“Thanks fer the help, Big Mac.” Apple Bloom slipped the four tender zap apple seeds into her saddlebag. They sank snuggly into the cotton pouch, right beside her potion mug.

Big Macintosh was hardly paying attention to her. He was occupied with nursing his electrocuted hooves. The zap apple had put up a fight, doing all but sprouting a mouth and biting Big Mac in order to prevent him from getting the seeds out. After several attempts of peeling with his mouth and forelegs – which had proved to be beyond disastrous – he opted to smash the apple brutally against his plow. The tool in question was covered in the sticky guts of the zap apple and would likely electrocute Big Mac the next few times he used it.

“Are ya sure you're okay?” Apple Bloom asked a teary-eyed Big Macintosh.

“Eeyup.” His response sounded like he was biting back pain, and Apple Bloom felt a little bad.

“Do ya want me ta get the first aid kit?”

“Eenope.”

Apple Bloom rolled her eyes to this. Even a foal could see Big Mac’s quivering lip and redder-than-usual cheeks. He was doing his best to hold back a cry of pain, but would likely run for the nearest bandage the second Apple Bloom left.

“Okay then, Ah’m gonna go.” Apple Bloom trotted along, not stopping when she heard her brother clamor towards the house.

She saw the clubhouse approaching through the trees, and picked up her pace. The cider mug bounced against her side as she cantered. When she reached the clubhouse, she ascended the steps and practically ran through the door. Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle were already on the other side.

“Hey girls.”

“Do you have the seeds?” Scootaloo anxiously asked. Apple Bloom patted her saddlebag.

“Sure do.”

“All right, let’s just do this really quick, okay?” Sweetie Belle fidgeted, looking nervously around the room.

“Geeze, chill out. You’re acting like we’re about to do something illegal.”

“We might as well be!” Sweetie Belle protested. “Twilight is a princess and she told Apple Bloom not to try out the potion until she got back.”

Scootaloo sighed. “I’ve already explained the loophole to you once, now come on, let’s switch bodies already!”

Apple Bloom unloaded her supplies, and uncapped the lid to the potion. All the lab equipment was currently at Twilight’s castle, and nopony particularly felt like going all the way there just to see if Spike could get a few things for them, so Apple Bloom opted to use a more crude method to grind up the seeds.

She raised her hoof and loudly stomped down on all four seeds at once. Moving away her limb, Apple Bloom saw that the seeds were cracked and splitting, but far from crushed.

“Great,” she muttered. “This could take a while.”

“Allow me.” Scootaloo cracked her neck to the side, and then proceeded to jump about to pound the seeds furiously, in what looked like a weird dance routine. Apple Bloom stifled a giggle, and after a few minutes, Scootaloo was done.

“Here goes nothing.” Apple Bloom grabbed the spoon she taken from the breakfast table, scooped up a tiny amount of the zap apple mush, and dumped it into the potion. She stirred it vigorously for a few seconds, expecting the potion to change color like it usually did when new ingredients were added. Odd… but oh well.

Confident the seed powder had dissolved, Apple Bloom pushed the concoction towards her friends. “Well, drink up y’all.”

“Are you absolutely sure you want to do this?” Sweetie Belle asked Scootaloo. “Because it still seems like a bad idea to me, especially considering our track record with potions.”

“Seriously, do I need to say it again? Body. Switching. Cutie Mark.” Scootaloo accentuated each word as if they were supposed to wave away all of Sweetie Belle’s doubts.

“Also, ya get a pair of wings out of this,” Apple Bloom threw in.

Sweetie Belle let out a reluctant groan. “Okay.”

Scootaloo grabbed the mug and moved it towards her lips.

“Just start off with a sip,” Apple Bloom interrupted. “We gotta save some of it fer when Twilight gets back.”

“Fine.” Scootaloo pressed the mug to her lips, and drank one tiny gulp of the liquid. She tore the potion away from her mouth, coughing. “Oh crap!”

“What?”

“That thing scorched my throat on the way down,” Scootaloo rasped. “Anyway, your turn, Sweetie.”

Sweetie Belle took the mug cautiously, and took an even smaller sip than Scootaloo did. “It’s not that bad. Kinda taste like apples.”

They paused, waiting for something to happen.

“Did ya switch yet?” Apple Bloom inquired.

Scootaloo touched her hooves to her face and felt around. “Nope. Nothing.”

“Huh… Maybe y’all should try a little more?”

“So… uhm… how exactly do you know, Octavia?” Rarity casually asked in an attempt to stir up some small talk.

“We’re roommates,” she lied. Well… it wasn’t really a lie; it was more along the lines of a half-truth.

“Really?” Rarity raised an eyebrow. “That’s funny, Octavia’s never mentioned you before.”

For good reasons. “Octavia considers me to be a bit of a disappointment. I can’t really say she’s wrong either. After all, I break her possessions by accident all the time, I keep her up all night with my obnoxiously loud music, and I’m an embarrassment to be around in public.” Octavia smiled. It felt good to hear Vinyl finally admit these things, even if it was just her making Vinyl’s voice say them.

“Really? Well I can’t believe that. You walk and talk just like a proper lady.”

Octavia glanced over her posture and realized Rarity was right. Her habits from her former body were shining through rather blatantly. She had to convince Rarity that she was actually Vinyl. Adjusting her sunglasses, she slouched slightly and began dragging her hooves. “Uh… I dunno what you’re talking about, dude.”

Rarity covered her mouth with her hoof and giggled. She actually giggled. “That – heehee – is quite hilarious, Vinyl. So I take it you were just trying to impress me before?”

“Uh… yeah?” Octavia guessed.

“Well don’t make yourself uncomfortable for my sake. Just be who you are and I’m sure we’ll get along swimmingly.”

You clearly don’t know the beast that is Vinyl Scratch. Octavia cleared her throat. “Well… uh… in that case, dude, it would be, like… righteous if we could get to the hospital soon. Losing all this blood is really a bummer.” She cringed. Celestia, I sound like a moron. Maybe I should just stop; it’s not like I’m fooling anypony.

“Well you’re in luck, Vinyl, we’re here.” Rarity indicated right ahead. The Ponyville General Hospital stood welcomingly in front of Octavia, and she breathed in relief. A few tiny drops of blood were dripping out of her cheek as she eagerly darted inside.

“Finally!” She rushed right up to the front desk. “Excuse me, I need some help.”

The pony at the counter glanced up from the magazine he was reading, glanced down, and this recoiled as his eyes shot back up. “Oh my, you’re bleeding!”

“What an astute observation.” Octavia impatiently tapped her hoof. “So can I get a little help to stop that?

“Yes of course,” he fumbled for a clipboard sporadically, his eyes hardly leaving Octavia’s cut.

Geeze, the way he’s acting you’d think nopony ever comes in here with an injury. Then again, it’s rare that I ever see anypony walking around with blood running out of their cheek in Ponyville.

The stallion was finally able to position the clipboard correctly; he grabbed a pen and asked. “Alright ma’am, what’s your name?”

“Oc–” She paused and coughed a little to cover her error. “Sorry, it’s Vinyl. Vinyl Scratch.”

“Right, okay.” He wrote it down. “So, uh… nature of your ailment?” Octavia squinted, and pointed to her cheek. “Oh, yes… silly me.” The stallion scribbled a few more things down on the paper. It was at that moment that Rarity trotted by her side.

“There you are, Vinyl. You really left me in the dust back there.”

“Rarity?” Octavia bit her lip. “Uh… what are you doing here? I thought you were just making sure I got to the hospital.”

“Nonsense. What kind of pony would I be if I just left you here without making sure you got the proper care?”

I wouldn’t have complained. Octavia forced a smile anyways.

“I’ll be right back with a doctor, ma’am.” the stallion at the front desk walked away, leaving Octavia alone with Rarity.

On normal circumstances, she wouldn’t have minded this so much. Of course, switching bodies with her roommate and then telling said roommate she would consider “putting the moves” onto one of her close friends were far from normal circumstances. Octavia was really hoping it would never come to that.

“Is your face still in pain?” Rarity innocently asked. Octavia felt her coat rip open just a little more, and she bit her cheek.

“I had been ignoring it,” she admitted. “But now that you’ve brought it up, that’s going to be rather difficult.”

“Oh… sorry, dear.” Rarity bit the inside of her cheek and winced apologetically. “My goodness you really are bleeding quite a lot.”

“Gee, you think?” Octavia sighed, but the only thing that accomplished was sending another twinge of pain through her face. “Sorry, I get sarcastic when I’m in pain. Losing all this blood probably isn’t doing me any favors.”

“I’ll say. Perhaps we should make an effort to remedy that.” Rarity looked around the waiting room until her eyes settled on a box of tissues. Her magic grabbed a bunch and lifted them up to Octavia’s cheek, pressing gently against her face. “Better?”

“I guess.” Octavia pushed her hoof onto the tissues so Rarity could release them.

“Out of curiosity, darling, how did you get so cut up?”

“Well Viny– er... I bought some apple cider and had a little mishap with a wine glass.”

“Really? Drinking apple cider out of a wine glass is something I’d expect from Octavia, but you don’t really seem the type. Not that I mean that in an offensive way, of course.”

Octavia opened her mouth, primed with a response that was more than a little sarcastic, but she was interrupted by a voice.

“Vinyl Scratch?” Octavia was slow to recognize that was meant for her, and eventually turned her head to face the familiar figure of Nurse Redheart.

“Yes, that’s me.” The lie rolled off her tongue easily, and the nurse waved her on in. With her peripheral vision, Octavia saw Rarity stand up too and move to follow her. Great. Why do you have to be so friendly?

“Buck. Buck. Buck. Buck. Buck.” The steady, rhythmic chant of swears flowed from underneath Vinyl’s breath as she ran through Ponyville. There wasn’t any time to lose; especially considering Octavia would probably be out of the hospital soon.

If she learns that Twilight’s gone, she’ll be so pissed… and then she’ll take it all out on me! Not to mention she probably won’t help me get inside Rarity’s pants. Thinking of which, I wonder how that’s going… Her thoughts of Octavia’s attempt at flirting caused her to trip over a divot in the road and land on her face.

“BUCKING HELL!” Vinyl screamed with a mouthful of dirt and assorted plant life. She spat, and wiped her tongue with her hooves until she realized how pointless that was, and returned to spitting. “Gah, that shit tasted like… well… shit.” Vinyl forced herself upwards, and began dusting herself off.

When she looked back up, there were several pairs of eyes staring at her. Mares and stallions alike were giving her looks that ranged from the stink-eye to glints of concern. Most were sporting agape jaws to accompany their looks of disbelief especially the foals.

It was at that point that Vinyl realized that she did not appear to them as Vinyl Scratch, the swear-like-a-sailor-all-the-damn-time kind of mare, but instead as Octavia, the pole-up-her-plot-too-prissy-to-even-consider-swearing kind of mare.

Oops.

She handled damage control quickly at least. Vinyl cleared her throat and eloquently delivered her apology in the most refined way she knew. “My bad, guys. Sorry.”

When that did nothing to assuage the shocked ponies before her, Vinyl resorted to plan B. She ran.

Yep… Tavi’s really gonna hate me now.

“Hmm…” Dr. Stable – a middle-aged unicorn with a mane as thin as Octavia’s patience right now– mumbled curiously as he scrutinized her cut cheek.

“Hmm?” she asked, wondering if he meant anything by that.

“Hmm,” he mumbled again, with monotone this time. Using his magic, Dr. Stable levitated a magnifying glass over to her bleeding face. “Hmm…”

Octavia rolled her eyes. She could feel her cheek slice open a little bit more each time she moved and was more than ready to just have a bandage slapped on it so she could leave. Not knowing where her body was or what Vinyl was doing with it was driving her up the wall. I really hope she isn’t swearing again.

“Hmm…”

“Oh, just tell me what the problem is!” Octavia erupted. Dr. Stable blinked and backpedalled.

“You do seem to be delaying her treatment,” Rarity quipped from the back corner of the room. Octavia could feel the frustration in her voice, and couldn’t blame her. It was unlikely that Rarity had been expecting to wait around for thirty minutes while the doctor did seemingly nothing.

“I was just making sure of a few things,” Dr. Stable assured her. He set the magnifying glass down and cleared his throat. “Vinyl, you appear to have some tiny shards of glass still stuck in your cheek.”

As if to rejoice in their discovery, the glass shards cut her cheek open more. “Ah!” Octavia bit her lip. “I noticed.”

Dr. Stable lit up his horn. “Yes, well, the process of removal should be very easy. I’m honestly surprised you didn’t just do it yourself, considering your magic.”

Octavia was befuddled for a moment, before she remembered she was technically a unicorn now. “Uh… I can’t… I don’t really… um…”

Rarity walked into her field of vision. “Vinyl, have you’ve been having magical dysfunction?”

Unsure of what to say, Octavia merely nodded.

“Curious,” Dr. Stable muttered. He narrowed his eyes and leaned in a little. “How long has this been going on?”

Since I switched bodies with my roommate after drinking a random potion. “Uh… a while?”

Dr. Stable and Rarity shared a look. “Perhaps I should look into that.”

“Can’t you focus on the glass shards in my face first?”

“Already done.” Dr. Stable lifted up a tray that held several minuscule, red-stained pieces of glass. He grabbed a length of medical gauze and taped it over her wound.

“But… I didn’t even feel it.”

“You’re welcome.” Dr. Stable grabbed his notepad. “I’ll write you up a prescription for pain killers, and then we can focus on your magical dysfunction.”

“Don’t bother.” Octavia hopped off the examination table and made her way for the door. “I’ll be fine.” Assuming Vinyl managed to get to Twilight and figure out a way to fix this.

“Don’t worry, I’ll talk to her,” she heard Rarity say to the doctor. As she walked out the door Octavia heard hoofsteps follow her.

Great, and now Rarity’s sticking around a little longer. Octavia sighed. It doesn’t matter, I’ll just check out and… wait… does Vinyl even have health insurance?