Bells rang out across the city as Swift grabbed the bag of bits from the bank teller, waving his crossbow in the frightened pony’s face.

“I TOLD YOU NOT TO HIT THE ALARM, BITCH!” He roared, slamming a hoof on the counter. “YOU REALISE WHAT YOU’VE JUST DONE?”

His ears perked as he heard the unmistakable clanking sound of approaching guards. There was no way he’d be able to take all of them on with just a crossbow. That left him one option: run.

Swift whirled around on the spot, retracting his crossbow and stuffing it into his saddlebag as he galloped for his life. Bursting out of the back doors, the terrified batpony burglar spread his wings and launched himself into the air. There weren’t many ponies that could catch him once he got into the air.

Strangely enough, however, one of them was definitely trying, a unicorn of all things. He clambered up onto the rooftops, his horn lighting up with bright blue magic as he charged up a spell.

What the fuck…?

The unicorn fired off the spell, sending an orb of bright blue magic straight at Swift. Diving away to avoid it, the batpony tried to disappear into the winding streets of the city centre. However, as Swift looked around, he let out a tiny little chittering squeak. The spell followed him, arcing after him and gaining quickly. Swift beat his leathery wings as fast as he could, trying desperately to outrun the homing ball of magic, but it was no use. The spell caught up with him, binding his wings together and sending the little burglar tumbling head over hooves into an alley. His legs cracked underneath him as he struck the pavement, collapsing in a heap and skidding into a brick wall at the end of the alleyway.

“Fu...fuck!” He whimpered, trying to get to his hooves and scramble away, but it was no use. His legs lay shattered and useless underneath him, his wings torn and paralysed by magic. He struggled to shuffle away, towards a shady place where nopony could see him, but the sound of clanking filled his ears again. The guards were on their way.

Before the injured batpony could even get halfway behind the dustbins, the same unicorn appeared at the alley opening. He stood taller than most other ponies, his build muscular and massive to take advantage of his frame. As he pulled off his helmet to get a better look at the pony, his blond mane fell down around his shoulders. Swift recoiled as he stared into a pair of merciless blue eyes, glaring back at him sternly.

“Do you want to explain to me why you’ve committed this crime?” The guard growled, trotting forward almost casually. His gold armour clanked slightly as he walked, covering his vitals and his white coat beneath.

“No...money…” Swift gasped, pulling himself onto his side and looking up at the officer. “Wasn’t…my...fault…”

The stallion cocked his head. “Wasn’t your fault? You committed a crime, little batpony. You don’t just go around robbing banks because you need money.”

“But I…”

“There’s no excuse for it, batpony.” The unicorn shook his head blankly, pulling a knife out of his saddlebag and casting it onto the ground in front of the burglar.

“Wha...what are you…?” Swift whispered, scrabbling towards the knife and inspecting it.

The unicorn took no notice, drawing his sword and smacking the flat of the blade against the dustbins. The cacophony echoed around the alley and the surrounding streets, sounding for all the world like the clashing of two weapons. Before Swift could work out what he was up to, the stallion brought the weapon down on his head in a great overarm swing, driving the blade deep into his chest and piercing his heart.

The batpony’s eyes widened before finally closing, his limp body collapsing in a torn heap on the cobblestones.

“Lieutenant!” Came a shout from nearby. The stallion whirled on the spot, pulling his sword out of the burglar and cleaning the blade by magic as his commanding officer arrived on the scene.

“Captain Titus.” He said respectfully, sheathing his sword and standing at attention.

“Stronghooves.” The Captain nodded briskly, his eyes drifting over to the dead batpony in the corner of the alley. “What happened here? I heard a great deal of noise.”

“He tried to resist arrest, sir.” Stronghooves shrugged. “He was armed. I had to put him down.”

“Indeed.” Titus sighed. “What an unfortunate waste of life. What about the money from the bank?”

“It’s safe, sir.” Stronghooves nodded, levitating the bag of money out of the batpony’s saddlebags by magic. “He didn’t get to a dead drop. I made sure of that.”

“Excellent work, Lieutenant.” Titus smiled, patting the stallion on the back. “You’ll make Captain someday, just you wait.”

“Thank you sir. I’m just happy to rid the city of another criminal. It’s a shame he couldn’t be rehabilitated.” Stronghooves sighed mournfully.

“Well, some ponies simply can’t, Lieutenant. Don’t let it get to you.” Titus smiled softly, placing a hoof on Stronghooves’s shoulder. “I understand that it’s hard taking a life, but it’s an unfortunate necessity sometimes.”

“Yeah, I...I know…” Stronghooves hung his head, ears splaying back.

“Tell you what, how about you take the rest of the day off? Head to the marketplace and spend some time recuperating.” Titus’s horn flared, a few wads of cash levitating out of the bag and into Stronghooves’s saddlebags. “And perhaps take a little something for yourself, off the books.”

“Sir?” Stronghooves looked back at his saddlebags uneasily. “I...no, sir. I couldn’t…”

“Look, consider it compensation for the effort you had to put into taking this scumbag down.” Titus held up a hoof, grinning. “You’ve earned it.”

Stronghooves looked up at the Captain of the Royal Guard, frowning as Titus smiled hopefully back at him, almost as if he were pleading him to not go to the Princesses about this.

“Thank you, sir.” Stronghooves said resignedly, trotting away. Only once he was clear of the captain did he gallop away, off towards the marketplace.

After all, he had an investigation to complete.

“NOOOOOOOOOO!” Accident screamed.

“Kid, just accept it! It’s happening!” Sky bellowed back.

“I’M TOO YOUNG TO DIE!”

“YOU’RE NOT GOING TO DIE! JUST...STOP FIDGETING, DAMN IT!”

Accident froze in place. She stopped squirming in Sky’s grip to look at her with wide disbelieving eyes. “You...you swore.” She gasped. “You’re gonna be in so much trouble when your mum finds out about this!”

“Yeah, well she’s not gonna.” Sky stuck her tongue out, placing the filly in her saddlebag and continuing to trot up the stairs. “So I can swear all I like!”

“Well…” Accident blustered. “You...you’ll be in trouble with me, then! Your punishment is to not give anypony a bath tonight, you hear me?”

“Nice try, but you’ve got cookie crumbs all over you.” Sky chuckled. “You’re totally getting a bath and that’s final!”

“But...but you can’t do that, Miss Sky!” Accident shook her head, poking her muzzle out from under Sky’s saddlebag flap. “I’ve got so much left to live for! Please don’t drown me! I don’t wanna die!”

“You’re not gonna die!” Sky rolled her eyes in exasperation. “You’ll get wet and then you’ll get clean. That’s all that’s gonna happen, okay?”

“But...what if I drown?” Accident asked, quivering in fright. “My wings are so heavy! I’ll sink right to the bottom!”

“You won’t drown. The bathtub’s smaller than you are with those huge wings.” Sky giggled, stepping into the bathroom.

“But I’ll be soggy and wet! I don’t give very good pony cuddles when I’m all wet!” Accident begged. “You’re robbing me of my cuddling power! How could you do this to me?”

“Easy!” Sky frowned, running the tap and beginning to fill up the bath. Her mind raced as she tried to find a way to shut that little pony up.

“Sky...I thought we were friends?” Accident pouted, poking a little forehoof out of the saddlebag and placing it against Sky’s shoulder. “Friends don’t put friends in the bath!”

“They do too!” Sky frowned, lifting Accident out of her saddlebag by the scruff of the neck and holding her over the water. The filly flapped her wings, galloping in midair for all the good it’d do her, but it was too late. Sky placed her carefully in the tub.

“OH NO! DON’T DO...COLD! COOOOOLD!” Accident yelped, her soft hooves squeaking against the edge of the bathtub as she desperately tried to escape.”

Sky dipped a hoof into the water to test the temperature. “Liar.” She grinned.

“Oh...um...HELP! I’M ALLERGIC TO WATER! I’M MELTING! MEEEEELTIIIIING!” Accident wailed, putting her muzzle under the water and blowing bubbles for dramatic effect. Her wings grew heavy as anvils as they became waterlogged, her tail doing the same. She peeked up at Sky with a look of utter misery, silently questioning how one little pony could be so incredibly mean.

“You’re not melting.” Sky rolled her eyes, before suddenly getting an idea. ”But...you’d better stop thrashing around or the Bathtime Sharks will get you!”

Accident raised her head, one of her ears flopping down as she tilted it. “Bathtime Sharks?”

“Yeah.” Sky nodded gravely, sitting down and raising her forehooves dramatically. “The Bathtime Sharks are super-duper-scary, and they actually live in the pipes under the tub! Don’t tell me you’ve never heard of them!”

Accident shook her head, eyes wide as dinner plates. Her misery forgotten, she watched Sky with rapt attention.

“Wow, you don’t?” Sky whistled, waving her hoof. “Oh boy, no wonder you were so noisy!”

“What do they do, Miss Sky?” Accident asked. This was a matter of incredible importance, and she wasn’t about to let Sky dance around the issue. Not when she’s already in the tub like this!

“Well, they travel around the pipes underneath bathtubs, listening carefully…” Sky said slowly, putting a hoof up to her ear. “And when they hear a filly squealing about having to take a bath, they come out of the plughole and gobble them up!”

Accident clapped her hooves to her mouth, shaking her head in sheer terror. “Eep! No! Are the Bathtime Sharks gonna get me?”

“I’m afraid they might.” Sky sighed mournfully, putting her hoof to her forehead dramatically. “You really should have listened to me about being so noisy!”

“No! Sky, you’ve gotta save me!” Accident squeaked, reaching out over the rim of the bath for Sky to pull her out. “Please, I’ll do anything!”

“Well, if only there was something I could do…” Sky splayed her ears back, drooping her wings and tail as she went through her bathroom cabinet. “I mean, if you’re super quiet, you might just...hello, what have we here…?”

“What, what?” Accident squeaked.

“Kid, you might just make it!” Sky smiled, perking her ears as she triumphantly held up a little rubber duck and a bottle.

“Wh...what’re those?”

“Well, this here is magical bubble bath to protect you from the sharks. The bubbles get in your eyes, you see, and the sharks don’t like that.” Sky nodded. “And this...this is a magical little rubber duck to scare them off! He’s a really tough duck, tough enough to beat up those mean old sharks so they go back into the pipes and don’t try to eat you!”

Accident gasped, reaching out for them like a lost desert traveller being offered water. “Please, Miss Sky! I need the duck and the magical bubble bath! Please don’t let the Bathtime Sharks eat me! I don’t wanna be eaten!”

“That depends…” Sky frowned. “Are you gonna complain about taking a bath again?”

“No! Never!”

“Well then…” Sky snickered, holding out the bottle and the duck with a cheeky little smile on her face. Accident snatched them out of her hooves, cuddling the duck as she emptied a good half of the bubble bath into the water. She began to flap her wings, watching as great big concealing patches of bubbly safety formed around her.

“Thank you, Miss Sky. You really saved me!” Accident giggled. “Twice!”

“Don’t mention it, kid.” Sky winked. “Hey, let’s make sure you get all nice and cleaned up, okay? The sooner we get this done, the sooner you’ll be totally safe from the sharks.”

Accident nodded, and Sky stepped forward with a little scrubbing brush. Taking it in hoof, the older mare started to scrub the filly’s back, covering her in a big bubbly lather. “So tell me about your mum. You seem pretty excited to go back to her.”

“Yahuh.” Accident nodded. “My mum’s the best mum around! She’s super-clever and super-pretty and she loves me more than anything else in the world!”

“She is, huh?” Sky asked casually. “Prettier than me?”

“Uh…” Accident paused, falling silent. “She...she’s...pretty beautiful...and taught me how to do my mane!”

“Well you’re gonna have to show me sometime!” Sky smiled.

“She always calls me her pretty little Accident and cuddles me when she comes to visit.” Accident grinned. “She takes great care of me and seeing her is the most exciting thing ever! I love Visiting Day!”

“She...visits you?” Sky asked, cocking her head. “That’s a new one. Where do you normally live.”

“I’ve got my own room in the attic at dad’s place!” Accident replied with a little squee, kicking her back leg as Sky started to scrub the base of her wings. “I...eeeee...I get to sleep there and read books and everything as long as I don’t make too much noise!”

Sky stopped, her ears splaying back. “Er...oh…” She said quietly. “Well, you know what? I think you’re pretty and sweet all the time, for what it’s worth.”

“Thank you, Miss Sky!” Accident giggled, scooping up a hoof-full of bubbles and sticking them to her host’s nose. “You’re really sweet and pretty too, well, except for the moustache!”

Sky crossed her eyes, peering down at the little bubble moustache she’d sprouted. “Oh no, don’t tell me you did that!” She giggled. “Bub...bubbles make me...aaa….AAAA...CHOO!”

With that, she grabbed a great big armful of bubbles, spreading them all over Accident’s face with a great big smile.

“Nooo! I can’t have a beard, Miss Sky! I’m a filly!” Accident snickered, flapping one of her huge waterlogged wings and spraying Sky with water.

“Oh no! I’m so sorry! That was an accident! I didn’t mean to…” Accident began, but Sky drove both of her hooves under the water, splashing the filly and sending her scampering to the other side of the tub.

“How do you like it?” Sky smiled, resting her head on her crossed forehooves and smiling triumphantly.

The filly snuffled and sniffed, trying to get the water out of her nose and wiping her face clean of bubbles. “Ugh...you’re a big meanie!”

“Yeah...but I’m the nicest big meanie you’ve ever met, sweetie. I’ll bet you money.” Sky winked, pulling the youngster out of the bath and setting her down on a towel. Accident shook herself, spraying droplets of water all over the bathroom and soaking Sky completely. The mare glared at her, beating her wings and blasting Accident with air. The tiny little pony gritted her teeth as she spread her own enormous wings, giggling as she struggled to stay in place as she dried off.

“I...LOOOOOVE...YOOOOOOU...SKYYYYYY!” She shouted over the sound of the elder pony’s wing-beats.

Sky blushed, smiling as she scooped up the extra-fluffy dry filly in her forehooves. “You’re not bad yourself, kid. Hey, one more sleep until you go back to see your mum! I bet you’re pretty excited, huh?”

“Super-excited!” Accident smiled, crawling onto Sky’s back and settling down as the mare carried her back to her bedroom. “She’ll have been so worried about me! It’ll be nice to see her again.”

“I bet it will.” Sky beamed, placing the young pony in her bed and tucking her in. “You’ve been on a pretty big adventure. Don’t worry, we’ll pick up a nice present for her before we meet up with her again, okay?”

“Okay.” Accident closed her eyes, extra-fluffy after being blow-dried. “Sky?”

“Yeah?”

“Do you think mum’s as excited to see me as I am to see her?”

Sky froze, biting her lip and looking at her hooves. “Um...she’s...er…”

“Sky?” Accident asked, cracking one eye open and staring at her. She gazed up at her with concern, needing to hear a big, resounding yes.

“She’s gonna have one hell of a shock.” Sky finished pathetically, running a hoof through Accident’s mane.

The filly settled back, closing her eyes and wriggling further under the covers. “You know, if I narrow my eyes and look at you real closely, you look just like my mummy.” She whispered sleepily.

“I do, huh?” Sky cocked her head. “What’s your mum like, anyway?”

“She’s…” Accident stopped to give a little squeaky yawn before continuing. “She looks just like you, only she’s...she’s a unicorn...and...she’s got golden horseshoes for a cutie mark...not like the black ones you’ve got..and...and…”

“Kid?” Sky whispered, prodding the young pony.

It was no good. Accident had already drifted off to sleep, snoring quietly and swaddled in warm, dry sheets.

Sky sighed, cocking her head and watching over the filly until she was certain that she was well and truly asleep. She picked up Scruffy, looking the gnarled little plushie over before squeezing him into Accident’s unresisting hooves.

“Well...that should be enough to go on…” She muttered under her breath, giving Accident one last kiss on the forehead before stepping out of the room.

As she left to search for Accident’s mother, Sky didn’t notice the filly’s eye crack open again, just a little.