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Good morning, and welcome to the first scenario of the NON-LOGICAL ALTERNATIVE STORY CHAPTER. We're glad to offer you our services. Please, remember that the NON-LOGICAL ALTERNATIVE STORY CHAPTER scenarios do not follow a linear timeline; future and past scenarios are not only possible, but completely expected. Please, do not observe the following scenario until you've made it till [ THIRD CHAPTER: OH, FOR CELESTIA'S SAKE, NOW I MESSED UP THE TITLE TOO... ]

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The only thing Pinkamena saw was something that looked like a cloud, only far denser and completely white. She couldn't move, she couldn't look away, and she didn't know where the hell she was. The only thing she could see was that white cloud.

It surrounded her, and then she heard a poof noise, and then it dissappeared. Just like that.

First thing she noticed: she could move now. Second thing: she was completely alone. Third thing: she was in what seemed to be Twilight's library, standing right in front of one of the seemingly endless shelves of that tree.

"Okay," she muttered, "this doesn't look good at all."

Well, she had no idea what was happening. The story had ended, right? They had defeated Greentalk, and then the happy ending had come, and then...

Oh, right. Then Aragón had said that 'it' wasn't over. Cue giant, weird cloud and random library out of nowhere.

"Well, fuck me," she said. "Are you telling me we're doing this again?"

"Pinkamena?"

Apparently she wasn't completely alone, Pinkamena thought as she turned around to the main door of the library. There it was, right in front of her: Twilight Sparkle, wearing that maid dress of her, holding a cup of something hot with her telekinesis. The unicorn closed the door and smiled at her warmly. "Welcome to my realm," she said, approaching her. "I'm glad you could make it."

"Twilight?" Pinkamena frowned and examined her friend. She looked happy. "Is it really you? What's happening? Where am I?"

“Answering your first question, I think I'm really me," replied Twilight. She took a sip of the liquid in his cup –tea, Pinkamena thought; it smelled like tea– and after a little sigh, she smiled again. "However, we can't really be sure, right? After all, if I wasn't Twilight, I wouldn't tell you."

"It was a rhetorical question," said Pinkamena. "You see, I don't have any fucking idea where I am right now. Or what is happening. Or... well, I don't have any idea about anything, period." She licked her lips and looked at Twilight. "But, you know, this is getting old. I bet that I can ask whatever I want, but you're going to get all cryptic on me, and then nothing will be clear and something exciting or stupid will happen and then BAM! End of the chapter. It's what always happens in here."

Twilight said nothing, taking another sip of tea instead. Pinkamena took it as a chance to keep talking.

"Well," she said, "I guess that I am right then. So." She looked around. "We're in your tree."

Twilight swallowed her tea. "Eyup."

"And we're alone?"

"Eeeyup."

"And you talked about this place as 'your realm'."

"If I remember correctly, that's what I did."

"Which is probably the most ominous name you can give to what otherwise looks like an ordinary tree."

Twilight chuckled. "That's your opinion."

"So... yeah." Pinkamena kicked the floor. "This is definitely fishy as hell. Either you're not Twilight or this isn't your house. Or both." She snorted. “Both looks like the most probable option here.”

“Hmm?” Twilight finally finished her tea. With a ‘poof!’, the cup disappeared. “Well, that’s certainly an interesting theory. I guess you’re still a clever one.”

“Why would I stop being clever?” Pinkamena sighed. “See? This is what I was talking about. The real Twilight wouldn’t just stand there and say ambiguous things about everything. You’re clearly an impostor… or another alternative Twilight.” She frowned and looked at the ceiling. “Or this could be the future. It’s not like it would be a surprise, after all… We’ve messed with timelines a lot already. Is this the future?”

“Do you really think I will answer that question?” Twilight rolled her eyes. “I mean, come on, girl. I’m being cryptic, you’ve been teleported here without any kind of explanation, the situation is mysterious as can be… Do you really think I will just say ‘it’s the future’ and call it a day? That would be stupid.”

Pinkamena nodded. “Yeah, I guess so. So, this is the future?”

“Of course it is.”

“Predictable.” Pinkamena yawned. “Okay, so let me guess again, because you’re not going to tell me anything unless I am the one speaking–”

“Technically,” Twilight said, “I will tell you a lot of things if you let me. It’s just that I’m going to be obscure as hell.”

“But if I guess something and it turns out to be right, you’re going to say something funny or mysterious about it,” said Pinkamena. “Or you’re going to smile, or something like that.”

“True. It’s how this entire thing works.”

“Yeah.” The earth pony smiled. “You know, Greentalk was never this meta. It’s refreshing.”

“Thank you!” Twilight smiled back. “I try to learn from everybody. Even Greentalk can teach you a couple things, if you know where to look.”

“Obviously, that means you’re not Greentalk.”

“Well, I’m not talking in green.” Twilight chuckled. “That should give you a clue, right?”

“Also you’re acting as a very nice gal.”

“Eyup.”

“Which means you’re not nice. At all.”

“Eeeyup.”

“You’re the next villain of this story.”

“Bullseye!”

“Well, at least you’re being open about it.” Pinkamena turned around and started to walk through that library she knew so well. “Ok, so you’re a baddie. Usually, this is the point in which I would ask you why am I here, or what is this place, or where is everypony.”

“That would be the standard procedure,” said Twilight. “Aaaand you’re not gonna do that?”

“It would be stupid, and you would answer something stupid.” Pinkamena shook her head. “No. You see, I’m sure this is going to end soon, so I want to be efficient.” She turned to Twilight. “You see, I was going to ask you who you are. But then I realized –it would be useless, as the narration is telling me you’re Twilight.”

“Exactly.” Twilight sat on the floor. “But we have a very unreliable narrator, right? Maybe she’s lying?”

“It could be possible.” Pinkamena nodded. “But if that’s the case, then why would you be so open about being the villain? Where’s the drama in that? This story is pretty simple: it always tries to surprise the reader at the last moment.”

“True.”

“And the real Twilight Sparkle being the villain would be a pretty big surprise, right?”

“Yes.” Twilight sighed. “You see? That’s the bad thing about the clever ones. You’re no fun. If you’re not going to scream or cry for help, then what am I supposed to do?”

“Nothing at all.” Pinkamena raised an eyebrow. “Come on, I’ve killed countless ponies. You’re not going to scare me.”

“I see that,” Twilight said. “I mean, I guess that I was already expecting you to be so impassive, but this is a little ridiculous. I’m bringing you to my house without any warning and telling you I’m a villain, and you’re not even blinking. Bet that if I told you I was going to kill you you would just laugh.”

“Been there, done that, honey.”

The unicorn shook her head, apparently disappointed. “Well, that’s what I get when I try to scare the only friend of mine that started her career as a cold-blooded killer.”

“You also went for the genius,” Pinkamena said. “Forgive my humility.”

“No sense being humble when it’s you who’s talking.” Twilight smiled. “However, you should at least give me a chance, right? To scare you and the like.”

“I guess.”

“Hmm.” Twilight waved a hoof to point at the entire house. “You see this? The library?”

“Yes.”

“It’s not my real library.”

“Woah. I’m totes surprised.”

“Save me the sarcasm.” Twilight stuck out her tongue at Pinkamena. “Well, so yeah. This is not my real library. Of course, that forces me to explain that technically nothing is real, because we’re in a fanfic. Even if we were in the main story and we went to my house, it wouldn’t be my real library at all.”

“Of course. We’re all fictional, after all.”

“Yes. But obviously, what I mean here is that this is not the library that exists in the world where you fought Greentalk.”

Pinkamena licked her lips. “I see. So, what is this?”

“Well, I’m not going to tell you the exact thing,” Twilight said, “but I guess that telling you this is a computer simulation is ambiguous enough, right?”

Pinkamena blinked. “Excuse me, but what?”

“Oh, a normal reaction!” Twilight clapped her hooves in excitement. “Finally!”

“Did you just said what I think you said?”

“If you’re not sure, you can read the sentence again.” Twilight shrugged. “We all can break the fourth wall, after all.”

“What the everlasting fuck?!”

“It’s just that some of us can break the fourth wall a little better than you.” Twilight smirked. “You can’t read the beginning of this chapter, but trust me –this is a computer.”

“Is this a sci-fi shit now?! How does that work?!”

“Well, we’ve always been in the Internet, so technically this shouldn’t be considered sci-fi,” the unicorn said. “You could say we’re just going even more meta.”

“That’s fucking stupid!”

“Yeah, you can also word it that way.” Twilight shrugged. “It has a justification, of course. Why are we a computer simulation? Well, I’m not telling you. You can think about this as a knock-off of the Matrix, but it’s not like that, at all.” She frowned and looked at her hooves. “Wait, I think that didn’t make sense for you.” She raised her head. “Well, that was for the readers then, I guess.”

“Excuse me, but you’re not making any sense!” Pinkamena approached Twilight and looked right in the eye. “You’re telling me that we are literally inside a computer?”

“We’ve always been–”

“I mean inside of the story!” Pinkamena waved a hoof. “Yes, we’re fictional; yes, we’ve been always on the Internet so that means we’re always in a computer, but I am not talking about that! I’m asking if, inside our story, we’re in a computer too!”

“Well, there’s no way I’m gonna answer that,” replied Twilight, annoyed. “Go figure, that would be stupid!”

Pinkamena sighed. “So this is a computer?”

“A computer simulation, yes.” Twilight said.

“And of course, when you said ‘my realm’, you were referring to the entire simulation, not just this tree.” Pinkamena sighed. “And… wait a fucking minute –are we real?”

“I don’t know. Are we?”

Pinkamena rolled her eyes. “No, we aren’t. Stupid question, my bad. Are we digital projections of our fictional selves?”

“I don’t know. Are we?”

“You think you’re funny?”

“Everything’s funny when you’re in control,” replied Twilight with a smirk. “You see, you were right with the bit about my realm. This is a fictional, non-logical space completely under my will.”

“But I can move.” Pinkamena frowned. “And you were annoyed before… so you’re not controlling me. Not completely, at least.”

“I could have been faking that. Maybe I like to play with you?”

“That’s not your style.” Pinkamena shook her head. “I know you, Twilight. You’re not stupid. If you could control me, you would be doing it. Why take any risks with me? I’m dangerous. So you lied –this is your realm, but you’re not the boss yet.”

Twilight said nothing, still smirking. Then, her horn gleamed, and the same cup as before appeared in the air, again filled with what smelled like tea. Red tea, specifically, thought Pinkamena.

“Good one,” said the unicorn. “Quite the logic leap you’ve taken there.”

“There’s more,” Pinkamena said. “You’re a unicorn. No wings.” She pointed at Twilight’s back. “You think I didn’t notice that? I know you were supposed to be an alicorn. It’s the kind of information that our author and readers would know, after all.”

“So you know it because the readers knew it?”

“Exactly! But here’s the thing: in this fanfic, I’ve never seen you with wings.” Pinkamena shook her head. “You were a unicorn during the first story, and only turned an alicorn later. So, I can’t imagine you flying.”

Twilight said nothing.

“So, let’s recapitulate a little, okay?” Pinkamena’s eyes gleamed. “This is a computer simulation, you said. Those usually mess with your brain, right? Matrix comes to mind right now.”

“…This is not like the Matrix,” muttered Twilight.

“Doesn’t matter.” Pinkamena waved a hoof dismissively. “The important bit here is: in your mind?” she pointed at Twilight. “You’re an alicorn. In the readers? You’re an alicorn.” She pointed at her head. “But here? You’re still a unicorn, honey. And if I can decide how do I choose to see you, then you’re not almighty.”

Twilight said nothing.

“And as I said,” Pinkamena continued, “you’re practical. If you were in control of that, you would appear as an alicorn, because it’s more powerful. So I’m controlling part of this world.”

Twilight sighed. “Of course you are, Pinkamena.” She frowned. “Of course you are. That’s the reason why I am so cold, too. I am the ruler of this place, but I have to take part of the mind of whoever is in here to actually rule it.”

“Doesn’t make any sense, but I’m cool with it.” Pinkamena smirked. “Now we’re even.”

“As a matter of fact, we are not.” Twilight took another sip of tea. “You see, you’re just a chess piece. I’m the one playing the game.” She smiled. “Want some proof? You can’t move now.”

Pinkamena tried to say something. She couldn’t. She tried to move –impossible. She was paralyzed. It would have been pretty scary, if it hadn’t been the most common tactic of Greentalk.

“Oh, cry me a river.” Twilight rolled her eyes. “It works, so why change it? You can’t move or talk, after all.”

Pinkamena had to agree on that. However, she thought, the fact that her narrator was still talking kinda defeated the whole purpose of being forcefully quiet.

“Well, being the only one talking is not very fun,” said Twilight. “Besides, I didn’t do this so I could shut your mouth.”

What? Well, that was a surprise, Pinkamena thought.

“Hey, I don’t need to be predictable all the time.” Twilight took another sip of tea. “Anyway, we have to end this soon, so I’m going to be quick.
“You are here for four reasons, Pinkamena. First one: so you can know I am the villain. Second one: because you’re a menace and I need to take care of this. Third: I won’t tell you this one!” She smirked. “And fourth…”

“Because, well, I can kill you pretty easily if you’re here. Death by snakes!”

Twilight finished that sentence with a bright smile, and then she turned around and walked away. Pinkamena couldn’t follow her with her eyes, but she could see a snake falling from the ceiling. And then another one. And a third snake. She felt something biting her in the rear.

Soon, the room was flooding with snakes. But Pinkamena had been dead long before that.

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Second scenario:

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Good morning, and welcome to the second scenario of the NON-LOGICAL ALTERNATIVE STORY CHAPTER. We're glad to offer you our services. Please, remember that the NON-LOGICAL ALTERNATIVE STORY CHAPTER scenarios do not follow a linear timeline; future and past scenarios are not only possible, but completely expected. Please, do not observe the following scenario until you've made it till [ Fourth chapter: This was surprisingly easy. *Beeeep*, dear, do you want me to narrate? Yes? Ok, then I'll be the one doing all the talk. Ahem... ]

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The poof noise returned, and the white cloud did it too. Pinkamena wasn't really expecting it to happen again, although this time she didn't feel as surprised at the last time.

And then she was in the same spot as before: inside Twilight's library. However, she wasn't completely alone. Twilight Sparkle was there too, although she had wings now.

"Again?" Pinkamena asked, facing Twilight. "I thought you had already killed me, although I admit it wasn't really effective. At least you got wings this time."

The alicorn shook her head. She looked pretty scared, noticed Pinkamena. "N-no! It's me! The real Twilight!"

Pinkamena blinked. "What?"

"I say I'm not the Twilight that attacked you!" She looked around, frowning. "I saw a white cloud and then I appeared here, just like you said." She glanced at Pinkamena again. "Is this the place where...?"

"Where I was killed by snakes, yeah." The pink pony nodded. "But if you're the real Twilight, then where's the one from the future? The one that attacked me?"

"Right behind you."

The two ponies turned around as fast as they could. There she was, in front of the main door of the library -another Twilight Sparkle. She also had wings this time. "I have wings because you've finally seen me with them," she explained. "Remember? I already explained it to you."

"What do you want?" Twilight (the present one) gulped and stared at her dopplegänger. "Why are we here?"

"Mostly because nopony can read what you say here," said the other alicorn. "I just thought you had something to talk about in private."

Pinkamena frowned and looked at her Twilight. Her Twilight glared back without a word.

"After all, you've been attacked by the Twilight from the future. Also known as me," said the second Twilight. "And Twilight has had an encounter with your future self, Pinkamena. Maybe you could talk about it." Then, she just turned away and opened the door. "Bye."

And then she was gone.

Pinkamena raised an eyebrow. "At least she was quick," she said. Then she turned at the alicorn that was still in that room. "So... should we follow her advice and talk?"

Twilight shrugged. "Why not? What's the worst thing that could happen?"

"We could get killed by snakes."

"Oh, right. That."

Two hours later, two white clouds appeared again and both ponies went away.

You have successfully finished the second scenario of the NON-LOGICAL ALTERNATIVE STORY CHAPTER. Thank you very much.

Third scenario: LOCKED.