Hello, everypony. I am the Critique.

Well, I’m not going to lie, I’m a little bit embarrassed today. A couple weeks ago I mentioned that Luna was going to get her due in a terrible story where she acts completely out of character. I had sharpened my axe and was ready to test it out on the sequel to Cielo’s Secret.

You all remember that one? The one where Luna and Celestia are drooling idiots and all the other characters are somehow worse. But as I went to the search page where I had left the story, I come back to find this…

Yeah, kind of difficult to review a story that doesn’t exist anymore. Man, I can’t tell you how this ruined all my plans. All my jokes about Luna are now just sitting there waiting for something to be thrown at. Like a set of darts without a dartboard.

With no information, my panicking self needed to scrounge together a review fast and I’ll be damned if I was doing another ‘Poncho Chronicles.’

So, ‘Fuck it’, I said. ‘Let’s review a sequel to a story I only did a few months ago.Wrath of the Titans.’

Wrath of the Titans: But Mr. Critique, you’ve already beaten up the first story of my incredibly long drawn out series only a few months ago. Why don’t you give me a break?

Look, it’s nothing personal, Wrath. It’s just that, I needed a sequel to review that was quick and you were the only one available. It’s not my fault! This wouldn’t happen if Cielo would take his beating like a stallion instead of being a pussy!

Yes, maybe I am bitter! Shut up!

Nothing left to do, but get started with the review with a little backstory. Most of you might remember the ‘Clash of the Titans’ review. If you don’t, watch the 2010 remake starring Sam Worthington, replace all the characters with My Little Pony characters, and come up with a dumb reason for a sequel. Trust me, you couldn’t come up with anything dumber than this story did.

For those who haven’t seen the movie and have no intention of seeing it, to which I don’t blame you, Gods mad at Twilight, for some reason. Celestia and Luna go to kill Medusa even though women cannot enter her lair… for some reason. And Lucifer is part of the Greek pantheon. For some reason.

That’s about all you really need to know to get this story rolling.

Now, let’s start bashing on the sequel.

Our story begins one month after the defeat of Cetus, the Blue Serpent. Yes, let’s get this joke out of the way.

Back to the review.

Celestia and Luna start talking about their mother- Funny, I don’t remember Lauren Faust appearing in the last story- When Discord interrupts them.

"Hey ladies!"Said Discord and he's appear out from thin air upon their thrones.

"What're young doing here Discord?!"Asked Celestia.

… I really don’t have a joke there. Trust me, I tried. None of them worked. The best I came up with is how consistent the grammar and spelling are to the previous story. The talking head syndrome is still a major thing, like it’s going out of style and the complete lack of emotions or the backgrounds that is supposed to be set up.

I mean, it does mention we are in the Canterlot Throne Room, so I guess that’s better than nothing.

Not by much.

So, I guess Discord moved back to Olympus … for some reason… I guess it has something to do with him coming back from the dead in the last one, but that’s never fully explained.

Discord gives Celestia and Luna a letter from their father, Zeus. However, instead of actually opening it and reading it, this happens…

2 Hours Later in the Bedroom of Princess Celestia…

"BOOM!"

"What just-?!" asked Celestia and she's saw her father is standing before her.

"It's look like that you didn't read my mail from Discord." said Zeus.

Well, it did come with a spyware warning. She’s not going to open mail without proper security measures. After all, she’s a princess and a ruler of a nation. Do you know how much security a letter goes through before she gets to read my hate mail to her? Unless of course it’s Twilight’s mail. Because she’s so special.

"Why don't you send Hermes to come in the first place?" asked Celestia.

"He's kind of 'busy'... with a beautiful Pegasus girl in Couldsdales." said Zeus.

Meaning that Pan was being born. … Greek Mythology sex humor.

"As that you see when Lord Tirek had escaped..." said Zeus.

"Cerberus is now start to be uncontrollable and the Walls of Tartarus... start to be destroying..." said Celestia.

So, if Celestia knows about Lord Tirek escaping, why did Zeus send a letter to her? Or maybe that’s why she didn’t read the letter, because she knew it would contain information that she already knew. Still kind of rude, Celestia.

Also, apparently the Walls of Tartarus are going to be destroying us all.

"If the mortals still don't pray for the Olympians, we all will become mortals like them.

We all will died and the Titans will escape and destroy the whole entire land of Equestria.

In the air, underwater and the whole entire land. All will be destroyed by the Titans," said Zeus.

Okay, I get the losing your powers thing, since it was pretty much established that praying gives the gods their power, but how will the Titans escape even if you die? There’s no real explanation of why the Titans will be released.

Does Tirek have the power to release the titans? And even if he did, the only reason I would think that he would release them is to steal their magic. Why are they worried about the Titans if Tirek is the larger threat?

I don’t know. Let’s see if the story makes any sense of it.

"You are asking help from me and my sister?" asked Celestia.

"Me and my brothers need all children to help. But mostly refuse amd take care of themselves only," said Zeus.

Zeus: Well, we want our children to help, but mostly we want to refuse it and take care of ourselves.

Celestia: So… why did you ask for our help if you are just going to refuse it?

Zeus: Look, we’re very inconsistent gods. I mean look at me, I can’t stay with one woman for more than a few hours.

So, Celestia refuses to help the gods deal with the Titans. Even though if she doesn’t, the Titans will destroy everything. As Zeus puts it, the air, the land and the water will die out. Hm… Let me think about this for a second… The Titans are going to destroy the air, which ponies need to breathe. They are going to destroy the land… which the ponies live on… And they are going to destroy the water… which ponies need to survive… And Celestia… is just … not going to do anything about it.

Maybe I was wrong. Maybe this is the story where I can use all my Luna jokes.

We then cut to Tartarus where Zeus gathers Hades, Poseidon, Balius and Xanthius to help keep the Titans and Tirek in line. Balius and Xanthius (more commonly known as Xanthus), if you are unfamiliar with Greek Mythology, are two horses that were given to King Peleus by Poseidon and were said to be as powerful as gods. The horses would later be given to his son, Achilles.

But I doubt Achilles will appear in this story. So, let’s just move on.

While in the underworld, the group meets with Lucifer and Hades’s wife, Persephone.

My brother, who thrown me into the Underworld to be a slave of another brother of mine.

Now... had come to find a peace for his own," said Lucifer.

Um… Celestia was the one who went Saint Michael on your ass, bro… Not Zeus. Well, at least the story of this is as consistent with its prior story as the original ‘Wrath of the Titans’ with ‘Clash of the Titans.’

But, big surprise, Lucifer betrays the group and the gods are captured by Lord Tirek.

"You did so well... Pride of Ixion..." said Lucifer and the large dark brown Centaur named Pride of Ixion jumps down from the cliff to Lucifer.

Oh, I’m sorry. I must have made a mistake. You see, this is supposed to be Lord Tirek. I think… Let me check…

Then a large dark brown horned Centaur appear on the top of mountain upon them.

No, not there…

ATTACK!" shouted Dark Brown Centaur and the two upper bodies, pony-like creatures called Makhais start to throw lava to them.

No, not there either…

"Now your turn Zeus..." said Pride of Ixion and Zeus is prepare to fight with the evil Centaur but then, something hit him at head from behind.

So, who the fuck is this guy?!

…

…

He’s an antagonist from the Clash of the Titans video game?

… Why is there this centaur from the Clash of the Titans video game, when you already established a centaur character with Lord Tirek?!

And I check the date that this story was published! This story was published in October of 2014! The season 4 finale took place on May 2014! There is no reason to replace Lord Tirek with this no name centaur with nothing connecting him to the movie and nothing connecting him to the MLP show! So, why would you decide to replace a villain that most bronies are aware of and replace him with a villain that nobody knows about?! Alienating your audience?!

There’s trying to get people interested in the crossover material and then there’s choices in those crossover materials that make no sense!

So, … uh… the ‘Pride of Ixion’ and Lucifer attack Zeus and the others, quickly capturing them.

"OUCH!" said Zeus after get the hit and when he's turn to look at. The ones who hurt him were the Demigods, Balius and Xanthius, the one of the eldest children of him.

Yes, Zeus… one of the most badass gods in all of mythology… just said ‘ouch’... Kind of sucks out all the badassness, huh?

And what’s less badass than saying ‘ouch’? Saying it twice of course!

"OUCH! GO!" said Zeus and his treacherous sons hit him again, now to unconsciousness.

Despite them being outnumbered, and outclassed, Persephone and Ares manage to escape with the weapons of the gods. Lucifer vows that revenge against the gods will be his. Look, I know that Lucifer has nothing to do with the Greek Pantheon, but the faster you accept it, the faster we can get through this.

And then we see the story giving up. Yes… only chapter two of this story and it has already given up. What do I mean by that? Well, let me show you something and let me see if you can figure out what happened…

Four days ago: the Entrance of the Underworld…

"BOOM!"

"ROARRR!"

The many of the Bronze Bulls are run out from the entrance, split up and run into many ways. Which one of them are leading to Ponyville.

Present Time: Ponyville…

"BOOM!"

"ROARRR!"

Two Bronze Bulls are run out from the Everfree Forest and breath fire to burning the town.

"ROARRR!"

Confused? Boy, I sure as hell was when I first read this thing. Yeah, the actions scenes in this story are somehow worse than they were in the last one. At least with the last one, the fight scenes were … well, they were terrible, but at least it tried to give some kind of choreography. It failed… but it at least it tried.

We then cut to Luna and Celestia who realize that the Bulls of Hell are attacking Ponyville and need to do something about it. Why can’t they have our main heroes take care of the problem?

"The Bronze Bulls had escaped from Tartarus and burning Ponyville!" said Luna.

"How was that possible?!" asked Celestia.

"I don't know how but with Twilight and her friends are now stay at the Crystal Empire. We have to take them by ourselves!" said Luna.

Yes, apparently Twilight and her gang were part of that big ‘Ponyville to Crystal Empire’ move. Damn you, Crystal Empire. Not only have you stolen our equivalent of the Olympics! You have to steal our Main Six too!

The two princesses teleport to Ponyville and immediately rescue Apple Bloom from the bull creatures. So, I guess when Applejack moved to the Crystal Empire, she forgot to take Apple Bloom with her. This must be the other extreme to Somepony To Watch Over Me. Applejack doesn’t give a shit about any trouble Apple Bloom gets into.

The fight continues with the terrible grammar and spelling that you all expect and the poor excuse for choreography. I’m not going to get into too much detail, because basically every line has something I could make fun of. And unfortunately, because of that, the story’s pacing is rushed as all hell. Meaning there is a lot to get through in only 14000 words.

They fight for a bit, but the bulls seem unbeatable. Not that we could tell since Celestia and Luna seemed to be pummeling them just fine with their magic and abilities of flight, despite bulls breathing fire! So, Celestia gets an idea…

"Not yet but I have an idea," said Celestia.

"What is it?" asked Luna.

"Let them destroy each other!" said Celestia.

"I like this one!" said Luna.

Luna: But I want to keep this fire breathing death bull! Can’t I take him home, sister?

Celestia: Luna, how many times have I told you about bring home strays?! It was that cat last week! Then that manticore! Then that loud mouth pony who only speaks in cuss words!

Luna: Okay, that one was my bad!

The plan works and Luna and Celestia manage to get the two bulls to destroy each other.

"So... victory celebrate?" asked Luna.

"I like that," said Celestia.

"YAY!" said Luna.

They go back home to celebrate and… because pacing is a myth in this story-Yeah, I’m recognizing the pattern too.- Perosophone and Ares appear to explain what happened in Tartarus.

They also explain that the centaur that is not Tirek is from the land where Tirek was born from. IT’S STILL NOT TIREK! IT DOESN’T COUNT!

Ares and Persephone explain that they need to find someone called ‘the Fallen One’. Hephaestus? Satan? Kaminsod? … Marie from Yu-Gi-Oh?

Well, whoever it is, they have to consult the sons of Poseidon to figure out where ‘the Fallen One’ is. Why? Because the movie did the same thing. And it makes about as much sense here as it does there.

It turns out that the sons of Poseidon have relocated to the Crystal Empire… What are the fucking odds? The housing for the Crystal Empire must be fucking top notch or they are on top of a crystal mine… But that would be stupid.

Ares gives Celestia and Luna the weapons of Hades and Poseidon and sends them on their quest. Apparently, giving up their weapons was too much for the two gods and they pass out. Pfft… puny gods.

We then cut to Tartarus where Zeus and the other gods are being tortured by Lucifer and… the Horsemen of Apocalypse. Yeah… apparently they are in this story too. Even though they were destroyed in the last story… Oh, who gives a shit? Let’s just hope Death doesn’t try to get Luna’s moon.

At the Crystal Empire, The Flash… Oh, I’m sorry, Flash Sentry tells Twilight and Cadance about Luna and Celestia's arrival to the Crystal Empire. Don’t worry, he’ll be as useful here as he was in Equestria Girls.

Celestia and Luna explain what happened with the gods to the Main Six… Or at least, I assume they did, we never actually see that. The group asks what Titans are and we get an really confusing backstory thanks to the poor writing.

"They are the elemental beings that ruled this land before Equestria will be found.

During the time that you mortal ponies are just Mesohippus at many million years ago," said Luna.

"The Titans had caused many havoc to this land. They had caused the many extinctions from time to time

since the land that what will become Equestria has been born." said Celestia.

God, and I thought the motive for Murdering Moxie was confusing.

It turns out that Twilight and the rest of the friends happen to know where the sons of Poseidon live.

"Right then, follow me." said Twilight and she walk along with her friends to the place where Triton, Otus and Agenor are live.

In the Dungeon…

Which are surprisingly better than the regular housing of the Crystal Empire. So, why were three demigods imprisoned? They wanted to marry Twilight, Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash. Obviously, because they are the best characters in the show and the other three suck balls.

Keep the hate coming, girls! Soon I’ll have the biggest dick in all of Equestria!

Don’t you mean ‘be the biggest’?

Is that what it’s called?

They ask the Sons of Poseidon where ‘the Fallen One’ is located, but they ask the charges to be dropped and ask for as much ‘gold as heavy as each of us’ as the story puts it.They explain that the Fallen One is on the island of Kail. How they could possibly know that is anyone’s guess, and our group sail off to find it.

A boat that is in Manehattan?

… Why would they set sail from Manehattan if they are in the Crystal Empire… Oh, never mind.

The groups is eventually joined by Discord and the djinn from the last story. Oh, good, I can’t wait to see what extra character he adds to the story. A character who doesn’t speak English and a character who nopony can understand.

Our next chapter begins with us finding out that the Fallen One is indeed Hephaestus. So, why did we call him the Fallen One if he has a name? … Filler, I guess. So, the trident leads the group to the island of Kail. Why did they need the sons of Poseidon to find said island? … Cannonfodder? I don’t fucking know. The movie doesn’t make much sense to begin with, so trying to copy that is taking all the problems with it!

Meanwhile, in Tartarus, Zeus and the others gods are being prepared to be sacrificed to the titan, Kronos. It’s just here to remind us that the bad guys are still bad guys. It’s honestly only a few sentences long and really doesn’t develop anything that we don’t already know.

And then it cuts to… Not Tirek and actual Tirek. Not Tirek explains that he and Tirek can rule the lands once the Titans have destroyed it. Tirek points out the flaw in his plan. The obviously flaw being that everything will be destroyed and nothing will remain, but Not Tirek doesn’t see it that way. And then we get… this line from Tirek…

"I may don't like this 'friendship' of the Ponies and really much want to conquer them for the betrayal of them to the Olympians.

But I'm serve the Olympians, not the Titans. I may have no this 'friendship' that you have with the Titans

but I do have the honor of being as a servant of the Olympians," said Tirek.

So, rather than ruling Equestria and having a group of enslaved ponies… which was his goal in Season 4… he’d rather be imprisoned… just like in Season 4? … You know what… with as much stupid that gets thrown at us in this story… I’m willing to buy this. I’m willing to buy that Tirek has a complete 180 of his character for no fucking reason. Now, can we please go two paragraphs without a single grammar or spelling error?!

"I'm not going to touch this trident again unless it's really necessary!" said Otus and he's let his hand go from the trident.

That’s what I was afraid of.

So our group manages to make it to the Island of Kail, where they enter a forest. Here, we get the tour of Greek Mythological creatures that have no point in being in this story other than to show how much the author knows about Greek Mythology.

It’s been awhile since I’ve done this joke. Every time this story explains information to you that has no point other than to show the author’s knowledge, I will do the same.

Ready? Let’s begin!

"Roc?" asked Twilight.

"The Giant Two-headed Eagles that live once lived in the desert of our. I thought they gone extinct," said Sheikh and then a large carcass is drop down from the high above the canopy.

Did you know that Final Fantasy was supposed to be the last game that the company Square ever made due to bankruptcy? Hence the name.

"What... is that?!" asked Fluttershy and Sheikh Suleimare walks near to the carcass.

"A Rompo, the creature that have head of rabbit, front body of lion and rear body of bear," said Discord.

"Is it dangerous, I mean if it's alive?" asked Applejack.

"It is a herbivore creature but it is a very protective for its territory," said Sheikh.

Did you know that Rhydon is technically the first Pokemon, since he was the one who was designed first, even before the most popular Pokemon, Pikachu or any of the starter Pokemon, Bulbasaur, Charmander or Squirtle?

"What was that?!" asked Rarity and then three gigantic amphibious eels dwell down from the tree and jump out to bite the dead body of Rompo.

"AHHHHHH!" screamed The Girls and Spike.

"Seriously?! They're just the Dandans. I bet that they following the trail of that carcass," said Discord.

Did you know that among older men, vanilla is the most erotic smell?

"I remembered that voice... it's a Dioskilos!" said Celestia.

"Dio-what?!" asked Spike.

"Two-headed giant fox." said Luna and the a Dioskilos run out from the deep of the forest and confront them.

Did you know that Butterflies taste with their feet?

So, after I tried to outdo the guy who is boasting about his intellect, some strange creatures approach them and Celestia comes up with a plan.

"Whatever going to happen. Don't do anything that stupid!" said Celestia and then the rods are come out from

the underground and form into a cage to imprison Triton, Otus and Agenor.

"My sister just said don't do anything that stupid!" said Celestia.

Um… no… You just said that. Two lines?! You can’t even be consistent for two lines?! Or is Celestia disowning Luna?!

And let the ‘Luna White Knights’ come at me! I’ll get that biggest dick award sometime!

They get attacked by a group of creatures and we get a transition… to a second later… What?

"I'll go to check it out," said Celestia and she's walk out from the hind of the tree to see what threw the tree to them.

She's heard a noise of the foot steps coming from the fog. Then, it's revealed to be a 30 ft. tall figure

that have lower part as a pony but the upper part is the chimpanzee-like and its has one eye and a horn on its forehead.

"ROARRR!"

"You got to be kidding me!" said Celestia.

Later…

"Everypony run for your lives!"Said Luna and she's fly out from the fog with her older sister.

Well, technically, it doesn’t say how much later it is. I assume it’s only a few seconds, but then what’s the point of adding it there? Unless this is supposed to be taking place much later, but then that doesn’t make sense either…

Although, having Celestia say ‘You got to be kidding me,’ is kind of funny.

The creatures, or Cyclopes, attack our heroes. Well, I say attack, mostly they just roar at them and if you wish really hard and rub your pinkie and thumb together saying the magic words, maybe you get something that almost thinks about threatening to become a fight scene.

The Princesses form a sword for each of them and landed on the ground. The Cyclops try to use his hand to grab them but

they both poke the swords into his hand. They put their swords deeper and deeper into his hand.

"GRRRAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!" screamed #1 Cyclops

No! He was my number one cyclops!

So, after an entire boring as fuck chapter about our heroes just fighting the Cyclopes, our heroes finally arrive to find Hephaestus. And during this scene, Applejack gives us what I think most of us would agree are very true words to describe this story as a whole.

"That is a ridiculous one." said Applejack.

I think you hit the bullseye there, partner…

So, in a weird conversation with Hephaestus, not helped by the poor word choices, Celestia and Luna ask him to help them defeat Lucifer and the other Titans. He refuses saying that he no longer has alicorn magic. Which begs the question, why doesn’t Celestia just give him alicorn magic? We clearly see it done in the finale of Season 3 when she made Twilight an alicorn. Hell, we see it at the end of Season 4, when she gives Twilight her magic. So… why doesn’t Celestia do the same thing here?

Are there certain rules to giving away your magic? It only works when the plot tells you it does?

And Hephaestus worked for Lucifer, but now is not working for Lucifer? I think? And then he falls in love with Fluttershy and Rarity because they … rather easily the more I think about it … convince him to do the right thing?

"And we do believe in many things. Even it is the unbelievable..." said Rarity and she's stand up with Fluttershy and grab each of Hephasetus's hands. This makes Spike got a lot of jealous.

"Well then... if you really do care about Olympus. Will you help us to set Zeus, Hades and Poseidon free from Tartarus?" asked Fluttershy and both she and Rarity give him the sweet eyes.

"Oh my goodness! You two remind me to... Aphrodite. The beauty and behavior of you two... really much like her," said Hephaestus and he's stand up from his throne.

I think… I don’t know. Honestly, if you still care, you should hit yourself in the head with a hammer again.

So they go to the gates of Tartarus where I think it was built by Daedalus.

"As that you all see. No any mortal ponies can go into Tartarus. Unless of course, by using this labyrinth, " said Hephaestus and he's point to the labyrinth in the reproduce that is part of the Underworld.

Oh, good. Can we see a minotaur? I would kill for an assertiveness class on this fucking thing!

So, Lucifer explains that when gods die, they disappear and are gone forever. Which is actually bullshit because Discord was killed in the last story and he came back to life just fine. This is why resurrection kills any tension in stories!

But when her, her sister or us! Or even Discord! DIED! It's not the dead! It's called the

disappear!" said Lucifer and he's turn back on them.

"It's the perish! It's the perish!" said Lucifer.

"ZEEKAAA!" said Kronos.

Meanwhile in the Desert…

… Enough of that scene I guess… Starting to feel how poor the pacing is for this thing…

Our heroes find the gate to Tartarus and Hephaestus tells the Main Six, the Princesses and Discord to go through it. Mykan would be so happy to hear those words.

"This gate will send you all directly to Tartarus!" said Hephasetus and there is an explosion in the sky.

Suddenly, Tweedle Dee (Balius) and Tweedle Stupid (Xanthus) finally arrive and attack our heroes, with Celestia and Luna fighting them off. Yes, I’m sure they’d love to put their unicorns in Luna… Don’t take that out of context! They want to stick their horns in Luna’s body! … Don’t take that out of context either!

… What, I had to get my Luna sex jokes in there somewhere?

After a brief fight scene, they escape from the Tweedle’s and make their way into the depths of hell, where Luna starts to break down and cry.

"I can't do this! This is too much for me!" said Luna and she's began to cry.

"Shhh! Luna... you have nothing to worry. I won't let anything happen to you. I'm promise," said Celestia.

"You have to be strong Princess Luna! Don't let the hatred feeling of those Psycho Demigods got in you!" said Applejack

We love you, Princess Luna! We love you! … Seriously, that’s what the next 15 paragraphs are about. If you like Princess Luna, fine. But why make all the characters sing her praises like this for no reason? And why even have Luna break down like this when she’s never acted like this in anyway?!

They make their way through Tartarus, but unfortunately, they get lost.

"We're walking in here for 45 minutes now! I didn't see any way to out!" said Applejack.

"Patience Rainbow Dash," said Twilight.

I have no joke there… that’s just funny.

After about five minutes in the labyrinth, I’m sure Theseus wishes it was that easy, they find Zeus and the others. They start to free the gods, but are attacked by Beavis and Butthead.

"A cage can't stop us!" said Xanthius and he's landed on the ground with his brother very hard and run to stop them from free Zeus, Hades and Poseidon.

"We won't let you escape!" said Balius and he's pull out his club and make it on fire.

Oh, god! Now we’re adding incest to the mix! … Well, it wouldn’t be the strangest thing Greek Mythology ever produced…

The group manages to fight off Snips and Snails and free the gods, but they are unable to stop the Titans from breaking free.

"We don't have much time now!" said Discord and Balius and Xanthius throw the Royal Sisters away and run into stop them from escape but then Lucifer appear out from nowhere

and shoot fire from his Fire Sword to them. .

Oww… Oh, that run-on sentence… Da run-on sentence man…

So… for no particular reason whatsoever, Lucifer decides to help our heroes defeat Mario and Luigi. I’m serious. I have no idea what Lucifer is helping our heroes. He’s never given any reason behind it. He’s never said or done anything that could suggest he is having second thoughts, but apparently Lucifer is a good guy now. Don’t question it.

"Lucifer!" said Poseidon

"Come with us!" said Zeus

The Royal Sisters stand up and go support their father and uncles, and they both give Poseidon and Hades back their weapons.

Meanwhile at the Shrine…

Yes, that is the most we are ever given about why Lucifer switched sides. I seem to remember him trying to kill Zeus and the others gods in the last one! And throughout this one, he’s never given any evidence that he was feeling guilty! The only one who would have betrayed the villains was Tirek! And he already did that! Man, I’m sure Michael wished he knew how easily Lucifer could be shifted back to his side.

Lucifer: That's what desire IS. The need for what we can't have. The need for what's readily available is called greed.”

Michael: Hey, stop being a dick!

Lucifer: Oh… Okay…

With the Titans free from their prison, they begin their rampage across the land. Twilight and the others teleport to the Crystal Empire to prepare for battle. Zeus explains that in order to defeat the Titans, they need to create the Spear of Triam, a weapon forged by the merging of the gods weapons.

Knowing that one of them in possessed by Superman and Batman, Celestia and Luna go to confront them. They battle for a while, and the story constantly switches back and forth between three scenes, the battle against the Titans, Discord trying to convince the Gods to help defeat the Titans, and Celestia and Luna fighting Yugi and Joey. And it happens so fast, you barely have time to get settled into a scene of what is going on before the next scene comes up.

I realize it’s trying to go for the editing of the movie, but it doesn’t work here! It feels rushed and unfocused! Like the story couldn’t focus on a scene long enough to add some context to it before it got bored and moved to the next one.

So, like in the movie Wrath of the Titans where Hades gives Zeus his power back, Lucifer is apparently able to do the same thing to three gods. No wonder the gods feared Lucifer, he’s apparently more powerful than all three of them put together. Why doesn’t he kill the Titans if he such a good guy? Hell, why does he even need the Titans if he’s strong enough to kill the King of Olympus by himself? Whatever, the story is almost over.

So, Celestia and Luna eventually defeat the Blues Brothers through the power of friendship, I think and arrive just in time to kill the titans and save the day.

Our heroes celebrate by Death giving Luna a smack on her bump, breaking God knows how many laws of sexual assault, the gods get statues built in their honor even though they’ve proven how much they don’t deserve them, Lucifer is let back into heaven, where he’ll no doubt put a stick in God’s eye, Tirek is nowhere to be found, Pinkie Pie throws a party. and we discover that this was in fact a prequel to Equestrylvania…

"That is all from what did I heard." said Vampony Guard.

"What do you think my love?" asked Dracula and let his wife thinking about decision.

"Apollonia and Artemis shall be destroyed... in another day!" said Carmilla.

Granted the writing improved between stories…

This story sucks…

Not only is it an almost scene for scene copy past job of the Wrath of the Titans movie, which was not a good movie to begin with, it doesn’t fix any of the problems the movie had, and continues with those problems not being addressed.

The plot makes very little sense, if any at all, due to the poor writing. The fight scenes are boring as hell, the characters are barely characters, the plot is rushed and many of the elements of the story have no purpose to them.

Tirek was in the story, yeah. But what in the world was his point? The Pride of Ixion wasn’t much better, so why have these characters to begin with?

The main six barely do anything and they could have easily been cut from the story to make this about Celestia, Luna and Discord. There’s no reason for Lucifer to change sides and no point to having three titans, instead of just Chronos like in the movie.

A story that’s about as good as the movie it was based on. Which considering the source material, is not saying a lot.