Starlight did her best to hold back her laughter but kept failing miserably in her attempts to do so. “Hold on, hold on.” Starlight took a deep breath. “So, you’re trying to think up a pet name for your marefriend and the best you could come up with was ‘sweets’?”

Spike deadpanned. “Yes. Is there a problem with that? I’m assuming there is considering your inability to act like a civilized pony.”

Starlight waved a hoof at him. “No, no, there’s no problem. Just… you think that’s special and original?”

“Yes. Yes I do.” Spike angrily tapped his foot against Starlight’s bedroom floor. “I don’t think I’ve ever heard anypony use it before. Game, set, and match.”

“Whatever you say… sweets.” Starlight erupted into yet another laughter fit.

This had been going on since the moment Spike woke up and sought out Starlight to get her up to date on the goings on of his relationship. Deep down, he knew this was going to happen in his attempts to get advice, as it usually does. It was just a matter of weathering the storm until he reached the destination he was looking for, which was advice and a quick confidence boost.

She was usually good for at least one of those things.

“Okay, look, I like it,” Spike said, rolling his eyes at the mare curled up on the bed in front of him. “But I take it you have something better in mind since you’re so ready to dash my hopes and dreams?”

“Hmm,” Starlight rubbed her, propping her head up from her pillow to do so. “A good pet name has to take into account something about the pony it’s referring to.”

“I can agree with that,” Spike said. “And she’s really sweet.”

“Hush, I’m thinking.” Starlight racked her brain for a few more seconds. “Oh, I got it! She likes muffins and stuff, right?”

“Yeah, so? Everypony likes muffins.”

“How about you call her your ‘love-muffin’.” Starlight waggled her eyebrows at the dragon. “Ayy, pretty good, right?”

“I’m pretty sure I’d rather bathe in acid until my bones bleed than call her that,” Spike said. “Besides, do we look like we’re in our seventies?”

“Eh, you’re a dragon. Aging isn’t really an exact science with you guys.” Starlight shrugged. “You looked like a baby until you were like fifteen, after all.”

Spike chuckled and sat down at the foot of the bed. “Okay, fine, it’s not bad. But I didn’t come up with it, so it doesn’t feel genuine enough.”

“Okay, fine, be that way,” Starlight said, lightly pushing him with a hoof. “But I’m telling you, you should at least test the waters with it next time you see her. Just to see what happens.”

Spike groaned out loud and reciprocated her push with a slightly stronger shove. “Okay, fine, you win. But if it blows up in my face and I end up embarrassing myself, I’m blaming you.”

“Whatever. You don’t need my help to do that.”

Spike gave her a glare that could freeze a campfire.

“Alright, just do what you want, Spike.” She got up and moved a bit closer to Spike. “I take it you’re talking to me for something a bit more important than pet names. What’s up?”

Spike sighed and turned toward her. “Well, I’m seeing her tonight…”

Starlight cocked an eyebrow. “Tonight? That’s pretty quick considering you just saw her yesterday, but hey, more power to ya for—”

“...At her house. For a ‘surprise’.”

The mare blinked a few times before speaking up. “Oh, well, that’s a different story, then.”

“No joke,” Spike responded, flopping his back onto the bed. “This will be my first time going over there and I don’t have any idea of what to expect or even worse, what to do when the unexpected happens.”

She simply nodded in agreement. “This is quite the dilemma, Spike. Going to your marefriend’s house for the first time… That’s big. Really big. Like, what happens tonight, especially considering you’re at the most important stage of your relationship, it could change the entire course of your potential life together.”

Spike’s eyes were as wide as dinner plates. “Oh gosh. The pressure is real.” Spike shot up and looked at Starlight. “I don’t think I can handle it. I should cancel.” He was shut up by a quick smack to the face, courtesy of Starlight.

“Spike, keep your mouth shut and listen for a second, or I’ll break the house rules and use my magic to make you shut up.”

Spike rubbed his now red sore cheek. He knew when he needed help and this was one of those times.

“Here’s the deal,” Starlight began. She hopped off the bed and paced back and forth in front of him. “Is this an important event? Yes. What should you expect? I’m not entirely sure. What’s the surprise? We’ll get to that in a second. Obviously, Spike, there are a lot of unknowns going on here, but you’ve got a secret weapon on your side. You know what that weapon is?”

Spike scratched his head and thought for a moment. “Good looks and a high charisma modifier?”

“No!” She screeched out, pausing her pacing for a moment. “You’ve got me and my loads of wisdom and experience.”

In any normal conversation with Starlight, this would be the perfect opportunity for some well-timed snark. But now was not the time for such antics as Spike genuinely needed this mare’s help. It hurt his very heart and soul to admit that, but alas, some wars were not meant to be won alone.

“Alright, Starlight,” Spike said. “I’m listening. Let me have it.”

“Good.” Starlight resumed her pacing once more. “So, first things first, you’re approaching this with the wrong frame of mind. It’s important, but don’t think of it as important. You understand what I mean?”

Spike rose a claw in the air. “Umm…”

“I’ll take that as a no. Basically, treat it just like your seeing her again under normal circumstances. How you would act and prepare for just seeing her on a normal visit, that’s what this needs to be in your head, alright?”

“Normal visit, got it,” Spike said with a thumbs up. “But what about the stuff that might happen? Like, even if I pretend this a regular date, the setting is different and all kinds of stuff. What if I mess something up, say the wrong thing?”

“Hmm, there is a lot of room for error and you have been known for taking advantage of even the smallest crawl spaces in that room…”

“I can’t even argue with you there,” Spike said with a frown. “I’m doomed, aren’t I?”

“Do I need to smack you again?” she asked, hoof raised in anticipation of violence.

Spike immediately perked up. “No, I’m good.”

“Alright, so here’s the deal.” Starlight sat on the floor and made direct eye contact with Spike. “Some new stuff could happen. No wait, strike that. New stuff will happen. But that’s how relationships grow. If nothing new ever happened, things would get stagnant and boring, right?”

The dragon slowly nodded. “Yeah, I think I get it. So, I should look forward to the new stuff instead of being freaked out by it.”

“Precisely!” Starlight said, reaching out for a quick hoof bump. “You’re not hopeless after all. Who knew?”

Spike rolled his eyes. “Yeah, well, even that doesn’t help with probably the biggest thing happening tonight. The ‘surprise’.”

“That’s definitely a big variable in the equation,” Starlight said, rubbing her chin with even more purpose than before.

“Huh?”

“Sorry, I heard Twilight say that the other day when she found out her favorite hayburger now comes with tomato added to it.”

“Got it. Carry on.”

“Tell me, Spike.” Starlight gazed at him curiously. “In what context did she mention this ‘surprise’. What was the conversation about?”

“Let me think.” Spike scratched the back of his head. “We were just chatting about life and stuff and she asked if I could come over tonight. And then she just said she had a surprise for me when I got there.”

“I see,” she replied. “Was there any excessive eyelash fluttering or sensual hoof touching going on.”

“Not that I can think of,” Spike said. “She did bite her lip a bit when she asked if I could come to her house, though. I think. Maybe. Possibly. Perhaps?”

“Okay, I think I’ve got this,” Starlight said. “Spike, the answer is short, sweet and to the point.”

He was quite literally on the edge of his seat. “Yeah?”

“She simply has something she wants to show you. Simple as that.”

The dragon frowned and schooched back. “Oh, really? What drew you to that conclusion, genius?”

Starlight shrugged. “Well, what I’m saying is it’s nothing big. It’s probably just an old photo or a present or something. Honestly, it might have been more incentive for you to come over in the first place if she was afraid you’d say no.”

Spike cocked an eyebrow at her. “Really? Is that what you mares really think?”

“We’re complex creatures, Spike.” Starlight hopped up on the bed next to him. “But remember, because we’re complex, none of us are the same. So, I could be completely wrong… and you better never tell anypony I said that or I’ll make sure you never live it down.”

“No worries,” he replied. “But if you don’t know what it is, then that means I have to—”

“Be surprised.” Starlight lightly knocked him upside the head. “I mean, it’s probably something small, but for all you know she could be showing you a really cool family heirloom, or she might be showing you a nifty present she picked out at the general store. But the principle remains the same. Make sure to be yourself, be genuine and be confident, or she’ll be showing you the way to the front door.”

Spike released a deep, breathy sigh. “Alright… I think I could do that. But why do you think so?”

“Think what?”

“You know, that I can handle it? Not just now, but tomorrow and next week and so on?”

“Spike,” she said. “You’re a great guy and if she’s been with you for a month then I guarantee she thinks so, too. I’ll even admit that it’s cute how much you care about her and how she sees you. But you gotta relax. I believe in you, she believes you, so you just gotta believe in yourself now, alright? Because it doesn’t matter how much I think you’ll succeed. You have to believe so, too.”

Spike smiled at her and wrapped her up in a tight hug. No matter how much flak they gave each other on a daily basis, they always had each other’s backs. He needed her today, and she delivered.

“Thanks. I owe you one.” He hopped off the bed and wandered over to the door. “If you ever manage to find a pony that can tolerate you for more than a few minutes, I’ll be here.”

His snide comment was followed up by a book being tossed and connecting with his face.

“Get out of here and go shower or something,” Starlight shouted as he walked out the door. “You need to be yourself, but yourself needs to smell good.”

He gave her one last thumbs up before shutting the door behind him.

As he walked down the hall, he kept replaying the key points of their conversation in his mind. Ordinary date, believe in yourself, be genuine. It seemed so simple, yet so complex at the same time. This wasn’t an ordinary date. The chips were on the table. He and Derpy were going to be alone… in an enclosed space… a space that belonged to her!

This was uncharted territory.

But Starlight was definitely right about one thing: dwelling about the situation for the rest of the day would do little but make him sick. He immediately shook off the thoughts and headed toward the shower to fix himself up. The afternoon was quickly approaching and he needed to be ready.

Ready for whatever was in store.

It was a warm evening. It wasn’t hot enough to be uncomfortable, but it wasn’t cool enough to be pleasant. As he winded through the brick pathways of Ponyville, he couldn’t help but think of the weather being the perfect backdrop for how he was feeling.

He wasn’t quite confident enough to feel completely relaxed, but he wasn’t so nervous that he had to fight with himself every step to keep from running home. It wasn’t perfect, but it was ideal.

He at least thought of one thing on his own for the occasion. He had picked up a small bouquet of flowers to bring Derpy. They were nothing special, but they were yellow ones, just like the one he put in her mane back when they were first hanging out. He thought it might lessen the tension if he started things out with a nice gesture.

He finally arrived at her doorstep a short time later. It was a few minutes early, but he’d rather be early than late. He wasn’t a dating expert, but showing up for important dates late definitely didn’t seem like a good move.

He clutched the flowers in one claw and gently knocked a few times on the door with the other. He took a moment to look at her place while awaiting a response.

It was nothing special, just a one-story home made out of stone. It had a wooden porch area and small patch of grass that qualified as her yard. It was near the town center, but not close enough to be bothered by the hustle and bustle.

All in all, it was a very nice, humble home.

His admiration screeched to a grinding halt however as he heard some movement coming from behind the door. The handle began to jiggle before it twisted around and the door swung open.

Derpy was standing in the doorway, her mane a bit frazzled and a slight redness on her cheeks. “S-Sorry that took so long, Spike. I was in the other room.”

Spike smiled at her. “Oh, no worries. I was just getting a look at your home from the outside. It’s really nice.”

“Really?” she asked, brushing her mane out of her face. “It’s kinda simple and small. Nothing like the castle.”

“Eh,” Spike said, waving a claw. “Space is overrated.”

They shared a chuckle for a brief second before Spike noticed Derpy’s eyes drawn to the flowers in his claw.

“Oh! I almost forgot.” Spike held out the bouquet to her. “I, um, I got these for you. I saw them on the way over and they were pretty and stuff, so you know, I thought you should have them.”

If her face wasn’t red before, it was making up for it in spades now. She gently reached out a hoof and took the flowers from him. “They’re beautiful. Thank you so much, Spike.”

He rubbed the back of head. “Oh, well, it’s just a small thing and… I guess I’m kinda bad at this whole gentlecolt thing. Flowers are kinda generic I know, but—”

His sentence was cut off by Depry fluttering over to him and planting a kiss on his lips. It was a short one, but boy did the point come across to him.

“You’re welcome,” he said, a goofy grin taking over his face.

Derpy smiled at him, a moment of silence hanging in the air soon after. She finally snapped back to attention however and broke it. “Do you wanna come inside?”

“Huh? Oh, yeah. That’s what I’m here for and everything.” He’d have to schedule a good old-fashioned facepalm later for that awkward showing.

Spike walked in the doorway and got a good look around her living room as he did so. It was small and very cozy. There was a single loveseat against the back wall with a short coffee table in front of it. The floors were wooden with the exception of a small rug underneath the table. The space was dressed with a few pictures clinging to the walls. A small bookcase stood in one of the corners, slightly filled with a few books and decorated with some ornaments.

“This is awesome,” Spike said, turning around to meet her eyes. “It’s so cozy. I like it.”

“Thanks,” she said with her own awkward smile.”You wanna have a seat?” She pointed toward the loveseat and Spike gladly did her bidding.

It was a pretty comfortable arrangement. He could get used to it. He wondered what the rest of the house looked like, but he wasn’t about to ask for a personal tour. He got in the door and that was more than what he expected of himself tonight. No need to get greedy.

Derpy smiled at him for where she was standing near the door. “I’m really glad you like it. So, if you remember, I told you I had a surprise for you, right?”

“Yeah,” Spike squeaked out. He was not anticipating the unknown rearing its ugly head so quickly. But, as Starlight said, he had to be ready to roll with it. He cleared his throat and spoke again. “I remember. I’m excited to see it. Whatever it is.”

“Good.” Derpy said. “So, just like when you showed me that rooftop in Manehattan, I need you to close your eyes, okay?”

Spike gulped. “Okay.” He closed his eyes as tightly as he could. “They’re closed.”

“Alright,” she said. “Don’t open them until I say so, okay? I’ll be right back.”

“Got it.”

Spike thought about cracking one eye just to get a bearing on everything, but he did make a promise and he really didn’t want to start this night by breaking one. It just seemed like bad mojo.

He heard a door at the other side of the home open and shut rapidly, followed by a pair of hooves scurrying back toward him. That was soon followed by the loveseat bouncing next to him, as if a pony just sat down beside him. Oh gosh, if this surprise ended up being some kind of cuddling thing, he’d probably have a heart attack.

“Alright,” Derpy’s voice called out… not from right next to him. “You can open them.”

He shot his eyes open and was immediately met with a—

“Surprise!”

He was immediately tackled back into the cushions by a bouncing filly, grin wider than the ocean.

“Dinky?” Spike couldn’t believe it. “You’re home!”

Author's Notes:

How about that for a plot twist?

Thanks to my editor, Curify, for making it not suck.