A loud groan had become Cerulean’s new wake up call, as the day of birth drew ever closer, bringing with it what Twilight assured him were contractions that could cripple him in an instant. While she hadn’t taken out her fury on him for months, she was growing increasingly frustrated with her inability to function normally due to her condition, especially when it interfered with her research. She was midway through casting an experimental spell to paint any image she could conjure in her head when a particularly potent wave of contractions caused her to double over, the spell blasting through the canvas and leaving a rather large circle of the wall charred.

“Twilight, do I smell something burning?” Cerulean called out from the bottom floor as he heard her cries from the upper floor.

“Yes, it’s the remnants of my self control. I am so over being pregnant!” Using a touch of magic, he put out the tiny blaze in the woodwork as he ascended the stairs. He decided that, for the sake of the structural integrity of the library and perhaps his own well being, he should likely attempt to calm the mare down.

“Twilight, it’s just one more month. Come on, you can manage that, right?”

“Easy for you to say, you’re not the one getting kicked at all hours of the night.”

“Twilight, if I could ease the pain even for a day, I would.” Twilight froze at the statement, the solution to her distress fiendishly simple.

“Cerulean, did you mean what you just said?”

“Twilight, of course I did. You think I feel like I’m adequately helping you cope just by doing a spot of cleaning and making food? The farther along this goes, the more useless to help I feel.”

“You do more than you know, Cerulean. Come here,” she motioned, and as he leaned down she touched her horn to his and shared a small amount of her love for him. He opened his eyes to see her gazing up at him, before a powerful magical surge caused them both to lose consciousness.

Twilight was the first to awaken a few hours later. Aside from a tingling sensation in her horn and the tips of her limbs, she felt totally fine. She did, however, find it odd that her eyes were failing to perceive color correctly, as her legs appeared blue to her. As she stood up from the side of the bed she gave a cry of alarm as she beheld her body laying in bed, still asleep.

“What the hay is going on?” she cried, backing away fearfully as her form stirred into wakefulness amidst much groaning. Wait a second, what was with my voice? It sounded just like Cerulean’s! Oh no... Twilight dashed into the bathroom and her suspicions were confirmed as she beheld her blue coat and white mane, the telltale streak of teal confirming her suspicions. “No no no, this is all wrong! It was just supposed to transfer the sense of feeling, not the consciousness!”

“Ugh, Twilight, what did you do to me? I feel horrible. And what’s with your voice, you sound just like...” There was a pause, followed by a scream in her own voice, and Twilight poked her head around the corner and stared at her body while Cerulean did the same of his. “Oh Celestia, really Twilight? You switched our bodies?”

“I just meant to transfer sensations, not everything! You said you wouldn’t mind taking the pain for a time, so I didn’t think it would do any real harm.” To her surprise, Cerulean said nothing at this, at least not right away.

“I meant it, Twilight. If you have to use my body to accomplish this, then that is fine. Go have a day of fun, and don’t worry about me, ok?”

“Cerulean, are you sure?”

“I’d get out of bed and tackle you, but unfortunately I believe somepony has replaced my limbs with lead, so I’ll let you go easy this time. Is there some trick to breathing, or do you constantly feel short of breath?” he gasped, having rolled over to his normal position on his back.

“You’re going to want to never, ever roll on your back, Cerulean. And you may or may not need ten or more pillows to get to sleep.” Cerulean was quickly growing a newfound appreciation for Twilight’s strength, even in just the first few minutes he had experienced being pregnant in her body. “I’m actually kind of scared to leave you alone. I’m constantly having you bring things for me and asking for help.”

“Well, I’m not quite as fanatical about creating spells to make my fiancé stick to the ceiling, either,” he said with a chuckle, wincing as the motion put unwanted strain on his swollen abdomen. “Go on, Twilight. You’ve earned a day off. Just don’t do anything strange with my body, ok?” At this, she took a glance between her legs and noticed that she had gained something unexpected, and Cerulean couldn’t help but laugh as she snapped her head upright, blushing violently.

“It feels... strange.” Cerulean had been too focused on the myriad of things happening within his pregnant body to notice the change, but as she spoke these words he suddenly became aware of the notable change to his own physique, a change he hadn’t felt since the departure of his alter ego, Mandarin.

“Yes... yes it does.” Even stranger for the two of them was that, since their minds were still their own, looking over their new bodies still brought on feelings of desire. Yet, the bodies themselves were still attracted to their original owners, causing a two way flow of utterly confusing allure. “Twilight, don’t even think about it,” he warned as she again stared between her legs with growing fascination.

“Huh? I wasn’t... I mean... later, Cerulean! Errr, Twi, uh... Bye!” she stammered before bolting downstairs and out the door. She stood outside the library for a moment, impressed with her sudden burst of speed as she realized that she had a capable body to do with as she pleased. It felt good to be able to run, and without a second thought she burst into a gallop, racing through town and laughing as her heartrate pumped out exhilaration along with an increased flow of blood. She was just passing the train station when she saw Rarity paying for a ticket, decked out in a lavish chapeau and a dress fit for a princess.

Slowing to a stop, the thought danced through her mind that she really needed to make amends with Rarity, both for herself and Cerulean. While she wasn’t particularly guilty over anything she had done, there was a definite rift forming, and as trying as Rarity could be, she loved the mare all the same. “Hey, Rarity! Where are you going?” She turned and gave Twilight a dull stare before returning her eyes forward and waiting for the boarding call. “Is everything ok?”

Ok? No, everything is not ok! You’ve fed me one of my closest friend’s... magical secretions, prompted her to turn my gems to ordinary rocks, and torn her away from me! Not only that, but you, in all your filth, have perverted her into a vile mare that gleefully torments me at every turn! And you have the gall to ask me if everything is ok?!? “I am fine.” Fine, yes, as in “I have a show in Canterlot in a few hours, have woken up late, and been informed that my top model has opted out at the last moment!” Months of preparation are to go to waste, and of all the times that this despicable creature that calls himself a stallion decides to show up without warning, it simply had to be now, asking me in his vexingly cheerful tone if I am all right.

“Um... are you sure?” Twilight watched the mares eyes dart back and forth as she waged some kind of internal war. The external signs were grinding teeth, strained muscles in the neck, and a look that probably could petrify a cockatrice with a little more effort. It did cross her mind to reveal that she was, in actuality, Twilight Sparkle inside Cerulean’s body, but if she could manage to get on Rarity’s good side somehow as she was without letting such a fact be known, it may just pull Cerulean back to a positive score in her rankings, or at least a healthy zero. “Listen, Rarity, it’s easy to see you’re flustered. If there’s anything I can do to help, I...”

“Do not think for a single moment that I would allow somepony like yourself to aid me in any way, Cerulean.” Twilight waited for the expected surge of hormonal rage but instead felt only an increased longing to fix the situation.

“Rarity, I will do anything you ask, no matter how degrading, loathsome or downright humiliating it may be. I somehow doubt that simple words will travel far in making reparations, and I really do want to fix things between us.” Dare I hope? I could swear she’s actually giving it some thought.

“Cerulean, give me your word that you will do as I ask, and I may just bring myself to set your transgressions aside.”

“Barring cheating on Cer... Twilight, I will do as you ask.” Ok, if Rarity can sound that evil while chuckling, then I fear for what she’s like if she ever gets pregnant.

“Ok Cerulean, I hope you enjoy dressing up. You’re my new top model. Oh, and you can’t tell Twilight about anything from now until we get back from Canterlot.”

“Say WHAT?!?”

Pregnancy is often painted as a wonderful journey, an almost magical experience for the mother as she builds a bond with the child even before it’s born. Cerulean quickly came to two conclusions being trapped in Twilight’s body. First, there is plenty of magic involved in the process. There was simply no other way to explain how the weight gain around the stomach could possibly translate into body wide aches and fatigue to the point that even lifting one’s head from its place of rest upon a frugal stack of three pillows felt like a monumental chore. And secondly, there seemed to be some kind of problem with the communication flow with the foal that seemed to only kick at the most inopportune times. Cerulean couldn’t help but wonder if he were the first stallion to experience pregnancy, and with these thoughts dancing through his head a shift and a kick bade him drag himself from bed and over to the restroom for the third time in an hour, likely again, a product of the “magic” of pregnancy; the shrinking of the bladder.

“Spike? Can you come here?” he called out, returning to bed and laying in the most comfortable position he could find, which still didn’t come close to relaxing. The purple dragon dutifully ascended from the main floor and stood by the bed expectantly, awaiting his task. “Ice cream, a whole quart of it, please.”

“What, that’s it?”

“What do you mean?”

“No pickles? Mustard? Vinegar and maple syrup?”

“Ugh, are you trying to make me lose my appetite? Just the ice cream, please.” Shrugging off the sudden change in dietary habits, Spike wandered downstairs, opened the freezer door and resisted the urge to first help himself, returning upstairs and setting the frozen treat down on bed.

“Here you go, Twilight. Need anything else?”

“No, this should be fine for now, go ahead.” Not feeling the slightest inclination to move, he decided to try eating entirely with magic, popping off the lid and digging in with a spoon that he quickly deemed much too small. Foregoing any sense of dignity or manners, he began devouring the ice cream straight from the container, though it just didn’t seem to taste right. A kick confirmed his suspicions, and he immediately set about brainstorming what could possibly fix the taste. “Hmmm, chocolate syrup is always a... oof, calm down in there,” he muttered, staring at his swollen stomach. “I wonder, what about caram... ugh, would you sit still? Geez, what do you want, pickle juice and licorice sauce?” An immediate calm within aroused his curiosity. “Mustard?” Another kick. “Pickles and licorice?” Silence. Suddenly, Twilight’s whims made so much sense. “Spike?”

“What is it, Twilight?” he asked, again stopping by the bedside.

“Could you shovel a rather large bowl full of this and top it with... pickles and licorice sauce?”

“I was wondering when you were gonna ask. Sure, Twilight, be right back.”

“Oh, Spike, one more thing.”

“Yeah?”

“Can you bring me Twi... I mean, my diary?”

It was a good thing that Cerulean’s mind didn’t possess the knowledge of any noise cancelling spells, because after Rarity had gotten to talking about just how huge an event she was to take part in, she never stopped. Two hours of non-stop talk about fashion, fashion designers, critiques on fashion; it was too much. Twilight had never cared much for it herself, and as they stepped off the train, she welcomed the sudden cessation of speech much like the fresh air that she gratefully gasped in, having been smothered by the torrent of trendy jargon.

“Come, Cerulean, we will have to hurry so they can spend adequate time with your make up. At least you keep your mane in tidy order, that’s one less thing to worry about.”

“Wait, my ears must be deceiving me. Was that a compliment?”

“Do not be mistaken, it was simply an observation. Now pick up the pace,” she demanded, somehow maintaining a lady like demeanor and a brisk trot at the same time. Canterlot wasn’t a small city, and while Twilight expected Rarity to slow shortly after beginning, she kept the pace strong for a full hour before stopping outside of a less than reputable looking night club of sorts in one of the less traversed sections of the capitol.

“Is this really the place?” Twilight inquired, staring skeptically the sign, which read, “The Best Plot.” “This seems somewhat... outside your profession, don’t you think?”

“Just as you have had your secrets, so I have mine. Now, enough chit chat, we have a lot of work to do.” Seeing that it was a night club, Twilight wasn’t expected to see such a crowd as she followed Rarity down the stairs and into a room full of busy ponies bustling about.

“I have to say, Rarity, that I’m surprised that there’d be a fashion show in someplace like this. I mean, they couldn’t even remove the pole from center stage, what if one of the snobby models walks into it?” Rarity said nothing, continuing through the crowd and into the back room where Twilight was met with a sight no stallion would dream of being given free access to.

To call them “entertainer’s” would be putting it as civilly as possible. No fewer than twenty other mares, probably more, were getting primped, preened, and donning the most provocative and suggestive styles imaginable. For ponies who normally wear nothing unless there is some occasion, things such as saddles and garters were only worn for exotic occasions, and as Rarity strode in still dressed very much like a lady, Twilight posed her fateful inquiry even as a thrill of unwanted excitement raced through his body, leading to a rather uncomfortable shift in her nether regions. “Rarity, please tell I’m not... I’m not modeling...”

“Yes, Cerulean. Lingerie is the term you are looking for. What’s with that face,” she laughed, smiling maliciously as the realization of the coming event dawned upon Twilight full force. “Do not worry, you will outshine the rest of these ponies with my fabulous designs!”

“Rarity, I can’t believe you design saddles and the like too! And I don’t mean the working kind!”

“What, why is that so hard to believe? Your pole dancing skills weren’t half bad when you graced us with your display outside Sugarcube Corner, so I thought I’d try my hoof at it. I got more notice than was expected, and ended up here. And now you, my dear 'mare,' are going to rocket me to the top of the list.”

“Yeah, Rarity, that’s a great idea. I can only see one big, gaping hole in this crazy plan!” Twilight shouted back, aggravated by her glowing horn and anatomy that clearly thought its initial increase in size wasn’t enough.

“Oh? And what might that be, Cerulean? I highly doubt your sense of fashion is anywhere near as sophisticated as me, so what could you possibly have that I don’t?”

“This!” she shouted, lifting her hind leg. Rarity came a small squeal and turned her head away, blushing violently and giving Twilight some much relished satisfaction.

“Y-you’re right, that is a problem. You can’t just... keep it hidden?”

“Let me think for a moment... no, not a chance.” Expectations clashed with reality as Twilight was rewarded not with a dramatic wail, but a condemning smile.

“Come, Cerulean, I have a solution,” she declared triumphantly, grabbing one of her bags and leading Twilight back to a tidy bathroom, where Rarity bid her enter. Cerulean turned slowly to feel something soft and lacy hit him in the face before falling to the floor.

“Please tell me that’s not...”

“Strap it in tight, Cerulean. As of this moment, you’re a mare.”

If stallions were meant to ever experience the symptoms of childbirth, then they would have been born with the necessary equipment. They are not. Thus, Cerulean didn’t have the wherewithal to quite know how to cope with the crippling wave of contractions that suddenly wrenched him from a state of gluttony induced bliss to believing that he was being ripped apart from the inside by an evil entity residing within his womb.

“Oh Celestia, I’m gonna die! Make it stop!” At his sudden outburst, Spike came rushing to assist.

“Twilight, what is it, what’s wrong?”

“What’s wrong, I’ll aaaaaaah! I’ll tell you what’s wrong; I’m dying, that’s what!”

“Don’t you think that’s a little bit dramatic, Twilight?” Cerulean was too busy groaning to bother answering the ridiculous inquiry. The contractions only lasted for a minute or two, but they felt like forever. “Let me know if you actually need something, alright Twilight?”

“Yeah, yeah, now leave me alone to suffer.” Cerulean turned his attention to the beast within, knocking on the outside a few times before attempting to get the foal’s attention. “Hey, that hurts, you know that? I hope you’re proud of yourself.” He was being entirely sarcastic, of course, and expected to be kicked in return. Instead, the foal pressed two hooves gently against the wall of the womb and held the position for a moment as if to say “I’m sorry.” A sudden wave of sadness seemed to flood through Cerulean’s body, and he placed his hooves over the spot where two much smaller hooves were pressing, finally understanding how Twilight could justify going through such pain with a smile.

Just the sight of Cerulean waddling out of the bathroom, grimacing with each step, was enough of a reward to ease her grudge. Not that she would say anything, of course, she still needed his help to model her ravishing designs. Twilight, on her part, was making a mental checklist of all the spells she’d need in order to properly punish Rarity upon whenever she returned to her original body. Also, she was making another list alongside the first, noting all of the worst profanities and jibes she could muster.

“Cerulean, muttering under your breath like that is really not ladylike. Now, sit up straight so I can get to work on your mane.” Twilight flopped into the chair, expecting comfort but finding it extremely unpleasant giving the condition of her fiancé’s assets.

“Rarity, you are more devious than Discord, you know that?”

“Devious? I hardly think so. Cunning, perhaps, as any clever mare should be. If you’d really like to go back on your word and thus negate any chances you may have had at my approval, I suppose you can flee, thought given what you’re wearing... well, I don’t dare to think about what the rest of Canterlot would think.” Twilight shuddered, knowing that Cerulean’s already tarnished reputation would never, ever recover should she exit the building. “I didn’t think so.” Twilight wasn’t used to spending very much time on her mane, so having to sit for nearly an hour while Rarity worked her “magic” was about as entertaining and enjoyable as watching paint dry with a magnifying glass, at night, with a blindfold. Waving over to one of the staff for the event, she gave her detailed instructions for Twilight’s make up and stood aside as the mare went to work.

She finished as quickly as possible and moved on to the next mare, an irate pegasus with a soft cream colored coat and pink hair. Wait a second, is that...

“Fluttershy? Is that you?” Rarity gasped, stricken by the possibility. There was a sharp yelp as the mare fell over backwards, turning bright pink like her hair and staring over in horror as Rarity and a beautiful mare that looked an awful lot like Cerulean came over. “I don’t... but... how... why are you... what is going on, here?” Fluttershy, on her part, couldn’t find the words to speak, making unintelligible and nearly inaudible squeaking noises as her attempts at coherent communication failed.

“Oh, Fluttershy, you poor thing. You thought you’d be dancing, didn’t you?”

Wait, that voice... No, it couldn’t be, could it? “Ce... Cerulean?”

“Fluttershy, what happens here tonight stays between us three, agreed?” She nodded, unable to hide behind her highly stylized mane.

“You see, I, um, saw a flyer in Ponyville asking for models with dancing experience, and I thought it might be fun to see how I compared.”

“I’m proud of you, Fluttershy. You’ve really gotten more confident as of late,” Twilight encouraged, though the mare couldn’t blush any harder than she already was. Finally finding her voice, Rarity adopted a soft tone and approached.

“Fluttershy, dear, you don’t have to do this if you...”

“No, Rarity, I’m going to do it. I mean, I don’t really want to be seen like this... but I can’t spend my whole life hiding. I’m going to win this competition.”

“Well, I’m sorry, but you’re hardly a match for my fashion, and Cerulean has some experience dancing himself, for whatever reason.” It was rare that Fluttershy ever became competitive, but when the mare put her hoof down, it was on.

“Don’t get cocky, Rarity. I’ve been practicing for months, and I’m going to blow Cerulean out of the water! I mean, I hope to.”

“Challenge accepted, Fluttershy. Let’s both do our best,” Twilight encouraged, smiling within. There was no way the student could hope to outdance the teacher. It may have been a long time ago, but Twilight remembered every book she’d read on the subject, as well as the hours spent using the rather uncouth activity as a form of exercise, since it didn’t require leaving her room. A call came out over the speakers, warning that they had a mere fifteen minutes remaining.

“No, Cerulean. Um, prepare to lose,” she asserted, sitting back down in the chair and motioning for the mare to continue the touch up work on her make up.

“Cerulean, if you lose to Fluttershy, this whole endeavor is forfeit. Honestly, I cannot believe what is happening to Ponyville. You’re to blame, you know.”

“I see. I suppose that telling Storm he had to choose between love and fear was a bad thing as well. I mean, Rainbow Dash sure seems depressed, having him around,” Twilight replied, eliciting a gratifying look of surprise from the fashionista who was making sure everything was perfect. They both fell silent, each with their own thoughts. Twilight closed her eyes, blocking out the noise and visual stimulation to quiet her thoughts and empty her mind. The call to line up came and Twilight stood, steeling her determination to, at the very least, not give Rarity any more fuel for the fire.

“Win this, and I may hear what you have to say on the matter, Cerulean.”

“I intend to. There’s no way Fluttershy can beat her own teacher.”

“Wait, what?”

“Uh, nothing!” Deep, pulsing beats shook the floor as the show started. Twilight was to perform just after Fluttershy, who seemed to have abandoned stage fright completely, staring straight ahead and tapping her hoof in time with the music.

“Hey, Fluttershy? While Rarity may not be able to appreciate your change for what it is, I really meant it when I said I was proud of you. Sure, I never expected to find either of us like this, but I just wanted to say congratulations anyways. It’s a victory for you simply being here.”

“Thanks, Cerulean. I’m still going to win.”

“I wouldn’t forgive you if you went easy on me. Come on, Fluttershy, show me what you’ve learned. You’re next.”

“Twilight would be mad if she heard you talking to me like that,” she giggled, before becoming serious again as the preceding dancer made their way offstage to make way for Fluttershy. Putting one sure hoof in front of the other, the once timid pegasus swept onto the stage, shooting Twilight a wink and mouthing “bite me,” before going into her routine. Twilight was helpless to do anything but match Rarity’s breathless stare, not having ever seen Fluttershy dance before. Even were she a mare, Twilight would be hard pressed to match, or avoid the influence of, the visceral stimulation of seeing such a delicate flower undergo such a total transformation. As she let the music in, her limbs followed, and thunderous roars of approving whistles accompanied the cacophonous stomping of many hooves. Having fulfilled her allotted time, she cantered backstage, swaying her flanks as she went.

“Um, have fun trying to beat that, Cerulean,” she teased, grinning as Twilight forced air back into her lungs. However, rather than be impressed, Rarity had only been filled with an urge to destroy her career.

First, she becomes a model, and now she’s stealing the spotlight again? I simply will not stand for it! “Cerulean, destroy her.”

I don’t need your prompting, Rarity. I may have been embarrassed about it before, but this is war. Prepare to be dominated, Fluttershy. Setting her eyes forward and her horn provocatively aglow, she strode out onto the main stage with just as much confidence. Fluttershy’s sneer slowly melted into an open mouth of awe as Twilight dazzled the crowd, mixing Cerulean’s magic with her sensuous, fluid movements as taught to her by somepony who had perfected the art over a millenium in secret. As she drew the show to a close, she let forth a burst of snow that fluttered around, shining in the bright lights as she ran a hoof along the length of the horn and slowly brought it to her mouth.

“There are... no words...” Rarity started, staring in abject horror at the blue stallion that came sauntering backstage to await the results. “No words to describe my all consuming disgust and gut wrenching nausea at such a shameful display...”

“Rarity, I thought...”

“It was magnificent,” she said, dropping her voice to a growl. “There is no way anypony could top that.”

“Um, Rarity? You may want to, uh, take a couple minutes to calm down,” Twilight said, pointing to her horn which was happily emitting a soft, violet glow. The flustered mare immediately darted to the back while Fluttershy walked over.

“Cerulean, that was really... something.”

Oh Celestia, her wings... This is all kinds of strange. Ugh, Cerulean, your body is far too active, now I’m glowing and... Focus, focus! “I... learned from the best.”

“Yeah, Twilight taught me to, with that video.”

“No, I was talking about Princess Cel...” Oh no, I cannot let that slip. Wait, don’t they already know? Fluttershy was there when that happened...

“I wonder if she’d give me a lesson or two. I’ve watched that video a lot too, but there’s only so much you can learn from one performance.”

“Um... maybe? Anyways, Fluttershy, that was really impressive.”

“Thanks, Cerulean. Twilight’s really lucky to have somepony like you.” Forgetting herself for a moment, Twilight gave Fluttershy a well meaning embrace, but for somepony that had little to no physical contact of any kind with the opposite sex, the experience was nearly as stimulating as watching Cerulean dance. Twilight opened her eyes as she heard the mare’s wings, which had just managed to fold, shoot back open, and she immediately released her and took a few steps back.

“Cerulean, if you lay another hoof on her, I will personally send you back to Twilight in a casket. Are we understood?” Rarity said calmly, standing beside a furiously blushing Fluttershy. Twilight’s previous frustration with the mare came back, and were she under the influence of hormones like normal, punishment would have commenced then and there. Everypony in the back hushed as the announcer declared the unsuspecting winners.

“Fillies and gentlecolts, I am pleased to announce that two mares have outshone the rest. Fluttershy, clad in the style of ‘Nature’s Fury,” and Hoarfrost, in ‘Midnight Temptation!’”

“Hoarfrost? You’re despicable, Rarity.”

“Go on, Hoary, claim your prize,” the giddy mare snickered, watching as Fluttershy and Twilight strode back onto stage. Now that she wasn’t dancing, Fluttershy grew extremely uncomfortable with the leers and whistles being hurled her way by the crowd of excited ponies, mostly stallions who couldn’t care less about the fashion element. A single voice rose above the rest, causing Twilight and Fluttershy to freeze as it quickly became a thunderous chant shared by more than half the ponies in the room.

“Take it off!”

It didn’t take the foal’s sudden shift to alert Cerulean that something was wrong. It didn’t require a particularly potent bout of contractions, either, but those came along with it as his vision began to blur, becoming a murky haze that slowly faded to black. For an instant, he felt and saw nothing but black. Then, like being launched through a dark tunnel, distant noise seemed to come from a bright light that he was speeding towards with increasing velocity before snapping back to consciousness inside his own body. Except that it couldn’t be his body, as he was standing in front of a large crowd of less than reputable ponies and he was still a mare. A mare that, to be sure, shared his characteristics, but as he took a moment to give his body a good investigation, he came to a shocking realization. He was in lingerie. On a stage. Surrounded by sex crazed stallions.

“Oh, sweet Celestia, some dream this is,” he groaned, looking over at Fluttershy who was trying desperately to hide. Wait, if it’s a dream, then nothing matters! But I can’t just leave her like that... “Hey, everypony, you want me to take it off?” he shouted, raising his pitch in what was supposed to sound like a girly voice but more just came off as flamboyant. The frenzied ponies paid it no heed as their cries reach fever pitch. Cerulean ripped off his clothing, if it can even be called that, with a flourish, standing on his hind legs and placing his forehooves on his hips, striking a pose as a dead silence descended over the room, a singular reaction to what was being clearly displayed on stage. Looking down, he cursed his anatomy to high heaven as Fluttershy became the least of everypony’s concerns.

“Oh dear Celestia... this isn’t a dream. It’s a bucking nightmare.”