“Oh those moronic little dick hickies!” Bucky squeezed his eyes shut and tried to shake out the frustration trapped inside of his head. He banged on the floor with his hoof.

“Bucky… I don’t know where to begin, but please don’t talk about our foals that way,” Derpy said in a soft voice, her eyes wide and hurt looking. “They’re teenagers. They’re going to do stupid things. They just did a bunch of stupid things and now there is one more stupid thing.”

“I’m calling my auntie.” Bucky opened his eyes and with a mental command, he called a rotocopter golem to come to him. While he waited for it to arrive, he looked at Derpy. “I’m sorry… but this has been a very trying day. I need sleep. I was awake most of yesterday, all of last night, and all of today. I am worn out from dealing with this and I am scared out of my mind for Ripple”

“Come to bed with me… come here… let me hold you and make you feel better.” Derpy’s voice was inviting but not seductive. She patted the bed beside her. “Sometimes love needs a stupid gesture to make everything okay. Would you do something stupid for me?”

Slumping, Bucky hung his head. “Probably.” He closed his eyes. “Most likely.” He heaved a sigh. “Without a doubt.”

Looking up over the front door, Berry Punch read the words that had been burned into the wood. “Don’t do anything stupid.” Bucky had done it, he had burned the words above the door into the wood just as he said he would. A broken hearted smile appeared on Berry Punch’s face as she looked up.

“Mama!”

Turning around, Berry Punch saw Cadance standing at her hind leg, smacking her lips. As she looked at Cadance, the earth pony had a stupid idea. The earth pony had a moronic, stupid idea and she grinned at Cadance.

“Bucky! I have an idea to help our troubled foals!” Berry Punch looked at Cadance and her eyes narrowed.

“Mama?” Cadance, who had been hopeful for food of some sort, now looked uncertain.

“Bucky, if we hurry, we can still catch them! Loch Skimmer is a slow flyer!”

Standing in a small but cozy room, an exhausted looking Bucky looked at Spanner and Lugnut. Bucky’s eyes were red and blurry. His expression was dull, almost vacant. It had been a long, trying day and he had approached the ends of his endurance.

“It is mostly ready, we’ve had a few tests, it’s stable enough, the problem is the power supply and the engine… we need more power. We need lots of electricity with the current prototype.” Lugnut gave Bucky an apologetic look and then dropped his gaze to the floor.

Closing his eyes, Bucky thought of Lyra, who was in Ponyville. Too far away for his purposes. Time mattered. The drugs on Ripple would be wearing off right about the same time that Loch would be arriving in Canterlot, if all of the guesswork involved here proved correct. Or maybe even before, which would be awful.

“Sir, the prototype was designed to hold three. I think we could make it work through. We just need more spark,” Spanner said.

Opening his eyes, Bucky reached out his talons and patted Sprocket on the head. “You’re cute.” The little griffoness cub was adorable, small, fluffy, and feathered. It gave Bucky dreams for how Bandua would be.

Sprocket, who peeped at Bucky’s touch, looked up and replied, “Me know.”

And then, Bucky had an idea. Bucky too, had a moronic, stupid idea.

Flapping a few times to help gain altitude, Loch Skimmer completed another circle over Ponyville, trying to catch whatever updrafts were available. She was a slow and steady flier, tireless, she had proven that in Baltimare after the hurricane. The weight of Ripple and Sparkler weren’t even noticeable.

“How is Ripple?” Loch Skimmer asked.

“She’s mumbling about killing your father for breaking your leg,” Sparkler replied.

“Oh bugger… Sparky, she sounds like she is waking up in a fighting mood.” Loch Skimmer gave her wings a few more flaps and then surged upwards on an updraft. “Don’t turn to stone Sparky… I’m strong, but I don’t know if I am that strong.”

“My reflexes for that are pretty strong… but I’ll try to keep it from happening so we don’t all die.” Sparkler looked up at Loch Skimmer above her and shivered as the cold wind tore at her pelt. It was cold up here at this altitude and Sparkler wished that Loch Skimmer could fly a little faster.

“Derpy, do you think this will work out?” Thistle asked, looking at the grey pegasus on the bed beside her. “I mean, it is getting late. The sun will be setting soon. I’m worried about all of this. I’m worried for our foals and I’m worried about Bucky…”

Picking up where Thistle left off, Derpy heaved a sigh and said, “Bucky is sleep deprived. you know how he gets when he’s been awake too long. So Bucky’s exhausted and he hasn’t had much of a chance to eat very much and his magic is all screwy. So I am thinking Princess Celestia is going to have to be the one to fix all of this. I hope that the golem Bucky sent gets to her soon.”

“You know, I think everything would have been fine by just sending a message to Princess Celestia. I’m not sure why Bucky felt the need to go himself.” Thistle rolled over onto her back and pulled Bell Heather over her barrel. She began to pat Bell on the back to make her burp.

“Bucky and Berry had to go look after their foals and make sure they were okay.” Belisama lifted up Bandua in her talons, held her cub close to her beak, and peeped at her. Bandua peeped back and Belisama’s crest rose.

“She peeped back!” Derpy’s eyes went wide. “Did she… just talk?”

“I dunno…” Belisama peeped again, a shrill peep, and Bandua repeated the sound, also a shrill peep. Belisama peeped twice, one long, and one short, and Bandua made two peeps, both short. Belisama peeped again, this time two short peeps, and then cocked her head as Bandua made two short peeps.

“I think she’s communicating!” Thistle grinned.

Fluffing out with pride, Belisama eyes began to glaze over with tears. “I just wish her eyes would open. But she’s trying to talk with us. Her mind is developing.”

“I wish Bucky was here,” Derpy said, her eyes also watering as she looked at the tiny griffon cub. The grey mare felt a pride that burned deep within her breast as she looked at Bandua. Never in all of Derpy’s life was she so happy to hear a peep.

Canterlot was visible ahead. Loch Skimmer still had to gain some altitude, but she felt they were making good time. Gaining the required altitude was the tricky part about flying to Canterlot. Loch Skimmer had never done anything quite like this before, but she felt that she was doing a good job.

“She’s starting to squirm!”

Loch Skimmer gritted her teeth at Sparkler’s warning. Canterlot was still too far away. “Sparkler, try hugging her and whispering soothing things in her ear about how much we love one another!”

Loch Skimmer tried to coax a little more speed out of her wings. She was flying into a headwind and that made things difficult. She pondered angling away from Canterlot and then circling in, so she wasn’t flying head first into the wind.

“Do you hear that?” Sparkler shouted over the wind.

Her ears perking, Loch Skimmer listened. She heard a faint droning buzz, almost like a nest of bees. It was getting louder. Feeling alarmed, Loch Skimmer’s adrenaline kicked in and her speed increased a fair bit from raw panic.

As the droning buzz got louder, Sparkler saw what it was. Something silver-grey was coming up fast behind them. It bounced in the air a lot, getting tossed around in the air currents and wind. Whatever it was, it was fast. It was gaining on them with incredible speed.

It slowed as it approached and Sparkler got a clear view as it pulled up alongside them. A sleek shiny looking gyrocopter. It was wide in the front, tear shaped, and it narrowed towards the rear. It was pushed through the air by a propeller on the tail and held aloft by a rotor blade mounted near the middle. In the front, where it was wider, there were two side by side seats and Sparkler could see two griffons and a unicorn stuffed into the front seats. All three of them were wearing goggles and scarves around their necks.

As it grew closer, Sparkler could make out Trixie in the front seat and something was over her horn. The unicorn was waving as the craft approached. The gyrocopter, faster than Loch Skimmer, flew past, and Sparkler could make out two figures stuffed into the rear seat together, crammed in. Much to Sparkler’s fear and horror, she could make out Berry Punch and Bucky. Both were wearing goggles and scarves as well.

Ahead, the gyrocopter banked and began to swoop around for another pass. Sparkler realised she was in some real trouble if Bucky had gone through this much trouble to catch them.

“We are so horned!” Loch Skimmer cried.

At some point, this ridiculous and foolish idea had turned sour. Berry Punch realised that now. She was crammed into a seat with Bucky that was only meant to hold one occupant, and it was a tight fit for a unicorn and an earth pony pregnant with twins holding one alicorn foal. There was also the throbbing erection stabbing into her backside that didn’t help anything at all. Wiggling around and trying to get comfortable only made things worse. Biting her lip, Berry wondered how bad of an idea it would be if she wiggled around enough to get it inside of her and then allowed the vibration of the gyrocopter to finish the job.

It would be an awkward moment doing that while holding Cadance, but Berry was tempted to try.

“Trixie makes a Great and Powerful battery! Trixie is electric! Trixie is pissing herself because she is a unicorn and she has discovered a fear of heights! Trixie will need a great deal of therapy before this is over! Trixie can do nothing so now she will laugh! Mwahahahahahahah!”

Lugnut, raising his voice to be heard over the wind, turned his head backwards to look at Bucky and said, “We can’t go any slower or we’ll drop! The top rotor isn’t powered, it acts like a wing, as we’re pushed through the air, it spins and provides lift!”

“Just keep circling around!” Bucky replied.

“Aye aye, sir!”

Just when things couldn’t possibly get any more awkward or worse, a flock appeared in the sky ahead of them. Craning his head around and squirming, Bucky could just make out the figures if he squinted. As he wiggled in his seat, something rock hard and very, very awake prodded Berry Punch in the backside.

“Here comes the cavalry,” Bucky said, wondering if this even would get him remembered as a good father or a terrible father. “Here comes auntie.”

“So… Loch Skimmer and Sparkler foalnapped Ripple, who foalnapped Loch Skimmer earlier, Ripple is in the middle of a nervous breakdown, we’re flying in an experimental million bit aircraft that isn’t supposed to be seen just yet, Trixie is losing her marbles from fear, we have two gay griffons having a wonderful date with one another in the front seat, and I am sitting on my husband’s boner while holding my daughter, who happens to be the immortal embodiment of love, and we’re trying to catch our three teenaged foals before this escalates into something that gets out of control,” Berry Punch said, summing up the situation.

“When you put it like that it sounds as though we failed,” Bucky replied. “Just so long as it doesn’t get any worse, I think we’ll be okay! Now stop squirming before I make a mess!”

“Auntie Celery!” Cadance cried when she saw Princess Celestia and wing of royal guards. She clapped her hooves together and her eyes were filled with happiness behind her goggles.

“Loch Skimmer, Sparkler, both of you are in so much trouble!” Berry Punch barked as the gyrocopter flew past the trio. Berry Punch raised one front hoof and shook it at them to let them know she meant business.

Unable to stop himself, Bucky threw back his head and let out a cackle.

Author's Notes:

I dunno what music should be playing... Ride of the Valkyries, Flight of the Bumblebee, or maybe screechy violins.

WAIT! I know! THIS!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Fn36l_z3WY