A feminine face coalesces from mists that seem to stretch on forever; eyes glowing faint blue against the background of an unmoving porcelain white mask. “The noble fat man, Iroh, son of Azulon has pleased me greatly.,” her melodious voice proclaimed, echoing through the void.

“He uses his gifts to defend life, to promote peace and balance regardless of who disturbs that balance. However, he defended one of our own -- the incarnation of Moon and held his fellow fire benders back to give the time needed for her rebirth.”

Dissipating the fog high above her, four green eyes blazed to life set on a colossal, craggy face. “The blaze amongst the lotus has done very well for himself indeed,” its resonating voice boomed, cacophonous as an avalanche,. “He earns favour before the stone as well, Bowu. His loyalty to the son of his brother is commendable, misplaced though it might be. He brings power and wisdom, a rare combination indeed,-- especially for a mortal.”

“And the brewed leaves! Don't forget the lovely, tasty, delicious, amazing, tasty brewed leaves!” An odd hairless creature shouted from atop the giant’s shoulder, his dancing form like a demented, hairless, flying lemur, his eyes shining with a mirthful yellow tint.

“You said ‘tasty’ twice there, Nian.” The giant chided, sounding slightly amused with his hyperactive passenger.

“It’s super tasty, Luanshi! Can you not smell its magnificence every time he boils a cup? Tay-ay-yay-STY!” Nian stopped his capering for a moment so he could hug himself at the thought of capturing the delectable steam from Iroh’s cup.

“Yes,” Bowu purred, her face unmoving despite her obviously bemused tone, “we must not forget that marvelous vice of his.But that is not what brings me here today. I wish to grant this mortal a boon, an indulgence if you must. However, I will likely need your assistance.”

“What boon would this be, Keeper of Mist?” the rumbling, sonorous voice of the colossal Luanshi queried, using his fellow spirit’s formal title,. “What would you desire to grant this favoured one amongst mortals?”

"Ooh! A wiiish!" The ecstatic shriek of the impish Nian came, “A wishwish wish-wish WIIISH!" the cavorting was quite audible, even when the demented dancer was barely visible from atop his perch. "Uhhh..." It paused in its dance, "what wish we give the fleshling?"

The combined sounds of two exasperated groans echoed through the mists.

"That is a very good question," grumbled the ephemeral spirit of the mists, "Do either of you two have any idea? Hmmm...” hummed the spirit as she thought to herself.

"Why not make the wish something simple?" Carefully reasoned the largest of the three,. "Let's say, the first wish that passes the mortal’s lips that we have the power to grant. I will most certainly add some of my own might to this worthy cause."

"You would lend your power for my boon?" the lovely voice was shocked. "What an excellent notion, as it gives the mortal a little control, even if he does not know it. It also gives us a way to give him something he wants, and adds just enough mischief to give us some entertainment." She was all but chuckling with glee at the thought of something new and interesting to do.

"Me help too! Me help too!" the impish one called out. "You give wish direction, he gives wish much power, me give wish SPIN! Lovely spiiin spin-spinspinspin spin! Hehe... Spin..."

As the smallest one started his dance again, the other two spirits did not know whether to hang their heads in shame or laugh at his antics. "What, pray tell, do you mean by ah, spin?" The giant inquired bemusedly.

"Wish is like a ball," the reedy voice of the imp chortled, "We give power to make wish bounce far, we use aim to make wish hit the right target, but spin! Lovely, lovely spin make wish change on own, give wish life of its own, make wish bouncy and FUN! Fuuuun! Funfunfun-funfun FUN!"

"That is all well and good," the giant began, "but wha...”

"SSHH!!" the imp stopped dancing to interrupt. "Me smell fun coming! Lookie-look at scrying pool!"

The three huddled around a nearby mirror-like pool, curious to see what the pesky little creature smelled with that stubby little nose of his.

The scene in the pool shifted, first over a village before dropping down to focus on a pair of men.

Meanwhile, in the hills east of Gaipan, the pair were unaware of their audience.

An old man, his beard split into three prongs and greyed with age, smiled lightly as he hefted his pack.

The younger man, his nephew was significantly less cheerful, the left side of his face heavily scarred and a deep scowl set on his face as he slogged ahead of his uncle down the muddy trail.

"Uncle, something bothers me.," the younger man grumbled.

"Zuko, great many things bother you. Perhaps we should stop and make some tea so we can talk it over.," Iroh chuckled amiably, already reaching for the iron teapot tied to the side of his pack.

"Now is not the time for your tea, Uncle. I just want to know-- why do you follow me? I know you have no interest in capturing the Avatar. You were never even officially exiled. So why? What is it you are after?"

"You are interesting to follow, Zuko. Very entertaining for an old man like me, but you are right, there is something I would rather be doing. You could say that I do some of that even now as we are travelling. I am looking for a nice place to settle down for my remaining years. Maybe open a little tea shop and play some Pai Sho while I am at it." Iroh broke into a grin at the thought of playing Pai Sho every day.

Zuko rolled his eyes. His dotty old Uncle Iroh's love for tea and Pai Sho were almost great enough to eclipse his previous fame as the General Iroh, the Dragon of the West, the first General to have ever breached the walls of the very city they were headed for, Ba Sing Se.

"I just wish," his uncle continued to ramble, unaware three spirits' ethereal grins were widening as they leaned closer, to better to hear his desire, "that I could find somewhere like that, someplace nice where they have never heard of the Dreaded General Iroh, Where I could find some peace and spend my days as I choose. Is that so much to ask?"

The three spirits gathered around the scrying pool cheered, unheard by the boy and his uncle. Together they began a chant, casting their spell to give Iroh his wish, or at least the best they could manage...

Trudging on, Zuko didn't even register the lack of noise behind him as Iroh faded out of sight and away from that plane of existence.

Zuko sighed. “It sounds nice Uncle. Nice, but not for me. You do realize how hard it is going to be to find a village like that in the Earth Na..." Zuko trailed off as he turned his head to look over his shoulder.

Behind him, there was no one. Iroh had disappeared. Retracing his steps cautiously, Zuko walked back along the trail a few dozen paces, only to find his uncle's footprints ended abruptly. No sign of a struggle, no sign of leaving the path for a tea break. Nothing.

"Uncle?" Zuko called out, on guard against an ambush; maybe some sort of Earth bender trap.

Seeing and hearing no one nearby, he called louder this time, hoping it was just some kind of crazy joke on his elder’s part. "Uncle!"

"UNCLE!"

With a clap of thunder, a small hole tore open in midair. Several nearby ponies screamed in fright, causing many others to duck for cover or flee the park altogether.

The hole sat there a moment before widening and firing a large, spinning, brown and green ball with a belch, before shrinking back in on itself, and finally vanishing from sight.

The ball hit the fish pond with a crunch, skipping once, twice, and hitting a blackberry bush on the lake's shore with a resounding crash and the clatter of pots and pans before revealing itself to be a pair of legs hanging limply from one side of the shrubbery.

A grey pony nearby, much more used to sudden loud noises than most of the other ponies in the park thanks to her extraordinarily noisy roommate, stood from where she had been sitting on the grass and approached the bush, eyeing the strange legs carefully before parting the bush with her hooves to look inside.

The grey mare looked inside, only to pull her head out and blink her eyes in bewilderment.

Taking a second look to make sure she wasn’t hallucinating, she turned to scan the faces in the crowd, remembering a quirk of one of her fellow musicians. An often annoying quirk at that.

It didn’t take her long at all to spy the bright green form of the resident lyrist and amateur xenobiologist.

"Oh Lyra!" she called out, "I think this needs a little of your expertise on the matter, and I am not talking about your harp!"

"What are you talking about Octavia? I play the lyre, not the ha... ha... hah..." Lyra's annoyed voice trailed off as she looked into the bush that was being held open by the cellist.

Her jaw dropped and her eyes widened. Within seconds she was so stiff she could easily have been mistaken for a cockatrice victim.

Octavia smirked at the suddenly catatonic minty-green unicorn, ‘Yep, that’s probably a human.’ she thought to herself.

She turned back to the curiously watching crowd. "Can I get a couple of unicorns to help get this creature out of the bush? It looks like he needs some assistance to get out of there, and it does not seem like Lyra will be able to help." She couldn't help but grin wryly as she glanced back at her sometimes annoying colleague.

Stepping forward, several unicorns coordinated to pry the bush apart and levitate the thoroughly scratched and bruised human out and onto the grass.

Octavia eyeballed the human again before looking at the freshly hesitant crowd and the statue-like form of Lyra, still stuck unmoving in front of the bush.

Octavia massaged her nose with a hoof, as she grumbled to herself that she just knows she is going to regret this. Kneeling down, she nosed the human over her head and neck to rest on her back. Grimacing at his weight, she started a steady trot towards the hospital.

"You better be friendly," Octavia groused as the crowd parted before her, shying away from contact with Iroh, "because you are certainly not light... ugh!"

On an ethereal plane slightly to the left of Equis, two spirits glared down at their excitable counterpart, their displeasure with the little imp readily apparent.

"Uhhh..." Niam stammered as his large ears drooped in embarrassment. He held up his thumb and fore claw a few millimetres apart "Too much spin?"

Author's Notes:

I somehow managed to acquire an editor from Overly Extensive Editors. Much thanks to IRpony, I will be replacing chapters with newer, edited versions as they are finished.