"You're sure?" Applejack asked Twilight for what she knew had to be the fifteenth or sixteenth time that day, but, well, it was the day, wasn't it? In four hours, her and Fluttershy'd be standing in fronta fam'ly and friends with Twilight adding all the words and magic and whatnot to make it official.

Sweet Mother of Mercy...

"Applejack?" A purple hoof was waving back and forth in front of her, and she blinked, stared, found herself looking into Twilight's concerned face. "If you want to stay here, it's OK," Twilight said. "I'll be fine doing this by myself, and—"

"No!" The word came out way more strident than she wanted, and she quickly fished a smile from someplace to slap across her snout. "I wanna go with you." Settling back with a thump onto the wooden floor of her bedroom, AJ thought of something that made the smile take root and become more real. "Besides, trying to do nothing while knowing my honeycomb's across the way slipping into that mouth-watering dress?" She shuddered. "I wouldn't hardly be responsible for my actions."

Rarity, fiddling with the collar of AJ's white jacket—though it looked completely and absolutely perfect to Applejack's eyes—gave a giggle. "Oh, now, surely you don't subscribe to the notion that it's bad luck to see the bride before the wedding."

Only about half-joking, AJ folded her front legs across her chest and glared at her friend. "How many old mares' tales we seen come true the past couple years? No, ma'am! Day like today, I ain't taking one single chance." She nodded to Twilight. "So, sooner we get going, sooner we'll be back."

"OK!" The glow of her horn pulled a piece of parchment from her saddlebag. "I've made a map of our entire route, so if we take it easy—maybe a hundred miles each teleport—we'll get to the west coast in approximately half an hour."

"You're sure?" Applejack asked before she could stop herself. "Dag nabbit! Of course you're sure. You're Twilight Sparkle, ain'tcha? You been plotting this whole thing for nigh onto a week now!"

Twilight cleared her throat. "Two-and-a-half weeks, actually." Her wings unfurled partway, and Applejack had to grin at the spicy scent of her excitement. "This'll be the first time I've really pushed my powers since the coronation; I can hardly wait to see how they've grown!"

This time, AJ managed to bite down on that ding-dang question and asked instead, "You ain't gonna get too fancy, are you? 'Cause my pappy, no way he's used to magic and princesses and all like that." It still shook her a mite to just up and talk about Red Gravenstein, but it made her all warm inside as well. "His ship's gonna be perty far out to sea, too; you're sure—?" She stomped a hoof. "I swear to Granny's gran'ma! If'n I say them two words together one more time, I'm gonna have you wrap me in baling wire and sink me in the pond!"

That got another giggle from Rarity, then Twilight was folding her map. "I could demonstrate how I've calculated the position of your father's ship based on the information he sent and the average speed of that class of cargo steamer." She cocked her head. "Or we could just get going."

"That second one!" Applejack surged to her hoofs and just about leaped to Twilight's side. "'Fore I go completely outta my mind!"

A chuckle from Twilight. "We'll be back in about an hour, Rarity," she said; then AJ felt a breeze wash past, feathers rustling behind her. And quick as that, her bedroom was gone, the air suddenly thick and dark as a foggy winter morning. She sucked in a gasp, but then they were out under the sun and sky, a meadow on top of a little rise, woods around them on all sides. "Wow!" Twilight said. "That was easier than I thought! I'll bet I could—"

Everything blurred again, the air seeming to freeze in Applejack's lungs before the world popped back into place again: pastureland this time, a string of low hills in the distance. "Two hundred miles!" she heard Twilight crow past the sudden ringing in her ears. "Which means for four hundred miles, I'd just need to—"

The darkness crashed over Applejack as hard as a tumble down the cellar stairs, and the daylight when it reappeared smacked her across the face and staggered her sideways. "Whoa!" she shouted, the ground spinning under her hoofs.

"Eeep! Oh, Applejack, I'm so sorry!" Something warm and sturdy pressed up against her, and AJ gladly leaned into it, the swirling in her head slowing a mite. "Here! Just bend your knees and settle into the grass, OK? Can you do that?"

Applejack more collapsed than settled, but the solid earth under her belly got her feeling good enough to let out a laugh. "Can't hardly do anything else, truth be told." She blinked, got herself to focus on Twilight's anxious face, the shimmering shadow just above and behind her alicorn friend's two-tone mane resolving into the spiky branches of a big ol' spruce tree waving in the breeze from some mountains she could now see towering up into the crystal blue above. "Mighta been my imagination, but I coulda swore I heard somepony say something 'bout taking it easy not too long ago..."

Twilight's blush seemed to give off near as much heat as the sun overhead. "I'm so, so sorry," she said again. "I've been formulating some theories about harnessing the power of electron tunneling for long-distance teleportation. You see, Discord mentioned that—" Her voice stopped like she'd slammed it into a brick wall, and she looked away, purple light wavering around her horn and floating a little bottle from her saddlebag. "Here. I brought some apple juice. You might be a little dehydrated."

"Much obliged." Applejack only meant to take a sip, but her throat was so dry, the juice hitting it practically sizzled; before she knew it, she'd guzzled the whole bottle down. Setting it on the ground with her teeth, she noticed how quiet and still Twilight had gotten, not at all panicky and stammering like she usually was when she'd done something boneheaded. The sorta dusty scent about her was different, too, and since AJ had been kinda too busy all week to ask before... "Sorry me and Fluttershy couldn't make it to the library last weekend for you talking to Discord," she said, figuring she'd sidle up to the subject.

Twilight flashed an automatic sorta smile. "You've had other things on your mind, especially with Fluttershy's brother showing up all of a sudden!" She shook her head. "I can only imagine how awkward that must've been!"

"It weren't bad, actually." Thank the Mother of Mercy for small favors. "Burr even come right out and apologized for the way he acted when we met him in Manehattan, said the letters Fluttershy started sending him made him start thinking 'bout how much he'd missed her." Warmth spread through Applejack's middle. "And having him here, I mean, I's never seen Fluttershy as happy as she's been this week. Never."

"There's nothing like family." Twilight gave a little laugh. "But I don't suppose I need to tell you that." Her horn glowed, another bottle of apple juice gliding up from her bag. "Fluttershy must write amazing letters, too; Discord says— I mean, he did say... He used to say..." Her voice trailed off, and the juice bottle drifted down onto the grass, her gaze unfocused, the light fading from her horn.

"All right." Applejack leaned toward her. "What's happening with you and him anyway?"

"Nothing," Twilight said, her voice hollow as the empty bottle beside AJ's hoof. "And maybe that's for the best."

Applejack couldn't help giving a snort. "No way I'm gonna believe that, not after I seen how crazy he is for you."

"Crazy?" Twilight's head came up, her eyes hard and narrow in a way AJ was sure she'd never seen before. "That's just it. He's unstable, Applejack, the very definition of unstable! I tell him I'm interested in pursuing a possible romantic relationship, and he blows up! Literally! Into yellow powder! The whole library smelled like mustard for hours!"

"Twi—"

"And when he finally showed up at the wedding rehearsal Wednesday night, did you see what he did?! Did you?!"

"Twi—"

"Hiding up in the rafters the whole time with that giant marionette of himself dangling from his claws! I mean, yes, he moved it around to wherever he was supposed to stand, but he wouldn't talk to me, wouldn't even look at me!"

And trying one last time... "Twi—"

"He's just such a—!" Twilight leaped to her hoofs. "Such a child! And an idiot! And a vulgar lout! And—!"

"And you're crazy about him." Still not quite steady enough to stand, Applejack reached up to touch Twilight's shoulder, her friend's sides heaving, her whole body absolutely blushing.

Twilight gave a groan and dropped into the grass, her front legs folding across her eyes. "When he and I are talking, it's so...so—" She uncovered her face just enough so AJ could see those violet eyes peering out at her. "All my life, Applejack, I've been learning about the world, and all my life, everything I've learned has made the world make more sense. Yes, it made the world more complex, but it was a steady, almost linear progression: one thing leads to another to another to another. And then?" A shiver passed over her, and her wings unfurled partway. "Suddenly I'm Princess Twilight, and it's like a break in the curve, like an exponential term getting snapped onto the end of the equation!"

Not that AJ had any real idea what that meant, but she could guess how it must've played out. She patted Twilight's shoulder. "And Discord's the guy you're gonna turn to when you need an expert in stuff getting broken."

When Twilight's sides heaved this time, a sound a lot closer to a sigh than a groan came out. "The things he's showed me, AJ! Electrons that exist more as clouds of potentiality than as actual particles! Matter and anti-matter constantly and spontaneously appearing and disappearing! The churning swirl of chaos that underlies everything in the universe! It—" She shuddered again. "It's beautiful, and it makes the order that rises from it all the more beautiful."

"And it makes Discord beautiful?" AJ didn't plan on it coming out as sarcastic as it did, but, well, 'Discord' and 'beautiful' weren't words that belonged anywhere near each other.

Twilight's ears folded. "Not beautiful, no. But it makes him..."

A look came over her, her eyes fiercely bright, her nostrils flaring a mite, the tip of her tongue darting out to touch her upper lip. Applejack held up a hoof. "I withdraw the question." 'Cause she'd seen pretty much that same look on her own face in the bathroom mirror those times as she'd get all contemplative 'bout the glorious mystery of why Fluttershy's mix of mare and stallion lit her fires in ways no regular mare or stallion ever had or ever would. "He flips your switch."

"He does." The words came out softer'n the breeze rustling the grass around them. "I just want to— I want to lay him out on the ground and run my nose all up and down him, sniffing in those different aromas he gives off. I want to stroke my magic down one of his horns while I'm stroking my tongue down the other. I want to—" She swallowed so convulsively, AJ was sure she saw Twilight's neck bulge. "I want to form a ball of solid space-time around the two of us, then have him form one just inside mine so I can feel the way reality ebbs and flows between them." She closed her eyes and shivered.

"Ease up, girl!" Applejack couldn't keep the chuckle outta her voice. "Reckon I don't need to know the gruesome details."

"I'm sorry." Twilight was blushing again; she took a deep breath, opened her eyes, and turned to face AJ, a quiet kinda sadness there. "Besides, I know it can't be anything other than xenophilia on both our parts, some odd infatuation with 'the other.'" She made little air quotes with her hoofs. "I'm sure he finds me every bit as aggravating as I find him."

Wishing she didn't feel obliged to stick her big, fat snout in, Applejack shook her head. "He's scared. All his life, he's just shoved the universe around any which way to suit hisself. Now, though, for whatever reason, he's choosing not to do that, and it's left him feeling frustrated and powerless. Even worse, he's all caught up in this phony self-image thing, thinking that, because he's Discord, he's s'pposed to be a certain way and act a certain way."

She pushed herself up, quietly pleased to find she was steady enough to walk over to the bottle of apple juice Twilight had let go and pop the lid off with her teeth. "Since I know you're just dying for my advice, I'd say you might hafta make one or two more opening moves if you really wanna corral him. But he ain't likely to give up being a jerk for you."

AJ expected that last to get a chuckle or a glare, but instead Twilight was rubbing her chin, her gaze on the heights of the mountains. "Shoving the universe around," she muttered, and when she turned back, she seemed almost peppy. "Thanks, Applejack! You've given me a great idea!"

"Sweet Mother of Mercy." AJ caught the bottle 'round the neck and tipped her head back, draining the apple juice down to the last drop before spitting the bottle back out. "I was afraid you might say something like that."

Her laughter was genuine, though, Applejack could tell, and her horn flared, a flex of magic gathering the two empties and tucking them into her bag. "So! Shall we be on our way? I know what I did wrong the last time, and I promise, it'll be nice and easy from here on out!"

"Uh-huh."

"Honest!" She sprang to her hoofs, her horn sparking, and a cupcake rose from her saddlebag. "I even brought a box of cupcakes just in case it turned out that you needed me to make a Pinkie Promise at any point during the trip."

That got Applejack laughing, and she took the couple steps to Twilight's side. "Save 'em," she said. "Might be we'll be wanting a snack or two when we come out the other end."

"Oh, don't worry." More glowing from her horn brought two pink boxes from her bags. "I've got a box for snacking and a box for smashing."

All AJ could do for a bucketful of seconds was stare, the warmth that flooded her chest simmering away the last touches of cold. "Twilight? Don't ever change."

Twilight stared back. "Well, I can't promise that. I mean, nopony can, not seriously. We're all of us changing every day, Applejack, and—"

"Can we go?" She shoved the top of her hat into Twilight's side. "If I'm gonna be fainting ev'ry time we jump a mere seven hunderd miles, I reckon I still got one more to recover from 'fore we gets there."

"Oh, not at all!" Twilight's eyes curled into crescents, and ev'rything around AJ went suddenly purple and misty. "See, that's the mistake I made when we left Sweet Apple Acres." The spruce tree, barely visible through the mist, suddenly vanished. "By setting up a bubble like this, I can move our entire little subsection of time and space—" Through the mist, another landscape appeared, flatter'n before, not a tree anywhere, a shinier part of if off to AJ's right. "—without any ill effects whatsoever!" The purple all whisked away, and Applejack found herself looking across a white and yellow sandy beach, the ocean all blue and shimmery under a perfect spring sky.

"That—" AJ knew maps well enough to hafta swallow before she could go on. "That woulda been a thousand miles or so we just jumped there, sugar cube."

Looking more pleased'n a kitten in a creamery, Twilight nodded. "Like I said, if I'd been thinking, I could've done that from the beginning."

Not sure if'n she wanted to know the answer, Applejack still couldn't keep from asking: "You could've took us all the way from Ponyville to the west coast of Equestria?"

"I—" Twilight stopped, her eyes opening wide as barn doors. "Oh. Yes. That...that's kind of a little bit scary, isn't it?"

Parts of AJ were more'n willing to start nodding, but instead, she shrugged, leaned over, and nudged her shoulder into Twilight's. "I reckon it would be with anypony else. With you, though, it's just another Saturday morning."

Twilight's smile started slow, but it spread over her whole face. "Thanks, AJ." She ruffled her wings and began walking toward the water. "Of course, it means we're running early now, so your father's ship should be a bit further north than I'd calculated."

Applejack followed, the swelling and sloshing of the sea against the shore ahead already making her a mite skittish. "I ain't gonna ask if'n you're sure. I's just gonna ask what you reckon the chances are we end up swimming at some point today."

"Almost no chance at all." Twilight gave a crisp nod, her gaze fixed on the far horizon, her hoofs planted and her wings spread so she looked like wunna the statues in the Canterlot Sculpture Garden insteada the slightly grumpy little bookworm AJ had first met stumping up the path to Sweet Apple Acres not that many years ago.

So much had already changed, she couldn't help thinking. And so much was gonna change even more after today...

Then Twilight was turning, looking back over her shoulder with her regular sheepish grin. "You might want to stick close to me, though. Just in case."

Which got AJ grinning, too. "There, now. That's more like it." She sauntered over to Twilight's side and gave her another elbow to the ribs. "Least it's nice weather for a dip if'n it turns out we gotta take one."

With a little scowl, Twilight faced the horizon again, her horn glowing, the purple mist springing up around them so wispily this time, Applejack could see the water and the sand through it pretty clearly. It all winked, then the light and the sky and the sea flashed back into place—except, AJ noticed, the sky surrounded them on ev'ry side now, the sea a fair distance below them.

All the fine hairs along her neck jittered up, her ev'ry nerve about to start screaming when Twilight, still beside her, said, "Ah! There's the ship now!" Her hoof moved to point at something shaped vaguely like a chestnut just ahead and down, down, down on the surface—

And then with a jerk, solid planks popped in under her hoofs, a ship's cabin and wheelhouse rising up in front of them. The purpleness whisked away, and a crewpony, staring at them, dropped his mop with a shout of "Captain!" before turning tail and running through the side door into the cabin.

Applejack swallowed. "They're expecting us, ain't they?"

"I should think so." Twilight gave her a dazzling smile. "Don't worry, though. I read several books on nautical etiquette this past week."

Pretty sure that this news weren't as reassuring as Twilight maybe thought it was, Applejack kept her focus on the wheelhouse, figures moving around behind the glass. And not too many minutes later, a couple figures came out the side door: a scowling mare, thin as a knife blade, her black wool jacket making her seem bigger'n she was, and a rust-red stallion who couldn't've been bigger if'n he'd been Big Macintosh and who looked so much like Big Mac, AJ couldn't stop a shiver.

"Good morning, Captain Binnacle!" Twilight stepped forward, touched a front hoof to her forehead, and asked, "Permission to come aboard?"

The captain's scowl softened. "Permission granted, of course, your Highness," she said with a rough bow, a northern brogue behind her words. "Sure, and if my mother could see this! A princess of Equestria calling me by name! And to think it's all on account of this galoot!" She punched a hoof into the stallion's side, Red Gravenstein not even pretending to flinch. "Be polite and bow to her Highness!"

Poppa dipped his head, but Applejack couldn't look away from his eyes, bright and fixed on hers. "The big day, I reckon, AJ?" he asked.

Ev'rything seemed to skip a mite then 'cause next thing AJ knew, she had her front legs wrapped around his big ol' neck, her suddenly damp face buried in his mane. "Oh, Poppa!" she more sniffed than said. "I love that you're gonna be there!"

"And he's not the only one," AJ heard Twilight say softly behind her.

Turning, Applejack blinked her vision clear to see Twilight smiling. "It's a surprise," Twilight said, her horn glowing to pull a little scroll from her saddlebags; a quill drifted out as well and scratched a little check mark on it. "But this is exactly the time that I'm supposed to tell you."

"Tell me?" Stomach clenching, AJ felt her knees quiver. "Tell me what?"

Telling herself over and over that she wasn't fretting, Fluttershy paced back and forth along the far wall of the barn's old tack room, swept out and cleaned up for her to use as a changing room before the ceremony—

Four hours! Four hours till she and Applejack would 'tie the knot' as Silver Burr had put it at the rehearsal dinner two nights ago. And as much as she loved, loved, loved that Burr was here—finding him on her doorstep last Saturday night had pretty much ended her and Applejack's romantic evening, but Fluttershy honestly hadn't minded, her and her brother staying up almost till dawn talking and laughing in ways they hadn't even done when they were foals, too afraid that they might upset Mom while she was working on her tailoring or Dad while he was sleeping before going to work at whatever restaurant—

She shook her head, tried to get her thoughts in order. She'd asked Big Macintosh to show Burr around town all week because they were both so used to being quiet, and that seemed to have worked out: Applejack had even put the two of them in charge of shuttling guests from Ponyville Station to the Acres. Another glance at the table in the corner of the room assured her that Rainbow Dash and Discord were still there, each of them trying to cheat the other at some card game. They both knew about her plan and didn't like it, but she had let them know as firmly but as apologetically as she could that the matter simply wasn't up for discussion. All they needed now—

Hoofs clattered outside, and the door flew open with a burst of unicorn magic. "They've gone!" Rarity panted, a hair or two actually out of place in her mane. "Twilight said they should return with Applejack's father in approximately an hour!"

Fluttershy nodded, turned to the corner table, saw Dashie standing. "And my part in all this is to not let anypony in, right? Not your brother, not Granny Smith, not even the mayor." She stretched, her neck cracking slightly. "Is that it?"

"Yes," Fluttershy tried to say, but thinking about what she was planning made the word catch in her throat; with a swallow, she gave it another go. "Yes. And we should be back in a lot less than an hour." She looked at Discord and really, really hoped that he would agree.

He sighed instead, a couple of the playing cards idly flicking around his eagle talons. "This isn't the best idea you've ever had, Cluttersty."

"Still." Refusing to give in to the all-too-familiar run and hide feeling that trembled her mid-section or to the slightly worried look around Rarity's eyes and the sigh Rainbow blew out, Fluttershy planted her hoofs like Applejack did so often, straightened her back, puffed out her chest—and had to start coughing as her throat went twingy again.

"Here, darling," she heard Rarity say, a glass of water floating over to her.

"Thank you." She nodded, took the glass in her front hoofs, sipped at it, and started again. "We're going. Dr. Pineal and Applejack's Aunt Orange are expecting us."

"'Us'?" Discord slapped the cards down into a heap on the table. "Really? You told them you were bringing the still-widely-reviled spirit of disorder and disharmony with you?"

Taking another sip of water, Fluttershy very carefully just looked at him—not glaring or Staring. "I told her I was bringing a friend. A friend who could maybe help."

His mouth went sideways, actually twisting around on his snout till it opened from left to right when he spoke: "So you didn't lie. You just built up a completely unreasonable expectation."

That got a laugh from Rainbow Dash. "Well! Good thing you'll be there, then, huh, Discord? 'Cause unreasonable's totally your thing!"

"Fine." Discord rose from the table and straightened a long white doctor's coat that he was suddenly wearing. "Shall we go see the patient?" He snapped the claws of his lion paw, and Fluttershy found herself standing with him on the grassy lawn beside the walkway that led from the gate to the front entrance of Bellview Hospital in Manehattan, a place she'd only visited once before but knew she would never forget.

Standing just outside the doorway were two ponies she'd met for the first time a few months ago though she'd been exchanging letters with them both since then: Clementine Orange and Dr. Pineal, the unicorn in charge of treating Applejack's mother. They were both staring with their ears down, and Fluttershy again thought of Applejack, thought of how calm she always was even when things were being very, very peculiar. Forcing a smile to her face and a spring to her step, she started toward them. "Aunt Orange, Dr. Pineal, thank you for meeting us. This is my friend Discord."

She glanced back hoping, hoping, hoping that he wasn't standing there with his head on upside-down and blew out a relieved breath to see him just leaning against the brick wall that surrounded the hospital. Of course, he was also wearing gigantically oversized sunglasses, and he made a little double clicking noise with the side of his mouth as he pointed one of his eagle talons at the other two ponies. "'Sup?" he asked.

Still, it was so much better than what he could have done, Fluttershy wanted to start dancing. But instead, she looked forward again. "I'm so glad you agreed to—"

"No." Dr. Pineal's lips had gotten very tight and thin. "This isn't what I agreed to, Fluttershy, not at all, and I'll not have that...that—" She aimed a shaking hoof at the space behind Fluttershy. "—that thing set hoof inside my hospital!"

Not sure what she was going to say, Fluttershy opened her mouth anyway to defend Discord, but his sudden sigh blew her mane into her face and interrupted her. "You and me both, sister," he said, the bored tone in his voice that Fluttershy knew he used when he was trying not to show how he really felt. "I've always rather seen my mandate as putting ponies into establishments like this, not getting them out."

The doctor's lips got even thinner somehow, and Fluttershy nearly leaped forward to plead with her—

But again she was interrupted. "Please, Pineal." Aunt Orange put a hoof on the doctor's shoulder, and despite the smile on the older pony's face, Fluttershy could see tears shining at the corners of her eyes. "I won't lie and say I was expecting...this, but, well, Marmie's daughter and Miss Fluttershy are both Elements of Harmony, so of course their methods are going to be a trifle unorthodox. But if this, uhh, friend of hers can help—"

"If!" the doctor snapped. "I'm not in the habit of trusting in 'if's, Clementine!"

Taking a breath, Fluttershy rose into the air, swooped the distance separating her from the others, and settled beside them. "Then trust in me, doctor," she said, not letting her voice quiver in the slightest. "Didn't you tell me that our visit with Marmalade two months ago brought her more improvement than anything you'd been able to do for her the past ten years? And haven't you been telling me in your letters that you've been building on that breakthrough to bring Marmalade back to herself more fully than she's been since the onset of her condition?"

Her throat tried to close at the thought that she was really speaking so harshly to such an important medical professional, but she forced herself to go on: "We'll bring her right back if things get to be too much for her, but don't you think...don't you think it's worth the chance? That seeing her daughter happily married might be exactly what she needs?"

The shivers wracking through her threatened to knock her off her hoofs, but Fluttershy didn't look away from Dr. Pineal's stone-cold face. Still, it took her completely by surprise when the doctor said, "Fine. We'll go up and ask Marmalade how she feels. But if I see anything I don't like, I won't—"

The whole world flashed a familiar bright white, and Fluttershy found herself standing with Aunt Orange and Dr. Pineal in a hallway, a window at the end, Discord darting back and forth to sniff at the various doors. "Ooo!" he said, coiling into a pile in front of the last door. "This one smells like the proper curdling of apples and oranges!" He waggled his eyebrows, knocked three loud and rapid times, then pushed the door open. "Marmalade, darling! Your ride's here!"

Fluttershy squeaked and galloped down the hall with the two other ponies right behind her. Sliding through the doorway, she skidded to a halt to see Discord reclining at the small kitchen table across from Applejack's mother, Marmalade calmly finishing what might have been her breakfast or lunch: a bowl of oats, nearly empty, a partial glass of milk to the side. "I see where Applejack gets her lovely eyes," he was saying, a gentleness in his voice that Fluttershy had very rarely heard there.

"Oh, Discord," Marmalade said, and Fluttershy couldn't keep her jaw from dropping. "You are such a flirt." She smiled, and when she glanced over, the mischief in those eyes was familiar to Fluttershy, too. "And such a scamp!"

"Marmalade?" Dr. Pineal stepped forward, her face an ocean of shock.

"I'm sorry, doctor." Marmalade stood from the table, and while she seemed more delicate than Fluttershy remembered, she also seemed a lot more focused. "Discord first appeared to me two weeks ago with news of Ap—" A shudder passed through the earth pony, but she closed her eyes, took a breath, and went on: "Of Applejack's wedding, and he said he'd help me prepare to attend."

Opening her eyes, she turned a slight scowl back to where Discord was sitting with his paws pressed together, a tiny halo spinning around his horns. "He insisted on keeping it a secret, something I didn't care much for, but I knew he meant well, so I went along with it." She looked back, and Fluttershy felt herself shiver when Marmalade's gaze fixed on hers. "I'm so happy for the two of you, Fluttershy."

Then Aunt Orange was rushing past, wrapping such a big hug around Marmalade that Fluttershy was surprised they didn't end up in heap on the floor. "Marmie! It's you! It's really you!"

"Careful, Tiny!" Marmalade laughed, the sound a little rusty. "We're both a tad more breakable than we once were!"

Fluttershy felt herself tearing up, and turning away to wipe her eyes, she saw Discord now standing next to her, his expression strangely blank. "But—" She kept her voice to a whisper. "I thought you said this was a bad idea?"

"It is," Discord said just as quietly, his attention seemingly focused on Applejack's mother and sister hugging and chattering. "Marmalade's psyche is in a very precarious balance right now even with the mental balusters I've helped her erect to support it." He turned, tapped the still-gaping Dr. Pineal on the shoulder, rolled his eyes, and tapped again till she blinked and looked over at him. "Would you have a few hours free to attend a wedding, doctor? I think we'd all feel more confident if you were there should Marmie throw an emotional shoe or two."

Dr. Pineal blinked some more before her mouth pulled shut with a snap. "I believe I owe you an apology," she said then.

"Oh, you owe me more than that." Discord's grin curled a little sharper across his snout than Fluttershy liked to see.

She cleared her throat discreetly. "But if you've been working with Marmalade for two weeks, that means that you...you were coming here before I ever even mentioned my plan to bring her to Ponyville today!"

He shrugged. "What can I say, Butterfry? Other than that you've apparently been rubbing off on me. But right now—" He straightened, spread his arms, and grinned. "Ladies? I believe we have a wedding to get to!"

The whole thing was really rather affecting, Discord had to admit: Applejack absolutely clinging to poor old Marmalade when Twilight finally came traipsing in with the farm pony and her former farm pony poppa in tow; the veritable storm of emotions that flooded the place just from Granny Smith alone at seeing the son she currently considered dead and the daughter-in-law she'd never approved of nodding warily to each other and to her; Apple Bloom trembling as she stumbled forward to meet the parents she barely remembered.

Marmalade did quite well, too, all things considered. Ponies had mental processes as fragile as overcooked spaghetti, and he'd had a more difficult time than he would certainly ever admit getting Marmalade's mind to wrinkle where it ought to wrinkle and to go smooth where it ought to go smooth. He glanced at her from time to time, sitting so tightly sandwiched between her sister Clementine and Dr. Pineal that Discord almost expected to see the three of them all somehow sitting in one another's laps. She seemed appropriately misty-eyed, though, and not at all inclined to start shrieking, which the slimmest majority of his internal voices considered a victory.

At least all his voices agreed that he looked dapper in his white jacket, but then he tended to look good no matter what he wore. He and Dash followed Fluttershy, her dress making her as bright and ethereal as a nebula in a midnight sky, and even Applejack seemed more than presentable waiting with Rarity and Pinkie upon the dais constructed at the front of the barn expressly for this day. And Twilight Sparkle, standing there as well and watching him and Dash and Fluttershy processing—

No, best not to think about Twilight Sparkle and the way she embodied both those words, dusky and radiant, enticing and off-putting in equal measure. Bad enough he had to stand so close to her throughout the ceremony she'd cobbled together from a variety of sources—he was almost surprised she didn't supply footnotes—but that she performed her duties so adorably well was simply not fair in any way, shape, or form.

He in fact considered taking several different shapes and forms just to see if he could find one that was immune to her complicated simplicity, but he knew it was no use. She delivered her vapid recitations on love and friendship in ways that got warm sniffles from those assembled, and all Discord could do was stand to Fluttershy's left and try to keep his attention on everything else: Sweetie Belle warbling some heart-warming tune or other to the ragged accompaniment of a few local plumbers impersonating musicians; Fluttershy and Applejack exchanging earrings and vows; the lovely turmoil of feelings that swirled all around him. Anything that would let him avoid the turmoil that foul alicorn was inspiring in him...

Then Fluttershy and Applejack were kissing, the band was striking up at least three competing melodies, and he was marching down the aisle behind the happy couple to the cheers of all and sundry. Carts waited at Sweet Apple Acres' main gate, more townsfolk there shouting their fool heads off, the whole road into Ponyville lined with those who'd apparently had the sense not to become inveigled into actually participating in this folderol.

The town square somehow held even more ponies—had they brought them in from outlying precincts?—and a party finally erupted. Not that it was anything other than a pony party, of course, but with Pinkie Pie in charge, it at least held a bit of spontaneity, a bit of excitement, a bit of flair.

But speeches also had to be made while he stretched himself out at the far end of the head table, and he wavered back and forth between annoyance and relief that they hadn't asked him to make one. The food and drink, however, were excellent—the one thing ponies never stinted on—and Pinkie had arranged a number of games, rides, dances and other activities that he could watch ponies flail about at with varying degrees of amusement.

Celestia and Luna made an appearance as the afternoon wore on, and he managed to keep himself from flicking little chunks of cake at either of them...though he came extremely close to doing so several times during their speeches. Marmalade sat at a table in the shade of the library tree with Clementine and the doctor, visiting with various Oranges she likely hadn't seen since losing her mind. The presence of Applejack's father actually got some reaction from the laconic pile known as Big Macintosh, but where Discord had rather been hoping for some sort of knock-down, drag-out fight between the two largest stallions within shouting distance, they just ended up at a table drinking with Fluttershy's brother and nodding their greetings to whatever of the townsfolk came wandering by.

Still, as evening drew closer, both Red Gravenstein and Marmalade seemed to get antsier and antsier, and they finally made their separate ways—attended by their respective entourages, of course—to the head table to say their farewells. The churning of emotion here was exquisite, though Discord found he couldn't really enjoy it the way he had so often in the past since this time, well, this time, he was all caught up in it, wasn't he? Apple Bloom's quivering lip as her parents bade her farewell made him want to leap over and wrap her in a hug, for crying out loud! And when Red Gravenstein, seemingly unable to raise his head, said, "I don't expect y'all to forgive me the things I done 'cause I ain't even come close to forgiving myself yet," the howling of Discord's inner voices had a definite weepiness to it that he didn't care for at all.

Then Twilight was looking directly at him and saying, "I'll be back shortly," the princess and the big stallion porting away in as sweet a quantum bubble as Discord had ever seen. Every stem and branch and individual piece of fruit in the entire Apple family—Fluttershy very much included at this point—were all promising to visit Marmalade at the hospital, and she was thanking them, the shivery look around her eyes making him marvel yet again at how resilient these ponies were when they put their minds to it. Dr. Pineal nodded, and Discord snapped the three of them back to Manehattan, full dark already fallen outside the windows of Marmalade's room.

Marmalade collapsed, of course, but she was smiling as she did so instead of screaming as he'd seen her do several times in the week he'd watched her invisibly before getting enough of a feel for how her brain wasn't working to introduce himself. And as he carried her to bed while Dr. Pineal summoned up some medication or other, Marmalade snuggled against him and murmured, "Thank you, Discord. That was quite the loveliest day I've had in ages...."

Then she was dropping into restful slumber, the doctor standing with an unused hypodermic needle floating in the glow of her magic and looking at Discord as he imagined she would look at some particularly interesting lab specimen.

He cut her off before she could even begin. "Don't you dare start measuring me for scrubs and a facemask, doctor! Yes, I helped Applejack's mother take a few more steps along the road to recovery, but I'm not at all interested in doing this sort of thing on a regular basis!"

She didn't plead; she didn't scold; she didn't shout. And that bothered Discord more than he thought it ought to. "As you wish," she said, the syringe vanishing with the tinkle of a tiny bell and the slightest wisp of a smile trickling over her lips. "Though if I were to perhaps write to Fluttershy now and again about some of our more interesting and complex cases and if she perhaps thought they might merit your attention—"

Bursting into a cloud of talcum-scented dust, he left her there, raced halfway across the continent in a quarter blink of an eye, and slid into a shadowed spot between the quill and sofa store and one of the several cake pavilions Pinkie had set up around the town square. That this whole friendship thing had its talons sunk deeply into him he no longer tried to deny, but he was determined to fight the web of connections it was trying to draw him into for as long as—

"There you are," said a voice as dark and sweet as clover honey, and he snapped his head around to see Twilight Sparkle stepping into the little alcove, the music and the evening breeze swirling gently around her and making him want to melt into a puddle of coal tar. "I was wondering—" She flared her wings, flexed them and reared back to balance on her hind legs with a motion that should have looked incredibly awkward but was in fact the most supplely fascinating thing he has ever seen in his whole long life. "—if you might be interested in a dance," she finished.

No! nearly every one of his inner voices shrieked, but Discord couldn't look away, couldn't stop himself from creeping along the cobblestones of the town square toward her, from reaching out to touch her shoulders, from sliding into the glorious unnaturalness of her embrace. He should be spinning her wildly, he knew, should be dipping and whirling her till her eyeballs rattled in her skull. But instead, he stood swaying with her and against her in the darkness, the music fast and frenetic and completely incorrect. Which made it, of course, perfect in every single way.

How long they held each other shuffling in slow circles there, he had no idea, but it was altogether too soon when she murmured, "We need to talk."

"Please no," he managed to say, his voice cracking like stone under the millennia-long onslaught of wind and rain.

"Noon tomorrow at the library," she said, pushing away from him, her front hoofs resting on his chest and those purple eyes glowing slightly. "I have a solution to propose to our...our situation, and if you don't like it, I'll never bring the subject up again." The glow in her eyes strengthened as they pulled partway closed. "Be there, Discord, or I'll hunt you down: that's a promise."

He couldn't help blowing a breath out through his lips. "As if you could find me if I didn't want to be found."

"Want?" Her smile was a slow and sultry thing, the fine hairs between his horns prickling up with the electricity she seemed to be generating. "There's that word again." She slipped from between his paws, dropped to all fours, and started for the tent flap that had created this little space. "Noon. Tomorrow."

"I'll check my appointment calendar!" he called after her, but he knew it was no good. He'd be there. By all that was sweetly twisted and horribly right, he would be there.