal human should be able to hear before the bullet whizzed right over him.

He pushed himself up and everything sped up again, his arm lashing around and webbing the gun away from Smythe's hand, grabbing it and pulling it apart.

"Oh, nice going jackass, why didn't you let me take the shot?!" Alexis demanded before Spider-Man webbed her mouth shut.

"Ah, ah, don't swear" he said with a wag of his finger "It's very unbecoming of a lady"

"Right, are we done here?" Widow asked, pressing a finger to her ear and Codec calling Fury "Sir, we've secured the Gear model as well as arrested apprehended Smythe"

"I wouldn't be so sure" Smythe growled, hitting a button on a watch he wore and pretty much brought on the end times.

There was a loud whirring noise before Ray started to move behind them, the entire ship shaking as the colossal beast unfolded its wing-like blade compartments and opened it's mouth, releasing it's signature metallic-screeching noise.

"What!?" Widow demanded, diving out of the way of one of the enormous chains that fell as Ray tore itself loose "I thought this thing needed a pilot?"

"It does..." Spider-Man said before his mind flashed back to the plans he'd read "But the other, smaller Ray models are unmanned remember... they work on either A.I or remote-controlled commands... it's only the original, biggest Ray that would need to be piloted"

"Are you trying to tell me that-"

"This one isn't the real Metal Gear Ray!" Spider-Man yelled, Ray's swords emerging from their hidden compartments and puncturing the ship's hull, the freezing salt water now beginning to pour into the lower bowels of the vessel.

"Smythe, control that thing!" Alexis yelled only to be punched in the face by the mad scientist, knocking her unconscious.

Spider-Man grabbed for Smythe only to be swatted aside, the taller man hitting another button on his wrist before calling up to the Gear.

"Collect me!" he yelled, the Gear bending down and opening his mouth, revealing that it did indeed have a cockpit.

Smythe leaped into the machine, it closing and airlocking the cockpit before Smythe entered another command, this time for the ship, that bolted and deadlocked the doors, leaving all three of them trapped down there.

"Smythe!" Spider-Man bellowed, leaping up at the Gear's head and beginning to pound fiercely on the armour but to no avail.

"Sorry to have to part so suddenly, but your little disruption has pushed my plan along further than I wanted it to be" Smythe's voice said from the Gear's hidden speakers.

It shook its head, it's armour being a non-stick material, and Spider-Man was thrown the twenty feet down to the floor, landing on his hands and dropping down low, Ray cutting through an enormous parts of the ship that caused more salt water to pour in as well as bringing the roof down between Spider-Man and the Black Widow.

"Kid!" Widow yelled, wading through the now waist high waters and banging on the metal shelf "Kid!"

There was no response and the room was filling up fast, Spider-Man, Alexis and Ray were all still on that side of the ship and Widow knew the second Ray made its escape the tanker was going down.

"Smythe!" Spider-Man roared again, throwing several barrels at the Gear in hopes it would do something "You're not getting away!"

"Too late!" Smythe's voice roared "I'm taking you down Snake, along with this tanker!"

Widow called Fury again, issuing a command.

"Sir, get Carol down here now!" she bellowed She's got two minutes to get here before we all fucking drown!"

There was another metallic roar from Ray before he jumped through the hull, tearing the ship in two and the water pushed down on them all, the ship sinking to the bottom of the Hudson with them all trapped inside.

Rescue Operation

Ms Marvel broke the surface of the water in an explosive manner, diving deep below the waves and down to the wreckage of the ship, tearing at the green metal and making her way into the cargo bay.

Throwing bright energy balls across the floor of the Hudson to illuminate her surroundings as she went she searched desperately for the Black Widow and Spider-Man, knowing that she had less than a minute before they drowned.

"Come on, come on!" she thought to herself, powering through the water at great speeds inside the cargo.

She came to a brief halt as she felt vibrations going through the water, her eyes moving to the source and seeing a crumpled metal wall, covering something up.

Ms Marvel jetted down to it, knocking on the wall before receiving a knock in response.

She tore away the wall and saw Black Widow, having been trapped in a small air pocket thanks to being pinned by the wall in .a cranny in the ship, grabbing hold of her and considering going at full speed but wanting to avoid Widow dying from pulmonary embolism she knew she needed to ascend slower.

This wasted more time, for both of them as well as Spider-Man, and this was something she couldn't afford to do.

Without a word, she dropped Widow back into the water with one gesture: a pointed finger to the shore before diving back down into the icy water, throwing more energy spheres to light her way.

"Come on kid, where are you?" she thought, her heart rate accelerating as she began to panic, now stretching into the third minute of the two being submerged she knew that if she didn't find him soon he was as good as dead.

"Please have gotten the powers of a diving bell spider" she thought frantically, beginning to consider evaporating all of the water in the Hudson before remembering that it would cook Spider-Man like a piece of Spider-Linguine.

"No, no, no!" she mentally roared, grinding her teeth in frustration "Where are you!?"

Then: Hope.

A glimmer in the water caused by her energy spheres illuminated a red and blue clad figure, floating limply through the water.

"There you are!"

She blasted through the water, not being nearly as deep as she had been when retrieving Widow, this allowing her to move faster without fear of Spider-Man's oxygenated bloodstream rupturing his veins on the rapid ascent, and she smashed through the surface with the unconscious teenager in her arms.

Pulling his mask off his face and holding him flat in her arms on his stomach, she tried her best to get him to vomit up the water he'd no doubt swallowed.

"Come on, breathe" she said before deciding it wasn't going to be enough.

She flew over to the bank of the Hudson and set him down on his back, wasting no time before clamping her mouth to his and breathing as hard as she could, watching his chest expand before removing her mouth, the air leaving his lungs with no result, she tried it again and once again received nothing.

The third time she tried it she had to try something different.

Something that would force the water of out his lungs for sure.

But it wasn't going to be easy.

"Sorry Peter" she said, pressing her hand lightly on his chest, taking a deep breath herself before applying pressure, the loud snapping sound being heard as his she broke his sternum, allowing her to directly apply pressure to his lungs.

She then sat him up and moved behind him, pressing both hands onto his chest and squeezing his body against hers, the teen vomiting up a large amount of salt water before his head went limp.

A smile broke on her face as she lay him back down, performing mouth to mouth again to make sure his lungs were functioning on their own and, surely enough, after several repeats Spider-Man regained consciousness and began coughing loudly, Ms Marvel collapsing onto her backside next to him and breathing a sigh of relief.

Spider-Man attempted to move only to hiss in agony, clutching at his chest.

Ms Marvel moved quickly, taking hold of both of his hands and placing them down by his sides.

"Peter, Peter, don't try to move" she said in a comforting manner "You're injured, badly"

"Y-Yeah I... ugh" he said, screwing his eyes shut as the pain was too much for him to finish the joke.

"Relax..." she said, moving around and sitting just above his head on the shore, placing her hands to his head and closing her eyes "I'm going to drain a little bit of energy from you until you become unconscious okay? It'll stop the pain, I promise"

"Y-You sure?" he wheezed.

"Of course" she said with a kind and gentle smile "Do you trust me?"

"I... yeah, I do" he responded.

"Good, now close your eyes and don't move, you'll be out before you know it" Ms Marvel whispered, Peter doing as she said before she used her energy absorption powers to drain him to unconsciousness, the pained expression dropping from his face before a relieved one appeared on her own.

It was at this point Black Widow came sprinting over, skidding onto her knees and looking at Peter with a panicked expression.

"How is he?" she asked frantically "Is he still with us? How bad is he hurt?"

"A few cuts, bruises and breaks, nothing he can't heal from naturally" she said in a calming tone "Don't worry, he's gonna be fine"

"That's a relief" Widow nodded "Fury'd kill me if I let him die before he'd even had his initiation"

"Speaking of which, how'd the mission go?" Ms Marvel asked before catching herself "I mean before it all went to shit, that is"

"We found out a good piece of information... and by that I mean a horrible one" Widow sighed "The Gear they were shipping into New York isn't the main model Gear we thought it was, it was one of the smaller, unmanned Gears that can be piloted but mostly run off their own A.I, and what's worse is that we don't know where the main Gear is, or if it's even in the country"

"I'm guessing that the ship didn't go down from an iceberg?" Ms Marvel asked, looking at the spot where the ship used to be.

"No, and I think everybody on that thing died, including our old friend the White Reaper" Widow added.

"Knowing her, she probably found a way out of that alive" Ms Marvel scoffed "Nobody's been able to put that bitch down so far and she's faced much worse than a sinking ship"

"Too true" Widow nodded "Right, I'll call Fury to get us an extraction, you can sit here and keep the kid company if you want?"

"With pleasure" Ms Marvel nodded.

Widow raised an eye at this response and Ms Marvel narrowed hers.

"I didn't mean it like that and you know it" she growled.

"Hey, I'm not judging" the red head said, standing up and putting a finger to her ear "Just make sure you two do it safely when nobody's around you little sex pest"

"You do know I could launch you to the moon with my foot right now, don't you?" she asked irritably.

"I know" Widow said "But I'd like you to not"

"Why?" she responded "Afraid to die?"

"Nope, because then you'll be left on your own with an unconscious and injured fifteen year old boy to play with" Widow said with a smirk.

"I hate you"

"I know dear"

Bedside Manner

Peter’s sleep was stirred by a loud shattering noise from beside him, followed by a quiet hiss of stress from another person.

He opened his eyes, seeing the cold steel ceiling above him, and turned his head after gathering his surroundings to see the large backside of Ms. Marvel, bent over as she tried to pick up the pieces of a shattered mug that had spilled its contents of coffee all over the floor.

“Not gonna lie-” Peter said with a grin, “I could get used to waking up like this every morning.”

“Good to see that drowning didn’t damage your brain,” Ms. Marvel chuckled, turning her head and smiling at him before standing straight, thumping her back gently before massaging out a small knot in her muscle.

“Seriously though…” Peter said, sitting up and leaning against the large pillow he had, “I didn’t think white girls had it in their genetics to have an ass that big.”

“Well… it might have something to do with the genetic manipulation from the Kree,” she suggested, sitting down on the bed next to him, crossing her leg over her knee and leaning back on her hands.  “Who knows, it might even be the source of my power?”

Peter laughed at the joke before realizing he didn’t know what the Kree were.

So he asked.

“The Kree is an alien race that, before they came to Earth, was a militant race of nomads that went from planet to planet, recruiting the strongest warriors they could find and, once they’d found them, manipulating their genetic code to make them into Kree soldiers,” Carol explained, looking up at a burn mark on the ceiling.

“You said ‘before’... what happened to them?” Peter asked, resting his hands on his knees as he sat up.

“We destroyed them with the help of one of their own, Mar-Vell,” Carol said, a solemn look blooming on her face.

“Mar-Vell?” Peter asked with a raised eyebrow.

“Yeah, his superhero name was Captain Marvel.  He was the one that found me and gave me my powers before I was able to convince him to help us fight off the Kree.  When he agreed to it, we worked together and the people we fought called me ‘Ms. Mar-Vell’ as a derogatory term… it just stuck after that”

“So how did you fight them off?” Peter asked.

“Independence Day style,” Carol said, a small smile coming back onto her face.

“You mean you came up with a bullshit plan to infect a super-advanced alien supercomputer with a human-made virus that shouldn’t’ve been able to infect the computer because it most likely wasn’t running on Windows Ninety-Five? Or any human programming for that matter?” Peter asked.

“Yeah, something like that” Carol nodded with a grin.

“Jesus, that movie sucked,” Peter said, his inner Nostalgia Critic breaking through his Parker-ness.  “Same with Godzilla and Stargate… Roland Emmerich’s a shit director”

“I can understand Stargate and Godzilla but… you didn’t like Independence Day?” she asked “Why not?”

“Two reasons: One, for the plot point I just explained and two, it was a rehash of the first two Emmerich disaster movies: The white, socially awkward nerdy scientist detects an alien threat and warns people about it.  Nobody listens to him because they’re assholes and then he comes in at the last minute to save the day by doing the thing people said wouldn’t work,” Peter explained.

“I’m guessing you’re not good to sit next to at the movies, are you?” she asked with a smirk.

“Hey, come along with me the next time I go for one and I’ll show you exactly how much fun I am at the movies,” Peter chuckled.

“I think I might take you up on that,” Carol said.  “But first, we’ve gotta take care of the Gear.”

“Ah, yes,” Peter nodded.  “Somehow, I’d completely forgotten about that.”

“Widow’s in with Fury and now briefing him on what you guys learned in there,” Carol said.  “After the tanker went down there was quite a lot of public interest with Mayor Maer, giving a statement she’d been told to about the ship experiencing electrical problems that lead to an atmosphere decompression in the lower decks that caused the ship’s hull to buckle and tear.”

“You know something?” Peter asked with a grin “I quite enjoy being part of the secret service.  I get to know what’s behind all the lies.”

“Not at your security clearance you’re not,” Carol chuckled, patting him on the leg before getting off the bed, Peter’s eyes once again locking onto her rear.

“Does that thing ever ride up at any point?” he asked.

“Like you wouldn’t believe,” Carol sighed.  “I had an older one that acted as more of a leotard that covered my butt instead of it being a G-String like it is now.”

“Then why don’t you wear that one?” Peter asked.

“I felt like it was too similar to the old Captain Marvel outfit Mar-Vell used to wear,” Carol shrugged “I liked this one because it was more original.”

“Well… I hate to piss on your parade but, uh, that one’s pretty much a genderbent version of Black Adam’s costume,” Peter said with a raised finger.

“Who?” Carol asked, turning around with a cocked eyebrow.

“Black Adam… he’s one of the… other Captain Marvel’s bad guys,” Peter answered.

“What d’you mean the other Captain Marvel?” she asked.

“Well… DC comics created a character in the nineteen-forties called Billy Batson, who was like an eleven year old boy who met a wizard named Shazam, who granted him these magical powers so that every time he shouted the name ‘Shazam’, he would turn into the superhero known as Captain Marvel,” Peter began, talking with his hands as he spoke.  “But the thing is, DC actually copyrighted the name ‘Shazam’ in reference to the character but forgot to copyright ‘Captain Marvel’, and if they had then, he’d be getting sued for unlicensed use of a copyrighted character.”

Carol stood there speechless for several seconds, her mouth agape as she tried her hardest to scramble together a sentence before giving up on the action entirely, pressing her rouged lips together and making a popping sound before looking down at her costume.

“And who did you say Black Adam was again?”

“Oh, he’s Captain Marvel’s archnemesis, big scary and kind of racially-ambiguous villain who has a black costume with a yellow lightning bolt down the chest and a yellow sash tied at his waist.

Carol gently lifted her red sash and looked at it with pursed lips.

“Maybe… maybe I should switch back to the old one?” she suggested.

“Yeah, before DC slams you up the butt with a cease and desist warning for copyright infringement,” Peter said.  “What does the other one look like?”

“It’s similar to this one in terms of shape except it’s red on the body and the hips sections as well as the neck and shoulders are black.  It had black gloved-sleeves instead of just long gloves.  And instead of a lightning bolt, it had a bright star on the chest.  Oh, and it had this scarf-thing, two long strips of cloth that came off the back of the neck.”

“What about the boots?” Peter asked.

“Don’t tell anybody, but I used the same boots for both outfits,” she said in a hushed tone.

Blasphemous,” Peter said in a shocked tone, putting a hand to his mouth.

“I know,” she nodded.  “Now, you ready to go and see Fury to learn what our next move is?”

“I’m guessing it’s to wait for the Big Shell to be set up so we can go and stop Arsenal Gear?” Peter threw out with a wave of his hand.

“Arsenal Gear?” Carol asked “Is that another Gear model?”

“Oh yeah, it’s up there in terms of dangerous with Metal Gear D, Metal Gear ZEKE, Metal Gear Rex, the TX-55 Metal Gear, the Shagohod, the Intercontinental Ballistic Metal Gear, Outer Haven, Metal Gear EXCELSUS and the D-Walker,” Peter said, counting each model of Metal Gear on his fingers.

Carol stared at him with a horrified look on her face, complete disbelief taking over as she began to pray that they weren’t building all of the models Peter just mentioned.

“You… you said that these things came from a video game right?” she asked “Who was it that beat them and how did they do it?”

“Well…” Peter began, “different people have taken down the Metal Gears in different games.  Canonically, the first person to take down a Metal Gear model, which was the Shagohod, so technically it wasn’t a Gear.  It was Big Boss, known at that time as Naked Snake.  The other people to destroy the Gears were Solid Snake and Raiden.”

“W… Solid Snake?” Carol asked in a confused manner “Who was that?”

“Solid Snake was one of the sons of Big Boss created in the Les Enfants Terribles project in the nineteen-seventies by Major Zero as a way of keeping the ultimate soldier American.  He was born alongside his younger brother Liquid Snake, the two being the only two surviving embryos from the original eight that were fertilized in EVA’s womb, the other six being terminated to promote the healthy growth of the other two, and the two of them ended up fighting on Shadow Moses when Liquid took over the testing ground where the Armstech president and the DARPA chief were field testing the newest model of Metal Gear, Metal Gear Rex, where Snake was able to overpower Liquid in a fistfight and Liquid was killed by the FOXDIE virus that was implanted in Snake by Naomi Hunter who wanted revenge on Snake for killing her ‘brother’ Grey Fox when the two fought against each other in Zanzibarland when Big Boss staged a military coup using the Militaires Sans Frontieres, his soldiers without borders and-”

“Peter, Peter-” Carol interrupted, placing two fingers to her temple and breathing loudly.  “Stop.  I physically cannot process any more information than that without my head exploding.”

“Right,” Peter grinned.  “Point taken… can we go see Fury now?”

“Yes, but on the way there, I think we need to stop off at the med bay and acquire some ibuprofen,” Carol said.

“For your head I’m guessing?” Peter asked with a raised eyebrow.

“Please, nobody needs to be guessing right now,” she said, rubbing her eyes with her hands.  “It only leads to more headaches.”

“Fair enough,” Peter laughed, getting up off the bed and rolling his shoulders, his sternum now fully repaired.  “By the way, what happened to my chest?”

“Yeah, the only way to help you cough up the water you swallowed after you nearly drowned, I had to break your sternum to directly compress your lungs and squeeze the water out,” she explained.  “Sorry.”

“Right, as long as you’re sure it was necessary to smash my ribcage,” Peter said.

“I’ll let you do the same if you want?” Carol offered.

“Nah, out of all of the things you’ve got, your sternum isn’t the one thing I’d like to smash” Peter said, the look on his face giving away he was waiting for a reaction.

Carol raised a blonde eyebrow at the teenager as she crossed her arms, tapping her foot on the floor as the seconds ticked by.

“Very mature,” she commented.

“Thank you,” he chuckled.  “I try.”

An Interesting Proposition

Peter was sat down next to Carol, the aforementioned blonde woman now occupying her time trying to stack drink coasters due to sheer boredom on behalf of having to wait for the S.H.I.E.L.D lower-downs to dig up the files on the shipments of possible Ray units into the country.

Peter turned to Carol with a questioning glance before she justified her actions with a well-worded sentence.

“Shut it,” she began. “I’m bored.”

“Fair enough,” Peter said with a shrug, turning his head to look at Natasha who was currently reading through something on a S.H.I.E.L.D brand tablet.

“Hey, Widow?” Peter called over to her.

“Listening,” she answered.

“What happened to Cassie?” he asked her.

“Your phone was wrecked when the tanker went down,” she explained.  “Luckily, we were able to salvage the software Cassie operates on from the hard drive.  Your numbers and texts, however, weren’t so lucky.  We managed to get you a new phone, though.”

“No expense spared, I’m guessing?” Peter grinned.

“But of course,” Widow nodded, sliding a Nokia 3310 over the table at him.

Peter stared at the small, blue phone for a moment, his eyes scanning every lack of curve on the blocky bastard before throwing his eyes back up to Widow with the fires of hell burning in them.

“Right,” he announced.  “If you’re seriously giving me the phone for the reason I think you are, then you could’ve just written ‘Fuck You’ on a piece of paper and it would’ve cost less.”

“It was twenty bucks, Peter,” Widow said, dragging a finger down the tablet to scroll back up to something she’d missed. “I’m a multi-millionaire.”

“That-” Peter began before catching himself.  “What, seriously?”

“Oh yeah,” Carol interjected.  “S.H.I.E.L.D pays all of their employees an amazing salary as well as yearly bonuses based on work completion and ethic, as well as free dental care.  They also throw in leave three times a year and paid sick leave as well.”

“What are their starting rates?” Peter asked, now genuinely interested in the agency.  “Vacations? Company bonuses?”

“For interns?” Widow said.  “There aren’t any.  You have to be over eighteen to be officially employed and need to have at least a year of service before they start offering bonuses.”

“That doesn’t answer the question,” Peter stated.  “If I were to join, how much would I get as a base salary?”

“Well, that depends,” Widow said, putting the tablet down and looking up at Peter.  “Like most companies there are different roles that different people fill in.  You could get a job as a data analyst or you could clean up the bathrooms.”

“And having to pledge allegiance and be willing to be monitored twenty four seven just to clean out a stall is kind of a hefty price,” Carol added.

“Too true,” Widow agreed.  “Working for S.H.I.E.L.D removes any sort of privacy from day-to-day life.”

“Wait, how does it?” Peter asked.

“Well,” Carol started, “S.H.I.E.L.D keeps tabs on everyone it employs, whether you’re sweeping the floors or carrying around a briefcase that contains documents could destroy the U.S. economy through scandals and raw deals doesn’t matter.  They’re always watching to make sure you don’t go rogue.”

“And what happens if you do go rogue?” Peter asked.

“They usually send a team to take you out, usually headed by Coulson,” Widow said with a wave of her hand.

“Have I met him yet?” Peter inquired.

“No, he’s off somewhere else doing something less cool than what we are,” Widow answered with a shrug before standing up.  “Anyone want coffee?”

“Sure, two sugars and extra caffeine,” Carol said with a nod.

Please,” Widow corrected.

Carol responded by sticking her middle finger up at Widow, who merely turned to Peter and asked his choice.

“What about you, small-fry?”

“I’m good thanks.  Can I get a diet coke please?”

“Is Pepsi okay?”

“Die in a hole?”

“Right, I’ll get right on that,” Widow chuckled, moving her chair back and walking out of the briefing room, a young girl with black hair walking past her.

“Hey Jess, just be warned that the love of your life is in here,” Widow said with a smirk, patting the smaller girl on the shoulder as she walked past.

“I’ve already told you-” Jessica began before being cut off.

“Whatever, just make sure I get an invite to the wedding!” Widow called from down the hall, giving the black-haired girl a thumbs up before disappearing around the corner.

The green-eyed agent sighed angrily, storming around the corner before her eyes locked onto Peter, freezing instantly.

“Hi Jess,” Carol said with a wave.  “What d’you need?”

“I, uh, I’m looking for Director Fury?” she asked, snapping back to reality and looking at Carol “I’d like to talk to him about when he’s going to let me take the Holo-Exam.”

“Well he’s not here at the moment,” Carol said before pulling out a chair on her right side.  “You can take a seat and wait for him if you want?”

“Uhhh…” Jessica said, scratching the back of her head nervously before shrugging.  “Yeah, okay.”

Peter recognized the voice but wasn’t too eager to talk to her after their last encounter, where he’d been kind of a prick, and figured he’d either do the masculine thing of neglecting to mention it and start again or to do the right thing and apologize.

“So…” Jessica began.  “What’re you guys doing here?”

“We’re currently waiting for an update on Fury’s plan to take care of Smythe’s plan,” Carol said with a sideways glance at Jessica.

“Is… is that a sly way of telling me I’m not allowed to know?” Jessica asked.

“Yes it is, my friend,” Carol smiled, patting the shorter girl on the head.

“Great,” she sighed, resting her arms on the table and then resting her head on her arms.  “I can’t wait until I pass that Holo-Exam, then I’ll get to know things.”

Peter at this point stood up out of his chair, the two girls taking notice of this, Jessica’s eyes widening as he walked over to her and held out his hand.

“Hey, look…” he began.  “Before I start crying like an emasculated little boy because of the fact that I have to admit I’m in the wrong, I’d like to say that I’m sorry about how I acted the first time we met and I wanna start again, if you don’t mind?”

Jessica stared at his hand for a long second, her eyes moving over to Carol, the older woman giving a supportive nod, before Jessica took his hand and shook it with a smile.

“Peter Parker,” Peter said.

“Jessica Drew,” Jessica responded.  “It’s nice to meet you.”

“You too, Jessica,” Peter grinned.

“Right!” came Fury’s voice from the doorway, the tall man hurrying into the room with several tablets in his arms, sliding them across the table to each in attendance, his eye landing on Jessica before raising an eyebrow.

“Ms. Drew?” he asked.

“Right, leaving,” she nodded, getting up out of her chair and heading out of the room and, once out of sight, silently squeeing happily before hurrying off down the corridor.

“Anyway,” Fury began, “after Stark’s brilliant deconstruction and analyzation of Ray’s internal wiring and hardware, we’ve managed to find its weakness, but it’s not an easy one to exploit.”

“Please tell me it’s stinger missiles?” Peter asked.  “It’s usually stinger missiles.”

“Sadly no, we’ve managed to find out, for the unmanned Rays that is, that its central A.I. core, which doubles as its remote control point, is located in its head, pretty much its brain,” Fury continued.  “Now the only way to get to the brain is through a small USB port in the back of its mouth.”

“Seems like quite a glaring weak point if I’m honest,” Carol said, drumming her fingers on the table.

“And if I’m honest Carol, I’d like to see a normal man plug a USB stick into the mouth of a twenty-foot tall, nuclear-equipped, walking tank armed to the teeth with machine guns, flares, plasma beams, and heat-seeking missiles,” Fury said.

“Point taken,” Carol nodded.  “Continue.”

“So the plan we’ve come up with is to get a virus into Ray’s system that’ll shut down the A.I. or block out the controller’s access to the machine and allow us to seize it,” Fury said.

“Whoa, whoa… seize it?” Peter demanded.  “We’re not destroying it?”

“Of course not,” Fury said with a pointed finger.  “This thing could be the ultimate weapon to benefit the U.S.’s defenses and would enable us to enter combat zones and destroy the enemy swiftly and easily.  Of course, we’d be removing the nuclear weapons from the Rays in case they were captured or one of the pilots went rogue.”

“That-” Peter began with his own pointed finger before falling silent, thinking it over for several seconds before giving a different response.  “Well… the real danger with the Gears was their nuclear capabilities… and I suppose the only difference between a combat-enabled Ray and an F-22 fighter jet is that Ray would be slower… and would walk.”

“See?” Fury asked.  “Without their nuclear weapons Ray is pretty much a tank that stands on legs, equipped with a cannon and machine guns, much like any standard issue Sherman or Tiger tank kid.  There’s nothing to worry about.”

“Well… I’m guessing the cost is a big problem?” Peter offered.  “Because with each Ray model using vibranium in it’s armour, the U.S isn’t exactly gonna be able to roll these things off the production line as quickly as they did the Shermans, aren’t they?

“And that only makes it better, doesn’t it?” Fury asked.

“Yeah… I guess it does,” Peter nodded. “Good talk, Fury.”

“You too, Parker,” Fury chuckled before continuing.  “As I was saying, Ray has its port in the back of it’s mouth, and in order to get to it, we’re gonna need each individual Avenger to pitch in.”

“Even me?” Peter asked.

“Yes, even you kid,” Fury nodded.  “We’re gonna use you as armoured bait.”

“Okay, two things?” Peter suggested.  “What the fuck do you mean bait and what the fuck do you mean armoured?”

“I can answer that one,” Stark said, walking into the room with a briefcase in his hand.  “What d’you think about the Iron Spider?”

“I think I’m interested is what I think,” Peter said, leaning back in his chair with a grin. “Continue?”

Hardware Upgrade

“So kid,” Tony said, sliding the tablet across the table to Peter to allow him to look at the design of the so-called ‘Iron Spider’ “What d’you think?”

Peter stared at the design for a long second, taking in the retractable three leg-esque objects, the enormous golden spider moniker and the flashy-yet-plain design Stark had created.

“What do I think?” Peter asked, looking up at Stark “I think the better question is what do I feel? And right now I feel fucking insulted that you’d even think I’d wear something as disgusting as this abomination.”

“I had a feeling you’d say that.” Stark chuckled, getting up out of his chair and walking over to the cases that contained his own models of Iron Man suits before stopping at a blacked out one with a spider-symbol projected onto it.

Peter’s eyebrow raised in curiosity as Stark placed a hand on a scanner mounted on the wall next to the case and entered a code, refraining from pressing a button on the pad before Peter made his way over to it.

“C’mon, take a look.” Stark said with a gesture.

Peter nodded, getting up and walking over to the case where Stark hit the button and unveiled something much better.

The biggest improvement was that this suit actually looked like armour and not a tacky, plastic halloween costume.

This suit was a grey-and-black weapon with a series of intersecting plates covering the body, each plate mimicking a certain muscle and being a slate black. Thick shoulder plates, visibly screwed on by triangular-patterned bolts

The next thing to catch his eye were the gauntlets, they were thick and powerful looking weapons with protruding yet blunt knuckles that seemed designed to be more painful and to leave a larger mark, same being said with the thick boots made of the same metal, all of the suit being polished to a shine.

The underlayer of the suit was a cold grey, visible through the joints of the suit and appeared to be made of the same material Stark’s thermal gear was made of, sure to have some bonus to it, Peter guessed.

The two best things about the suit, in Peter’s opinion, were the mask-no, the helmet, and the spider-symbol.

The helmet itself was styled after the tight-fitting appearance of his regular mask but was instead a completely black, sleek piece of what looked like some kind of glass, fitted with the back being the same material as the armour plates, several pieces of hardware behind the area his ears would be to do God-knows-what.

Then came the symbol, the steel grey, angular spider on the armour plates had its bottom four legs go around the lower waist of the armour and seemingly connect with the symbol on the back, something he’d originally wanted to try with his own costume but never found a way to do successfully.

“So?” Tony asked. “How about this one?”

“In all honesty, this one kicks the shit out of the other one.” Peter grinned. “What’s this thing boasting?”

“Improvements, some topping my own armour,” Stark said. “I know you move a lot more than I do in my armour, in different ways too, so instead of going with the more stocky and heavier armour I designed a more flexible and less-restrictive type of power armour, and this is what I came up with.”

“But I’m guessing it's not made of concentrated vibranium though?” Peter asked.

“No it is not, instead it’s a tri-weave combat chassis consisting of both an outer and inner titanium-dipped tri-weave fiber mesh with MR-fluid liquid body armour sandwiched in between.” Stark explained.

“MR fluid?” Peter asked with a raised eyebrow.

“It’s shortened from magnetorheological fluid, it’s a type of carrier fluid that, in a magnetic field, can alter its viscosity and ultimately become a viscoelastic solid.” Stark continued.

“So that means it can change how thick or thin it is depending on the strength of the electromagnetic field it’s exposed to, right?” Peter questioned.

“Exactly, and the electromagnetic field of this particular suit is controlled by the sensors implanted all over the armour that detects pressure and analyzes impact before altering the field to compensate.” Stark nodded.

“Wait, you mean the thing doesn’t run on piezomagnetism to strengthen itself?” Peter asked.

“No, it can be kind of unreliable when being deployed in the field and mostly relies on deformation for it to work, something we don’t want the armour to do, and with piezomagnetism as well as piezoelectric being observed in mostly crystals, and only then antiferromagnetic ones which rely on the spinning of electrons to alter their fields, I felt that having an electronic sensor and control unit would be much more reliable than a natural force.”

“That’s pretty clever, so what’s the system that controls and regulates the electromagnetic field in my armour?” Peter asked.

“Cassie will be, we salvaged her from your phone and she’s ready to be downloaded into your new armour’s mainframe.” Stark answered.

“Hang on a second, you said the armour was tri-weave, you mentioned two layers, what was the third?” Peter asked with a raised hand.

“The third layer is the fiber mesh in between that, when used in tandem with the electrmagnetic field manipulation and the MR fluid allows the armour to absorb a greater amount of shock, which is another name for a strong force, and with the ever-present third law from our friend Newton, allows the suit to not only take more damage before breaking but also to allow much more vicious and powerful counterattacks using the transfer of the kinetic energy the tri-weave allows.” Stark finished.

“That’s… that’s pretty fucking awesome.” Peter said. “And the colour looks great too”

“And d’you wanna know something cooler?” Stark asked with a grin.

“Shoot.” Peter nodded.

“The eyes light up.” he responded “Bright blue.”

“That’s fucking dope.” Peter beamed “Can I try it on?”

“Yeah, we want you to take it for a test drive before you use it against Ray.” Stark answered “I’ll take it down, take it apart and let you put it on.”

“Won’t I need help with that?” Peter asked.

“Nope, you just put the different parts on and it does the rest for you.” Stark answered.

“It’s like Christmas came early.” Peter chuckled, visibly shaking with excitement.

“One more thing, I’m gonna need your usual costume to finish off a project I’m working on.” Stark said “So when you get changed, just leave it over there.”

“What d’you need it for?” Peter asked.

“To make it more convenient for you.” Stark answered, walking back over to a laptop on the table and beginning to work on something “Now, get suited up.”

“Yes sir.” Peter said.


Peter watched with an amazed grin as the new armour’s plates slid and folded into place, the chest tightening around his own as each of the anatomically-accurate plates covered his body, the thick boots locking and tightening with the same happening to the gauntlets, the legs and crotch protecting their innards before Stark handed Peter the thick, glass helmet.

“Get ready for this kid, it’s the best part.” Stark grinned. “Just place the glass on your face and the tech’ll do the rest.”

Peter followed the instruction, placing the cold and heavy glass to his face, it fitting perfectly, before their was a whirring noise and the small metal parts on the side of the mask began to fold around his head, locking into place as the suit’s U.I booted up and several bright cross-hairs, statistics, body and suit vitals and area analysis reports appeared on screen for him to watch.

“Oh… this is so fucking-” he began before realizing that he now spoke with a reverbing, mechanical voice, the suit disguising his vocal patterns to hide his identity further “Oh fuck me this is cool.”

“I know, the others seem to think so too.” Stark nodded.

“The others?” Peter asked “You mean the rest of the team, right?”

“Oh no, I mean the U.S Marines, the British SAS, the Ryker’s Island security force, the SWAT team.” Tony listed “This is Stark technology and it is up for commercial sale, in fact our very own Secretary of Defense, Princess Luna, bought roughly ten thousand of these suits for use in the American Special Forces teams.”

“Well… I feel disappointed.” Peter sighed before shaking his head “Nevermind, I’ll live with it, so you said about a test drive, right?”

“Indeed he did Master Parker” Cassie’s voice said in Peter’s ear, the sound wave for her speech appearing in the suit’s HUD.

“Hey, it’s great to see you’re okay Cassie.” Peter smiled, genuinely pleased to have her back. “How’re you feeling?”

“Salty.” she chuckled “I’m glad you’re okay too Master.”

“So am I, so, what’s the low down on this thing’s abilities?” Peter asked.

“Well, it’s not one of Mr Stark’s suits, so don’t expect the thing to be flying or firing repulsor shots any time soon, but it is equipped with its own motorized joints that will greatly boost strength as well as being light enough to not hinder your movement or affect your speed in a negative way.” Cassie explained. “It’s also able to generate it’s own electric current which can be channeled through the gauntlets and boots of the suit to allow for electrically-charged attacks to keep opponents down for longer.”

“Well… that’s fucking awesome.” Peter nodded “Any special toys it comes with?”

“Several, Mr Stark improved the basic design of your web-shooters and implemented them into your gauntlets, protected by a layer of fibre to prevent them being electrocuted by the charge the suits carries, as well as having larger web canisters installed to allow you to use them for longer before needing to reload, he added in an improved version of the coded that allows you to actively scan for available frequencies as well as modifying the helmet to make it completely soundproof so you don’t need to worry about being heard and to top it all off he gave it pockets that you can open by asking me.” Cassie explained “Does that meet your standards?”

“Indeed it does.” Peter nodded, turning to face Tony. “Thanks man.”

“No problem, now, get out there and see how you like it.” Tony said, pointing to a nearby window.

Peter stepped towards Tony and noticed that he now stood slightly taller than him, the boots he wore giving him an extra bit of height.

“Huh.” he stated.

“It’s throwing you off a little right?” Tony asked.

“Yeah… eh, I’ll get used to it.” he said with a shrug, moving towards the window in the nearly weightless suit “Now to look for the Scorpion.”

Scorpion V2.001

Mary DeMarco dragged a green fingernail under her chin, twisting her wrist over before tapping the same nail in the chest of the new Scorpion armour. This one had her own personal touch added to it; a much sleeker and curvy design with a better coat of emerald green paint.

This time, the helmet was much less blocky and more stylized, the clunky bottom of it having been removed entirely and replaced with a retractable mouth guard, a black glass visor covering the eyes with the rest of the head being flat and well-fitted.A small armoured area allowed her hair to fall free and hang on the shoulders of the armour, the bulky shoulder pads being replaced with flat, sharp edges, as had the bulky gauntlets now being replaced with flat metal gloves with the area of the arm before the elbow having their own sharp edge.

The lower body had been designed with intersecting plates to allow more rapid and versatile leg movements with thin, ankle supporting boots equipped with shock absorbers to allow her to jump from higher heights and land without  fear of injury.

The tail was now much thinner, Otto having explained that it was now able to lift over forty tons due to the suit’s new endoskeleton that lined the innards of the suit and attached to Mary’s body.

One of the newer features hse approved off were two built-in grappling hooks in the gauntlets as well as a concentrated gas valve that allowed her to spray whatever type of gas she wanted.

“This newer suit should be much better designed to handle the more acrobatic fighting styles of Spider-Man, as well as allowing the user to throw a much more powerful punch and receive one in kind thanks to the Stark-based MR fluid-enabled tri-weave-”

“Look,” Mary said with a wave of her hand, turning around and leaning against the suit. “I’m not interested in how it works or what it’s made of. I just wanna know if it’ll let me smack our little spider around.”

“Well… if that’s what you want to know, then yes,” Otto nodded, setting down the clipboard he was reading off with a heavy sigh. “But Mr. Osborn did want me to inform you that the suit is a temporary loan and that he wants you to return it once your job is complete.”

“Oh he did?” Mary asked, walking over to the shorter and and leaning over to him, raising an eyebrow in a playful manner. “Well, is he gonna come down here and get it back himself?”

“I-uh-I don’t… I don’t think so,” Otto stumbled, staggering back from the beautiful woman, his foot hitting a stray wire and nearly causing him to topple before Mary grabbed hold of his shirt. She lifted him off the ground entirely with both arms and smiled in a friendly manner, this action soon be to in great contrast to her next sentence.

“Well then, I’d like you to tell Mr Osborn that he can kiss my clit,” she beamed, speaking in a cheery tone. “And if he wants the suit back he needs to come down here and fucking take it from me.”

With that, she dropped Octavius to the floor and strode over to the suit, the newer, easier to wear design making it very easy to change into as Octavius lay there on the floor, unable to move due to terror.

“Now, to show there’s no hard feelings, I’ll take care of the Web-Head for you,” she said, the helmet lowering itself into place, several metallic clicking sounds signifying the armour locking into place before the mouthguard launched out and connected, her voice becoming synthesised as she spoke. “Just don’t expect this thing back clean, pressed and hung up… or at all really.”

She blew a kiss mockingly before bending her legs and launching through the roof of the hidden laboratory, disappearing from sight and leaving Otto sitting there, contemplating how much this was going to come back to haunt him.

Mary landed softly on the wet ground, the rain having started to pour earlier that day, the storm being forecasted to last throughout the week. The rain pinged off her armour loudly, but the helmet lessened the sound for her due to its noise filtering capabilities.

“Now…” Mary said, cracking her knuckles loudly. “Time to head to the Estacado’s dockyard warehouse and cancel our little business deal.

Making quick, light movements, she was soon sprinting through the dark, gloomy streets of New York, using her tail to lash herself up onto larger buildings, vaulting from roof to roof as she made her way from the midtown safehouse down to the Battery City waterfront where the competitor crime family stored their drugs, kept safe from police warrants and anonymous tips by a paid off member of the police force.

The water splashed loudly under her feet, skidding around an air ventilation system and launching herself down onto the rails, landing on the train that would take her to where she needed to be faster.

“Right…” she said to herself, sitting down on her haunches and resting on her hands. “I can use the acid-spitter in the tail of this thing to melt through the door, the guards’ll be no problem if I just tear them to pieces or melt their faces off.”

She started carving a plan of attack onto the roof of the train car, using little stick figures with guns and herself, this one with big breasts and a smiley face, her own immature side surfacing during this time.

“Ha… I’m pathetic,” she chuckled, continuing to draw different ways she could take down the Estacado warehouse and kill as many of the guards there as possible “Now… if the plan works, I might be able to draw Spidey to me if I make a little bit of noise during the whole thing… though it would be quite a different story if now was the night Cage decided to come back from Kansas City and restart his career as a hero for hire… or Daredevil coming out of retirement… or the Fantastic Four coming in to help out… or Iron Fist… no, wait, he got booted back to that alternate dimension when Stark tried to search for alternate versions of himself to host a party because he was busy… at another party.”

She looked up into the rain for a moment, breathing a sigh of exasperation before scratching out the bait plan and moving over to a new, unscuffed part of the train to start doing some more doodles while she waited for the train to get to Battery City.

“Maybe… I could bait him out by capturing someone like the Tinkerer and offering to be a contact with information… but how would I contact him without walking straight into the Triskellion? Does he even work there or is he just training with the Avengers? Fuck me, I haven’tput this much planning into getting a guy’s attention since high school,” she said, lying down on her back and looking up into the storm clouds, watching the rain strike the lense of her mask and roll down slowly. “And even then, the way I did that was by flashing him outside his house and asking to go inside… that could work actually… most guys do like the sight of perky G-cup tits outside their bedroom window.”

She was silent for a second before sitting up on the train and looking down between her legs.

“What the hell am I talking about?” she asked with a laugh, resting her arms on her knees and sitting quietly for most of the rest of the train yard, wondering if she should visit the Tinkerer and ask him to install something like an iPod or a radio into the suit. After all, he did owe her a favour for hooking him up on a date with Black Cat a few years ago.

“Though that did go quite horribly. Young Ms Hardy was not too pleased with the fact that Phineas was about sixty years old… and she was nineteen,” Mary chuckled to herself, remembering how furious Felicia had been when she smashed through the window to her penthouse and demanded an apology.

And Mary did, then took her out on a date to a nice restaurant, went home, drank expensive alcohol, and talked into the small hours of the morning before having sex and parting ways the following afternoon

“I really should visit her again sometime,” Mary said, tapping the suit’s shoulders as she thought. “I quite enjoyed our little night on the town, and that was, lemme think, four years ago? Yikes, I definitely need to arrange another date with her… if either of us aren’t busy with another lover that is.”

She once again stood up, seeing the waterfront of the city out in the distance and deciding to get ready for her assault on the Estacado family business.

Round 2

“Master Parker, I’m intercepting police radio broadcasts talking about a fire down at the Battery City waterfront” Cassie said to Spider-Man.  “They’re claiming there’s a metahuman there and that they need backup,”

He sat up from the flagpole he’d been resting on, looking around the streets to try and mentally plan out a route to the waterfront. Cassie, quick on the draw as always, interrupted him with an onscreen map to the site of the warehouse.

“I knew where it was,” the hero responded, crossing his arms in protest.

“But?” Cassie teased.

“... Thank you,” he sighed, throwing himself off the flagpole and firing a web-line, angling his body through the air to take tight corners and make higher leaps.

“You know something?” he asked Cassie.

“I know several things, but I get the feeling you’re going to tell me something new,” she answered with a chuckle.

“Yes, smartass, I am,” Spider-Man grunted. “Jesus, I don’t think I’ve met anybody as annoying as you before in my life.”

“Looked in a mirror recently, big guy?” Cassie asked, a playful tone in her voice as Spider-Man vaulted over a rooftop, spinning in the air before landing on his feet, rounding off the roof and firing another web to his right, swinging hard around the corner “Very nice.”

“Thank you… and I’m not that annoying, am I?” he asked in a nervous tone.

“Goodness no,” Cassie answered.

“Well, that’s good to-”

“You’re about four times worse,” she finished.

“God… I now feel remorse for every villain I’ve ever taunted before in my life,” Spider-Man whimpered. “Should I just let them off me next time, do the world a favour?”

No, Master Parker, you’re not that bad,” Cassie chuckled. “Now I’d suggest hurrying up a little bit. things burn very fast, especially drugs.”

“Whoa, whoa, drugs?” Spider-Man asked, landing in between two large SUVs, using one foot on one car to stick between.

“Yeah, this place has been owned by the Estacados for the past fifteen years. They’ve done deals with the Vercettis, the Scalettas and, most recently, the Big Man in that place,” Cassie explained. “I’m guessing that somebody’s either making a play or it’s an outside agent trying to incite a gang war.”

“Do the cops know that? That it’s a drug warehouse?” Spider-Man asked, giving a wave to the young children in the back seat of the SUV he was facing before leaping into the air, grabbing hold of a streetlight and flipping himself up onto the top of it, holding himself in the air while he looked at the map displayed on screen.

“Next right, keep straight for three hundred metres and take the hard left,” Cassie said before continuing their conversation. “And yes, they’ve known for a while now.”

“Thank you,” Spider-Man nodded, pushing into the air and firing another web-line. “And the reason the cops haven’t intervened is? I mean, besides being busy getting funky with dancers at festivals and shooting, choking, beating maiming, etc. unarmed black men, I know that last one’s about eighty-five percent of the NYPD’s work day, but they’ve still gotta actually do some protecting and serving right?”

“Topical joke, that’ll go over well with the white folk,” Cassie said, giving a virtual thumbs up on the HUD in Spider-Man’s helmet. “But no, the reason they haven’t intervened in the drug trade in this city between beating on minorities is because most officers on duty are taking a cut from the Big Man.”

“Great,” Spider-man growled, landing on the top of a roof that overlooked the waterfront, seeing the blazing warehouse and what did look like a metahuman raising cain down on the street level “As if dealing with super-villains and flirting with cat-ladies in suits tighter enough to see what they had for lunch wasn’t enough, I’m going to have to do actual crime-fighting as well.”

“We all got problems,” Cassie answered nonchalantly.

“Yeah, I just didn’t think I’d be doing the Batman form of superhero stuff for a while,” Spider-Man sighed, leaping down onto the concrete dock and sprinting towards the burning warehouse.

His first reaction was to marvel at the corpses, the bodies either badly burned or torn to pieces, their weapons laying beside them, often melted onto their hands, shell casings and spent magazines decorating the blood, acting as morbid sprinkles on the blood caking the ground.

His Spider-Sense blared suddenly, giving him a direction of ‘Up’. Following his instincts, he leapt to the side, landing on a hand and flipping himself back up onto his feet, skidding to a stop.

“Damn,” his assailant growled angrily. “I was kinda hoping I could end this quick.”

“Yeah, sorry honey, quick and easy isn’t my style,” Spider-Man shrugged, standing straight and readying himself.

“Fair enough,” the Scorpion chuckled. “I like it hard.”

“Ooh,” Spider-Man said. “Schmexy.”

The Scorpion launched at him, digging her feet into the ground when she was several feet away, leaping into the air and using her momentum to lash her tail around at him.

Spider-Man caught the mechanical tail and prepared to throw it, only to have the mechanism cause it to bend, allowing the Scorpion to veer around and slam her foot into his helmet, the glass clanging loudly as he was sent rocketing to the floor.

The Scorpion flipped over backwards in the air, landing light on the floor before going on the offensive yet again, forcing Spider-man to lose more and more ground as brutal punches and kicks assaulted the gauntlets and plates of his stomach, the newer armour taking the brunt of the beating but leaving him no time to counter due to the green clad villain’s extreme speed.

“Cassie!?” Spider-man demanded. “Any ideas!?”

“Hang on, I’m scanning her suit. I’ll try and find a weakness, just hold her off for a little longer!” Cassie answered, going silent swiftly after.

“Right, how did I know my life would end up being nothing more than fending off ravenous women?” Spider-Man asked, dropping onto his back and booting the Scorpion in the stomach. The armoured enemy was sent flying back, however her tail stabbed into the ground and steadied her, allowing her to drop onto all fours and glare furiously at Spider-Man.

“That was a dirty trick,” she growled. “I don’t appreciate it.”

“Yes, because when we’re throwing punches in the blood pools of those you brutally murdered we have to stick to the playground rules, right?” Spider-Man asked. “I’m sorry if I offended you? Can we kiss and make up now?”

“I think I’d like that,” she chuckled, standing up straight and crossing her arms. “Now why don’t you take that helmet off and lay one on me big boy?”

“Sorry, there’s a rebreather in it I need to prevent myself from endangering humanity,” Spider-Man shrugged. “I can’t.”

“And what foul disease do you have that would harm us so?” she asked.

“Stupidity is highly contagious,” Spider-Man shrugged. “I don’t want to give it to you.”

“And that’s where we’re on opposites ends,” she chuckled. “I’d love for you to give it to me.”

“And as much as I hate to let a lady down, I’m gonna have to keep the helmet on,” Spider-Man answered.

“Oh, what a shame,” she sighed, squaring her feet and preparing for more combat. “You’ve left me riled up and unsatisfied… just like the others. I thought you were different?”

“Master Parker, I’ve found a weakness in her suit’s mechanics, the sides of the suit are made of a much thinner material than that of the rest of it,” Cassie cut in, Spider-Man having to dodge out of the way of an oncoming attack before having the tail wrap around his ankle.

“And that means I just have to hit it, right?” he asked the A.I as he was launched through the wall of the burning warehouse and into a blazing pile of what appeared to be marijuana.

“Ow…” he said, leaping off the pile and wiping off the remnants of the burning plant from his armour as he heard a sharp hissing noise in the back of his ear. “What was that?”

“I’ve activated your armour’s rebreather so you don’t inhale the smoke,” Cassie answered. “We don’t need you getting high on the job.”

“Fair play, now to get back out there and find out Scorpion,” Spider-Man nodded, leaping out of the burning building and checking the HUD for any sign of the Scorpion.

“Eyes right!” Cassie barked. “She’s heading off the dock!”

“Why the hell’s she running?” Spider-Man asked, launching himself forward with a web-line, seeing the Scorpion jump from building to building at great speed. “She practically had me on the ropes.”

“Don’t encourage her,” Cassie said, a crosshair locking onto the moving form of the Scorpion before she appeared on the map in the HUD. “Right, that’s her marked, you should be able to track her movements wherever she goes now.”

“Did you just do the Splinter Cell marking system?” Spider-Man asked, sliding under a vent before webbing around the corner of a building. “I always wondered how that works.”

“The suit’s able to do it through two different methods, the first is using the armour’s own bio-electric scanner to get a reading on certain individuals by detecting their own bio-electric current before beaming the information up to the S.H.I.E.L.D controlled satellites before it detects the field itself and places them on the map or, in the helmet’s case, allows you to track them through walls.”  she explained.

“And what’s the second method?” Spider-Man asked, gaining more and more ground on the Scorpion as she made her way towards an unknown location, her finger pressed to the side of her helmet.

“The second method is pheromones, each person has their own specific scent, whether it be through cologne or just their natural body odor. The armour’s then able to take a sample of the molecular structure of that specific compound and track it through the air using its particle sensor, it can work on practically anything, living or not.” Cassie continued.

“Wow… this thing’s awesome,” Spider-man grinned. “I might keep this and not use the old suit any more.”

Spider-man moved down quickly, webbing Scorpion’s foot and forcing her to a stop. He dropped down and slammed his fist into the back of her head, this tearing her foot free while at the same time sending her down to the floor at a faster pace then she would’ve liked.

As if by some enhanced muscle memory, the tail wrapped around Spider-Man’s body, constricting and tightening to a dangerous level.

The Scorpion pushed herself back up to her feet with a grunt, rubbing the back of her armoured head.

“Ah… so you’re a fan of the donkey punch, I see?” she asked, using the tail to lay him down on the floor before she stepped over him, lowering her body onto his and placing a finger under his chin “I don’t think I know you well enough to be getting into the abusive sex… just yet, that is.”

With Spider-Man struggling to pull himself free and Cassie blaring warnings in his ear about the armour reaching its breaking point, she decided she could take a few minutes to gloat on her victory over him before making her decision.

“You know something Spidey… when we first met, I wasn’t too keen on you,” she admitted, flicking her green hair off her shoulder and behind her, the mouthguard retracting and exposing her full, green lips slanted in a smirk. “But I must admit, you’ve grown on me. Despite your great incompetence and complete ineptitude as a ‘superhero’, I think I like you… so I’m going to make you an offer, one that I hope you’ll like as much as I do.”

Spider-Man didn’t respond, his eyes flicking through different displays on the inside of his helmet before noticing something on a newer screen.

“Cassie?” he whispered. “Switch to the thermal display.”

“On it,” Cassie responded, the screen display switching to a multitude of colours, mostly greens and blues with an orange and red form of the Scorpion before him and a bright, orange object just behind them, appearing to be giving a thumbs up sign.

“So… Scorpion, can I ask you a question?” Spider-Man requested.

“Of course, my love, if it’s about my cup size then I’ll be happy to tell you,” she said, raising her arms above her head and smirking “Or show you, if you’re gonna be a good boy.”

“Alright then, what size bra do you wear?” he asked, biting the bait.

“34 G, they’re quite impressive aren’t they?” she giggled.

Very,” Spider-Man nodded. “Is your bra comfortable?”

“Quite,” Scorpion nodded.

“And another question,” he said, grinning widely under the helmet. “Is it fireproof?”

“An odd question,” the Scorpion said, tapping her chin with her nailed fingers “Why do you ask?”

“Ask Johnny,” Spider-Man shrugged, nodding over her shoulder.

Puzzled, the Scorpion turned around, just in time to have an enormous fireball slam right into the centre of her chest and blast her off him, Spider-Man grabbing hold of the base of the extended tail, planting his feet down before he was dragged up and wrenching the mechanical device off the armour, the joints going slack on his body and falling off as the Scorpion recovered before being blasted off the roof.

She got to her feet and snarled furiously at the Human Torch, her mouthguard clamping into place to offer protection from her newer adversary.

“Any weak points I need to be aware of bud?” Johnny asked Spider-Man.

“Yeah, try to weaken the sides of the armour and I’ll give her the old one-two punch,” Spider-Man answered.

“Right,” Johnny nodded. “Ready?”

“Ready,”

Break!”

The two of them dashed into action, Johnny firing two fireballs into the Scorpion’s direction, the woman able to swat them away only to have a brutal kick from Spider-man knock her sidewards, opening her up for a flaming rebound for Johnny, placing his boiling hand against the stomach and turning up the heat, a pained grunt coming from the Scorpion before she had her legs swept out from underneath her.

Johnny shoved her downwards, the weakened armour plate now being an even bigger weakness, slamming her hard into the floor and allowing Spider-Man to flip over and slam the heel of his boot into her face, shattering the visor loudly and revealing her green, enraged eyes.

Before moving away, Spider-Man pushed up on his hands, standing up straight with one foot on the Scorpion’s face, pivoting on his heel, and stepping down onto her chest before activating his adhesive powers to catch the weakened chest plate. He flipped over forwards, tearing the chest plate away and exposing the under armour the Scorpion wore, the brief amount of resistance from the armour pulling her onto the haunches before Johnny leapt forward and booted her square in the jaw, her head slamming down into the floor once again.

Spider-Man, not missing a beat, chipped the chest plate up to his hands before bending it over his knee, throwing it down over the Scorpion’s arm and webbing it into place.Johnny pressed his foot to the thick gauntlet and melted the gauntlet down onto the rooftop, gesturing for Spider-Man to use his webbing. the web-head granted the request and, after firing enough web-fluid onto the molten liquid the heat from the bottom layers, caused the web-fluid to solidify into a rock-like hardness.

And to finish the job off, Spider-Man webbed the ruined tail from its discarded area and used it to tie up her feet before crouching down next to her head, Johnny doing the same on the other side.

“So, what d’you think we should do with this one?” Johnny asked.

“I got the phone if you’ve got the pwn?” Spider-Man offered, tapping the side of his head before pointing at the Scorpion’s head.

“Fair enough,” Johnny nodded, cocking back his fist and slamming it into Scorpion’s head, the woman letting out a loud groan of pain before Johnny punched her again, knocking her clean out.

“Ow,” Johnny hissed, wringing out his hand. “Felt like punching a fucking truck.”

“You’ve done that before?” Spider-Man asked.

“All day, erryday boi,” Johnny nodded with a smirk.

“Right,” Spider-Man chuckled. “Leaving an anonymous tip for the police to come pick her up, and we are gone… I just wish the others went down this easy.”

“Too true buddy, too true,”

Informants Are Useful

Both Peter and Johnny sat on one of the eagles atop the Chrysler building, the two of them having stopped by a McDonald’s after having taken care of Scorpion and were now happily munching down their food.

“I never asked, but how come you were in the neighbourhood?” Peter asked the blonde teen through a mouth full of fries. “It was great that you came along when you did.”

“It was kind of an ego thing really,” Johnny answered with a shrug. “When I hear things about ‘Huge infernos’ blazing in the city, I just like to fly over to them and see if I could do better before draining the fire and calling it a day.”

“Drain the fire?” Peter questioned. “What d’you mean?”

“Well, with the whole Human Torch thing I can do more than just set myself on fire. I can control and manipulate fire to give myself a power up, which is another thing that makes me cooler than Bobby Drake.”

“Bit ironic, don’t you think?” Peter asked with a grin.

“I guess,” Johnny chuckled. “Probably shoulda thought about that one a little more.”

“So, d’you two not get along?” Peter asked, sipping from his straw to wash down a clump of fries stuck in his throat, grimacing in pain as his larynx was forced to expand.

“It’s not like that really, just a bit of friendly rivalry,” Johnny answered, propping himself against the wall a distance away and crossing an ankle over his knee.

“The whole ice and fire thing right?” Peter guessed.

“Fire and Ice,” Johnny corrected. “Because I always come first and I’m the one on top.”

Peter was silent for a long moment, allowing the seconds to tick by as he licked a piece of fry out of his teeth, taking a deep breath and raising a finger to ask a question before Johnny answered it for him.

“And no, that was not meant to sound as gay as it did,” Johnny said, putting a hand to his face and laughing quietly.

“Right, because if it was then I’d consider changing your name to the Humo-erotic Torch,” Peter laughed, defending himself as Johnny threw a blazing fry at him.

“Hey, I’m getting lectured about repressed homesexuality from the dude who runs around most days in a skintight unitard and teases mostly male supervillains?” Johnny asked. “Sounds like a closet-case to me.”

The two laughed quietly, Peter lying down on his back and looking up at the dark sky, the storm having halted for the moment, before asking a question.

“Though saying that, d’you think our costumes are a little… exotic?” Peter queried.

“What d’you mean?” Johnny asked in confusion.

“I mean… some superhero costumes aren’t even costumes. People like Captain America, their clothing’s supposed to be a symbol, and people like Luke Cage just wear civvies when they fight crime… but guys like you and me, wearing skin-tight, full-body suits do look quite strange,” Peter explained. “Especially when I’m fighting alongside people like Hawkeye and Black Widow who are just wearing combat uniforms… though in the case of Widow, she could use a little more coverage and protection over her mountain range.”

“Amen to that. It’s a nice thing to admire but it doesn’t really help her fight better,” Johnny nodded. “But in regards to Hawkeye, you should’ve seen what he used to wear about seven or eight years back.”

“What was it?”

“Purple suit, knight-esque helmet with a big ‘H’ on the forehead, tunic, and pirate boots.”

“Fuck off.”

“Nope, completely serious. It’s the same as Cap’s original forties design, before he became the Captain America we know today.”

“You mean Captain Puerto Rico, right?”

“You noticed that too?”

“How could I not… better question, how has nobody else told him?”

“They probably have and he just ignored them.”

“How? How can you go through every day of your life wearing a symbol that doesn’t apply to you and completely ignoring everybody that tries to correct you?”

“Well… he is Captain America, remember?”

“Oh yeah.”

“Exactly.”

The two sat quietly for several minutes before finishing their meals. Johnny soon received a call from Sue saying that he needed to be back at the Baxter Building ASAP.

“Fuck, shit, dammit, sorry man. I gotta bail out on you,” Johnny said, stuffing his phone back into his pocket.

“Don’t worry about it,” Peter nodded, bumping fists with Johnny before the other teen gave him a wave.

“See you round, Parker,” he grinned. “Flame on!”

“You too bud,” Peter said, watching as Johnny blasted off at high speed, disappearing into the streets and between buildings mere seconds later. Being left alone, Peter decided it was a good time to put his helmet back on check in on how the arrest of Scorpion had gone.

“So, how’re the boys in blue handling our Scorpion?” Spider-man asked Cassie, the A.I having been entertaining herself with other things whilst Peter and Johnny had talked.

“I’ll check their systems for any new matching her description and…” Cassie said, trailing off mid sentence. “Oh no.”

“Oh no?” Spider-Man asked in an alarmed manner. “Oh no what?”

“Oh no as in there hasn’t been a booking for the Scorpion… or an arrest for that matter, or even a sighting of her,” Cassie continued. “The police arrived at the location we’d designated only to find melted metal, shredded webs… and this.”

An image flashed on screen of a small calling card that had been left, a little black and white cat with a happy smile on it’s face telling Spider-man exactly who had broken the Scorpion out.

“Felicia,” he spat furiously, getting up and throwing himself off the edge of the eagle, plummeting down to just above street level and shooting a web-line, heading for Felicia’s uptown penthouse.

“Felicia?”  Cassie asked. “Felicia Hardy, the Mayor’s assistant?”

“Yeah, her, the Black Cat… I had no idea she’d be working for the Scorpion,” Spider-Man snarled, skidding on his knees across a large line of glass windows before springing off to another building and sprinting along it. “I knew she’d worked for the Big Man before, but… ugh, nevermind, I need to talk to her about this and see what the hell’s going on.”

“Hang on, if you know she’s the Black Cat, then why don’t you turn her in? Have her arrested and take one more criminal off the streets?” Cassie asked.

“Because she knows who I am. If she goes to jail with what she knows about me, I get several friendly visits from every big criminal in the city, and with Silvermane on his way out of the can and a personal vendetta set on me by the Big Man of Crime himself, being publicly exposed would be even worse than ever,” Spider-Man explained.

“Right, so she’s got you checkmated,” Cassie sighed. “That’s not a good position to be in.”

“No, it isn’t. But it does have its benefits, with Felicia being in deep with the criminal underworld I can use her to get to other high-ranking members of the mob,” Spider-Man continued, baring his teeth as Felicia’s apartment came into view. “I’ve got a plan. D’you think you can help me with it?”

“I can try, what d’you have in mind?” Cassie asked.

“Like I said, Felicia’s quite popular with criminals, assassins, drug barons, and mob bosses, Which means she’ll get a lot of attention from them. Phone calls, text messages, possibly even emails that I want access to,” Spider-Man said, swinging up and sticking to the underside of Felicia’s balcony. “So what I need you to do is hack into her I.P address and intercept any incoming messages that come through the internet, as well as tap into the wireless frequency her cell phone and house phone’ll uses to receive calls. Whenever she gets anything like that, you show me, can you do that?”

“Yeah, just get me close and I’ll get onto it,” Cassie agreed.

“Good, thanks Cassie,” Spider-Man said, crawling over to the top of the balcony.

He looked into the penthouse, seeing no sign of Felicia but being able to hear loud, pounding music. He ventured inside the penthouse, following the music through the apartment to the lower floor. He swiftly discovered that this lower floor was a fully-converted gym, fitted with a large amount of exercise equipment, ranging from dumbbells, barbells, adjustable bench presses, boxing bags, both speed and heavy, a multi-technique pull-up bar, as well as a large laminate floor with a pole mounted on the floor in the back of the room.

Felicia herself was currently staring at the ceiling as she used the bench, the HUD analysing the weights and informing him the ones she used added up to two hundred and ten pounds, an extraordinary weight for most people and even a woman of Felicia’s physique.

She hadn’t noticed him at that point and he decided to play a trick on her, scanning the room for the signal her iPhone was using to stream music to her speaker and interrupting the connection, the music shutting off.

Felicia paused, placed the weight back on the rack and sat up. Her eyes widened in shock as she saw the armoured figure standing against the wall.

She threw herself off the bench, landing on her feet and squaring them out, holding her hands out in a fighting stance. She seemed to relax her stance as she noticed the enormous spider symbol on the chest of the armour and the similar, neon-glowing blue eyes on the helmet.

“Spider?” she asked in surprise. “Is that you?”

“It might be,” he shrugged, his synthesised voice making it harder for her to place. “Or I could just be playing the Arkham Knight role and dressing up like my worst enemy… but I think unlike our dear Jason Todd, I’m not an enormous fucking let-down.”

“Yeah, okay,” Felicia said, relaxing and sitting back down on the bench press. “Now I know it’s you. Nobody else makes armour that awesome seem so pathetic in reality.”

“Jason Todd?” Spider-Man said, seeing Cassie deciphering the I.P address and beginning to scan through her emails using key search words and phrases.

“I have no idea who that is, Spider,” Felicia shrugged, wiping the sweat off her brow.

“How long’ve you been going for?” Spider-Man asked, crossing his arms.

“About an hour and a half,” Felicia said, pulling her workout shirt off her soaking body and throwing it into the corner of the room, doing the same with her yoga pants and sitting down on the floor, allowing her naked pores to release as much heat as possible to lessen her cooldown period.

“Can you hand me that bottle of Powerade please?” she requested, holding her hand out towards the side of the room where a bottle of blue sports drink rested.

He retrieved the drink, removing his helmet and setting it down on the side before walking back over to Felicia, the woman taking the drink with a thankful nod and downing most of it in one go, sweeping her sweat-soaked white hair out of her face.

“D’you wanna tell me why you freed the Scorpion?” Peter asked angrily.

Felicia froze in place, the drink still in her mouth, before continuing to sip from the liquid before speaking.

“I owed her a favour,” she shrugged. “That was all.”

“I don’t know why, but I feel like I don’t believe that for a second,” Peter said, pressing her for answers. “What sort of deal do you have with her?”

“A friendly relationship is all, sometimes more,” Felicia shrugged. “It’s not important.”

“I think it is. When you say more, what d’you mean? Partners in crime? Assassins?” he demanded.

“Hot, wet, drunk, promiscuous, lesbian sex is what I mean by more,” Felicia snapped angrily “Happy now?”

“No,” Peter continued. “With sexual relations comes a closer bond. You feel like you’ve gotta protect her or something?”

“You really do amaze me sometimes,” Felicia said, finishing off her bottle and throwing it across the room. She stood up straight and cracked her back loudly, grunting as she did so.

“Care to specify why?” Peter asked.

“D’you know how many guys are able to keep from getting rock hard, much less continue to interrogate a woman like me after she mentions eating out another woman?” Felicia asked. “I’ll give you a hint: not many.”

“It’s because I’m not interested in your sexual partners. I’m interested in your criminal ones Hardy,” Peter hissed angrily. “Now tell me where she is.”

“You’re no fun when you’re like this,” Felicia sighed. “You’re too angry to think clearly.”

“No, I’m not. I’m angry enough to start thinking clearly, something I never do around you and it’s something I should start doing more often,” he hissed.

“Look, I’m not talking to you when you’re acting like you are,” Felicia said, stepping closer to him and pressing her nude form against the armour, giving him a sultry look.

“Felicia, I’m not-”

“Listen here, Webz,” she said, placing a finger to his lips to silence him. “I’m gonna go upstairs and get a shower to clean off. I want you to come in with me and help cool down, then we can both get out, get something to drink, something to eat, have a quick fuck and see if you’re in a better mood then, okay?”

“Felicia, seriously-”

“Shh, no more talking,” she said. “Shower time.”

Peter growled angrily but allowed himself to be lead away by the cat burglar, wondering why he let her talk him into rolls in the sheets as often as she did.


Felicia nuzzled her nose into Peter’s neck as he massaged her voluptuous rear, the taller woman lying on his chest and purring quietly, the two of them having finished their little soiree together, and were now relaxing and enjoying each other’s company.

“Better?” Felicia asked her part-time lover.

“Yeah… much, thanks,” Peter nodded, looking up at the ceiling as the rain poured outside the penthouse. “So… are you gonna tell me what the Scorpion’s doing?”

“Well… actually, I was hoping you’d tell me,” Felicia said in a quiet voice.

“What?” Peter asked in confusion, looking down at Felicia, the green eyes of the cat burglar beneath him being filled with worry. “You’re telling me that neither of us know what she’s doing?”

“I… I think I might have an idea but… fuck, Spider, I have no clue and it’s starting to worry me,” Felicia sighed, sitting up and moving to the edge of the bed, resting her head in her hands. “We’ve been great friends for years now. We worked together, partied together, and slept together, she’s always kept me clued in on what she’s doing but… now, she’s gone dark on me.”

Peter sat up himself, moving next to Felicia and staring out the window, opening his mouth and growling out a single, strained word.

Fuck.”

Felicia looked up at him, a confused look on her face at Peter’s reaction.

“What’s wrong?” Felicia asked.

“It’s… it’s just that she’s your friend, good friend, and I’m gonna have to take her down soon,” Peter said, standing up and walking to the balcony door, leaning against it.

“And you don’t want to?”

“No, I do want to take her down, but… now that I know you care about her… I just don’t wanna hurt your feelings.”

“Why not? I’m not your girlfriend Spider, you don’t have to worry about upsetting me, especially when we’re both on different sides of the law.”

“I know, but that doesn’t mean I don’t care about you Felicia.”

“Right, slow down. I can understand having a hard on for me, but don’t you dare go emotionally soft on me Spider. I don’t want you bringing me flowers, I don’t want you buying me gifts and I definitely don’t want you calling me any cutesy nicknames.”

“Alright, whatever you say, Fi-Fi.”

Felicia walked over to him, giving him an affectionate look before punching him on the arm.

“Take that as a warning. If you call me Fi-Fi again, I promise that if they find your body, it won’t be in one piece,” she growled.

“Alright, point taken, Cat,” Peter chuckled, the taller woman leaning her head on his shoulder and allowing him to wrap his arms around her waist, squeezing her body against his.

The two stood silently for a long moment before Peter asked his next question, wanting to get on with business.

“So, did your informant get anything back on the medallion we found on the chopper crew?” he asked.

“As a matter of fact, they did,” Felicia nodded. “It turns out the pendant, not medallion, we got is a calling card that’s used by the Vercettis to mark their involvement in a gang war or murder.”

“Wait, if it’s that well known, then why don’t the police just arrest them when they find one?” Peter asked.

“Let me try that again. Only the most trusted members of the Vercetti’s crime family are supposed to leave it behind and only few outsiders known what it means. The police haven’t put that together yet and that’s why, my lovable smartass.”

“Right, then how do you know about it?” Peter questioned. “I don’t think you seem like the ‘Italian mob’ kind of girl.”

“No, one of the higher-ranking Vercetti goons spilled the beans after I blew him,” Felicia answered. “Nice guy, but he was hung like a fucking weasel.”

“Right, so what were the Vercettis doing trying to steal the codes to New York’s information servers?” Peter asked.

“From what my intel guy was able to pull up, they’ve apparently started working for Silver Sable, and by that logic, Silvermane,” Felicia explained. “If his logic was right, then the Vercettis are trying to piggyback off Silvermane’s return to power, as well as using their goons to do his work before he gets released, which is in three weeks time.”

“Right…” Peter said, looking up at the storm clouds outside. “So I’m thinking the best way to swipe one of Silvermane’s legs out before he even stands on it is to take down the Vercetti family.”

“And how do you plan to take down a mob family that’s been here since the forties on your own?” Felicia asked.

“Simple, from the inside,” Peter shrugged.

“You’re gonna go undercover?” Felicia asked with a surprised expression. “Ooh, just imagining you as a mob thug, a criminal… a bad boy… oh, the thought of that’s getting me wetter than the Niagara River.”

“Thank you,” Peter chuckled, running his fingers through her hair.

“How d’you plan to get into their family?” Felicia questioned. “They’re a trusting family and they destroy rats when they find them.”

“I’m not worried, if they try anything I’ll just take them all down as Spider-Man,” Peter grinned. “And as for how I’m going to get in… I’m sure Shining has a few ideas I can use… I’ll go see him now actually before he and Cadance head to bed.”

“You’re leaving?” Felicia questioned with a pouting expression. “But we’ve only fucked once… can’t you stay a little longer?”

“Sorry, Felicia,” Peter said, moving away from her and going back over to his discarded armour. “Duty calls.”

“Fine… but you come see me tomorrow so we can talk about how your infiltration attempt went,” she said. “And don’t stand me up again or I’ll kill your dog.”

“I don’t have a dog,” Peter said.

“Then I’ll buy you a dog,” Felicia shrugged.

“Thank you.”

“And then I’ll kill the fucker.”

“Then I’ll destroy your kitty.”

“Honey, you do that anyway.”

“Ugh, you’re such a slut.”

“And you fucking love me for it.”

Wrist-Mounted Awesome

“Master Parker,” Cassie informed Spider-Man as he swung through the air. “I’ve got an incoming call from Tony in regards to your new suit.”

“Put him up, Cass” Spider-Man acknowledged. “I want to thank him for making the best suit in the world.”

“How’s the suit working for you?” Tony asked, nursing a brandy as they spoke. “Not chafing or rubbing anywhere it shouldn’t be, is it?”

“Nope, this thing’s amazing. I couldn’t’ve asked for a better piece of tech,” Spider-Man answered with a grin.

“Well, I’ve got something back here that might change your mind,” Tony said. “Come on back to the Triskellion. I’ll show you what it is and why I needed your other suit.”

“Right, I’ll be there soon,” Spider-man nodded. “Spider out.”

“Sounds interesting,” Cassie commented. “I wonder what he’s cooked up for you.”

“Let’s hurry up and find out,” Spider-man said, firing a web onto a nearby building and swinging off the roof he was on, going through all the possibilities of what Stark could’ve cooked up for him.

Making quick time back to the Triskellion, Spider-Man was back in the lab Stark had sent him off in, seeing the older man standing over a table with a device in the middle of it, hooked up to several different wires and machines.

“So,” Spider-Man said, taking off his helmet, “Whatcha got for me?”

“Something you’re gonna like,” Stark said, sighing heavily before turning around. “And something else you’re not.”

“Well, with me being quite the cynic, gimme the bad news first,” Peter said, setting the helmet down on the table.

“Fury’s classified the armour you’re wearing a defcon two,” Tony sighed, taking hold of the helmet and looking at the black glass object.

“Wait… you mean I don’t get to keep it?” Peter asked in shock. “I only get to use this in a matter of national crisis?!”

“No, not national crisis kid, that’s defcon one. Defcon two, at least for us, is a state of the U.S being threatened; defcon three is a city being threatened; defcon four is a borough of a city, and defcon five is a street, which is what classifies as a lesser crime, and something you deal with on a daily basis.,” Tony explained.

“So you’re telling me that I can’t use this again until somebody threatens to blow up the entire New York State?” Peter growled.

“Or any of the other remaining forty nine states,” Tony nodded. “Sorry kid, it’s not my choice.”

Peter crossed his arms, staring angrily at the floor for a long second before sighing, and nodding in agreement.

“And I’m guessing it would be suicide to try and steal this thing?” he asked.

“Without a doubt, Pete,” Tony said, stuffing his hands into his pockets and walking back to the table.

“Well… fuck,” Peter sighed, hitting the release switch on his wrist, the plates popping out and sliding out of their locked positions, allowing him to remove the armour. “I’m gonna miss this thing… and Cassie, too.”

“I’m about to rectify that,” Stark said, looking at the computer screen on the table before grinning, seeing that whatever he was doing had finished. removing the small device from it’s many plugs and wires he handed the device to Peter.

“Is this what I think it is?” Peter asked with a grin, looking up at Stark with an excited glint in his green eyes. “Please tell me it is.”

“Put it on and find out,” Stark said, taking a step back and giving Peter space.

Peter examined the object thoroughly, it’s design being a simple steel band in a cuff-watch style with a large, blank screen set into a rotatable dial that seemed to be adjustable. On the sides of the device were two buttons, seemingly needed to activate it.

“So Stark, tell me what this is before I use it,” Peter requested with a grin, placing the device onto his wrist and watching as several small pieces of metal buzzed, locked and tightened to a perfect fit.

“Well… I call it the molecular transportation and armouring device. It uses nano-machines installed in any particular piece of clothing or accessories to break them down and transport them through teleportation to a predetermined location on the body to lock back into place with the others. This location is dictated by the programming of the nanomachines that transport them,” Stark explained.

“Right, so can we just skip the shit and call it what it really is?” Peter asked. “It’s a power morpher, Stark.”

“Huh, if you say so, kid,” Stark shrugged.

“Hey, can you see that thing that’s coming roughly a mile away?” Peter asked, looking out of the window.

“What… what are you talking about?” Stark asked in confusion.

“Oh, it’s the joke I’m about to make,” Peter smirked, squaring his stance and putting a determined look on his face before bellowing his next line. “It’s Morphing Time!”

With the iconic callout, Peter cocked his right hand back while extending his left out in front of him. He then brought his right wrist up to his left shoulder while at the same time bringing his left hand back into the morpher, activating the sequence and, once hearing the morpher power up, lashed both of his hands down to his waist, and held his fists upwards and tensing.

With a bright flash of light, his usual Spider-Man duds were transported from wherever Stark had put them and, using the nanomachines, removed the under armour he wore for the other suit as it covered his body with his old one.

With the suit being secured in place, he lashed his arms around briefly before dropping into a low crouch, holding one hand above his head and the other extended parallel to the floor, both hands performing his signature web-shooting pose.

“Spider-Ranger, online!” he said, standing up straight once more and assuming a ready stance.

Stark was silent for a long second before clapping sarcastically, chuckling under his breath.

“Beautiful, simply beautiful,” Stark laughed. “You colossal, fucking dork.”

“You have no idea how long I’ve wanted to do that,” Spider-Man said, dancing back and forth on his feet in an excited manner. “Did I do good?”

“Beautifully, Master Parker,” Spider-Man heard Cassie say from lower down.

His eyes fell onto the morpher, holding it up to check it only to see a projection of a gorgeous, long-haired woman come from the watch.

“Hang on… Cassie?” Spider-Man asked in shock, noting the outfit, hairstyle and large-busted design she’d been given. “Is that what you’re supposed to look like?”

“I’m not supposed to look like anything,” she answered “With the morpher having projection capabilities, I decided to give myself an appearance that you’d find visually appealing, as well as something that matches the voice I’d been given, I’ll tell you the inspiration later, if you wish?”

“Uhhh… yeah, sure,” Spider-Man nodded, looking back up at Tony, the billionaire merely shrugging in confusion. “Anything else, Tony?”

“Nope… that’s it, get going kid,” Tony said, waving goodbye.

“Right, thanks man, I appreciate it,” Spider-Man said, the two men thoroughly weirded out by Cassie’s gorgeous physical appearance. “See you round… I guess.”

Life Lessons

Peter walked up the stairs to Shining and Cadance’s apartment, conversing with Cassie about her choice on her body proportions.

“So, wait a second, did you search the internet to find the most popular body types for women, or what?” he asked.

“No, I looked through your phone’s internet history when I was installed on it, read your messages and saved images to find out what you liked,” Cassie explained. “And through that I found out that you and Harry both found the physique of the Wii Fit Trainer to be quite attractive, though there were multiple messages involving more racy interpretations of the character… no judgement. I also discovered that your preferred breast size was a G-cup and your favourite hairstyle, though not real, was that of Kirche Zerbst from the anime Zero No Tsukaima, and though your favourite hair colour is blood red, I went for regular black. But with the only colour this watch can project in right now is static-blue, colour doesn’t really matter right now.”

“You read through my messages… and looked through my KeepSafe Vault?” Peter asked in a horrified manner.

“Yes, and as far as pornography goes, I found it to be rather tame. Nothing freaky or unnerving, no macro or unbirthing fetishes, nothing strange like that. Just good ol’ fashioned sex,” Cassie said, joining her hands behind her back and grinning. “That reminds me, d’you like the outfit? Or is it a bit too casual?”

Peter studied the outfit Cassie had picked out, it being a pair of jeans, shirt and jacket. he didn’t think it was awful, but it felt a little too ‘Mary-Jane’ for Cassie. Thinking for several seconds, he came to a conclusion, describing the outfit he wanted her to wear from then on.

Cassie changed on command, now donning a pair of tights, black heels, a black skirt and a white office blouse, adorned with thick cuffs and a silk look.

“Huh, I quite like it,” Cassie nodded. “Has a very secretary-ish look to it.”

“It suits you,” Peter nodded. “Now I’m gonna need you to go dark for me, just for a while, alright?”

“Okay, talk to you later,” Cassie nodded, her hologram disappearing and the morpher powering down.

“Right, here we go,” Peter said, knocking on the door to the apartment and waiting for someone to answer.

Several seconds ticked by before the door swung open, revealing an exhausted-looking Shining, his hair a mess and his eyes black with bags decorating his face.

“Oh… hey, kid,” he said, stifling a yawn before rubbing his eyes. “What d’you need?”

“Undercover work, mostly,” Peter said with a shrug. “More specifically, in the Vercetti family.”

Shining crossed his arms, examining the expression of the teenager before shaking his head.

“Rght, best we talk about this inside,” he said, waving Peter in. “I have a feeling you’ve got something crazy in mind.”

“Don’t I always?” Peter grinned, walking inside and following Shining into the living room. Peter immediately noticed the lack of Shining’s ball and chain, whether through the lack of her constant humming, singing or swearing in the house or the fact that the place seemed about one hundred percent less beautiful without her, it still wasn’t a welcome change.

“Where’s Cadance at?” he asked, stuffing his hands into his jacket pocket.

“Work,” Shining answered, heading towards the kitchen area. “You want a drink?”

“Only if it’s a soft one,” Peter answered.

“Right, Fosters it is then,” Shining grinned. “That’s the softest drink on the planet.”

“Very funny, pal,” Peter said, shaking his head with a smirk. “If you’ve got a couple of cans of coke, then I’ll be alright.”

“Very well then,” Shining said, taking out two cans of coke zero, washing them under the tap before throwing one across the room. Peter caught it by the tip of his finger before bringing it down to his hand, the cold, moist can sending a shock through his nerves, having to quickly switch back and forth to prevent freezer burn. “So… whatchu want?”

“Like I said, undercover work,” Peter answered, cracking open the can and taking a quiet sip, exhaling in satisfaction as the cool, crisp liquid flowed down his throat.

“With the Vercettis, right?” Shining asked. “Any specific reason? Or just for shits and gigs?”

“Well, my informant in the criminal underworld has informed me that the Vercettis are making a play for control of the city, and word on the street is that they’ve taken a high bid from Silvermane, or his darling daughter, to be his muscle when he gets out of prison,” Peter explained. “And my informant and I agreed that the best thing to do would be for me, not as Peter or Spider-Man, would be to go undercover to get evidence to sink their little friend-ship before it even gets out of the harbour, dig?”

Shining placed his hand on the counter, lowering his head and laughing under his breath before looking back at the smaller teen with a wide smile.

“Ah… fuck me, I don’t think I’ve ever heard anybody sound so white in my entire life, and that wasn’t even gangster slang,” he laughed. “Right, anyway, you seem to know what you’re doing, so why d’you need my help?”

“Well… I figure fighting the criminal underworld is kinda like driving a car for the first time, you have a basic idea of what you’re supposed to do and how to do it, but you need someone to help you along the way,” Peter explained, taking another drink, covering his mouth with his hand and continuing to speak as a new point appeared in his mind. “Also, I can bring the evidence to you and you can make the arrests after I’ve done so.”

“Right… so, where are you looking to start?” Shining asked, crossing his arms and swilling the liquid inside his soda can.

“I… honestly, I have no idea,” Peter sighed, rubbing the back of his ankle with his other leg. “I was hoping you’d give me somewhere to start.”

“And I can, but it depends what you’re aiming to do, if you’re aiming to be just a regular thug who might overhear a few things every now and again,” Shining began. “Or do you wanna be the centre of attention who these guys come to to get the work done?”

“Which is gonna get the job done faster?” Peter asked.

“Huh, that’s unusual,” Shining said, raising an eyebrow.

“What d’you mean?” Peter asked in response, sipping from his can once more.

“Most guys usually ask which position is safer,” Shining answered, leaning back against the counter and exhaling slowly. “You’re not worried about your own safety?”

“If I was, d’you think I’d run around in brightly coloured spandex in front of guys with guns, purposely trying to piss them off?” Peter asked with a grin.

“Fair point, centre of attention it is then,” Shining said with a shrug. “But I wanna warn you of something.”

“Which is?” Peter asked.

“The attitude you’ve got, the whole ‘Don’t come down until I’m struck down’ thing, it’s not impressive Peter,” Shining said. “The rebel without a cause attitude is attractive for teenage girls, but you’re not gonna be a teenager forever, you’re gonna grow up, you’re gonna work, make friends, fall in love. And when you do, you’re gonna have to realize that you can’t just throw yourself into the meat grinder and die with a smile on your face. There will be people who’ll miss you, people closer than your Aunt May, a wife, maybe even children who will be destroyed by your death.”

“Oh… right,” Peter said, scratching the back of his head with an awkward expression. “I… I never really thought about it like that… but I guess that the confidence helps me deal with all.”

“But it’s not confidence Peter, it’s arrogance, the arrogance that everyone has before they’ve tested themselves against the world and come away bleeding. With you throwing caution to the wind and sprinting through life at the pace you have been, being able to overcome all your challenges without understanding how you did it, you haven’t realized that you’re not making yourself stronger.” Shining continued. “The lack of challenge for you has only made you big-headed, thinking there’s nothing you can’t take. That’s the worst attitude to have in your line of work because you’re too busy patting yourself on the back to keep your defenses up. And when that crushing blow comes, it’s not only gonna hurt worse than anything before, it’s gonna destroy you.”

Peter stood, staring at Shining in disbelief at the words of wisdom he was receiving. Surely he was exaggerating slightly? Peter had been challenged before and he was getting better and better with every opponent he faced; each victory, each training session and every piece of advice he’d been given made him better and better at what he did.

But was he arrogant? Was he just a rebel without a cause? No, he knew what he was doing. He was helping the city, saving hundreds of lives a day one day at a time. He’d been arrogant when he’d first gotten his powers, wanting to fight everything that moved and look where that had gotten him:

His Uncle Ben had died, taught him the lesson that motivated him to do this. But then a thought struck him: why had he decided to become Spider-Man in the first place? Did he even think about the responsibility of it? From what he remembered, it was because he’d felt he could do this job better than the police could.

Because he was sure he was better at it than they were.

Because he was sure he was better.

Because he was sure.

Because he was over-confident.

Because he was arrogant.

Peter shook his head, beginning to question himself, his motives, and what exactly he was doing this for. He was doing it because it made him feel good? He had everything going right, he had the super strength, the muscular body, the hot criminal fuck buddy, the excitement that he’d never had before in his life.

He loved doing this because it was fun.

But what about when it stopped being fun? He’d heard it from Steve when they’d first started training that it was only gonna get harder. Enemies would learn about his abilities, learn how to combat them, and make the fights harder and harder. He’d fought the Enforcers and the Scorpion on his own and nearly lost.

No, not lost.

Died. He’d nearly died, there and then. His life could’ve, would’ve, been ended by those supervillains less than a year into his career if it wasn’t for Felicia. In fact, how many people had he defeated on his own? He’d faced three major villains so far, the first being Electro… no, Elektra, and she’d beat him so quick it wasn’t even worth a joke, then he’d been saved by an interruption.

He’d beaten Electro, sure, so that was one to him. Then there was the Vulture, a fight that had been ended instantly by Carol. Carol had ended that fight with no more effort than a grown man uses to pick up a lego brick. It was a waste of her time, an item on her shopping list that was slightly out of her way on the way to the other things she had to do that day.

Then there was the Scorpion, a fight he would’ve lost if it wasn’t for Johnny interference, allowing the two of them to overcome her in an unfair fight. And he’d been patting himself on the back as a great superhero, as the Amazing Spider-Man. The superhero who had one, single victory to his name while most of his battles had been won for him.

Then he thought back to before he’d begun training, the first fight with Felicia he’d lost, then he was taken down by both Captain America and Black Widow with no effort on their part whatsoever.

This realization sent a horrible shock through his body, the knowledge of how easy it was for him to fail, one wrong move, one weak step and he was dead. He’d been a match for one opponent, only being able to beat him through an enormous weakness, a weakness he’d exploited to beat him. So that shouldn’t have even counted as a victory for him, he’d cheated.

With Elektra, Felicia, Cap, Widow, Scorpion, the Enforcers, excluding the training sessions he’d lost, that put his record at zero wins to six losses. He was no superhero, he was some punk in a costume congratulating himself on victories that weren’t rightfully his, being considered to stand alongside such legends as Captain America, the man that almost single-handedly stopped the Red Skull, Ms. Marvel, the woman who’d stopped an alien invasion, Black Widow, the Saviour of Bethlehem, Hawkeye, the Hero of Cape Town, Thor, the Norse God of Thunder, the Incredible Hulk, the artist formerly known as “The-Strongest-There-Is”, Iron Man, the billionaire genius. Even Jessica Drew seemed to have a better chance at being a superhero than he did, she’d been trained to be a S.H.I.E.L.D agent since she was a child.

Putting a hand to his face, he sighed loudly, placing his coke on the side and feeling his fighting spirit deflate.

“D’you find something out about yourself?” Shining asked with a firm tone.

“Yeah… I’m a fucking failure,” Peter said, running his fingers through his hair, a knot in his throat and a sickening void in his stomach. “I’ve been carried through every fight I’ve ever had, been given chances I don’t deserve and training that somebody else should get.”

“C’mon kid, don’t be so hard on yourself,” Shining said, pointing at Peter with his can. “You’re fifteen, you’re still learning how to do this, you can’t expect to pull that mask over your head and be the world’s greatest hero in a day, do you?”

“I… I don’t know,” Peter said, rubbing his brow with a tired expression.

“Then let me tell you something, most amateur boxers start at around nineteen, twenty years old. They fight as hard as they can and someone sees them, takes them to the big time when they’re twenty-one,” Shining began, Peter looking up at the older man with a raised eyebrow. “And everyone who fights wants to be the champion, but it’s not something they just give away to people. Hell, they don’t even let you attempt to go the distance until you’ve proven you can do that.”

Peter nodded, his mind flashing back to all the times his Uncle Ben had sat him on his knee as a child after a bad day and had told him a story or a metaphor, just like this one. A tale about why you should never give up, or a tale about how failure is the best way to succeed, or a speech he’d told him years ago, one he later admitted he’d taken from a movie that he couldn’t quite remember perfectly, about how you need to keep going, even when the beating seems unbearable, it’s the fact that you can take it that makes all the difference.

So Peter was encapsulated by the story, his mind opening to the tales of grandeur he’d been brought up on of success and triumph over hard times.

“A boxer isn’t a champion the second they step into the ring. A boxer is putty, putty that is taken and moulded by a trainer, by a manager and, most importantly, by the man in the other corner of the ring. These men beat this boxer into perfection, they beat him to shape him, they beat him to condition him, they beat him to strengthen him. But most importantly, they beat him to perfect him; after all, you can’t dodge that punch unless you’ve been hit by it before, until you learn how he throws it. You can’t know the pain of having to go through twelve rounds until you’ve done it. And you can’t know how to win unless you’ve experienced how to fail. What I’m saying, Peter, is that a boxer goes through hell, every day of his life while he’s aiming for that belt, hardship after hardship that would break the weaker and strengthen the stronger, and once he’s holding that belt he looks back on those behind him, everything he’s overcome, and as he hefts that belt over his head, bellowing in victory, he realizes something, something important.”

“And what’s that?” Peter asked.

“He realizes, as I’ve told you, that nobody is born a champion, but they are born as contenders,” Shining said, taking a sip of his soda before finishing his speech. “And every champion was once a contender that refused to quit.”

“I… uh, wow,” Peter said, scratching his head, slightly overwhelmed at not only the relevance, but also the truth behind the tale. “You’re right, Shining, you’re completely right.”

“I know, I always am,” Shining grinned, swapping his soda into his other hand and standing up straight. “Now, let’s go draw up a plan for you and your undercover work.”

Crushing Reality

Shining stood with his hands raised up to his shoulders, staring intently at the desk cluttered with objects that ranged from stacks of paper to laptops and empty coffee mugs.

“Gimme a sec, Pete,” he said with a sideways nod to the smaller teen. “I just gotta clean this up.”

And with that, he proceeded to place his hands on the left edge of the desk, and with a mighty sweep, threweverything off the side of the desk and onto the floor. Peter looked at the blue haired man for a long second with a surprised expression, Shining responding to the look.

“Don’t lie, you would’ve done the same thing too,” he said, crossing his arms and raising an eyebrow.

“Indeed I would’ve, but you do realize you have to clean that up, right?” Peter asked.

“No I don’t.”

“Why not?”

“I’m married?”

“So?”

“Why do you think I have a wife?

“Would it be, oh I don’t know, to slap you around the ears every time she catches you making remarks like that?” Cadance asked from the doorway, the apparently stealthy princess having made her way into the house with nary a sound.

“M… Maybe?” Shining said with a shifty look. There was silence in the room for a long moment before Cadance shook her head.

“What’re you two talking about?” she asked, looking at Peter with a wave. “Hiya, Pete.”

“Heil,” Peter responded, receiving a very puzzled look from Cadance, the woman shaking her head and turning back to her husband.

“Anyway, what’re you talking about?” she asked again.

“Y’know… nerd stuff,” Shining shrugged, scratching the back of his head.

“Oh really?” Cadance asked with a tone and expression so devoid of belief that somewhere in the world, a Catholic priest died. “What nerd stuff would that be and can I join in?”

“You wouldn’t be interested,” Shining shrugged, not fooling his wife for a second. “It’s really nerdy.”

Try me,” she dared in a cold tone.

“Right, okay… uh, Pete… you were saying?” Shining asked Peter, his eyes screaming and begging Peter to come up with the best lie he’d ever told to get them out of the situation.

“Right, yeah,” Peter nodded, using a good chapter from the Parker Philosophical Pamphlet of Phucking Phoolishness to get them out of the beehive. “So, a lot of people have been in debate recently of whether or not a day-one release patch is better than them releasing the patches slowly over the course of the next coming weeks. The day-one is often looked upon badly as it seems like the developers, or most likely the publishers, rushed the game out the door in an unfinished state and merely told the developers to work overtime to get the patch ready before the games hit store shelves, this being the limbo time between shipping and selling. But the people that defend the companies as well as day-one patches say that they’d rather have to sit through a two, three or four gig download and play the game straight after than have to deal with lag, framerate loss, and crashing servers, the most common things found on day-one releases. Server crashing however is not a sign of an incomplete game, though it is a sign of either incompetence or poor planning, the latter being the case when Rocket League was released, an absolutely amazing indie game for the PS4 and PC that, despite being from a relatively small indie company, was brought to the forefront of gaming and had thousands upon thousands of people buying and playing it on both platforms. So much sothat the servers the company had bought to host the games were unable to handle the constant stream of data flowing into them, the players themselves accidentally commencing a DDOS attack on the company through genuine want to play, and seeing as how games recently have been devoid of freshness and by the numbers, especially with exclusives and supposed next gen titles having been nothing more than tech demos showing off mediocre to bad gameplay, like Killzone Shadowfall, Titanfall, Battlefield 4, Knack, Ryse Son of Rome,  and Watch_Dogs being this generation’s mediocre games that aren’t offensive but aren’t very good either, to games like The Order 1886, Batman Arkham Knight, and Destiny being the worst example of games that were either hyped to shit and nothing really good came out of them, this being Arkham Knight, to games that were overhyped and were absolutely disgusting to the point of smashing the disk. I actually ran over Destiny with my chair, as I was personally offended by how little content I got for what it was, especially when the game had ten years and five hundred million dollars spent on it to-”

It was at this point that Cadance became overwhelmed with useless information that she had no context for. Groaning loudly, stared at Peter with hateful eyes as she slowly backed out of the room before closing the door. The monotone sound of her pained groans being traceable by ear to pinpoint her location as the sound of several doors closing, more groaning, and then the shower turning on, the faintest sounds of groans being able to be heard over the water.

The two men looked at each other for a moment before bumping fists and continuing their plan.

“Right,” Shining said, growing serious and turning back to the table and leaning on it. “Let’s draw up a plan.”

“On what?” Peter asked. “You threw everything on the floor.”

Shining looked back at him with a determined look before nodding.

“You’re right, that was a poor play on my part,” Shining growled, now having gone from serious to joking again, playing the role of the cliche, over-the-top, obsessed cop as he spoke. “Pick up something to write with and write on, we need to solve this case.”

“What’d your last bitch die of?” Peter asked, crossing his arms.

“Not following my orders,” Shining said, pointing at the piles of paper and machinery. “Work, bitch.”

“Ugh,” Peter said, moving over to the pile and scooping out several pieces of paper, a pen and, most surprisingly a copy of Magic Mike. He stopped where he stood, holding up the movie and pointing to it with a raised eyebrow.

“Cadance bought it and watched it for the strippers,” Shining shrugged.

“Then why is it in your office?” Peter asked with a confused expression.

“Because it’s a surprisingly good movie,” he said with a splay of his hands.

“I know, right?” Peter asked with an agreeing tone. “I was surprised at how easy it was to watch without feeling amazing gay... as well as having a pretty good plot behind it, smart writing and well directed… not in the way you’re thinking though. Tatum was acting his pants off in this movie too.”

The two of them snickered over the joke as Peter tossed the movie aside, picking up the supplies they needed and setting them down on the desk. Shining arranged them into a strategic-esque manner and brought up a few files on his computer. That was after having to sit through the extremely long load time.

“So… what’s this thing running on?” Peter asked. “Processor-wise, that is?”

“I don’t know… the guy in the store got mad at me when I started asking stuff like that, said he wouldn’t sell me anything if I didn’t just buy it and get out,” Shining said. “He was a prick.”

“Tell me about it,” Peter nodded, crossing his arms. “Last time I was in a store with an asshole shopkeeper, my Uncle Ben got shot.”

Shining turned his head in horror to look at Peter, the teen seemingly hit by the joke he had just made and shaking his head.

“Jesus… I actually regret making that one…” he said, a look of genuine shock on his face. “I can jest about the Holocaust and make light of the World Trade Centre attacks but that’s the one that gets me to feel bad?”

“How many Holocaust jokes d’you know?” Shining asked.

“A few, wanna hear one?”

“Sure, go ahead.”

“What’s worse than a bee sting?”

“Go ahead?”

Two bee stings. What’s worse than two bee stings?”

“I don’t know.”

The Holocaust!”

“Pete, c’mon.”

“What’s worse than the Holocaust?”

“I… tell me?”

“Three bee stings!”

“Alright, that’s about enough,” Shining said, trying to keep a grin off his face. “We need to get down to business.”

“Alright, taking down slash boosting the income of the Vercetti family, right?” Peter asked.

“Yeah… did we discuss the fall guy strategy last time around?” Shining asked.

“I… I can’t remember…” Peter said, scratching the back of his head. “Go over it again, just to be sure.”

Which is the author’s way of saying he’s too fuckin’ lazy to go back and reread previous chapters.

Shut up, Wade! You’re not supposed to be here yet!

You can’t stop me being here, can you? And anyway, I’m bored and wanna shoot stuff!

No, we agreed that you’d wait until after the party with Sable to go guns blazing, remember?

Could you tell me one more time? And focus on the gun part, I like that part. S’mah fave.

Can we have this conversation somewhere else please? Besides, I’m not done writing the chapter yet, and you distracting me right now is only keeping your official introduction at bay. You don’t want that, do you?

NEVERINAMILLIONYEEEEEERS

Good boy, now go and sit in the staff lounge with Sable, Doctor Strange, She-Hulk. and the others and wait for your turn to show up like a good boy. Go over a few of your lines with She-Rulk if you want to, maybe play ping pong with Doom for a while… just stay out of the story until you’re needed… okay?

Okay.

Wade?

Yeah, yeah…

Promise me?

Alright… I promise…

Good, now as a reward, go and tell Ultron you can borrow his throne until it’s his turn to show up.

Yay!

Is he gone? Jesus Christ… I love the guy, but fuck if he isn’t annoying. Right… where was I?

Uh, boss? A word please?

Yes, Jen? What d’you need?

It’s about Reilly… he’s kinda… stuck himself to the roof and can’t get down.

He’s been playing with the advanced webbing again, hasn’t he?

You know it, boss.

Can you get him down, Jen?

Oh yeah, easily. It’s just that, y’know, the web’s are too strong to tear off… it might bring the roof down on the place… we insured for that?

Yeah, no worries, the landlord’s the same guy who Strange rents the Sanctum Sanctorum from. He’s got guys that are used to buildings falling to pieces. Just pull Ben down, tell him to stop fucking around, and tell the landlord when he shows up my insurance’ll cover it.

Right, thanks, boss.

Yeah, see you around, Jen… right… where was I?

“Right,” Shining nodded, taking a deep breath. “Basically, the plan was to get the Vercetti’s power lay to work, to have them be in top form and on top of the criminal scene, so that when we take down the Big Man and they try to move up, we’ve got enough evidence to take them down without so much as breaking a sweat. Sound like something you agree with?”

“Yeah… that sounds simple enough,” Peter nodded. “What am I gonna have to do?”

“First off, make an identity for yourself, something that can’t be tied back to yourself or Spider-Man in any way possible. It’s gotta be something no one can see through… you’re still in with the Avengers right? With Natasha?”

“Yeah… why?” Peter asked with a raised eyebrow.

“S.H.I.E.L.D has technology that allows you to change your face into somebody else’s. You can use that to hide your face… but that still brings a problem up.” Shining explained.

“Which would be?”

“We need you to be in the centre of this, but you don’t have time to go through all their initiation bullshit that they usually do,” Shining continued. “You need to get to the top of the food chain in that world and fast… and I think I know how.”

“Care to share?” Peter asked.

“They’re not gonna take an ordinary crook seriously, just another thug with a gun and an empty wallet,” Shining said, walking closer to the door to listen for Cadance. “But if you’re something more, something that allows you to use your powers but not in a spider way, you might be able to impress them enough to earn their trust.”

“So… you’re basically telling me that in order to save people… I need to pretend to be a supervillain?”

Shining became still and solemn at this point, shaking his head before continuing the conversation in a grim tone.

“No, Peter,” he said. “Not pretend, you’re going to have to be a real supervillain, that includes robbing, murdering and destroying things… these guys aren’t supervillains themselves, but with you being more than just muscle, they’re gonna send you to big jobs. They’re gonna expect you to kill cops, kill civilians, other criminals and even innocent people. You’re gonna have to be a vicious murderer from dusk till dawn, Peter… are you prepared to do that?”

Peter’s mouth opened to answer with his usual attitude before falling silent. His mind beginning to work through all of the issues, problems and contradictions that came with it. Would be he helping people in the long run, or merely tarnishing the little difference he’d made in the city. Or by becoming a supervillain, even with good intentions, would he just make things harder for himself?

“Peter… I don’t know how much you know about philosophy, but have you heard of something called the Principle of Utility?” Shining asked in a calm tone.

“Yeah… ‘The maximum amount of pleasure for the maximum amount of people’” Peter said with a nod. “It’s the main point of Utilitarianism… at least the basic form.”

“I know it won’t make the hard decisions easier, but it might make you sleep easy at night if you adopt some form of philosophy to help justify your actions, if only to make yourself feel better.” Shining said, putting an arm on Peter’s shoulder. “I’d also advise finding someone you trust, and I mean trust with your life, and telling them your secret.”

“What?” Peter asked in shock. “Why?”

“So they can talk to you about it, so you don’t have to hide it from them…” Shining said, trailing off for a second before continuing talking. “And so you can have someone to wrap to wrap their arms around and tell you everything’s gonna be okay when the world starts crumbling down around you.”

“That… that’s not really something to worry about that often… is it?” Peter asked, getting no immediate response from Shining, this causing him to worry slightly. “Shining?!”

“D’you know why we have lifeboats?” he asked, seemingly out of nowhere.

“What?” Peter responded, genuinely taken aback by the question that came out of seemingly nowhere.

“Answer the question,” he stated. “D’you know why we have lifeboats?”

“Yeah… to stop people drowning when the ship goes down, why is this important?” Peter asked.

“And what do we have to stop ships from sinking?” he continued.

“N-Nothing… we build them as best as we can and…” Peter said, his eyes widening as the realization hit him like a truck. “Hope nothing goes wrong…”

“And we have those lifeboats to save as many as we can when it does happen. They’re not there to stop the ship from sinking, they’re there to make surviving it easier. Do you understand what I’m saying now, Peter?”

“Yeah… you’re telling me that when it all goes down… when it all goes to hell, I’m gonna need something to keep me alive,” Peter nodded solemnly.

“Then find someone Peter, find something to keep you going when it’s all fallen apart,” Shining said. “And when the world’s burning down around you, just hold that person close and let them do everything they can to help keep the two of you above the surface. It’s the two things a man needs to keep him alive: his code and his lifeboat.”

“I already have my code, ‘With great power comes-”

“‘Great responsibility, I know Peter, but that code’s about as vague as they get. It leaves too much up to interpretation,” Shining said. “Responsibility to do what? Save yourself? Your family? The city? The cornerstore? Does it become your responsibility to view a crime and punish accordingly? Or do you just hand them over to the judge and let the system handle them? Where does your responsibility start and how far does it stretch too? With the Principle of Utility, you have the code of saving as many people as possible, by any means necessary.”

“R-Right…” Peter nodded, his eyes casting downwards. “Everything I do needs to be for the greater good.”

“You make it sound so easy,” Shining chuckled, a morose expression on his face. “Then let’s have a quick test to see if you know what that really means, shall we?”

“Uh… alright.” Peter nodded, not sure where this one was going.

“Then let’s begin: thirteen year old boy’s holding a gun at a crowd of people and threatening to kill them all, you have a gun yourself,” Shining explained. “Five seconds: what do you do?”

“I… uh…” Peter said, knowing what the obvious answer was, but unsure of whether it was the right one, thinking of other ways he could get past the kid with a gun to save the hostages without hurting the-

“Time’s up, he’s killed everybody,” Shining shrugged. “You failed. D’you know what you were supposed to do?”

“What?”

“Kill the kid,”

“What? Why would you expect me to do that?”

“It’s for the greater good kid, you take one life to save a lot more, it’s how Utilitarianism works… care to try another one?”

“Sure,” Peter nodded, feeling slightly sick.

“You’ve got the limo transporting Celestia being attacked, as well as a school bus of thirty kids, who do you save?” he asked.

“Easy, the kids,” Peter responded instantly.

Wrong,” Shining said with a shake of his head. “You let the kids die.”

“What!?” Peter exclaimed. “But there’re more kids, Celestia’s only one woman!”

“Who runs a country, a country that would be thrown into disarray if she were to die. Power struggle, differing opinions, riots, destruction, job losses, murder, crime increase. It’s better if Celestia stays alive to keep control and order. So you let the thirty kids die. Care to try another one since you’re doing so well?”

“S-Sure.” Peter said. now feeling angry with himself for his incompetence.

“Alright then, masked maniac’s threatening to murder your Aunt May and MJ unless you save one of them and let the other die, who d’you save?” Shining asked.

Peter closed his eyes and thought, he cared more about his aunt than he did MJ, so that made one person. But MJ had her aunt, mother and father as well as her friends at school. MJ was also much younger than May, could do more, was still unmarried, and hadn’t become a mother yet. May was old and past it, couldn’t have kids, and would only leave one person behind. That was one for May and three or more for MJ, depending on how many friends and children she had.

Answer: Let Aunt May die.

“...Mary-Jane…” Peter responded, close to throwing up. “Save Mary-Jane.”

“It’s not easy, is it, kid?” Shining asked. “And remember the rule of the world: ‘You can’t please everyone’? Just remember that no matter what decision you make, you’ll always let somebody down, lose as many allies as you gain from that choice.”

“Are… are you trying to make me give up on doing this?” Peter asked with an angry expression.

“No, I’m just making sure you’re fully aware of what this entails. It’s not all about the fame, the adoration and the women, Peter. This line of work sucks everything you love out of your life and returns nothing but loss, emptiness, and pain. It breaks you down to the smallest remains of what you are and tells you to bring yourself back up, offering you no help to rebuild and taking every opportunity to break you again and again,” Shining explained.

“Then… then what the fuck is the point?” Peter asked, horrified to the core.

“Because you can go from being a stone to a mosaic Peter,” Shining answered. “You’re what you are now, that’s nothing to deny, but when you get broken again and again, when you have to rebuild time and time again, you’ll begin to arrange yourself into a shape, form a new pattern from the rubble, take every piece of you that you believed didn’t work and use it to make the perfect picture. With every time you’re smashed, you just get another shape to work with. You can take a bland stone and make something truly amazing out of it, Peter. It’s like I always say: what doesn’t break the man, makes the man.”

Peter lowered his head, running his hands through his hair and exhaling slowly, every second he spent in this house only serving to terrify him more and more. His teenage fantasy of superhero powers and pussy being brushed away by the truth of the harsh reality: there was no fun in this line of work.

By putting on that mask, he only opened himself up to more and more pain, thinking each victory was making him stronger and never stopping to acknowledge his own flaws. It was like Shining had said: ‘arrogance comes from never having tested yourself against the world and come away bleeding’.

He was right, Peter knew he was right. Shining was being straight with him, something the other Avengers had never done. While they were so focussed on building up his offensive and defense, they never once gave him anything to fall back onto, something to land on when the beating was too much to take.

Now that he thought about it: who was there for him? Who was in his corner when it became too much to handle? The other Avengers? Sure, he’d like to think they had his back, but to him, he was just another intern to train, maybe a friend for now, but once the word was given from a higher up they would kick him to the curb without a second thought.

Was it Twilight? No, it wasn’t. She didn’t understand what it was like to fight, to be beaten and to fail. If his legs fell out from under him she’d never be able to catch him, not a chance.

So that left one person: Felicia Hardy. The woman who’d shown no care for him outside of her bedroom, the woman that kept him alive only to see another sex session with her. Sure, he’d felt the same about her for a while, becoming enticed by her features and hooked by the claws. But he felt something more for her nowadays, an attraction to her, more than just her body.

It had taken the place of what he’d once felt for Twilight, his teenage crush had been replaced by a more adult feeling. It wasn’t love, he knew it wasn’t love. But now that he’d tasted the life of an adult relationship, he began to find the sex empty, meaningless. He might as well be sleeping with a blowup doll for all the emotion he received from Felicia afterwards, the Cat being ready to kick him out once he’d gotten her off.

He realized now and only now that he was alone. he had no one he could fall down beside, nobody he could rely on to be his rock when it became too hard to keep going. Even the mosaic comparison didn’t help. You need adhesive to stick things back together. He was the stone, but he had nothing to protect him from the weathering he’d face. Once he was carved and shaped into perfection… who’d keep him pristine? Who’d wax and buff him to keep him at top shape? Who’d be the one proud to stand beside the piece of art that had been crafted so amazingly?

No one was here now.

No one was there later.

He was alone… just a piece of art, left to fade away once it could be shown off no more.

Alone.

“Are you gonna answer that?” Shining asked, snapping his fingers in front of Peter’s face to get him to come back to reality.

“Huh?” Peter asked, his eyes focussing again and only now hearing the ringtone of his phone. He pulled it out of his pocket, checking the caller I.D before answering it.

“Mary-Jane?” he asked in a dull tone. “What’s up?”

“I was just… hey, Tiger, you alright there?” she asked, stopping speaking as she heard Peter’s wooden tone. “You sound a little down… everything okay on your end?”

“Yeah, just… yeah, all fine here,” Peter nodded, unable to even muster the bravado he would once carry around as if it were nothing, his soul crushed by the weight of the worries he’d just been handed by realization.

“No… no you’re not, Petey, you sound depressed as fuck,” she said, the sound of her switching the phone to her other hand being heard before her voice came back. “Hey… just stemming from me not liking my friends being bummed out and nothing romantic… would you be interested in another night on the town? Just the two of us.. platonically hanging out with no romance whatsoever?”

“I’d love to, but… I’m flat out broke,” Peter sighed, lowering his head to his hands. “I keep forgetting to get pictures of Spidey whenever he fights and I think Jameson’s about to fire my ass for not turning in work… sorry, MJ, I can’t.”

“My treat?” she offered. “I make nearly forty grand a year, Petey, a trip to the movies isn’t gonna be below the rim of my pocket it terms of funds.”

“I…” Peter sighed.

“Just say yes,” she pressed.

“I can’t,” Peter said.

“Wow, you sure pronounce the word yes differently with your accent… is it a New York thing?”

Peter smiled at the joke, the humour bringing him back to life slightly. He nodded, exhaling slowly before going for it.

“Alright, fine,” he chuckled. “You’ve twisted my arm, where should I meet you and when?”

“My place in about… an hour, hour and a half tops,” MJ said in a thankful tone. “I’m picking the movie as you’re playing the girl on this date.”

“Is that because you’re paying for it?” Peter asked with a smirk.

“Yes, baby, it is,” she said with a chuckle. “I’ll see you soon. Goodbye, you miserable bastard.”

“Bye, MJ,” Peter said, ending the call and stuffing his phone back into his pocket.

“So?” Shining asked.

“I’m going on a date, apparently,” Peter shrugged. “And since I’m being the girl, d’you think Cadance’d let me borrow one of her dresses and a tube of lipstick?”

“Sure, ask her about the Holland and Oaks dress. She’s protective of it, but I’m sure it’d go lovely with your eyes,” Shining said before growing serious. “But in regards to the undercover work, go out tonight, have fun, and think about it when you go to bed tonight, then come back here in a few days once you’ve made your mind up, okay?”

“Yeah, sure,” Peter nodded. “I’ll do that.”

Setup For Actual Content

Peter knocked on the door of MJ’s apartment, stepping back and waiting for the door to open. It did so after a moment, revealing a towel-wrapped Mary-Jane with her wet hair tied up in a ponytail and a toothbrush in her mouth.

“D’you always answer the door when you’re in a towel?” Peter asked with a raised eyebrow.

“Only if whoever’s knocking is cute,” Mary-Jane winked, stepping back into the room. “C’mon in, Tiger.”

“Thanks,” Peter said, walking into the apartment and closing the door behind him. Being back within the apartment, he spotted a few things he noticed before and a few new things he hadn't the last time.

The old consisted of: the photos of MJ and her family, the TV, the shelves.

And the new consisted of: a new photo on the wall of MJ and another red headed woman that looked a lot like MJ but was too young to be her mother, a PS4 connected to the aforementioned TV, a new lamp on the table by the door, and, most importantly, how amazing MJ’s ass looked in a wet towel. Peter never admitted he was an outright sexpest but that apple bottom ass on the other side of the room was quickly making him lose all ability to think straight.

“Damn, she’d make Felicia jealous with that thing,” he said with a smirk.

“Make yourself comfortable Peter, you can go on the PS4 if you want. Just don't start a new run on the Binding of Isaac, I’m really deep in my mom’s womb and I don't wanna have to fight my way back in there again.”

“It's a good job I know what you're talking about, MJ,” Peter chuckled. “I think any other guy would've run for the hills after hearing that statement.”

MJ laughed from the other room and Peter took a seat on the couch, booting up the PlayStation by hitting the home button on the controller and turning the TV on with the remote, the unfamiliar U.I and annoying menu music shocking him, only to have his new experience slightly marred by the name of MJ’s account.

“Harry Bualls?” Peter asked with a smirk. “Well, no one ever accused Miss Watson of being a mature lady, did they?”

After going on the account and browsing through some of the games he noticed a download version of Hatoful Boyfriend, blinking blankly before scrolling past it. He found several other downloaded games, ranging from indie games to disappointing triple A titles before settling on a favourite: The Witcher 3.

“Awesome,” Peter said with a smirk. “Girl’s got good taste, though that does make me wonder why she's dating me.”

“Not a date!” MJ called out from the other room.

“Sorry!” He responded, starting the game and sitting through the overly long loading screens.

“Y’know something I never understood about that game?” MJ asked from behind him, now sporting an all black outfit consisting of skinny jeans, T-shirt, and a jacket, eyes locked onto her pockets as she stuffed her phone into them.

“What?” Peter asked.

“It takes just as long, if not longer, for the game to load as Just Cause 2 did on a last gen console which was over ten times bigger than it, why is that?” She asked, looking at her hair in the mirror and making an unsatisfied growling noise.

“I think it's down to the fact that Just Cause isn't as good looking and the terrain isn't as detailed as the Witcher is…” Peter said before proposing an argument to his own point. “But then again, a game can look as good as it wants. Just Cause 2 had a map of three hundred miles, which a while to load no matter how good the game looks. But with The Witcher, it had a lot of unique areas, landmarks, and monsters to generate while it loads, whereas Just Cause might as well be called “Asset Reuse: The Game” with how many original different models it has in it. It has maybe four different enemy types, constantly uses the same buildings and vehicles no matter where it is in the map, and keeps the density of its greenery to a low level to keep the loading down.”

“Swings and roundabouts, then?” MJ asked, having lost patience with her hair and merely put it into a high ponytail, thickened it up, grabbed two bobbles from her make up bag, and tied two bangs of hair to hang over the fronts of her ears, turning to Peter with her arms spread.

“How do I look?” She asked with a smile. “Be honest.”

“Like a red-headed Samus Aran in casual wear,” Peter answered honestly, finding no better comparison.

“Awww, thank you,” MJ grinned, taking her key out of her pocket and twirling it on her finger. “It’s great to know I can look as hot as her without putting any effort into it.”

“What d'you mean?” Peter asked with a cocked eyebrow. “Are you not all made up right now?”

“Not even close, honey. Right now, I've only got on a basic foundation, lipstick, lacking a second layer of gloss mind you, no eyeshadow, no blusher, a fingertip’s worth of concealer, and half a pack of mints to keep me fresh,” MJ explained, counting each item on her fingers. “I didn't apply them in that order, by the way. That'd be a terrible end result.”

“Wait… that's not considered effort?” Peter asked in horror.

“Honey, at the age of fifteen, most women are able to slap all of that on in a matter of minutes. I didn't even mention using hair supplies, ranging from hair mousse, thickening shampoos, texturing gum, but only for flatter hairstyles, blowdrying with curlers, or a paddle brush or a comb, those three things getting different effects, the first two being quite similar but curlers are usually used for longer hairstyles with over the shoulder bangs, whereas the paddle brush used to get wavier patterns in waxed or gummed hair or for, with different movements, lifting shorter hair into a style like yours. Basically, I did the minimum amount to be socially acceptable to other women and feel pretty myself, while finding the happy medium between attractiveness and time spent achieving it.”

Peter stared at MJ for a long moment of silence, the sound of the clock somewhere in the room marking the seconds of brain death Peter endured.

“What?” He asked.

“Do I look pretty?”

“Yes.”

“Did it take forever?”

“No.”

“Did you like that fact?”

“Yes.”

“Would you rather have mildly attractive and short time or stunningly beautiful and long time?”

“Aren't we already at the second one?”

“Long time?”

“No, the other one?”

“Stunningly beautiful?”

“Yes.”

“You think I'm beautiful now?”

“I always do.”

“Awww… how gay.”

“Can we go now?”

“Sure thing.”

The two made their way towards the door before Peter spotted the picture of MJ and the other woman again, deciding now was a good time to ask.

“Hey, MJ?” Peter asked.

“Eeyes?” MJ asked in response, turning around to face him.

“That picture on the wall up there,” Peter said, pointing at it with his thumb. “Who's the other girl?”

“Oh, that's my older sister, Jennifer,” she answered.

“Huh, how old is she?” Peter asked.

“She's turning twenty six this year,” MJ responded. “She's been thinking of moving to New York for the past few years, but it's really expensive to get any kind of apartment in this city, so she's not sure about it.”

“Where does she live now?” Peter asked, stuffing his hands into his pockets.

“San Francisco,” she said. “She doesn't like it very much.”

“Fair enough,” Peter shrugged. “Ready to bounce then?”

“Of course,” she nodded. “I think I picked out a good movie for us today.”

“Care to share?”

“No.”

“That's not a good sign”

“No, it really isn't, is it?”

The sinister grin MJ had on her face at this point told Peter that she'd planned something evil for him.

And that made him very scared.

A Biblical Tale

“Mr Osborn,” Hammerhead said, drumming his fingers on the desk he sat behind, looking up at the impatient business man. “I've been expecting you.”

Osborn sighed loudly, turning on the lights and bathing the office in a brilliant glow. He set down his briefcase and walked over to the desk, taking a seat on the scotch cabinet and folding his arms.

“Very nice, Hammerhead,” he chuckled. “Tell me, how long have you been sitting at my desk waiting for me?”

“More time than I'd like to admit,” he shrugged, standing up straight. “Now, the Big Man’s sent me here to have a word with you.”

“Well then,” Osborn nodded.”Care for a drink? Before the death threat, that is?””

“Why thank you,” Hammerhead nodded with a smirk. “You're awfully calm about this.”

“Trust me, I've had nothing but threats all month. Either investors threatening to pull funding from the Oz formula or board members threatening to combine their shares and take over if I don’t show results in the two projects left behind by our dearly departed Richard Parker.” Osborn sighed, pouring scotch into two glasses and placing another on the edge of the cabinet for Hammerhead to take. “My old friend left a replica of the super soldier serum, as well as leaving his cross-species research practically complete, both of which I'm extremely grateful for.”

“Before I ask about the other things,” Hammerhead said, taking his glass and sipping from it. “What's with the name “Oz”? Is that like the wizard?”

“Yes, actually,” Osborn smirked, swilling his drink around to let it breathe. “And much like the wizard, it acts as nothing more than a barrage of smoke and mirrors to hide what it really is.”

“Which would be?” Hammerhead asked.

“To put it bluntly?” Osborn chuckled. “Cloning.”

“Though with the whole charade you're putting on, it’s not as simple as nuclei swapping?” He asked.

“Correct. Think of it more as the Star Wars kind of cloning,” Osborn answered. “I'm able to take a genetic sample from a certain person, be it hair, saliva, or blood, and use that and a mixture of unspecialized cells, mostly stem for now, and use the genetic sample to copy the genetic code into the stem cells and allow them to develop and grow into a duplicate of the donor.”

“And who did you have in mind?” Hammerhead asked.

“Why, our Friendly Neighbourhood Spider-Man, of course,” Osborn answered, sipping from his scotch. “No better man to kill Spider-Man than himself… or, technically, his brother.”

“That… that reminds me of a story I read in school once,” Hammerhead said, downing his scotch and exhaling in relief. “Can't remember what it was called, though.”

“That story you read was most probably an excerpt from the Bible, Hammerhead,” Osborn responded. “And the story in question? A tale of betrayal between two brothers that lead to the brutal murder of the sibling who tried to do good. If I'm honest, there could be no better a comparison than Cain and Abel, don't you agree?”

“Indeed I do,” Hammerhead chuckled. “So, should I tell the Big Man you've got this covered?”

“Yes, do just that,” Osborn nodded. “The project will take some time to complete, so until then I'll be creating decoys for Spider-Man to fend off, mostly to keep him distracted and to also test the limits of his abilities, and tweak our clone’s abilities to outmatch him in every single way.”

“I look forward to seeing this,” Hammerhead grinned.

“As do I,” Osborn said, sipping his scotch again. “As do I.”

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