I had been learning lots of new spells and becoming more awesome at the ones I already knew. 'More awesome' insinuates that I was awesome in the first place. I was awesome before! I defeated a sexy evil god thing entirely by myself while tired from all the magic from earlier that day! Unfortunately, no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't summon the circle thing from before. Something else that was interesting was that my cutie mark looked just like the circle.

Spell wise, I was doing fantastic. As well as amazing combinations of other kinds of spells, I'd also created some of my own, and named them. For instance, I'd made the thing I'd done to save me from falling off of the cliff more powerful and named it the Force Barrier spell. I found what I'd done with pouring magic into certain body parts interesting, and look further into it. So far I could make my forelegs charged up and release the magic by stamping, creating a small shock wave. I called it a Majistamp. I'd also learned other spells but these were the only ones I'd made mys-

"Cloud!" Shouted Twilight from downstairs. "Are you up there?!"

"Shut up, Twilight! I'm monologuing!" I shouted back.

"I need to go to Rarity's! Can you go to the shop and pick up some bread while I'm out?!"

"Why don't you send Spike?!"

"When I told him where I was going, he said he'd meet me there and ran ahead of me!"

"Ugh... Fine! But I'm getting white bread!"

"But brown bread is healthier!"

"We're magical unicorn wizards! We can be healthy from spells and stuff!"

"White bread tastes icky!"

"Brown tastes worse!"

"What will I have my applesauce on?!"

"I don't know! Put it on haycon for all I care!"

"How would that even work?!"

"Just- Agh! I'm getting white bread! That's the end of it!"

"But I'm the one who asked you in the first place!"

"Exactly! It serves you right for not going yourself!"

"How's that fair?!"

"I'm spending my hard earned bits! I get to decide!"

"Fine! I don't care anymore! Get your stupid white bread!" I heard the front door slam shut. Finally! I can monologue in peace! Suddenly, the front door opened again. "Cloud!"

"Oh for Realta's sake, Twilight! I'm not getting brown bread!"

"No, not that! There's a stampede!"

The town was shaking more vigorously than Applejack's hoofshake. Everypony was screaming and running indoors. Pinkie vibrated past me, saying something I didn't pick up. I aligned myself to be on the path of the stampede and readied my stance and-

"Look there!" Shouted Rainbitch, pointing towards the stampede. Can't I monologue and narrate in peace?! I looked towards the stampede to see Applejack herding the cows away from the town. Rarity, Fluttershy, Pinkie, Rainbitch and Twilight grouped up to watch Applejack.

"This is the best rodeo show I've ever seen!" Exclaimed Pinkie, shoving her face into a box of popcorn. I rolled my eyes. Why did Twilight even call me out here?

"Well," I said as I walked away from the group, "I've got some white bread to buy. See you girls later."

A week had passed and Pinkie was throwing a party to celebrate Applejack or something. I hadn't been paying much attention. I'd arrived early to see if she needed any help setting up, which she did. She needed my help hanging some things up with levitation. After finishing what I was doing, I walked over to Twilight and Rarity.

"Is Applejack all set?" Twilight asked. Spike was sitting on her back, but since he was next to Rarity he might as well have been a mindless drone.

"Actually, I haven't seen her all week," answered Rainbitch, flying down to us.

"Not since the stampede!" Pinkie added, walking over to us. That was a weird pony combo...

"But she'll be here for sure," said Rainbitch, "Applejack is never late!" She probably just jinxed it. Nah, Applejack will be here! What the buck?! Holy bucking shit! Intruder in my brain! Why do you have different colours of yourself? It seems kinda silly to me! AGH! N-no! Stay back! I have leprechauns! They'll bite your nose off! But I'm a thought! I don't have a nose, silly! Quick! Think of an excuse to get out!

"Well then!" I shouted out of desperation, "I need to go now!"

"Why?" Asked Pinkie, "We were having a perfectly good thought-conversation!" What?! Run! Run now!

"I need to eat bread!" I yelled, then teleported back to the library. What the buck was that?! I'm gonna have nightmares for weeks!

I was back at the Town Hall for Applejack's award ceremony thing. I don't even know what's going on anymore. I should really pay more attention. Twilight was trying to give a speech and Ponies were interrupting her.

"Anypony else?" She asked. "Anypony? No? Well then, as I was trying to say..." The mayor looked at her to cue her to finish. Twilight threw her cue cards in the air and let out an exasperated groan. "Never mind!" The mayor cleared her throat before speaking.

"And so, with no further ado; it is my privilege to give the prize Pony of Ponyville Award to our beloved guest of honor, a Pony of the utmost trustworthiness, reliability, and integrity. Ponyville's most capable and dependable friend: Applejack!" The stage curtains pulled back to reveal... an empty stage. Is this gonna be a running gag at Town Hall or what? Spike hadn't realized Applejack wasn't on stage yet.

"Cool!" He cheered. "Way to go Applejack, that was awesome! I mean-" His cheeks reddened as he realized she wasn't there. The mayor cleared her throat again and Spike rubbed his arm. "Awkward..."

"Ah'm here! Ah'm here!" Applejack called out, yawning. She slowly made her way to the stage murmuring incoherently. "Thank you kindly for this here... award thingy. It's so bright and shiny and, heh, heh heh, ah sure do look funny, heh." She started making funny faces in its reflection. Pinkie Pie soon joined her.

"O-kay..." Said Twilight. "Well, thank you Applejack for saving us from that scary stampede and always being there for everypony!" Applejack yawned more.

"Yeah. Ah like helping the Pony folks and... and stuff." She started snoring for a few seconds before regaining her senses. "Oh, uh, yeah. Uh, Thanks!" She grabbed the handle of the trophy and dragged it along, walking backwards. There was an awkward silence for a few seconds as Applejack left.

"Well," I said to Spike, "that's my cue to get back to studying." I teleported back to my room at the library.

There was a pleasant, gentle breeze on the balcony of the library. It was the perfect place to read a book. I looked up to see the beautiful skyline. This is a great spot to study, I'm glad Twilight recommended it to me. It reall- Wait, what's that rainbow streak in the distance? It's getting closer... Is that coming straight to here or wh- There was a loud crash and everything was pain.

One unconscious Pegasus later, I was on my way to see Applejack. Twilight had insisted on coming with me but I had told her that she didn't need to worry. Even though Applejack's mistake with Rainbitch had broken my collarbone and a couple of legs, even though the crash caused hundreds of bits worth of property damage to the library and even though I had to sit in the waiting room of the hospital in agonizing pain for an hour before the doctors could fix me up because most of the town was being violently sick (courtesy of Applejack's cupcakes), I wasn't mad. I would handle the situation responsibly. Eventually she caved in and let me go, believing my blatant lies.

Every tree I passed in the orchard had baskets pre-placed underneath. I followed the trail of filled baskets until I saw the orange cretin herself. She tried to buck a tree, missed, and fell asleep standing up. I walked over to her and punched her in the face, producing a satisfying cracking sound. She fell onto her back and woke up.

"Ow!" She exclaimed, rubbing where I had punched, "Cloud? What in tarnation was that for?!"

"Applejack," I started bluntly as she stood up. "Why are you terrorizing Ponyville?"

"What are you talkin' about? Ah ain't terrorized nopony! Why'd you hit me?!" She glared at me. Resist the urge to correct her double negative... I pulled out a checklist and began reading from it.

"Two hundred and fifty bits worth of property damage from firing Ponies from catapults and ruining everypony's gardens with rabbit stampedes, five hundred bits worth of hospital bills from poisoned Ponies from those bio-weapons you claimed to be cupcakes, two shed loads of vomit from said Ponies, three broken legs, one shattered collarbone, six cracked ribs and a sprained wing." I looked up from the checklist to see the look of horror on Applejack's face. "I'll ask again; why are you terrorizing Ponyville?"

"But... Ah was tryin' to help everypony..."

"Well you weren't."

"Ah know... It's just ah was so tired from harvesting ah'll these apples."

"Why are you doing it alone anyway?"

"Because-"

"Actually, I don't really care. I've done what I wanted here. See you later." I teleported back to the library. That conversation would have ended in me helping her, which I don't want to do. Maybe I should have helped her anyway. I'm already feeling guilty... No! She broke my collarbone an-

"Cloud!" Called Twilight. "Are you up there?! Did you come back already?!"

"Yes, I'm back!" I shouted to her.

"How did it go with Applejack?!"

"I punched her in the face then left before she could ask for my help!"

"What?! You said you weren't mad!"

"I lied!" Twilight groaned loudly.

"I'm going to see if Applejack's okay, I'll deal with you later!" The front door slammed, signaling her leave. There was a knock at my bedroom door.

"Yes?" I asked.

"It's me," Spike replied, "can I come in?"

"Yeah, sure." He came in.

"Hey. So what happened? Did you really punch her?"

"Yeah."

"Oh. Okay then." There was an awkward silence for a few seconds. "I'm surprised you didn't punch Rainbow Dash for crashing into you."

"Oh, don't you worry, Spike. I did better than just punch her." I grinned evilly. "In fact, I think she's still unconscious!" Spike shuddered.

"Remind me to never get on your bad side..."

Author's Notes:

The last chapter was extra serious for plot related reasons, so this one's more silly for non-plot related reasons.
Next chapter is Gilda. It's gonna be fun!

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Revised 06/01/2015 (DD/MM/YYYY, I'm English).