Author's Notes:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=grDHsfoZfpY

Everything was wrong. My arm-leg? Hoof? Wing? Talon? No...arms...I have arms...were heavy. I couldn't move them. I didn't want to. My legs-did I have legs? What am I? A...pony?

No...no. Not a pony. Ponies are bad. Evil, ugly creatures. I am NOT a pony. A...griffon? No. I don't have wings. I'm a...a...

It doesn't matter. Nothing is as it should be. Things are wrong. Colors that aren't colors swirled and warped in front of me, around me, behind me. They weren't real. They were wrong. WRONG. It was all wrong...

Sounds. Bad sounds. Speech? Disjointed. Indecipherable. Angry screaming. Scratching. I could feel the sounds in my skin, scratching and scraping and gnashing and pulling and tearing and...

It was all wrong. Everything was wrong.

The scratching is...was...is in my skull. My head full of spiders. Scratching, scuttling, biting, eating...Oh God, eating! They were eating me! I wanted to thrash and scratch and pull them off, get them away, get them out of my eyes and ears and nose, they were in my mouth, someone get them out! They burned and stung in my lungs, scuttling over themselves and devouring me from the inside. Everything burned. Everything hurt. I...

I'm so tired...
-----

"He's going into cardiac arrest!" One of the doctors shouted, the entire room a flurry of movement. Two large, heavily insulated pads were pressed to Jason's chest, an electric, rapidly ascending whine filled the room, and—

"CLEAR!"
-----

Everything hurt. Something stabbed my chest, again, and again. The pain burned. I screamed, but the scratching, eating little spiders muffled any noise. I couldn't breathe. I hurt all over, burning, prickling, aching...just make it stop! Please!

Someone! Just make it stop!

Something was falling away. Something ever-present, nameless, and very much necessary. I couldn't hold it. Everything was slipping through my fingers, slippery, elusive, evading every attempt. I couldn't let it go.

I...I am...Ape? No...No, no no no no...Monster?

'You're nothing but a monster!'

'Sweet Celestia, what is that thing?!'

...Celestia?

'Get out this instant! I'll not have a beast in my boutique!

'I've seen enough of—'

The scratching drowned out any other sounds or thoughts, threatening to split my head in two.

Monster.

I am a monster.

'I'll help you every step of the way, Jeff.'

...Jeff...who is Jeff?
-----

Rainbow Dash was awoken by the door creaking open, a gurney wheeling in. She silently listened as several grunts of exertion preceded a heavy thump into her neighboring bed, the curtain obscuring her view of her new roommate.

"How can something so skinny be so bucking heavy?" One of the stallions complained, before the small group left without a word or look back.

Some 'thing'? Rainbow thought in confusion.
-----

Fluttershy sobbed into her hooves in the hospital's waiting room, Spike rubbing her back. "I...I-I-I killed somepony!" She wailed, fur matted with tears.

"Oh come on, no you didn't!" Spike rebuked, patting the distraught mare's withers. "You just poisoned him; we don't know he's dying!"

Fluttershy sobbed harder, an older mare glaring at Spike from across the room. The little dragon winced, gulping. "That came out wrong...I meant to say you couldn't have known it would hurt him."

"B-but I should've!" Fluttershy sniffled, still hidden by her forehooves. "I take care of animals for a living... I know how much is safe to give my critters, every single one of them. I don't make mistakes like this..." She curled in on herself, wailing, "I'm a monster!"

Spike could deal with Twilight's freakouts. He could even deal with Sombra.

I can't do this, he realized, gulping. But...I know who can. Standing, he hopped down from the chair and ran to the door. "I'll be right back!" And out he went, not waiting for a reply. A single word ran through his mind, courtesy of Jason's own colorful, and often quite loud vocabulary. Dammit...dammit dammit dammit!

Dodging the ponies in the street, Spike finally crashed through the library's door. "Twilight!"

No answer. The library was completely trashed, books lying everywhere, pages torn out, inkwells spilled and shattered against walls. And the entire building was silent as a grave.

Walking into the eerily quiet building, he immediately went up the stairs. "Twilight? You here?" Again, no response. Spike stood outside Twilight's bedroom, reaching for the doorknob.

He hesitated. Is...is she angry? He pulled back, wringing his hands nervously. Is it worth risking it?

'I'm a monster!'

...Of course it was.

The little dragon took a deep breath and pushed open the door, willing himself to enter. "Twilight?"

No reply. But he saw her. Twilight laid on the bed, eyes puffy, red, and half-open. She looked bedraggled, her entire body spotted with fine black splatters. Papercuts ringed her mouth and muzzle, as if she had tried eating the stuff. Spike gasped, almost falling back. "Twilight...what happened to you?!"

He ran to the bedside, Twilight's eyes absently following his movements. "Twilight?"

"I'm sorry..." She whispered, her voice hoarse and almost gone. "I looked everywhere for you. I—"

"Forget about me. Fluttershy needs you, Twilight...she's in really bad shape!" Spike grabbed her hoof, pulling with all his might.

"What can I do?" Twilight muttered, pulling her hoof back. "They hate me. I saw it. I'd just make it worse."

"That's crazy-talk!" Spike shouted, throwing his hands up. "What's wrong with all you ponies?! Pinkie hasn't come out of her room in days, Rainbow Dash is in the hospital, Applejack sends Big Macintosh into town instead of coming herself, and Fluttershy thinks she's a monster for one tiny dosage mistake!" He crossed his arms, huffing in frustration. A tiny wisp of smoke wafted up from his nostrils at the gesture. "The only pony not going crazy-dramatic on us Rarity. Rarity! Has Discord messed the world up again or something?!"

Twilight winced at the shout, and sat up to address the young drake. "Don't be ridiculous, Fluttershy's keeping him in check. Things are just...weird right now."

"Either way, Fluttershy needs you. Now. I'll tell you on the way."

Twilight slid out of the bed, looking herself over in disgust. "I think I should get a bath first...I look like a Rorshcach test. My wings need fixing too." She waved the limbs, covered in skewed, bent, and broken feathers. "I couldn't fly if I wanted to."

"We don't have time!" Spike groaned, grabbing Twilight's foreleg and pulling her down the stairs.

"Hey! Watch it!" Twilight protested, wings flapping uselessly behind her. Spike let go as soon as they reached the bottom, running to the door. She followed after getting her bearings, frowning at the idea of being seen in such a state. Darn it...I'm a princess now, I can't let Ponyville see me as an incompetent slob! What if it gets back to Celestia?!

"Twilight, come on!"

"I'm coming, I'm coming..." She followed. "...Spike?"

He turned, eyes rolling. "Yeah, I'll fix up the library when we get—"

"That's not what I was gonna say." Twilight said flatly, before pulling Spike to her chest with a foreleg. "I'm glad you're back, Spike...and I am sorry."