Day 28, November 18

I haven't been able to get any entries, because heart-breaking things have started happening to my Dash, it all started a day after her third human day, she had a REALLY horrible nightmare. She woke up instantly, screamed for a good 5 seconds, then spent 10 minutes crying. We shared a bed, now, and the night this happened, I knew it was her.

I jumped awake, and when I heard her scream, I knew something was wrong. I cried myself, laying down with her. Keeping her in a close hug, trying to calm her down after the scarring nightmares she has been having, I was hurt that she was suffering, but it was nothing compared to the nightmares she had been having.

She was remembering the emotional time we had when Fluttershy told me about her parents. She has been having nightmares about her parents, and she tells me she also has nightmares about me, too. The nightmares always ended with her parents and or me getting hurt, tortured, or murdered. The images of the two being tortured every night, me and her parents being killed or tortured have been giving her insomnia every night.

I had been sleeping at her side, calming her down so that she would not feel any stress at night. I just kept my arms around her, and I never even heard a sound, that was like music to my ears. Peace, for me, was to hear her happy. We fell asleep every night like that, and she doesn't have nightmares when she sleeps in my arms.

Last night was the most heart-breaking, and scarring nightmare that has come, yet. I was holding her in my arms, like normal, we fell asleep. It was 4:00...AM when I woke up to find her still awake in bed, she had red veins showing on the sides of her eyes, she had dried tears in her eyes, and she was REALLY tired. She told me the nightmare she had was discovered everything about her parents, only to find out that they had been murdered by a group.

In the dream, it seemed realistic enough that she thought she actually woke up. It was in the dream that I was beginning to hold her, but I was ripped right from her, and stabbed, and murdered by the same group that murdered her parents, but killed me right on the bed...right in front of her. I know that I would never want this to happen, but they didn't take Dash's life, too.

Just the though of Dash wanting someone to kill her, that she was even TALKING about killing herself made me start to cry, I told her I didn't EVER want her to tell anyone to kill her, or kill herslf.

But after four of the thugs killed me, they just threw my body against her, and she was asking them to kill her, too because she wanted to be with her parents and me. But all the thugs did was put her against the wall, and put cuts all over her, and whenever she would go to grab the knife, they would swipe the knife away. Then, would break whatever bone they could find in her body. The thought of this made me cry more.

When they were done, everything was broken but her neck, she was in A LOT of pain, but she couldn't end it. When she was done, I hugged her, and cried, saying I'm sorry I forgot, I won't ever forget to hold her again. I cried for a while before I calmed down, then carried her to the kitchen table. She had wings, but everything was too dangerous in her eyes. She couldn't move. I helped get breakfast in every way possible, but she wouldn't eat, she looked terrified, like the same thugs were going to take me away from her.

That wouldn't happen, but I felt sorry for her. My mom offered for her to stay home, but she didn't want me to be away from her, and she cried. I hugged her, and she calmed down. I know it wasn't all that I could do for her, but it was enough to let her know I was fine. I told my mom I would just stay home so we could rest, and she could calm down.
It kills me that she is hurting, but there’s nothing I can do. If I sneak away while she isn’t looking, she will have a heart attack. If she had a heart attack, I might lose her, and I would e to blame for her death.
I won’t write again until she recovers.