The Cloudsdale Church of Celestia was considered by many to be the most beautiful building to get married in for pegasi. Using a combination of glass hidden in solidified cloud and sunlight, the interior was lit by a myriad of colors that changed depending on the time of day. For the time of 4:30, it was a beautiful mix of gold and red.

And of course, with the aforementioned place being a church, there was a wedding going on.

The bride wore a simple, if large, wedding dress of pure white that matched the veil hanging from her face to hide her nervousness.

The groom was dressed in a stunning blue tuxedo, although the telltale lighting bolt that adorned his cutie mark stood uncovered.

The vows had been spoken, the…stuff that pegasi exchanged had been presented, and the celestial priest cleared his throat before addressing the crowd. “Now, for any of those who find fault with this union, speak now, or forever hold your peace.”

A tremendous swirl of mystical energy saturated the room between the middle rows of pews, causing the wind to whip around as the air became displaced. Exactly five seconds after the event began, and brought a halt to the proceedings, there was bright flash of light that left four colorful ponies, and one very colorful pony with a flowing mane despite the fact the wind had died down standing in the middle of the floor.

Everypony in the room also took notice that all but two of the ponies should have been falling to their deaths, and that the colorful pony was a large purple alicorn that looked a lot like the newest princess to be crowned from about a year ago.

The large purple alicorn took one look at the pony standing on the left side of the priest and zoomed over to snatch the much smaller pegasus up in his hooves, then held her at forearms length. “You’re making a horrible mistake!”

“I am?” the bride replied from beneath her veil.

“Look, I know what other ponies think is important to you, and your friends most of all,” the alicorn told her in a desperate tone. “But throwing away everything you dream about just because you think you have to isn’t the right way of being loyal to the ponies who care about you! If you live your whole life bound by obligations without allowing any joy for yourself, you’re only going to end up making your life miserable, and none of your friends want that! Even if that obligation is something like an unborn foal!”

The pony in the wedding flinched at the mention of her unborn foal. “But if I don’t marry him, what will other ponies say? I’ll be an unwed mother!”

“Wait…what?” the alicorn asked before he reached out with his magic and removed the veil. Seeing the pony underneath, he blinked in confusion. “You’re not Rainbow Dash.”

“Who?” the bride asked as she was lowered down to the ground.

“Oh that’s Golden Showers, Darling,” the only unicorn of the new arrives announced. “She’s the heir to the second richest family in Cloudsdale. I've gotten so many order from them over the years.”

“MOTHER?” A stallion who bore a striking resemblance to Golden Showers said as he stood made his way up the cloud carved stares. “You’re pregnant? That’s why you’re marrying this this piece of dirt?”

Silent up until now, the groom with the lighting bolt on top of a shield for his cutie mark spoke up. “Hey!” he whined. “No…we’re…um, really in love!”

“Love?” the best mare shouted. “That’s not what you said when we slept together at your bachelor party last night! You said the two of you would get married, and we’d take her for every last bit!”

“The two of you?” another pegasus mare shouted from further back in the church. “He promised me we’d be the ones to get all the money by talking her into investing in a ponzi scheme after we banged last week!”

“He promised me we’d set up a business in Haywaii!” yet another pegasus yelled, only to be joined by a dozen others, each one with some promise the groom had made once he forced the innocent mare into a marriage with plans to suck away her family’s fortune for his own nefarious purposes.

“Ah think we got the wrong church,” the out of place orange earth pony mumbled to the alicorn as an angry crowd of pegasus mares approached what was probably the worst pegasus in all of Equestria and bring justice down upon him.

“But…this was the address Discord’s letter gave me!” the alicorn exclaimed.

“Maybe he got it wrong?” the only pegasus in the group suggested.

All the ponies who saw the alicorn’s face at that moment knew he didn’t think the error was at all unintentional. “Grrrr, come on girls. We need to find Dash before she does something stu…before she ruins her life even worse than it is! Let's go Pinkie, I need you for something.”

First Day Part 7: Twilight and Rainbow’s Little Climax

“WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU CAN’T FIND RAINBOW?”

All of the mares gave each other an uneasy look as Twilight yelled at Pinkie Pie in a desperation-filled voice, except Pinkie Pie. She simply stood her ground, looking at Twilight in confusion as the alicorn continued his rant. “You did it in Ponyville when you…did…your…Pinkie thing!” he spluttered as his brain tried to work through just how inconceivable it all was.

As for Pinkie, she just shrugged off the desperate stallion’s ranting. “Yeah but that was Ponyville. I knew everypony there, and all the shortcuts. This is just the second time I’ve been to Cloudsdale, so…I got nothing.”

But...what if they were only chasing a red herring?

What if it was all come cruel joke sent by Discord to drive him even crazier?

Dash hadn't been in the church! There was no guarantee that she was even in Cloudsdale!

And even if she was, finding her without some way to know where we was would be impossible!

No. we can't...this can't...I cant...I…

“Now simmer down there Sugarcube,” Applejack said as she approached the distraught alicorn to place a hoof on his shoulder before Twilight's emotions could run wild again. The physical contact helped, but, without an actual answer, friendly support could only do so much. “That just means we’re gonna have to figure out where Rainbow would go.”

“Indeed,” Rarity agreed before turning to their secret weapon for locating Rainbow when the pony who could violate the laws of physics on a whim wasn’t an option. “Fluttershy-dear? Do you know where our Rainbow might be? Her parents, perhaps?”

Twilight brightened at the suggestion made by Rarity, and kicked himself for nothing thinking of it sooner. Just because they couldn’t…Pinkie their way out of this problem didn’t mean it was hopeless. Fluttershy was Rainbow Dash’s oldest friend and had lived with her in Cloudsdale for years! If anypony knew where Rainbow was going to be, it was her!

The matter of her hopefully-still-fillyfriend’s parents seemed like a good choice to start. Twilight knew that if he was with foal…as impossible as that was at the moment, then home would be a definite option in places where shelter could be sought.

“Oh, Rainbow’s parents…well, her mother and aunt, Rainbow’s father he kind of…um,” the pegasus cleared her throat and looked away from the group for a moment before continuing. “Well, they don’t live in Cloudsdale anymore, they moved to Las Pegasus years ago.”

While Twilight frowned in distress at having the obvious option dashed, Applejack nodded to herself and let out a little hmm before speaking. “Did seem a might peculiar to me we didn’t meet her folks at that competition when we was here last.”

Then, as Twilight’s mind raced to try and figure out where else Rainbow could possibly be, Rarity cleared her throat and drew everypony’s attention. “Pardon me, but I must ask if we aren’t worried over nothing, I mean…just marrying a stallion because of some expectation and obligation? Does that sound like our Rainbow Dash?”

Twilight flinched at the word obligation, and sighed as he lowered his head towards the clouds. “Yes Rarity, it sounds exactly like something she would do.” Because I’ve been making her do that since we came to Ponyville. Congratulations on teaching such a valuable lesson to your friend Twilight.

“Well…yes. It does actually,” Fluttershy spoke up. As everypony looked at her, she gulped and hid behind her main. “I mean, considering what happened with her father… Sorry, forget I said anything.”

“Fluttershy?” Twilight said as he stepped closer to the pegasus. “What about Rainbow’s father?”

As the pegasus pulled in on herself, Twilight backed away to seem less looming, and lowered himself to her eye-level. “Fluttershy…please, if this is about Rainbow, and could tell us where she might be. I need to know.”

“I can’t…I’m sorry. She wouldn’t like it if I told,” Fluttershy replied. “It wouldn’t change anything right now anyway. It’s just…Rainbow would definitely be the type of mare who would try and marry the father of her foal to keep him around, even if she didn’t want to.”

Her eyes darted over to the church they had just left, and widened a bit before turning back to her friends. “Oh! Not like with what happened in there! She wouldn’t get married to avoid the social…problems that come with being a single mare. She’d do it because… Well, it would be so the foal could have a father.”

For a few seconds, Twilight thought about pressing the issue, then let it go. If it didn’t have to do with finding Rainbow, then it wasn’t important. He needed to focus on his fillyfriend. Everything else came second.

“Okay, let’s think about this for a minute,” Twilight mumbled as he breathed the way Cadence had taught him to help calm down a little more. “There can’t be that many places to get married in Cloudsdale, right? And it takes time to get married, right? And…well, Rainbow wouldn’t do something like get married without her friends there to support her, right? And she surely wouldn’t go and do something like get married without her parents, or aunt and mother, around to witness it, right? So…there’s really nothing to worry about an I’m just letting what Discord said get me worked up over nothing because he really is the biggest dick in Equestria, RIGHT?”

He looked on the faces of his friends with a hopeful expression, waiting for all of them to agree with his completely sound logic. But when Pinkie Pie was the first to speak, Twilight had a sinking feeling so bad he was afraid of falling through the clouds. “Unless Dashie just takes Soarin to one of those fly-through marriage places to make everything legal, then decides to go through with an actual ceremony afterwards. Oh! Or maybe she’s just here to grab Soarin, then she’s going to fly to Las Pegasus to meet up with her mommy and auntie to get married! It’s the marriage capital of Equestria you know!”

Twilight’s eye twitched as he heard the sense in Pinkie’s words.

A few strands of his feminine mane jutted out when he calculated just how much time that would actually take for Rainbow Dash to do if she was using her harmonic magic to boost her speed.

His entire body flinched when he pictured the Soarin and Rainbow together in a church just like he had seen moments before.

“But…but that means we only have five minutes to search every church, synagogue, mosque, temple and-”

Rarity’s hoof in his mouth stopped Twilight from saying another word. “Then I would suggest we get going.”

The office wasn't much to look at when compared to some of the higher ups in the EUP. Still, it was more than twice the size that any other pony got in Cloudsdale, a clear show of respect for the mare that was the leader of the primary Wonderbolts squadron.

Spitfire looked up from her autographing paperwork when she heard the door to her office slam open, and blanched at the sight. Although she had heard rumors about what happened with Tirek, and a few of the phenomenal stories coming from Ponyville in the past week and a half about Princess Twilight’s entourage gaining some new type of magic, the stories had made them all sound a little silly. After all, how could gaining a new hairdo and coat paint-job in the color of rainbows make anything seem less than ridiculous?

Sitting in the presence of one of those mares, Spitfire immediately changed her opinion of the whole thing. The amount of magic that seemed to make the air spark with and oddly tinted red lightning drew her attention away from the fact that she had cute little lightning bolts all over her body, and her wings looked like they had been submerged in a rainbow long enough to stain them. There was also the fact that her mane looked like something Celestia should be sporting, with the way the colors flowed and how it moved without a breeze running through it.

“Hey Spitfire!” the irate rainbow pegasus said as the air made the Wonderbolt captain’s hair stand on end. “I’ve been in your stupid waiting room for half-an-hour! I said this was urgent!”

The fact the air seemed to spark with every sentence like how the room just seemed to take on a sense of danger when alicorns got uppity made the Wonderbolt gulp. Okay now, calm down Spitfire, she told herself. You’ve had Celestia shout at you a few times over the years. Rainbow Dash is just a…angry fan that got into that little charity case reserve squadron. There was no need for her to be nervous just because she had a new look.

Although the fact that she currently held one-sixth of the magic that defeated more than half the mortal pony race, all of the alicorns, and Discord rolled into one did make her a little nervous. So the trembling knees on her back legs were completely understandable.

Still, Spitfire was a practiced soldier and field commander. She could not only keep her composure, but regain control of the situation easily enough. So, she raised an eyebrow at the…angry demi-goddess that could probably blow her up with a thought…and just shoved that little fact to the side before replying to her hundredth or so self-proclaimed biggest fan. “Well, you came here without an appointment, said Equestria wasn’t in any immediate danger, and I do have a lot of work to do, so…”

She looked up at the stack of autographed pictures that piled higher than her head, then over to the equally high stack that was also too tall for Rainbow Dash to see what the top page was. “But I suppose I can make time for you,” she told the pegasus with a little smile.

“Where’s Soarin?” Rainbow Dash demanded as the air in the room became a breeze that threatened to scatter Spitfire’s pictures. “I need to see him, now!”

Spitfire scooted back in her chair from the anger in Rainbow’s voice. She repressed the urge to gulp as she started to get a sinking feeling of what Rainbow wanted to talk about, and took a moment to steady herself for Soarin's latest fan-girl of a toy going postal. “I see. May I ask what this is about?”

The question only made the demi-goddess’s scowl become deeper as she approached the other pegasus to glare at her. “That’s between me, Soarin, and our foal that’s been flying first class inside me since we banged at the Equestria Games!”

After Rainbow’s reveal, something Spitfire had to admit she saw coming when Rainbow mentioned the stallion, her mind raced with the practiced speed of a military field commander to absorb all the related data in an attempt to tell how everything was fixing to play out.

The fact that Soarin had left Rainbow Dash with foal…wasn’t that much of a shock. Mares that didn’t get into his little…kink, tended to end up in the family way when he was done with them. For a Wonderbolt, that wasn’t much of a problem. The group's famous name, combined with their necessity in the EUP, the fortunes of the team members, and lawyers that could be hired with those fortunes made them pretty much immune to any scandal involving illegitimate offspring.

The fans that didn’t take a one-time payment to disappear and never bring up the matter again usually got more than the ones who tried to drag Soarin or Rapidfire to court in an attempt to get a ‘larger piece of the pie’ as Soarin put it. Even the mares that won such fights to grant support for the foal only got to rejoice in a hollow victory after lawyer fees took most of the first payment, and the rest was never delivered. Anypony who tried for more just went right back to court for more red tape.

Rainbow Dash didn’t fall into such a category, despite her status as a huge fan. She didn’t fall into the Wonderbolt trainee that was too great a flier for her own good type of box either, or even the kind of pony with enough bits to win court battles and follow-up cases involving lack of payment out of spite. She was a new type of mare, one that made every other little problem the Wonderbolts had managed to sweep under the rug seem like nothing… But, she was still Spitfire's problem since General Grease Ball had marked her to take over the Wonderbolts in preparation for his own retirement in the Caymane Islands several years prior.

She had the ear of Equestria’s newest princess, and was considered by most to be a high level of nobility with how she helped Princess Twilight Sparkle make decisions in court. As if one princess wasn’t bad enough, Spitfire had overheard more than once that Princess Luna considered each of the Harmony social group dear friends, and took extra steps to insure their loved ones were paid extra attention during her nightly duties; if Rainbow Dash had any need to call in a favor, there was no doubt in Spitfire’s mind that Luna would answer. Then there was Princess Celestia Herself, who Rainbow had a direct line to form that Spitfire had seen when a personal letter of correspondence from Rainbow Dash just appeared addressed to the princess in the middle of a top secret military meeting. The fact that she had actually taken time to read the stupid thing while all her other military leaders were trying to tell her of what would be an impending diamond dog invasion if it wasn’t headed off made Spitfire wince. She could even remember what the stupid thing said to this day when Celestia read it out loud so Luna could also hear.

“Ah it’s from Twilight’s more brazen pegasus friend. Let’s see. Dear Princess Celestia. During the past week I’ve been flying around being my usual awesome self, and this whole Mare Do Well thing happened, and I got to thinking. Even if you love doing something, you shouldn’t just ignore your friends. Rainbow Dash. Hmm, well that was…confusing.”

Spitfire shuddered at the possibilities if Rainbow wasn’t satisfied here, and decided to go straight to the top of the government. The Wonderbolts…all the fame, money, influence, and personal power that came with the title would be over. And that was only if one of the alicorns didn’t decide to step in full the level of righteous fury that hadn’t been seen since Discord had been defeated for the first time.

So, caught between a being that was probably more powerful than the majority of the pegasi race squished into one giant flying pony, and Celestia Herself, Spitfire put on her best kiss-ass smile and rose from her chair. “I think Soarin is still in his quarters. I’ll go get him for you.”

She quickly turned away and galloped through her office’s back exit, then took a sharp turn down the hallway and went out the door to fly across the open air training field that took up most of the room in the Wonderbolt’s station before she came to the male dormitories. Then she went inside the square cloud building’s third floor entrance and glared at the door to the lieutenant’s room while the sounds coming from the other side made it quite apparent what was going on inside the room. Spitfire steeled herself, then knocked the cloud door open to walk inside.

On the bed, she saw Soarin on hunched over of one of the plebes Spitfire recognized as Cloudchaser, thrusting his cock into her at his usual friction burn speeds. The wet slosh slosh sloshing sounds, made the Wonderbolt wince as the mare from the academy let out short cry after cry of both pain and pleasure while Soarin continued to pound her ridiculously wet hole as fast as he could.

“Soarin! Hurry up and get your sorry plot done, we’ve got a problem to deal with!” Spitfire shouted in anger as her wing-pony had his way with the filly.

For a minute, the light-colored pegasus his banging until he drew back for one final thrust and readjusted his forelegs to grab Cloudchaser by her cutie mark and hold on tight. “Gonna make me some…PIE!” the amorous pegasus yelled with a final thrust that smacked their hips together so hard it drove his mare’s head into the cloud bed before the stallion unleashed his seed.

When it was over, the younger pegasus collapsed in a heap, then rolled onto her back while Soarin pulled out his spent rod and frowned at Spitfire. “What is it Spitfire? I’m about to get to the best part!”

“Wha…t-there…there’s more?” Soarin’s newest conquest asked in a voice that tried to take in breath every other word.

He just reached down and stroked the mare’s mane. “Only the best part! I can't wait to-"

Tired of all the manure that had gone on, and the proverbial ton of it she was going to have to wade through in order to fix things, Spitfire’s temper snapped and she walked up to deck Soarin in the jaw hard enough to lay him back down on the bed. “Quit bucking around you idiot! We’ve got a real problem here!”

“But…m-my pie!” Soarin complained.

Spitfire shuddered at the mention of Soarin’s favorite sexual act and smacked him again. “I said shut up!” she ordered before turning on the filly that Soarin had just finished with. Why she let such things go on between him and the plebes...well, she knew why. Still, at times like this, Spitfire wondered if she couldn't just get rid of Soarin and to hay with the consequences. “And you, if you breathe a word about this to anypony, and I’ll have you're not only court martialed for attempting to lay with a superior officer, but I’ll make sure the general sentences you to magical draining and banishment from Equestria!”

The filly paled at the threat. Having been through the process before when she had fought Tirek, Spitfire knew the experience was worse than death for anypony, and so did the plebe if her reaction of wide-eyed terror and exit from the room as fast as she could was any indication.

“Spitfire you horse! That was cherry pie you just chased out my door!” he yelled. “Cherry!”

“Shut it you idiot! We’ve got bigger problems than some bucking virgin running out on you before you could finish your bucking sex show!” the higher-ranking pony yelled as she Soarin in the chest. “We've got a problem on our hooves. That bucktard Rainbow Dash is here, and a bunch of stupid nice words and a little gesture to get her off our backs isn't going to work this time!”

Soarin crossed his forelegs and let out a sneer. “Well I ain’t gonna do her if that’s what you’re wondering. Stupid ass wouldn’t even suck me or let me make some pie.”

The mention of his favorite sexual act made Spitfire suppress a shudder again. How in the hay he actually found ponies to go through with that more than once… Well, fame was a big part of it, she supposed. But she managed to get her mind out of the gutter and focus on the task at hoof before Soarin noticed. “You put a foal in her you idiot! What the hay were you thinking?”

If Soarin seemed worried by the news, he didn’t show it. If anything, the pegasus just got a little confused. “Huh, didn’t act like it back then. I-whoa, hold on a second,” he said while holding up his hooves. “I didn’t find anything in the room, it must have been a normal heat! Besides, you know she-"

“I know what you do to fans who don’t let you do your stupid pie thing you bucking idiot!” Spitfire exclaimed. “You think it wasn’t obvious? Headaches all this stuff causes me be burned in the sun! I should throw you to the wolves just for that!”

Soarin put his back up straight and looked down at her. “Yeah, well I know you and your brother buck each other! If you try and clip my wings, then I’m taking you down with me! No way they're going to let a pony who's into incest be a bucking role model! With that on top of the fixed racing, you'll be lucky to keep your wings!"

A stomp of her hoof knocked a hole in the cloud, and Spitfire fumed at the other pony. “You idiot! I’m not going to pursue charges against you! Rainbow Dash is! And if you go down, they’ll look into all of us! I’m here to make sure you give that bucking wannabe Wonderbolt whatever the buck she wants!”

“What are you talking about?” he replied. “Just give her the usual, if she doesn’t take it, we just tie her up in court like the others. Problem solved.”

Spitfire let out a cry of rage as she leapt at the other pegasus, pinning him to the bed and applying pressure to his neck. “Problem not solved you bucking idiot! This is an Element of Harmony we’re dealing with! She has a personal connection with three of the four members of our bucking pantheon! She can bypass the whole bucking court system in the time it takes to write a letter! Then Celestia starts an inquiry about all of us, finds out about all your little accidents and everything else we’re doing, and we’ll be lucky not to fry in the sun! And I swear if there is even the start of an inquiry, then I’ll make sure you’ll get your sorry wings clipped and shipped off to the Griffin Empire to be some flying lion’s personal sex toy! I did not work my plot off sleeping with every over the hill officer stallion I could during my time as a cadet to lose it all because one stupid pony wouldn’t keep his thing sheathed! UNDERSTAND?”

Soarin gulped, and Spitfire felt the ball of spit run down his esophagus. How easy it would be, to just make her hold a little tighter and get rid of her problem now. But then, Rainbow Dash would start asking more questions, and she couldn’t have that. “So you are going to be a good little pony, and go do whatever Prince’s Twilight’s little pet tells you to, or I’ll cut off those balls of yours and force you to swallow them!”

“But she has to have registered here! This is the last church in all of Cloudsdale!” Twilight
wailed as he looked at the sun priest with pleading eyes. A hoof came up to touch her shoulder, and the alicorn looked back to see his friends standing behind him. “Are you girls sure you check every place I marked on our maps?”

After they all nodded in the affirmative, Rarity spoke. “Perhaps this is a good thing Twilight,” the unicorn said, which got her a confused held tilt from the alicorn. “I mean, at least now we know Dash hasn’t gotten married yet.”

“Here’s a question. How come we just don’t let Rainbow get married, then tell her about everything so they can divorce later?” Applejack suggested.

“You mean aside from the scandal it would cause?” Rarity demanded. “Do you have any idea what kind of damage it would do to her reputation? Not to mention any chance at all she ever has of getting into the Wonderbolts…slim as it is now, would be completely destroyed! The poor dear would be crushed!”

Fluttershy was the next to chime in. “Not to mention the fact would never back out of an agreement like that. You all know how stubborn she can be.”

Although the two of them raised good points, it wasn't the best reason. Twilight supplied that one. "Because of the First Decade Law," he explained, getting confused stares from the rest of the girls. "Um...you know, the law Cadence pushed for at the last princess summit that we signed into effect throughout all of Equestria?"

More blank stares made the alicorn sigh. "You know, the law that states if two ponies are in love enough to get married and their emotions turn out to be less than true, then Cadence will use her magic to make them love each other for ten years to save their relationship? I understand Dash not knowing about the decree but-"

"WHAT?" Applejack yelled before looking over to Twilight, both rage and confusion written on her face. "What the hay kind of... You just... IS YOUR SISTER OFF HER BUCKING ROCKER?"

Twilight frowned at the outburst, even if Applejack was a little surprised, that didn't give her the right to insult Cadence like that. "What are you talking about Applejack?"

In all honesty, he really didn’t want to deal with infighting at the moment with Rainbow still missing, but if her concerns could be put to rest quickly enough, they might still have some chance of finding his pegasus. Where could she be? Is there someplace we missed? I hidden chapel? A wandering preacher? WHERE ELSE AM I SUPPOSED TO-

"You...ya kidding me Twi?" AJ yelled. "You can't just...make ponies fall in love with each other. Especially if they don't want to be!"

The misconception brought a frown to the alicorn's face as he was brought out of his thoughts. "Yes you can! Cadence does it all the time. She gets at least three couples a week!" Twilight had heard from his sister herself how many ponies came to her over time.

Maybe she was at someplace we looked, but in a waiting line or something…come on Twilight, think!

Applejack's mouth hung open at the alicorn's words. "Wha...it...you... Twilight, I can't believe you would go along with something like that!"

"I don't see what the problem is," Twilight replied with a frown as the alicorn was brought out of his thoughts again. It was a rather noble thing for his sister-in-law to do. Spells such as that took a lot of power.

"Don't...it...you..." The farm pony took a breath, visibly calming herself down as she did so. "Twilight, that's just...dishonest, and wrong! Ponies should be able to chose that sort of thing for themselves!"

Twilight frowned at the odd flow in her logic, not to mention the hypocrisy of Applejack's view. "They chose to get married Applejack!" he said with a frown. "And, I don't see how this is any different when I tried to use that reformation spell on Discord. You didn't seem to have a problem with mental magic back then!"

"But...it...you...GAAAAAAH!" Applejack shouted at the situation. "Okay, fine! This just...ugh! We need to find Rainbow, I get it!"

“Hey,” Pinkie spoke up, getting Twilight's attention while Applejack seemed to have some kind of mental breakdown. "How come we don’t know Dashie didn’t just get married under a fake name, like all super secret and stuff.”

“Because it wouldn’t be legally binding Darling.”

Twilight felt a wave of relief run through his body at Rarity’s words. Although, the last few words got a flick from Twilight’s ears as he realized something. The panic he had managed told down when he went back to the familiarity of his explanation started to rear its head and he consciously took breathes through his nose to help with keeping his mind focused. “The courthouse…Rainbow doesn’t need a ceremony, or even a chapel! She can just apply for a marriage license at the courthouse!” How in the hay could I have missed that!

“Isn’t that a little…uncouth?” Rarity asked as her face twisted in revulsion.

“And Dash cares about that kinda stuff how much?” Applejack asked the unicorn before giving Twilight a stink-eye. Although why she was so upset about Cadence doing her job like she had been for the past year, the alicorn didn't understand.

But, if Rainbow had gone to the courthouse with Soarin the moment she got to Cloudsdale, then…

“Alright!” Pinkie cheered. “That means we have time to stop for dinner before saving Dashie from making the biggest mistake of her life. Everypony okay with Manedarin? I hear the oranges are especially good!”

“Pinkie!” the alicorn and both non-earth ponies yelled before Twilight took up the berating of their friend. “Rainbow has gotten married to a stallion with my foal, and you’re making jokes? WHAT THE HAY IS WRONG WITH YOU?”

It was like everything that was going on was one big joke to the pink pony! Didn't she know if Dash and Soarin got married, everything was over? Rainbow would be trapped in a loveless marriage until Cadence came along and made them fall in love and...then…

For the first time in over a year, the pink pony scowled back at the alicorn. The sight actually made him break out of his spiral for a moment to listen to what she said. “Twilight, it’s a government building that issues licenses, and Dashie went there without an appointment. We could probably go there tomorrow and still find her and Soarin waiting in line.”

“We are rather slow here when it comes to paperwork, not enough solid clouds to hold enough desks, you see,” the sun priest of the church behind them supplied.

However, Twilight barely heard him. The purple pony was in the air when Pinkie said the word waiting. A second later, the rest of his friends were in pursuit. Although Twilight’s route was more direct, haste made him throw away most of what Rainbow had taught him about flying, and by the time he readjusted his trajectory twelve times and picked himself up from three crashes, he managed to catch up with the five ponies waiting for him at the door to the municipal building.

Once they were together again, Twilight led the way into the large building and looked around at the signs. “I’ll find out where the judges offices are, the rest of you ask around to see if anypony’s seen Rainbow.” Considering her coloration, Twilight doubted anypony who had seen the mare would forget her.

Okay let’s see…judges offices, judges…

“One of the guards saw Rainbow Dash flying into the third story where the courtrooms are a few minutes ago,” Rarity told him.

Not even bothering to finish reading all the various names in front of him, Twilight spun around to face the unicorn. “Great! Where’s the stairs?”

“Ummm, Twilight?” Fluttershy spoke up. “Pegasi don’t used stairs because we can fly. Every floor has it own door to the outside with its own balcony. We just fly up and start on the floor we need to be on.”

“That…okay, that actually makes a lot of sense,” he mused before looking over to his wings for a moment. In fact, Rainbow flying through the library’s window all the time back when Twilight had lived in a tree, or coming in through the balcony door more than she ever did through the front… GAH! No time for marveling over a new realization you idiot! RAINBOW IS GETTING MARRIED!

He led the way back outside, then looked over to his friends for a moment, and then up to the third floor. After considering their recent conversation track record and everything else that had happened in their relationship within the one bucking day they had been together, Twilight didn’t trust himself not to screw up any kind of reconciliation with the rainbow mare.

So he quickly wrapped his friends in his magic, and teleported them all to the third story balcony. Pinkie led the charge into the building, zipping from door to door opening them without any care as to what might be going on inside.

“Nope.”

“Not here.”

“Zilch.”

“Nada.”

“Naaaaaaa-HA! I found her I found-” was all the pink pony was able to say before Twilight teleported right behind her and found Rainbow Dash standing in the middle of an empty courtroom next to Soarin; who had just raised his head after he finished signing a document, judging by the pen in his mouth. In front of them stood a pair of ponies, one wearing a judges regalia, and the other sporting some type of business suit.

Time seemed to slow down.

Pinkie came into the room and jumped towards them with an outstretched hoof. “Noooooooooooo!”

Then before Twilight could do anything to stop Rainbow from sealing herself into at least decade of marriage with a stallion she wasn't foaling with, the pony in the business suit stepped forward and stamped the paper in front of them, turning it into a binding legal document.

Some part of his mind came to the conclusion that Rainbow had signed the marriage license before Twilight even came into the room, but at the moment, all he could think about was the fact that it was over.

He was too late.

It was…

Rainbow Dash had just legally married Soarin.

The End!

Author's Notes:

I would like to say thank you to all my beta readers who don't exist, my insanity for allowing me to concoct this thing my parents for never believing in me, and...

Yeah, that's about it.

Goodnight Everypony