As she trotted through the streets of Ponyville, Applejack was continually stopped by well wishing friends. The more of them that stopped and spoke with her, the more she had to fight the urge to turn around and gallop as fast as she could back to the library. Most of the questions and comments followed the same pattern. “How are you feeling?” “Does anything seem familiar yet? “How is Twilight?” “Bet you can’t wait to get back to the farm.” “From what we hear the farm can’t wait for you to get back to it. *chuckle chuckle*” “Have you visited it yet?” “The sow is getting ready to have her new litter of pigs, they’ll certainly need you for that.” “I heard that one of the cows was sick, I hope she’s getting better...”

Suddenly a Rainbow colored streak shot by, soared up and landed next to Applejack.

“Hey AJ, what’s shak-”

Applejack was frantic “Oh Rainbow Dash, I’m so glad to see you, you’ve got to get me out of here! Please! I don’t know-”

“Woah, woah, woah there AJ, just chill out farm girl.”

“DON’T say farm!! Please! I don’t ever want to hear that word again! I ain’t goin there, I don’t know anything about it and I don’t want to learn! I just wish everypony would shut up about Sweet Apple Acres! I ain’t never been there and I, I HATE it!!”

Rainbow Dash went straight to her side and spoke calmly and quietly, “It’s okay, it’s okay AJ, just follow me over here. Apple Bloom, Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle are sledding. They’re looking for you. Come on.”

The two ponies trotted quickly over to the hill past the school. Rainbow Dash looked over at AJ and was shocked at the panic she saw in her friend’s eyes. Applejack started trotting faster, picking up speed, getting ready to break into a gallop out of blind fear. Suddenly there was a shadow overhead. A smiling Twilight landed just in front of them. It was all Applejack could stand and she ran right for Twilight. Seeing the fear in those green eyes, Twilight instantly opened her arms. Applejack didn’t need any more than that, she ran straight into them and burst into tears. Twilight held her close and whispered, “It’s okay, it’s okay AJ, just calm down.”

Rainbow Dash’s jaw slowly fell open. “Uh, AJ, you okay?” she said, her face reflecting both confusion and and concern at the sight of her two friends embracing.

“What happened Dash? Why is she so upset?”

“I don’t know. I guess the ponies in town kept asking her about the farm or something. She started to really freak out. She said she hated Sweet Apple Acres and never wanted to go there, ” Dash sounded desperate.

“You have to remember Rainbow,” Twilight explained “to Applejack, this whole place is very strange. She doesn’t know anypony except for a few of us. She’s used to having me around and it’s still a little scary being out on her own.”

Apple Bloom, Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo had seen Twilight flying by and started walking toward where she landed. Twilight looked over Applejack’s shoulder at the three ponies, who were slowly walking toward them, pulling their sleds behind. Their expressions, like Rainbow Dash’s showed confusion.

Twilight whispered in Applejack’s ear, “The fillies are coming over, you need to let go of me.”

“I don’t care anymore Twilight,” she said,her voice a strained, crying whisper, “I don’t care who knows, What am I going to do about the farm? Somepony told me there are sick animals over there. I don't know a thing about sick animals and how to make them well!”

Twilight saw her chance. She spoke aloud, her tone was that of a friend giving advice. “It’s okay AJ, we will all help you at the farm. The ponies in town don’t know you’re having trouble remembering. You can learn all that you need to know, I also spoke with Dr. Stable about you and your amnesia. He said that you might still have minor swelling and that once it goes all the way down, your other memories will come back. Just be a little more patient.” Twilight, still holding Applejack, patted her on the back with reassurance rather than affection. Just being held by Twilight had relaxed Applejack and she stepped back, wiping her eyes and her nose.

Rainbow Dash walked up and put her arm around the earth pony. Applejack returned the embrace with both arms, “Thank you so much Dash, you really rescued me back there, sorry I was so crazy.” she embraced her friend. At first Dash’s eyes flew open wide at the power of the hug, but quickly changed to a smile as she beamed with pure happiness at being able to comfort her best friend. She returned the hug.

“Ain’t no thang AJ, and like Twi said, we’ll all be there at the farm all the time to help you out until you get the rest of your memory back. But then I’ll expect you to pay me back in cider.” The two gave each other another tight squeeze and stepped back, with a chuckle.

She looked at Applejack affectionately and smiled, “You’re like my best friend, you think I’m going to ditch you? I’ve got like the worst patience around, but you don’t see me freaking out that you don’t have your memory back yet. Just chill girl, we’re all here for you.”

“Hey, can we get in on a hug too?” Apple Bloom asked. Applejack knelt down and the three little filles rushed to her and hugged her tight.

Dash walked over and stood beside Twilight. Still looking at her best friend and the fillies in their big group hug, Dash leaned over and whispered to Twilight “Did the doc really say that? Are we really going to get Applejack back?”

Twilight smiled and nodded. “He thinks so.”

“Good, ‘cause remember what Fluttershy said back at Dodge Junction?”

“About how losing AJ would leave a hole in our hearts?”

“Yeah. Well the hole in my heart is killing me Twi.”

Twilight turned to look at Dash. Her smile faded at the sight of the tears in the Rainbow’s magenta eyes. Dash made no attempt to hide it. As she spoke, her voice started to break.

“I-I gotta jet. I think I’m going to lose it and I don’t want Scootaloo to see me.”

Before Twilight could open her mouth, Dash shot up into the air and was gone.

A minute or so later AJ looked over. “Hey, where’d Dash go?”

“Oh, she had to take care of something. Want to do some sledding?”

The fillies cheered and Applejack shrugged. “Sounds like fun. Let’s go.”

The five of them went to the top of the hill with the sleds. Applejack looked down the long steep hill and swallowed hard. “Are we supposed to go down that? On these?”

“Sure sis! Just watch me!” Apple Bloom held her sled in front of her and ran forward. She threw the sled on the ground and jumped belly first on it. Applejack watched her go and smiled, hearing the little filly screaming all the way down the hill in delight. The other two Crusaders were right behind.

“Hey AJ! Hey Twilight!” It was Lyra Heartstrings and Bon Bon coming up the hill dragging sleds behind them. Twilight looked at them, and was unable to prevent a certain image from forming in her mind, which made her blush. But she also noticed the loving looks they gave each other. She’d always thought it was happiness, but now she saw it for what it was - love.

“Do you two want to borrow our sleds? We’re taking a break.” Bon Bon asked.

“Yeah, a break.” Lyra echoed, clearly out of breath. She sat down hard in the snow. Bon Bon went over to her and they rubbed muzzles.

“You all tuckered out sweetie? How about some hot chocolate at Sugarcube Corner?”

Twilight looked at AJ to see if the word registered with her, but if it did she showed no sign of it.

“I would love that BB. I’d even get up for it.” Lyra said as she stood up. “You two go for a few runs. The hill is great. Here, you can use our sleds”

“Thanks Lyra, that’s really nice of you!” Twilight said “You up for it AJ?”

Applejack smiled. “If you're a-goin’ I’ll be right behind you!”

In the next moments the two ponies were sledding down the hill side by side. Twilight was using her magic to keep either of them from pulling ahead and they looked back and forth at each other in pure joy. She didn’t tell Applejack, the moment seemed too special. After a few runs they got in sync with the fillies and all five went down the hill side by side, hooting and hollering.

“Hey AJ, what do you say we do a little shopping?”

The five of them stood at the top of the hill. The fillies wanted to go down again but Lyra and Bon Bon were back and Twilight and AJ were pretty worn out.

“Sure Twi. What ‘ya have in mind?”

“Oh I don’t know. Maybe some window shopping…”

“But we got plenty of windows back at home” the earth pony kidded.

Twilight would have laughed, but hearing Applejack refer to the library as her home had caught the alicorn off guard. The look on her face as she gazed at her love left no mistake as to her thoughts. The Crusaders had already started down the hill, but Lyra and Bon Bon were still there. They looked at each other and smiled.

“Love” Bon Bon said with a smile.

“Who, oh us? No no no no.” The two ponies said and laughed unconvincingly.

“Oh!” Lyra blurted out.

“Shhhh!!” Bon Bon said. “They obviously aren’t or they would have said something, right girls?”

Twilight looked at Bon Bon and smiled shyly. “Yes, we would have.”

“See Lye’s? They would have said something. Now let’s hit the hill! First one down is a rotten hayburger!”

With that Lyra was off and on her way down the hill.

“Don’t worry, she’ll figure it out before she gets down there. Well since you two are not in love, then I won’t tell you how I love you two and that it’s the perfect pairing. I won’t tell you that you just made my week and that if you ever want to talk about being, you know, like that, we’re here for you when you’re ready. I’m so not thrilled that you’re not madly in love with each other.” Bon Bon gave each of them a hug and a kiss on the side of their muzzles. .

“Thank for understanding Bon Bon. If we ever do fall in love, we’ll come right over and tell you in person.”

“Okay guys, see you later.” Bon Bon said and took off down the hill on her sled.

Twilight and Applejack strolled through Ponyville looking at the shops and talking. Whenever anypony approached and started to talk to Applejack, Twilight would interrupt and tell them about Rarity and Spike.

“Hey, let’s go in here.” Twilight suggested.

“The jewelry store? Okay, I guess so”

At the two of them entered the store, the little brass bell over the door jingled, announcing their entrance. The store was empty. The two ponies looked through the glass cases at the earrings and necklaces, the hoof studs the mane combs and the tail combs.

“Hey AJ, have a look at these!”

Lying in a glass case on a deep green velvet display pad were two necklaces. The chain was fine gold and hanging from each of them was a tiny gold heart shaped apple. Each had a small stem with a single leaf. Embedded in the leaf of one of them was a tiny emerald, in the leaf of the other was a deep purple sapphire. Applejack gasped. She gazed longingly into the case, utterly enchanted. Her voice was dreamy.

“Oh Twilight, they’re so beautiful! Oh they’re just... And look at the gems!”

“M-hmm” Twilight agreed.

“And look - they’re just like our eyes!” She said, excitedly, turning to Twilight “Isn’t that…” but she didn’t finish the sentence. Twilight was looking at her, not at the necklaces. Her eyes were brimming with tears.

“Do you really like them?” the young alicorn asked, and as she blinked, a tear spilled from her eye.

“Oh Twilight, they're the most beautiful things I’ve ever seen. How did you…? Did you…?”

“M-hmm”

Twilight was smiling as her chin trembled and as she nodded another tear spilled from her eye.

Applejack’s eyes were suddenly wet with tears. She whispered “Oh sweetie, they’re just, I…” she threw her arms around Twilight and the two hugged each other.

An old unicorn mare, smiling and wiping her eyes with a tissue came out from the back of the store. She was smiling at the two of them and offered a box of tissues that she’d been carrying in her orange levitation spell

“You certainly know your friends tastes Twilight Sparkle.” the shop owner said, smiling and wiping away a tear. “That was a very sweet gift you designed, you know, for a close friend. Oh, I think I hear something in the back, will you two friends excuse me?”

Twilight and Applejack were staring into each other’s eyes. Without looking away they both nodded.

“Thank you Gemma” Twilight said, still gazing into Applejack’s deep green eyes..

“You’re very welcome sweetie. Now I’ll just go see what that thing in the back is…” Gemma smiled and her eyes sparkled. The venetian blinds in the front window of the shop and over the window in the shop’s door, were now surrounded by an orange spell, and suddenly they slanted upwards, closing out the bright light and leaving the inside of the store in soft shadows. Applejack and Twilight both blushed deeply and looked toward Gemma, but she’d disappeared into the back of the shop.

Applejack looked back at Twilight, for a moment, then her ever-present hat fell off her head as she pulled the lavender wide-eyed, pony to her, kissing her deeply and passionately. The two embraced and continued to kiss. Finally their lips parted and they looked at each other, still safe in their embrace..

Applejack looked into Twilight’s still teary eyes.and spoke tenderly to her “I don’t remember a thing that happened before a week and a half ago Twilight Sparkle, but I know that in my life, I’ve never loved anypony, anyone or anything as much as I love you. I couldn't have”

As the two ponies looked at each other, the two necklaces, encased in an orange spell, floated out from inside the case, then around and down over their heads.

“You know that deep lavender sapphire just lights up against the green of your eyes.”

“That’s funny, I was going to tell you how the light hitting the emerald just dances when it’s near your lavender eyes.”

The two ponies nuzzled.

Suddenly the cash register jangled. AJ and Twi turned around. The “$0” tab was sticking up in the register’s window, but nopony was there, only the orange glow around the machine.

________________________________________

The late afternoon sun was a beautiful shade of orange. The icy cold weather had condensed the moisture high up in the air to fine crystals that caught the winter light and turned the sky into a deep blue.

“Can we go home now Twi? I’m real tuckered out.”

“Sure. The girls said they were going to Scootaloo’s house after they were done sledding.”

“That’s good, cause I just wanna sit down.”

Derpy flew up overhead and landed next to Twilight.

“Hey Twilight, hey AJ, nice necklaces! They are really beautiful.”

“Thank you Derpy, that’s a might kind of you to notice.”

“You’re welcome Applejack. Twilight, Dr Stable asked if you could stop by his office, He has a patient and he’s got a problem that you helped with last summer.”

“Sure, tell him I’ll be there in a second. Do you want to come with me?”

“Nah, I’m just too tired. You fly on over and I’ll see you back home.”

“I just love to hear you say that.”

“Home?”

“eYup”

“Good, cause I like sayin it.”

-------------------------------------------------------------------

“Twilight, we need to talk.”

Twilight sat down on the cushion in Dr. Stable’s office. She looked down at the floor, her ears folded flat.

“I hate those words in that order. The Princess always said that when I was in trouble,” she paused, still looking at the floor, “now I feel like I’m going to throw up.” Twilight looked up. The doctor instantly sensed her fear. He knew the look in her eyes from the previous summer when she’d come to the realization that a patient would die or be maimed for life.

“Please don’t tell me I can’t do this, because I can and I am ready for it. You saw what I did with those little blood vessels - I did twelve without a single problem!”

“Calm down, no, it has nothing to do with your ability with the procedure, sweetheart. It’s something else, something we need to talk about before you go ahead with this.”

“What? The risks? We already talked about them - I know there are risks.” Her ears perked up “Is that all?” The relief in her voice was evident.

“No, it’s something else. Have you thought about what will happen afterwards? Once she wakes up?”

“Oh, that. Sure, I know - it’s going to be very confusing as all those memories are suddenly there and they have to reconcile with what has happened. It won’t be easy.”

“Yes, that will be a big part of it. The biggest will be adjusting to her newfound love for you. It’s a very deep and intense relationship you two have and that may be very difficult for her. She may be angry with you and feel that you took advantage of her, she may be repulsed by the physical part of the relationship, or maybe she’s been in love with you all along and she’ll have the same epiphany you had when she was hurt. Perhaps the ‘new’ AJ has done some things that may shock the ‘old’ AJ.”

“Whatever it is I’ll be there for her and I’ll help her get through it. I can’t worry about her hating me and thinking that I took advantage of her. I know I just have to show her how much I love her, it’s all I can do.”

“There is something else we need to talk about. There are four possible outcomes, I mean, provided you don’t kill her.”

“Please don’t joke about this, you’ve got me really scared now”

“Okay, I’m sorry. We both know that’s extremely unlikely.” He paused and looked at Twilight.

“Are you okay Twilight? I’m sorry honey, I was only kidding.”

“Um, no it’s okay, I’m fine.”

“The first case, which is extremely unlikely, is that she is stuck with complete and total amnesia. Her mind is blank and she remembers nothing. If I thought there were any real chance of that I’d never let you proceed. It’s more likely that she’d sprout wings and fly.”

Twilight looked at him with a raised eyebrow.

“Ohh, yeah, right... Okay, bad example. Both your research as well as mine has shown that is no more than a .5% chance of occurring. The second possible outcome is that there is no change. She stays as she is now, with some memories gradually coming back to her. Obviously in that case what you’re repairing wasn’t linked to her memory loss.”

“I don’t think that’s likely, in fact I don’t think that’s likely at all.” Twilight observed with some insistence, “It doesn’t make any sense – after all we’re making a change to an area that contains memories. That means that her memories will change. To think that there will be no change is kind of, well, unlikely.” Twilight tried to sound convincing. “Wouldn’t you say?” It came out sounding like a statement more than a question.

“Well, from what little we know about the brain I couldn’t say for sure, but it does make sense. So, that brings us to the third possibility - that she has both her pre- and post-accident memories. That is the most ideal, obviously, but also the most challenging. We’ll still have to deal with the confusion, but as you said, you’ll be there for her and will do whatever is necessary to help her get through it and it will be built on solid ground.”

Twilight turned around, she was smiling now. “That is the most likely scenario. After all we’re removing what’s blocking her old memories. Once that’s done, she’ll be fine, we just have to give her lots of love and time and patience and help her understand. I know I can do that. I can stay at the farm with her...” Twilight continued.

“Then there is the fourth possibility,” the doctor interrupted, “Her memory stops at the point of the accident. Everything that she has experienced since then is gone. It will be as if she woke up shortly after the bookcase falling on her.”

“…and with her family and me together, not to mention Dash, Pinkie, Fluttershy, and of course Rarity and Spike, when they…” she continued.

“Twilight?” the doctor paused. “Did you hear what I said?”

“YES!” She turned on him, “and THAT will NOT happen!” she snarled, “I WILL NOT LET THAT HAPPEN!”

“Twilight, please, you have to face this. It is a possibility. We don’t know the state of her blood vessels when she was injured. Perhaps neither of the aneurysms was there, perhaps one perhaps…”

“Oh will you STOP?!” She screamed to the sky, “Perhaps, perhaps perhaps. Perhaps she will be fine, did you ever think of that?!!” she snapped, her voice full of anger and frustration. She turned and faced the doctor, her voice breaking-
“Perhaps she will wake up and the old and new will be together and she’ll UNDERSTAND THAT I LOVE HER AND SHE LOVES ME AND THAT’S ALL THAT REALLY MATTERS!!”

She stood there, teeth gritted, tears spilling from her eyes. The sides of her chest heaved in and out and her nostrils flared as she panted hard. She glared at the doctor and involuntarily pawed the ground once as though she were hoping for a challenge, for an excuse to unleash her fury on something…anything. But he just stood there, aching for her, wishing he could offer some sort of guarantee.. In her eyes he saw the anger give way to pain and fear but her face held strong. He could see the jaw muscles flex in her cheeks as she worked to choke back a sob that threatened to shatter her brave front. She took a deep breath and spoke a few halting words, working hard to keep from succumbing to her fear.

“I-I WILL NOT LET THIS HAPPEN AGAIN! …not a second time…” Her voice sounded strange. She turned away from him and stared out the window, defiant. The doctor walked up beside her, to calm her. She did not turn around or acknowledge him. He put his hoof on her shoulder but she shook it off violently.

“STOP IT!! I am tired of being comforted! I am damn sick and tired of having to be comforted!” She snapped her head around and stared at him. He went pale seeing the rage in her eyes and took a step back. “You should be afraid.” Twilight’s voice was dark. Then suddenly it was gone. The anger, the frustration, the fire. Her ears went down and she looked away. He could see her contemplating her life without the pony she loved most in the world.

“I-I’m sorry,” her voice was barely audible.

In all the time that she’d worked for him, all the tragedy they’d faced together, he’d never seen this much fear in her eyes.

He recalled a time that a family had rushed in with their little colt in who’d fallen in the lake...

He’d never had a chance. She and the doctor had done everything possible to save the little fellow, but he’d taken in too much water. Twilight had kept her composure but could not stop her tears nor could she stop stroking his little mane and talking soothingly and quietly to his lifeless body. Then she went out with the doctor to tell the family. Usually the assistants stayed in the back to “clean up,” not wanting to face the inevitable anguish of the grieving family. Not Twilight. Never. She sat and spoke with them and cried with them helped them get through the initial news. Then she would visit them periodically to make sure they were okay. In the months that followed she would pick up their little filly and bring her to the library so as to give the parents some alone time.

The two of them had trotted directly to the library after leaving their ob-gyn’s office a few months later. They were determined that Twilight would be the first to know-the mom was going to have a foal, a colt, and his name would be Morning Light.

“She doesn’t know anything about this, does she? You haven’t told her, you haven’t discussed what might happen.”

“I couldn’t, you know that.”

“You’ve known this since the minute you contemplated it.”

Twilight sat looking at the floor. She nodded her head slowly.

“Twilight, honey, as we discussed, once you finish weaving the lattice you should check it before drawing it closed. You just might see that it would cause problems you hadn’t anticipated. If you just left the lattice in place it would remove the risk of an arterial rupture and hemorrhage without affecting her memory. She’s completely out of danger and her memory stays as it is. Then you would go on as you are. You could work with her, the two of you could figure out how to run the farm together. Do you understand what I’m saying?”

There it was. The out, a legitimate out. A way to leave things as they are while removing the physical risks. After that they could find a way to work through the emotional and personal challenges that went with it.

He could see that the news was no surprise to her and he almost wished he hadn’t said it. He knew Twilight would never just leave it, that she had to do whatever she could to give Apple Bloom her big sister back, to give Big Mac his little sister back, and Granny Smith her granddaughter back. To return to Sweet Apple Acres their daughter and caretaker, their Applejack, whole, safe and sound.

“Thank you, and yes, I understand what you’re saying. But I have to do what is best for everypony and that’s what makes this a kind of test, and I know that my heart knows it’s the right thing to do,” she recited. She looked at him sadly, she wanted to show him that she’d put the matter to rest.

He suffered just watching how valiantly she fought the rising emotions. He wanted to demonstrate his faith in her by staying back, but he was unable to. He went to her, sat down and put his arm around her. He could feel the little sobs that shook her body, could see her working hard as she fought to hold everything back. Finally she turned and looked at him with so much pain in her eyes that he instinctively put his other arm around her and pulled her to him holding her head to his chest in a protective gesture. She managed to draw in a shaky breath.

“All my studies, all my tests, everything I’ve learned in all my books tell me that my heart knows that it’s the right thing to do.” As he felt her nod her head in confirmation to herself, he thought his heart would break. Twilight Sparkle, always dutifully obedient.

Now she started to shake uncontrollably, trying to hold back the sob, but at last, overcome, she gave up and let the tears that had filled her eyes spill down her cheeks. Just barely able to speak she said the words that to her meant that she’d failed the test.
She lowered her gaze and shook her head almost imperceptibly. Her voice was barely a whisper.

“But it’s not what my heart wants.”

He held her to his chest, gently caressing her mane as she cried.

Her voice trembled as she fought to regain control of her emotions.. “I’m so scared doctor, what if she does forget? If she wakes up and it’s all gone? She’ll never get them back. You’ve read those papers. Remember that stallion in Fillydelphia? He was like AJ, he lost all his memory after.”

“But honey that was just one case. You have to remember that, out of so many others, he was the only one.”

She looked up at him saying what she had been unwilling to think about, until now. Her eyes were haunting, pleading with him for an answer.

“But after they took out that piece of bone 2 years later it was like those 2 years never happened” she said, her voice trembling.. “He woke up from the surgery and everything was back, except for those two years. Even after 10 years he still doesn’t remember a single moment of that time.”

A single sob escaped her, then another, quieter one. She spoke softly. “Then what? What would I do? I’d love her, I mean I do love Applejack, and I’m in love with Applejack, but I don’t know if I’d have the courage to tell her again. And even if I did, it would be unfair to her. Every time I saw her, I’d search in her eyes for the pony who came into my life and held me and kissed me and healed that part of my heart I never tell anypony about. Not even the princess.”

Her chin quivered and she blinked, tears spilling from her eyes. Her voice trembled.

“She was so scared doctor, when she first woke up she was terrified, you should have seen her, it was awful. I showed her she could trust me, to believe in me and to love me and she showed me that everypony at the academy was wrong, that I could have somepony fall in love with me. I’m not just some loser or geek or dork, that I am a good pony and that I’m more than just some obsessive compulsive brainy freak.”

Hearing herself say the words that she’s heard classmates mutter when they thought she couldn’t hear and later openly call her, brought back all the pain that Applejack had helped exorcise. It was too much and now she broke down, sobbing, holding her face in her hooves. The doctor held her and continued to stroke her mane. A tissue materialized and she blew her nose. After a little while she drew another shaky breath and looked up at him.

“And then a little at a time she’ll slip away. Each time I see Applejack, the other pony will fade a little and then one day I won’t remember her at all. I won’t remember how my name sounded when she said it, how she made it so loved, so beautiful.” Twilight’s voice was full of pain.

“And that day she’ll be gone. I won’t remember her. The only pony that ever knew her and who loved her more than anything, will have forgotten who she was.I loved Applejack before she was hurt, with all my heart. I know that, and I will try to tell her, but I just don’t know if I’ll be able to.”

The tears had stopped and Twilight was quiet. Her thoughts were distant. Doctor Stable looked in her eyes and suddenly saw something there he’d never seen before, something he’d never even known was there and the sight of it brought him pain.
It was loneliness. While working with him she’d shared some of her memories of growing up in Canterlot, at the academy. But her remembrances hadn’t been emotional, they’d been more contemplative. What he saw now brought pain to him and reminded him of the few times she’d shared some of what she’d gone through at the academy.

It was the face of a little pony who had grown up without friends. With just teachers, an older brother, a foalsitter and a mentor, all of whom loved her but could never really be her friend. Her spirit and heart held on, believing that one day she would find other ponies who would not ignore her or tease her or trick her with cruelty, but would be her friends and would love her, true friends who would see all the lonely places in her heart and maybe heal them. Friends who would see that she didn’t think she was anything special just because she was good at magic. But until that time she would fill the lonely places with books and learning, two things she would come to love.

Then she spoke. It was the voice of a small frightened lonely filly, and the sound of it broke his heart

“And then, if, you know, it does happen, what will happen to that pony? Where will she go? Nopony will ever know her, only me and she is a wonderful loving pony, doctor. She is Applejack but she is somepony else too.” Twilight’s voice became protective, defending them both. “She is my friend and she is my love. She trusts me and loves me more than anypony will ever know.” She looked at the floor. “More than I could ever deserve.”

She sniffed, “Have you seen her paintings, her drawings?” She turned towards the doctor, her eyes puffy and red, her cheeks wet and matted with tears. There was so much pain in her voice but she wasn’t crying, she was grieving and the doctor found it agonizing to see her like this. She looked into his eyes as if begging him to understand her pain, desperately trying to make a case for her love and why she shouldn’t be taken from her.

More than anything, he wanted to repeat that she didn’t have to do this. Nopony even knew about it. She could leave everything as it was, fix the arterial wall structure without drawing it in. The pressure on the brain was not life threatening. They could get married and live at Sweet Apple Acres with Applebloom, Mac and Granny Smith. Two of them could learn how to run the farm together. Then he realized it was what he wanted. He loved them both and the idea that they were together in love made his world a much better place.

He’d seen more than his share of tragedy, Moms or Dads dying, leaving little ones, parents having to bury their little filly or colt. So much that made him question the point of life, and ask why there was so much pain. But then he would come across somepony like his wife and they would have a beautiful little filly. And he would see something like these two ponies and their love for each other and these things sat on the other side of the scale from tragedy. It might never outweigh all the sadness and suffering, but at least in his world he knew there was something there.

Something bothered him, this wasn’t like her. Twilight Sparkle was positive and assured. She forged ahead with confidence that everything would be okay. Now he understood why she didn’t discuss this with him or ask him about it.

It was because she’d always known. The moment she envisioned this procedure and what the outcomes could be, she’d been thinking about this. If everything was fine, then this would be washed away in the celebration, but if not, then she knew there wouldn’t be time for this. Nopony would understand, nopony knew, and Twilight would grieve alone. She couldn’t turn to her friends, or Celestia. ...or the one pony that she would have and always did in the past.

There would be nopony left for counsel, Big Mac would know immediately that something was wrong, as would the rest of the Mane Six and she could never face that. The doctor looked at her as though he’d read her thoughts.

“What about Spike? And Owlicious?”

“Spike’s growing up now.” She sniffed “Rarity was hired by a major designer. Spike even has his own number one assistant, did I tell you?.” She sniffed again and smiled. “I hope she’s half as good as Spike was for me. In any case he won’t be back for a few months.” She looked up at the doctor with a sad little smile. “He sounds really happy. Y-you should read his last letter.” She looked down again. “I’m so proud of him. I’d ask Fluttershy to take care of Owlicious. I don’t mean to dump all this on you doctor, and I know this will work, but I had to tell somepony. Somepony who would understand…if this impossible thing happens,”

She looked up at the ceiling and blinked to clear the tears from her eyes, trying to once again regain control of her emotions. “That one pony in this town that I love will understand, I need to know that so that I can keep my head during the procedure. It’s like writing a will, you know? If I do all this everything is going to be just fine. I have all this worry and stress and as Rarity has told me on more than one occasion it’s good for to be a drama queen once in a while.” She laughed and it felt good.

“I know sweetheart. And you’ve really thought this through, as you always do, but it’s going to be fine. Every story needs a little drama and it’s good to talk about it just to draw the worst possible scenario out into the open and shine the light of day on it, like some kind of black bile or poison. The stress relief from crying is good for you, but from what I’ve seen you do, you are not going to have any problems and I’m sure we’ll be celebrating once this is all done.”

She looked up at him through teary eyes, and smiled. “I know we will too.”

_________________________________________________

On her way back from Dr. Stables office, Twilight stopped at Sugarcube Corner and bought two muffins, one apple cinnamon and one blueberry.

She took her boots off after closing the door to the library and holding the bag from the bakery in her mouth, flew up to the landing. As she lit there she heard it - music coming from a guitar...or maybe 2?

Please don’t let that be Noteworthy, oh please oh please oh pleeeease!!

Twilight quietly went up the steps from the landing and paused. Then she steeled herself and keeping herself hidden followed the perimeter of the room. She softly walked to the bottom of the stairs that led up to the loft and stood there, remaining as silent as she could. She pictured Applejack sitting on the bed facing the window, her back to the stairs as she always did when playing..

Twilight’s heart pounded in her ears, in fear that she would hear that second guitar of Noteworthy’s. After a few moments she no longer cared. The music she was hearing was about her heart, as if it had been laid bare for everypony to see and a song had been written from all that was there. Twilight had taken several steps up to the to the loft, but now felt her knees become unsteady and sat down without realizing it. The emotions that rushed into her took away her ability to control what she felt. She looked up and saw Applejack as she’d pictured her, her back to Twilight, sitting on the bed and facing the window. The sun spilled around the edges of her mane, creating the effect of a golden halo. The sight of it proved almost too much to bear and she looked away. After a moment she found she was looking at something down in the living room, the folder she’d stuck in the bookshelf, away from prying filly eyes. She knew all the artwork it held

All of Applejack’s sketches, paintings and drawings. She knew it as well as she knew her own heart, as well as she knew Applejack’s eyes. Twilight suddenly realized that Applejack had just finished making the last slight changes to the song. She heard her take a deep breath and knew that she was about to hear the whole song, played beginning to end for the first time. Using her magic Twilight brought the folder over, but as she heard the opening notes, the young pony knew she didn’t need to look at them to see them, she only had to close her eyes.

Applejack's Gift to Twilight

If the melody had described Twilight’s heart, the words were a poem of Applejack’s love for her and as she heard them her heart began to ache at the depth of that love and all that Twilight meant to her. There was no magic, no power on earth that was its equal. She would have given anything at that moment to have been able to tell Applejack how deeply she had touched her soul.

As the song drew close to its end, Twilight sat there, the pictures clutched to her chest and her head bent protectively over them as the tears spilled from her eyes. She found the courage to look up and at that moment Applejack, just about to sing the last two lines of the song, turned and looked back at her, eyes wet with tears. In a voice that trembled with emotion, she barely finished the song. As the last notes from the guitar faded, neither of them moved, everything they meant to each other written on their faces. Then feeling as though her heart were about to burst, Twilight cried out and was up, galloping up the stairs. With a little cry Applejack jumped off the bed and started toward her. They took each other into their arms and through their tears, held each other and kissed.

Neither would let go. Twilight bathed them in magic and slowly and gently took them up into the air, turning them gracefully as though in a dance in the shaft of sunlight that streamed through the window. They broke the kiss and looked into each others smiling, tear filled eyes. Then, as the two embraced, resting their heads on the others shoulder, Twilight tenderly laid the two of them down, side by side on the fluffy, soft downy couch before the roaring fire in the fireplace..

Author's Notes:

This was always their song. I was in my car on the way home last summer thinking about the story and it came on the radio. I'd never heard it, but when those first three words "I can feel the magic floating in the air..."
By the end of the song I was an absolute mess.