Author's Notes:

This is a collection of min-shorts all 500-1000 words in length, each detailing a tragic death in Equestria. Updates will come five a day with three original chapters, and two guest chapters. Should anyone wish to submit a guest chapter, PM the author or comment a link to a google doc. And yes. It will have 1000 chapters.

“Ugh… Cursed razor… Always so blunt! Haven’t I told the servants a million times that these old surplus razors are bad for the skin?” The old disgruntled unicorn looking straight into the mirror eyed his magnificent beard. Starswirl’s beard was the pride and envy of all great magicians. And that was exactly why the princess was requiring him to shave it at this very moment.

Starswirl gave an aggravated grunt and he banged the old razor against the sink, eyeing his shaving cream covered face once more. It would take hours to clean away all of the extra hair from his face. Even then, it would require careful precision to make sure that he didn’t snip any extra off of his coat, or Celestia forbid, make the shave uneven. He sighed and grasped the razor firmly in his magic again, setting to work once more. He’d have to make do with what he had.

“Well, at least it’s just hair… Next thing you know they’ll be asking me to get rid of my robe and wizard’s hat just because it doesn’t fit with the dress code…” He dipped his razor in the water filled sink, removing any excess hair and cream before he roughly began to shave his neck again. “Just gotta be careful… No sudden mov— YEOUCH!”

Starswirl cried out in pain as a sharp knock on the door caused him to cut himself with the razor, tearing off a small chunk of coat, beard, and skin haphazardly. He grimaced as he saw a small drop of blood trickling it’s way down his neck.

“Heavens, that was lucky… Who is it? What is it do you want? Can you not hear me using the restroom in here?” Starswirl grumbled at the mirror. Most powerful unicorn ever to exist and he still couldn’t get any alone time in the bathroom for himself. A few moments of non-response told him that the knocker had realized the bathroom was occupied and had left, resulting in more grumbling.

“Alright, Starswirl… Just gotta be careful…” Starswirl close his eyes before looking up at the mirror and placing the razor once again at his neck. He began to gently stroke and shave himself before something odd caught his eye, climbing out of the ornate bathtub behind him and to his left.

“Sweet Celestia, what is that thing?” Starswirl watched in horror as a clone of himself rose from the bathtub, gurgling and bubbling blood out of it’s mouth as it came towards him. He held the razor out in front of himself, swinging it to try and would off his would be attacker. Still though, he couldn’t help but notice that the hell beast seemed to be desperately trying to communicate with him. He could almost read the words off of his lips…

...Don’t… Back up… Behind you…

Starswirl dropped razor in a panic as he made a move to step backward. Unfortunately for him, it wasn’t his lucky day. Though his wits were sharp, the bathroom rug was just one step ahead. Or behind in this case. Starswirl’s hoof caught on the rug, and his clone could only watch in horror before it gurgled its last breaths and crumpled to the ground.

Starswirl felt his hooves go out from under him, as his head made sharp contact with the porcelain sink. Groggy and confused, Starswirl got up and tried to walk, stumbling over to the tub, blood beginning to trickle from his mouth. His horn lit up as he realized that he had once last chance to save himself. He’d have to go back. Just a few moments to before this all started.

In a flash, he was gone with just one phrase floating through his head: Don’t back up. Danger behind you.