The One You Can't Haveby Sir Hat
Chapters
Train
I leaned against the railing of the train’s fuel car, watching the steep landscape roll downward into the bottom of the canyon. I rubbed my face and brought my camera up. Snap, snap, two new pictures of this unseen land.
I let out a short sigh and let my camera fall against my chest, “Well...Transylmania...I’ll find a way to make you appealing, one way or another.” I looked back at the passenger car, watching the workers and soldiers get ready for their new positions under the new count.
I didn’t bother heading back inside, content enjoying the cold mountain air and the passing scenes. It was beautiful, fog shrouded mountains, lush coniferous green at the base of the canyon and a pale sunset cresting over the peaks.
“Human…” a royal voice snapped me out of my wonder, “who are you?”
I turned around, carefully watching my step and facing a dark navy mare with a sweeping mane. I looked her over, spotting the shoes and the tiara. “Oh, Princess Luna, sorry,” I bowed slightly, “I uh...was just taking some pictures.” I turned to valley once again, “It’s beautiful out here.”
Luna stepped next to me, overlooking the scene as the train puttered along. “Indeed. We chose this land for our subjects, due to said vista.”
I took a deep breath and held onto the railing. “I get it. It’s really nice up here.” I could feel us start to climb higher into the mountains. A thin layer of moisture coated the train as we pushed through a cloud. I checked my camera, taking another picture as we pushed past the fog, revealing a beautiful orange sky, white peaked mountains and a beautiful reflection off the clouds below.
A strange sound caught my attention. Swinging around I caught Luna raising the moon in the east. I snapped a photo, catching her with the crescent moon just at the tip of her magic covered horn, “Outstanding….”
Luna popped her eyes open, spotting me with my camera in hand, “Excuse me?”
I tucked my camera down and spun away, “Nothing.”
Luna walked over, standing to my side and craning her neck to look me in the face. “We heard you speak.”
I relented, sighing softly and turning on my camera, “Just a picture. I guess I should’ve asked permission,” I found the shot and held the camera for her to see, “But I didn’t want to risk losing it.”
Luna stared hard at the screen, taking it with her magic and bringing the strap against the back of my neck. I felt myself forcibly nuzzle her neck as she pulled the strap hard, “Hurk- Luna, choking!” I pressed my hands against her neck and tried to pull away, “Luna, can’t breath!”
The princess ignored me, turning the camera and yanking it against my throat, “This picture pleases me!”
I slid my fingers under the strap and pulled it away from my neck, “Well that’s great! I--” I was cut off as the strap pulled me tight against Luna’s neck.
Luna finally let off, bumping me with her flank and into the railing, “Tell us, what is your name?”
I caught my breath, rubbing my neck and leaning against the railing, “Jesus...I...bollocks.” I flubbed my words, leaning over the edge of the train and staring down into the foggy canyon, “Clark. My name’s Clark.”
Luna pressed her body against me, causing me to stumble into the edge of the railing, “We love your work, Clark the human!”
I grunted softly as I pushed against the railing. I managed to hook the heel of my shoe against a bar and push Luna away. “Dear god. I saw my death!” I rubbed my chest where the railing was digging in.
Luna cocked her head, “We do not understand.”
I rubbed my chest and stood tall, “Just a joke. I mean, you nearly strangled me to death with my own camera, but...yeah...a joke.”
Luna scrunched her mouth up, “We are sorry, we don’t find it humorous.”
I let out a defeated groan, “Yeah, it was pretty bad.” I rubbed the back of my neck and leaned my back against the railing, “So…did you need something else?”
Luna gave me a harsh look. “We were not aware we were disturbing you.”
I scratched my head, “You uh...you weren’t, but you’re a princess, I figured you’d have something better to do.”
Luna shook her head, “We shall ride the train like our subjects. There is no use arriving early.”
I rubbed my mouth as I stood upright, “I guess….” Things grew quiet between us. I turned towards the rising moon as the train’s lights flipped on. “So...you like...pictures?”
Luna nodded, turning away from the rising moon to look at me, “We have been known to enjoy art, yes. But your, pictures, are rather intriguing as well!”
I looked through my camera. “Well...do you wanna see some more?”
Luna smiled wide and nodded, “We would be delighted!”
I held the camera for her and started showing her photo after photo. “Man...I forgot I had some of these!” I flipped to a picture from Mali, “Whoa! I thought this one got ruined!”
Luna cocked her head, “Strange land.” She brought her hoof up and tapped the screen, “What is this orange?”
I laughed nervously, “That was a grenade.”
Luna nodded, “I do not know what this, grenade, is, but it looks spectacular.”
I laughed a little, “Well no one got hurt, broke my camera, but nobody died. So...I guess it was kinda spectacular!” I let my later peter out, hurrying along my photos. “Sweden...Mexico...F-Finland….” I flipped past it quickly, skipping over the mass of bodybuilders, “Ehem, so...the Finns like to work out.”
Luna levitated the camera to her eye. “We love the snow--” She stopped dead and fell into a harsh grimace. “We...are in your pictures.”
“Huh?” I pressed my head against her neck and looked at the screen. She was looking at a picture of last years winter wrap up. She was presiding over the ceremony in Baltimare. “Oh yeah, that was a fun day!”
Luna started giggling softly. “We are glad you enjoyed it!”
I nodded and started flipping through the photos. “I have a lot since I came to Equestria. There’s one from Ponyville’s election, the building of the parliament--”
“We are there again!” Luna squealed, prancing in place and laughing jubilantly, “We love this machine!”
“Uh...that’s--” I was cut off as a hoof wrapped around my neck, “Jesus!”
I put my hands between her hooves and my neck as she pulled my against her chest. “More! We demand more!” she stated, laughing like a schoolgirl and swinging me left and right.
I felt my legs thrown left and right as she hugged me, back legs and wings the only thing keeping her upright, and her forelegs the only thing keeping me from flying into the canyon. “No! Holy shit!” I stared down into the moonlite void, praying above all else to touch the ground again. “Luna, stop--”
Luna let go, throwing me over the edge of the fuel car. “Ooooooh my god!” I screamed like mad as the wind rushed past me. “I’m gonna die! Holy shit I’m gonna--” I stopped dead as something hit me from below, knocking my wind out and leaving me to the mercy of gravity.
“Clark the human, you must be careful!” Luna’s soft voice reassured me of my less than dead status. “We wish to have more pictures!”
“Oh my god...my heart.” I grabbed my heart as I dangled above the canyon. “Luna why!?”
Luna just shushed me and plopped me down on the catwalk on the fuel car. She fluttered down, leaving me to sit on the metal grate. “Clark, we wish to have a picture taken!”
I just laid on my back, holding my camera to my chest. “Luna, you just scared the dick out of me.”
Luna looked down at me. “Well insert the dick back into yourself! We require your skills!”
I laid my arms out, slowly picking up my camera and pointing it at her smiling face. “I don’t even care.” I took a few pictures, letting the camera fall against me as the flash ended.
Luna let out a pleased cry and yanked the camera upwards, pulling me along by my neck. She let out a giggle and nuzzled my cheek. “We love them! More!”
I just hung limp and put the screen back to the gallery. “Pictures...just...enjoy.”
Luna stayed quiet, slowly flipping through the pictures and laughing whenever she found one of her. “Clark the human, we enjoy your company!”
A cream maned bat pony peeked out of the engine. “Hey...so...Princess, human dude, we’re coming into the station.”
Luna yanked me upright. “Excellent!” She straightened me out with her magic. “Take a picture as we arrive!”
“Luna pl--”
“We want a picture!” She whined, prancing on her hooftips. “Please?!”
I stepped back, looking over the tantrum throwing mare. “Oh geez...well...you make it hard to say no.” I brought my camera up, snapping a picture of the dimly lit town behind Luna. “Uh...okay...so can I-” I decided to be blunt, “I need a stoic pose, something I can sell.”
Luna frowned hard, “This does not sound fun.”
“Luna...you almost killed me.”
She pouted hard, turning her nose to the town and presenting a proper profile. “Perfect!” I snapped a few pictures, one in particular catching her overlooking the castle in the bright moonlight. “Yes! That’s bank right there!”
“What is bank?” Luna walked over and looked at the picture. “W-- Myself, I, am bank?”
“Uuuuuh, sure.” I set my camera down and grabbed the railing. “This is gonna- Bu-bu-bup--” I fumbled my words as something warm pressed against my neck. It was unmistakable, the soft warm pressure of a kiss.
I slowly turned around, face burning slightly. “Uh...did you just--”
Luna leaned down in a flash, pecking me on the nose and turning away. “You find us, attractive. We enjoy your pictures, and…,” she ran her tail along the underside of my chin, “We would be happy to provide you with more.” her tone was heated, low, just sharp enough to show her excitement.
I just stood frozen, a conflicted erection half up as I turned towards the town. “I uh...wow….”
Luna walked down the steps of the train, swinging her flank for me, “We shall see you again, Clark.” With that, she flared her wings out and galloped through the sky.
I fell back against the fuel tank, staring at the navy alicorn bolt off into the distance.
“Duuuude.” A masculine voice broke the chirping of crickets. The train driver popped out of the engine and looked at me, “Makin’ a move on a princess?” he nodded slimily, “Aim high man, aim high and score big.”
I glared at the pony, “I didn’t, make a move, you dick! I just- ...oh god I was flirting wasn’t I?”
The driver just nodded, “Heck yeah dude, flirting with the lunar princess! You got balls man, you got balls.” he started snickering as he turned away, “Be careful man, otherwise those balls are gonna land right in her hoof…. In more ways than one.”
“Whoa what!?”
“Nothing dude, just...be careful man. There’s a reason no one courts the lovely lady Luna,” the driver quipped, heading into the engine and closing the door.
I stared at the door to the engine and pushed off the tank. “Court...who says the word court anymore?” I stepped off the train, landing with a heavy thud. “What the hell does court even--” I stopped dead and tripped as a long maned bat pony poked their muzzle into my business.
The bat pony peered at me from under her flowing yellow mane. “Viscan ira, krossa nova….” the mare trotted around me, judging me like a piece of meat, “Krossa di’ran karak?” She flicked her tail against my chest, “You like?”
“Whoa!” I crawled back a step, “Take it easy!”
The mare cocked her head, spilling her mane to the side and revealing a beautiful set of bright purple eyes. “Krossa amara soval’ik”
“Uuuuuuh,” I brought my camera up and took a picture, “Yes.”
The mare backed away from the flash, “Tovara!” She started shouting, drawing a small crowd around her.
I looked around as the mare rubbed her eyes. “Nope!” I knew a brewing shitstorm from a mile away, and I was going to get myself to the action quick. I ran to the workers as they unloaded building supplies and preserved food.
I snapped a few photos as boards of lumber were unloaded, large stones unloaded by a train crane. “Gold,” I muttered to myself, watching the yellow hard hats get to work. It was amazing, old meeting new in the pale moonlight.
I went to work, taking pictures and documenting the first contact with Transylmania in years. It was amazing, the locals started to avoid me but the landscape and buildings was enough to really sell this town as something amazing.
I went along, eventually bumping into Luna again, “Excus-- Clark the human!”
I laughed nervously, “Hey, Luna the princess...what’s up?”
Luna looked to the workers. “Progress! We have spoken with the count, supplied him, and shall be giving a speech on the dusk of tomorrow!”
“How-” I suddenly realized I hadn’t booked a hotel, “-great…. Hey Luna, is there any hotel in town?”
Luna just laughed, “In the town of Transylmania? Nay, not to our--” she stopped herself, growing a cat like smile, “Clark the human requires shelter?”
“Oh god--”
“We, Princess Luna of the Night, do formally request your company and skill for the morning!” She grew a lewd look on her face. “Perhaps we can make use of your camera for more, personal matters.”
I backed away slowly, walking across the empty lot they were unloading the supplies in. “Ha- ha- no...I’m uh...I’ll sleep in a cargo container.”
Luna jumped back with a look of shock on her face. “What!?”
I scratched my head, making sure not to trip on the various tools and supplies that littered the ground, “It’s not you…. I just, I have work to do, and getting tangled up with a royal seems like a good way to get caught up--”
“Auh!” She huffed angrily, “But we wish for your company!”
“That’s...great. But I’m really not--” I felt myself lift off the ground. “Whoa, what!?” I could see Luna’s face bearing down on me.
“We offer you companionship, and you scorn us!? So be it!” She pushed me back, throwing me across the unloading area and into a pile of boards.
I sat dazed for a bit, trying to regain my thoughts. Unsure of my physical health, location and where I landed. I tried to pull myself out of the mass of broken boards and plywood. All I could do was fumble and squirm in my wooden pit.
Luna ran over, looking at me. “We- we apologize!” she plucked me from the pile and sorted me out, standing me upright. “We saw you, and we- we were foolish!”
I held my head and fell onto my ass. “That’s okay! I don’t know what up is either!” I muttered hazily. I got onto all fours and stood. “I’m gonna go...sleep in the engine.”
I limped off, clawing my way up the steps and into the train’s engine. The bat pony natives stared at me with hungry eyes as I fumbled with the door.
The metal door swung open with a loud creak, the driver sitting on his cot and looking through a magazine. He shot upright and looked at me wide eyed. “Dude, I was smacking it!”
I ignored him and fell face first against the hard metal floor. “I just gotta sleep this off...pictures...morning.” I closed my eyes, letting the headache overtake me and leaving me to sleep off the pain.
Run!
I woke up to a loud echoy tapping. It felt like I was in a fishbowl and someone was tapping on the glass. “Euuugh….” I groaned, covering my face with my arms and rolling onto my back, “Why!?”
I flattened out, letting my arms fall against the metal floor. “My everything hurts….” I mumbled to myself, sitting upright and rubbing my bruised body. My last night’s tumble had left me battered and bruised, the back of my legs and my arms bearing the brunt of the damage.
I looked around the dull grey engine room. The levers and knobs freshly labeled and refurbished. I pushed off the floor, pressing my back against the door and looking around the room. I let out a soft sigh and started to turn to the door.
“Holy fuck!” I screamed, jumping back at Luna’s face pressed against the small window inlayed in the door. I clutched my heart as Luna nuzzled with window and smiled.
“Clark! You have awoken!” Luna cheered, tapping the glass with her hooves, “We wish to accompany you!”
I scratched my head and walked back to the door. “Luna...what?” I rubbed my eyes and looked out the window, the cool brisk night was burned away, replaced by a warm spring morning. The town was bright, the roofs a shining gold thatch, the walls a contrast black brick base and white plaster with timber frames.
I opened the door and peeked my head out. “Uh...I was just gonna go take some pictures--”
“Then we will keep you company!” Luna added, pulling me out of the train. “Come, while the count is still awake!” Luna pulled me into the air with her magic, running off the train and down the empty streets. I bounced heavily as she galloped towards the tallest structure in the town, a stone brick castle partially built into the mountain the town was seated against.
I held onto my camera as the empty dirt roads zoomed by. I curled up, trying not to bash myself on any passing workers or low hanging trees. I grumbled and moaned as Luna slowed to a prance, “Luna, I can walk! I need--”
“Ma’am!” A man in a dark navy hat snapped to attention.
Luna set me down on the path to the castle. “Guardsman, report!”
The two started talking, leaving me to take a few pictures of the castle road. It was wide, lined by peasant homes and a few shops. I snapped a few pictures of the pseudo medieval town. I taped a sign, making it swing and making the shot just that more ominous. “Creepy….” I snapped a picture and standing back, “People are gonna love this.”
I walked a bit down from the castle, taking a few pictures as a load of workers carried carts and wheelbarrows full of bricks and wood towards the castle. It was perfect, a wonderful display of foreign aid to distribute to the locals, and a great chance to showcase Equestria’s work force, and bolster their egos.
“Clark, we request a photo!” Luna’s voice boomed, catching me off guard and causing me to take a picture of a menacing patch of dirt. I turned on my heel, finding Luna smiling with two human guards at her sides. The two humans were dressed in ornate boxy uniforms, army caps, and two different pairs of sunglasses.
I let out a short cough as I checked the shot. “Uh...can you take the glasses off?”
The two guard grumbled, taking off their glasses and covering their eyes. The one to Luna’s side slipped me a middle finger for a moment before straightening out. It became obvious why they were mad. The duo was horridly pale, one crystal white and another a pale brown, and their eyes were practically shining in the harsh sunlight.
“Oh...ehem, three, two, one-” I snapped a picture and stepped back, “And one for the public, three, two, one.” Two pictures were taken, the guards hurridly put their glasses back on and Luna walked over.
“Show us.”
I flipped through the pictures, “Oh...I should have let them wear their glasses.” The duo’s eyes were reflecting a massive amount of light, screwing up one of the shots.
Luna poked her head in and looked at the picture. “Clark, we wish to obtain some of your pictures.”
I looked at her and stepped back, “Well that’s fine. I can send you a few prints whenever we get back to a printer.”
Luna shook her head, “Yes, we understand, but we wish to commission you as our artist!”
I adopted a concerned look, “I have a job...in the Crystal empire...I can’t really--”
“Excuse me,” A raspy voice cut me off, “It’s so damn late, can we get this started?” A man with a pure white complexion, glowing blue eyes and a trimmed mustache walked over, “So...you’re the guy right,” he pointed to my camera, “Let’s get this over with.”
I met the man half way, a small group of ponies trailing behind him. “Count Wesk?”
The man let out a long sigh and craned his head back. “Yeah, and like I said, I’m really freaking tired, can we just get this over with?”
I nodded and stepped back, “Noble family first, then a picture with Luna.”
The man nodded, gathering a two red maned mares around him, “This good?”
I nodded and took the picture. “Awesome. ...Hey can I just say, that stache is awesome.”
The man shook his head, “Not really my idea--”
A red mane bump him with her flank, “It looks good.”
“I know I just--”
“Uh...next picture? You said you wanted to get this over with.”
He nodded weakly and walked next to Luna, “So...this good?”
I moved around them, taking a bit of an angled shot. “Alright, maybe one more from behind, like you’re looking over the town.”
The man rolled his eyes and walked past me, overlooking the town, “You want my arm out or something?”
“If you want- wait, hold that!” I snapped a picture, the Count with his hand extended over the town, Luna staring out over the town as well. “Wow that’s-- I...I can’t use this.”
“What!?”
I looked up at the count, “Uh...look.” I held the camera for him.
He looked it over, popping his eyes wide open, “Uh….” he looked up at me, then over to Luna, then back to me, “Do you...want me to leave you two alone?”
I grimaced and looked down to the ruined picture. “Maybe a shot from behind was a poor choice.”
The mare just frowned at me, “She’s...showing...so...I’d say so.”
I let out a defeated grumble, “Well...I guess I can crop it. Thanks for the pictures.”
“Yeah, don’t...don’t worry about it.” he lingered around me for a moment, “Word from the wise, they like to hide in rafters...just saying.”
I scratched the back of my crown as he walked off, “Rafters?”
Luna butt in, smiling with a bit of a blush as she looked over the ruined picture, “Oh dear...we appear to have revealed ourselves.”
I stepped away from her, almost stepping on a red mane. “Oh, sorry.”
The mare looked me over, “Do you write the caption on these?” I nodded. “Great, than can you take one of me?”
I nodded again, taking any opportunity to get away from Luna. “What is this for?”
“Well...I just don’t want the bat ponies in Canterlot to be afraid…. So, make me look comfortable.”
I nodded and took a picture of her, head held high, against a thatch roof background. “Here, how’s this?”
She looked at the picture, a smile growing over her face, “That’s great, thanks.”
I gave her a small salute and walked towards the castle. The gate was manned by two long maned bat ponies, both in dark steel armor. I took a few pictures of them before joining another rush of workers into the main grounds.
The courtyard was filling up with workers and scaffolding. The main door was being taken off and set aside. I managed to take a picture as it was laid against the interior stone wall. “Clark!” Luan’s voice snapped, once again ruining a shot.
I spun around, “Luna!?”
“We wish to take more pictures with you!”
I looked at her, ducking a board as the workers went about their jobs. “You don’t say...well...I have a job to do so--” I was cut off as I was lifted off the ground once again, “Seriously!?”
Luna trotted daintily along, leading me through the town while I just levitated gloomily behind her. “Come, we shall find a secluded spot!” I tried to get free, watching as I was lead down a narrow set of streets and into a clearing. “We wish to know you,”
“No!” I screamed, kicking my legs and causing her magic to fizzle. I landed on my feet, stumbling a little but managing not to fall over, “I have to work! I can’t go off and pretend to have fun with you!” I made sure my camera still worked and turned away, “This is why I don’t like ponies! Always so needy!”
I couldn’t hear her approach. I simply found myself forced to the ground, Luna throwing all her weight against my back and keeping me pinned. “What the fuck!?”
“Shhhh,” Luna cooed, laying her stomach against my back. “We shall take care of you.”
I made sure not to crush my camera, barely able to keep from destorying it as Luna leaned her head down. “No!” I yelled, trying to get free.
Luna just kissed the back of my neck, sending a short huff along me as she whispered, “We wish to enjoy ourselves…please do not fight.”
“Oh fuck that!” I snapped, gaining just enough traction to scramble out from under her and into a wall, “Jesus Christ alive!” I pushed off the wall and bolted towards the work area.
“Clark, halt!” Luna demanded, bolting after me, at a severe disadvantage due to the narrow streets. “We demand your affection!”
“No no no no!” I chanted, bolting for my life. I tripped on an uneven patch of road and rolled into a cart. Planks and tools went flying as I pulled a pony along for the ride, “Holy crap!”
The pony let out a panicked yelp as we ended up in a small heap, “What the buck!?”
“Sorry!” I yelled, climbing out of the mess and running to the train. “Fuck, which way!?” I started yelling to myself, caught at a fork. I turned back to see Luna unfurling her wings and chasing after me. I decided heading left would magically see me safe, finding it the way out of the small village and back to the train.
My legs started burning as I raced down the hill, Luna gliding full speed after me. “Run Forrest, run!” A worked jeered, quickly getting taken out by Luna, “Holy shit...actually run dude, run for your life!”
“No shit!” I screamed, charging down the hill, using my momentum to stay ahead of her. I slammed shoulder first into a stack of lumber, knocking it over and slowing me to a dead stop.
Luna zoomed over, hovering just above me, “You, will, jo--” She was cut off as a pair of navy jackets tossed themselves over her. They pulled her down and pinned her legs, “Traitors!”
The man who’d flipped me off looked up at me, “You’re gonna want to leave, now!”
Luna just started screaming, trying to get free of the two night guards. Even more guard, pony and human, bolted over. “Go, don’t just stand there!”
“But--”
A guard with a rounded pair of glasses caught a smack to the face, “I saw her, try to-” he pushed his weight against her, “Run!”
I took the guard’s advice, climbing out of the lumber and into the train. I hopped a safety chain, running to the engine and slamming against the door, “Driver, open, now!”
The door flung open, “Bucking fuck, it’s like two p.m., what the fuck do you want!?” the driver asked, obviously not happy with me. He glared at me until spotting Luna, “Whoa...fuck.”
“Train, Canterlot, go go go!”
The driver bolted back inside, leaving me to join him. I lingered at the door, watching as Luna slowly forced free of her own guards, “Traitors all!” She threw a few off and stood, “Clark we demand your attention!”
I just ran into the engine and closed the door, turning a steel deadbolt and moving a box of magazine before the door, my mind not registering that it was an utterly useless act when compared the the lock. The driver started up the train and slowly got us turned around. “Come on you beautiful metal bitch, work!” He yelled, working the levers like mad and trying to get us going.
A loud thud cut him off. Luna’s head appeared in the forward windscreen, “Clark!”
“Jesus Christ!”
“We will be civil as soon as you comply!”
I grabbed the driver by the jacket, “Go, go go gogogogogo!”
The bat conductor threw me off, “I am, I fucking am!” He pulled a lever, causing the train to lurch forward. “Got it!” The train slowly chugged along, rounding the return track and nearly clipping the tail car as we looped around, “Come on…. Yeah!” the driver cheered as we started on our way back to Canterlot. “Wait…. We…” he looked up at Luna, glaring at us from the other side of the window. “But...this didn’t solve anything!”
“Just drive stupid! We can get some help in Canterlot!” I flopped down in the corner, feeling Luna watching me as we chugged along towards Canterlot.
She just stared angrily at me, watching me like a hawk and pacing along the front of the train. It felt like I was being watched by a rabid dog. I just stared ahead, watching the wall as Luna continued to stalk me from afar.
I just sat, sighing softly and settling in as we putted along. The driver nervously worked the machine, occasionally looking back to me with a nervous expression, “...I really hope she doesn’t know my name...like...normally if a celebrity knows your name it’s pretty cool, but I get the feeling she might banish me.”
Luna walked to the nearest window, “Bane.”
The driver just froze, slowly lowering his head, “Damn it…. I’ll miss you penis….” He looked to me, a few tears gathering in the corner of his eyes, “Do you mind if I...you know, before she cuts it off?”
I glared at him, “She’s not gonna cut your dick off--”
“Well can I masturbate in celebration then!? You’re fucking up my schedule!”
I started laughing as he shifted his back legs, “You have a jerk off schedule!?”
“Yes!” Bane snapped, slamming the machine with his hooves.
Things got quiet as I realized just how serious he was about this.
He just stared forward, his cheeks puffed out angrily, “I like to keep regular.”
I didn’t answer. I just sat there, staring at the wall as time started melting away. Little by little my ears popped, the temperature warming up as we slowly chugged into Canterlot. I stood up and rushed to the window as a bunch of pegasai started gawking at us.
I slammed my hands against the window, “Hey! Someone get help! Call Celestia, call the guard, call somebody!”
A pegasus bolted, leaving us as we slowly ground to a halt just off a platform. I stood staring out the window as a large crowd started to gather. Little by little important looking ponies and humans started flooding the scene.
“Hey...when do you think we’ll get out of this?” I asked Bane, clutching the metal wall of the train.
Bane just started pacing, “Dude I don’t know...my balls hurt.” he plopped down on the opposite side of the room from me and faced the wall. He stayed quiet and just laid his head against the wall. “...I don’t like you….”
I watched as Celestia herself started jogging over to the front of our train. I turned to Bane and shrugged, “Eh, I don’t think we’ll see eachother again…. Can you put out a restraining order on a princess?”
“Dude shut up.” Bane smached his head against the wall. “I just wanna feel good, and I can’t even do that.”
I turned to the window, watching the royal sisters argue on the front of the train. I couldn’t hear them, only garbled shouts and slowly saddening groans.
Little by little Luna backed down. Celestia shouted at her a few times, then turned to me. “Clark? I need to speak with you.”
“Is it safe?”
Celestia rolled her eyes and flew over to the door, “I was in the middle of tea time, then suddenly someone starts screaming.” she pulled the deadbolt open with her magic and slowly opened the door, “Normally I’d take this easy, be calm, but I spit tea all over the French ambassador and I’m really not in the mood!”
“Wait...the door--”
Celestia bit my sleeve and pulled me outside, “Look...she’s my sister, I get what she did, so just...she wanted a hug, then I’ll make sure she leaves you alone.”
I looked at her, “...I almost got raped, and you want me to give her a hug?”
Celestia let out a defeated huff, “Look, she’s just...really needy. You humans are either proving to be great mates, or terrible mates, and she’s...a little infatuated.”
“Infatuated!? She fucking mounted me!” I pleaded my case, Luna landing behind her sister.
Celestia eased her expression, “Just please, I’ll assign some guards to keep you safe, just give her a hug and I promise she’ll leave you alone.”
“No! Make someone else hug her!”
Celestia blew her mane out of her face, “This is a royal decree, you…. Clark….”
I rubbed my temple, “Dunn.”
“Clark Dunn, you are hereby ordered to hug The Night Princess Luna.” Celestia took a deep breath, “Please...for me. She won’t stop crying if you don’t.”
I glared at the princess. “You got fifty bits?”
“What!?”
“Do you have fifty bits?!”
Celestia got flustered as her horn lit up, “Unbelievable...what are you even going to spend it on!?”
“A new pair of pants!” I pointed to my mud stained slacks, “Damages incurred from the altercation!”
Celestia mumbled angrily as five coins floated from a coinpurse. “This is ridiculous.”
I took the coins from her, pocketing them and turning to Luna, “Don’t blame me, I’m not the bad guy here.”
“I’m not the bad guy, mee mee mee, you’re the only guy here!” Celestia jeered, getting a few strange looks for a pair of pony guards at her side, “Look...I just...I had a bad day okay?”
The guards averted their gaze, looking to the side and avoiding her gaze.
Luna slowly stepped forward, and hooking her leg around my back. She pulled me against her chest, forcing me to nuzzle her neck as her head reached down to my ear, “I’m going to make you mine…. You will love me, and we will have beautiful children--”
I pushed away, “She did it again! She- she fucking did it again!”
Celestia pushed me and Luna apart, “Fine, it’s done!” she turned to her guards, “You and you, make sure he gets home alright.”
The guards escorted me off the train. “Dear Celestia, man, what did you do?” a guard asked, starting to laugh, “Did you stick it in her?”
“Oh screw you! I just, I took a picture of her, I’m a freaking journalist!”
The other guard just started chuckling, “That’ll do it. Just enough push man, just enough.”
I grumbled angrily as I looked back, finding Luna staring at me. She spotted me looking at her and adopted a heated smile. She licked her lips, popping her mouth open and swishing her tongue back and forth.
I turned away, cringing hard at the deviant display. “How did she even learn that?! Auuurgh, screw it...just get me home,” I grumbled, slowly walking with the guards to the train north. It was horridly awkward sitting there, waiting for the train to come with Luna staring at me and making suggestive acts.
Dreams
I rubbed my head as I sat in my living room. Two days back with a series of nightmares later and my girlfriend was absolutely horrified. The mare of my life walked into the rather cozy sitting area with two cups of coffee, "Clark...you don't look good. Can't you see someone about this?"
I rubbed my tired eyes and took a cup as she sat with me, "I don't even know how to see!" I slammed the coffee and laid back into the couch, "Do I see a doctor for insomnia, or the guard for rape?" I let out a defeated sigh as Cold Stream sat next to me, "Babe...you know I love you...but I can't really talk right now."
Cold rubbed my knee with her hoof, "I know honey, I know. Just relax, try to get some sleep--"
"No!" I snapped, nearly jumping out of my seat, "She comes in my dreams...I can't sleep."
Cold glared at me, "You can't live like this! It's been three damn days! Just go see Cadance!"
I rubbed my head, "It's been two day--"
"Clark!"
"Alright!" I snapped, jumping sloppily upright and stumbling about, "I'll go see her...it's not gonna do anything, but I'll go and talk to her."
Cold smiled wide at me, "Thank you honey. Do you want me to tell Photo?"
"Photo?"
Cold's smile faded quickly, "Clark...you don't remember?"
I rubbed my aching head, "It's a little fuzzy...I remember...a phone call yesterday."
Cold nodded slowly, "It was Photo...she wanted your pictures...."
I leaned my head back, almost tumbling backwards, "Aw fuck.... I can't deal with this right now." I leaned against the nearest wall, almost decimating a coffee table along the way, "Jesus, Cold...I think I'm going to die," I rubbed my head and turned to the door, "You know how to get the card out of the camera right?"
"Yes, yes I do!" Cold stated proudly.
"Can you just give it to Photo? Tell her I'll write up the articles whenever I get this sorted out."
Cold nodded, walking over and throwing her foreleg around my waist, "Alright. Now go get help, before I have to fight a princess for you."
I rubbed my head as Cold's beautiful turquoise eyes stared at me, carrying a warm sympathy behind them. "Cold...I love you."
Cold just smiled, soft champagne colored mane jostling, looking absolutely beautiful against her dull crystal blue coat. "I know Clark." she let out a soft sigh, "Where would you be without me?"
I laughed tiredly, "Probably lost in some city, alone in some crappy apartment. Who knows, I might have left Equestria without you."
Cold shoved me, "Oh stop it. Now seriously, get going. Get this sorted out so we can finally have some fun tonight." she flicked me with her tail and leaned against me.
I gave her a halfhearted hug and walked out of my house. The streets of the Crystal Empire were full to the brim with ponies going about their days, a few humans dotting the crowd as things got underway. I joined the crowds and sloppily made my way towards the center of the city.
Little by little the roads grew larger and larger, leading towards the castle. Ponies and humans gave me a few strange looks as I entered the more open areas of the empire, growing more expansive and wide open around the castle. My head was spinning as I reached the grounds. I forced my way through a large herd and made it to the main entrance without dying.
Two pony guards stopped me at the door, "Purpose of visit?"
I scratched my head, my mind lagging behind rather harshly, "Uuuh... harassment?"
One of the guards cocked an eyebrow hard, "Alright then, but this seems like a guard matter so just-_"
"It's Princess Luna invading my dreams damn it!" I snapped, almost falling forward from the exertion, "I haven't slept in fou- two- oh fuck it, I haven't slept in days!"
The guards looked at me with a harsh glare. "Sir...do you need someone to take you to the hospital?"
I snapped, grabbing one of the guards and falling to my knees, "Dude...have you ever been raped in your dreams!? I'm not going back, damn it!"
The guard to my right looked horrified, nodding slowly and making room for me. "You uh...go ahead.... Sex crimes are on Cadance's priority list anyways."
I stood up in a flash. I felt like crying at his strange understanding, "Thank you...just...thanks."
I started up the steps, chugging along like a fat kid as my drained mind and body refused to properly coordinate. Little by little I charged up the steps, clawing my way up to the main hall and before the throne room door. I stood there, swaying like a drunk as the guards looked me over.
A human attendant walked over, holding her hands out carefully, "Sir...are you alright?"
I took a deep breath, my brain barely holding together from the constant throbbing, "I need to see...the princess.... Now."
The woman looked me over, "You need to get some--"
A pony guard peeked in from the stairs down, "Send him through...this is case thirteen."
"Oh- oh...that...yeah, I think she was gonna call for you anyways." she lead me to the throne room door and pulled it open, "Go on ahead."
I mumbled incoherently as I charged forth, my momentum carrying me from place to place as I stumbled down the bright blue halls. My head was spinning, my mind completely drained and torn apart from the lack of sleep, my dead appetite leaving me starved and terribly dizzy.
I managed to reach a few feet before the throne before falling. My feet slipped out from under me, sending me crashing to the floor. My hearing petered out, leaving me to lay deaf and immobile before the Crystal throne.
I slowly closed my eyes, my body giving up as a pink hoof stood before my darkening vision.
I awoke in a familiar place, "No...." I looked around, a warm spring rain over a small rolling hill, "No!" I screamed, scrambling to my feet and starting to run. "Not again damn it!"
I ran through the blurry fields, tripping on a root and slamming to the ground, "No!" I tried to claw away, my hands digging into the dirt. I flopped over, finding a jet black alicorn looming over me.
A wicked smile grew over her face, "This time, our night shall never end." she pressed herself against my chest, "You will be ours, forever." I felt my pants draw down as the onyx mare jammed her tongue into my mouth. I pressed against her neck, trying weakly to push her off.
I failed, my nightmare mare pinning my and sliding her body up and down my groin. The thick warm tongue forced into my mouth was horrid, slobbering like mad as my erection was instinctively brought up.
I felt a horrid wet warmth against my tip, my muscles straining to free myself. But just as I felt myself press against her entrance a wonderfully forceful voice snapped the mare back to reality. "Luna!" my princess screamed, slamming into the mare's side and sending her rolling off me. I was freed, quickly rolling onto my stomach and bolting a few meters away.
I watched as Cadence stood off with the nightmare, "Luna...you can't do this. You won't do this! Not to my subject!"
I felt my heart start racing as the duo flared their wings out, "You will not keep us from him!"
Cadence stepped forward, "Luna...you can't do this." She folded her wings, levitating me out of my hiding place and across the strange grassy dreamscape. "This isn't right, it's not legal, and it's so wrong."
The nightmare faded to black smoke, quickly rematerializing into Luna. "We...we wish for his company, but he ignores us!" She stepped forward, "We love you...do you not see this?"
I felt my breath pick up, my rage filling my throat, "You fucking raped me! You tried to rape me in Transylmania! You couldn't get me in real life, so you fucked with my head!" I ran at her, grabbing her by her throat, "You're ruining my life!"
Cadence plucked me from her setting me beside her, "Luna...he's not your subject. Even if you invoked Royal Law, he wouldn't be yours." Cadence stared Luna in the eyes, "Auntie...you need to stop. He has someone special, and you can't just take that away, or try to enforce your rules in my land."
Luna's face contorted into a series of horrifying displays, "You will love us...and you will see how happy we could be!" she screamed, stomping her hoof and lowering her head, "We will win your heart...we know we will."
The dream slowly faded away, Cadence lingering by my side as I shrunk down, becoming a grain of sand in an ocean of giant grass. I could feel myself rest, my body repairing and slowly returning to reality.
I snapped awake in a soft white room, letting out a sharp gasp that made a pony jump upright. "Clark!" Cold Stream had been laying across my legs, "Oh thank Cadence...." she threw her forelegs around my neck, "They told me you collapsed, I came as soon as I could!"
I held her head against my chest as I looked around. I was in a hospital room, an IV dug into my left arm. "Cold...what happened?"
"I--"
"I can answer that." Princess Cadence peeked into the room and walked over to me, "Clark Lowell, you are hereby ordered to remain in the Crystal Castle until your case has passed from our courts into the high court of Canterlot." she adopted a grim look, "I saw what was going to happen...I'll do my best to stop it, but I can't make any guarantees if you go home."
I looked down at Cold's crystal mane as she kissed my bicep. "...So what, I'm under house arrest?"
Cadence licked her lips, "I think it would be safer that way--"
"Well I agree." I played with Cold's ear, rubbing her thing skin between my fingers, "Can we...still--"
Cadence chuckled slightly, "Yes.... Believe it or not I can feel love, and being around you two...it's quite calming."
I took a deep breath, "Trust me...the feeling is mutual." I stopped playing with Cold's ear and extended my hand, "Hoof?"
Cadence smiled and put her hoof in my hand. I brought it to my lips, giving it a quick peck and letting her go, "...That was...formal."
I looked Cadence dead in the eyes, her smile growing wider, then fading completely, "You saved me tonight. I don't know what you think that means, but I'm at your service whenever you need me."
Cadence smiled assertively, "You know...since you humans showed up, it seems like everypony's finding someone to love. It feels good...and you saying that...." she chuckled, "I'm a married mare and you just made me blush...." She took a deep breath and fixed her mane, "Well, I'll leave you two alone. You can stay here until the morning."
The door to my small slice of sterile safety swung closed, the white curtains fluttering in the breeze. Cold looked up at me, her eyes just as beautiful as before, "See...I told you she could help."
I nodded, watching as she crawled into bed next to me, "Yeah...I knew, I just.... Thanks for the push."
Cold Stream snuggled against my side, hugging my chest sideways and nuzzling her neck along my shoulder, "Clark...I love you...I'd do anything for you. So when you're being stupid, I'll be sure to put you back on course." she took a deep breath, her chest expanding and pressing even more of her body against me, "Now let's go to bed...have a sweet dream for once...."
I kissed her crown and looked around, finding a lamp at my side and shutting it off. The white room quickly growing slate grey as the sunset lowered in the far off distance. "It's gonna be easy with you...." I kissed her crown, moving my hand from her back to her flank, "I love you."
Cold just giggle, "I know...."
Things were slightly quiet, "That's it?"
"Yep...because you shouldn't need me to tell you by now." She nipped at my neck, "You should know I'll always love you."
Bite
I stared out the window of the hospital, "You know I can leave on my own, right?" I grumbled as a crystal pony started wheeling a wheel chair towards me. "This isn't necessary."
The mare cocked her head a single sharp time. "Hospital policy. Everyone leaves with an escort, and in a chair...."
I groaned exasperatedly. "Ridiculous." I slid off the bed, grabbing my shoes and plopping down the in chair. "There, happy?"
The mare shook her head, her glistening mane staying in place. "Not really, I think it's stupid too." She started pushing me off through the halls, towards the exit. "Anyways, why were you here?"
I scratched my head. "Don't ask. This whole big thing with a lot of shit going on. Just...if you ever get asked to take pictures of the moon goddess, don't."
"Noted." The mare kept quiet, leading me towards the discharge area. The entire ordeal was over, I could go back to living normally, and Cold was waiting for me at home. It would be good to get back to the normal grind for once, instead of possibly getting ruined or raped or both.
I was wheeled into a small office and left to sign a bunch of papers. Little by little the papers were signed, my health assured. I was still a little worried, but knowing the local royalty was siding with me was enough to keep me from living in fear. I signed everything I needed to, put my shoes on and stepped out of the building.
I stretched out my arms, looking out over the bright white tundra that surrounded the borders of the city, the crystal spires seemed brighter than ever and knowing I was about to head home and spend a calm, peaceful day with my marefriend.
I looked down the finely kept dirt roads, ponies going about their mornings. It felt clean, and after such a good night's sleep I was ready to get back into the swing of things. I started off down the road, heading towards the market.
The bright far north morning was amazing, the cold air coming from the north smooth against the summer heat. Even this far north things still got a bit warm. It was perfect weather for a scarf, and I was feeling a bit loose with my money after everything I'd dealt with in the last week alone.
I hurried along towards a small shop, the crystal ponies' style of clothes were rather scares, the ponies preferring to stay nude and show off their coats. Finding a scarf in town would be easy as could be. And as the vibrant crystal masonry grew denser, the buildings more close knit and more urban I found my prize.
A small store with a little toy cat hanging from the doorway caught my attention. Cute as it was already, I knew this place. The owner was a fay stallion and a good friend of mine. And so without much thought I pushed past the solid crystal doorway and into the warm shop.
I started looking through the racks of clothes, pony apparel taking up the majority of the shop, but a scarf was a scarf, pony or otherwise. The shop was mostly empty, a few ponies browsing but the ponies were spread out enough that things weren't crowded.
I picked a neat looking scarf, running my fingers along the silky material. "Sir...." A raspy voice called me from the side. I turned my head to meet them, a pony in a soft beige hoodie. "Mr. Lowell?"
I took a step away from the pony. "Uh...can I help you?"
The pony looked up at me, showing me a pair of bright magenta eyes behind a red mane. "Hori-da" the pony whispered, lunging at me and sinking their teeth into my forearm.
"Jesus!" I snapped, stumbling back and knocking down a row of coats. "What the hell!?"
The pony bolted out of the shop, jacket fluttering as the pony fled. "Hey! Hey!" A dull silver crystal pony ran out, leaning out of the shop and shouting. A pair of ponies found me laying in a pile of coats and did what they could to help me up.
"Hey are you alright?" One asked, gingerly lifting me up.
I couldn't hear anything, everything was near silent. I was frozen, staring at two small bite marks on my forearm. Two perfect circles dripping a minute amount of blood. I turned my arm over, finding the same marks on the other side of my arm. It burned, the four pockmarks burned like fire.
I grabbed my arm, stumbling hazily towards the door outside. "Hey, hey are you okay!?" A mare shouted, following me to the door.
I held my arm limply, staring at the bleeding marks. I had no idea what to do, I was hurt, but I had just left the hospital. I couldn't go back, I had to get home, it wasn't that bad.
I could get home, wrap my arm up and sleep it off. I could sleep in my own bed, I could have a wonderful dinner and get back to work soon.
I hurried down the path towards home, my arm starting to burn white hot. I could feel myself sweating, my brain going wild as I stumbled towards home. I had no idea what I was going to do, but I knew I couldn't stay here, and I knew home was waiting for me. A beautiful bronze maned pony was waiting for me. I had to get there, I had to find Cold Stream and I needed to fix this.
"Hey, hey do you need help!?" A pony ran up to me.
I ran my hand over my forehead, sweat dripping off my body. "I- gotta go home, need some water." I mumbled, my shoes losing traction and sending me to the ground. I stopped my face from hitting the ground with my arms, the cuts on my arms half healed, almost gone. Only a bit of dried blood and a burning sensation leaving me completely immobile.
I wanted to go home. I was supposed to be safe, I wanted to be calm and happy, not dying in the road.
Blood Ties
I jumped awake, my breathing rough and shallow. The air was cold, the room pitch black. Yet I could see, strange faces, all asleep beside me. Cold Stream, her family, a doctor in the corner of the room flipping through charts. I tried to sit upright, Cold's body laid sideways against my chest kept me pinned. "There isn't much we can do," the doctor mumbled, looking up to me. "I don't know who you pissed off, but this isn't just a bite."
I rubbed my arm, the two pinprick still there. "What? Bite- oh...oh right."
The doctor hopped down from his chair, setting the clipboard down in his place. "It's not even poison. It's a potion, fangs dipped in a potion." He walked up to my side, letting out a soft huff. "Someone bit you in plain sight with a coating of potion on their fangs, just to do this to you." He rubbed his face with his foreleg. "This is truly impeccable."
I took a deep breath, feeling something sharp against my lip. "What? What happened? Why the hell am I in the hospital again?"
The doctor looked off to the side. "Are you aware of Equestrian humans?"
I scratched my head, my hair strangely soft. "What? Like, people that live here, yeah."
The doctor shook his head. "Not quite. Ponies have been trying to, for lack of a better word, assimilate humans into different lives." He walked around the edge of my bed. "A human in Saddle Arabia can be changed, their skin will be darker to compensate for the sun, their hair will grow coarse and thick to compansate for the lack of water. A human in Fetlock will grow up taller and stronger, Cloudsdale will walk on clouds and have lighter bone structure. We've been researching this since your kind arrived, and now," the doctor put a mirror on my leg, "I'm sorry."
"Sorry- what? What happened?" I shouted, causing the room to stir. I scrambled for the mirror, pulling it up to my face. Despite the darkness I could see it all. My skin was no longer brown, the color washed out completely to a soft white. My teeth were sharp, canines turned to fangs overnight. "No!" I screamed, touching my face. "No, Jesus fuck no!"
Cold Stream snapped awake. "Clark?"
"Oh dear god my face! My skin, what the hell?" I shouted, my heart beating like wild. "What happened to me?"
The doctor took a deep breath. "Bat ponies, that's who did it. I can only come to the conclusion that's what's happening to you." He lowered his head. "We've already contacted Canterlot. They'll be here to take you there for treatment soon."
"No!" I shouted, causing the room to snap awake. "I can't go!"
"We can't treat you here." The doctor explained, walking to my side. "They might have something to help you in Canterlot. And unless you're willing to live like this permanently, I don't know how much there is I can do for you."
I clutched my head. "Oh god, no, no no." I sank back into my bed, clutching my forehead. "I took pictures, I was nice, I tried to get away from her. I know it was her!" I pushed out of my bed in a flash. "Who else? I- I go to that medieval city, I- I take pictures. They had people like this, fucking vampires! I can't!" I jumped out of the bed, Cold Stream rolling onto her side as I rushed to the door. "I can't go back!"
I ran to the dark hospital room door, pulling it open in one sweep of my arm. What stood beyond the door was hell, a trio of ponies standing before me in the dark hall. The smell of bitter chocolate filled my nose as Luna stepped forward, flanked by two bat ponies. They stood in the darkness, sharp eyes staring me down. Luna stepped forward, smiling at me. "Clark, hello."
I felt my heart sink, my arms and leg grow weak, my eyes burn as I tried to speak. I dropped to my knees, face to face with my horror. I didn't know what to do. "Please no."
Luna walked proudly over to my. "We understand your changes will be difficult, we will be here to help you." She wrapped a hoof around me, pulling me against her neck. "Now I believe it is time we go. We have a home waiting for you."
I felt cold, my life seeping away as I stared at the foreign ponies standing before me. They wore strange clothes, something medieval, something I'd seen in Transylmania. "I can't." I mumbled, deaf to the screams of my family.
Luna held me against her, the ponies marching past me as I was dragged into the hall. "You'll be safe."
I could hear the muffled shouts and cries as I was dragged away from my mare, my life, my home. I was a monster now, my life was pulled out from under me and I couldn't protest. I was a pale fanged freak, and soon enough I would be used by the princess as nothing more than a play thing. My camera, my life, everything needed to burn.
I watched as I was laid down, a pair of bat ponies holding a stretcher for me. Luna leaned down over me, kissing my hand. "We appreciate your acceptance." She walked out of view. "Time to head back I think."
I watched the dull tundra sky rise, the ponies carrying me flexing their leathery wings and lifting us all into the air. I wanted to scream as I was carried south, I wanted to kick and free myself. But I could only sit there, something weak and petty, something changed and less than human. I was a monster, and I could only hope the princess would grow bored of my quickly and end it soon.
Mare Of Iron
I fell against a door, shuffled about by a pair of bat ponies. "Here, room." One pushed the door open, revealing a softly lit room. It felt like a hotel room from hell, dim, boring, dull. "They'll be somepony else to stay with you while you're here," The lead pony said, backing out of the door and leaving me laying across the cold wood floor. I didn't know what to do. I couldn't think, I could only lay on the floor and wait until I had my chance to slit my own throat.
Time lost meaning as I laid across that floor. I just waited, and waited, letting the cold settle down upon me. It was pleasing, the cold meant I was alone, the cold meant I wasn't being tossed about like the princesses' living sex toy. That's all I was now, no longer a photographer, no longer a journalist, I was dead. I was an object, and I couldn't bring myself to pulling the trigger and ending my gutted life.
I couldn't go back. I couldn't see Cold again. All I could do is wait and try to rid my mind of the wandering abuse, the train, Luna's body. My skin creeped as I thought back to the train, I couldn't escape it, and now I was in the lion's den.
"Oh Da'dara human?" A strange chilling voice echoed around the room. "You, no speak, Thestrali?" It asked, taking shape into a dark grey mare with a deep royal blue mane. "Suppose not." I stared at the mare, her hardy frame unfamiliar, unusual compared to any other bat ponies I'd seen. "Hello?"
I couldn't move, but I could watch the mare pace about me. "Hmm, strange creatures."
"Speak...English." I hissed, trying to push myself up. I pulled myself along the ground, my legs refusing to respond as I grew angry. "Well? You gonna speak?"
The mare turned to me, showing off a strange metal piece wrapped around her torso, a deep blue cape hanging off her flanks like a skirt. "I try, hard. You, learn Thestrali."
I felt my face twist as the mare walked past me, looking over the two twin beds in the room. "I should learn? I should- you're from fucking Transylmania, aren't you?" I grabbed hold of a dresser and slowly pulled myself upright. "One of the freaks from the mountains."
The mare turned to me with a twirl. "Freak? I live a life in Equestria. You, you live different life. You tell me, I freak?"
"Shut, up--"
"Perhaps you are the freak!" She shouted, her words clunky but sharp. "The outsiders, I know of you. Count is you, Count is decent one. You, you reek of sweat."
I felt something snap inside of me. Her reminder of my scent, it tore out a piece of my chest, breaking a rib and leaving me with the aching pain of death in my body. "I know...." I slowly slid back down the dresser, "Oh god...I know...." My eyes blurred as I flopped back against the ground. I could hear strange noises leave my mouth, I couldn't control them, I could only lay there and whimper.
The mare's hooves tapped loudly against the ground, her iron clad form eventually popping into my view. "Crying. Why crying?"
I splayed out, resting myself against the cold ground. "Don't."
The mare cocked her head, her long mane hanging just above my face. "Help?"
"Shut up!" I shouted, trying to roll onto my front. "Just leave me be!"
"I help." The mare reached down and bit my shirt. "Come, I help." The mare pulled me along the ground, surprisingly strong. I just let her, I couldn't fight back. I watched the ceiling pass by, a strange lantern swinging back and forth before disappearing out of view. "Bathe?" The mare asked, still half chewing on my sleeve. "Bathe?"
I felt the wood transfer to tile, the ceiling change from beige to white with a vent instead of a lantern. The clopping of hooves grew sharper, more peircing as the mare let me down and looked back towards my face. "Bathe?" She asked again, wearing a soft frown. "You bathe, yes?"
I looked up at the mare. "...I bathe, yes."
The mare smiled at me. "Good, yes?" She brushed her metal chest-piece. "Good. I, Feros, power mare. You?"
I felt my breathing slowly come back down. "Clark."
The mare smiled wider, closing her eyes and nodding. "Yes, good. I go now. You bathe, we speak."
I watched the mare slowly walk over me, her weight causing me to wince as she stepped onto my groin. But her steps were heavy, mean, not falsely trying to comfort me. It felt real, and I felt it. I could feel a warmth in my stomach, resonating out from her steps. "...Thank you."
Happy
"Are you happy?" Feros asked, hanging off her bed as I was dragged back inside by my handler. "...Clark, how is voice?"
I slumped against the floor, reeking of sex and sweat. "I don't...know--"
"Bathe?" She asked again, her metal chestpiece sitting on the floor next to her bed. "Want bathe?"
I huffed softly. "I can't move...." I felt numb, my limbs refusing to respond. "...Yes, help me please."
Feros nodded. "Yes, I help." She hopped down from her bed, trotting proudly over to me. "How is?"
"How is what?" I asked, watching her take my sleeve in her mouth, slowly dragging me along the floor on my back.
"Life," she clarified. "How is, life?"
I huffed angrily. "Bad. Just found out I got kidnapped.... I'm getting letters shipped to me from back home, can't send any back, but they're letting me have the ones getting sent to me." I felt myself pass over the hardwood and onto the tile. ".... I'm in the dark here, waiting, for something." I stared up at the vent in the ceiling. "They're talking to Cadance...arguing about archaic laws and retinues. I don't even know what the fuck a retinues is!"
Feros pushed the valves open and flooded the room with steam. "Rusva, an...how you say, escort, guard, following."
I huffed softly as Feros mounted the side of the tub and slowly pulled me upright against it. "It doesn't matter. I know what I have to do."
"Hmm? Which being?" Feros asked, her raspy voice muffled as she pulled my shirt off. "What is plan being?"
"Regicide." I stated, "Clearer heads prevailed, and in honesty I can't really see another option. She's not going to let me leave of my own accord."
Feros frowned hard as my shirt popped off. "Lady Luna?"
"Who else? I mean, I'm stuck here because of her! Because she's so out of touch she can't see the line of right and wrong anymore!"
"And can I?" Feros asked calmly, "I- how you say. I come from old land. Different, cultures, many different. Luna, banished many years. Take time to fix." Feros stated, hopping down to help take my pants off. "Worried, very worried."
"Don't be." I felt some feeling return to my fingers. "Here, I think I can handle it." I brushed her away, taking my pants in my own two hands and undressing. "Just, help me up?"
Feros hurried under my arm and hoisted my up, her coat soft to the touch. "Hurt is not good plan." She was a decent size for a pony, not nearly as tall as me even on two legs, but still tall enough to help me upright. I used the edge of the tub to stand up. "Hurt doesn't change, only ends."
I held myself up, shaking violently. "I have to do something. I hit the bottom, I can't let myself go lower."
Feros hopped into the tub, offering me a now wet hoof. "I fight much. Many fights. Some die. Never good, only needed." She looked to the door as I stepped over the short wall. "I think Luna, not required hurt."
"What then? You'd just have her keep hurting me?!" I shouted, settling down in the hot water apart from Feros. "I can't!"
Feros looked at me, bright blue eyes burning me for my violence. "I kill. Sword, lance, axe. Regret many, only few I can say were good." She started to step out of the tub. "Luna, Luna not malice. Luna as us, different, change with time. Words better weapon. Fewer regrets."
"Wait!" I shouted, reaching limply towards her. "Stay...talk with me."
Feros snapped around, her back leg still stuck in the tub. "...You bathe, you want me around?"
"Please...it's nice talking to you."
Feros stepped out of the tub, spinning around to face me dead on. "Flattered."
"Don't be." I settled back, my numb body waking up as I thawed. "I just...I don't know what else I can do. Monarchies, they're arbitrary at times. I mean, old laws, that didn't need to be changed, they still apply. Doesn't mean I'm happy with them, but it means anything I can do is going to get railroaded into the ground." I rubbed my face with water. "Cold Stream...I told her to move on if things ever got this bad. I really loved her, but I can't let her see me like this, I can't force her to deal with all this. It's not fair to her."
"Cold, your wife?" Feros asked, sitting down on the floor, keeping eye level with me.
I shook my head. "We were dating. But now, I mean look at me!" I held my arms out. "I can't go back to her like this! I love her...I know she loves me. But as stupid as it is, I'd rather leave her with some good memories, instead of living like this for her." I rubbed my face again, the hot water lovely against my skin. "I have to focus anyways. I have to get these letters out. I have to get help, and if I have to slice someone apart to do it, I will--"
"Happy?" Feros asked, "Will be happy?"
I stopped dead. "No. Nothing about this is happy." I shook my head as my hands sank into the water. "I have no power over her. The most I can do is stay alive until Cadance figures this out, or I lose my shit and kill someone." I slapped the surface of the water. "Apparently I'm here indefinitely, because some shitty disease control law lets whichever royal finds me keep me, quarantined. Apparently the bite was considered an infection." I shook my head even harder. "Amazing how when they're the ones writing the paperwork it's not an attack, just an infection."
"Violence, make happy?" Feros asked again, staring at me. "I help if so, but--"
"No!" I shouted, flinging water at her. "No. I need to do this. I have a plan, I have a way to get what I need, I just have to wait." I took a deep breath and rubbed my chest. "I'm strong. I'm tired, dazed, still don't actually know where I am or what's going on besides they're looking into it. But I can outlast them, I have to."
Feros nodded. "Strong, with friend?"
"Huh?"
Feros tapped her hoof on the ground. "I friend?"
I stared at the mare. "Yes," I stated with absurd clarity. "You're my friend."
Feros smiled softly, her ears falling back. "Thank...you. Few friends, many dead." She held her hoof against her chest. "Glad, friend."
I smiled back at her. "Me too." I looked around the room. "So...you...don't think I should be violent?"
"Words, hurt more than steel. Deeper pain." She looked out, staring at something far off beyond the walls. "Be strong, but be fair, calm. Speak with authority and defend, never attack."
"You're talking about the rape...." I sank back into the tub. "She's stronger than me. There's not much else I can do, my body goes into auto pilot, it's not like I can force myself not to--"
"Push back!" She shouted. "Push, do not hurt, push!" Her mane swept itself back as she spoke. "Scream, be angry, show! Show hurt, show it! Words, Luna happy you touch her, but Luna is...a fool. She need word, touch, more than you give, more than you want to give. Perhaps, more than is deserved. But words, words may sate, and better to have tried, no?"
I stared at her, snapping my head to the still water I was sat in. "...What am I going to say? Stop didn't work very well--"
"Is not word that is problem. Is tone. Stop, is different than stop" Her voice was heavier, with a deep thud to it. "Be stronger, if not in body, then in voice." She shook her head. "Human think one way, take practice to think another."
I ran my tongue along the inside of my lips. "I'll see. But I'm taking it--"
"What is, it?"
I took a deep breath and pointed to the toilet. "In the cistern."
Feros snapped around, wheeling herself towards the cistern and peeking inside. "Oh...I can see."
"A maid knocked over a vase. I grabbed the biggest chunk I could when I was getting dragged back."
Feros turned to me. "...Happy?" She looked down, a pained expression on her face. "I help you, be happy?"
I stared at the mare. "...I don't know. I'm not sure what you're--"
Feros looked back up at me. "Do I make you happy?"
I stared at the mare. "I- yes? I wouldn't ask you to talk with me if you--"
"Leave in water." She tapped the toilet. "Please, if I make happy, leave in water. Make me happy."
I stared at the mare, steam hanging low between us. "... Maybe."
Cut Out The Heart
Time felt blurry, the constant waking and sleeping felt endless. I could barely discener the days from one another, each one marked by either rest, abuse, or a chat with Feros.
I stared at Feros as she pulled the Equestrian flag off our wall. "Clark, sure?"
"Oh I'm sure. I doubt anyone will get the symbolism, but nineteen-fifty-six was a hard fought year!" I took the flag from her, quickly pulling it over our floor, the twin alicorns linked in a circle on the front were about to get a littler altercation. "Feros...the knife."
Feros turned to her bed, scurrying over and pulling a sword from under her mattress. "Here, sharp."
I looked at the sword, a strange hilt fit for a pony's mouth. "Uh...honestly, this is a bit overkill."
Feros shrugged. "Is...how you say, what I have."
I frowned hard. "Your English is coming along.... How long have I been here again?"
Feros rubbed her head. "I arrive in summer, leaves are fall--"
"Okay...I get it." I had to stop her quick, my gut was already churning from the thought of my lost time. "Now...you know what to do when she gets here?"
Feros turned to the door. "I go...I find the sun goddess."
I nodded, slowly sinking the sword through the thin flag. "She didn't listen to Cadance, and she's stonewalling any investigation. Talking didn't work-" I held my head, "-god, I can't even remember what I tried to say. I think...it helped. Less violent that night. Crying, someone was crying."
Feros looked me up and down. "Clark...where will you go?"
I was half way done slicing out Luna's half of the Equestrian crest. "What?"
Feros paced around me as I slashed and ripped the Equestrian crest in half. The sun remained half stiched into the tattered mess, but the moon was torn roughly from the center. "Where will you go when freed?"
I finished up with the sword and set it down. "I don't know. I won't stay here I can tell you that much." I looked down at my pale hands. "I can't go back north.... I don't even know if they kept up with what was happening. Cold's family never liked her dating a human anyways." I rubbed my eyes. "I guess that's for the best. But I really don't know. Maybe I'll travel."
"To?" Feros asked, slowly walking along the edge of the flag. "I have never seen much of Equestria myself. The mountains only, but nothing more."
I stared at the blue headed mare. "...Are--"
"I suggest we go to the east. Someplace warm." She smiled, a warm, praising smile. "Should hurry, cold will come and take the warm away if you're not quick."
I frowned hard, slowly turning to the flag. "I was thinking of going home. Back to Earth, permanently."
"Oh!" Feros yanked her head away. "I see.... Foolish I suppose."
I rubbed my hands together, eventually giving my face a quick wipe. "It'd take a lot to keep me here. After Cold, and this. I just don't know." I wiped across my mouth hard, dragging my lips slightly. "Sorry."
Feros took a deep breath. "Is fine. Spent time with you, would like more. More not locked away. More friend, less ally." She looked towards the door, her scruffy blue mane hanging gently behind her. "Few friends, as I said. Transylmania is not a place for friends."
"We're not in Transylmania." I stated calmly. "...I might be here, locked up in some luxury dungeon, but we're still in Canterlot." I reached out, rubbing her back up to her neck. "Feros, I think I'd like to be friends, even after this. I mean, especially after this. You've been one of the few people actively helping me through this." I scooted over to her. "I just don't know if I could--"
"Could I keep you here?" She asked, refusing to turn around. "I will not beg--"
I didn't answer in voice. I plucked the mare up, pulling her flailing body back against me. I pulled her tight against my chest, leaving her back legs flailing as she tucked her forelegs up against my arms. She yelped softly as she fumbled back, trying to get her hooves under her. I kept her back straight, forcing her back legs out from under her. I buried my face in the back of her mane. "We'll find out I guess." I carefully stood up, still hugging the pony back against me. I swung her around the dull room, feeling that familiar warmth settle into my stomach once again.
I took her over to the bed, letting go of her and watching as she spun around and nearly fell off the opposite side. "Clark, why?!"
I took a deep breath. "Because you know what, I feel alright. I've got a plan, I've got help. And...maybe not the best with direct advice, she's still giving me an idea." I turned back to the flag. "Now, help me hang this up. I think it gets my point across alright."
Feros shook her head, that peculiarly equine shake side to side that also shook her neck. "Yes...I think...perhaps a little blunt." She flew over, taking the left side and flying it back onto the hooks. "No...very blunt." She finished pushing the flag back onto our wall and swooped down towards the cut out section of cloth. "A shame."
"A statement," I clarified. "Now, when she gets here, you gotta go. You gotta run! Because I'm not going next time. If this is how I have to die, or how I have to kill, then this is it. But I'm not going again."
Feros nodded, a bit of fire in her eyes. "Yes. I- ...I still believe violence is a bad answer. But you will do as you will."
I looked towards the flag, feeling a bit of stubborn pride landing in my chest. "I have to. I'm not sick anymore. I can focus, and maybe my memory isn't so great right now, but I know what's going to happen if I let this keep going any longer."
Feros nodded. "Just please, do not hurt yourself, or others. Is my job, as they say."
I turned to the grey mare. "...You're violent? I'm having trouble imagining a mare with such a beautiful voice being violent."
"There is much you don't know of- wait...beau--" She stopped dead, eyes growing wide as her wings flung out and slapped my knee. "...I'm not beautiful." She shook her head hard, quickly standing up and turning away from me. "I fight. I wear armor. I spit and swear and am mean!"
"Doesn't change the fact you've got a beautiful voice--"
"Shut up!" She shouted, her soft rasp carrying her accent hard. "Not beautiful!"
"I--" I could feel a soft thud on the ground. "It's time."
Feros snapped her head towards the door. "Is her?"
I held still, sure of the vibrations through the hard wood floor. "It's her."
Feros swung herself to the door. "Then I should go--"
"One last thing." I grabbed her by the mane, quickly ducking down to one knee and pulling her around. "Incase this is where I die." I pulled the mare up, tucking her into a heavy hug. "Alright...and in the likely event that I will die." I pulled her back again, planting a strong kiss on her lips. Feros let out a sharp yelp.
She pushed herself back, clocking me lightly over the jaw with her free hoof. "Oh, you think death is a fair reason to- to- to do that?!"
"I do." I stood up, dusting myself off and leaving Feros standing alone. "Now...if you don't mind saving my life...I'd appreciate it if you could find Celestia before I embed a piece of ceramic in someone's soft tissue."
Feros stared at me, her cheeks puffed out wide. "Make it another's flesh!" she shouted, flinging herself out of the room. "I will not tolerate your own!"
I could feel my heart beat like mad as the door hung open. "Sure...." I reached into my back pocket, the clothe wrapped Ceramic tucked under my belt. "I'll do my best." I felt my skin grow cold as the navy blue mare peeked around the corner. A smile, a sickening, stomach tossing smile.
"Clark! We are happy you're awake!"
I felt my hand tighten up around the outline of the shank. "Yeah...so am I."