It's not that I was so tense that I felt like anything I did would've resulted in some damage to myself, it was the fact that I know the one holding this knife can put out so much that magic would be virtually useless in trying to 'grow' it back. And that's something I'm not willing to wager or find out. So I remained calm and quiet as Shining stood over me with a grimace, holding a knife to my dick.

I guess I should've taken Mel's warning a little more seriously.

"Shining, I know you're upset. But can I please get a word in?" I quietly asked.

His face then turned to confusion as he tilted one of his ears to my direction. "I'm sorry, I can't hear you over the music. You said you wanna start singing?"

"I SAID LET ME TALK TO YOU, DAMMIT!" I screamed, temporarily falling into a state of panic before I cleared my throat and corrected myself. "There's two sides to this."

"I'm well aware. But why should I care about what you say when you've put your hands on my wife?" He said vehemently. "First, you diddle around with my sister. Second, you get her in trouble. Third, the two of you break up. And lastly, you decided to go after my wife. You two might not agree with one another, but I'll be damned if you ever touch her again. You've got a lot of balls, I'm starting to think you got a little too much for your good."

"Trust me, I think I've got enough." The knife inches up to my pelvis, tapping me directly between each testicle. My toes curled up tightly as my hands balled up into fists, ready to take whatever opening I could find. The muscles in my arm tightened as I felt a strong need to punch his lights out before I suffered any further long-lasting harm. I looked at him as he stared at me cautiously. The whole situation turned into a Mexican standoff between me and him, one I wasn't going to lose.

"Annnnnnnd... SCENE!" Blueblood shouted out, causing me to flinch a bit.

Shining retracted the blade and quickly started laughing. Meanwhile, I was too busy trying to catch up on the much needed oxygen I deprived myself of for the past thirty seconds. While Blueblood started to laugh as well, Shining slapped my shoulder and sat beside me. "Ah, you should've seen the look on your face... OH WAIT, I GOT IT!"

Shining then pulled out his phone and started showing me some playback of what occurred just moments ago. Obviously I was tense as hell, but I didn't imagine that I'd look like my life was on the line, like I was genuinely scared. But that's how it looks in the eye of an indiscriminate source. The stallion not only prided himself in his ability to use human technology, but also getting me to buy into one of the biggest feints he ever pulled.

I shook my head angrily. "You're about to lose so many teeth."

Blueblood finished laughing as he waved at Fleetfoot. "Okay you two, settle down. We've got other things to plan aside from childish pranks."

That 'childish prank' was going to have some very adult responses if it had gone on any longer. Needless to say I was not amused. The two stallions settled down and then started their conversation. "Well now that phase one has shown more than it's fair share of fruit, I suppose we should start gathering our resources and move on to phase two." Blueblood said.

Shining, who was still messing with his phone, responded. "I'm hoping that Cadie has less of a role in this one."

"Only the fact that she needs to continue disliking our curious friend here."

"Should I also show some public animosity as well, to make things seem more convincing?" Shining asked.

"If anything, that would be perfect. The two of you have had more than one feud so it would be more than believable if it were to continue in the eye of the public. After all, I'm sure he'd agree that your previous performance was nothing short of award-winning."

I turned to Shining. "Now correct me if I'm wrong, but did you just say that you were in on this?"

"If I wasn't, I would've came after you in your sleep." He bluntly explained. "You know what I can do."

Yeah, I've seen it for myself in gory detail. And then there's the whole 'unicorn capable of using a gun' thing that could easily get me killed. I definitely need to watch my ass going forward. "Well if anything, I'd like to apologize to you because I know that's kinda crossing the line in the 'man-code' thing. Touching another man's wife is a big no-no."

Shining shrugged and pointed his phone in the direction of the table where the two Wonderbolts were giving much of the audience a show. "You honestly think I'm heated over that? Sure I'm upset, but I know what had to be done. Touching her is still off-limits and that's a big no, but the other stuff, the arguing, the back-and-forth, I'm fine with it. Besides, she let the two of us have our outing, I think it's fair that you two should have yours."

"But don't plan on fighting her." Blueblood warned. "It's not so much of her way with a sword that'll do you in, but rather her craftiness in combat magic."

"Is she that bad?" I asked.

"How long do you think you can live while being encased in crystal?" Shining questioned. "Under most pretenses, she'd use that spell to stop her opponents, but then she's lenient enough to leave a few air holes for you to breathe through. All she'd have to do is take those away and... yeah."

"And then there's the whole summoning crystals from the ground thing, she's really good at catching you off guard with that. You'd sooner find yourself impaled than touching her again." Blueblood added. "So a 'no holds barred' would only be a definite death flag for you."

"Especially how pissed she is right now. You should've seen her in the morning a few days back, Chrysalis pissed her off when she went to interrogate her and Cadie's been nasty since. Smart thing to do is to feed the lion, but not using your own limbs." The young prince warned.

"Basically, don't talk to her directly." I clarified, earning a nod from the both of them.

"Also..." Shining continued. "I know a lot of issues between you and Twily have come on the end of Cadance suggesting some restrictions."

"As far as what I know, she's trying to play the role Celestia had with you when you were in your waiting period with Cadance." I said. "I caught wind of that when I saw Celestia chewing her out the day Twilight made our breakup public."

"We all know what happened. We were there." Blueblood said with a pout.

"Didn't you walk out on us when that happened?" Shining asked.

"Well wouldn't you show some frustration after having things laid out and set in place, only for something major to break up your initial plan? I had a process laid out for everypony, but now that's changed and there's no point in discussing it."

"So you've called us both to salvage what you had lined up." I stated as I noticed through the corner of my eye the couple on the table getting a little restless with their performance. The stallion's head was forced into the mare's haunches as her chest rose and fell quickly, her head tossed back as her back arched inwards. Her eyes shot open as she stopped moaning altogether, waiting for a few seconds before a loud grunt sounded through her teeth.

Blueblood also took notice and leaned back to enjoy the show. "Pretty much the case. Those two sure are ambitious."

Shining scoffed as he used the phone to record the two. "Hell, it'll be a while before I get any from Cadance with how out of it she's been. I might as well get some material for later tonight."

Yeah, he's definitely learned how to implement the exploitative nature of a camera phone. Thank goodness Equestria doesn't have internet. "Yeah, those two have been at it for a while. I'm just watching to see if she lets him jump her off."

"Twenty bits, she lets him but they take it to a room first." Shining said.

"Thirty says they won't make it out the room." I said.

"Fifty says they'll break that table when it's all said and done." Blueblood said.

"Seventy-five says Soarin will last less than five minutes from now." The three of us looked up to the left, seeing Fleetfoot balancing three drinks on her right wing. She slanted her wing, allowing the three glasses of whiskey to slide onto the table. After, she grabbed her own drink and slid herself between me and Blueblood. From there, she leaned up on the chair and smiled. "I expect my money before you guys leave the hotel."

"I don't have any money on me." I pointed out.

She didn't seem bothered by my confession, only taking a sip from her glass. "I know you're broke. That's why I got something else planned for you if you lose."

"What's that? Scrub the toilets, mess hall duty, guard watch for six hours in a dark hallway?"

The mare looked up at me and tapped me on my side. "Let's just say that Spits put me on to you. Ever since she told me that story of you in Arimaspi Mountain, I knew I wanted to see just how much you can handle."

...Oh no, not this again. "And this is Spitfire's idea?"

"You, me, Spits, ten minutes each."

I looked back to Shining, trying to change the subject. "So, about this plan, what's up next?"

Fleetfoot interjected in his place. "You're gonna want some favor with the higher ups of the ranks. And I mean more than just him. You've got a lot of seasoned minds and peppered manes wondering how the hell you qualify for the position."

"Yet no one assigned to my units die." I argued. "That seems like an unfair assessment."

"You'd think that, right? But here's the thing." She went on to explain. "All of the ones who call foul are the main ones who secretly buddy up with members of the parliament in promise of some political doors to open for them. And you already know that we don't get paid nearly enough other than a moderate yearly wage."

"But these guys at the top should be loaded, right?" I asked. "They've been around for years, they've got the rank to match the paycheck."

"But after retirement, which happens in the late-thirties to mid-forties, what's next?" She asked. "If anything, you're just as good as some bum on the street in the grand scheme of things. It's even worse when you've spent over thirty to forty years of service to crown and country, only to leave and get nothing out of it other than a few shiny medals and a hard time trying to fit back in to civilian society."

That's the least of their worries if they've been through some nasty situations like I've been in. It's a valid point of concern and I can not only speak from the experience of going through it myself, but also from watching my grandfather suffer through his PTSD. And if there's no structure in place for those leaving the service, then it's hard to pick back up where you left off before enlisting. It's becomes a strange world. "No doubt that's a hard thing to do. But why take it out on me?"

"Because they want a landing spot for when they get out." Blueblood stated taking a sip of his drink. "They want some place to belong. And if they play favors with the ruling party, they'll get whatever they want. Money, power, drugs, a nice place to retire, land rights, you name it."

"Meanwhile I'm just some wet-behind-the-ears rookie. So what can I do to convince them?" I inquired.

Blueblood chuckled lightly as he stirred the content of his glass. "I'm sure the words 'I believe that we will win' will ring a bell."

"I'm sure the words 'A seven nation army couldn't hold me back' would also do a lot to grab their attention." Fleetfoot added.

Shining then added. "And you've had that monster tirade you pulled off in front of the parliament when you got back from capturing Guto and his assistant. If anything, you can find something to say that would convince them."

...Apparently my speech to the troops had gotten out by word of mouth, I'd assume. Regardless, I'm still left with a situation that brings up far more questions than solutions. "And you want me to somehow talk smoke up their ass so they'd switch teams?"

"It does seem like a good place to start, having the support of the entire E.U.P. and a few politicians." Blueblood responded casually.

I sat back in my chair and pondered on the situation. As of the moment, the only thing that's standing in my way are the politicians. And if they're insinuating that these higher-ups are just playing nice to get some extra benefits, then maybe it goes beyond Count DuMoneé. Perhaps he's got some sort of syndicate he's working with that's hard on keeping things locked in place. And if I remember correctly, Shining was sent off on a deployment similar to mine just a few years back and Count wasn't involved with that as directly as he was with me.

In short, I'd be no better off cutting off the head of a hydra. It'll be a battle of attrition on our part, we'll get our guy, they swap up, rebound, attack, and it's back to square one. If we were to direct our attention to the higher-ups trying to buddy up, then... "That's all pointless." I quietly concluded.

"Why?" Fleetfoot questioned as the others looked back at me oddly.

"Think about it. You want me to convince some guys in the higher ups to change their mind when their conservative mindsets have already been long established and their bank accounts already filled? We're not talking about 'new money' here, those guys are trying to get in where they fit in. We're talking about a bunch of guys who's been getting the support of the wealthy or influential. And these guys have been like that for a substantial amount of time, even for longer than they would've breathed on this earth."

"If you're planning on attacking the highest of the upper crust of society, then I can only sell you the bridge leading out of town." Blueblood stated.

"We don't need to go after them directly." I clarified. "Just the proxies they have in place that hold all the cards. These are individuals who have founders, backers, brokers, lobbyists, loyalists, hard assets, liquidated assets, depreciables out the wazoo, even off-shore accounts, private agents overseas, mercenaries, and votes. We're talking politicians here."

"So you're suggesting we bypass the corruption in the higher ranks?" Shining questioned.

I held up my hand and wiggled each of my fingers as I spoke. "You don't cut off someone's finger and expect them to not retaliate. I though my exercise in the garden was a way to network and find some means of getting in on the grapevine. So I tried to treat it as such. One of the city council members don't like politicians, I can start with him and his circle of business owners and entrepreneurs."

Blueblood rubbed his chin and hummed cautiously. "The thing about playing with circles is that you're going to have to get in through mutual associates. You may have been a topic of interest for that individual, but how are you going to get yourself in with the others?"

I took a sip of my drink and smiled. "That's it right there. I have one already. This guy by the name of Fancy Pants is the one other guy I can use to get in. Alabaster is the guy on city council I talked about, he and I share similar ground so I plan on using his influence to get me in a more favorable position. Whether he realizes it or not, city council is low-level politics and I can sure use some under-the-table city backing to get some dirty work done to clean up the much from the inside."

"And this Fancy Pants?" Shining questioned.

"He and I share a mutual of our own, Rarity. Happens to be that we met three months ago, before I even got in the service."

The young prince nodded with approval. "So you've got a guy in the fashion circle and another in city council. Not a bad start to give you an opportunity to get you a lobbyist or two."

Fleetfoot snickered as she waved off Shining's praise. "Grassroot politics is nice and all, but you need to start with something that's gonna have your back if you wanna take these things seriously. Say if these other parties don't agree with your direction and they decide not to fund your cause. Or in the case of some of the larger owners, they have international interests to take into account, so if word of them gets out backing some sort of underground political movement, then they're in deep shit, their business is in deep shit, and you're shit out of luck."

"You have any suggestions?" I inquired.

Fleetfoot shrugged with a light giggle. "I can't believe you didn't notice the ones that's been rallying and calling for you the entire time you've been captain. You sure need to show them a bit of love after all the things they're trying to get passed in your name. Try that 'Hooves For Humans' organization. It's a bit small, but I heard the head chair is pretty loaded."

Hooves for Humans, I know I heard that somewhere. It feels like I heard that from somebody. Oh well, not questioning it. "How much is pretty loaded?" I asked, genuinely curious.

"Loaded as in they own like twenty percent of the properties in all of Canterlot, five percent in Cloudsdale, seven percent in Manehattan and fifteen in Las Pegasus. And a lot of the property in Canterlot's notorious zones like Restaurant Row, Spa Central, Haberdasher Haven, Antique Aisle, and even some places in Cloudsdale like the illustrious Rainbow Road, if you wanna purchase or rent anything empty on the block, it's gonna have their name on it."

"That seems like a good place to start." I said, reconsidering my earlier option. "I might have to check them out first."

"But then you have to think about what they might want in return for their service." Blueblood warned. "Hooves for Humans isn't quite an organization as much as it is a fan club. You might find yourself to be in the service of some uncanny individuals. If their demands appear to be unsettling in any way, better to pull yourself out before it gets... interesting."

"I don't think it's that bad." Shining suggested. "If anything, they've been pretty defiant of the decisions politicians made to put you in compromising situations. This could actually work for you if you know how to negotiate."

Fleetfoot quickly interjected her feedback. "Oh, and to correct Prince Blueblood, they pretty much put in the work to become an organization. It's small, probably got around forty mares in it, but it's gonna get big when you get directly involved."

I turned to Fleetfoot and pointed at her mockingly. "You seem like you'd wanna join up with them yourself."

"Well lets just say that I've been to a meet-up or two." She answered with a shrug. "You get in on this, and you're gonna get some pretty big bucks."

If there's a thing I can learn from my world, having a major property owner backing your cause in any movement is going to get you much further than a march down the street with a few random supporters, gaining a supposedly sympathetic 'We hear your pain' speech from a politician who's special interests only lies in the money. If this is my quickest route for funding, then I can't really refuse. "I'm in."

Fleetfoot smiled brightly as she nudged me in the side with her wing. "I knew you'd be smart about something."

"Well I do have my moments." I said, not ignoring her shaded insult. "Now in what way am I not smart?"

Shining snorted as he held a hoof over his muzzle and looked to the side. Blueblood replicated the action and looked to the opposite side. Fleetfoot continued to smile a bit before a loud smack caught all of us off guard.

"I SAID NO, ASSHOLE!"

Our eyes turned to the two Wonderbolts on the table. While Soarin was holding his cheek, the mare shoved him off and angrily slid off the tabletop. The stallion then retorted. "Can you at least pay me for the bet?"

"Check in the mail, now fuck off!" She hollered, pushing her way past the turgid stallion.

"C'mon, you can't leave me like this." He pleaded desperately, trying to walk beside her. "I gotta get something."

"You smell that stuff all over your face, use that for inspiration, and wing it out." She replied with a tout of her nose. "Not like you're above self-service anyways."

"Please!?" He begged, running in front of her, kissing her hooves in an attempt to find some form of relief.

She then knocked his head back, causing him to fall onto his back. With his limp hooves, he looked at the mare standing above him with a scowl on her face. She gritted her teeth with disgust as she unfurled one of her wings and folded the feathers with the exception of her most prominent one. She noticed the stallion had already flared tremendously, his length throbbing against his stomach. Her feather planted in between his two swollen dark orbs and slowly traced up the center. The stallion grimaced as her feather moved agonizingly slow up until halfway. Then without warning, she flicked the remainder of the stallion's girth, causing him to grunt loudly. While he was heaving enormous breaths under pressure, she looked ahead and walked over him while whispering. "You are disgusting."

The stallion laid on the ground while the mare walked out of the room, feeling more than satisfied with what she received and also annoyed by the individual she left behind. The stallion then let out a small whimper as his mast stood on it's own, twitching once before a thin stream of his seed cascaded onto his stomach. With a last-ditch effort to savor his peak, he summoned both hooves to task, stroking himself as the river of seed coated his stomach and much of the floor he laid on.

Although his release was achieved, his efforts to break the plane of climax fell short. And it showed in his motions that he was unsatisfied, he was quick to remove himself from the ground afterwards and showed a look of defeat. His eyes looked at the white puddle slowly soaking into the carpet as others at the bar called out to him.

"Hey Soarin, I heard some chicks in the Lower are running the block tonight." One heckled.

"Maybe they can get you off right this time." Another joined in.

The bartender soon joined in the fun. "Hey, how's bout a drink on me!? One 'Sex-on-my-Face' cumming right up!"

"FUCK ALL OF YOU!" The stallion shouted as he quickly stormed out of the room covered in his own seed. The room erupted with laughter as the doors closed once more.

The four of us were sitting in the corner giggling like the rest as Blueblood wiped a tear from his eye. "I pity him, at least I know when to quit."

"I wonder who's cleaning up after that. That's gotta be hard to remove all the way." Shining said with a chuckle.

"All I know is I'm not stepping in that." I stated strongly.

Fleetfoot placed a feather on my chin as she snarkily replied. "I know this much, that was a grand total of three-minutes and forty-seven seconds from the time we made our bets. And he's busted a pretty terrible one, but it's a bust regardless. Pay up, boys."

Both royal princes rolled their eyes as they summoned their pouches and started counting out the bits. I could only plant my hand over my face as she collected her dues. After they finished with the payout, she stood on the table proudly and smirked just inches away from my face.

"Now... about your payout options."

With much of our briefing out of the way, Fleetfoot didn't bother wasting any time with getting me out of the V.I.P. lounge. She did run me into a few of her acquaintances and cadets before dragging me up to the top floor of the hotel. After unlocking the door, shoving me through, putting a 'do-not-disturb' notice on the knob, and closing the door, she pounced on my chest with the intention of driving me to the ground. Though I stumbled terribly to keep my balance, I only managed to plant my back against the wall.

She, however, was more than eager to get me in a more compromising situation. While I tried my best to keep her from getting to frisky, I tried to get her to calm down, even changing the subject to long-winded discussions of nothing to distract her overboiled sex drive from getting the better of her, and me for that matter.

"Fuck, you humans are strong as hell." She said as she grabbed my shirt, trying to drive me to the ground again.

"I'm only as strong as Celestia's passion to... uh... indulge in ice cream?" As you can tell, I'm not very good at trying to diffuse a ticking sex bomb. Still doesn't stop me from trying to find a way to shut this thing down. "Yeah, so I like ice cream. What kind do you like?"

"Any of a nut variety." She replied eagerly.

That was a bad topic, let's try something else. "So I heard about the things that are implied by a cutie mark. We humans don't have anything like that in our world, so would you carefully explain in a twelve-page essay how this concept came to be and how it's applied in modern society?"

"Oh, so you like roleplaying, huh?" She inquired, trying to do whatever she could to take my shirt off. "I don't mind being your tiny little pony student."

Fuck, I thought taking Twilight's boring method of learning would try to drag her down. I know what else I can try. "So, what's up with Soarin? It seems like he's the hot topic of debate around you guys."

"He has a weird fetish for degrading himself to nothing more than a lesser being. Spits seem to got him locked in that shit after one night with her." She simply explained as she fumbled around with the buttons on my shirt.

"So you mean to tell me that shit he just got through doing on the ground, he actually likes that shit!?"

She shook her head. "Nah, he's into the whole busting-a-nut-in-mares-without-contraceptives thing. Gotten himself caught up three times already by some local mares around here."

If those three are who I think they are... "Oh... Small world."

"I swear if I could get a bit for every time he told some poor mare 'I can pull out in time, trust me, I know what I'm doing', then I'd be retired."

Well I'm glad we've hit a topic of ire, now we can expand on it. "Holy hell, he must've gotten so many mares pregnant."

"Hey, can you get a mare pregnant?"

So much for swapping the subject to a topic of ire. Might as well lie. "Oh, please! I get mares pregnant like crazy. My hormones are so wild that I knock up dragons!" I lied through my teeth. "We're talking quadruplets, quintuplets, whole litters. If you had two humans of the different sexes, you'd be dealing with an infestation!"

A sinister smile cranked her cheeks high up on her face as she leaned against me. "That must mean you've got spunk for weeks. Oh I can't wait till estrous season, then you can fuck me full of fillies!"

That went nowhere, I've seen perpendicular nosedives go further than that. Maybe I need to cut the crap and man up. "Lady, look. With all things considered─"

"So where do you humans hide your junk!? You're always wearing clothes, just adds to the mystery honestly, like why is your species so damn provocative!?"

"I'm not interested." I bluntly called out, but to little success.

"You lost a bet, so now you've gotta up and give me what I wa─"

I emphasized my point by grabbing her muzzle and pulling her down to where I could butt heads with the mare. "My. Dick's. Not. For. Sale."

While she still smelled strongly of whiskey and musk, I could see the drastic change in her mood. Her eyes shimmered for a second before they turned away, appearing upset. "...So that's what you're gonna tell them?"

"Tell who what?" I asked.

The mare sighed as she climbed off of me, rolling her eyes as she used my chest to support her ascent. "...Look. You're in a position to get whatever you want. And you ain't got no change to be giving out either. If I were you, I'd stop being a total virgin and get with the program."

I politely moved her hoof off of my chest before she left an imprint under my shirt. "I'll say it again, my dick ain't for discussion."

"Well you better drop that idea or you won't be getting paid." She warned, tapping me on the nose. "These are the higher ups of Canterlot's social and financial hierarchy. If you ain't dancing for them, you ain't getting no coin."

"So this Hooves for Humans thing is a bunch of mares looking to get their jungle fever looked at, am I right?" I questioned, still feeling the mare's hoof pressed slightly against my nose.

"They've gone to bat for your kind more than once already. And with the past few weeks, you've been getting a hot stream of donations from their inner circle to help mitigate the cost of your medical expenses. Ignoring them is a quick way of losing your only road to achieving your agenda."

"And you think I can't get a train back to Arimaspi Mountain to drag some gold back for that same reason?" I asked as I folded my arms.

"That's cute if you think you can do a trip like that twice." She rebutted.

"I've been there, grabbed the goods, and came back twice as it is. What's gonna stop me on a third visit?"

She laughed condescendingly at my statement. "So you getting hospitalized ain't enough for you to understand that a third visit in unmarred territory is gonna kill you? You think that you can go solo on a full combat operation just a few days out of the hospital? I didn't think you were that stupid."

"So what am I supposed to do? Lay on my back and just take it?"

The mare shrugged as a knock sounded at the door. She spoke as she walked towards the door. "What's cheaper than sex?" When she cracked the door open, a stallion appeared with a bottle of champagne leaning in a bucket of ice. Quickly, she grabbed the items, gave him a tip, and slammed the door behind her. Then she focused her attention back to me. "I think you're looking at this from the wrong direction. I get you wanna save yourself for your princess..." Her statement was followed with a scoff. "Which I think is ridiculous, cause if she was so in love with you, she'd let you rut every mare you'd meet, knowing it was gonna be a long wait for you, and it would've been fairer on your end if she didn't have any issues with you getting a night or two with some other mare to pull some of that stress off of you, but that's none of my business."

I merely tilted my head with an unamused expression as she veered off topic.

"Where was I?" She questioned briefly before snapping back on subject. "Oh yeah, the sex thing. Look, you ain't gotta sit in no chair, bound and gagged against your will, waiting for some crazy bitch to slit your throat with a knife just so she can bathe in your blood while she masturbates."

"I'm not feeling convinced by any metric at this point." I quietly deadpanned.

"But if you think about it, giving them the goods is what could give them a new lease on life, a whole new unexpected chapter to a story long written and long drawn out. You'd be better off just offering the sex for the cause."

I shook my head as I strongly responded. "I'm not interested. First you had my attention when you said this person owned x-amount of property. But now I'm more or less willing to try things at my own pace."

"Your pace will take months, almost years." She responded. "If you were all-in for this cause like you say you are, you'd take the quickest way."

"I'm not really trying to prostitute myself like this. I get it, I'm a hot commodity, but I should be worth more than that." I responded.

"A piece of you would go for an actual twenty-thousand bits easy, if you wanna be literal." She said, causing me to do a double take at her. "I mean your arm's probably a good several hundred thousand, your leg is short of a million, your brain is probably a cool ten million in good condition. But that's according to the markers down in the southern quadrant. And then we're not even talking about the resale market to scientific researchers on the low."

If I didn't feel like taking a piss earlier, I sure as hell did now. "I'm sorry... what?"

"The whole head is around five million for every pound. Lots of dark magic practitioners who'd be more than interested in getting some company on those quiet, lonely nights of not trying to reanimate corpses."

...Um... "Excuse me, whaaaaaaaaa─"

"It's safe to say Hooves for Humans aren't looking to do any of that. And if anything, they're looking at some laws regarding some basic protections for your species beyond being a 'protected species'." She finished.

I took a deep breath and asked her again. "So they're trying to help me, without my interference already. Wouldn't they do this as well?"

"Not if it benefits the princesses, who they're not a fan of since you were announced to be engaged. I'm sure their fandom of them is not so good either, you know with the public breakup and all."

And taking into consideration a recent confrontation I had with Cadance, it wouldn't be surprising if they didn't want anything to do with that. But I'm still gonna try to at least get a few bits... I'm just worried that this will lead to some strange prostitution ring. "If I consider a meeting with these ponies, can it be assured that this will go no further than a day at the park or something?"

"I'm sure it won't be anything more than some setup for the estrus season, which to us mares is payment and a half. At least you'll have a whole eight months to disappear before that happens."

I'm not one who usually goes back on my word, but if it's to avoid some raunchy business with a group of overstimulated strangers capable of magically altering anything on my body, I would take my chances. "Tell you what, I can think about that now that you've given me a loophole. But I'm not really looking to do anything like that until I am ready." As if I'll ever be.

"Sweet!" She called out while pumping a hoof in excitement. "Now, we've got the wine, we've got some music going, we can cut the lights low, and you can lay on the bed and let me─"

"Masturbate while I sleep in the other room." I coldly responded. "Goodnight!"

The mare slammed her hoof into the ground as she hollered at me. "You are so FUCKED when you wake up in the morning!"

"Don't jump me, I'm celibate!" I called out before walking to one of the other rooms, closing the door, and pulling the covers over my head.

As she groaned disparagingly in the other room, I was shifting around underneath the sheets. It was never normal for me to go to sleep while fully dressed as it was rather uncomfortable, but I knew if I wanted to protect myself from any of her advances, I would have to keep them on. At least then I would be able to tell if she was getting too frisky for her own good.

Forcing myself to close my eyes, my mind recounted the recent events. A lot had ran through my mind pertaining to the possible deals I would be making with these organizations and council members to achieve my goals. But that was a fleeting topic compared to the more vivid retelling of the two ponies being so close to having sex on the table. Just the sight of her grabbing the stallion's head as she climaxed in his face, the aftermath of him writhing on the ground as he helplessly unloaded all over the floor, the advancements Fleetfoot made at me just then, the thought of her masturbating in the other room...

...Dammit, now I'm gonna be sleeping through a massive hard-on in my jeans. As if my balls aren't blue enough.

3 A.M. in the Morning...

My phone vibrating in my pockeet was the first thing that woke me up. While I was successful in forcing myself to sleep, I was not a happy camper waking up. I was grouchy, angry, frustrated both emotionally and sexually, and sweaty due to the heavy-ass clothes I slept in. It didn't help that they had the heater units running because of the season change, so I was waking up a damp rag trying to flop my way out of the suite. Didn't have time for a shower because I knew that if I had stayed any longer than I needed to, I'd run the risk of waking up Fleetfoot.

"Nnnngh..."

The sudden groan caused me to sharply turn my attention to the bed on the other side of me. As I locked my eyes onto the disheveled fiery mane sleeping in the bed next to me, the mare mumbled in her sleep. "Watch both ways when crossing the runway, rookie..."

Spitfire seemed quite peaceful while she slept, all the better motivation to get my ass moving.

With no chance to hit the showers, I smoothly climbed out of my bed. And even as I did, I ended up seeing that same mare from earlier this evening sleeping right beside me in the same bed I was in. She seemed satisfied in more ways than one, so no point in bothering. I quietly grabbed my shoes, my phone, and my other belongings and tiptoed out the door. And even as I tiptoed to the suite exit, Fleetfoot was sitting on the couch. Apparently she was passed out from drinking, and the strong musk in the air clearly indicated that she was put out by more than just the alcohol.

I wasn't gonna risk being loud, so I slowly opened the door, put all my stuff on the side in the hallway, and carefully inched the door closed until a soft click sounded. I then crept down the hall a few more doors before I slapped on my shoes and bolted for the elevator. And from there on, I was free for take-off. Out the elevator, through the lobby, out the main entrance, and past the awning, I was free from the clutches of the Wonderbolts.

But the one thing I was not ready for was the sudden breeze of the chilly November air. I was still damp from sweating earlier, so any breeze felt drastically colder than what it actually was. But I was psyching myself to brave the conditions and make my way to the castle, which was going to be a good hour-and-a-half walk from here to there.

Legs, you've got this.

Two Hours Later...

After a long and arduous walk, which felt like the Bataan Death March through the Siberian Alps, I reached my destination with barely enough feeling in my arms to get me to ignore the cold air. Pneumonia was definitely a possibility, but I believe my body would prove my brain otherwise. Not that it matters now, I'm more than willing to push my way through anything at this point, as long as it has a warm bed waiting for me at the end.

The sky started to turn light blue, the world started to slowly awaken, the birds that remained in the city chirped their greetings towards one another. And though the sun hasn't poked it's head over the horizon just yet, it was enough twilight to give me a good view of the gates. The guards that stood by hadn't even batted an eye while they lazily slumped over, trying in desperation to keep their eyes open. I didn't disturb them, I'm tired myself.

Entering into the halls of the castle, I yawned and felt myself losing some strength in my legs. Obviously my conditioning hasn't set back in yet, so that's to be expected. Should be around a week before I get moving like I used to. Maids were at work making their rounds through the castle, changing out the dead flowers for live ones, sweeping the floors, wiping the banisters, and even an entourage of musicians lined up in the halls with their instruments. It drew my attention, to say the least, as I walked over to see more about it.

The group quietly sat in place as a few of them yawned, others were running through their sheet music one last time before the conductor nodded to the group. They shortly acknowledged the maestro and trailed behind him. And in mere seconds one glanced at me, smiled brightly, trotted out of place and greeted me.

"Well if it isn't Mr. Hot-Topic himself." The gray earth pony said with a smile.

"Miss Octavia, right?" I recalled, earning an approving nod. "I haven't seen you in a while."

"As I to you. I thought that you would be in the midst of your recovery phase. I suppose those rumors of you wandering around town on your own strength was nothing to scoff at. Good to see you doing well."

"Missus Octavia!" The conductor whispered out harshly. "I trust he's helping you with your instrument!?"

Realizing I had gotten her in trouble, I quickly responded to him. "Yes sir, I'm here to carry her cello."

As I took her instrument for her, she blushed out of shame and folded her ears back in embarrassment. As we walked down the halls, I quickly noticed that we were making our way towards the residential quarters of the royal princesses. "So, what are we doing here?" I whispered.

"Oh, we are the Dawning Ensemble. Basically, we come here in the minutes before the dawn to bring forth the music to indicate the special day of one of the royals. As of now, we are currently stationed before Princess Celestia's door."

I gave her her instrument. She popped the case open and pulled out her cello, readied the bow and stared at the conductor. He brought his baton up, counted to six and the ensemble proceeded to play. The horns and cello carried the melody, while the upper strings laid a soothing foundation. As the piece went along, the strings carried the melody while the lower voices laid the counterpoint. What was a humble broad sound was then transformed into a light waltz, earning the attention of many of the residents. The door opened and out came Celestia, dressed in her usual regalia. She smiled lightly as she spoke.

"All these years and I can't find a snooze button." The joke earned quite a few giggles around the hall. "But it is nice to hear such a wonderful sound regardless."

The conductor then turned to her and bowed. "Your highness, It is truly an honor to see you grace us with your sun today, a day that very few will ever get to know. The day has begun, and another year of your being blesses us far more than we could ever hope. Happy birthday, your majesty."

She looked at the ensemble blankly for a second before it finally dawned on her. "Oh, it is my birthday."

Quiet claps sounded throughout the hall. I looked around to see the usual individuals, Shining, Blueblood, Luna, all seven of Blueblood's wives, and Cadance, each of them applauding the high princess. But when Cadance's eyes glanced over to my direction, she stopped clapping and spoke. "To my dear auntie, I wish you nothing but future happiness and more prosperity upon you and your realm. Forgive me for yet another retirement, I grow ill."

And on that note, she walked back into the room, leaving only Shining to speak. "Your highness, it is without fallacy that I'd announce how beautiful you look today." Shortly after that, a light blue aura grasped at the stallion's mane, dragging him back into the room. As soon as the door slammed behind him, Luna snickered. "I guess your adopted niece feels as if you'd steal her mate."

"Cadance is still a little under the weather, I see. Sad." Blueblood said before he walked back into his room, his wives following suit.

Luna looked at me with a smirk and turned back to her own room. "I will be returning to my quarters for some freshening up. The bath is ready, sister."

The group of musicians then dismissed themselves, Octavia included. But she gave me a playful salute before wandering off to God-knows-where. I looked at the princess and shook my head. "Huh, I didn't know it was your birthday today."

"Not many do, I'd rather keep it that way to keep it as intimate as possible. If I didn't, there would be massive feasts and huge festivals throughout the day. I'm more comfortable with the peace of being with my friends and family."

Yeah, I can see why. She just had a chamber orchestra to function as her damn alarm clock, I can safely say that her exaggerations would really be more of an understatement. "Well, happy birthday to you, princess."

She tapped her hoof as she stared at me unimpressed. "I remember you giving me a nickname. Care to use it anytime soon?"

I rolled my eyes as I started to sing to the princess. "♫Happy Birthday to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday dear Ceeellaaaaa.... Happy birthday to you. And many moooore!♪"

She still seemed unimpressed, this time walking up to me. Tracking a circle around me, she held her eyes on me before she walked directly into me. She sniffed at me a few times before looking up at me. "Your hygiene is questionable today, captain."

No surprises there. "I do apologize, this is far earlier than my usual report time. I woke up at around three and walked here. I just got here maybe around fifteen minutes ago."

"Did you not bathe?" She questioned.

"Consider it a post-workout sweat." She still seemed unimpressed, as if she knew what I was not telling her. "Okay, to be honest, I slept in these and I didn't get a chance to out of fear of a few Wonderbolts getting curious about my anatomy."

"You are awfully sour today, captain. Questionable or sub-appropriate hygiene is not becoming of a guardian such as your rank. What would your brothers say if they caught you like this? I'm sure none of your friends would stand for it."

You know, she's being awfully kind to be grilling me right now. "I understand, I will do better, your highness."

She then smiled, snickered, and broke into delightful laughter. "Oh dear, I can't get you break, can I?"

"I'm sure you would if you tried. I know what you're capable of." I said, inwardly breathing a sigh of relief. "But on the real, I'm sorry about the smell."

She gave me a tight hug, not even minding my current condition. "If anything, I just want you to understand. Meaning that we are friends won't mean that I won't correct you on your upkeep. And it is my job to inspect every guard if I notice something out of place. And if I find you're out of place, I won't hesitate to chastise you for it."

"Acknowledged." I said with a polite bow.

Suddenly, her magic swallowed my entire arm as I was about to walk away. I was then dragged into her room and into the bathroom. "And since you acknowledge your error, I will have you correct it by any means and I will have you correct it immediately. Thus..." She then threw me into the tub, clothes and all, and playfully winked at me. "Feel free to use my bath for the time being, I will get back to you once I've raised the sun."

The doors closed, leaving me in a pool of soap and exotic perfumes. As the door remained closed, I took advantage of the brief moment of privacy and stripped out of everything. Though I still felt that this is somewhat inconvenient, at the very least, I knew that my clothes weren't going to be sour anymore. I took off my shirt, my shoes, my socks, my pants, and finally my boxers when suddenly...

"Well well... My birthday isn't until June, but I do accept this wonderful gift." I yanked my boxers back into the tub, as I quickly turned around to see Princess Luna standing behind me, sans any of her regalia. The mare smiled devilishly as she jumped into the air and dove into the pool. The moment her horn surfaced, I felt like a victim swimming in shark-infested waters. The light trail of ripples followed her until the next thing I felt was my boxers getting ripped right out of my hands. She then surfaced with my boxers in her mouth. "I trust you will entertain me as we bathe together?"

"You're gonna get me into trouble, aren't you?" I asked, trying to grab my boxers.

"Only a little, but nothing law-breaking." She said as she flipped my boxers onto her head and slid her horn through the front slot. "How nice, human wear does accommodate for the horns of ponies."

"That's uh... where my... yeah..." I awkwardly explained as she seemed as jubilant as ever.

"I'm aware of what it is. You've forgotten that I've cleaned up after you when you had your dream session." She explained. "Do I not look silly, does this not amuse you?"

I quietly grabbed my boxers off of her head and answered her. "To a degree. But for now, I'll just hold on to these."

As soon as I said that, the pair of boxers simply disappeared from existence. I looked at my empty hand and back to the smoking gun that was Luna's horn. "You humans really attach yourselves to these things far too much. I think it's better to be natural for a change." She said, teleporting the remainder of my clothes out of the bathroom. "Now, you're in our bath, which is usually off-limits to guards. It's time you pay your way in by entertaining your Princess of the Night."

Oh my fucking God, you play too damn much.

Meanwhile...

As the sun was finally set upon it's path to drift across the sky throughout the day, Celestia exhaled as she quenched her magic. Upon finishing, her ears flicked slightly as she could already hear the good-mornings and how-do-you-do's of the citizens below. Her balcony oversaw all of the city, allowing her to get a magnificent view of the southern, eastern, and western lands of her kingdom. The birds flew below, tweeting out songs and sounds of the morning, the sound that made the high princess smile for a little while.

But her smile faded from the moment she turned her head from the world, back into her room. From the moment she set hoof back into her chamber, the curtains closed off all access of light. The door was locked shut as the princess walked over to her bed. Looking at the sheets, she groaned despairingly.

"You are too old for this, Celestia. Harden yourself."

She promptly yanked the sheets off of her bed and teleported them off to the laundry room. And as quickly as the old sheets were pulled off and sent away, a new set of linens neatly dressed the bed. After she finished with that, she walked over to her nightstand and stared herself in the mirror. For a long time she examined herself, seeing nothing out of place, her regalia all in the perfect position, almost as if she had went to sleep in them.

She, in fact, did sleep in them that night.

But she did find that the objects she wore on her felt uncomfortable at times. And the longer she looked in the mirror, she felt more and more uncomfortable wearing them. So she ensured that the door was locked and the curtain was free of any revealing crevice. And at last, she proceeded to remove her crown, her slippers, her chestplate, all of her regalia that hid so much of her through the course of a thousand years.

For the first time in many months, she stood as merely herself, looking in the mirror. But this time, there was a lot more to see. Scratches, hidden scars, even a slight tan line from the chestplate she wore. But as her eyes wandered onto her chest, she became disheartened.

"Princess Luna, quit playing too much!"

"Behold my new attire! They dress the derriere quite fittingly, don't you think?"

"Please give me back my shirt!"

Celestia giggled slightly while the sounds of the two playing in the bath brought her a small amount of joy. But what soon followed was regret and dread. The princess sulked once more.

"How long did I rob you of the years with me?" She asked quietly. "How long have I known there were other ways? I could've banished you to the pillars of this world, to the roots of the Tree. I would've seen you so easily then, to watch you grow, to tell you what all I've done in the passing years. I would've protected you, sister. But I've hurt you more than you know."

Placing her naked hooves on her exposed chest, she clenched her eyes shut thinking of what could've been.

"If you were still with me throughout all those years, would things be as they are? Would I have been so selfish? Would I have been so deeply wounded that I would seek some form of solace? Would I have stayed pure? Would I have condemned so many to a fate so unsightly, so demeaning? Would you have saved me... from my mistakes?"

The princess jumped, immediately tossing everything back onto herself. She then grabbed a bottle of scented oil and spread it upon the sheets of her bed. Upon finishing, she trotted to the door and called out. "Who is it?"

"Hey, your highness. It's me, Alex."

Celestia didn't hesitate to open the door and greet him head on. "My goodness, I didn't think you'd know your way around here so well!"

"It kinda helps when you go snooping through your brother's phone while he's unconscious for a week, and you just so happen to run across a series of photos labeled 'castle floor plan' in his porn folder."

The princess' cheeks ran scalding red as she glanced back to the bathroom. Covering her muzzle with a hoof, she timidly asked the human. "Does your brother actually ingest those kinds of things?"

Alex shrugged. "Dunno, he's been around ponies for a while so I'd like to assume that he's just forgotten about the stuff. And I don't think he would need to considering that he has a girl....friend..." Alex soon stopped himself to correct his statement. "Had, he had a girlfriend."

The exchange between the two grew silent for a few moments before Alex broke the awkwardness.

"Anyways, that's what happens when your passcode is your damn birthday."

Celestia sighed as she leaned against the door. "I suppose it's no different from Luna. She's caught up in her own perversions, even being a bit flirty with some of the guards. Of course they fear being the subject of her attention and for good reason."

"Approval Process Law a.k.a the Bullshit Evolved Clause?" Alex answered.

Celestia giggled for a few seconds before she smiled at the human and said. "Oh, it's more like they've watched what I've done to Shining Armor during his engagement to Cadance."

"Ah, protective sister." He responded. "I know how that goes."

As the sound of water crashing against the floor alerted the two, Celestia took the proactive approach of stepping out of the room, closing her door behind her as she carried on the conversation. "Sorry, Luna's taking her bath. She's a bit playful but she's a strong practitioner of good personal hygiene. So, what do you want to talk about today?"

Cutting straight to the point, Alex questioned the princess. "I'm here to ask about your research. Any improvements?"

"Tremendous, you should know." She joked, winking at him.

Alex shuddered as he rubbed the goosebumps on his arms. "I think I'm more into keeping my hands today, also my wife would not be happy with me being anything other than what I'm supposed to be, kinda came with the whole marriage contract thing."

The princess giggled behind her hoof innocently. "Well I suppose I'll be the subject of experimentation today. How does that sound?"

Alex looked at her with some concern. "Are... you sure you wanna do this?"

She looked back to her room, thinking of the two playing in the bathroom. "We both have someone we need to help. It's only fair that I do this for you since your brother has done so much for me already. After all, you can call me greedy, but I am taking a strong preference to having him remain as my captain of the guard."

"So you're just holding my brother hostage?" Alex joked. "That's mean."

Celestia's horn glowed dimly at first and then surrounded herself with the aura of her magic. "Not really keeping him hostage. Just call me a bit... possessive."

"Are all you princesses like this?" He asked.

She smiled. "Don't we all deserve something?"

If there is one thing I will come away with from this morning, it's that I will probably never bathe with Princess Luna again. It's not that she's annoying as hell, in fact she's fun. She's pretty funny, free-spirited, and even eager to be hospitable towards me. The thing is that she can be a bit of a flirt, too much of it even. Granted she didn't go all-in and grab the goods while she had every opportunity to do so, but the fact that she rubbed my inner thighs and her leaning over my back while doing so made me a little more excited.

Compile that with the bad case of blue balls I'm suffering through and you've got yourself a flag at full mast ready to sail the sea and plunder some booty. And it took every maneuver possible to keep that mast hidden from view, including an uncomfortable tuck between the legs. She's the girl that knows you can't fuck her but she's gonna have her fun with you regardless. She's the virgin tease, in other words she's a virgin that knows what she wants and will make you anticipate the thought of being the first to explore the unknown territory. It's not like I didn't know this before, she clearly warned me.

'Tease me, child. You might taste something you can't tame.'

I was _thisclose to doing just that. She even present several openings and even moved her tail in my lap, giggling in my ear, telling me all sorts of dirty jokes she's learned since coming back from being banished. And she would describe how lonely it was for her to stay on the surface of a barren satellite. She even shared one of her most embarrassing stories of what she did during her loneliest days of being a banished tyrant. She then proceeded to tell me the ways she would dominate me, of course just to poke fun at my growing level of pent-up sexual frustration.

So for my sanity and my well-being, I'm never bathing with Luna again. She's fun, but she plays too much.

After that little experience and getting back my clothes from the suddenly pouty princess, I walked down the hall to one of the guest rooms and regained some of the sleep I didn't get. I didn't wake up until the middle of the day, around elevenish. When I woke up, I smelled a strong hint of coconut and butter. Though my own scents were strong, that scent was not the one I was wearing. My eyes shot open to see Ms. Coco playing with my hair.

"Your hair is so soft. I don't understand why you humans choose to shave yourselves all over your bodies."

I looked at my hairy arms and then back up to her. "We're just born like this."

She stopped playing with my hair and offered to help me up out of bed. "Yet another interesting fact about the human species. You creatures are so interesting!"

"I don't know if Rarity would like you leering over me like a vulture." I groaned through a yawn.

"I think it's a wonderful experience." Speaking of which, she was sitting on the other side of the room patiently waiting with several bags of clothes in tow. "Oh, and I don't mind it in this case."

I scoffed lightly while rolling my eyes sarcastically. "So you'd leave a total stranger to greet the guy you may have interest in, waking him up no less? Don't you think that's a bit reckless?"

"Don't mistake my curiosity for your species as an invitation for anything physical." Coco quickly responded. "You might be the talk of the town, but you don't look like you can give me what I'm really looking for."

Yeouch, don't set the flames too high. "Sorry. I'm kinda guarded at this point, it feels like everypony's been hunting me down for that reason."

"Well you're single, you're back on your feet, and you're roaming the Canterlot night scene." Rarity elaborated. "If anything, the press have been blowing you up."

Coco then handed me a tabloid, depicting the image of Fleetfoot hugging up my arm while I was walking into the hotel. The headline read out as 'Moving On; TwiDis Relationship Toxic???' I turned to the page to see a bold column with a quote from anyone not named Nondis. 'She's so controlling, I needed my space!' I couldn't do anything but stare. "So this is what passes as journalism nowadays?"

"It's just a bit of celebrity spin, dear. You'd be surprised how lenient they are with you, otherwise they would've already used your fellow humans as sources." Rarity explained.

"Well I'm not amused." I answered frustratingly. "These are not my words."

"Everypony knows that." Coco assured. "The tabloids aren't meant to be taken seriously."

If only she knew how stupid people can get, bless her innocent little mind. "I suppose, but I don't have to like it."

"Get in line, darling. I was in the post for weeks when I disclosed the fact that I wore false eyelashes." Rarity replied. "Now there's no time to lose, I need you to be up and at it." She said as she used her magic to pull at my arms, forcing me to stand up out of the bed. But when the sheets fell off, I tried to desperately free one of my hands to grab the blanket to hide my boxers from the two ponies. But since Rarity's magic was so strong, I was left standing in nothing but my boxers, and Coco quickly examined them.

"Hmmm... that's a pretty nice thread count. Looks like it's well over four-hundred."

"Only the best for my dear Nondis." She said coyly. "Thought the thread count is truly revealed once you take them off."

As her magic began to outline the front of my boxers, slowly peeling them back, I yelped back at her. "Can you not!?"

The alabaster mare looked at me with an innocent smile and allowed the waistband to smack against my skin. "I'm so sorry, I did not know that I was doing anything wrong. I just wanted to show her your thread count." She finished with a bit lip.

She released my hands and presented me with a new shirt and a pair of jeans to wear. "Thanks for the clothes." I answered, quickly grabbing the items to put on my body, which she also assisted with. But as I put on the shirt, I noticed that it was a little tight around the arms and shoulders... basically everything in general. "Uh... I think this is a bit small."

"I know it may feel that way, but trust me when I say this. When you start walking down these streets, you're going to feel more comfortable than ever! Why this shirt exudes confidence, style, flair, and most importantly..." She used a small amount of magic to rub down the center of my shirt. "Advertisement."

"Adver-what?" I asked while looking down at my shirt, only to see her signature logo at the front.

"Now when they see you, they'll know that Rarity-For-You is your primary source for all clothing and apparel! And I haven't even gotten to mention the back."

I tried in vain to look over my shoulder and see what was on the back, apparently she had another logo.

"On the back of it is an ad telling those who see it to check out the show tomorrow... at approximately 8 p.m. Celestial, 9 p.m. Central, and 10 p.m. Lunar." She said rather quickly.

Is this being televised or something? Do they actually have TV's here? "Why the time zones?"

"Because not everypony lives in Canterlot, The Crystal Empire, Cloudsdale, Ponyville, Dodge Junction, or Appleloosa. I've got to advertise it according the radio broadcast."

How does THAT work? "A fashion show, over the radio?"

"You'd be surprised how well it works." Coco added. "The anticipation and speculation over the clothes as they're described to the audience in quick and thorough detail, then the release of the official catalog a week later, basically anyone who wants a dress will be eager to see it in person. Then comes the celebrity endorsements."

"Check." Rarity interrupted.

"The buildup leading to the release of the catalog."

"Double Check."

"And then the huge announcement made at the end of the show... of course after the radio broadcast comes to an end."

"That one is still in progress, but I can assure you that it will be a 'check' by the end of the month!" Rarity said giddily, trotting in place as she looked at me. "Oh, I so do want to tell you, but I want you to say nothing to nopony, not even your fellow humans, as this release campaign will be done gradually!"

"You're re-branding from Carousel Boutique?" I questioned.

"Obviously, Rarity-For-You is not something I recently came up with, it was something I had to patent and file, which was sent in and approved of just four days ago! But that's not the big BIG announcement!" She stood and patiently remained silent, nudging me to further inquire on the issue.

"What is it?"

She ordered me to bend down and lend me an ear. I obeyed and did as she asked. She then quietly whispered in a low voice. "I will be starting my next two branches within the course of the next six months."

She's going all out, she's franchising her name-sake. That is not something to be taken lightly or even remotely shrugged at. I quickly picked up the pony and spun her around, hugging her as I showed my admiration for her big break. "Congratulations! Holy hell, I didn't know you were out here like this! I mean I know you're a go-getter but to see you hitting the gas like this is pretty damn awesome!"

"Okay love-birds, we need to get going!" Coco interrupted, causing me to look at the pony I held in my arms. I felt a little bashful while Rarity just smiled warmly.

"So you don't mind wearing my little billboard today?" She asked.

"Hell no! You did only-God-knows for me, I gotta show you some love."

My first half of the day pretty much went by rather predictably. I spent a few moments standing outside of the Sun Cryst, grabbed a few eyes, passed out a few fliers, got a few winks, and even received some fanmail in the process. As I once pointed out in the past, some of the letters were rather raunchy, a few smelled funny, and I even received a fractional few amount of anonymous death threats.

But the other letters were overwhelmingly positive. A few have told me about the stories of missing family members recovered by my operation QueenSave, and some expressed grief over lost loved-ones, but showed gratification of bringing their family members back so that they could rest in home soil. Others were survivor stories of that event. I even got a few letters from the families of the deceased guards that took on the assignment at Arimaspi Mountain five years back. And then there was the usual foals that came up and wanted their picture taken with me.

As far as mares on the prowl, I did some talking to them as well. Apparently my breakup with Twilight had a split reaction among the demographic. Some were just trying to see where I was on dating ponies in general, others were trying to make themselves available on their schedules so that they could go on a date with me. And then there were the loyalists to the princesses, they condemned my breakup as my being 'insufficient to serve the royal appetite.' And as they carried on, so did I...

Honestly, I did more interacting on my own behalf than on Rarity's.

But by the end of my three hour stand-in time, I was walking back into the hotel lobby for a much-needed rest. Walking up to the counter, I saw a huge set of speakers rolling in behind me. Two stocky earth pony stallions accompanied a mare wearing black-rimmed shades with a purple tint. She pointed forward and took a deep breath. "Where the hell is the guy who runs the counter?"

She took a brief glance around the room, then her head locked onto my general direction. She tilted her shades down, revealing her magenta-colored eyes to see me standing against the wall.

"You!"

I looked around for a moment and then pointed to myself. "Me?"

"Yeah, you're that human that dropped by the hotel last night!"

"...Yeeeaaaahhh?"

She walked up to me, wearing a bit of a scowl on her face. "So what, my music ain't good enough for you?"

I looked at her with a show of confusion. "I... I'm sorry, what happened?"

"You walked right by the place. The vibe was kicking, the bass was knocking, and I see the doors open in the back and there you go walking up, and by the party I was DJ-ing."

I didn't know that was a personal offense. "Yeah, I was with the VIP party. Sorry."

"Are you kidding, you went to that boring shit? You had the opportunity to cut shit lose and you go to that snooze-fest?"

Well it wasn't really anything to snooze at, there was some sex. Granted, I've been to parties with a lot more going on back in my world, especially at the frat house, but the gathering was still fun to experience... despite the sexual frustration that carried over from that. "I didn't really have much of a choice, you know, military things."

She sighed and shrugged at my answer. "Whatevs. You're wearing Rarity's logo, so I'm assuming you know where the ballroom is."

I shook my head. "Afraid not. I was just brought here to advertise outside."

The mare groaned out of exasperation and facehoofed. "Isn't there somepony around here who can help me unload my shit to the correct spot!?"

"Give me a second." I said, running up to the counter and ringing the bell one good time. No response. I rang it again for good measure. No response. I tapped on the button another five times to pretty much change only how much noise was in the front lobby. "Yo, counterboy!"

Finally, he stepped out of his office and stood looking at me with an uncaring face. "Yes, sir?"

"We're trying to get to the ballroom. Sound equipment needs to get there for the big show tomorrow."

The mare then walked up beside me and slammed her hooves on the counter. "We need to have sound check done by the end of today! I have a gig later at a club downtown, I'm getting paid to set up the other half of my shit over there, and they're getting that done even as we're talking here."

The stallion didn't change his mood, but he showed some form of cooperation. "Down the hall. You're going to be using the entire room so it doesn't really matter which door you're going through. It's all on the right."

"Thank you." The mare said as she quickly turned to her guys and pointed down the hall and then pointed right. And with a nod, they quickly toted their cargo to their destination. She turned to me and took off her shades. "Thanks a bunch. It's been a pretty long day. Some jackass spilled a drink on my mixer when I was packing up this morning. So I had to drop everything, head out to Ponyville, buy another mixer from my guy down there, head back up here, set up half of the shit I used for last night, send all my good subs, my tops, my monitors, all that shit here for the big show, and then I'm running extra late."

"Sounds like one hell of an afternoon." I said.

"Yeah, I'm sure the past few days you've had your share of bullshit, arguing with a princess, breaking up with another, all after getting out of a coma and having to learn how to walk."

I paused for a moment and looked at her. "How did you know about─"

"You're front page, bub. And my damn roommate never shut the hell up about how well you play the piano. You know Octy?"

"Octy?" I asked quizzically.

"Octavia Melody, plays cello, gray mare, charcoal gray mane, purple treble clef cutie mark?"

Yeah, ran into her earlier. "You had me at cello. I just saw her this morning with an ensemble in the royal residence hall."

"Yeah, she's a big fan of yours."

Those are some words that haven't worn on me lately, not that I don't appreciate it. "Cool. So what do you need help with?"

"Got some other shit to tote in here. Might be a bit heavy to go at alone, so I brought the other two to help."

"Okay."

"And maybe later tonight, you can drop by the club and hear me perform."

That might not be a possibility. "Well, if you're performing tomorrow, then maybe I can hear you at the show."

"It ain't the same." She complained sadly. "It's too many restrictions, censor this, cut out that, fade here, cross there, scratch here, dip the volume there. I'm just doing this for a check here. But me at the club... It's pure art."

"Maybe sometime later."

While the mare didn't seem very enthusiastic, she was happy to take that as an answer. "Sure thing."

As we walked outside to get her stuff, I opened the door for her. "Just one more question."

"Sure, what?" She looked at me with a quirked eyebrow.

"Does your mixer have a RCA input channel?"

After I finished helping Vinyl Scratch with her equipment, we finally ran into Rarity. While she was nice to the DJ for her engagement, she was not as withheld when it came to me. When she realized that I held lug her equipment in, she went off on me for putting too much stress on my body, possibly reopening my wounds from surgery. And at the end of the day, I was pretty sweaty and tired, so she banished me to the confines of her suite until she came back up to speak with me.

That would take hours before it happened. Most of the time I spent was on my phone, which I had plugged into the wall religiously. After a few rounds of Candy Crush, I grew bored of the game and decided to ride the ye olde wave of the internet. I caught up on some current events, apparently a lot has happened while I was gone. But it was nice to see some instance of modern technology reviewing some instance of modern technology.

Yeah, other than gaming content and cancerous comment sections, that's YouTube in a nutshell.

I looked through my messages to see if I had missed anything important, other than my father getting upset that I missed one of his calls yesterday evening... oops... all seemed well. But that one phone call would lead to a lot of trouble if I didn't respond. So I called him up once and waited for him to answer.

"Hey this is Harold, I can't come to the phone right now, but if you leave me your name and number, I'll call you back. Alright now, stay safe."

I hung up immediately, realizing that I hadn't really prepared myself to say anything to him. So I looked at my phone and started thinking out loud, reciting what I was going to leave on his voicemail.

"Hey dad, Nondis here, I'm just calling to let you know that I'm on the road to good health again." He's gonna want me to come back home if I tell him that. "But my recovery isn't quite done yet. Just a few more tests I need to get through before I'm cleared for take-off." He's gonna want to know a finite date. "I should be around by this Tuesday. So I can see you guys then." He's gonna ask about Bella. "Bella couldn't come, she's..." Just tell him upfront. "She and I broke up... so we're not seeing each other right now." He's not gonna buy it. "She's really mad that I cheated on her." Yeah, that would be a great way to start Thanksgiving with your judgmental parents.

Ugh... okay, let's start back on Bella.

"Bella had to go to work, s-she works on the holidays." Where does she work though? "She works in... uh..." A college student who works on the holidays? Since when did that make sense? "She's gotta support her family."

This is clearly not working for me... fuck...

"...Hey dad, I'm just here to let you know that I'm never coming back." Now that's an easy way out... not a good one.

Maybe I should just leave it at that. He'll know I called him and I'll just ignore his call. We can toss this back and forth until we meet up on Tuesday, consequences be damned. Why the hell did I ever try to call him in the first place without even planning this shit out?

I'm such a fucking dumbass.

...I continued to use my phone to browse around on YouTube, I needed to watch something funny to break my mind out of this slump. So for the following fifteen minutes, I've watched people embarrass themselves for six seconds of fame, And since each video was around nine minutes or so, I was easily distracted for a while, that was until the laughs grew empty and the videos started to get repetitive.

It opened my eyes to the world of some of these Vine content creators, when one of them hit something good, they try to run that gag into the ground. I mean, whatever gets you the attention. But after so many videos, you start to see that they're clearly not giving it like they used to, like they're losing interest in the things they love because of the expectation to provide more of this thing they love. They start to feel a bit numb to the experience and then with all the editing and extras, it starts to feel like a traditional 9-to-5 shift. By then, who's really enjoying the content, the fraction of your subscribers who don't watch your videos anymore because they found something new to capture their attention?

I wonder if the fashion industry is any different.

If Rarity was, and she truly is, a content creator, then what would happen if the ones who was there for the humble beginnings start to feel jaded and start accusing her of 'selling out' instead of sticking to the same formula all the time? Would she panic or would she just be content with the fact that those who've followed her for so long will begin to feel like they're looking at a whole new and unfamiliar Rarity? I can't even begin to understand what it feels like to say you're expanding your brand, only to get called a sell-out.

Rarity truly deserves this.

The door clicked and opened, revealing Rarity with a bottle of water in tow. On her face, she wore her red sewing glasses as she greeted me. "Did you ever get some rest?"

I continued to look at the videos on my phone. "I got some for an hour, but I pretty much got bored after a while and started to do things to keep me occupied. It feels a little weird to not be on duty, it's like every second I'm fighting something or going somewhere."

She trotted over and sat herself beside me. "I just didn't like how you went out of your way to put stress on yourself. You know you're fresh out of the ward, I don't like the possibility of seeing you go back on an error of your own doing."

"I'm fine, really." I argued strongly. "If anything, I'm just tired of hanging out up here with no one to talk to or nothing to do."

Rarity glanced at my phone and leaned up against me. "It looks to me that you've been keeping yourself entertained."

Yeah, the novelty of entertainment on the go. It's like having over a hundred channels of cable and say 'there's nothing to watch'. I mean how much of a lie is that?"

She reached her hoof to the phone and held it in her possession. "These little things you humans have are quite outlandishly advanced, so quirky and yet so fun-looking."

"Well would you believe that tiny little thing is actually a window to the world as I know it?" I asked her.

"Well maybe you can open a window for me and let me see something from your world?" She cooed anxiously.

I tapped one of the apps on the screen, pulling up Siri. As the screen popped up, I spoke into the phone. "Google Austin Texas Skyline."

And as soon as the command was received, the first image that popped up ended up causing Rarity to nearly drop my phone. She stuttered for a second or two before I confirmed what she was looking at.

"This, this is my home. It's where I was born and raised."

Though the towers didn't impress me at all, they did impress the seamstress. She spent long moments staring at the image. "So this is your hometown? Well you're not a small-town boy now are you?"

"Yeah, but that ain't all." I said as I pulled up Siri again. "Google University of Texas at Austin images."

I took the phone from her for a moment, pulled up one picture and showed it to her again.

"This is the college I go to, or went to before I was spirited away to this world."

Again, Rarity was very much amused. "This is your university? Oh my goodness, it looks positively enormous? How many attends the institution?"

I took my phone and started running through the photos, going back to some of the pictures we took after we were inducted into the fraternity. "Well, it's around fifty-thousand students, around forty-thousand undergrads."

"That's about the size of a small town!" Rarity exclaimed. "Oh dear, don't let Twilight hear you say that or she'll be begging you to take her to the library."

"Yeah, and she'll be reading there all day, I'll never be able to show her anything else in my world." I cosigned as I finally came across the picture, showing it to her. "This is the fraternity I joined last year. You might see a familiar face or two."

She closely examined the photo, seeing the humans all in various poses standing before the frat house. She started to point out the obvious. "I see Rickey, he's not that different from what he looks now. Cliff, on the other hoof, appears to have shorter hair. I don't think I've seen him with it that short." Finally, her eyes came across me. "Oh my... that's you?"

I looked at the one she pointed to, confirming her guess. "That's me."

She looked at the image of me and then to the me that was sitting beside her. As she did it, she shook her head in disbelief. "My goodness, you are so different from when you started off. I mean I never really noticed it from just seeing you day-by-day, but I did take a slight notice because I was always taking your measurements. It was like each time I had to rework every outfit because you were always losing weight."

To be honest, I almost forgot how chubby I was at times. Now that I've got another pair of eyes looking at both the before-and-after, I've started to see what shocked my brothers so much. "Well that's what happens when you're forced to walk everywhere you go for over ten months, plus military training."

"You mean you don't walk everywhere you go in your world?" She asked.

"It's more of an option in my hometown. It's kinda like Canterlot on steroids, imagine thousands of carriages moving ponies at will from one side of town to the other, or up the street, or even to a friends house."

"I would imagine that the poor carriage driver must be tired of running such distances." She said, rubbing her chin.

"Not at all. Our carriages, or cars and automobiles as we'd call them, are a lot different. For starters, they run on gas instead of actual labor, kinda like how the trains run on steam. And then we actually drive them ourselves. Most of us have one but then there are others who don't. That stuff aside, we're all pretty much out doing our own thing."

"Ah, I see. That's a pretty farfetched concept, everyone having a carriage of their own."

"It's not to me. It's been like that since long before I was born, decades even."

"I see it would enable some degree of indolence." She joked, poking at my stomach. "Guess all that walking from the castle to my boutique did you some good."

I leaned over and looked at her unimpressed. She merely responded by poking her tongue out at me. I responded by lightly grabbing her tongue, holding it out of her mouth as she yelped out in dislike. "Poke at me again, I dare you."

She responded by lunging her head forward, opening her mouth as if to chomp down on the two fingers I used to hold her tongue. I quickly let her go before I lost any fingers. While I was laughing at her, she pouted with crossed hooves. "How rude!"

"You started it!" I responded, this time poking at her stomach. She chirped with surprise as I withdrew my finger.

"Excuse me, you don't have to poke and prod! It's rude to treat a lady this way, to taunt her for her body!"

Instead of poking with one finger, I lightly poked at her with all five. She quickly broke her pout as I ticked her stomach. I then added my left hand for maximum effect, tickling her sides and hooves at will. She started to giggle uncontrollably, wiggling and kicking her hind legs. "Ha ha ha ha-Non-dhis, cu-hut hit out!"

"Fuck that, you started it. Imma finish it!"

Her horn lit up, holding my wrists off of her to break me off. After freeing herself, she jumped on me and smiled as she held a hoof on my chest. "I do believe that I have the final say."

"You and your magic, why don't you ever try to win a contest with me without using any of that shit?"

"Because I like putting you in compromising situations." She quipped with a growing smirk and narrowing eyes.

"Like how you were gonna pull my pants down in front of Coco?"

"I don't know what you're talking about." She answered innocently.

"How about you take that magic of yours off of my wrists? Then we can talk."

She looked to the side with a fiendish grin, leaned in close to my face and whispered just inches away from my lips. "Nnnnope."

I tried to lean up, but her magic pressed against my shoulders, pinning me to the back of the couch we sat on. She giggled with glee while I looked up at her with moderate frustration. "What do you want from me?"

"I don't recall wanting anything from you." She said quietly.

The next thing I felt was a warm presence grabbing at the crotch of my jeans. Lightly the aura massaged and pinched at the tough fabric, reaching at the very thing I feared she would use against me. As I struggled in place, she leaned into my neck and bit my ear. My pants grew considerably tighter and more uncomfortable as she continued to put her magic to use. My hips desperately tried to guide away from the magic, but she somehow matched the tempo and moving in opposite to my motions, making it feel like I was willingly push into her magic. The slow sound of a zipper being undone was the one thing that made me close my eyes. "Ah, shit."

"But I do recall you wanting something from me... I remember we were in the Boutique and I was in your lap, doing girl things."

"Describe 'girl things' to me." I said, starting to grit my teeth.

"Having a little bit of fun." She mused, whispering in my neck, biting into me again.

Though she was busy having her way, she left me with a small opening. The nape of her neck was easy for me to reach with my head alone. Realizing she was too invested in her activity, I responded by giving her a bite of my own. Her eyes shot open as she felt the tips of my canines poke into her skin. My jaw tightened slowly, but enough to force her to remain still. The taste of coconut and butter made me savor the moment even more as she squeaked loudly. Her magic broke, allowing me to take charge.

I flipped her over to rest her back, her hooves dangled as I dominated her size, leering over her as if I was some predatory monster with a starvation for meat. I dove in and sank my teeth into her neck again, making her arch her back and hug me in place. A long moan escaped her lips while I grabbed her, lightly choking her a bit.

"Nondis, stop!"

Her words caused me to pull back, snapping out of my trance. Her body remained on the couch, her chest rising and falling rapidly as she looked at me.

"What time is it?"

I reached for my phone and read the screen. "6:27, why?"

"Damn!" She hollered, pushing herself out from under me. "I planned a short fifteen minute visit, not a whole half-hour and then some! I've got to be back downstairs for the dress rehearsal!"

I was left on the couch for a few seconds, cursing at the cushions before I stood back up. My arm tensed as I felt like punching something out of pure anger. "Is there anyone who could look after the whole thing while you're gone?" I selfishly asked. "Doesn't Coco know how the show goes?"

She looked back at her flank and stomped her hoof. "Agh! You were not supposed to tease me like this! Now I'm a mess and I've got to clean myself before the other stallions get any ideas!"

"You started it!"

"Well I'm afraid you're gonna have to finish it on your own, dear." She said, galloping to the bathroom. "I can't work under these conditions!"

I quickly walked up to the couch and grabbed a pillow, screamed into it several times, and realized it had her coconut scent in it, which resulted in me screaming into it more. After a few minutes of that and her freshening up, she quickly trotted to the door. I ran over to stop her, but her magic held me in place as she opened the door.

"I'm sorry, sweetheart. I have to get going."

"Tonight? Please?" I pleaded desperately.

"I'm afraid that I'll be up until the sunrise working on some final alterations and wardrobe fortifications. I know how you feel, I am obviously not pleased myself."

"Before the show?"

"I need to be focused. I can't afford to have a tryst while trying to go over the final plans before the curtains rise." She responded quickly.

"After the show?"

"I've got the VIP dinner, the discussions with sponsors, payouts for the staff, hanging out with the girls. I'm gonna be tired when I get back."

"I'm gonna put you to sleep. You ain't waking up till Sunday afternoon."

She trotted up to me, yanking me down by the collar of my shirt. "Don't you have me anticipating something like that and not live up to the expectations."

"Consider it the after-party."

Her lips crashed into mine, her hooves pulling me closer as she shoved her tongue against mine. Our eyes didn't close once while our tongues violently met several times. In an instant, she was doing whatever she could to keep us latched together. Her breaths grew short while she moaned and greedily used her magic to grab at my crotch again. My hands wandered to the base of her tail, pulling it slightly. A soft whisper left her lips. "Harder."

Before I could oblige, she shoved me off of her and smiled.

"I am going to have to keep you on a leash in a kennel."

"You need to hurry up before I drag you back in this room."

She narrowed her eyes, appearing angry when she hissed through clenched teeth. "Oh, absolutely NO masturbation. If I can't get my bit of stress relief, neither can you."

"I want you mad when you're coming through this door, I want you to rip off the clothes you made."

The mare groaned out of frustration as she stepped up to me. "YOU!..." She paused for a second to rationalize her thought process. "Me. Elevator. Downstairs. Rehearse."

On those last four words, she teleported herself out of my presence. Leaving me at the doorway. I closed the door and sat back on the couch, covered in the smell of coconut and butter. I stuffed my face back in the pillow I screamed into earlier and took a deep breath, catching the wonderful scent. As I did that, I had only one thought that ran across my mind.

"...Since when was she able to do that?"

The evening was pretty quiet with the exception of me watching videos on my phone again. The sun ran beyond the horizon and the moon was brought up in it's place. The lights of Canterlot gradually outshone the pale moonlight as the town got busy for the weekend. It appeared that the residents have come out of hibernation and started bombastically taking to the streets to do whatever they wanted to do, finally free from the stress of the workweek. Everyone was happy and anxious for what was to come next.

And I was no different.

Even though I was confined to this suite, I was already putting my mind on tomorrow. Just the things we did earlier was enough to put a spark in my mood, one I haven't had in a long time. I didn't have to worry about who's life I had to save, what army I was going against, or even which politician was giving me grief. For the first time in a long time, I could casually stick around for something so personally exciting. And I'm doing more than anticipating it, I'm strategizing for it.

I picked up every magazine on the subject, looking like I was cramming for semester finals for it. Even that one article I felt was ridiculous just two days ago, I was reading like it was scripture. I took note of the positions, the little techniques, the things that unicorns liked, and how I could take it to the next level. I was a total scholar and I was pretty much waiting for it like a kid on Christmas Eve.

I know I'm not supposed to be rushing shit, but I wanted this. Hell, I needed this.

Under most human circumstances I could've looked up a few items on my phone, find out where these items were being sold, take my car, drive up to the place, pay and pick up, ride back home, set up, light the candles, play some music, let her walk in, and see where the night takes us. But the most I could do was order some wine for tomorrow evening as well as some food for now.

Probably for the first time in a long time, I was having a sing-a-long by myself. My phone speakers cranked up while I was dancing to the slow beat of the song.

When the main verse came up, I practically started dancing, grinding on the couch like a dumbass. For a moment, you couldn't tell me shit, I knew I was the best fucking dancer, if I was a terrible dancer then I was the best fucking terrible dancer you've ever seen. I was having a party of one, it was a Friday night, and I knew what was coming in the next twenty-four hours.

Life was good.

I didn't pay any mind to it initially, I was too caught up in the second verse to be caring about who's at the door. But when I realized that I had placed an order for room service, I had danced around the room towards the door. Again, you couldn't tell me to stop. So I smoothly glided to the door, opened the door, and looked down to see...

"Twilight?"

My ass stopped dancing then. She looked up to me, appearing very displeased with me. I'm standing in the doorway looking Fifty Shades of Stupid and she's looking like the Diary Of a Mad Purple Mare. "Hello, Nondis. It appears you've been active for the past few days."

...I already knew this was gonna dampen my mood considerably. She's probably looking to have a long conversation with me about all of this. "Well, some things happened and─" And here I am forgetting that my phone was still playing music in the background.

Twilight angrily looked at me as she snarled. "Till you do WHAT!?"

"Siri, close tab." I called out to my phone.

Twilight's mood didn't get any better as I continued to fumble with my phone. "Siri, close tab!"

Goddamit. "Siri, close Safari." The phone did as ordered and closed the web browser, leaving me with a face full of palm with a slight hint of coconut.

Twilight walked past me, into the suite as she spoke. "So you've been here with Rarity this entire time? You not only come out to embarrass yourself, but me as well. And then you also come here expecting one of my friends to appease you on your own time."

I rolled my eyes and calmly explained to her. "Twi, Cadance was drunk. She and I had a drunken altercation, we both did some stuff that was gonna catch the eye of the press."

"If you knew she was drunk, then why didn't you have her escorted to her quarters? You do realize that is a power you have?" She vehemently replied.

"Well I didn't know. Things happened as they were and I can't do anything about it right now."

"You can't do anything about it? Is that what you believe?" She questioned.

"So what, you expect me to just say 'I'm sorry' and watch the whole issue of her getting drunk and calling me out in a public setting ride by like it's all water under the bridge?"

The purple princess ignited her horn, summoning a small stack of papers. She then shoved them in my face. "This is a carefully, well-written public statement I want you to make effective tomorrow before the show. In it details a list of transgressions and a heart-felt apology to Cadance and Shining Armor."

I took the papers and put them aside as I argued with her. "Hello, you do realize I was NOT THE ONE STARTING SHIT!"

"I couldn't care less who started what!" Twilight responded. "I'm trying to finish it! I don't want either of you to end up bickering and blabbering about he-said she-said. The royal image is tarnished enough as it is without any of this, I'm doing this so that there can be peace among us. We're all on the same side, we don't need to go to war with each other."

I merely laughed at the though of Cadance and I going to war. "Twilight, we're not trying to kill each other. It's just a squabble. We're adults and we can smooth it out on our own time."

Twilight reintroduced the papers to my face, standing pat on her position. "I don't think there's a better time than present. So get it done."

For a moment, I was stuck in thought, trying to rationalize a means of how I can pass this off without appearing too bitter over the issue. Truth be told, I'm not allowed to apologize to Cadance until all of our plans come into play. And if Shining and Blueblood hasn't given the word to Twilight, then she's clearly on the outside looking in. So I pulled up my phone and started texting while I spoke. "Maybe... I don't feel like it's the right time."

"What?"

"I feel like you're forcing this because you want everything to be well, but this is the real world. People need time to simmer down, and I don't think things have gotten to that point. Shining's pissed off at me and he's probably thinking about killing me again. You honestly expect me to just make things good between us like that, but it's not gonna happen."

Twilight continued to argue me down. "Then give this whole situation a place to start simmering down! Make the statement tomorrow at 4 p.m. and I can set up a dinner between the four of us so we can hash things out."

"I can't do that. Cadance needs to apologize first." I said adamantly. "You don't call my integrity into question at a party among the social elite and expect me to take it sideways."

She groaned with irritation and shoved the papers down the front of my shirt. "Fine, I will talk to Cadance about it. But you better meet me halfway with this. Make the statement tomorrow at the time I appointed to you, not a moment later."

"I can't do that." I said again, this time ripping the papers she stuck in my shirt. "I know you want it done, but you need to wait."

Twilight, finally deciding she had enough of me, screamed at the top of her voice. "I need to wait!? FOR WHO!? I'VE DONE EVERYTHING I POSSIBLY COULD FOR YOU, AND YOU CAN'T EVEN DO SOMETHING SO SIMPLE FOR THE SAKE OF OUR KINGDOM'S IMAGE!?"

I simply shrugged. "...I can only explain everything later. Just be patient with me, please."

"Oh, I can be patient." Twilight said sarcastically. "You're going to damage the image of our kingdom over some petty squabble, but I can be patient. You're already discussing plans to have sex with one of my best friends while I still have feelings for you somewhere, while the embers of our break-up are still red hot, but me being impatient?"

I looked at the infuriated princess and sighed. "I'm not asking you to trust me, I know that's beyond done at this point. But I can and will explain everything when it's all said and done. And you don't have to like me after, but the only thing I'm asking you to do is to listen to me when I'm finished. Can you do that?"

She and I stood there looking at each other for quite some time, neither one of us breaking eye contact. She only summoned yet another copy of her papers and shoved it in my face again. "You won't have anything to say to me until you've read what's on each page."

She allowed herself out of the room, storming through the doorway. Twilight didn't look at me since, even as she spoke to me one last time.

"After all, we've broken up. I guess you're free to do whatever you want. But I wonder how much of your time with me was actually worth something."

The door slammed shut, leaving me in silence. The mood from earlier was replaced with uncertainty and regret, instead of eagerness and anticipation. I looked at my phone one last time as I sent out my message. My head dropped as I sat on the couch, not really knowing what I was going to do here. I'm sitting in Rarity's suite, planning to do the unimaginable with her and suddenly I'm met with the cruel reality of my circumstance. And I don't have any excuse for myself in regards to Rarity. I just went where the blood flowed and now it's probably going to cause more hurt than harm if we go through with this.

I looked at my phone to read the response.

I try to get things out faster than I do, but life seems to get in the way far too often. At least I was 3/4 of the way there before I was pulled in various directions. But as a consequence (if you could call it that) I will be with a significant head-start on the next chapter.

In speaking of which... Give it a week.