"What the BUCK were you thinking Hex?"

Apparently there was a pair of obscenely irate princesses in the room with me, lead by one incredibly pissed small purple Alicorn.  A certain Princess who did not seem to care that my head was killing me at the moment.

"You did blood magic at the base of the statue of Discord.  Do you have any idea what the consequences for that could be?  Do you?  I don't even want to get into the fact that you tried to tap into the magic that keeps the world alive.  It's everything I could do to keep my sister from executing you while you slept," Luna interjected rather loudly.

All that was left was the speech from the royal one herself.  One speech that never seemed to come as Celestia just stood there, glaring at me and shaking with rage.  I think I done messed up.  Time to see if I can save my butt on this one.  Saving myself the usual sigh I would start with, I just jumped straight in as I tried to sit up.  I also realized that I was completely naked and giving the ladies one hell of a show.

"Princess, Twilight, calm down please.  This was just an experiment.  Granted, it did get a bit out of hand, but I was just trying to see what I could do to draw and use my magic.  I didn't know that I was touching.  I might be an idiot, but I'm not suicidal.  As for Discord, it's just a creepy statue.  What does it matter if I get a little blood on it?  I'd intended on wiping it off later.  I picked that spot so I wouldn't kill anything in the gardens, pony, plant, or otherwise."

They just looked at each other and then back at me like I had grown a third head.

"Hex, the statues in that garden are not, and I cannot stress this enough, ARE NOT statues.  They are enemies of Equestria that we could not destroy, so we sealed them in stone instead."

"Celestia, can you say that one more time.  I think I heard something crazy about statues not being statues," I stated flatly.

"That is the purpose of the maze.  If one of them breaks free, the earth itself would try to seal them away behind the elements.  The earth and all of its species would rise up and entomb the creatures until we could arrive and deal with it with finality."

Well fuck.  I really screwed the pooch this time.  I did the only thing that came to mind to keep myself from being turned into a pigeon poop trap.  Apologize.  

"If I had known that, I would have looked into finding a more suitable spot to do this.  If I had known that the earth itself would kick my ass, or was protecting something this valuable, I certainly wouldn't have done this.  I'm not insane.  That said, if you feel that I need to stay in this cell again, I would understand."

Apparently, the world if full of insanity though, as Celestia sighed and said words I never expected to hear.

"Hex, WE were wrong.  We should have informed you of all of this before letting you try to develop your abilities.  We should have also informed you about the state of your property sooner.  We will forgive your transgressions this one time.  If you ever try anything like this again, you will be met with harsh Royal judgement.  Understood?"

All I could do is nod.  Granted I fucked up, but I pretty much got an apology and a slap on the wrist.

"Considering how you use magic, my sister and I have consulted several ponies, including the Archmage.  We have decided on one path regarding your abilities.  You will be moved out of the castle effective immediately as you pose a danger to civilized society.  Second to this, your property will be returned.   You will be released from our care and placed into the custody of my former student.  Until suitable living arrangements can be found, you will reside with Twilight Sparkle until she feels that you are able to manage yourself safely.  If you attempt to leave without her or our permission, the wrath of the Royal Guard will fall on your head."

My head was pretty much spinning at this point.  Am I getting banished?  Why the fuck am I basically a ward of Twilight Sparkle?  What the hell is going on?!

"Your property is currently being moved to Ponyville and can be collected on your arrival.  From your silence, we assume you prefer this option to being stoned.  If you wish to keep yourself this way, you will remain silent.  Twilight will explain everything later.  If you need to speak with us, inform my student and she will decide if it is worth our time."

With a swish of her tail, Celestia turned and clopped out of the room with Luna in tow.

"Twilight, I..."

"Save it Hex.  We'll talk about this later.  It has been a long night.  Now get dressed.  I want to get home and to bed."

A small growl escaped my throat as I pushed off the table, quickly turning into a snarl when my bare feet hit the cold stone floor as pain shot up my body.  More curiously though was the burst of gold flames that erupted from my left hand that was quickly shrouded in black fur.

"Um, Twlight?"

"Not now.  Get dressed."

The flames quickly shot up my left arm and spread across my body, hardly even painful, more of an itch as fur erupted anywhere the gold touched.  As my bones began to shift, I panted as it forced the air out of my lungs.  The pony just stood there with her back to me.

"Are you nearly done with the gross noises?  I'd really like to be going soon."

The only reply she got was a deep rumbling growl as my form began to tower over her.  A thought about smacking her aside and bolting crossed my mind, only to be overridden by a sharp pain in my temple.  I could feel blood dripping down my face.

"Oh yeah, the princesses attached a small spell to you.  If you even think about hurting anypony, the consequences for you would be rather...dire.  Yes, we know that your form can shift now.  Let's go."

Well fuck me.  Definitely a case of out of the frying pan and into...well somewhere much much worse than the fire.

Why does this crap keep happening to me?