Princess Luna had to admit that she had certain expectations upon being woken up in the early evening to raise her moon, first of which was ‘coffee,’ and the second of which was ‘right now.’ It had been a most comfortable afternoon of rest with the cushions of the office providing a soft surface the even the most fluffed of clouds would not have been able to match, although most of the comfort was probably due to fatigue, not fluff.

Being preened to sleep had always been a secret desire lurking in the back of her mind ever since an eternity ago when she and Celestia would curl up together after stressful nights. Heavens forbid she ask a servant, and any of her suitors from ages past had always been interested in other things after a long, intimate preen. Still, Lord Green Grass had lowered himself to the task without a word of protest, even though she could feel the tremble of taunt tendons against her cheek when she had rested her head on his back for just a moment. That moment had stretched into minutes while the trembling had subsided, eventually turning into a low tune as the earth pony hummed while preening. It was a lullaby, and certainly a most potent one to reduce a princess to such a relaxed state, but she could not help but think about the little snippets of words she had heard while sleeping.

No, the word was incorrect. Celestia slept, Luna dreamed. There was no way for her to avoid awareness of the world around her even in slumber; she could only cast aside the bounds of mortal clay and drift on the winds between thought and reality, between what was and what could be. The whispers of the ponies in the town had been a comfort throughout her rest, their admiration and loyalty a strong bond that overlaid and faded the dreaded words ‘Nightmare Moon.’ Canterlot bristled with the hateful words, said in the shadows between the rich and poor as they went about their lives, but here, the words were all soft and tempered with love. Ponyville had seen her return as Nightmare Moon first-hoof, in fire and destruction that had split their town hall like a lightning-struck tree, but the small town had also borne the presence of young Twilight Sparkle ever since. The rumors of the little alicorn’s existence were rife with speculation, ranging from vague shadows of the truth to a rather intriguing theory that she was actually a child of Luna or Celestia, but the townsponies had accepted the redemption of their Monster of the Everfree Forest with a warmth that flowed over to encompass the one who had twice attempted to plunge the world into Night Eternal.

It was a youthful joy that her heart had not felt in ages to ‘tweak’ the young tutor into that most delightful blush. His worries were a mirror of Twilight Sparkle; where he wished to escape his parents and live far away, she fairly burned with the desire to hold them all tight and once again become part of their lives. Luna was almost tempted to take the young earth pony as a prospective mate, if nothing else to tweak the noses of the arrogant unicorn royalty and to tie the militant pegasus factions into knots, but feeding the young colt into that corrosive atmosphere of intrigue and deceit would be a crime. There were far too many problems in the world that were best left untouched; only a select few problems or issues could provide a net benefit from even the slightest celestial influence, and most would fall apart like wet bread at their touch.

Still, it gave her great pleasure to banter with her little ponies as if they were equals, and the jibe about the Royal Gelding Irons brought far more laughter than she had expected. Luna was in a fey mood indeed when she trotted outside the coffee shop, cup at her lips, and saw the whole town of ponies all turned out in the town plaza.

Each of them with their hooves twisted slightly into the ground.

Luna did not need words to see what needed to be done. She could feel the flutter of wings as Laminia left the coffee shop and flew overhead, dropping to a landing next to her stocky husband. The Nocturne couple stood next to the mismatched zebras as if it were the most natural thing in the world, both with space enough between them for the one who would join them in eternal bonds of matrimony.

The Princess of the Night glided forward, passing the coffee cup to one side as she walked, until she took her place, one last puzzle piece in a harmonious whole. The town of ponies looked up to the sky where Celestia’s sun rested on the horizon and took a collective deep breath, gathering their strength for what was to come. A stillness filled the grassy area, a quiet and tranquility that soothed souls and calmed hearts, although there was just the tiniest of giggles from Luna as she considered what her sister was going to think in just a few minutes.

Princess Celestia stepped out on the balcony of the Royal Jodhpurs Hotel in Fillydelphia and regarded her sun with the smallest of smiles. It just felt so much like she was leaving an infant behind in the hooves of a stranger, but Luna was a big fillie now, and even though they would be apart for two days, certainly she would not return to Canterlot to find messy diapers or crayon scribbles on the walls.

The time arrived, and Celestia raised her horn as she had done so many, many times before, gently placing her sun to rest behind the horizon — far too gently, in fact. There was a touch on her beloved sun and Celestia watched in shock as it finished tucking away for the night and the moon swelled into view, perhaps a little more unsteady than usual, but still the glorious silver orb that lit the stars in the sky as a curtain of light.

She remained out on the balcony for a moment while soaking in the peace that the unadorned moon meant to her. Still, there was a tiny current of unease in her gaze, and she took a quick trip to the maid’s closet to check the contents before retiring for the night.

It felt silly, but she just wanted to know what kind of cleaners were available to get the little hoofprints off of her sun tomorrow.

Luna let her magic fade as the silver light of her moon filled the plaza, highlighting the ponies as pale shapes in the darkness. It was impossible to tell the difference between changeling, pony, or Nocturne for a moment until the light built into a soft dazzle. She took the time to look at the two couples awaiting her blessing on their union and smiled. Even little Twilight Sparkle peeked out from behind her adoptive mother’s legs and managed a small smile of her own before Luna cleared her throat and began.

“My dearly beloved little ponies. We are gathered here together to join…”

This third machine was going to be even better, and Monster sipped a quick drink of her cold beverage before bending over the instruction sheet with a quill and a qualm. It felt just a little bad to ignore her friend’s statements about going out and enjoying the party for a while before they tried to tackle the third coffee machine. There would be time to spend with them once the machine was built. This was important. It had to be just right.

The liquid in the bottles tasted like cold coffee with a distinctive tang to it that cleared the mucus off the back of her throat and made the task of assembling the coffee machine easier. It had only taken a cup of the ‘liqueur’ to warm her tummy while they assembled the first machine and ate lunch afterwards, but now that she drew across the plans for the third coffee machine with broad strokes and swoops of her quill, she found herself drinking more and more out of her glass. Adding ‘ice cubes’ to it had improved the taste several fold to the point that the level in the bottle dwindled rapidly as she worked, humming idly to herself in counterpart to the happily perking machine on the wall.

Trixie leaned against Twilight and watched the wedding through the window, taking the time to add her broad hat to the little alicorn’s head to fend off the low trembling she could feel across her back. “You wish you could be down there, don’t you?”

“No,” said Green Grass, bent over an evaluation with his red pencil.

“Not you, stupid.” Trixie nudged her ‘sister.’ “Menace.”

“I’d be too afraid. Here. Need you to sign.” Twilight remained with her tail pointing towards the wedding and her nose pointed at the table while slipping a thick stack of papers over to Trixie and holding out a pen. “Witnesses.”

“I swear there won’t be a tree left standing in Equestria by the time we’re done,” grumbled Trixie, turning away from the touching wedding scene and applying her flamboyant signature to the sheets that Twilight slipped under her pen. “How much paper is involved in a wedding, anyway?”

“Be glad you didn’t have to sign invitations or thank you notes,” grumbled Green Grass in a matching crabby voice. “Not to mention the Oops-Sorry-Here’s-Your-Present-Back cards. Did you know Stallmark made a special wedding card just for my parents?”

“Here on this line,” said Twilight, sliding the bundle of papers over to the tutor and pointing. “And here. Here. Sign and date here. And here.”

“My jaw is cramping up,” he mumbled through the pen.

“Your poor bride will never forgive you at the honeymoon,” said Trixie with a snicker.

“There,” said Twilight, taking the stack of paper and blowing on a few to dry the ink. “Still need the mayor or Luna to sign before done. Official.”

Setting the pen to one side, Green Grass massaged his jaw. “So how does it feel to be gaining another father, Twilight?”

“Weird.” She huddled deeper under Trixie’s hat and shivered.

“Well you are getting a weird father, I suppose,” said Trixie. “Better than Greenie’s.”

“Trixietrixietrixie!” A blur of pink dashed upstairs and turned into a Pinkie Pie, hopping from one hoof to another like a little filly outside a crowded restroom. “We need your help with the fireworks! We were going to have these big boomers and bursts go off right when — where did she go?”

“Come on, Pinkie!” sounded Trixie’s voice from downstairs at the door. “Hurry up!”

“Got it!” A pink blur vanished down the stairs before zipping back up, depositing a piece of cake and a glass of punch in front of Green Grass and Twilight and zipping back down the stairs again. “Coming!”

Green Grass paused and considered the plastic fork he found himself holding in one hoof before digging into the cake and taking a bite. “This place is crazier than the asylum. But the food is better.”

“Is Pinkie Pie crazy?” asked Twilight, cringing under Trixie’s hat so much that Green Grass could hardly see anything but her tail.

“Eh, I suppose. But in a good way,” he added with another bite.

“Am I crazy?”

The next bite of cake hung in front of Green Grass’ face for a moment before suffering the same fate as the last. “Who isn’t, in one way or another. Stars, this whole town flings themselves into things no sane pony should even consider. If you’re crazy, you’re in good company.”

“I’m afraid. I don’t want to hurt anypony else. If I’m crazy, I should be in the hospital like…” The hat trembled even more and Twilight’s voice dropped an inaudible level.

The cake plate made a little scraping noise as Green Grass pushed it away and scooted closer to the occupied hat, putting one hoof reluctantly around it for support. “I’ll admit, I probably needed my time at Broadhoof as much as anypony there, but I don’t think you should be locked away, Twilight.”

“You didn’t read my file,” said the trembling hat.

“Well—” started Green Grass before the lights went out in the coffee shop and an explosion of red and green sparks outside the window shook the building. In an instant, he found the contents of Trixie’s hat propelled across the bench to clutch with an iron grip at his neck.

“Urk!”

The surrounding kitchen seemed to shimmer at the edge of her perceptions while the pipes and fittings flew into position, bursts of inspiration adding parts as sparks sprayed and molten solder splattered on her hooves and muzzle. It could have been easier if she could have just changed time in some tiny fashion, but she had promised, and Trixie would be angry if she broke her promise. She might even shout at Monster, and take away her library card, and that was too frightening to think about.

Hours had passed since she had first begun the project, and fatigue fought with the liqueur that she had been drinking, making her surroundings seem to hold still for brief periods before bursting into a flurry of activity. The tremble from the fireworks rattled the pipes and shook the walls, making her add two more flange supports to her Great and Powerful machine as it came together in a glowing assembly that dominated the room.

Trixie would be happy when she saw the finished magnificent machine and tasted the absolute perfect way it teased out every bit of flavor from the atomized coffee beans, swirling the extract through purification and transformational sections of the machine. Bitter acidic residue would be shunted to one side and disposed of while the various portions of the sweet flavorful fluid would be mixed and swirled until it would be lovingly placed in the receptacle at the end in an inky solution that defied description.

It was too bad that her friends had all gone to watch the fireworks. Otherwise the machine would be a living symbol of friendship, made with the help of all of them. Well, maybe not a living symbol. It throbbed with its own magic, consuming the beans and water in a magical matrix that powered itself, but it had no more life than Scootaloo’s scooter. Maybe the next one could be taught to live, or to extract the very essence of coffee from the universe without the need for beans or water. The potential for creation was limitless, far greater than anything she had done with her old magic that could only destroy and kill. Just little things remained to be done, and Monster dabbed a speck of paint here and tightened a clamp there on the warm body of her creation. Little bits of her coat that had been too close to the welding spell still stuck to the machine in charred brown bits here and there, as well as more than a few splatters of molten metal stuck onto her own coat, making the machine as much a part of her as she was to it. She could even call it her mechanical sister. Although it would not hug or love, it had taught her something so insightful and amazing that Monster still could not figure out just what it was. Perhaps more of the coffee liqueur would help, if she could find any of the bottles that had not been drained.

The boom and rattle of the exploding fireworks continued to shake the night air, with ‘oooh’ and ‘ahh’ from all of the watching ponies except two. Green Grass held Twilight’s file in a firm grip, reading down the page in the solid magenta glow of Monster’s horn. When another burst of crimson sparks would explode across the sky and her glow began to slacken, Green Grass would softly clear his throat, and she would concentrate again on making the light bright and constant for her teacher. She knew he was doing it just to distract her from the terrifying explosions, but in a way that was a good thing, because it showed he cared in some way.

She read along with him because she could no more resist reading the words than Pinkie Pie could keep from eating candy. There were still words in her file that she could not understand, and he pronounced them when she pointed with a trembling hoof, and even let her correct some sections that were wrong, but it made her cringe to think of her actions being judged by strangers like the fanciful stories that had been in the newspapers. It was easy to complete each page far ahead of him and fidget against his side, hoping that he would not realize that she was also slipping paper napkins under the table in her magic to mop up the wet spot she had made when the first firework had gone off. There was a lot of coffee perking around in her bloodstream that would wind up the same way if she could not get a handle on her fear and leave his warm side for the bathroom soon. When he was done, he leafed back to the psychological section and stared at it while the fireworks boomed and popped in the background.

“I suppose I have you to thank for my father’s overbearing attempt to get me married,” he said finally, although his tone was soft and gentle instead of the accusing growl that she expected. “We were in a family outing when you had that first uncontrollable Flare. Got separated from mother and father. Frost was so frightened, but both of my parents were almost incoherent. When they found out the disaster was caused by a unicorn student flaring, you would have thought my talent of teaching little unicorns magic was some sort of horrible toxin that I needed to be treated to cure.” Green Grass held her close regardless of the dampness and kissed her on the top of her hat. “I’ve seen a couple other unicorn students flare. You must have been terrified.”

golden fire descending from the sky while screaming ponies fled in panic… the lunging approach a long white horn… the feeling of damp grass against her burning flesh…

She shuddered up against his warm, shaggy coat. “A-a-almost d-died.”

“But you didn’t. You lived and you grew and you saved Princess Luna. And now you’re young again so you can grow up and live and maybe even do something more fantastic than return Princess Celestia’s sister.”

“O-or m-maybe I’ll d-destroy everypony.”

Green Grass shrugged and got out a piece of paper. “And I was going to go crazy with a cake slicer in a wedding reception. It’s not a good parallel, but I met a nice pony at the hospital who’s a wonderful talker. He really helped me, and I think you might like talking to him too.”

He finished the note and passed it to Monster, who looked at it before floating it over her shoulder and tucking it away in a wrinkle of space for later. “Is he a nice doctor?”

“Doctor? Oh, no. He’s a patient, but he has weekend passes.” Another explosive shudder went through the building as a last few fireworks thundered into the sky, and then the lights in the building came back on as the country band started to play on stage. Happy ponies stomped and swung through dance steps out in the grass, and a small twitch became obvious in Green Grass’ cheek. Following his angered gaze, she could see the spot of raspberry coloring in the crowd that matched his father’s mane, and the glitter of blue eyes watching the building. Chrysanthemum was not dancing or smiling along with the other ponies despite several visits by Pinkie, just standing in a position where he could watch both the front and the rear doors and lurk in ambush for his son.

“Is your father crazy?”

“Ye—” Green Grass caught himself in a coughing fit. “No, of course not. He just — well, he’s worried about me, I suppose, and only wants to protect me.”

“With butterflies?”

“With a wife who never leaves safe and secure Canterlot, so that I won’t ever be in danger again. I swear sometimes I think they just want to put me in a cage. A good cage,” he added quickly at Monster’s inquisitive look.

“I d-don’t like cages.” Monster trembled while huddling to his side. “When… Shining A-armor and C-cadence—” she took a shuddering breath “—used to go into the forest after me, I was afraid they were going to l-lock me up. I couldn’t see them without memories coming back, and it hurt so much, and they wanted to hold me close and make more memories come back and it would hurt more and more and—”

A ripping explosion sounded outside, punctuated by the sounds of screaming.

Weddings were boring and irritating things. Admittedly, Monster was happy that Tallgrass was marrying mom, but there still was a spark of jealousy that burned in her heart, made only worse by the constant itching of the bandages supporting her sprained ankles, which felt like they had ants crawling around under them. Mom would be upset if she found out, so Monster wrapped that spark of jealousy in an insulating layer of artificial happiness so the spirits would not be troubled, and stored that tight bundle in her chest where she could add to it as needed.

And she needed. Everything seemed to rub her the wrong way, from the way that the special ceremony that Zecora used to raise the sun was being treated as some child’s toy, to the horrible explosions in the sky that sent eye-burning sparks flying in all directions. There were even two other ponies sharing their special night with Luna: that annoying dark pegasus and her stupid husband. They were both just so happy that it leaked out all over the place, and made all of the changelings in the crowd look so goofy with those annoying little happy smiles. She never used to have to hide her emotions around mom before, but changelings cheated, and the compartmentalization of her anger needed to be perfect or they would flinch like she had stuck a pin in their flanks.

Even after the ceremony, Monster was not able to go away somewhere, preferably a dark cool root cellar where she could hide until the anger subsided. She had to be social, shaking the hooves of everypony and in particular, that annoying pink pony who seemed to just appear out of nowhere whenever Monster had found a quiet place to hide. At least holding a plate with a piece of that horribly sweet cake and a cup of nauseating pink liquid kept her at a reasonable distance, allowing Monster to lurk in the darkness under a table full of glasses and napkins.

The problem was the private place that Monster had found was not totally her own. The annoying band had struck up a horribly-loud and ear-grating musical tune that she was just starting to tolerate when a yellow and pink blur launched over several nearby ponies and dove into the darkness where Monster was hiding. Fluttershy was streaming tears as she bumped into Monster, blathering something about being chased by a horrible pony, when the skirt over the table was shoved to one side and a unicorn stallion with an obviously fake smile looked down at the two hiding ponies.

The world seemed to lurch to one side and slow.

Fluttershy gave off a tiny squeak of terror and tried to hide behind Monster.

The unicorn stallion lit his horn and began to reach with his magic.

Something inside Monster snapped.

The magical field the unicorn was generating went out like a blown candle as Monster grabbed him in her magic and slammed him sideways into a table full of punch and cake. Glass and confections went flying in all directions, moving slowly as they tumbled through the air. All around she could see surprised faces as Monster bolted out from under the table after the aggressive stallion. He was fast, driven by fear to grab a nearby table and thrust it between him and Monster.

She was faster. She blew it up.

It only took a twitch of her familiar power to explode the table into a concussive blast that flung the stallion across the grass and into another table filled with cake and punch. She could hear her voice shouting something about not hurting her friends as she grabbed him in her magic again and flung him just as hard as she could throw him.

High in the air.

In a straight line towards the nearby town hall.

She knew what was going to happen the moment she released her grasp on the hapless unicorn. His velocity was high enough that every one of his bones would shatter and snap on impact, reducing him to a bloody corpse splattered where everypony in town could see what she had done.

Who she had murdered.

Again.

Even if she wanted to save him, she could not reach her magic out that far to catch him again. Teleportation with her new magic required a calm and tranquil state of mind, while her old teleportation spell was only accurate within a fraction of a mile or so, and tore at her mind with rage.

He was going to die.

The body flailed its limbs in reflex as he flew through the air, screaming in terror. She wanted to look away, but something inside forced her to watch what she had done. To record every last moment of his life. To understand just why she needed to flee back into the Everfree Forest and never to come back. To know why she needed to leave her friends.

A sledgehammer of pain shot through her head with every beat of her heart, the familiar agony she had constantly experienced during her years in the Everfree. It seemed to welcome her into the comfort of oblivion, the difficult task of thinking discarded for simple rage and pain. Would he hit the building head-first, and be spared his own agony of shattered nerves, or impact with his rear first, and expire in horrible pain? It seemed important for some reason, but the answer never came as a blue streak trailing a rainbow contrail ascended into the sky and plucked the screaming stallion from his deadly trajectory.

“Got ‘cha!” Rainbow Dash continued to streak straight up into the sky out of hearing range, the last that could be heard was her shouting, “...and you don’t scare Fluttershy like that or I’m going to…”

There was mixed and inconsistent applause from the ponies who had not seen Monster, and a shocked silence from those who had. She staggered in pain, managing just to look back long enough to ensure Fluttershy was going to be all right before dropping to one knee and holding a hoof to her nose. It seemed to be moist and reddish in the silver light of the moon, dripping in a constant stream that smeared across her foreleg, and her mother, who had managed to scoop her up and was holding her close to her chest regardless of the blood.

“Twilight?” breathed Green Grass in stunned bemusement, trying to split his attention between the small collapsed alicorn out in the wedding party and the terrified one clutching to his hind leg. He had just looked out the window at the abrupt noise and caught the last moments of the fight when Twilight, that is this Twilight had squeaked out something about “i’msorryi’msorry” and clamped down on his hind leg like she was terrified of being thrown into a shark tank. “What’s wrong?”

“It wasn’t supposed to go wrong,” blubbered the little alicorn. “I couldn’t make up my mind on what I wanted to do and I thought it wouldn’t hurt any and I’m so sorry please don’t be mad at us and fail us and send us away!”

“Us?”

“Three,” sobbed Twilight. “One for the wedding, one for my friends, and one for my sister.”

Words failed Green Grass until he finally managed to choke out, “Dull old Ponyville. Yeah.”

A small group of worried ponies gathered outside the door to the kitchen, including Twilight Sparkle, and of course Twilight Sparkle. The first Twilight held a damp and deeply reddish cloth against her nose and seemed to twitch in a mixture of anger and embarrassment while leaning against her mother, both of whom were still streaked with blood. The second Twilight clung to Green Grass’ leg, both of whom smelled slightly of urine and spilled coffee. The Night Guard had cleared out a little breathing space in the coffee shop for the group, but it had promptly filled up by small ponies worried about their friend, regardless of how many of them there were in the room.

Princess Luna in particular took great pains to project an image of ‘things going rather well despite the explosions,’ and opened the door to the kitchen without a twitch.

The twitch came after she opened the door.

Twilight Sparkle, which was the third Twilight, lay on her back in the middle of the kitchen floor, a dark bottle upended in her mouth as if she were attempting to get the very last drop out of the bottom. Her little wings were extended for balance, and all four other limbs waved gently in a perceived breeze as she hummed in counterpoint to the soft music that filled the small room.

It only took two steps into the kitchen before Luna stopped cold, her amazement at the drunk alicorn filly nearly passed out in the middle of the floor overcome by a sense of awe at the mechanical device affixed to the wall. Little balls of magical light floated back and forth in glass and stainless steel tubing, making spirals and fractal patterns of light and darkness flow across a maze of interconnected pipes. Faint wisps of multicolored steam wafted from the device in several spots, highlighting colorful dials and spinning wheels that flashed and blinked with great abandon. It not only gurgled with the sound of coffee in the process of creation, the machine seemed to be speaking in some mechanical fashion in the background of a soft, cosmic tune without notes or meter. There was a nearly overwhelming temptation to listen to the sounds and try to make sense of them that Luna refused to yield her willpower to, moving instead to a knob labelled ‘Volume’ and turning it down to a low hum.

“Menace?” said Trixie, walking into the room along with the others. “What in Equestria did you make?”

“Coffee,” replied the little alicorn with a hiccup and a belch. “D’ya have any more of thess?”

One dark glass bottle floated up in Trixie’s general direction, and after a moment of trying to catch it, and an evaluation of how many other empty bottles were lying around the room, Trixie turned to Luna and hesitantly asked, “You said that Alicorns can regenerate about any injury, but how resistant are they to poisons such as alcohol?”

“She will be fine, but that is immaterial to the real problem we are faced with,” said Luna. “What do you see when you look at your little sisters?”

“Trouble,” responded Trixie without a moment’s hesitation. “Little Miss Feel-No-Pain there is going to encourage the rest of her little friends to start experimenting with booze. And over there—” Trixie pointed, giving only a slight twitch of guilt as the half-full bottle of bourbon in her cloak gurgled “—we’ve got a volcano just waiting to blow, and she looks impatient. And attached to the big green chicken over there, we’ve got a little chicken, who really needs to be taken to the little fillies room, I think.”

“I’m done,” squeaked Monster, not relenting in her tight grip on a somewhat damp Green Grass for an instant.

“Anyway,” said Trixie, pressing the point, “the first thing we need to do is find out what idiot taught Menace a spell to copy her—” Trixie’s face went pale as recent memories of her lesson over at the temporary town hall filtered through her memories. “Wait a minute. I just taught you a spell to copy papers, not ponies. Tell me you didn’t copy anypony else, particularly any of your friends?” A quick shake of two little identical heads and one ‘whee!’ from the third was a little reassurance for Trixie, although she did cast a quick look out into the crowd of little ponies (and one changeling) to make sure none of the colors were duplicated, and three in particular.

“Look again, Trixie Lulamoon. There is more to be concerned about than meets the eye.” Luna turned to the three identical little ponies and scooted them closer together so that Trixie could get a better look. They all stared back at her with dark purple eyes, some more bloodshot than others, but after a moment, one important similarity soaked in.

“They’re all sick. There was something wrong with the spell. That’s why they’re all so weird. None of them are copies; she split herself into three pieces.” Trixie blinked in shock. “It’s like my Puppet spell, but she’s put so much of herself into… well, herselves, she doesn’t have enough to keep herself alive.”

“Precisely,” said Luna.

“Is Twilight going to die?” Apple Bloom had stepped forward to one of the Twilight’s side and added her plaintive gaze to the rest of the little ponies, all looking at Trixie as if it were her fault.

“No, of course not,” said Trixie. “All she has to do is pull herself together, and she’ll be fine.”

“I can’t.” The three little Twilights even had their own mixture of inebriated, bitter and terrified that split their simultaneous answer into a small chorus. “I didn’t think about that when we started,” continued the angry one. “Stupid spell.”

“Well, Princess Luna can…” Trixie trailed off at Luna’s slow shaking of her head.

“What has been done was done from within. I will be powerless to affect her.”

“Well, we aren’t just giving up!” snapped Trixie. “Everypony out of the kitchen! Twilight, Twilight, Twilight, the Princess and I are going to have a study session where we are going to sit down with this problem and beat it to death with coffee and — ick — books.”

All three Twilights perked up from their dismal poses, and one of them made a move towards the newest coffee machine before being stopped by Princess Luna. “Just one moment, young Twilight Sparkle.”

Luna picked up the crystalline coffee carafe in her magic and swirled it in a slow motion that made the inky black contents curl in waves as if the night itself had been turned liquid and imprisoned in glass. A short puff of steam from the pot drifted across the surrounding ponies, leaving a trail of perked-up ears and wide eyes, and more than one adult quietly pulled out a coffee cup of their own for a taste once the Princess had finished her inspection. With one last glance at the intricate mixture of machine and magic on the wall, she tipped the pot over her own cup and watched as the dark surface of the coffee filled it. Somehow all of the light in the room seemed to be drawn towards the contents of the cup, vanishing inside without a trace other than a faint twinkle of what could have been stars in coffee.

She lifted the cup in her magic, bringing it to her lips while the onlookers held their collective breaths and stared in wonder. With a long inhaled breath, Luna relaxed, her mane and tail flowing with darkness and specks of light that seemed to swirl in synchronization with the coffee. Then she lowered her lips—

And took a sip.

Darkness swelled along her mane and tail, pouring down onto the floor and filling the room in a heartbeat with impenetrable night. Even the lights and sounds of the coffee machine faded into the distance as absolute silence encompassed the crowd, only aware of each others presence by the touch of their shoulders on each other. They could have been standing in the stygian night for minutes, or even hours, just feeling the warm darkness surrounding them all in a moment of perfect tranquility.

Then a single pinpoint of light appeared above, a tiny fierce light that cut through the darkness like a knife, but without illuminating a single thing. The light was joined by another, and another, until they appeared in tens and hundreds, stars across the vastness of ebon night, an infinite expanse of space stretching to eternity in all directions. Ever so slowly, the stars faded and the light returned, and far sooner than anypony was willing to admit, the simple walls of the kitchen once again surrounded them, but different in some fashion. It seemed real in some way beyond their comprehension, and yet as if it would blow away at the slightest breeze. In one single motion, every adult with a coffee cup put them away, tucking them into manes and saddlebags until only Pinkie Pie was left, holding out her cup with a huge grin.

“It’s so perfect,” breathed Luna, still holding her empty cup in front of her face. “The mixture of flavor and accents, the temperature, the way it clings to the cup while being consumed. Even the aftertaste does not have the slightest trace of bitterness or sour, just a reflection of the true oneness of the bean.”

“I’m officially creeped out now, Princess,” said Trixie, picking the carafe out of Luna’s magic and putting it back under the dispenser. After a moment of thought, Trixie also conjured a thick chain across the front of the glowing machine, and threw the power switch securely to the ‘off’ position.

“Even the cup is perfect,” said Luna, holding the simple porcelain cup up to the kitchen lights. “The way it holds the flavor while spreading the aroma despite its ordinary simplicity and common materials. The finest Yixing pottery would not accent the flavor in a more pleasurable fashion. And the handle. Oh, that perfect handle…”

Something was bothering Trixie about Luna’s behavior other than the obvious, but she only realized what it was when the Alicorn of the Moon gently drifted towards the back wall of the kitchen while floating a few inches above the floor, still held in the rapture of her empty coffee cup. “Not much help there any more,” muttered Trixie, and after a look at all three Twilights, she added, “or there. Looks like Plan B.”

Turning to the crowd of concerned little ponies, Trixie announced, “Do not be afraid, for I, the Great and Powerful Trixie shall put your friend back together again unharmed! First, I shall need somepony to clear off a place on stage for me to perform my act!”

“Me! Me!” shouted Snails, dashing out the door.

“Second, I shall need my hat!” A pink glow of magic lifted the purple hat from one of the Twilights, who responded by clinging even tighter to Green Grass’ leg.

“And thirdly, I shall need Peep Sprout to get—” Trixie paused in a dramatic pose “—the Box.”

“Right!” Peep dashed for the door, but paused before leaving. “What do you need the box for?”

“What do I need the box for?” said Trixie in response. “Why, that is no ordinary box. With that box, and my amazing power, I shall do what no unicorn has ever done before. I shall take these three ordinary fillies and transmogrify them back into her original form! Now go! And, bring the box back here.” She gestured to where Green Grass had crumpled almost to the floor. “I think Twilight wants something to hide under when we all go up to the stage.”

Watching the little changeling dart away, Trixie grinned at the rest of her small audience. “Now if somepony will tie a string onto Princess Balloona over there and pull her out to the stage—” Trixie slanted her hat down over her eyes “—It’s showtime!”

Credit to Trout Fishing in America - A Proper Cup of Coffee

Inspiration for the coffee machine provided by Girl Genius and Phil Foglio.

Luna’s Lab by Muffinexplosion on Deviant Art