"Ugh...  Ah can't believe Granny had us scrub the floors again!"  Applejack groaned as she entered the barn.  She'd been doing chores all day, and wound up cleaning the same spot in the house for the last two hours.  Granny Smith was going more than a little senile, and so she actually started repeating things on her to do lists; the worst part was when she enforced them later.

"Eeyup."  Big Mac agreed.  The heavy, exhausted baritone of his voice communicated to Applejack his exact emotions; worn out, tired, and ready to drop like a sack of potatoes.

"Seriously...  Next time remind me to get Apple Bloom surfin' through the family album with her.  That always keeps the old bat busy for a few hours."  Applejack said with a chuckle.  She and Big Macintosh deftly climbed the ladder into the upper portions of the barn, and slid into a small fort they had built with old hay bales.  The bales hid the space completely from anypony but those that knew about it, and also provided a nice spot to sit on.  Big Mac used his muscular head and neck to push forward the stack of hay blocking the entrance to their hidey hole, let his sister join him, and then replaced them with an expert kick from one of his powerful hind legs.  

"D'aww, Mac, y'didn't haveta take me for a roll in the hay y'know."  Applejack teased.  She always laughed at the way incest jokes made her brother blush.  Though she had to get him really off guard to actually see it through his bright red coat.  If she could manage it, however that always scored her extra sister-points.  Big Mac blinked and shook his head, forced a grin, and tried not to appear embarrassed.  His sister, not one to give up so easily, just kept on teasing.  "What're you gonna do?"  She smiled and rolled over onto her stomach on one bale of hay, showing off her muscular figure to him rather lewdly.  "Gonna whip it out, huh?"

"Oh keep yer panties on."  Mac said, his cheeks burning at the idea.  "I gotta find it first."

"Psh, that's the first time Ah've ever heard you say that."  Applejack flicked her tail at him, but he was out of range.  Big Mac dug around behind another hay bale, and used his teeth to drag out a heavy footlocker by one handle.  "Mmmm, mmm.  Just what Ah've been waitin' for all day.  Go on, take it out, you know you wanna~"  AJ's voice trailed off at the end of her speech; something she emulated from Rarity as an exaggerated and over-the-top method of communicating attraction.  Big Mac opened the locker and reached his head in, and sounded like he was having trouble getting his teeth around something.  "Aww what's the matter Big fella?  Havin' trouble fittin' it in yer mouth?"  Applejack couldn't help but laugh at her own joke.  "Need mah help before it's presentable~?"

After a great deal of teasing, and some frustration, Big Mac pulled the device out of the locker, an enormous red bong with his cutie mark emblazoned in the side; a gift from an old stoner marefriend who was into glassblowing.

"Awww yeah, that's the big ol' shaft Ah wanted to see!"  Applejack exclaimed, shifting from lewd incestuous teasing to actual excitement over the situation, though slowly.  Big Mac hadn't said a word the entire time because he knew AJ would pick up on his stuttering voice.  He was just hoping that the blush in his cheeks was mild enough that she wouldn't see.  That was not the case.  "Hah!  Ah knew Ah could getcha'!  Ah always do~"

Big Mac smiled at his sister, poured fresh water from the watering can hanging above them into the bong, and then produced a pre-packed bowl from the footlocker.  "Shut up and suck on this, AJ."  He said, and gave his sister the first hit.  She smirked and pressed her lips against the tip, made sure they made a perfect seal, and winked at her brother.  Big Mac, meanwhile, pulled out a candle and some matches from the locker, lit the candle, and used the long wick to light the bong without getting any wax into the weed.  Applejack white-walled the three foot tube and then signaled for her brother to remove the bowl.  With expert precision, the entire chamber emptied itself into Applejack's throat; filling her lungs with thick white smoke.  She immediately blushed and sat back on the hay, held the hit, and let it out in a cloud that instantly hot-boxed their little private hay-room.

"Talk about hittin' the spot~"  She said with a rasp in her voice.  Big Mac meanwhile had started taking his own hit with the cherry that AJ had left for him.  He was tall enough to actually reach the bowl, unlike AJ, but it was usually too big of a piece for him and him alone.  He only filled it to a somewhat opaque consistency, as he liked warm-up hits before rippin' the hell out of it.

A few seconds went by, and then Big Macintosh let out a long, deep, "Eeeeeyup," with smoke pouring from his mouth the whole way.  Applejack burst out laughing when he did this, and took her next hit when she calmed down.  Big Mac helped her as usual and sat back, the pair stared up at the ceiling and watched the candlelight dance through the smoke for a few minutes.  

"Hey... Mac...  Why is it that you only ever say "Eyup" when other people are around?"  Applejack asked, perfectly mimicking her brother's voice when she pronounced his trademark.

"Cuz I don't like talkin' to people."  He replied.

"But ya like talkin' to me?"  She said, and pawed at the bong for another hit.  Big Mac lit and removed the bowl again for her, always loving to feel useful, even in moments like this.

"Yer mah sister, AJ.  'Course ah like talkin' to you.  Even if you do seem to think waaaaay too much about bangin' me sometimes."  It was his turn to get her back, and she was so lost in the sweet sentiment that her guard was completely lowered for that one.

Applejack nearly choked on her hit, and hacked all the smoke out while Big Mac sat back and laughed at her.  The forceful coughing, however, did function to get Applejack even higher than the hit would have normally.  "Aww crap...  Ya got me, bro.  Woah..."

"You okay, AJ?"  Big Mac asked, still smirking and following up his brotherly victory with a massive hit.

"Yeah...  Ah just feel like mah head's stuffed fulla hay."

"Y'ever stop to think maybe it is?"  Big Mac smirked and said this through his hit, his voice cracking and raspy and blowing smoke out of his mouth and nostrils as he spoke.  He then offered the bong to AJ but she passed.

"Once or twice...  Then Ah remembered that you're mah brother who got all the brawn while Ah got all the brains."

"Need Ah remind ya of a little thing you called 'fancy mathematics' AJ?"

"Oh you hush up!  Ah was tired from workin' all-nighters all dern week."  Applejack sat forward to emphasize her speech, and then flopped non-threateningly back down onto the hay bale chair she and her brother had constructed.  Big Macintosh handed the bong over to her and she took another complete white-wall hit of the big red piece; Big Macintosh's ex marefriend who had made it named it "Mac Daddy."

"Oh by the princess I love how this thing hits~"  Applejack said.  The oddly phrased statement and copious amounts of marijuana in their blood was enough to spur a fit of laughter between the two.

"Yeah, it's got a real strong hoof, don't it?"

"Quit talkin' like that pipe is a pimp."

"But the pipe is a pimp, it's mah pimp pipe."

Applejack wanted to call her brother an "idjit" but she was way too high to keep from laughing long enough to say the single word.

Big Macintosh, however, held his composure just as stoically as he usually did, which only added to the absurdity and goofiness as far as AJ was concerned.  "Look, we've even got the same tattoo on our ass."  Big Mac's composure did, however, start to crack by this ending statement.  The corners of his mouth twisted back into a smile, no matter how badly he fought.  Applejack, however, had already completely lost it, and literally fell off her block of hay laughing so hard.  Big Mac set the bong down behind the hay bale next to him and leaned against the one behind him.  He slid to the floor, but was so large that his rear hooves reached all the way to the opposite wall of their narrow smoke-fort.  Applejack sprawled across his legs and used them for support, resting her head on a jutting hay bale, and turned her head to look him in the eyes.

"Howdy big brother."  She said with an exaggerated southern twang, still snickering.

Big Mac just smiled and rested his head.  The exhaustion of the day had caught up to both of them, and they had gotten so relaxed that they could barely move.  The pot didn't help either.

Just then, a grumbling voice was heard behind the pair, as the bales of hay blocking their entrance were slowly pulled out.  Granny Smith stood at the other side and stepped into the room with a stern look on her weathered face.  

"Haaaaaaaay, Granny."  Applejack said, a massive grin slowly creeping across her face at the horrid pun.

The old green mare instantly started coughing as soon as she smelled smoke.  "Oh goodness!  Thurs a fire in here!"

Applejack, knowing that they'd been caught no matter what just decided to continue her great record of honesty.  "Granny, there ain't no fire, Mac n' Ah are smokin' weed up here.  Want a hit?"

Granny looked down at Applejack's big grin and pink, glassy eyes, then up to Big Macintosh's.  He just shrugged and held out the enormous bong.  For a second, there was so much tension (and smoke) in the air that you could cut it with a knife, but then something the siblings would never forget for the rest of their lives happened.

"Eh, what the hay.  Give it here, Sonny."  She spat out her teeth and pressed her deflated mouth to the end of the bong.  Big Macintosh instinctively held the candle out to light it, not really realizing that he was doing so.  Granny pulled and pulled, filled the chamber to the top with opaque white smoke, but she kept breathing.  Her cheeks inflated, and filled all the extra room from missing teeth with just that much more smoke.  She cleared the bong herself, showing more dexterity in her body than she normally fronted, and held the hit a while.  Then that while turned to nearly two full minutes.  By the time Granny Smith exhaled, there wasn't even any smoke left.  

"Hooooo Doggy!  That's some quality cannabis you kids got."

"Holy horseapples, Granny.  Ah didn't know you partook!"  Applejack said after regaining the courage to speak.

"Psh, you kiddin'?  Y'think it's easy runnin' a farm when you can't lift a pitchfork anymore?  Plus you try knitting five hundred pairs of socks for you and all yer kin sober."

"Ah was so worried you were gonna be pissed when you opened that door, Granny."  Big Mac said, the smile returning to his big, heavy face.

"Hah, 'bout this?"  She said and pointed to the enormous pipe.  "Nawh, Ah was high this afternoon when I made you clean the floor for two hours.  Ah just didn't think y'all would approve, so Ah had to pretend Ah's goin' senile.  Honestly Ah was just afraid you two were rollin' in this here hay.  That's why ah came up here.  I don't want no slackjawed inbred grandkids, y'hear?"  Granny Smith took another hit and sat down on the hay bale after she spoke.

Applejack and Big Macintosh both blushed intensely and looked at each other, then back at Granny Smith.  They simultaneously grinned said the only thing they could think of at that moment.

"Eeeeeyup."