Just Before the Dawn
Chapter 19: 19 - Mistaken Affection
Previous Chapter Next ChapterIn her dreams she saw them, tall figures silhouetted against a flaming sky. They gazed upon her, through her, with empty eyes that spoke of no empathy or emotion. At once they moved towards her, each step crushing the ground beneath them and uncovering vast swaths of mutilated bodies that shook and trembled like living things. Frantically she turned to run, but her legs moved agonizingly slowly. Pleading hooves grasped at her from the ground, held her back, while a thousand agonized voices cried out to her in desperation
Time. It is only a matter...of time. As it has happened once, so shall it happen again.
A feminine voice, distorted and booming, filled her mind until it was all she could hear. She clapped her hooves over her ears and yelled for it to stop. The voice mixed with the screams of the dead and swirled around her in a maddening fury.
Death. You bring only death upon this land. Endless. Senseless.
She screamed uselessly into the storm of voices as they became a howling gale. Still the shadows approached, reaching out for her with strong arms and grasping hands of black ichor. The booming voice shook her with every word it spoke, drawing her deeper into an endless chasm. A face appeared before her, with predatory eyes and a razor maw. A blackened crown, as dark as the night, rested on its incorporeal head, and its jaw distended sickeningly as it yelled in terrible un-words that wrenched her insides.
***
Princess Celestia awoke with a startled jolt, finding her pillow damp with sweat and her heart racing. For a long, confused moment she wondered if the thing in her dream had followed her, but quickly she regained her senses and calmed herself with deep breaths. Still shaking lightly, she sat up and pushed the blanket from her body as she rubbed a hoof against her temple. It was the second time in as many weeks she had had the nightmare. Still the same, still just as vivid.
Moonlight flooded in through the large windows of her private quarters, bathing the room in a soft glow. Celestia pushed herself out of bed and landed on the tile with a clack of her bare hooves. Stumbling and half-asleep, she pushed open the door to the hallway just enough to see out of it. Torch light, far too bright. A Praetorian guard eyed her cautiously through the crack in the door, clearly confused to see his Princess up at such an hour.
"Princess Celestia? Can I...help you?"
"Hibiscus tea. Honey. Twist of lemon." She turned to leave the guard to his duty, then thought better of it. There was no reason to be rude. "...please."
The guard hesitated, unsure of his strange orders.
"Uh, yes, Your Highness. I shall get it for you promptly."
Celestia grunted an acknowledgement and closed the door fully, then threw her balcony doors open with a burst of magic. Cold, crisp night air flooded in, rustling her satin curtains and brushing against her skin. A deep, wonderful lungful cleared her mind.
In the distance, the slivered crescent moon arced high above the mountains. It was very late indeed. Still plenty of time, she pleasantly thought, to fall asleep once more -- but not before having a drink to calm her mind and body.
Of course, she could hardly look at the moon these days without thinking of Luna. Her sister's very essence had been absorbed into it, altering its appearance to serve as a constant reminder of the life she would likely never see again.
My sister, lost to darkness, for the whole world to see.
The visions had been getting stronger, more frequent, as Celestia now suddenly found herself with an abundance of time to think. Life had returned to normal, or a close approximation of it, for the citizens of Canterlot. Part of her considered it a curse; she knew it was never actually Luna, or Nightmare Moon, standing beside her, or tormenting her with cruel words. At times she wanted to shout back at the visions and the voices, but such a thing would surely bring her sanity into question. She could fight them during the day, but by night her dreams were completely beyond her control. In her long life she had never imagined herself being afraid of something as innocent as sleep, and yet she now found herself in exactly that position with every lowering of the sun and raising of the moon.
A quiet knock on her door.
"Princess? I have your tea."
Celestia knew she looked a mess. She was too tired to care.
"Thank you," she said gingerly as she poked the hallway door open enough to grab the tea cup and small plate with her magic. They wobbled and shook, nearly spilling the hot liquid on the floor.
"Are you alright, Princess? Do you require any assistance?"
"I'm fine, thank you," she replied with a faint smile. "Merely a bad dream."
"Very well. Have a good night."
She sighed in relief as she sat on the balcony cushions and sipped her tea -- It was just a little too sweet, but perfectly fine for its purpose. As she enjoyed her drink, flashes of the dream appeared once more. Fears and memories in equal parts, the inescapable past and the possible future. All those years ago, it would have been so much easier to take Luna's advice. Easier, and morally reprehensible. No, so long as there was a chance, she would not fall prey to such ideas. Everyone, she thought, deserves a second chance. Pony, griffon, deer...or human.
***
"Tercio! The hell are you doing?" Rimeberry tapped the other's shoulder with the end of his spear. "You feelin' alright?"
"What? Oh, right. My apologies, Rime, I'm just a bit distracted today. Hard to focus. You understand."
Tercio swore under his breath; for the third time today someone had caught him not paying attention. It wasn't that he didn't care about combat drills, it was that something else was occupying his mind.
"If you say so. Stonewall will have your ass if he finds out you're not devoting yourself to your task."
"I know, I know. Let's just start again, shall we?"
"As you say." Tower shield in front of him, Rimeberry struck the side of his weapon against it. "Your move."
Tercio quickly considered his opponent; Rimeberry was immensely strong, but he favored his left side after the wound he'd sustained in his fight against the assassin Lacertus. Thus far he'd been more of a defensive fighter, attempting to use his raw strength and stubborn combat stance to counter Tercio's faster, lighter movements.
With a shout Tercio lunged with his gladius, then quickly bashed Rimeberry's shield out of the way with his own. The stallion reacted by swinging his foreleg-strapped buckler around hard enough to knock Tercio off balance, then thrust out with his combat spear. When it narrowly missed, he switched his grip to allow for sideways strikes, alternating with powerful shield charges. The impacts caused sparks and small chips of wood to fly from their competing equipment.
Tercio felt in control despite the onslaught of attacks. He'd seen the same thing from others in the Praetorian ranks, those who believed they could easily counter Tercio's larger stature by tripping him up or keeping him close. He wondered if Celestia was watching, and whether she considered him to be a competent soldier. Surely she would after his display in the crystal cavern, unless she thought all of his combat prowess was a result of his trigger word and resulting state of mind. Perhaps a quick glance would--
The world was suddenly far blurrier than he had remembered it being. Harder, too. It took longer than he would have preferred to realize that he was, in fact, on the ground. Not only was he on the ground, but his helm was now sporting a decidedly large dent in its side. Once again he stood up, dusted himself off, and squared off for combat, feeling decidedly embarrassed by his performance.
***
Princess Celestia peered over the edge of her viewing platform, an elevated balcony that gave a full view of the training yard and medicae facilities. Her flowing mane and tail moved gently with the breeze that drifted in from the near-by mountains, covering one eye with pink, green and blue strands of her multi-colored hair. Watching the Praetorians spar with one another was never a particularly interesting affair, but her presence helped reinforce the notion that she was there for those who served her. Occasionally she would tip her head and offer a polite smile to the stallions who glanced her way, and that would be the extent of her excitement for the duration of her appearance. Four hundred years of stallions beating at each other with blunted weapons and shields tended to grow dull in its same-ness.
Such a time, however, was popular with her friends. Or rather, those she considered to be closest to the traditional use of the word. Currently, a trio of mares in their finest, most expensive outfits graced her usually quiet balcony with their continuous chatter, a small group that was less likely to use her good graces for financial, societal, or political gain.
Hopefully.
There was Violet Breeze, from the most affluent district of Canterlot, who had been a frequent guest of the palace since before Luna's banishment. Genuine and heart-felt, Celestia considered her to be the mare most grounded in reality. With her husband off commanding the 41st Equestrian Guard, Violet had come to rely on her visits with Celestia to maintain some semblance of normality in an upper-class society where military service was considered to be beneath the well-to-do. She sat to the right of the Princess of the Sun, levitating a small cluster of grapes and talking with her long-time friend and associate, Picenia.
Older and more open with her words than the others, Picenia had made a name for herself as the premier baker in Equestria's second largest city, Marestopholous, before moving to Canterlot to expand her business. Over three decades she'd become the most prominent producer of bread and baked good of all kinds in Equestria. Her shops fed a sizeable portion of the military, and for that she was treated with respect and courtesy by Celestia and the entirety of the royal court.
She did, however, hold herself in high regard -- especially as an earth pony -- sometimes to her own detriment. Picenia spoke in lofty tones and loved nothing more than to talk about how this baker or that had practically begged her for help, to which she, in her "infinite grace", had, of course, obliged...provided they sold their shop to her in return. Shrewd and sometimes ruthless in her business dealings, Celestia had never-the-less shown her favor as a sign of good faith. Armies marched on their stomachs, after all, a fact the Princess was all too aware of.
Finally, there was the newest member of Celestia's small circle of friends, a young mare barely out of her teens by the name of Sapphire Quill. An earth pony like Picenia, Sapphire was not a mare of industry or the wife of a prominent military figure. Instead, she had made her living as the foremost playwright of the last three generations, being viewed as somewhat of a prodigy after creating the famous performance piece A Shadow at Dawn when she was fresh out of talent school.
Sapphire was a breath of fresh air, more enthusiastic than the others, at least in Celestia's eyes. More concerned with handsome stallions than politics, she enjoyed their time at the balcony as much for the sights as for the conversations. She had an impatient streak, very much a 'here and now' sort of mare. She gazed with interest at the Praetorians fighting below, giggling and making comments to Violet.
"Is it true what they say?" she asked. "Do the Praetorians really have more...endurance?"
"I couldn't tell you, dearie, but I hear their sweat is an aphrodisiac. I saw a mare selling small vials of it in the market just the other day."
"How in the world would they get something like that?"
Violet laughed. "I wasn't about to ask."
"This is not exactly proper conversation for royal discussion," Picenia interjected.
"Don't fret, I'm sure Tia's fine with it. Right?"
Celestia hid an annoyed grunt at the nickname. It was something personal and familiar, a memory of a time when Luna would call her by the shortened name during their imagined adventures that took them through the old castle. She might have objected to Sapphire using it, but she found it difficult to blame the mare's youth and eagerness to hang around the palace. At the end of the day, it was harmless.
"I don't normally discuss such things," Celestia answered with a practiced smile, "but I will not stop you from doing so. Try to keep things somewhat...appropriate...at least."
"Right, right, no details. I understand."
Sapphire pointed a hoof to one soldier in particular, bigger than the others in stature.
"Who was that one again? The...homen?"
"Human," Celestia corrected her. "That would be Ceturion Tercio Krosus. He's somewhat unique, as you can tell."
"He's so...tall! Where does he come from, anyway? Are there more of him?"
"It's a long story, but as far as I know: no, he is the only one of his kind. Why do you ask?"
"Becauuuse," Sapphire answered in a sing-song voice, "I think he likes me."
Violet scoffed. "You think everypony likes you, Sapphire. Not all of them are suitors vying for your hoof."
"No, really! He keeps looking up here, right at me! See for yourself!"
Interested, and more than a little skeptical, Celestia looked down at the gathered Praetorians. Their attacks and dodges kicked up small plumes of dust with every movement, partially obscuring the great sparring rings, but she could just barely make out the human chancing quick glances in her direction. It was unlike him to not be completely focused on his combat partner. Occasionally his momentary lapse of concentration would result in a sword strike or a shield bash that would knock him off balance
"See? He's clearly interested." Another quick glance was paid for in kind by a powerful shield blow to the side of his helm, sending him sprawling across the rough ground. "Ouch."
Picenia waved a dismissive hoof.
"If that's the quality of stallion you're looking for, my dear Sapphire, perhaps you should look elsewhere. Within your own species would be a fine place to start, unless you're aiming particularly low again."
The three mares started to bicker once more, an occurrence that was common in their visits. Sometimes Celestia wondered why she bothered inviting them.
***
As he left the training ring to take a long drink from his water skin, Tercio chanced a longer look at the royal balcony. At least this time he wouldn't have to worry about being knocked senseless. Celestia and the three brightly-colored mares were still there, just distant enough to hide any real detail. He could have sworn he saw her smiling...
"You done for the day or what?" Rimeberry's voice interrupted him in mid-drink, calling from the sparring circle.
"No, no, I'm just a bit parched. I'll be right there."
He knew it was absurd, likely even impossible, but for the past several days the tiniest notion had entered his mind, nested, and grown, as an ember would grow into a wildfire. Such a thing, were he to express it aloud, would surely result in mocking laughter and disbelief from his colleagues, nevermind the Princess herself.
Gods help me, she fills my waking thoughts.
And yet, the more he fretted about it, the more he found it difficult to avert his eyes. He was aware that he'd been catching her sight, and that of her guests, but surely she couldn't ever share such an idea. What was he, but a soldier? And not only a soldier, but one who could lose control of himself with a single word. Nevermind the fact that he was not even equine at all. He was as foreign as one could be in Equestria.
But she? She was a nigh-immortal being of immense power and boundless responsibility. She was flawless in her beauty and unparalleled in her grace. He'd seen first-hand the controlled madness that was her everyday life, a flurry of politicos and agendas and concerns brought forth by her subjects. Finding time for herself was a rare occurrence. She hadn't even taken interest in a suitor since before the time of his great-grandfather Harvest Wind. Why, before the gods old and new, would she ever think of him as he thought of her? She couldn't possibly. Every time he'd spoken with her it had been like a cascade of pure light entered him and filled him with comfort, calming his thoughts and easing his tired muscles. She was untouchable in her perfection.
And yet, the thought lingered, and his eyes wandered, and she met his gaze.
He cursed to himself; he was struck by her, completely and utterly, and there was not a damned thing he could do about it.
***
"Look, he's doing it again! What more proof do you need? I'd fly down there if I had wings, my friends."
"You wouldn't do any such thing, Sapphire."
"I would too! In fact, I'm going to prove you wrong. Again."
The young mare turned to Celestia and smiled brightly.
"Tia, I would like to meet that human Praetorian. Immediately." Sheepishly, she added, "please."
Celestia raised a surprised foreleg. Sapphire had a way of being enthusiastic, but demanding to meet Tercio was far and away the most brash thing she'd done in months. What were the chances Tercio shared Sapphire's affections? Not likely, she concluded.
"I'm...sure he's probably quite busy, my dear friend," Celestia said comfortingly. "The life of a Praetorian is one of discipline and preparation."
"Then let him prepare to meet me. I am curious to know more about him." She prodded Celestia with a hoof. "Come on, he's under your command, right? You could order him to come up here, or meet me down there."
"That's not something I prefer to do if possible. Just as we have our agenda for the day, so does--"
"Come on, Tia. Just a short conversation. What could it hurt?"
Sapphire was likely wasting her time, Celestia thought. Tercio had never shown interest in any of the palace mares -- though she supposed it would get the pushy mare to drop the topic if she talked to him and saw he didn't care for her advances.
"Very well," she surrendered, "I will ask him to speak with you, but I will not order it. He is not a slave, Sapphire."
"He could be my slave," the other giggled.
Violet Breeze rolled her eyes. "This is going to go well, I can already see it."
***
Who in the world was Sapphire Quill?
That was the question on Tercio's mind as he walked up the three flights of stairs between the training area and the palace common grounds. The name didn't sound familiar, but the messenger made it quite clear that he or she was interested in meeting him. A dignitary, perhaps? An old family friend?
He didn't have to wait long to get an answer. As he pushed through the outer doors he saw a mare sitting at a low table, her eyes already upon him and a wry smile on her face.
"Hello, Sir Tercio," she said. "It's a pleasure to meet you."
"Likewise," Tercio answered cautiously. He stood before her with his hands behind his back in a semi-relaxed military stance. "You must be Sapphire Quill, I assume..."
"The one and only." She patted a spot next to her. "Come, sit. I insist."
Confused, Tercio did as she asked. She was, at the very least, quite attractive, with a cream-colored coat and light pink mane and tail, complimented by eyes the color of her namesake. While Tercio did not exactly consider himself an accurate judge of age, especially for mares, he didn't think her much older than her early twenties.
"I'm sorry, Lady Sapphire Quill, I don't believe we've met."
"No, we haven't. That's why I invited you here." She motioned to a tall carafe. "Can I interest you in some fine amasec? Princess Celestia provided it for us. She's such a good friend." When Tercio declined she shrugged it away. "Suit yourself, human." She studied him for a time, leaving Tercio feeling somewhat awkward as the silence crept along longer than he was comfortable with. "I saw you training today, in the sparring ring. You're quite the fighter."
"I try to be. The life of Princess Celestia depends on it, nevermind my own and that of the stallions fighting alongside me." When she didn't say anything -- simply smiling back like a school filly -- Tercio felt the patience in him beginning to wane. "If there is something I can help you with...?"
"There might be. You see, I saw you looking up at me for some time. It was quite frequent, more than a mistake or a curious glance. In fact, it was hard to ignore."
Oh no.
"I've seen my share of stallions, Sir Tercio, and even in a human it is apparently not any different. That look of unbridled desire, a sort of...curious, yet longing need to set your eyes upon my not-insignificant curves. Would I be right?"
Tercio almost laughed in her face. "Look, Sapphire, I appreciate the idea but--"
He realized he couldn't blurt out the fact that he was staring at Celestia, especially if this young mare was as close to the Princess as she'd claimed. Images of the Princess and her royal friends laughing at his admission flashed before him. There had to be a way out of this.
"I want to make you an offer, Sir Tercio. One you might find to be in your interests."
"And that is?"
"I appreciate the hard work you and your brothers -- or whatever you call the ponies with you -- put forth in defense of Equestria. I have never had much of an interest in combat myself; my talents lie more in the fields of drama, tragedy and comedy. I do, however, speak with enough stallions at my shows to know how difficult your life can be. With that in mind, I'm prepared to offer you and your...what do you call it? The name for your group that lives under the same roof?"
"My contubernium?"
"That's it, contubernium. I want to extend my hoof to you and your friends, or partners, or however you like to call them, to a grand feast and celebration in your shared honor. There will be drinking and dancing and laughter to be had by all, and you won't pay a single coin for it. After all, I'd say you've all earned a little relaxation after saving Canterlot, wouldn't you?"
"The stallions I fought beside would certainly appreciate such a thing, sure," he replied, nodding. "But why not ask one of them? Imperator Stonewall is our immediate commanding officer...sort of. You would surely do well to bring this before him."
Sapphire shrugged and tossed her mane. "Why would I do that when I could speak with you instead? You're much more...exotic."
"I prefer to be thought of as just another man, Lady Sapphire."
"Pfft. You and I both know you're not just another rank and file soldier. You're so much more interesting than that."
She was getting increasingly aggressive with her compliments. Something was quite clearly going on.
"I'm not sure I'm the one--"
"I won't waste any more of your time, so please don't waste mine. To put it simply, I am offering to treat your fellow Praetorians to a night of merriment they won't soon forget...on the condition that you allow me some of your time once you arrive."
'Some time' could mean any number of things -- though from her expression, and the mistaken belief that his affection was aimed her way, it was clear she did not intend to discuss politics.
"I know this is quite sudden, but I'm a spontaneous sort of mare. I am not asking you to bow before me or anything so grand, and I assure you I will not slip any essence of moonlight blossom into your chalice. You're such an interesting figure, Sir Tercio. It's not every day one gets to learn more about the only male of his kind. I would very much like to know more about you in good time. You don't have to hide the fact that you're interested in me, for I'm quite interested in you."
Part of him knew it was a bad idea to stay around the pushy mare and her sudden, strangely aggressive come-on. She reminded him of an old marefriend from his teenage years; she, too, was interested in him for his unique looks as much as his personality -- probably more one than the other -- and she'd been quite exciting during a few weeks of sleepless nights, but in the end she'd left like the others. As a younger man Tercio would have jumped at the chance to be with an attractive mare and leave it at that, but his older, wiser self had begun to look for something more.
Still...the Praetorians could use a break. They'd trained and sweated and bled for months on end with little in the way of relief, and the stress was beginning to eat away at their morale, nevermind the continued, lingering pains and reminders of their numerous wounds from the attack on the palace. If this mare was so oddly interested in him, he could always just grin and bear it while his brothers in arms enjoyed themselves. He owed them that much for taking him in as one of their own.
"Alright," he finally answered, not entirely sure of himself, "my brothers and I will join you, should you wish it. I am sure they will be pleased to hear the news. Gods know they need some time off. You will have to run this by Stonewall and Celestia, though. They may not be so easy to convince."
Sapphire Quill gave a short, self-assured laugh.
"Sir Tercio, I do not believe you fully understand who I am. Leave it to me."
***
Brother-Captain Corvalix stood before the royal throne, his head bowed low. His sovereign sat upon her dais, considering the battle-scarred deer who had presented himself in his finest formal wear; a loose wrapping of silks, with a green sash decorating his shoulders, marking him as a war hero. A thin, golden thread hung from the tip of his antlers, ending in a green gem that flashed as it caught the sun.
"You called on me, sister?" he asked, his head still lowered.
"Corvalix. Yes. Thank you for coming." The tall, willowy doe stepped down, her regal cloak flowing across the tile behind her. She looked upon her sibling with emerald eyes, lifting his chin with a cloven hoof. "How do you fare?"
"As well as is to be expected. My wounds are fresh but I am alive." He motioned to a wrapped gash along his side which stained his red-brown fur and white spots a dark crimson.
"You are hurt?"
"A small band of Equestrians found me yesterday, during a scouting run. I managed to slay them to the last, but not without consequence. It could have been worse."
"I see. Do try to avoid such things in the future, won't you?"
He turned up a corner of his mouth in a grin. "I shall try. No guarantees, however."
"That will have to do." His sister trotted to a large map of Whitetail, where various divisions had been marked with gems of different colors. "How goes the war with the Equestrians?"
"The Whitetail are determined fighters, clever when they're allowed to be, but they remain without proper leadership. They still think me one of them, the fools. Their senate is a hollow thing, ineffective and too busy bickering amongst one another to take decisive action."
"Will they hold?"
"Their army? No. The Whitetail fight well, but it is a losing war. The Equestrians lack the raw numbers but their soldiers show remarkable initiative at the company, platoon, even individual level. Whitetail underestimated the ferocity with which the ponies would respond, and now fight a defensive war. The bulk of the deer forces are holed up in the old fortress town of Quillyyn, just past the edge of the forest. It is a strong place to fight from."
"And the Equestrians?"
"They continue to take steady losses. Make no mistake, however -- they will triumph in the end. No army has faced Equestrian soldiers in hundreds of years. They have the element of surprise with them in every battle." Corvalix trotted to the map, levitating a crystalline staff. "Once Quillyyn has fallen there will be no major strongholds between the Equestrians and the Whitetail capitol of Evinwiir. Our cousins will be broken in mind and body, unable to continue fighting with any real resolve. Peace negotiations, I believe, will follow soon after. Celestia will have her victory. She may even have a good bit of Whitetail land to add to her nation."
The deer ruler stamped a hoof on the ground.
"In an ideal world, perhaps."
"Indeed, sister. The Whitetail will be begging for help. Already they ask us for aid. They need only grow more desperate. A few weeks at the most, and we shall be their saving grace." Corvalix leaned his staff against the wall. "Before we commit to such a plan, I must ask once more: are you absolutely sure of this course of action? Our...prior attempts...at destabilizing Equestria have all ended poorly."
The doe considered his words, cocking her head as she studied the large map.
"Would you have our nation remain a shadow of its former self? Would you see twenty generations of Redtail ingenuity and tenacity fall by the wayside?"
"Of course not. I simply do not wish to see our efforts become a minor note in a history scroll."
"You worry too much, brother. Lacertus' death was certainly a disappointment, but it was not entirely unexpected. The Nightmare Moon cults are easily swayed, and serve as useful fodder, but they, too, are inconsequential. They merely serve a greater purpose they've no idea of. There is always another way to add a little chaos to the mix; we must wait for the proper time, however, lest we reveal ourselves too soon."
Corvalix snickered at his sister's cunning.
"Mother and father always did consider you somewhat of a trickster. If only they could be here to see us now."
"Then the least we could do is provide them with something to be proud of from the Great Beyond, wouldn't you agree?"
"Without a doubt." Corvalix bowed his head once more, satisfied that their long-standing plan was finally coming together. They had waited nearly three decades; a few more weeks would be nothing.
"Until next time, Corvalix. Do take care."
"And you as well. I shall see you soon," he said confidently, "my dear Elinwynn."
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