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The Puncake Adventure: WILDCAT In Equestria

by Pony With A Hat

Chapter 1: DO YOU WANT THE PUNCAKE!


DO YOU WANT THE PUNCAKE!

WildCat got out of bed and looked through his window, it was the middle of the afternoon but he didn't give a walrus turd. Anyway, he got dressed and got on his Xbox and popped in Black Cops, I mean Ops 2. He was playing a game of search and destroy when his game started lagging out. 'figures' he thought due to the fact that his internet wasn't all that great. He turned his head and a vortex was magically there. He stared for a second and though 'I'm gonna die'. He was then cast into the bowels of where ever the vortex lead.

He couldn't remember how long he was out but when he woke, he was butt naked, under a tree, and a pony. He starred at his hands that were once hooves in aw.

I mean. Hooves that were once hands in aw. "Son of a bitch..." He said loudly.

"I don't think you say those things, they're bad words." said a female voice from his left.

He saw a purple unicorn and started laughing.

"What's so funny?" she said in an irritated voice.

"I'm in a show! pffft, so what's your name Twilight Sprinkle?"

She stared at him with piercing eyes. "Something like that."

WILDCAT smiled and wiped a tear from his face. He wasn't happy with where he was but he sure was happy that he could make fun of these damn this and they can't shit because of 'the Y rating'. Twilight then proceeded to kick WildCat in the throat.

WildCat was astonished by Twilight's Chuck Norris abilities and the fact that he's still alive do to the fact that his throat would have crushed. For now on people would have to call him 'WILDCAT! THE GUY WHO SURVIVED GETTING KICKED IN THE THROAT BY A TECHNICOLORED HORSE! Also known as Puncake Man'.

"What was that for you somumabech!" He question her.

"You just looked so peaceful and I'm really good at neck hoof massages" Said Tina Turner, I mean John Wayne.

"WELL AT LEAST YOUR HONEST LETS GO MAKE SOME PUNCAKES!"

By the time they got to Twilight's kitchen a terrible secret was upon them. There was a Cthulhu living in the kitchen. WildCat looked at Twilight.

WildCat laughed "Holy Shit! You guys have National Japanese Tentacle Porn Day Here too! Awesome! HEY GIANT TENTACLE PORN GUY! WANT PUNCAKES

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