"Did you sleep at all?"

I turned, peering over the rim of my coffee cup. "Good morning to you too, Kikuri."

"I'm serious, Ringer. You look like a mess. More so than usual." She trotted up beside me, kissing my cheek and pouring herself some coffee. "When was the last time you showered?"

"Maybe a week or so. I've been busy." I put the empty mug back on the counter, pushing my mane back out of my eyes. "I'll get to it soon enough."

"Why don't you do it now? The detectives are still investigating our next case, so we should have until noon."

"That long?" I lifted my ears, frowning.

Kikuri rolled her eyes. "It's straightforward, so it's an intern day. Chances are they won't even need you to come in; I don't think there was a death."

"Heh, that's a new one." I let the muscles in my back relax. "Jeez, it's been so long since I had a day off..."

"There aren't many ponies with your talents, Ringer," Kikuri whispered, looking back over her shoulder. "Go take a bubble bath or something. I'll go down to the Lanky Mare and pick up some snacks."

"You'll be safe on your own?"

She rolled her eyes, transforming into one of the more burly members of our squad team; a dusky-coated Pegasus stallion that was prone to accidentally knocking things over from leaning on them too much. She lifted one eyebrow, tossing her head to get her mane to fall away from her eyes. "Better?"

"A bit strange," I admitted, "but it's perfect if it keeps you safe."

"I'll be fine no matter what," Kikuri mumbled, leaning forward and nuzzling my cheek. "I can just bite them if they get too close."

"Don't make me have to bail you out of jail." I replied, hesitantly kissing the muzzle of my teammate. "You'll have to come back soon so I can properly show my affection. I don't think Star Spray would be appreciative of me making out with his doppelganger."

"Ha ha, very funny. Now go relax, I'll come back with donuts or something." Kikuri blew me a kiss before trotting out, locking the door from the outside.

Once I heard the elevator doors open, I sunk down to the ground. The tiles under my hooves warped and blurred as my blood rushed in my ears, and I tasted bile in my throat. "I am powerful, I am in control. I am powerful, I am in control."

I slowly rose to my hooves, biting back a wail as a headache took hold. I could hear him hear him hear him feel his hooves on my coat feel his pressure on my bones smell the reek of his breath and the wave wave wave of his body over mine the glint in his eyes as he bit down on my ear the tear of skin and the taste of blood in my mouth

I tilted my head back and let out a primal scream, venting my pain to the empty apartment. I wished I had wings so I could fly away over the city, replace my thoughts with the rush of wind, but all I had were my heavy hooves and the ache of my own muscles. The memories of the mare had dug into my mind like a dragon's claws, and they refused to let go.

I wailed again, feeling my coat stand on end. Tears were on my muzzle, but wasn't sure when they had started. There were needles of agony racing through my bloodstream, stabbing my heart and making my muscles tense with pain. My breath came in rough gasps, tearing through my throat like razor blades. The sense of being pushed down became stronger and stronger until I folded to the tile floor, sides heaving for breath. I stared at the door, willing Kikuri to return and hoping that she didn't so I could get myself together.

My vision blurred, and suddenly I was muzzle-deep in trash, choking on a scrap of fabric as his hooves pushed me down and down and dug round bruises into my shoulders, felt the pain and the pain and the pain

I screamed again, unable to contain my anger and injury. It reverberated, chasing off the demons in my skull. I screamed again, and again, and again, until I was fearful of the silence that would come when I stopped. Howling like a wounded animal, I stumbled to the bathroom and set the shower running with the plug in the bathtub. I let my howling die off and allowed the sound of the shower and the bathroom fan to take its place. Taking a few deep breaths, I dipped my head under the rising water and crouched there awkwardly, allowing the dull pattering of the shower on the water to fill my ears.

For a moment, I considered just exhaling and ending it all, but then I pictured Kikuri coming home to the overflowing bathroom and my body, and I couldn't bear it. I lifted my head from the water, tilting my head up so that the warm water splashed over my face.

"Ringer? Ringer?!"

I opened the shower curtain, dumbly staring at the closed bathroom door. It swung open, revealing Kikuri halfway through transforming back into a Changeling. She blinked one wide blue eye at me before finishing her transformation, surging forward and wrapping her hooves around my neck.

"Kiki? What is it?"

"The neighbors heard screaming and couldn't get in because the door was locked. They were out in the hallway yelling for you. Dear Celestia, Ringer, I thought someone had broken in. I thought you were..."

I reached out, carefully settling my hooves on her back. I pressed my head into her shoulder, blocking out the rest of the world. She rested her chin on the top of my head and slowly climbed into the bathtub behind me, letting me sink down into the warm water while she ran her hooves through my mane. She smiled sadly as she looked down at me, her mouth opening slightly as she tasted my emotion in the air.

"Ringer, I would have stayed here for you if I knew it was that bad. I'm always here for you, sweetheart."

"I didn't want to be a burden." I replied softly, reaching a hoof up to rub my eyes. "I've been able to deal with it before, so why couldn't I deal with it now?"

"Just because you run every day doesn't mean a marathon isn't hard." Kikuri said, levitating the shampoo from the side of the tub and massaging the foam into my mane. "You're allowed to ask for help."

I leaned back into her, breathing in the scent of citrus and her own soft honey smell. "I thought I should be strong for you."

"If you saw me in the same state that you are, even if I was hiding it well, what would you do?" She rubbed my favourite spot, behind my ears, and I let out a quiet moan. "I don't think you would ignore me. Treat yourself the way you treat me, Ringer."

"I couldn't," I mumbled, looking away. "You're my everything. I'm... nothing."

Kikuri tapped my forehead with one hoof, pulling me further up into her lap with the other. Not for the first time, I felt the shivering under her skin of her muscles, and I wondered how she had gotten so strong while I had grown weaker. "You're my everything, hun. I don't know what I'd do without you."

"Find someone better." I replied.

"There is nobody better than you, Ringer. Who was the pony who pulled me out of the club when I was ready to go home with a stallion I didn't know?"

"I was."

"Who was the pony who found me in a back alley, freezing half to death and in my true form, and wrapped me up in a blanket and carried me to her apartment?"

"I was."

"Who is the most perfect marefriend I could ever ask for?"

I smiled thinly, closing my eyes. "I am."

Kikuri leaned down and kissed my forehead, pushing my soapy mane back towards my ears. "And don't you forget it."

We sat together, quiet in the rising water, breathing in the smell of bubbles and each other. After a while, when the water rose too high, Kikuri leaned over me and turned off the tap, stepping out and drying herself with a flash of green flame.

"I'm going to go and talk to the neighbors and put the groceries away, alright?"

"Yeah. I'll be out soon."

She trotted out, closing the door softly behind her. The small gap under the door glowed green as she changed shape, and then she continued down the hall. The bubbles enveloped me as I sank lower into them, and eventually dipped completely under the water. Air bubbles slipped up from my mouth as I shook the leftover suds from my mane.

The bathroom air was cold when I climbed out, making my coat stand on end before I could wrap a towel around it. Ugh, I hated the cold. I pulled on Kikuri's green bathrobe as well, hoping she wouldn't mind me getting it wet. I stepped cautiously into the hallway, hoping my wet hooves wouldn't slip on the hardwood.

"Are you dry?" She called from the kitchen.

"No."

"Are you wearing my bathrobe?

"...Yes?"

"Ringer, baby, I told you green wasn't your color! Can't you go buy your own, maybe in yellow or blue?"

"I hate yellow because it's too bright and I hate blue because it's too sad," I explained, turning into the kitchen. "Green? Green is nice and neutral. Happy, but not overpowering. You get me?"

"So what you're saying is you want neutral. So like... gray."

"Gray is boring too."

Kikuri rolled her eyes, turning around with a plate of warm cookies in her magical grasp. "Is there any color you like other than green?"

"Yes! Avocado, leaf, pine..."

"Stop being annoying and eat something sugary. You need a kick in your system."

"What flavor are these?"

"Cookie." Kikuri deadpanned, pouring the milk. "Just kidding, it's cricket."

"You put cricket in my food?!" I replied, staring at the tray.

"I put cricket in my ones." She said casually, lifting a smaller plate. "Yours are honey carrot."

"Thank you, sweetheart."

"You'll just have to do me a favor later." She sat down beside me, placing the two cookie trays on the table and setting down the glasses of milk. "Mine aren't cricket. They're just honey."

I glanced over at her, smirking. "I had no idea you were messing with me. Not a fan of healthy foods?"

"You have no idea how much sugar I put in both of these. If you are deluding yourself with healthy, you might as well just put a slice of apple on a triple fudge sundae and call it a diet."

"Don't dampen my spirits," I grumbled. "I like carrots."

"I know. Why do you think I baked you cookies with carrots in them?" Kikuri lifted one of the cookies up and hovered it in front of my face. "See that orange stuff? That's compassion."

Someone knocked on the door, cutting off my possibly funny retort. "I've got it."

"You've got what?" She replied, blinking in confusion.

I trotted out of the kitchen, opening the door but leaving the lock chain in place. "Who's there?"

A tan Pegasus stallion looked back, his eyes reddened and his feathers matted and... falling out? Someone's feathers were in his messy red mane and tail, at least. He looked me over, frowning. "Green ain't your color, man."

"Why are you knocking on my door?"

"I heard some crazy voodoo guy who could talk to ghosts was here." The stallion rubbed his eyes, knocking a feather out of his forelock. "You homin' a guy like that?"

"Why would you want to talk to him?"

The stallion looked around, making sure the hallway was empty. "Me and my girl, we had a bad run-in with the Downtown Dogs. They took her 'way down their crazy tunnels and I got all messed up trying to follow 'em. Nearly tore my wings off. I've been worried sick ever since, man, can't sleep, feathers fallin' out, can't even go outside without these crazy panic attacks. I need to know if my girl is dead."

Hesitantly, I unlocked the door. I looked back at Kikuri for her acceptance, and she gave me a strange look before going back to the kitchen. The stallion walked in cautiously, his legs wobbling. He nearly collapsed on the couch, looking incredibly pitiful.

"Look, sir...?"

"Flame Trail." He said quietly.

"Flame Trail, do you need a doctor?" I said, placing my hoof on his. "I know people that won't ask for names or ID. They can get you fixed up without getting you in trouble-"

"No!" He screeched. "No doctors!"

"Okay, okay, no doctors. It was just a suggestion." His hoof was frigid under mine, and his eyes suddenly seemed deep and dark. "What did your marefriend look like? What was her name?"

"She's white-coated, with a golden mane and tail. Blue eyes. A... Pegasus. Her name is Arrowhead." He closed his eyes, shuffling his wings so that a few feathers shedded onto the couch.

I nodded, taking a deep breath. For a second, it was as if an entire network of invisible threads around me suddenly flickered and thrummed, and the vague shape of a mare began to take form in front of the couch. Parts of her blurred in and out of vision, patches of white and gold against the soft browns and reds of the apartment.

"Trapped---------help---afraid----alone," the inconsistent spirit said, flashes of eyes wide with terror. "You can---------save-------------help."

"I can't hear you. Are you still alive?" I prompted.

She nodded jerkily. "Alive----------but----------not-------------------------------too strong---------------too strong!"

I tried to reach out to comfort her, but she flickered and disappeared. I turned to the colt, his eyes blissfully unaware to the vision. "She's alive. I'll take the team out to try and find her as soon as I can."

"I... I'll go." He whispered, hopping off the couch and trotting back outside. I turned away to wipe the feathers off of the couch, only to find them gone. When I turned around to ask him about it, he had gone as well. Had I missed the sound of the door closing?

"You're exhausted, Ringer." Kikuri called from the kitchen, her voice oddly shaky. "Let's just stay in bed today, okay? We can go out for dinner later."

"A day in bed?" I teased. "That's more time than you usually let me have with you."

"Shut up, sweetheart." She replied. Her eyes clouded with worry as she glanced towards the couch, but she quickly hid it by heading to the bedroom.

Did she think I shouldn't help this colt? She had to understand what I was doing. I would do it for her in a heartbeat.

So why would this be any different?