State Of Mind
Chapter 7: Mind State - Vision Impared
Previous Chapter Next ChapterI was floating. I was floating in space of all places, I felt the weightlessness of it as I slowly drifted. I found all my childhood constellations, Leo, The Big Dipper, Orion and his belt. I smiled. Space was quiet, too quiet. If I was dead, shouldn't I be hearing the song of heaven or the fiery depths of hell? I looked down to my body and saw the gaping wound, I trace the opening with my finger. I remember, the fight, the final punch I threw and then the feeling of my existence slipping away.
I went over the fight again and again, asking myself the same questions. Did the CMC get away? Was I really dead? Who was that figure approaching me near the end? I then remember my last words, “Applejack.....I'm.....Sorry”. I shiver, not from cold but from realisation that I said that to a complete stranger. I traced the hole in my abdomen again before sighing. I knew then I surly was dead, how could I have survived? I mean look at me, i'm floating through space and I can breathe! Wait! Dead people can't breathe, can they?
I was contemplating to myself when a voice I had not heard in weeks spoke.
“I see you have finally awoken!”
“Princess Luna? Is that you?” I look around for the source of her voice. “I can't see you.”
“Yes John, It is I! I am using my dream walk power to converse with you.”
“Dream walk?”
“Yes, I have the ability to enter a pony's mind and help them with nightmares or give them pleasant dreams.”
“Pleasant dreams? You mean....” I make a lewd gesture.
“No! How could you propose such a thing!?” She screams.
“Sorry! I guess i'm not thinking and all, you know since i'm dead.”
“You're not dead John, you are asleep.”
My heart beats faster. Not dead! I'm not dead! I let out a scream of joy as I throw my arms into the air. Of course my reaction seemed confusing to Luna.
“John? Are you ok?”
“Yes! You just told me i'm not dead! I'm ecstatic!”
“Oh! Yes, I should have mentioned that!” I face palmed. “Any way this scene is getting uncomfortable. Just a second.”
I looked around as the stars went out, then to be replaced with green landscape and rolling hills. I felt the wind on my face and the sound of birds and wildlife all around me. I stand closing my eyes and taking in the smells and sounds as they washed over me. I turn when I hear the sound of something landing behind me. It was Luna.
“Princess.” I say bowing.
“John there is no need for that! You have earned my respect for what you did.”
“For what I did?”
I see Luna flair her horn and a replica of me and the CMC appear before us, I watch in fascination as the image plays out the scene before my fight with the timber wolves.
“Girls, what ever happens I want you to run back the way we came!” I hear my double say.
“What!?” The girls shout out.
“You heard me! I want you to run and don't look back till you get to safety.”
“We can't just leave you!” Sweetie Belle cries.
“Yeah ma sister would kill me if ah left you here alone!” Apple Bloom says tearing up.
“You girls are my responsibility, if anything happened to any of you, I couldn't show my face in Ponyville again.”
The image fades, Luna stands there smiling at me.
“What you did was beyond what anypony expected of you! That is why I asked one of my closest followers to help you.”
“Is that who appeared before I blacked out.”
“Yes! Her name is Clairvoyant. She has been living in the forest far longer than any pony, even the zebra. When you awake you will be in safe hooves.” I see Luna grimace as she finds the wound in my stomach. “But let's take care of that first ok?” She lifts her hoof and swipes it over the opening, the hole vanishes leaving nothing not even a scar.
I rub at the area trying to see if it's some illusion or trick. But no it was real, my wound was gone. I smiled at her as she then took on a more serious tone.
“John, I also came to you tonight because something has come to my attention I think you will want to hear.”
“It's about my way home isn't it?”
“No, we are still looking! I promise you! This however is much more important.”
“How can this be much more important?”
“Because it concerns you and a close pony friend of yours.” My mind thinks of Applejack.
“Who?”
“I can't explain, it would be better if I showed you!”
Luna flairs her horn again and the scenery changes. This time I find myself standing in Ponyville town centre. The town was weird because all the ponies I could see were standing still like they were frozen in time.
“Why are they all frozen?” I ask.
“This is a vision given to me by another follower who has the ability to see the future but in small amounts. She gave me this vision because it seemed out of place and that she couldn't identify the....Well you will see for yourself.” Luna waves a hoof and the vision starts.
I see ponies walking around that I have met before, I see Lyra, Roseluck, Applejack and many others going about their daily jobs. I was about to say something as nothing happened after a few minutes, when this black shadow flew over my head and landed in the market square. It was a black carriage sporting a crescent moon on the side, it was being pulled by two pegasi clad in black armour that was highlighted with blue. I watched in awe as three ponies got out but it was the first pony that grabbed my attention.
He was big, I would say slightly taller than Big Mac but not by much. I noticed the wings by his side, he was a pegasis; I have never seen one so large before. Judging by his size and the distance between the curve of his wing to the tip, his wingspan had to be at least seven to eight metres wide. I saw the pony gesture to the two behind him to stay put, the ponies respond with quick salutes; so this guy was some leader I take it. I turn to Luna but she's just staring at the large pony with....Wait, was she crying? I start to follow the large pony as he walks through the market.
I look him over, he was wearing some sort of armour. It encased him from head to hoof with parts covering were his muzzle would be. I also saw that the pony's eyes were covered aswell, His wings had been dressed in some sort of tight fitting chain mail, probably to give him protection and allow him to fly. I followed him to his destination, Ponyville library; Twilights house. The pony knocked on the door, a few seconds later a familiar purple dragon opened it.
“Um? Can I help you?” Spike asked.
“Is the mare of the house present?” The large pony asks with a gruff voice, masked even more by his enclosed helmet.
“Yes, she is upstairs.”
“It is important that I speak with her!”
“Ok, I'll give her a shout.” Spike turns and shouts from the doorway. “Twilight! You have some armoured pony asking for you!”
“Who is it?” I hear come from inside.
“I just told you it's some armoured pony!” Spike retorts.
“Tell her I come from Princess Luna.” The armoured pony states.
“He comes from Princess Luna!” Spike shouts behind.
I hear something drop, I don't know if it was a mirror or some vase but it definitely sounded like glass. It was followed moments later by a purple flash and Twilight appearing at the door.
“I'm Twilight Sparkle, this is my home! Can I help you?”
“Yes you can Miss Sparkle! By coming with me!”
“What!? Going where!?” Twilight asks.
The large pony turns his head and opens a compartment on his armour and pulls out three objects. Now i'm not an expert when it comes to these things but I know shackles when I see them.
“Miss Sparkle! By the authority granted to me by Princess Luna and by being the Highest ranking member of the crescent guard! I hereby place you under arrest for the theft of the Royal Emerald Star! Please come quietly!”
“Under arrest! But I haven't stolen anything!” Twilight says clearly horrified at what's happening.
“That is not for me to decide! These orders come from Princess Luna herself, Please don't make this any harder!” The large pony sighs. “I will use force if you resist!”
“Then is have no choice, do I?” Twilight states raising up her hooves.
The armoured pony fastens the shackles against Twilights legs and puts some sort of ring around Twilights horn.
“What's that ring thing?” I ask Luna.
“It's a device designed to suppress a unicorns magic.” Luna replies.
“I don't understand though princess, what has this vision got to do with me?”
“I'm amazed you have not realised who that large pony is, have you?” Luna says turning to face me.
I look closer and for the life of me I couldn't see who it was, the armour was obscuring everything; that is until the pony turned to look at his guard friends. It then hit me,
“That's me, Isn't it.” I say. “That large pony is me.”
“Yes, This is why I had to show you, for some reason you are part of...No! Leader of a new branch of my army I only thought of two days ago!” Luna exclaims.
“How? Why?”
“I don't know! The crescent guard is a new plan by me to create my own version of Celestias royal guard.”
“But don't you have the night guard?” I ask.
“Yes but they are more like spies and infiltrators, I need a group of ponies that can give as much as they get; apparently you are the leader of that group, and quite dashing too!” The last part threw me off guard.
“What!?” I splutter, almost falling over.
“Sorry I got carried away, but this vision isn't over; more follows.” We both turn back as Twilight is now being led through the market flanked by the two guards that exited with my future self. I see Twilight holding her head low, I was disgusted with myself for doing this to a friend. I clenched my fists, feeling the anger inside me.
Then something confused me, I saw my future self lean to Twilight and whisper something; it made Twilight perk up and nod.
“Did you just see that?” I ask Luna.
“See what?” For an alicorn she sure was blind.
“My future self whispered something to Twilight.”
“Probably for her to keep walking.”
“No, it was something that made her nod in understanding not obedience.”
“You can tell the difference?” Luna asks.
“Of course, can't you?”
“Guess I have been out of the lime light of ruling for so long, I have forgotten some of my baser instincts.”
“What ever it was, it seemed to be only for Twilight's ears.” I say.
As I watched Twilight was led to the back of the carriage and put inside. Her shackles were magically tethered to a rail to prevent her from moving. I saw my future self say something to her that made her nod again, as the carriages back doors were shut my future self turned and caught Applejacks eyes. Applejack was crying.
I saw my future self go to approach her but out of nowhere the form of Big Mac stepped in front of me. My future self frowned.
“Nope!” I all I heard Big Mac say.
My future self just nodded and turned away. I saw myself step into the front of the carriage and order the two pegasi pulling it to take off, I don't know if I saw it correctly but as the carriage lifted off I saw a single tear roll down my future selfs face. That was when the vision froze again.
“That is when it ends.” Luna states.
“So there's no more?” I ask.
“No, but I will endeavour to uncover more if I can.”
“You and Celestia are doing so much for me, I can't ask any more of you.”
“This vision definitely needs more of my attention, but my sister will keep her search going.” Luna says turning to walk away.
“Wait! What am I supposed to do? Forget this ever happened?”
“I don't expect you to forget, but you have a long way to go before this vision comes to fruition. I think you need to prepare for what ever your future will bring.” Luna extends her wings.
“Wait you're leaving?” I ask.
“Yes, I can feel you are going to wake soon!”
“Princess Luna before you go, can I ask you something?”
“Go ahead.”
“Do you consider me a good person?”
Luna folds back her wings, she turns to me with a look of confusion.
“Why do you ask?”
“I just want to know that if I change into something i'm not, that you all remember me for who I was.”
“You will always be a good person, even I have seen it; though sometimes you should keep your fantasies to day dreaming.” Luna blushes slightly.
“Oh! You saw that did you?” I rub the back of my head.
“More like all of them! I should really stop keeping an eye on you.” Luna giggles.
The embarrassment was too much, I felt the heat rise in my face.
“I take it this is the last time I'll see you for awhile?” I ask, feeling my blushing subsiding.
“I that's what you wish, but you can call to me in your dreams if I am not helping some other pony.” Luna replies.
“I would like that, though I think if I was to say I have a princess' ear some ponies might see that as a bad thing.”
“Then our meetings will be secret, and I promise your marefriend will not know; though her fantasies are just as 'erotic' as yours.” Luna smiles as she takes to the air.
“I wish you well in your search princess.” I say.
“And I wish you well in your future John.” Luna looks up as if she can hear something. “I have to go will we speak again, goodbye John.”
Before I can reply the environment around me swirls and fades taking Luna with it. The darkness is soon replaced by a new warmth. I slowly feel my body again as the pain in my back and stomach comes in waves. I open my eyes, a blinding light enters and causes me to wince.
“Oh! I am so sorry, here let me turn that down.”
I don't recognise the voice and I panic slightly, I remember what Luna told me “Her name is Clairvoyant. She has been living in the forest far longer than any pony, even the zebra. When you awake you will be in safe hooves.”
I bring one of my hands to my head and try to calm the pounding headache I was feeling.
“Oh, you shouldn't move so soon! Your injuries were quite severe!”
“Where – where am I?” I ask, rubbing my temples.
“You are in my home, my name is -”
“Clairvoyant.” I state while cutting her off.
“Yes, how did you know?”
“I spoke to a mutual friend of ours.” I point to my head hoping she would get the gesture. I am so glad she did.
“You spoke to Princess Luna! Oh how wonderful! You must be very important!?”
“Not really, I'm just your regular old human.” I reply.
“Nonsense! The princess would only speak to you if you had to be important.” She says waving a hoof at me.
“Any way it doesn't matter. All that matters is you helped me and saved my life.”
“It was nothing, your injuries were severe but not to the point they couldn't be repaired.”
“Again I thank you Clairvoyant, I should be dead now.” I start to feel a bit faint so I lay back down.
“Like I said you shouldn't be moving, the magic takes awhile to work and your body is still recovering.” Clairvoyant pushes my body so I'm lying properly on the bed.
I go to retort but my stomach flairs as if something was working it's way through my body. I reach down and feel where I was punctured and there's nothing. There's no scar, no hole just me. I circle my fingers over the area and feel the tenderness of the skin.
“Oh yes, that injury was the worst; I had to spend almost five hours repairing that.”
I pull my hand away and close my eye's......Wait!
“five hours!?” I shout springing up and regretting it two seconds later.
“Yes, you have been unconscious for seven hours.”
“My friends! They must be worried sick, that I died or something!” I enter what I like to call of state of 'perpetual mind fuck'. It's a mixture of confusion and major overflow of anxiety. It's the feeling you get when you go to the hospital for someone to check out your ass and they show you what they will be sticking up there. Yeah THAT feeling.
“Oh my! I should have sent them that message by now!” Clairvoyant runs over to a small desk and writes out a small note. She then runs over to an open window and gives a whistle, several seconds later a bird flies up and she puts the message on it's leg. I watch as the bird takes off heading what I think is the direction of Ponyville.
“Does the bird know who to take that to?”
“Oh no, but he will give it to somepony in Ponyville and they will get it to your friends.” She replied, giving me a warm smile.
“You know a lot of ponies in Ponyville?”
“Yes, a few but I try to limit my contact. To avoid any complications.” Clairvoyant walks over to a tea pot and pours out some sweet smelling liquid.
“Complications?” I ask with a hint of confusion.
“I have a unique ability that draws suspicion and by limiting my contact with other ponies, I can stop that suspicion.”
“I take it your name has something to do with said ability?” I try not to sound obvious.
“Yes.” Clairvoyant looks around as if someone's watching, weirdly enough I do it aswell. “I have the ability to see a pony's future by touching them and focusing.”
“So you gave the vision to Princess Luna?”
“Vision? I have not been contacted by the Princess for many moons, until today that is.”
“Hmm, well could you....I don't know, do me then?” Clairvoyant spits out some of the liquid she was testing.
“Pardon!?” She asks, her eye's widening.
“You know use your gift on me.”
“Oh that! I guess it won't do any harm.” She picks up and cup of the sweet liquid and hands it to me. “This nectar will help you relax and heal while I conduct the touching.”
“The touching?” I ask looking sly.
Clairvoyant facehoofs, “Just relax ok? It won't hurt a bit.”
Clairvoyant reaches out and touches my leg as I sip the nectar. I look at her face as a frown comes over it, then it is followed by an expression of pain. Just before I go to touch her she jumps out of her trance like state and backs away from me.
“What! What did you see?” I ask eagerly.
“I can only see a few days into the future but...”
“But what?”
“Do you really want to know?”
“Yes tell me, please.”
“You are going to go through a large amount of pain and suffering, your closest friends will be there to help you but you will come out changed.” She places a hoof on my leg. “I'm sorry John.” Her look of anguish is disheartening.
“Change? What change? Did you see it?”
“No I didn't, but what ever it was it made ponies that carried great respect for you, gasp in shock.”
I lean back on the bed again after putting the bowl I was drinking out of down. I look at the ceiling feeling dread but also frustration that Clairvoyant couldn't tell me more. She went to comfort me but I held up my hand and said.
“The future is not written in stone yet, it can still change.”
Clairvoyant nods. I ask if we can change the subject and I went on to ask about her. At first Clairvoyant was hesitant but she told me anyway saying that if she couldn't trust me, a favourite of Luna, then really who can she trust? We talked for a long while, but every question I asked and was asked in return there was one question I kept asking myself.
Was my future, the unwritten future; going to end badly for me or for my friends? But I knew one thing, what ever it was I was going to face it with every fibre of my being and there was no living creature big or small was going to change that.
Next Chapter: Mind state - Confession to the night Estimated time remaining: 13 Hours, 30 Minutes