Brothers
Chapter 13: Carry On
Previous ChapterGale rose silently from his bed. He looked outside; the sun was just beginning to rise, and his room was painted gold by it rays.
Methodically, he kicked off his sheets, made his way to the bathroom, showered, and dressed. As he buttoned the collar on his dress blues, the Marine Corps formal uniform, he retrieved yesterday's paper one more time. He was still having trouble accepting its headline as truth.
"War Over. Griffons Surrender."
It had been so sudden. One day, they were fighting a horrible war, the next, they were coming back damaged and incomplete, and now, their efforts were rewarded.
Celebrations were still going on all over town. Even though Gale, as well as his brother, did not partake in the victory parade across Equestria, they had watched. Joyous stallions and mares celebrated a much deserved period of peace; but at what cost?
The war was over, but the signs of its happening lingered, and would continue to do so. A missing leg, a scarred eye, a mangled wing, an absent family member. These things weighed heavily on Gale's mind.
But the most obvious thing in his head, among all the others, was a simple question. Now what?
For years, the war had been a part of him, even though it was a less than desirable piece. It had taken so much from him, and now, how could he get it back; the war was gone, and now thousands like him were left to carry on, as if nothing had happened. But how?
How could he make peace with what he had done, with what had been done to him, with what had been done to his friends and family? How could anything in the peaceful world make up for what he had experienced a world away? How could he continue living? These things, the demons of his past and the pain of the present coupled with the clouded future, haunted him.
Gale finished dressing, took what he'd need for the day from the table, and set out to finally make peace with those demons; or at least, with some of them.
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Gale touched down on the moist lawn, and gave his aching wings a break. The flight had been a long one, but worth it.
He stood erect, folded his wings against his side, and strode forward. The large iron gates were open, the space inside being empty in a way, as nopony was moving around. He stopped in the entrance, almost afraid to cross the threshold into the complex again.
But he had to; he had no choice but to take the next step.
He wearily, with those sad, icy blue eyes, looked around, gauging the entrance booth, standing vacant a few dozen feet inside the complex, the green, wet grass, the countless rows of marble rectangles, and finally, the sign; "Fort Constellation Military Cemetery; Stableside, EQ.
Gale shrugged his saddlebags into place, and blinked away a tear, walking erect through the gates, using all of his mental strength to keep his four legs, three flesh, one metallic, moving forward.
A paved road circled around the infinite headstones, standing in formation as the bodies they marked once did.
Gale tried to remember where the site he was looking was located, and he ended up wandering around on the road for the better part of an hour, and covered more than a few miles before he saw the cemetery's sole landmark; a large oak, the only one allowed to grow in the center of the cemetery as a sort of symbol. Gale knew that, in its shadow, was the grave of his brother.
He forced a smile, trying to trick himself into being anything but depressed, and made his way in between the columns to his sibling's final resting place.
He reached it after what seemed like another hour, and in the shade provided by the all-embracing arms of the oak, he found the headstone he was looking for.
"LCpl Stryker, Miles; Stableside; Bronze Star.
Gale looked down at the slab of rock, and suddenly, felt weak. He knelt, and rolled over onto his back, lying down with his upper body propped up adjacent to the alabaster tombstone. He removed his saddlebags, and again, drowned a tear with a smile.
"Hey Miles," he said softly, placing a hoof on top of the marble, "It's me."
Birds sang in the tree above him, and a gentle breeze blew through the grass, but for all the serenity, Gale could not find peace; not yet.
"I just came by today to talk to you," he said, looking up at the bluebird sky, "I thought you might like it."
"Flash and me did what you wanted us all to do. We thought it'd make you happy. We moved to a small town, this place called Ponyville. It's nice, you would have liked it."
"We found some good work too; Flash is helping out on the biggest farm in town, and I'm working for the weather patrol. It pays nice, but the real value is in the friends we've met."
Gale looked away suddenly, trying to avoid crying.
"The town's full of good ponies, and gaining friends is no problem. There's six in particular. We met them all about a week ago. My boss was one of them; Flash's is another. I guess it's better to be friends with your higher ups than enemies. Another one is Flash's girlfriend."
Gale couldn't help but chuckle a bit.
"You know him; he scored the finest mare in town within a few days of moving in. She's very beautiful, nice too; she made a new prosthetic for me for free. And I think he's happy with her; he better be, because he's actually taking the relationship seriously. Most of his paychecks have been going towards dates with her."
"I haven't had the same luck, but, I've got my eye on this one. The only thing that's holding me back is that she's Flash's boss. I don't want to screw him over, but she's damn near perfect. Hard-working, pretty, strong family values, but above-all, she understands and honors what we did over in Germaneigh."
"The six I was talking about all do, but she understood before we showed her. There was this spell that let them into my head, and they saw what happened to you. I thought it would help me to cope, and help the world to remember you. I didn't think you'd mind."
He sat there in silence for a long time, looking at the clouds.
"I brought you some things," he said at last, reaching into his saddlebags.
"I brought that picture you carried while we were over there. I thought you'd want it back."
Gale looked at the framed photograph for a while before placing it on the grass at the foot of the headstone; it was a portrait of a family, his family. Dad, a tall, thin, matte black earth pony stallion with brown eyes, wearing a Marine Corps uniform. On his shoulder was a colt, the foal's smile barely outdoing the stallion's in splendor. The colt was silvery grey, a Pegasus, Gale. On the stallion's left was a mare, a beautiful, white Pegasus, her long blonde mane coming down to below her breast; Mom, her dazzling smile and ice blue eyes lighting up the rest of the picture. In her arms was another colt, a foal, and a young one at that, whose coat, eyes and mane matched his mother's perfectly. The middle of the picture was occupied by a third foal, a black one resembling his father in eyes, coat and mane, only he had wings as well. His smile was miniscule next to the others, and he appeared to be flexing, trying to look tough for the camera; Flash.
The resemblances were uncanny. Flash was a mirror image of his father; Miles looked like the reflection of his mother, and Gale was a blend of the two. He placed the photo reverently into the grass, propping it up against the marble.
"I can see why you carried this the whole time," said Gale, swallowing hard as he feigned yet another smile, "We didn't take too many pictures with dad before he shipped out that last time, or before mom's hair started falling out."
A tear fell, despite his best efforts, and it added to the dew in the green grass. He retrieved another item from the bag.
"I also brought you this," he choked, removing his dog tags, as well as the one that belonged to Miles, and tied them around the headstone, "I don't need them any more, but you're a marine forever now; you don't get discharged when you're in here," Gale removed an opened envelope, and threw it onto the ground as well, "unlike the rest of us."
"Flash and me are out, officially this time," he said, looking away sorrowfully, "So I just wanted to come by and talk to you one last time as a Marine. I'll be back to talk to you as a brother later, but I won't be able to wear dress blues then."
Gale stood, standing over the headstone now, and looked down on the grave, complete with a picture, dog tags, and an envelope, and no longer retained his tears. He began crying freely, and his words came in between sobs as he continued to talk to his silent sibling.
"Look Miles, I'm sorry. I should be in the dirt, and you should be the one where I am now. I promised that I'd get you out ok, but here I am, and there you are. I wasn't good enough to keep you alive, and not a day goes by that I don't regret it. I'm sorry."
His face was wet with tears.
"God, the worst part is knowing that I'll never hear 'I forgive you', or 'it's ok'. "
He looked away, not knowing quite what else to say, so he just let it all out at once.
"And that's what I need to hear most right now. I'll never forgive myself, and I'll never hear you say anything again, but if you're listening, hear me when I say that I'm sorry for everything. Everything I ever said or did to hurt you, everything I missed when I signed up, and everything I ended when I failed to keep you safe. Whether you forgive me or not is up to you, but you have to know that I'm sorry!"
His head bowed, but his knees remained strong as his voice lost its strength.
"Look, if I could change what happened, I would, but I can't, so I have to make some changes now. I hate that I'm alive and you're not, but I can't reverse the past."
Gale squatted in front of the grave, and placed his hoof on top of the marble tombstone.
"Miles, I'll never forget you. I love you and I always will; I loved you so much that when you died, a piece of my soul went with you, but if I don't start living, I feel like what you died for will be put to waste. Flintlock, Whiplash, the guys from Golf and Hotel, you all died so that Equestria could be safe, and her citizens could live in peace. I'm not a soldier now, I'm a civilian, and what we fought for now applies to me. I would be disgracing you and everypony else if I kept living in the past, depressed and scared. I have to move on."
"I'll always carry you with me. Everywhere I go, everypony I meet, your legacy will continue through me. And I promise I'll make you proud."
He paused for a second.
"Say hi to mom and dad, and the guys for me."
He kissed his hoof, and then laid it over his brother's name, inscribed in the marble.
"I'll see you later bro. I love you."
He stood erect, swallowed what was left of his tears, and stood at attention. He snapped a salute to the headstone, held it for a moment, then turned, and marched from the graveyard to try and carry on.
Author's Notes:
Thank you very much for reading. I hope you enjoyed it.