Pinkie Pie woke the next day in a bleak mood. She wasn’t in the condition for any sort of activities. Even though it was her day off at Sugarcube Corner, she simply didn’t have enough energy to go out. The memories of her old days overwhelmed all of her other feelings, replacing them with a deep feeling of sorrow. What Pinkie needed was some alone time, some time to think.

As the day grew older, Pinkie decided that there was something she simply had to do. It wasn‘t the most appealing of prospects, but she felt that it was a necessary action to take. If she didn’t face the source of her anxiety, it would only continue to grow, and would eventually consume her. Pinkie took a deep breath, got out of bed and headed towards the dusty staircase leading to the attic.

Once there, she had no trouble locating the battered crate that contained the things that had left a permanent scar in her happiness. They weren’t the sort of grotesque things like monsters or disturbing pictures, though. Pinkie brought the box down to her room and, ignoring her apprehension, opened up the cardboard flaps that hid the inner contents. The only objects inside the box were a battered diary, a cube-shaped item covered by a cloth, and a long, thin object that was likewise covered. Pinkie flinched at the sight of these, not because of their outward appearance, but because she knew what each of the items really were beneath their disguises. However, Pinkie was only interested in the diary at the moment. She removed the book and resealed the box, storing the container in her dresser. Hopefully, though, she wouldn’t have to visit the box again and reveal what really lied within.

Sitting back down on her bed, Pinkie opened up the diary to the first page…

March 14, year 1204

Worked in the rock farm like usual. It’s boring but it needs to be done. I did see a pretty bird fly by, though. It had bright blue feathers and a shiny yellow beak…

No, this wasn’t what Pinkie was looking for. She was looking for a specific section. After flipping through a bunch of pages, the pink pony found what she was searching for. She began reading, biting her lip as the memories came back to her…

April 7, year 1204

I can’t take it anymore. Every time I see a rock I want to scream. Every time I see my father I want to lock myself in my room. I just can’t take it. I need to find a way to escape  all of this. I need a new life, one without all this work and pain. I barely even know what being happy feels like. But… how? I can’t run away, since the first time I tried that, it led to the most painful event of my life, and there aren’t any other ponies aside from my family for miles around. Oh, this is terrible. I hate my life and I can’t do anything about it. What am I going to do…?

Pinkie felt a wave of sadness wash over her. This was where it all began. This entry marked the start of her childhood depression. Her childhood had taken a vicious turn for the worst at this point.

Flipping to the next page, Pinkie began reading the next passage…  

April 10, year 1204

It’s been three days since my last entry. The reason for that is really strange and unexpected. That’s ‘cause I broke my leg three days ago. It happened when I tried to move a rock that was too heavy for me. While I was pushing it, my strength faltered and it fell back onto me, hitting me in my left foreleg. I heard a nasty crack and knew that the bone was broken. No one in my family had suffered an injury like this before, so the only thing that my parents could do was to take me to the hospital. So, we spent the next few hours carting me to Manehatten on an old dusty wagon. Once we got there, the town hospital quickly accepted me and the doctors got me well on my way to recovery.

But that’s not the important part of this. When I was in the hospital, I was kept next to an old, black-colored stallion with a cutie mark of a knife piercing a skull. Like that wasn’t disturbing or anything. It got creepier, though. The pony talked to me sometimes. At first, he talked about random morbid things like death, war, and starvation… things that I didn’t even know existed outside of my little rock farm. He rambled on throughout my stay, but on my last day in the hospital he told me something different. Somehow, the stallion knew about my depression that I’ve been having and he told me so. Then, to my immediate interest, he said that he had a way to help me out of it. I remember his exact words:

“I know of your sadness, little filly. I’ve seen it before in many other ponies, and I’ve helped them get rid of it. I can help you, too.”

I asked how. He answered by giving me a sinister-looking book. “This book has a number of ways to end your depression. Pick one that suits your tastes. They all work equally well.”

I opened the book, and immediately something fell out of it. I picked the object up from my bed, which turned out to be a knife. I was shocked and asked why it was in the book. “Ah, that’s part of the procedure. You’ll need it.” I nodded, uncomfortable and a little scared, and slipped the blade back into the book. I began to read it, but the stranger told me to stop right away. “Hey. Don’t read that here. The doctor’s don’t like that kind of stuff. They’ll take it away from you for sure. Read it when you get back home. Do it alone, too. This book is meant for you and you only.” I obediently put the book away, wondering what kind of stuff could possibly be written in it.  

A few hours later, I was released and my family and I headed home. I was able to limp on my bad leg and could support myself with the other thee.

Now that I’m home, I’m writing these events down before anything else, in case I forget them later. I guess that since I’m done recording, I can start reading that book. I’m kinda curious about it.

Pinkie blinked a tear out of her eye. This entry, while revealing little about the development of her sadness, told of one of the key elements of her childhood anguish. Though the memories were painful for her, Pinkie needed to continue reading. If she finished the diary, it would hopefully relieve her of her stress, and she could put out those memories once and for all. Flipping the page to the next entry…

“Oh Pinkie!” a sing-song voice suddenly called from the lower level of the house. That voice belonged to Mrs. Cake. “Are you awake, dear?”

Pinkie lowered her diary and looked in the direction of the voice. “I’m awake, Mrs. Cake! Do you need anything?”

“Actually, I do. I have a rather large order of cupcakes to bake, and I could really use a helping hand. Would you be willing to help me?”

Pinkie responded to confirm that she would help, and put down her diary to go downstairs. The mare was fine with helping with the baking. If all went well, she would have plenty of time to read the rest of her diary later.

Well, as it turned out, the work lasted much longer than expected. The first batch of cupcakes didn’t have enough sugar in them, which rendered the finished treats rather bland. That wasn’t really a problem, though. There was still plenty of time to finish the order by dusk. The pony duo got to work on the second batch. But, by a twist of fate, as this batch was being removed from the oven, a whimsical Pound Cake soared past his mother, startling her and causing her to drop the baked goods. “Ach! That little rascal! He couldn‘t have escaped from his crib at a worse time, either!” Mrs. Cake retrieved her baby and placed him back into the enclosed bed. Scowling, she returned to attempt a third batch… though she was hardly in the mindset to try again.

Fortunately, the third batch went without any mishaps, and the cupcakes were frosted and decorated, fulfilling the requested order. As it turned out, the mare that had placed the order - the schoolteacher Cheerilee - arrived at the shop minutes after the treats were finished. “We’re taking a field trip in class tomorrow, and these cupcakes would make the perfect picnic snack,” she explained. After paying and leaving, the two bakers finally got their well-deserved reprieve from the culinary mayhem. They wouldn’t have been able to continue, anyhow, since nighttime was already encroaching.

Mrs. Cake stifled a yawn. “Well, Pinkie, I think I’ll hit the sack. Thank you so much for helping me. Even without those… setbacks,” - the baker’s eye twitched slightly at that point - “I doubt that I’d have been able to finish those cupcakes without you. You know what? Since today was supposed to be your day off, you can have the next two days  to yourself. You deserve a reward for your generosity.”

“Hey, thanks, Mrs. Cake! It wasn’t a problem at all. I’m always willing to help. That’s what friends are for, right?”

“Indeed it is. Anyway, it’s time to get some sleep. All of this work and stress has taken a toll on me. You should get some sleep too, Pinkie. If your hair is any way to gauge your energy, then you’re getting pretty fatigued too. Good night!”

“Night Mrs. Cake!” Pinkie replied as she moved her eyes upward to check her hair. It was, indeed, only half as frizzy as it normally was. She sighed, finding another sign of her dwindling happiness. Mrs. Cake might not have known about Pinkie’s hair phenomenon, but the pink mare surely did, and it wasn’t anything that a good night’s sleep would readily fix.  

Ascending to her bedroom, Pinkie crashed on her bed, ready for a rest. It wasn’t long after that she had fallen asleep. The setting sun was just visible in Pinkie’s window, illuminating an open and unread diary on the pony’s desk.

Pinkie woke up to a loud knocking on her window. She looked outside to see Rainbow Dash rapping on the glass. “Pinkie! What are you doing in bed at two in the afternoon?” The pink pony stirred and looked at her clock. It was indeed the middle of the afternoon. Had she really slept for that long? She was usually awake in the early morning, before anyone else save for the few other early birds. It was impossible for her to sleep for more than a couple of hours with her overflow of energy. But, with the goings-on of the past few days, her energy clearly wasn’t at its peak.

“Uhmm… yeah, I guess I slept in a bit.”  

“A bit! Like that’s not an understatement at all. What’s been up with you? You never even came out of the house yesterday! And trust me when I say that you always leave the house for some crazy party or event!”

“Uh, don‘t worry about me, Dashie. I, uh, just didn’t feel like partying yesterday. You know, ‘cause I guess with all my crazy partying I got a little worn out.”

Rainbow Dash let out a disbelieving laugh. “YOU getting worn out? Gimme a break! Soon we’re gunna have Twilight becoming a rock star and Fluttershy joining the Wonderbolts!”

“Um, I’m not that slow of a flyer, you know.” As if on cue, the aforementioned pegasus appeared next to Dash in the window.  

“What? Oh, I didn’t mean it that way, Fluttershy. You’re a good flyer and all, but you’re not getting anywhere near the speeds of those great ponies.” Rainbow Dash got a little dreamy-eyed at the mention of her favorite flying team.  

“It’s okay. I’m not offended. Hello, Pinkie, by the way. We were getting worried about you, not showing up in town yesterday. Did you have a bad day?”

Pinkie got out of bed and yawned while she stretched her legs. “No, I’m fine. I was just tired.”

“Tired? But you’re never tired! If anypony has the energy for a party, it’s you…”

“Hey, we just discussed this!” Rainbow Dash said with an agitated voice, cutting Fluttershy off. “Look, Pinkie, how ‘bout you just do your morning chores and come outside? We’ll go do something together. You really need some time outside.”

Pinkie Pie was initially opposed to the idea, but after a bit of contemplation, she changed her mind. One day inside was typically a long time for her to stay away from her friends, and she also didn’t have any nightmares last night, so her mood was a little better.

“You’re right; I’ve been inside for too long. Just give me a few minutes and I’ll be right out.”

“Great! See you in a jiffy!”

Pinkie went to the bathroom and brushed her teeth. Once she had finished a number of her other morning duties, she walked downstairs, greeted Mr. and Mrs. Cake, and left the house. Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy were waiting by the door.

“Soo… whaddya wanna do?” Raindow Dash inquired.

Pinkie thought about it for a minute. She wasn’t in high enough spirits for a party, so something quiet and relaxing seemed to suit her well. “How about a stroll in town square? I just wanna relax today, and nothing crazy goes on there.”

“Sure,” both pegasi responded simultaneously.

After about ten minutes, the three ponies arrived at the center of Ponyville and were greeted by many a passerby. After exchanging a few “hello”s and “good afternoon”s, the trio settled down on a vacant bench. Pinkie sat down in the middle and put her hooves in her lap, with a solemn look on her face. A minute passed by before someone spoke up - it was Fluttershy, in this case.  

“Um, so, what are we going to do? Sitting on a bench isn’t very fun… at least for me, that is. We can stay here if you two prefer.”

Rainbow spoke next. “Y’know, this isn’t my cup of tea, either. I mean, I could be pulling off fantastic filly flashes right now! I only sat down because Pinkie sat down first…” The pony’s expression suddenly changed from boredom to perplexity. “Wait, why are you even sitting, Pinkie? You should be bouncing around like wild and singing one of your super happy songs!” Rainbow suddenly took on a very serious face. “Okay, you need to tell us what’s really been going on with you. We all know that something’s up.”

“Huh? Nothings wrong! I already told you, I was just tired from…” Pinkie began. However, excuses wouldn’t cut it this time.

“Um, Pinkie,” Fluttershy interjected, “we know that that’s not really the problem. I know you may be stressed with whatever’s happened to you, but the best way to deal with it is to talk to other ponies about it… and I’m truly concerned for you. You’ve never acted like this before, in all the time that I’ve known you.”

And all of this was true. Pinkie knew that, and what Fluttershy had just said really hit home to her. While she was reluctant to completely open up, she mentally agreed that it would do her well to get some of the stress out of her system.

“You’re right… well, I never told you this, but my childhood wasn’t full of sugar and rainbows as you might have though. Truth is… well, my father abused me.”

Rainbow and Fluttershy both assumed looks of shock. The yellow Pegasus even let out a small gasp.

“Wait, that’s not the worst of it. See, I lived through this for a really long time, and…”

Pinkie didn’t have time to finish her sentence, for at that moment a piercing scream came from a distant house. All the ponies jumped at the noise, ears perked, and sat alert for a few seconds before they came to their senses. Rainbow Dash, for one, wasn’t about to let anypony get hurt. “Stay here, I’ll be right back!” she yelled as she launched into the air towards the source of the scream. Fluttershy pursued. “I need to help, too. Sorry, but we’ll have to leave you behind, Pinkie!” Fluttershy said as loud as her little voice would reach, as she was already a fair distance from the the pink pony.

Pinkie blinked, just realizing that she was alone. Her instinct was to follow her friends, but realistically, hooves wouldn’t be able to keep up with wings. By now Rainbow Dash would be at the disturbance already, so there was no use in Pinkie trying to catch up and help. She sat back down on the bench and sighed. It might be a while before her friends came back. It was unlikely that the scream was little more than an overly careful pony being startled by a rat or some other small creature, but in the case of a serious incident, she knew that her friends would stay to help in every possible way.

Unfortunately, Pinkie hadn’t even been able to tell the pegasi about her nightmares; specifically, the one about the black-hooded pony. That dream still stuck in her head like glue. And it was always bothering her. There was a meaning to that pony; it wasn’t just a stray dream about a one-shot character. This pony would come back to her, and she feared that it wouldn’t only be in her subconscious during their next encounter.

Thinking deeply about the dreams, Pinkie noticed that she had closed her eyes. She lifted her eyelids at a relaxed rate, not wanting to rush back into reality.  

But what she saw outside of her mind made her blood run cold. Aside from a fountain and some town buildings, something new was centered in Pinkie’s vision. Something that hadn’t been there before.  

A mare adorned with a black shawl and hood stood looking at Pinkie from the opposite side of the square.