Equestria's Finest: The Greatest tales ever told
Chapter 1: Twilight's Bad Night
One day in the land of Ponyville, the peaceful town was sleeping in harmonic slumber. Everypony was dreaming; some good dreams and others nightmares. It was all peaceful in Ponyville, as they were all in slumber, except for one little Unicorn.
Twilight Sparkle couldn't sleep. Every time when she laid on her back and closed her eyes, nothing happened. Because of that, she was looking at the wall of the library, wishing that she can go to sleep. Slowly and slowly her eyed obeyed to her wishes and began to close.
Then, out of FUCKING NOWHERE, Rainbow Dash dives through the tree window, smashing it into shards and pieces. Twilight was flabbergasted at her friend's random coming. Rainbow Dash, on the other hand, got KNOCKED THE FUCK OUT and went to sleep. 'Lucky Bitch', Twilight thought, picking up her friends unconscious body which seemed to have to injuries on her. She plopped her on the bed and waited silently for her 'guest' to wake up. It wasn't long until Rainbow Dash finally opened her eyes.
“RAINBOW DASH,” Twilight yelled at her friend who was now regaining consciousness, “WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT FOR?”
Rainbow Dash, still in a daze, looked back at Twilight. “Wait. What..?” She replied back, putting a hoof onto her head. Twilight was now enraged with anger due to her friend's ignorance at what the FUCK she just did to her house. Not ever Magic can fix the shattered remains of the window. Money was to spent to pay for that window, and it won't be cheap.
After a few moments of awkward as shit silence, Twilight broke the silence, her voice now more calm than before. “Rainbow Dash?,” She asked her friend who was now beginning to regain her balance as she stood up on all fours.
“What?”
“Can you tell me why the FUCK you would COME OVER IN THE MIDDLE OF THE FUCKING NIGHT WHEN EVERYPONY’S SLEEPING?...”
Rainbow Dash was about to answer but Twilight stopped her in her tracks, “ALSO, WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU GO THROUGH THE WINDOW? IT. WAS. UNLOCKED. YOU DIDN’T HAVE TO MAKE A SCENE BY BREAKING MY SHIT!” Twilight was now beginning to turn bat-shit crazy until Rainbow Dash finally replied.
“I came here because I wanted to give you a present, but I forgot to give you it before. I just remembered so I had to come here and give it to you!” Twilight was now finally calming down, turning her excess rage into delightful glee.
“Oh boy! What is it?” She asked excitedly to Dash. After a few happy moments and awkward apologies Rainbow lifted a gift to Twilight. It was crudely packaged, as if it was wrapped and bought in a hurry, but she didn’t care. It was a gift from one of her best friends, so there was nothing to be angry about!
She was ripping off the wrapper from her present until she finally grasped onto the now opened gift with her hooves. She picked it up, now stareing in blind confusion of the present her friend bought her. It was a book, titled Window-Cleaners book for Eggheads by Wip E. Alliday.
Twilight looked back to her friend, who was now grinning happily at her demise. "You mad, Twi?" She said back to her, giving a grin of accomplishment. Twilight, on the other hand, couldn't associate what the fuck just happened. Twilight couldn’t bear no more of this embarrassment from her trolling friend.
TWILIGHT SHOVED HER HORN INTO DASH’S THROAT, SLICED HER BODY CLEAN INTO SHREDS WITH BOTH HER MAGIC AND HORN, AND USED THE WINDOW CLEANER BOOK RAINBOW DASH GAVE TO HER TO WIPE OFF RAINBOW DASH’S BLOOD FROM THE FLOOR AND HER BODY. AFTER THIS INCIDENT, TWILIGHT HAD THE GREATEST SLEEP SHE COULD HAVE EVER HAD IN THE HISTORY OF ALL EQUESTRIA.
THE END