"Oh, dear God, yes! You two are soooooo good!"

"Excuse me, Mr. Gilgamesh, but could you please not say those things? It sounds like… something else is happening in here."

"I can't help it. You two are just amazing at-"

*CRACK*

"YEOWCH!"

"I'm sorry!"

"No no, that was good scream. You girls just keep doing your thing. Oooooooh, yeah…"

The Princesses, the Mane Six, Spike, and several other ponies were outside the local spa, listening and guessing at what was happening inside.

"A spa treatment. He asks for a reward for saving Ponyville and chooses an all expenses paid spa treatment," Rainbow Dash said, still barely able to comprehend the situation.

"Well, he did hurt his back, so it only makes sense that he'd like a trained masseuse to fix it," Rarity explained.

"Well, I guess. I just hope he doesn't-"

"Hey, since I'm here, why don't we go for the whole thing? Mud bath, steam, oh and you have worked on nails, right? It's been ages since I've had a manicure or a pedicure."

"… I will never be able to look at him the same way again," Rainbow quipped.

"Me neither," Applejack agreed.

"Well, this sounds like it will take a while," Celestia said. "I could use some tea, and something to get me through the rest of this day. Can I trust you girls to let me know when he's done?"

"Absolutely, Princess Celestia!" Twilight answered with pride.

"Good. I'm going to head over to Sugarcube Corner."

"Oh no, not without me you aren't," Luna began. "I still need to make sure you lay off the cake," she explained as she trotted over with you.

"As if you're one to talk, Princess 'I ate an entire buffet worth of chocolate chip cookies'."

"That was one time, and I was nervous!"

The girls watched the two playfully bicker before turning back to the spa.

"So, um, now what?" Fluttershy asked.

"I suppose we wait, though to be honest, hearing him enjoying himself so much is making me jealous," Rarity huffed.

"Yeah, and I really don't like just waiting around for him to get done," Rainbow growled in agreement.

"Hm… I think I've got an idea."

The group turned to Twilight.

"He's just been too random this whole time. He seems like an idiot, but is he? Did he pretend to be stupid at the Crystal Empire to distract us so he could get one of his swords, or was it just a coincidence? I don't know, and I hate not knowing."

"So, what've you got in mind, Twilight?" Spike asked.

She smirked. "I'm going to read his mind."

"Uh, Twi, Ah know this is for a good reason an all, but is this legal?" Applejack asked as the unicorn stood upon her back.

"Don't worry, I'm not going to be doing any mind control or anything like that. And I'm only going to read his surface thoughts, not try and pry into anything deep. I don't know how to do that anyway," Twilight responded confidently, finally able to look through the window. What she saw shocked her.

It was the first time she had ever seen Gilgamesh without his armor on, and she was surprised at how well built he was. His muscle definition would dwarf most minotaurs, and though she always knew he was large it put it in perspective that he had to curl up to fit inside the heated bath that could fit about ten ponies, his knees sticking up above the surface as well as his shoulder upwards. His skin was grey with no coat aside from some golden blonde hair on his chest as well as a chin-strap beard around his face, and a rather impressive jawline. She couldn't see his mane, seeing at it was wrapped in a towel, but she could only guess it was the same color. Somehow, even though ponies and most of the creatures in all of Equis didn't wear clothes, she felt a bit lewd for looking at him like this.

She shook the thoughts from her head before focusing on entering his mind.

"Twi, are you getting' any-?"

"AAAAAAAAH!"

Twilight fell off Applejack's back, covering her eyes with her forehooves.

"WHAT WAS THAT!? WHAT WAS THAT!? WHAT IN THE NAME OF EQUESTRIA WAS THAT!?"

"Twi! What's wrong!" Applejack called as she and the rest of her friends gathered around.

"He found me reading his mind and he projected things into my head!" she shouted. "And they were… OH CELESTIA, THEY MADE NO SENSE AT ALL!"

"Oh, yeah. This is the life. If only I had some tea to go along with this. Maybe I should get some more for Celly and Lulu, that would make them like me better."

"Is that really all he's thinking about?"

"Huh? Who's there?"

"What? He can hear me?"

"Hey, is that you Twilight? What are you doing in my head?"

"Trying to find out more about you."

"Is this legal?"

"As if you should talk! Now tell me what you're planning!"

"No, now get out. I'm trying to relax."

"I'm not leaving until I get something useful out of you!"

"You better, or else I'll make you want to leave."

"Oh yeah, and just how do you expect to do that?"

"I'm glad you asked!"

"Wait, wha-?"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Uo5Rhn8zuPA

"WHAT IN THE WORLD WAS THAT!?"

"One of the tamer things I could show you. Get out unless you want to experience more."

"You won't make me leave by just shoving weird things into my-!"

"Next one."

"Wait a min-!"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4hpEnLtqUDg

"WHAT!? WHAT!? WHAT!? WHAT!? WHAT!? WHAT!? WHAT!? WHA-!?"

"Ready to give up yet?"

"N-NO! YOU'RE NOT GOING TO-!"

"Next one."

"HOLD ON, I CHANGE MY-!"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BH2dLyCWE3k

"GAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!"

"And she's gone. I warned her."

"Twilight! Are you alright!?" Celestia asked as she and her sister galloped over to her student and her friends.

"What happened?" Luna asked.

"She tried ta read his mind an-!"

"She what!?" Luna shouted as she interrupted the farm mare before facehoofing. "Oh, I should've warned her."

"Huh?"

"I've also been subjected to the insanity that is Gilgamesh's mind."

"You tried reading his mind too, Princess Luna?" Twilight asked, finally recovering from the visions she saw.

"Actually, I tried to enter through his dreams. Unfortunately, he turned out to be a lucid dreamer."

"A what?" Rainbow Dash asked.

"It's a phenomenon where a being can recognize that they are dreaming and control their dreams, at least to some extent," Twilight answered in her typical lecturer tone.

"So, what happened?" Spike asked.

"Well, the first time…"

"Now then, what dreams doth a creature like thee have?"

"Hi Luna."

"W-What!? What sorcery is-?"

"Hey Lulu. KAIO-KEN!"

"Kaio-wha-?

*WHAM*

"HE PUNCHED YOU!?" Twilight screeched.

"And it only got stranger from there."

"How?" Rarity asked, her face utterly aghast.

Luna's eye stared to twitch as she was surrounded by Gilgameshes in banana outfits, dancing to a strange tune. She soon decided the best option was to simply leave and try again.

"Well perhaps this time it will not be so-"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hYWHJwyO5Gs

"Please. Desist. Make it stop."

"Alright, Luna. Be prepared for-"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j28fLOhepO4

"… I'm leaving."

"And then, there was-" Luna's face turned red. "Um, never mind. I'm sure you understand the general idea."

"Only too much so," Rarity groaned.

Luna blushed further as she remembered the last time she tried to enter through his dreams.

Luna looked around, surprised to find nothing but blackness around her, usually being assaulted with… something by now.

"Hey Luna. Check out the gun show."

The Princess turned and what she saw made few face flush tomato red. In front of her was Gilgamesh, nude aside from a piece of cloth covering his netters, and attached to several odd machines… which he then proceeded to play by flexing his muscles.

"Hey Luna. You're drooling."

"Whuh?"

The Princess touched her face to find spittle had begun to drop from the edges of her mouth. She squealed in embarrassment before leaving the dream plain.

"Ah! Wow I feel great! If it was my money I'd pay double!"

The group rounded the corner to see the warrior, fully dressed. Even under all his armor he appeared to be almost glowing with pleasure.

"So Celestia, you said you had something you wanted to talk with me about?"

The solar diarch cleared her throat before approaching. "Indeed. Gilgamesh, I wish to know your intentions for the future and the reasons behind your most recent actions."

"Hey come on, Celly, you know me, I do what I want! And what I 'want' is to get on the good side of you and your sister!"

"There must be more to it than that."

"Hm. Maybe there is, maybe there isn't. Maybe I'll tell you if you do a little something for me?"

"Gilgamesh, please take this seriously," Luna pleaded.

"If you will not tell us what you want, then I must request you leave Equestria immediately."

"W-What?" Luna asked, shocked at both the request and the sternness of her voice.

"Wow Tia, that's pretty harsh," Gilgamesh replied.

"Hardly. You have attacked me and my subjects just for fun, and even though you have never killed or maimed anypony you have still caused grief. Though I appreciate the few times you have performed acts of heroism and kindness, this most recent event has proven to me that you can cause catastrophe even completely by accident. I think it would be best for Equestria if you left."

"S-Sister."

"Princess Celestia?" Twilight asked, completely stunned by how harsh her gentle mentor was being.

"Hey, lay off. Honestly, you're starting to make me a little angry here. It was an accident. I even came to fix it. Besides, I still need to get my weapons and my power back," Gilgamesh replied, some frustration seeping into his tone.

"Gilgamesh, please, I beg you to leave these lands," Celestia pleaded as a scowl began to appear on her face.

"'Beg'? Did you say 'beg'?" Gilgamesh stepped forward and quickly grabbed the Princess by her neck, pulling her forward. "PRINCESS CELESTIA DOES NOT BEG!"

The entire town went quiet, stunned by his angry outburst.

"Princess Celestia is a kind, wise, and powerful ruler. She is a mighty warrior who's eyes burn with a righteous fury even more intense than the sun she commands. She would do anything for her subjects, and she would never submit to anything that threatened them!"

The Princess began to grit her teeth in response, barely holding back her rage.

"She would never beg, no matter how powerful her opponent was! She is strong and proud! SO WHERE IS SHE, BECAUSE THAT IS NOT THE MARE I SEE IN FRONT OF ME!"

"WELL MAYBE SHE GOT TIRED OF EVERYPONY BEING AFRAID OF HER!" Celestia shouted back as she smacked his hand away. "MAYBE SHE DIDN'T WANT TO BE SEEN AS FEARSOME WARRIOR ANYMORE, DID YOU THINK OF THAT!?"

Everypony was stunned at Celestia's outburst, even Luna. Gilgamesh looked equally surprised.

"After you were finally put away, after the Great War, I tried to be the ruler I wanted to be. I tried to rule my lands not as a soldier but as the Princess who cared for her subjects. But every time they looked at me I didn't see admiration or respect, I saw fear. Fear! Fear of their own ruler, fear of the one who fought and bled for them! Fear for me, who would've died for them without a second thought!" she continued as tears began to stream down her cheeks. "I tried to be gentle but still they were afraid, acting as if I would smite them where they stood if they so much as sneezed in my presence! That's when I knew I had to be not just a kind ruler to them, but to all! After all, if my own subjects feared me, then how would the other nations feel about me? I did everything I could to promote Harmony not just for Equestria but for all nations, for all creatures! I did everything I could to solve problems with wit and diplomacy! And then you had to show up! You made me don the armor and wield the weapons I swore I would never touch again! I can still see in my dreams the terror in the eyes of my student and her friends when they found me enraged!"

She stepped forward, her snout touching his face guard. "But you never considered that, did you!? All you ever thought about was what was fun for you, never thinking for a moment what others thought of you! Never caring what other thought of you! YOU NEVER CONSIDERED THAT, DID YOU!?"

For a full minute, no one said a word. All were stunned into silence.

Sister, Luna thought. Is this truly how you felt over all these centuries? Is this why you took all those actions? Tears threatened to fall down her own cheeks. Oh Celestia, if only I knew, Nightmare Moon may have never come to be.

After a moment, Gilgamesh lowered his head.

"You're right. I never did consider that," he replied simply. He took a step back and bowed. "I've caused you a lot of trouble. Please excuse me."

Without another word he began to walk towards the Everfree Forest. Celestia stood dumbstruck before finally recovering herself.

"And where do you think you're going!?" she shouted angrily. He turned to face her and instantly all her anger drained away she she saw his eyes.

"Somewhere you'll never see me again."

His eyes looked dead, lifeless, like one who had given up on everything. His voice was devoid of any enthusiasm or zest for life. He turned and walked back towards the Everfree, disappearing behind the thick foliage.

It had been hours since then when Luna entered her sister's room. She didn't even turn to look at her as she entered, and her tea remained untouched as she stared off into space.

"Sister. Are you-?"

"I did it, Luna," Celestia interrupted.

"D-Did what?"

"I beat him. I defeated one of the greatest threats to Equestria, maybe even all of Equis. I did it without having to fight him, or even make any bargains with him."

"Y-Yes I suppose-"

"So tell me Luna," she interrupted again, turning to face her sister with a weary expression. "Why do I feel like I've made a terrible mistake?"

Luna couldn't respond. She could't think of anything. The day had already been too strange and confusing, too many emotions and unexpected realizations came to the surface.

"Oh, it's time to set the sun, isn't?" Celestia asked, rising. "Let's go then Luna, we have our responsibilities."

Luna simply nodded and followed her sister. As they approached the balcony she made a fateful decision, one she would have never even considered before today.

Let it never be said I was the most emotionally stable individual in the world.

I sighed as I looked up at the night sky in one of the few clearings in the Everfree.

Luna's night is as gorgeous as always.

I had a lot to think about. A century of fighting and wondering what the real ramifications of my actions were. I thought I wasn't doing too much damage, at least not to people- er, ponies- er… beings. I never injured them to the point they'd never recover, and I never killed any. I considered that my greatest achievement, that I could defeat entire armies without killing anyone. In fact, aside from hunting, I hadn't killed anything before Twintania, and he was looking for me specifically. But it looks like I was doing more damage than I thought. If Celestia broke down in tears in front of me, how many mere mortals had I psychologically and emotionally scarred in the past?

I was at a loss of what to do. On the one hand I had made promises with others across the multiverse, to defend the innocent and destroy evil. But now, I honestly wondered if I was doing more harm than good, and right now I just felt like lying here until I died. But what could I tell them? "Oh sorry, I know you're in a desperate situation, but I'll probably make things worse, so you'd better forget it."

Goddammit, what am I supposed to-?

A voice rang out, cutting off my thoughts

“Oh great and mighty Gilgamesh, I ask for your aid! I, Kat Shifter, the Gravity Queen, required your assistance in defending Canterlot from a great threat! I summon you, oh great and mighty warrior!”

Kat?

It was Kat, my beloved student. She was calling out to me. She needed my help. But what could I do? I'd just make things worse, wouldn't I?

“Gilgamesh! I request your aid once again! I need your help! I can’t save them without you!”

'Can't save them without you?' What was she-?

My mind lurched as I realized what she meant.

The Princesses! They're in danger and she's trying to save them!

I got up to my feet and reached for my naginata, but hesitated.

Could I really help? Am I just going to ruin things, not only for me but for her too?

As I debated this her voice rang out once again.

“Gilgy!”

In that voice was not only desperation, but pain. She was in danger. I pushed all my negative thoughts away and cut open a hole into the Rift before entering. I flew towards her universe as fast as I could.

“GILGY, PLEASE!”

He voice was even more desperate than before.

I'm coming Kat, just hold on!

“GILGAMESH!”

I cut open a path into her world and was shocked to find Canterlot in shambles. But that was quickly pushed to the side as I saw some sort of giant sea creature looking thing hovering in the air.

“SENSEI!!”

My blood ran cold as I realized the voice was coming right in front of the monster. I used the wind to blast myself at the creature, ready to hit it as hard as I could. This thing would not take Kat away from me!

Luna arrived at the large tree sitting in the middle of the expansive field. After touching down she reached for the pressure-sensitive switch near the roots. As she triggered it the tree began to open, revealing a dark curved blade inside a pedestal. It was the spot she had chosen to hide his blade, a fake tree that not only hid the weapon physical but also magically. None other than her knew its location, not even her sister.

Am I really going to do this? she thought before shaking the thought from her head. No. I have to know. She withdrew the blade from the stand before wrapping it in cloth and placing it her saddlebag.

"Oh my, seeing you out here all by your lonesome. Should you really be all alone, little Princess?"

Luna turned to face the voice's owner only to be shocked at what she saw. The figure was slender and appeared to be the same species as Gilgamesh, or at least one very similar, likely a female. Its skin was blue and it was dressed in little clothing, thought what she did have looked elegant. It had a long flowing blue mane that was kept from its face by a circlet with which also served as a headdress that give it the look of having wings or fins on the side of its face. Or maybe that was actually part of its body, it was difficult to tell. Her eyes were yellow and looked rather intimidating. She draped herself over a large green orb, large enough for her to sit on, and appeared to radiate with power.

"And who might you be?" Luna asked, cautious of this being.

"My name is Calofisteri. You came here to get that weapon and give it to Gilgamesh, didn't you?"

"What of it? What concern is it of yours?"

"Oh my, well you see that just won't do. We can't have you making him stronger, it would get in the way."

"'We'? Who else do you speak of?" Luna asked as she drew her swords and readied her halberd, thankful she brought them along.

"It doesn't matter. You won't get to know. You look so tired, little Princess, and this place is so peaceful. Why don't you rest here… FOR ETERNITY!" she finished as her eyes turned vicious and her mouth stretched into a wicked smile.

"The night is my realm. What Mistress of the Night would I be if I slept through it? Besides, I spent enough time resting on the moon," Luna retorted. "HAVE AT THEE!"

Author's Notes:

WOOT! TWO IN ONE WEEK! I'M ON FIRE!

As I said before "The Mighty Warrior of Epicness" is not all giggles and jokes. I just hope Celestia's rage didn't come from nowhere. And hey, another crossover with Gravity of the Situation! Kinda funny that the last big feels moment also involved that story. And we can also see the plot is starting to pick up, too! Hope you guys like it, because I don't know if I'll be able to get the next chapter out for a while as my schedule is going to become a bit more cramped. Don't worry, I'll still try my best.

Later peeps and peepettes!