The Last Ride
Chapter 9: Frank Miller is Gonna Sue
Previous Chapter Next ChapterIt took a bit longer than I had expected it to, but I finally caught up with the Everfree’s pack of resident, redneck rejects. In fact, in my haste, I almost ran right into the middle of their group and lost the element of surprise that I so desperately needed. Fortunately, things worked out for the best and I was able to get a good look at what I was facing and, to be honest, I really didn’t like it. At least they had stopped to figure out what was making all that noise they had heard. Ducking down behind a group of low bushes, glad that I had had the foresight to draw down my Hellfire so that the light wouldn’t give me away as I approached, I began to observe the group and formulate a plan to pull them apart.
Now, let me explain something to you, rescues are not easy, not by a long shot. There are a lot of variables that make each one unique and most of these variables don’t make themselves known until the worst possible moment, thus making it more likely that one or more hostages could get hurt… or worse. One such variable is the number of little fillies that are in dire need of rescue, I was expecting only three but instead I’m looking at a six pack. To make things worse, I recognize two of the extras as Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon, both wholly unknown quantities when it comes to stressful situations and, given the black eye that Diamond Tiara is sporting, I’m willing to bet they’re already on their captor’s bad side. The next problem I see with the kids is the group’s fourth blank flank, I’m pretty sure I know who she is but, apart from a few theories, I have no idea what she’s capable of and honestly I’d prefer to not have her wall eyed mother or possible Time Lord father after my ass, I got enough to worry about as it is.
Then there are the Peaches themselves, because my day isn’t just fucked enough. First, is this older, pinkish Earth pony mare that’s acting as the warden of the group’s future meal. She’s big for a mare, like Mac big, and I almost mistake her for a stallion, but the bulging muscles and split skin tells me it’s not her natural state just as well as the more rounded facial structure typical of female ponies everywhere. To top it off she’s got each of the fillies on a leash held in her teeth, so if she decides to bolt she’ll have no problem dragging the kids along with her. Next up is another Earth pony, this one definitely a stallion given the weather beaten hat and vest he’s sporting, and apart from that he doesn’t seem too different from any other pony in the world. I can even say the same for the little green mare with the silver mane, she’s yet another Earth pony and unlike the other two she seems to be about the same age as Twilight and her friends. What makes me nervous about her isn’t the bandoleer of sharp objects currently strapped to her barrel but the fact that the Sin Sense is giving me a name, Peach Cobbler, something that the undead never do. To round out their “family” is a Griffin with a black pelt and dark grey feathered head. From my hiding place I can see the metal blades embedded into each claws and some kind of satchel draped over his shoulders. I’m almost worried that I’ll have to deal with this guy taking to sky where I’ll have trouble getting him but from my position I can see that they must really like their chicken wings.
That leaves me with another unknown, the unicorn. No matter what amount of weirdness that this world has thrown at me since I got here, there has always been one true constant; to do even the simplest magic you need a unicorn with an intact horn. In fact, that rule is so important that all the Peach family heads that I’ve had to deal with in the past have all been unicorns… or that one that turned himself into a pseudo-alicorn, but that’s neither here nor there. And, while I would love to think that Celestia had been taking care of this little problem in my absence, but the family had never had non-pony members before I was imprisoned, so that instantly rules out these just being a few stragglers.
Unfortunately, I can’t wait for the leader to show as they seem to be ready to start moving again, so I move to get the drop on that big bitch to keep her from running away. Thing is, I needed a distraction; which I spot hanging from a tree branch over the group. With a flick of the wrist I send a small knife flying to neatly sever the large hornets’ nest from its perch high in the branches. Then, by the power of cartoon shenanigans, it lands squarely on the griffin’s head like a football helmet.
“Oh sweet Celestia,” he seriously can’t doing what I think he’s about to do, “not the hornets! My eyes! They’re in my eyes! They’re in my eyes!” I can’t help but choke on a laugh at that. This was probably the dumbest thing I could have done as every undead head immediately swivels in my direction. That’s when the little mare holds up a knife that I recognize as the one that I had just thrown, which tells me that the hornet nest must have been empty as well, I guess they’re smarter than they look. With a quick motion I find the knife that was formerly held in the green mares hoof is now buried up to its hilt in my sternum, good aim but ultimately useless as it melts back into my body. Deciding I better play along since they know something is watching them I do the first thing that comes to mind, I do my best bear growl.
“Bear. Sounds injured,” comes the response from old stallion. Good thing my acting sucks. “Go check it out Cobbler while your Maw and me get this crap off a Junior’s head.” With a nod, Cobbler begins to slowly make her way in my direction. I give her a little clue as to my location with a few grunts and a shake of the bush I’m hiding in.
I don’t have to wait long for a green hoof to make a hole in my hide away. The look on her face when she locks eyes with me is, in a word, priceless. If I still had a face I would have given her the most evil look I could.
“Bitch says ‘what’.” I whisper as low as I can.
“Wha-,” is as far as she gets in response before I punch her in her slack jawed face, sending her flying out of the undergrowth and right into Junior, separating him from his special helmet in the process. Let it be said, I’ll never hit a lady but I will beat a bitch.
“Cobbler? Cobbler, what happened!?!” shouts out the old stallion as he moves to, what I’m assuming is, his daughter’s side as she rolls on the ground screaming in pain as blood dribbles around the hooves she has pressed against the end of her snout. I guess that’s my cue.
“She forgot her pic-a-nic basket bribe,” I say stepping out of my hiding place and releasing my Hellfire for maximum burn, “so I had to teach her about the bear-knuckle necessities of life.” These are the jokes folks; feel free to laugh at any time.
“What the hell are you talking about freak,” the old stallion responds. Still no unicorn, guess this is just a raiding party.
“Freak?” I shoot back in my most indignant voice, “I’d rather be a freak than a bunch of inbred, foalnappers.” At which I look to the girls to see if they can take a hint. Three looks of awe and wonder and three looks of pants wetting terror, yep, I guess a little bit of initiative in the escape department was too much to ask.
“Well at least I don’t have a short fuse,” counters the griffin, with a strangely Irish accent, as he steps to the front of the group.
“Short fuse?” I ask confusedly, before I hear a very distinct hissing sound. Looking down I just manage to see a small bundle of grey-brown sticks before the hissing stops and my world became light and pain as I was sent flying.
‘I hate fucking undead,’ I think to myself as my eyes readjust and I try and shake the cobwebs loose from my spinning head. Before I can get up, however, I hear something coming closer. It’s that damn griffin.
“Nice to see that little firecracker didn’t take you out,” he says standing over me. I decide to play along to see if he’ll drop his guard so that I can handle him without any more explosions. “First, you drop a hornet’s nest on me ‘ead, I’m afraid of hornets. Then, you punch me sister in ‘er face. That makes this all kinds o’ personal, so it’s me claws I’ll be doing you in wit’.”
“Don’t forget,” I fake wheeze, “I also killed your brother.” I can see the rage boiling over in his eyes. Good.
“Somepony shoulda told you mate, never give a Griffin a reason to hate you,” he spits stepping right up into my face, his final mistake.
“And somepony should have told you,” I say shooting an arm out faster than he can respond and wrapping my fingers around his throat. “That a little firecracker like that wouldn’t even break the top twenty of times I’ve been blown up in my life.” I’m on my feet again now with this soon to be re-dead griffin in my out stretched hand.
“They also should have warned you,” I say bringing him close as he struggles to break free of my grip, his claws doing little more than leaving long gashes that quickly heal. “You. Don’t. FUCK. With kids. While I’m around.” With one fluid motion I shove my free hand into his chest, grab the first thing that I feel moving, and squeeze until I feel it pop. I see that perverted light in his eyes go out as I extract my hand, still clutching the rotten remains of what used to be this thing’s heart.
That’s when all hell broke loose with a howling wind carrying the voices of damned souls and something all too familiar slams into my side. It feels weird and it had a significant amount of force behind it but not enough to do any damage. Looking up at the source I see it, the old stallion, he’s the new head of the family and the nub of what used to be a horn, that I couldn’t see for the hat he’s no longer wearing, glowing with a sickly green corpse light.
Without warning he fires a shot of that green light straight at my face and on instinct I drop what remained of the griffin and reach out and grab the magic, something I’ve never been able to do before. Before that fact can sink in though, the light begins to shimmer and shake, taking the ghostly image of a very scared mare in a maids outfit. She looks at me terrified with ghostly tears running down her translucent cheeks. This asshole is using stolen and enslaved souls as a weapon and magic fuel, a very big no-no in the cosmic scheme of things, especially for me; the dead deserve peace.
“Please,” she begs, barely above a whisper, “help me.” In a quick flash of flames I send her on to final judgment, it's all I could do at that point.
“So, you're a unicorn with an impotency problem who uses the souls of those you've killed to power your spells,” I give him, what I can only hope he takes as, a look of utter contempt, “Looks like you get Daddy's belt.” I start moving toward him again as I pull the long strip of leather free from my pants and let it hang freely from fist.
He puts up only a token defense as I close the distance, each energy shot from him only eliciting a flick of the wrist and a flash of flame from me. I'm on him before he thinks to put up a shield, for what little good it would do, and with a lightning quick strike that pathetic thing he calls a horn goes flying off into the underbrush.
“Any last words?” I growl down at him.
“P-p-please don-,” I don't let him finish before I start. With an almost mechanical rhythm the leather strikes hard and deep over and over again. Each blow eliciting new screams of pain as it rips flesh from bone. I hear something else screaming and a commotion a short distance away, the mare must be begging for this sack of shit's life... it’s not going to change anything, so I just ignore it.
Before long I'm just slapping random wet chunks around the clearing, so I drop my blood soaked belt and turn to the last member of the Peach family. She's dropped the leashes and is staring at what used to be, I'm assuming, her husband as tears flow freely from her eyes. She begins to shiver as I make my way towards her.
“It's time,” I say stopping in front of her. She doesn't try to run or beg for her life, she just keeps starring at what used to be her husband as I reach out to take her head in my hands. With a swift jerk and a twist she falls to the ground watching the stars through the canopy.
Looking around to see if the little pack of fillies has run off to, I spot them huddled together next to a tree at the edge of the clearing and my blood goes cold. Lying next to the tree is a small bundle of yellow and red... and it's not moving. I find myself moving before I realize it and nearly break into a run to get to the downed filly, a thousand thoughts run through my mind as I close the distance and none of them are good.
“Stop! Don't come any closer freak!” The shout stops me in my tracks as I realize a small pink filly is standing between me and Applebloom. “I won't let you hurt her like you did to those mean ponies!” She's scared out of her mind, I can see it in her tear reddened eye, the other swollen shut. That's when I notice all the others are in covered in similar bruises and cuts, either they had tried to run before or these assholes had been that rough on them, either way... death had been too good for the lot of them.
“And what makes you think I want to hurt her?” I say as gently as I can, squatting down to get on her level a bit more.
“Because you're just another monster, like they were! And don't tell me you're not, I saw you come out of that painting just like the Crusaders!” I can see her courage starting to break as new tears begin collecting in the corner of her good eye.
“Really? Why do you care? She's just another Blank Flank, isn't that right?” I know I'm laying on a little thick, but I'm not in the mood for this crap.
“No! You're wrong!” This time from Silver Spoon as she and the other fillies move next to the shaking Diamond Tiara.
“We're friends now, and nothings gonna change that,” this time from Scootaloo, which was a little odd for me to hear.
“Yeah!” They all chorus as that courage that quickly faded from Diamond resurfaces on the faces of the whole group.
“That's easy to say when they’ve got your back for once, but let’s be honest with ourselves, as soon as this is all over and you're all back home; you're going back to doing what you usually do,” I respond fully aware that what little time I had is ticking away but I needed to get this handled first.
“That's a lie!” she shouts back at me, that courage morphing into hate towards me.
“You sure about that? You see, I got this ability that lets me see everything, good or bad, that a pony has ever done in their life and normally kids like you don't show up on it. Of course, that's under normal circumstances, this time I able to use it to track you, Diamond Tiara. Do you realize the kinds of things that you have to do for that to happen? Of course you don't, at least not at first, for some of the things I see in you I should turn you into mulch right where you stand.” I pause and let the gravity of what I just said sink in before I continue.
“But, with all that has happened tonight and with your friends by your side I can tell you'll make a full recovery,” I say, placing my hand on her head and petting her dirty mane.
“Wha- what?” she stammers, unsure about how to handle this new development.
“As I said,” I continue, “I can also see the good a pony has done. And in your words I see no deceit, no treachery, nothing bad of any kind. I see that the feelings you hold for your new friends is strong and sincere. Hell, the fact you are willing to stand up to me, the Spirit of Vengeance, tells me that you six will go far with each other’s help. Now, can one of you please tell me what happened to Applebloom so that I can make sure that all six of you make it out of this?” I stand up at that and step over the short wall of pony children and make my way to the downed filly's side.
“While that mean mare was d-distracted by you I-I bit her so that she w-would drop the l-leashes so we could run a-away. An-And she did, but it made her m-mad an-and s-she tried to h-hit me b-but A-Applebloom p-pushed me out of the way a-and she got hit instead,” she stammers as I breathe a sigh of relief. The kid probably just got knocked out cold or, at the worst, she has a concussion... but then the crying filly continues,” t-then she goes f-f-flying and h-hit this tree.”
That last bit of information drives me to my knees beside the little yellow form as I rip my gloves from hands. Reaching out to the side of her neck with two boney fingers I feel for a pulse only to get... nothing. My heart almost stops and I feel a cold chill much like the one already setting into the little Apple's frame run down my spine.
“Not like this,” I whisper under my breathe as I take the still form in my arms and bring it to my chest and I begin a quiet prayer to whatever being is out there that has guided me to this point, “I don't know who you are or why you've chosen to punish me like this but you can't have this one. You can make my life worse, torment me for all eternity, but you are not going to get this little filly, not while I draw breath. In fact as far as I see it, you owe me a Benny, and I'm cashing it in. And if you don't let me have this one thing... then the next one I come for will be you.” As far as prayers go it wasn't the best, but for what I needed done it was all I had. I didn't care if I was struck dead in the process. A little girl would live and an old man would die; a fair trade in my book.
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Applejack sat on the front porch of her family home and starred out over the orchards as the first rays of daylight began to split the night sky. Dash had left hours ago to go get the rest of their friends together so that they could mount their own search party. It wasn't that she didn't trust the flaming being from the night before, especially with how Dash actually took orders from it, but she just didn't trust that thing. She couldn't help but idling stroke her father's old crossbow that had always hung above the mantle, she knew it was probably over kill but she couldn't just let who ever this was get away with taking her sister and her friends even if she was an Element of Harmony.
She was pulled from her thoughts of revenge by movement and light from the edge of the Everfree. Deciding that she couldn't wait to see if she should have pulled that things head off and went after her sister herself she got up from her seat and set to walking.
It didn't take her long to see what she wanted. The creature, walking with its arms crossed in front of its chest, and five beaten and crying fillies walking along with it.
'Wait. Five?' she thought to herself before she realized one very important filly was missing from the group. That's when she noticed that the creature was carrying something and over its arms she could see a tattered pink bow.
“What did you do with my sister!?!” screamed the irate mare as she charged the Rider, intent on bringing it to its knees, only to be stopped by a pack of fillies trying to hold her back.
“What did you do!?! What the fuck did you do to my sister!?! We trusted you! We trusted you! And now my sister is dead! I'll kill you, you bastard! I'll fucking kill you and piss on your grave!” she continued to shriek at the top of her lungs as she strained against the fillies trying their best to restrain her. Subconsciously she was holding back as she knew she could power through the group like it was nothing but she just couldn't bring herself to hurt them any further than she could see they already were.
“Answer me, damn it!” she shouted as she felt the tears begin to fall from eyes in despair. Yet, the Rider did nothing but continue walking towards her. He stopped mere feet from her rage and anguish filled eyes and placed the body of the little yellow filly on the ground. Turning away from the scene before him, the Rider began trudging back toward the Everfree.
“Get the fuck back here! I'm not done with you yet bastard!” But to no avail, he continued to ignore her and the group of fillies held their grip. That is when she heard a voice.
“Applejack?” it wheezed, “Is it morning already? Why am I out in the orchard?” Applejack couldn't believe what she had heard, and just like a faint breeze, her rage and the feeling of the fillies holding her back faded away as if they had never been. In an instant she had Applebloom in her arms as tears of joy streamed freely from eyes to fall into the little filly's red mane, as all her hatred and thoughts of the Rider were washed away with the morning sun.
Author's Notes:
Here it is folks, just like I promise. I'm not sure if I layed it on a bit too thick there towards the end, but I'm satisfied with the out come. The next chapter will have a bit of a palette cleanser, I promise.
As always: Comments, Questions, and Critiques in Comments. Have a wonderful day.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=isbrDvdmpqI
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