The party at the Delta Phi boardinghouse was more than just a party. It was the event of the semester, or at least that's what the guys tried to call it. Everywhere you looked, you could see the other students getting so bombed that they kissed the nearest person or item next to them. It was like a huge pansexual orgy, minus the sex... Well, the sex mostly took place upstairs in the guest rooms, bathrooms, and closets. If anyone had to take a piss, they had to go outside and do it in one of the bushes against the house next door. The backyard pool a breeding ground for flirtatious activity. All around the place, everyone was having a blast, dancing without a damn care in the world...

Everyone except for, you guessed it, the pledges.

If you were a pledge, it didn't matter what your classification was, what major you took, or how wealthy your family really is. If you decided to become a member of Delta Phi, or any frat for that matter, you were going to do something that would embarrass the shit out of you. If they had a charity, you were the ones that had to raise the money. If they wanted you to fuck with some girl scouts, which I would personally advise against doing, then you were going to do it, get your ass kicked, and possibly sued for harassment. If they had a party with a theme, then you had to be apart of the theme.

The party's theme was 'The Gentlemen's Ball'.

When I had first thought of the theme, I had assumed that I was going to serve as a butler or a servant, something within that area. Unfortunately, I couldn't have been more wrong. Instead, they made all of us wear French maid costumes, complete with the aprons and accessories. That's not even the bad part. The worst of it all was that we had to wear everything. EVERYTHING. That means we'd have to wear the fishnet stockings, the high heels, the lacy brassiere, the make-up, the hair-do's, the nails, the little hat, the waxed arms and legs, the costume, and the g-string to go underneath it all.

That was the first time I had to wear a dress. And being that I was a little on the chubby side, I was not pretty to look at.

So while we had a full-on tranny-fest, we had to act as the servants to all of the guests. That means if they asked you to do something stupid like dig up your nose and eat your boogers while counting to ten, then you'd best be doing it. Otherwise, you'd have to go to the 'Room of Purification', aka the room where they'd paddle your ass until you nearly shit yourself.

Hazing was a common practice.

While I walked around to serve anyone who wanted it, they'd give me a tip. And that tip would go to a 'charity' of the fraternity's choosing. In truth, it meant that they were saving up for more beer and other snacks. The bar needed to restock itself somehow.

During my time in what they would call the 'Scorching Sands' you were to go by a series of tests and trials. Some of them dangerous, some of them silly, some of them will get your ass kicked, some of them will get you suspended, others will have the school revoke your scholarship. Sounds bad, but that last one was for the ones that tried to disclose the hazings that goes on behind closed doors. Hell, as expensive as the tuition was to go here, you'd have to be a stripper or sell your organs on the black market to stay enrolled.

But I digress. Back to the party.

The party came off as a success. Everyone who was in attendance was pretty chill, except for the occasional drunk who'd start some shit. I had to help toss one of those very drunks outside. And after a good heave-ho, the party was good to go. But when I had started to make my way back inside, a familiar voice called out to me.

"Nondis?"

I froze up, completely embarrassed for myself as well as the girl who called my name. I was so ashamed, I tried to run back into the house and go back to the kitchen to help serve up some refreshments to the guests. Moments had passed by as I started to work my way around the house again. But then I was summoned by one of my big bros to help out with a guest.

If only I had ignored that order.

"Nondis, what in the hell are you wearing?" Melanie asked me as she looked at me with a disgusted look.

I laughed nervously as I tried to creep away. "Oh hey-"

I was then stopped by the 'big bro' that summoned me over. His name was Prett, pretentious fuck. "Hold on, faggot! You speak to your guest!" He said as he shoved me right back over to Melanie.

She gave him a disapproving scowl as she turned her attention back to me. "What are you doing?"

"Look, I'm just trying to do what I can to fit in. Can we not ask about... you know?"

"Well, as a woman I feel offended by what you're doing. Why are you even dressed like that?"

I sighed as I looked to the larger guy that stood next to her. He gave me a wicked smile as he made himself comfortable, eating the snacks off of the tray I once held. "Melanie, it's just temporary. I'm not gonna-"

"Maid," Prett commanded. "What do you wanna do to her?"

I really didn't want to say what he was going to make me say. But if I was going to get into this fraternity and become apart of something, I had to do it. "F-fu-"

"I can't seem to hear you! What do you wanna do to her?"

Melanie, I am so, so sorry. "FUCK HER RIGHT IN HER PUSSY!"

The crowd of people around me started to laugh and giggle as I said the infamous line of that one guy who ran up to a broadcaster's mic and screamed it on live television. Melanie, however, was far from amused. "Excuse me?" She questioned, seeming appalled at my vulgar confession. The worst part of it was that I wasn't allowed to apologize for it.

"Look, I'm just trying to do what I have to. Please just go along with-"

"No!" She interjected. "I won't go along with this bullshit and neither should you. Why is it that you feel that being here would make you any more of a sociable person?"

"I-"

Prett gave me yet another command. "Maid, show our guest a good time."

"What does he mean by that?" She asked angrily.

"Whatever the fuck I want it to mean." He stated openly. "If I say it, he follows. He wants to be one of us, I'd say we let him."

Melanie started to pull me out of the front room and find someplace where the two of us could talk. "Let's talk for a moment."

But then Prett gave me another order. "Our guest seems unsatisfied with our offers. Maid, please show her just how much you need her to stay. Kiss her feet."

I was a tad bit reluctant, but I obeyed his orders. The moment my knees hit the ground, I bowed over to kiss the well-cared feet of Melanie. I took a deep breath, swallowed my pride and went for it. But before my lips came in contact with her, she stormed off and broke for the front door. "Fuck this." She mumbled while she walked out of the party.

"Melanie!" I shouted, trying to get her to come back.

In seconds, we both found ourselves walking on the front lawn. She headed for her car as I constantly followed her. For moments at a time, she'd remain silent as I called out to her.

"Melanie! Melanie, look... I'm sorry-"

"Don't you see what's going on here?" She asked me, pointing to the house with her keys in hand. "You're being played for a sap!"

"Look, just give me time. I can be more than popular as soon-"

"As soon as what? You embarrass yourself in front of the whole campus!?"

I tried to calm her down. "Melanie, it's just a party. I'm having fun. Really." I lied.

"So you call degrading yourself fun? You call letting a bunch of bullies tell you what to do fun? Have you fucking lost it!?"

"No. I haven't. I just figured that I could finally make some more friends."

"Yeah, that's good and all, but this isn't how you do it!"

"Melanie, a fraternity is a gateway of making life-long connections. If anything, it could open up so many doors for me."

Melanie blew air at my statement, shaking her head. "You can't be this naive. Nondis, you can't possibly believe that an organization that does all of this to you now will become something that will get you more friends."

"How do you know that!?" I questioned, starting to become frustrated.

"Because it doesn't! You have to be sociable to begin with! You can't just slap on a few greek letters and call yourself sociable! You have to learn how to interact with other people! You have to develop personal relationships with them in order for it to work! And all that bullshit about life-long connections is just what it is, bullshit!"

"Well, maybe I just want to be popular for once in my life, you know like not being a social reject! Have you ever thought about that!?"

"Being popular and making friends are two different things! You'll see when shit starts to get rough, then who's there to help you out!? None of those 'friends' would even spit on the dirt you walk on!"

I walked around for a bit, starting to let the anger boil up inside of me. "Why is it you care so much what I do!?"

"BECAUSE I'M YOUR FUCKING FRIEND!"

"Really!? Last I checked, I gave you a lot of fucking advice that you chose to ignore! So why should I listen to you now!?"

"What advice did I ignore!?"

"GEE, I DON'T KNOW! HOW ABOUT EVERY FUCKING BOY YOU'VE EVER DATED! WHEN YOU COME BACK SAD AND SHIT, I'M THE ONE THAT TELLS YOU THAT IT'S GONNA BE OKAY! BUT AFTER THAT, YOU SAY THAT YOU'RE GONNA TRY TO MAKE THINGS WORK! AND THEY NEVER FUCKING DO!"

"SO, WHY DOES THAT MATTER!?"

"BECAUSE IT'S LIKE YOU CAN'T JUST GRAB A FUCKING HINT! I MEAN, HELLO! I LIKE YOU, BUT YOU LIKE THIS OTHER GUY INSTEAD! IT'S LIKE YOU KEEP SAYING TO ME 'HEY, I WANT YOU TO STICK AROUND BECAUSE YOU DO SO MUCH FOR ME, BUT I'M GONNA GO WITH EVERYONE ELSE IN THE GODDAMN STATE EXCEPT FOR THE ONE MOTHERFUCKER THAT ACTUALLY GIVES A FUCKING SHIT ABOUT ME'!!!"

"THAT'S WHY YOU'RE MY FRIEND! FRIENDS CARE FOR ONE ANOTHER!!!"

"THEN WHY AM I THE REBOUND GUY THAT YOU ALWAYS FUCKING TALK TO WHEN SHIT GOES WRONG!? WHY IS IT THAT YOU CAN NEVER GIVE ME A CHANCE!? YOU DATE ALL THESE ASSHOLES AND YOU CAN'T EVEN GIVE THE GUY WHO'S NEXT TO YOU A FUCKING TRY!"

"OH HERE WE GO WITH THE NICE-GUY ROUTINE! JUST BECAUSE YOU'RE NICE TO ME, DOESN'T MEAN THAT I'M OBLIGATED TO BE WITH YOU! I DO HAVE A CHOICE IN WHO I WANT TO BE WITH!"

"HOW CAN YOU KEEP ACTING LIKE A DUMB-ASS BITCH!?"

...Oh no. I-I didn't mean to say that. That was just some comment in the back of my mind. I didn't mean to actually say it out loud. No no no no...

Melanie stopped talking. Instead she looked at me heartbroken. Though she looked angry, I knew that she was disappointed in me. Not only did I insult her, but I had the nerve to call her out of her name, something that I swore that I would never do.

"Melanie-"

She threw her arms up. "No, you're right. I'm a dumb-ass bitch." She stated with a trembling voice. "I made mistakes."

"Melanie, look, I didn't mean that."

"Well if you didn't mean it, then you wouldn't have said it."

"I was just angry. Look-"

She took a deep breath, as the tears started to show on her face. "I'm a dumb-ass bitch. I am. I am one for the sole reason of getting to know you."

My heart sank like a weight in oil. My palms started to sweat and my hands started to tremble as I tried my best to apologize to her. "I'm so-"

"No." She walked off, making her way towards the driver seat of her car. I followed her, hoping to prove just how sorry I was. I didn't want our friendship to end like this.

"Melanie."

The engine turned over and the car started as she looked back at me through the lowered window. "Make all the 'friends' you want. I don't care anymore... I just don't. I'm done. I tried to help and be there for you... But I'm just a 'dumb-ass bitch' to you."

The windows started to roll up. I ran to the front of the car, hoping to stop her from driving forward. "Please, just listen to me-"

She lowered the window to the driver's seat side, allowing me to walk over and speak to her. But before I could even breathe, she spoke first. "Thank you for showing me what kind of a person you really are. Goodbye... asshole."

The tires screeched as she pulled off in reverse. I jumped back to avoid my feet from getting ran over as I watched her car furiously turn around and leave down the street. I couldn't help but to remain frozen in place, mortified of what all had just transpired. I couldn't believe that I had said something so horrible to her. I had literally became the very same guy who talked down to her, who'd call her names, who constantly devalued her.

I couldn't hate myself more than I did now.

"Holy fuck! That was some Young and the Restless shit!" I heard Prett holler from behind me. I turned around to see a crowd of people quietly staring at me as Prett walked over to me. "Hey. Don't even trip. You just got yourself out of the friendzone."

"I didn't me-"

"And you couldn't have made me any prouder." He added.

Though his praise didn't really add to the large hole in my heart that I was left with. He placed his arm around me and walked me back inside. I kept silent as the words kept replaying in my head, as if it was spinning on a record and the needle kept going back to that one part... the one part I didn't want to hear.

"Hey. Look here, you can get so many more bitches than her. And you can find some that are way better than her. Besides, you're too young to be held up like this, just to be called a friend. Hell, she wasn't even giving you any play!"

As he and I walked back into the party that night, he continued to fill my ears with immoral musings and objectionable statements. But no matter how much he tried to poison me, there was already one thing that had done me in.

I just killed my only friendship.

Present Day...

"Nondis, I think you owe Melanie an apology."

Did I ever. I couldn't believe it, I knew I had a long to-do list I wanted to cover since I left Equestria. And giving Melanie my apology for what I said was more than just an item on the list. It was the first thing that was written down.`And here it is, my opportunity to make it up to her. I tried to break myself off, but her grasp was too strong for me to break without using force. Instead of breaking apart the hug, I decided to give her my apology as is.

"Melaine... I'm s-"

She pounded against my chest, fussing at me all the while. "Don't you ever do something so stupid again! You could've been hurt, killed, kidnapped... How stupid can you get?"

"Melanie-"

Once again, I was interrupted. "Where the hell have you been for the past nine months!? You had me so worried!"

"Bro, since that fiasco in Galveston, we've been trying to find you." Rickey added as he looked at his phone and checked the time.

My attention turned to the guy who just finished speaking. "What? Why?"

Cliff scoffed at my question. "Are you even listen to yourself, bruh? Is that mushroom still in yo shit?"

"I mean, I wasn't even anybody worth saving to you-"

"Nondis, dude, think for one second." Rickey interjected. "If you disappeared, a full-fledged member of Delta Phi and a fellow human being, do you honestly think we're so careless to leave your ass swimming to the sharks?"

"Honestly, you guys didn't even pay any attention to me. Once we had the probate, it was like I was non-existent."

"Yeah, you were on some wierd-type shit. But for real, you still roll with us."

Melanie pulled herself away from me, disappointed in my responses. "Nondis, why do you feel as if the world doesn't care about you?"

That's the thing. It didn't. If I was to die here and now, the world would just keep spinning and running it's course. "I mean, scientifically speaking-"

"Are you really that dense?"

I can't help it. Try being bullied for so many years and ignored, being used as the butt-end of every joke since middle school and have that same stigma carry over to high school. Try constantly getting into situations where everyone starts to stare right back at you and think you're weird for just being yourself...

Deja vu...

It finally hit me. Those words that replayed over and over again in my head. The very question Melanie just asked me, they sounded just like a familiar phrase I heard from long ago. Haven't I heard that before? Yeah, with Pinkie.

"Sorry. I don't want to be anything more than friends with you. You... I just want you to be close to me. I can have you close by and not be in that kind of relationship with you."

Haven't I been in this situation before? Yeah, with Melanie to be more specific. The only difference was that I didn't have the sexual drive to Pinkie that I did to Melanie when I had first met her. At the very least, I was okay with Pinkie's decision to stay the way we are. "So we'll be friends. I have no problem with that."

"I..." Pinkie sighed and turned herself back to me. She gave me a gentle smile before opening her hooves in request of a hug. "Yeah. We'll be friends."

"Great." I answered back, accepting her offer.

She and I hugged each other for an extended amount of time. Our embrace became full and heartwarming. I could still smell the vanilla frosting that littered her body. Her hooves slowly ran up and down the length of my back as she held on to me. "Yup. The best of friends."

I broke away from her, noticing that her words had sounded rather melancholy. I looked at her, seeing that she was wearing her usual masking smile. "You sure you're okay?"

She poked me in the nose, smiling all the while. "I'm fine, silly. I just need to clean up."

The pink mare turned away, finally walking out of the room. I could see that the thin smile she wore had finally dissolved into a frown. Hoping to see her smile, I cracked a joke at her. "Don't run all the hot water out."

She cracked the door as she left, but stood motionless outside of the room. She popped her head back in and I saw the same look she wore when she found out that Caramel was looking for her. Her mane had somewhat deflated, her eyes had went from a warm gleam to a icy, hopeless glow. The circles formed under her eyes as she avoided the sight of me. Her voice became weak and quiet. "You know, you can be a bit dense."

She finally closed the door on me, leaving me perplexed at her statement. I really didn't know how to respond to that. It was unpredictable. I didn't even think something like that would even leave her mouth, let alone the very idea of her calling me dense. The only thing I could do was scratch my head.

That's just it. My view of humanity had become so skewed because I looked at all the negatives that I had gone through and applied those persons to the entirety of the human race. I've allowed myself to remain a victim of the past and I haven't let myself see that there are a lot more than just those jackasses in the world. I mean, humankind is going through some pretty dark times, but our humanity still exists when there's a call for action.

And this search for me, the way an entire college practically placed their concern over finding me... no an entire city of over eight-hundred thousand had placed their concerns over my well-being. It didn't have to involve them actively searching the streets for me, nor does it require them to make phone calls. All they had to do was offer their thoughts and well-wishes. Even the smallest things, the little things, mattered.

And that's what I've been ignoring when I lived here.

Back in Equestria, I lived in a world that provided me with a broader view of how kindness and concern for one's well-being could really make a difference. And this one little asset had fueled one's will to carry on, despite the trials and tests they had to face. Here, I was so busy being locked in my room and ignoring the world around me that I didn't give a damn over the littlest things. The small stuff that humanity had to offer was shielded off by my desire to play video games and watching anime, cartoons, TV and porn.

I blinded myself to the good things that went on around me. And now, nine months from my being missing in this world made me realize just how much I was valued. I may not be worth much, but to my family and friends. I was irreplaceable. Now let's include all of the friends I made in Equestria, plus a princess that I would soon be marrying. If I had went missing from there for over nine months...

I selfishly devalued my own existence. Wow... I am dense.

"..." I guess I didn't have much to say then.

"Nondis," Melanie held me and looked into my eyes as she made sure that every word had gotten to my ears. "We care about you. Your mom's been missing you. Hell, I've been beating my own ass for leaving you alone. And I wanna make sure that you see that we do care. If you wanna throw another one of your pity parties-"

I stopped her right then and there. "For what!? Why do I need to feel sorry for myself? Because I missed out on current events?"

She started to chuckle a bit as she released me. "So you don't feel-"

"Why?" I interrupted. "If I felt sorry for myself, then that means everything I did for the past nine months-" I had to stop myself there. I couldn't explain to her what all was going on with me. I just knew that it would be best for me to try and work things out without going into the details of what I went through for the past nine months. How would she even respond to hearing that I was a trained guard in a world of technicolor equines? "Let's just say that I wouldn't be here if I was still feeling sorry for myself."

The girl smiled warmly as she finally wiped the tears from her eyes. "So, where the hell were you for nine months?"

I spent about two hours trying to explain my whereabouts. I didn't want to tell them about Equestria, no matter how easily I could prove it all to be true. The last thing they needed to find out that I was some sort of freak who was getting more-than-friendly with a pony. I guess it would be easier to say that I had gotten washed up in the bayou somewhere in eastern Louisiana. At least then I could cover myself for the nine-month span of my being missing, especially since the search was mainly exclusive to the state of Texas.

After I wove together the details of my story, I checked my phone and saw that my service was long deactivated. Melanie handed me her phone and insisted that I'd call my mom and let her know that her baby was still in one piece.

And it went without saying that I had gotten an earful from dad over my using drugs.

After retelling my story, they decided to come by and pay me a visit in the morning. After I had hung up, Melanie gave me another hug before she finally set off to her new apartment, which I just found out was two buildings down from mine. I guess med students really need their time away from the rowdy uproar of the campus. Rickey stopped Melanie just before she pulled off and told her where I stayed.

She didn't even give it a second thought.

On the ride home, I had told her about my to-do list. I had asked her if she could check out a copy of Farenheit 451, The Fellowship of the Ring, The Two Towers, and The Return of the King. I also asked her if I could borrow her set of the Lord of the Rings trilogy. I had the boys to lend me their projector for 'Mondo-phi'ed Movie Monday', an event I made up on the spot which was in truth, me fulfilling my promise to Princess Celestia.

When we rode back up to the apartment complex, she showed me the building she stayed at and told me to come by and visit her when I was feeling lonely and in need of talking to someone. After that, I showed her to my building and got out of the car. When I tried to apologize, she told me that I was stupid for even trying. She knew that I felt remorseful for what I said. The only thing she did was hop out of her car, give me a long hug and telling me how she forgave me. She also warned me about playing too much video games.

While notifying me that she'd pick me up in the morning to take me to breakfast, she drove off and left me to return to my room. After cleaning up the rest of my apartment and finding the air a lot more clean, I ran downstairs to pick up my laundry to take back up to my room. By the time I was finished with everything, it was about two in the morning. I started to think about taking my brief exit back to Equestria...

...But my queen-size bed was calling my name!

For the first time in nine months, I didn't let myself become disturbed by a pony wanting to do something for the day. I could actually spread my arms and legs in whatever direction and rolling over without fear of falling off of the bed. I could drool into my pillow and not even feel embarrassed by the servants that came to change the sheets daily. I woke up to the familiar sounds of birds chirping outside my window.

When I opened my eyes, I was somehow expecting myself to look at a high ceiling with crystals hanging over my head. But instead, I just looked at the boring white popcorn ceiling. Instead of curtains lining the side of my bed, it was just open space. Instead of a golden clock with bells, I saw a digital alarm clock that read seven in the morning. I got out of my bed, expecting to look to the far end of my room towards a double door, instead I was looking at my closet and computer. Walking into my bathroom, I could see how different the counter height was in comparison to the one in Equestria.

Man, after nine months of getting used to one thing, it really starts to become awkward to go back.

After a long warm bath, I threw on some clothes and stared back at the bed, wondering if I could somehow fit my mattress into the portal. Like hell I wasn't going to try. For the next half-hour, I spent my time shoving my entire bed through the portal. And thankfully, I came out with success. When Melanie had arrived, I had threw my DVD player into my backpack and hopped into the car.

For breakfast, we went to a local IHOP. She decided to treat me to anything I wanted, but she also instructed me not to eat too heavy for the upcoming meetup at the frat house later on. Apparently, today was the day of the big Red River Rivalry, our annual rivalry match with the University of Oklahoma. Last year, we managed to knock those assholes around a bit, so here's to hoping that the result remains the same.

When we finished up our breakfast, we started to drive towards the frat house for the watch party. As we arrived, Cliff and Rickey pulled me out of the car, put a gorilla mask over my head and guided me towards the back of the house. After I had questioned them over what they were doing, they said that they wanted my appearance to be a surprise. I guess if I was to walk around unmasked, there was a chance that I would be discovered and the surprise would be ruined. At least their plan was well thought-out.

When we had entered into the kitchen, I was given the okay to remove the mask and wait for their instructions to enter. They went on ahead to address the crowd in the other room as I waited in the kitchen. While I waited, I could hear Rickey speak.

"Ladies and gentlemen, my bothers of Delta Phi would like to welcome you to our watch party. Yeah, we know you could drive all the way to Dallas and watch the game for yourself, but that would only mean you'd have to deal with the risk of getting a few tickets to get there. And I don't mean the ones in the stadium either. So if you drove your ass out there and we just so happen to lose, then you gotta deal with those pissed-off troopers on the way back."

I giggled a bit at that. Everyone else also laughed quite a bit.

"So, we're glad you decided to take a chance on us and let us take all your time and money from you. We swear that we won't tie you to your chairs and make you give us more unless we lose, cause then we'd have to pay off a gambling debt to our younger brother Texas A&M. But anyways, we hope that you guys will enjoy the food. Don't eat all the fucking cheese and leave us with the crackers. If you feel like you drank a bit too much, then we'd kindly encourage you to let loose at the Gamma Rho house next door. If you have a desire to break anything, we have Kit-Kat bars you may kindly partake in. If you want to punch someone in the face, please aim at yourself. Drink, love, enjoy yourself, piss-off Sooner fans, GO LONGHORNS!"

A lively crowd cheered in the other room.

"Now, before this game starts, I want to say something. As you all know, for the past nine months we've been looking for a fellow brother of ours. Since January, we haven't been able to get in touch with him. So we sent out a search party that our good friend Melanie was in charge of. Ma'am, sir, on the behalf of Delta Phi, we would like to apologize to you for the events that transpired last semester. We also take full responsibility for what had happened and we have thrown together a suitable amount of money to present this gift to you."

That was my cue. I walked out from the kitchen, down the hall and into the room where the crowd and my parents awaited me.

My mom was the first one to run up to me and grab me. My dad strong-armed me towards him as he got his hug in. Both of them held me, sobbing happily while I threw my arms around them. The crowd around us cheered as they all applauded my return. All the members of the fraternity then decided to throw themselves at us, dog-piling us with hugs and cheers. I didn't think any of us actually cared that the national anthem was playing on the TV. They only had one thing in mind, and that thing was me. They were all happy to have me back. Of course, a few more than others.

I don't think I've ever been moved to tears like this since Sweetie Belle last sang to me.

As the last play of the game played out, we all sat in disappointment over our loss to the Sooners. The final score was a close thirty-one to twenty-six. We were still trying to deal with how close of a game it was. For a moment we all thought that our team would come back and get it in. But sadly, the Sooners showed why they were the eleventh-ranked team in the nation.

The party goers all started to disperse and the fraternity finally showed us the present they were meaning to give to my parents. They had managed to replace the car I drove into the gulf. Of course, meaning that I was back from being missing for nine months didn't exempt me from my father's punishment. He decided to take the car from me and let me go on with walking for a little longer.

I agreed with his punishment. I didn't have a reason to own a car considering that I was now living in another world.

And that's what made this entire thing a little harder to deal with. I could easily keep in mind that I had to keep my upcoming marriage to Twilight a well-kept secret. To them, bestiality was considered a cardinal sin. But that's what I should expect from a pair of bible-toting parents who zealously believed that it would be best for me to go to a Christian College like TCU instead of here.

Hell, the only reason they agreed to it was because I was still within arms reach of them.

The day with my parents and Melanie dragged on. And later, we finally got around to finishing that list I had. By the time we completed everything we needed to do, it was time for dinner. My parents looked at me and Melanie, smiling as they decided to get their time in with me later. Though my dad made a joke about us going on a date, it seemed that I was the main one that flustered. Melanie just simply laughed. So to celebrate the occasion, she took me to a local steakhouse and asked me to order whatever I wanted.

I had concerns for how much she intended to spend on me, but she didn't seem to care. I guess I should take her up on that offer. A nice juicy steak sounded a shit-load better than hayfries right about now.

"So... how does it feel being back in civilization?" She asked as she looked at her menu.

Honestly, I never left. But according to my story, I had. So to keep up with the lie... "I missed eating real food, if that's what you wanna know." I had to apply some of my thoughts on Equestria towards here.

"Yeah, I mean how did you manage to wander from Louisiana, all the way to Texas on foot? Without passing out?"

"I thought I already told you." I answered, paying attention to the illustration of a succulent steak that lied on the menu.

"Yeah. So..." She trailed off, placing her menu down.

"Soooo?" I motioned to her to finish her statement.

"In the time you finished your pledge, I can assume that you must've met some pretty cute girls."

She wasn't lying there. "Yeah, I guess you could say that."

One of the waiters approached us and happily took our orders down for us. "Hey guys, I hope that I didn't have you two wait too long. So have you decided on what you wanted?

Melanie closed her menu and handed it to the waiter. "I would like the chicken fajita platter."

"Okay. I'll get that for you. And what would you like to eat, sir?" He asked, turning his attention from her to me.

"I want... the Texas T-Bone please."

"And how would you like your steak?"

"Medium-well, please."

"Okay then. What would you like for your sides?"

"Mashed potatoes and mixed vegetables."

As he finished writing, I handed my menu over to him. "Alrighty then. I'll have these out for you two in a moment."

He walked off, letting the two of us carry on our conversation. Melanie started up first. "So why did you disappear on us like you did?"

"I just... I guess I was feeling like I needed to do something to fit into the whole frat-boy scene. I know, stupid huh?" It turned out to be my best decision yet. It was all thanks to chance that I could go to another world and start over with my life. Even getting a shot at happiness with a girl I'd never thought of meeting.

"Yeah, that's pretty stupid if you ask me."

"Thanks for the vote of confidence?" I said in deadpan.

Melanie pulled out her phone to check the time. Somehow, I had forgotten that I could do that now. Nine months make you forget some of the most routine things you used to do. "So, while you were walking, did you have any thought-provoking moments or life-changing stories you might wanna share?"

Plenty. But I couldn't share what they were exactly. I had to generalize. "Well, I did learn the value of the little things in life. General occurrences that ultimately made me look back at how I was seeing the world. At times, I was so selfish that I wanted everything to work out according to how I wanted it. But with all the strife, I ended up learning that I shouldn't be so hasty to toss things aside, especially when those things were really close to you and could help you out."

Melanie smiled as she looked towards one of the larger television screens on the other side of the restaurant. They were recapping the big game that we lost earlier. "I guess you did learn something."

"So what about you?" I asked. "What have you been up to for the past nine months? Aside from looking for me."

"I changed my major. I'm doing forensic science and criminal justice as a minor."

"Why did you change from medicine?" I asked, intrigued by her choice.

"Well, I had to find you. And not only that, but when you went missing, it put things in perspective. I know how it feels to lose someone close to me and the fear of not seeing them again. So I wanna do all I can to help others find who've they lost. I don't want anyone to experience the stress that I had to go through of losing my best friend."

I guess that's a pretty solid reason. "I'm sorry to put you through that."

"You're here. That's all that matters." She stated, returning her attention to me.

"So... meet any guys? I heard you and Rickey went out."

She scoffed at the mention of dating Rickey. "I was making a huge mistake. He's cool and all, but he's not boyfriend material. I didn't like it when he looked at other girls."

"Looked as in how?"

"You know, checking out their asses, ogling at their tits. Every time I'd call him out on it, he'd say that he was 'looking and not touching'. I already knew then that looking was going to mean that he was leaning towards touching."

"Well, how about now? You're seeing anyone?"

"You know me. I just... I'm not really feeling him as of late. He's not really taking care of me as he should. He's becoming a bit controlling, self-centered, looking at other girls, texting other girls."

I sighed at her confession. This wasn't the first time that this has happened. "Then why are you with him?"

"To be honest, I don't really know anymore. I wanna leave, but I just can't right now."

"And why not?" I asked.

"...I don't know. I guess you could say that I'm looking for the bigger fish to take me in."

And I thought my analogies were weird. "If it's that hard, then leave him now. Wait on the right one to find you rather than you go out to find him."

"How do I know when I found the right one?"

Coming from experience, I already knew. "You'll know in your heart. They'll make sacrifices for you and won't even care about getting anything in return."

She sighed and started playing with her fork. "You sound like Dr. Phil."

"That's just real life. Not something that a TV therapist can tell you. You learn from life and you apply those lessons to all of the future choices you'll make."

"...So how about you? Are you talking with anyone?"

I am. But I can't say who or what she is. She's a different species from me. I had to fight with her older brother just to prove that my love for her was genuine. I had to break the hearts of two other just to have hers. And in the end, we don't have that much time for each other because of my duties as a guard and hers as a princess. A mouthful to say the least, but all of it can be summed up in two words. "...It's complicated."

"So you are talking to someone. What's her major?"

Umm..." Princess of Friendship. How would that translate into the college world? ...Got it. "Social science."

"Does she go to school here?"

"No she goes toooo... UT Arlington." I was an expert at lies.

"Oh. So she's there for the education then. So how did you two meet and when?"

Think Nondis, think. "We met at a party sometime after the probate." Hopefully, that's a story that I don't have to re-verify on a later date.

"So... what's keeping you two apart?"

"...Family. She has an older brother who's not too fond of frat-boys." I guess I could visualize Shining Armor as that kind of guy.

"What's her name."

"Twilight-" FUCK! I wasn't supposed to say her name. "The book... It has her name as the main chick... Bella! Yeah, her name is Bella." That is a sin of sins. Twilight please forgive me.

"Are you lying to me?"

Does a cow says moo? "No. I'm telling you the truth."

She looked at me with a serious expression. "You're not just making this up?"

"No." I stated sternly. "Her brother tried to fight me and even broke my arm. See, I even have this scar where they did the surgery."

I pulled out my left arm and showed the mark of where they fixed the bone in my arm after my duel with Shining Armor. At the very least, I had the scars and marks to make my story seem legitimate. And the best part of it all was that the magic caused the healing process to shorten from a few weeks to a matter of days. She inspected my arm, seeing that the scar was very much there. "Wow. You weren't lying."

Cheesing to myself over the validity of my argument, I pulled back my arm as the waiter came with our food. "Yeah. I don't lie about this kind of stuff."

The steak I ordered was placed directly in front of me. I almost wanted to cry tears of joy over seeing such a large slab of meat sit on my plate in contrast to a gigantic salad. She had received her order as it sizzled in the hands of another waitress.

"Enjoy the meal, you two. I'll be back to check on you guys momentarily."

Oh I was going lick this plate clean.

We finished our meal and left the restaurant, making our way back home. As we rode around, I could see the sun setting in the distance. My mind wandered back to Equestria, seeing that Celestia was probably setting the sun there as well, with Luna raising the moon shortly after. The colors of the sky mixed and mashed into an assortment of pinks, purples and indigos. When she had dropped me off, I had informed her that I would be unavailable for visitation for a week, mainly to get myself used to what I missed out on. I also asked her to notify my parents of my desire to be left alone for the time being so that I could recuperate.

In reality, I was going back to my new home.

She gave me a lengthy hug and said that I shouldn't stay hooked into my games too often. I agreed and grabbed the backpack full of items on my list. When she drove off, I quickly walked up the stairs and grabbed my phone charger as well.

I wanted to at least show Applebloom, Sweetie Belle, and Scootaloo what my cellphone looked like. I made that promise to them and I was going to keep it. I also got the books Celestia wanted to read, the projector I could hook my DVD player into, the Lord of the Rings trilogy (both book and movie-wise), a few other tools to put my bed back together and the set of clothes I wore when I came back here.

Thankfully, it didn't take as long to pep-talk myself into walking into the portal. With a heavy breath, I grabbed my things and transferred worlds.

When I had gotten back, I could already see that my bed was missing. I guess it's safe to say that the servants and assistants must've moved it elsewhere. Toting my bag, I walked towards my room. As I walked out of the room and down the hall, I could see two guards standing around, talking to one another.

"Hey boys!" I called out.

"Sir Nondis! We have been looking everywhere for you!"

Somehow that didn't surprise me. "How come?"

"Well, Princess Twilight had requested your presence just this morning. Unfortunately, we couldn't seem to find you all day."

"Well, I'm here. Is there anything she wanted from me?" I asked.

"No. But if you wish to see her, she just went to her quarters. She was also carrying a rather enormous bed with her-"

"Bed... MY BED!?" I exclaimed.

After all the hard work of getting that huge-ass mattress across the portal, I was not going to lay in the same bed I slept in for the past nine months. I bolted down the hall, frantically searching for Twilight. Considering how large it was, it would be likely that she struggled with it. But then again, unicorn magic makes everything a lot easier. After I turned the corner and ran into the familiar bedroom, I could see Twilight starting to change out her mattress for mine. As soon as I busted the doors in and ran inside, she looked at me with shock.

"Nondis! What's up?"

I pointed to the mattress that she was about to place on her bed. "My bed, that's what."

She gave me a rather malicious smile as she walked towards me. "...So this is your bed?"

"Yes." I answered as I started to walk past her to grab it.

Magically halting me just two steps into her room, she giggled playfully as she shut the door behind her. "So this is your bed?"

"Yes. It's my bed."

She flew up to me, placing a hoof on my chest as she became mere inches away from my face. "I don't recall you needing something so big to sleep on. And from the looks of it, you could easily fit two on this."

"Come on, Twilight"

Her hoof started to wander a little lower. Her gaze became lustful as she licked her lips. "So this was the bed you slept on? The mattress you lied on when you let your primal instincts get the better of you? The very same mattress you'd visualize all of your most depraved sexual fantasies on?"

Focus, Nondis. Now was not the time to be getting teased. "Yes. My. Bed."

She stopped shy of my crotch and booped me in the nose three times. "No. It's. Not. This is our bed."

Oh for the love of... She's already taking over the mattress and we haven't even slept in it. "How are you staking a claim to it?"

"Because you're mine. And whatever is yours is mine also."

Now that's just mean. I refused to be bullied out of my bed. I worked too damn hard to get my bed across to this world, and I will be damned if I don't sleep on in for one Equestrian night. "But I wanna sleep on it!" I playfully whined as if I was a child.

"Nope. You'll get to lay on it when I get to do naughty things to you."

Fine, if that's how she wanted to play... "Okay then. You wanna do naughty things with me, then lets do it right now."

She released me from her magic, throwing me towards the mattress on the floor. As she stood over me, she leaned over and kissed my cheek. She nibbled at my ear a bit as she whispered to me. "Okay. I'll play with you... if you can tell me one thing."

Starting to feel a bit excited, I started to let my hands go exploring all over her body. "Okay. You want me to tell you the things you want me to do to you?"

Her magic froze my hands in place as she nibbled against my ear one last time, this time being a tad bit painful.

"No... I want you to tell me about the girl who hugged you in your world."

...Uh oh.

Well here it is, another chapter I was bullied into writing. So now it has come to this. How did Twilight find out about Melanie? How will the others react to this recent development? Will Nondis ever get any play? Stay tuned to find out.