Bit by Bit
by Knight Tyrfang
First published
A Human get's into Equestria, and does some part time jobs. Pandemonium insues.
John D. Bulbmyn, or 'Dim Bulb', as he's known as with his 'associates', get's transported to Equestria by one of Twilight's experimental spells. When there, he discovers that the currency that the ponies use, bits, are made of solid gold, and begins to find ways to make as much money as he can, to pay off debts he owe back at home on Earth. Will he succeed, and turn Ponyville upside down in the process? Or will he fail, and still turn Ponyville upside down in the process?
Introduction
Introduction
There’s a story that floats around Ponyville, about a pony with a special cutie mark that nopony could identify. They say that he was a polite, clever, and likeable pony that seemed to know more than the average citizen of Equestria. He introduced many new concepts to the residents of Ponyville. He made a magic potion with beneficial effects, fun games that forced one to concentrate, and even new and unique recipes that satisfied one’s palate in a strange way. However, the story of that pony has been twisted, and changed a lot over time. Embellishments were made to many events that happened, and anything that made this simple pony look like a fool was omitted. Some of these embellishments were to the point that you would think that he was as influential to Ponyville, as Star-Swirl The Bearded was to magic. The tale was changed to the point that it made him sound grand, and impressive, like many ponies of historical significance. Let me tell you how that story truly happened, starting from the time before that pony, wasn’t a pony…
Prologue
Prologue
“Argh! It just doesn’t work!” roared a man in despair, to nobody in particular.
With such fury, he crumpled up a piece of paper with a bunch of seemingly random numbers and lines written all over it, and threw it over his shoulder in disgust. It soared through the air on a well-traveled path, and landed next to a trash bin holding more than it was designed for. With a pencil in his mouth, which was almost chewed through completely, he gazed at his scarred up desk with frustration. He then brought his forehead to the desk with a large crash, a usual practice of his when things become too much.
“Nothing! Nothing works! And anything that does work, has already been done!” he shouted again, rubbing his throbbing forehead, and spitting out the now broken pencil.
There really wasn’t anybody to shout at. He was the only one living in that small room that he called his apartment. It wasn’t really pleasant within that room. A musty scent hung in the air that would remind people of a nursing home, thanks to the dust and mold growing everywhere. If you were to take a step, it would have been followed quickly by the quiet sound of the crumpling of paper. Once in a while, the sound of crumpling paper would be replaced with the large crunch of an empty, disposable food container. The walls were stained with liquids of varying shades of colors, the result of failed ideas to be sent to businessmen as investment ideas. It was quite dim in the room as well, lit only by the sunlight streaming weakly through the curtains. There was a lamp on his desk, but the man didn’t bother turning it on. After all, the bulb was blackened, and burnt out.
With a great sigh, the man sat up. He looked to his right, where a tattered calendar hung on the wall, stained with who-knows-what. On it, were several images of cats, one for each month. The cats all had a look on their faces that looked like they were thinking “Really? You’re going to put me in this dumb dress, and then take a picture of it? If I could reach you, I’d scratch your face right now…” On the calendar, in pencil, February 23rd was circled. That was the man’s deadline to pay-back the loans he owed to his “investors” from his previous escapade. He had no money to pay them back, and the due date was just two days away.
“Well…Maybe I could sell my apartment? I could pay off a very small percentage of my debt, enough to push them back for a while…” the poor man thought desperately. He wondered how hard it was to live within a cardboard box, and thought it would probably be just the same quality of life as of now.
Though, it’d probably be the same quality of life, the man didn’t want to live in a box. It’d probably be leakier, and it would get pretty cramped at points. That was bad, since he was very claustrophobic. So, it was back to his desk again, frantically scrambling to find a new pencil, so he can create a new get rich quick plan.
“I will make money, even if it’s the last thing I do… On my honor of being a Bulbmyn.” muttered the man under his breath as he wrote, calculating how much money he would need to get the supplies he needed for his last ditch plan.
See, this man is called John D. Bulbmyn, the son of one of the richest families in the city he lived. Though he’s a Bulbmyn, the family name’s been forgotten. His family had gone bankrupt earlier, thanks to the recent recession. He was taught at an early age that wealth was power, and the fact his family went bankrupt, he was disowned from his family as a way to cut expenses, and deep debt was making him suffer, strengthened that fact. However, that name had no meaning to anyone, other than him. So let’s call him by what he’s more commonly referred to…
There was a sudden, loud, rapping knock at the door, and the man almost fell out of his rickety chair in surprise. He wasn’t expecting anyone to be visiting, especially at this hour. The few people that he knew would usually be at work this early in the afternoon. He picked up some trash off of the dusty floor, and tossed it into the small trash bin in the corner that stood next to his cot. Most of it ended up on the floor again, since the bin was already overflowing before he added more to it.
Unlocking the dead bolt with a small clank, he opened the door with a rattle, leaving the chain still on. He peeked outside, and his heart dropped with a splash, right into his stomach. Outside, was a face he was hoping he wouldn’t see for the next two days.
“Yo, Dim-Bulb. I just dropped in to check-up on you.” Said a porky, balding man wearing a clean linen suit. “You got the money ready for the collection date?”
“Y-yeah, yeah. I definitely have it.” The man lied nervously. “Just… making sure I have the right amount, and nothing’s missing…”
“Good. Just remember, if you don’t got it, the boss ain’t gonna be too happy wit’ you. And ya know what the boss does to those he ain’t happy wit’.” The other, fatter man said, glaring through the crack in the door. Pounding a brass knuckle into his palm, he then turned and left. A few minutes later, the man could be heard moaning about how he shouldn’t have pounded so hard into his hand. Then, the man was left alone in silence again.
Closing the door, he sank to his knees. Then, weakly pounding it, on the verge of tears, he cursed at his misfortune, and his stupidity. The man knew that getting money to fund his ideas from the local gang-lords was the worst decision of his life, but at the time, he was extremely desperate. There was nobody to turn to for help, and he had an empty wallet in his pocket. The moment he had been disowned, his ‘friends’ had abandoned him, wanting nothing to do with “a poor, pathetic commoner.” He was homeless, starving, and miserable.
Now, Dim was in bigger trouble then when he was starving to death. Not only is the gang threatening to rough him up if he doesn’t pay them back, they would put him in the hospital and pay for it until he got better. Not out of compassion, but because dead people don’t pay off loans. They also nicknamed him Dim-Bulb. The name wasn’t even that creative, seeing that his last name was ‘Bulbmyn’. But they called him that for the sole fact that he was “dim” and he always made a stupid mistake to mess up any business plan he created. The name stopped stinging him after he messed up a plan for the fourth or fifth time..
Dejectedly, he shuffled back to his desk, and just stared blankly at its surface. He then started to trace the scratches all over it, made from accidental gouging. A knife really does slip easily when one is trying to trim a solid block of wood, he found out, since the desk was previously owned by an amateur wood carver. He got it from one of the piles of garbage, collecting in front of his neighbors’ houses.
“I wonder…will I ever escape this horrible life? Can I even be happy?” Dim thought, with great sadness. “Maybe if I had a little more money, I could pay off these debts, find a nice house, and even find a nice lady. But, I gotta pay off this loan first…”
He put his head on his desk again, and sighed. Suddenly, his chest started hurting badly. At first he thought it was gas, and started to get up to head to the bathroom. However, his legs wouldn’t move, and they felt numb. The numbness was slowly creeping up his leg, up to his thigh. At that moment, Dim knew he was having a heart attack. He was about to quickly drag himself to the phone to call 911, but he just remembered that his phone line was cut recently, due to lack of payment. Again.
“Great…I’m going to die. I’m twenty-three years old, and I’m going to die of a heart attack… Damn the creators of microwave dinners!” And then, as the numbness reached his chest, he blacked out.
Chapter 1
Chapter 1
In what felt like a few hours later, Dim heard something, and stirred. At first, he thought he was dead, his consciousness floating about in nothingness. However, he felt something pressing on his side. That either meant he was lying down, or being crushed by something. The former seemed more feasible, for to be crushed, he had to be feeling excruciating pain. This just felt like an uncomfortable, hard surface. Then, he realized that if he felt something, it meant that he was not dead, but in fact, alive. At least, he thought he was. He really had no idea what came after death. Dim then came to the realization, that his head felt like it was being crushed by a vice, squeezing tighter and tighter, making his brain feel like it’s going to pop. He heard the sound again, and to him, it sounded like two people talking. Their voices sounded really dull and muted, as though they were talking behind a thick glass wall.
“Twilight, it worked! I knew it would work, after all, you are the most talented unicorn in all of Ponyville!”
“Ponyville? Where have I heard that name before…?” Dim thought groggily. He still didn’t feel like opening his eyes yet, since he felt as though he had been hit with a steel baseball bat. The voices then spoke again, but they sounded clearer this time.
“Oh, stop it Spike. It was just simple teleportation. I’ve done that before.”
“Yeah, but who knew you could teleport ponies from other lands! Do you think he has x-ray vision? Or breathes fire?”
“Ponies?” thought Dim again, confused. He had no idea what was going on. His head was still pounding, and he swore he could hear a bee flying around somewhere.
“Uh, doubtful. You need to stop reading those comic books, Spike… Anyways…he does appear to be unconscious…”
The pounding in his head subsided shortly, and Dim slowly opened his eyes to find himself face to face with… a pony. The pony was strangely light purple, and had a long dark mane, with what looked like a pink and purple highlight. Its tail matched its mane in color, and style. It was also long, and dark, with a single stripe of pink and purple.
“Oh, good! You’re awake!” said the pony, looking relieved. “I’m Twilight Sparkle, and-”
Dim yelped in shock, and quickly scrambled away from the pony until he hit a wall. “W-what the hell?! A purple pony?! And it talks?!” he exclaimed, sweating a little.
“Uh, well, duh? How is that surprising? I mean, you’re a pony too.” said what looked like a large, purple scaled lizard. It had green spines running down its back, and was also standing on its hind legs. That just made Dim freak out even more.
“A talking lizard too?!” Dim said, his heart pounding quickly within his chest.
“Lizard?” said the little lizard, clearly irritated. “I’m a dragon!”
“A dragon?! What?! Dragon’s don’t exist!” Dim said, frantically. “And what are you talking about?! I’m not a pony, I’m a human! See, I don’t have hooves, I have ha-”
He lifted up one of his hands to show that he was human. Instead, something yellow, and solid came into view. At first, Dim was stunned. He shook it a few times, to see if it was a trick. Nothing happened. He then tried to move his fingers. Again, nothing happened. It took a few seconds for Dim to realize what he was seeing.
“AAUGH! WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO MY HANDS?!” Dim shouted, his blood running cold. He stared at his hooves in horror. If anything else would have happened to him, he would’ve passed out from shock.
“Sheesh, this guy sure likes freaking out, doesn’t he?” the lizard said, mumbling under his breath.
“Calm down! Why are you panicking so much about your hooves?” the pony said, concerned.
“Well, I don’t know, maybe it’s because I normally don’t have hooves?!” said Dim, glaring at the pony.
“Don’t normally have hooves?” said the lizard, now looking slightly confused. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
It seemed to mean something to the purple pony, because she (Dim assumed it was a she) let out a small “Uh-oh.”
“Uh-oh? Why Uh-oh?” said the lizard, worried. “Is he going to explode? ”
“No, of course not. It’s actually nothing really…I guess I wasn’t concentrating hard enough, and instead of casting a spell that summons a pony from another land, I think I may have accidentally casted a spell that summons one from another land, as a pony…” said the pony, looking sheepish.
“Oh…That is Uh-oh.” said the lizard, looking significantly less worried.
“Wh-what’s going on?!” said Dim, still panicking, but not as frantically as earlier. “Where am I? Why do I have these… hoof things?!”
“Well, to start, you’re in the land of Equestria. And, well…I made a mistake while casting a spell, so now you’re a pony.” said the purple pony.
“Equestria? That also sounds familiar…” thought Dim. He then suddenly realized why the name seemed to ring a bell.
“Oh my god…She looks exactly like one of those characters from that cartoon. What was it called… My Little Pony?” Dim thought. He didn’t really know much about the show, and he certainly didn’t watch it. But he had heard a little bit about it from a friend of his back in college, before he dropped out.
“O-okay, I see.” Dim said, calming down more significantly. Now that he knew what was going on, and where he was, he was able to take a better look at his surroundings. It still amazed him that he was in a land based on a television show (“or was it the other way around?” Dim wasn’t sure). Everything was colored brightly, and things seemed to be lit differently as well. Most of the colors of things didn’t transition into different shades, so much as stayed the relatively same color. He then realized that he was in what looked like a large, circular library made entirely of wood, with shelves lining the circular room. The shelves were chock full of books of varying sizes. There were ladders on wheels propped up against the shelves, reaching up to the top shelf to allow people to get books from up there. He then realized the room was round and wooden, because he it was made from a tree, based on the rings on the floor. Dim couldn’t help but wonder if the combination of a library, and it being a tree, made it a severe fire-hazard. A glint caught the corner of his eye, and it made him notice a mirror. He attempted to walk over to it.
“Um, Spike? Do you know what he’s trying to do?” the pony asked, confused by the way Dim was moving.
“I dunno Twilight. Maybe, he’s trying to get to that mirror that just came in today?” Spike said. “I just hope he doesn’t do anything to it…I spent hours polishing the thing…”
Dim was having a bit of trouble, as he was trying to walk over to the mirror. At first, he was able to stand up for a few seconds, but then he fell down immediately on his face. The pony and lizard looked at each other, confused, then gave Dim some weird looks, but he ignored them. He gave up after the 3rd face plant, and instead, crawled to the mirror. Looking into the mirror, what he saw made him almost have another panic attack.
In the mirror, there stood another pony staring back at him. The pony had a sort of dull, mustard colored coat, and a short mane that was his hair color, a dark hazelnut. Strangely enough, its mane had a green highlight in it. He noticed that the pony also had a short tail that matched it’s mane in color. Dim raised a hand above his head, and the pony lifted its corresponding hoof as well. When he stuck his tongue out, the pony did as well.
Dim gave a sigh (so did the pony). He really had turned into a weird, oddly colored pony. He shook his head (as did the pony), surprised at himself at how fast he had recovered from his freak session, which was only natural. Being turned into a cartoony animal wasn’t exactly a common occurrence.
“Um, if you’ve calmed down enough, could you give us your name?” asked the pony.
“Oh, um, okay…” said Dim, a little hesitant. “My name’s Dim-Bulb.”
“Ack! Why’d I say that stupid nickname?” thought Dim, annoyed. But before he could correct himself, the pony spoke.
“Dim Bulb? That seems like a pretty normal name, for somepony that wasn’t normally a pony.” the pony said, “My name is Twilight Sparkle, and this here is my assistant.”
“‘Sup? I’m Spike.” said the little lizard.
“It’s nice to meet you, Twilight and Spike…I guess.” Dim said, deciding it’d be easier to go with his nick-name here. He found it funny that, a name like John, that was usually a very common name, would be considered strange here. “So, why exactly am I here in… Equestria? And as a pony as well?”
“Well, Twilight here kind of messed up on a spell. But we can fix it, since Twilight can fix anything magic related! ... Right?” said Spike semi-confidently.
“Spell? What’s he talking about?” Dim thought, confused.
“Um, I don’t know about that, actually…If I knew what you were before I accidentally turned you into a pony, it might help me figure out a solution.” said Twilight, trying to think of ideas that might work.
“Alright then, fine. I was a human.” answered Dim quickly, just wanting to get out of that room. The colorfulness of everything was starting to make him feel kind of sick.
Twilight and Spike both just stared at him blankly.
“Um…did I say it too fast?” Dim said, worried by the fact that humans may not even be a concept in this world. “I said I was human, you know, H as in horse, U as in-”
“No, we heard you alright.” said Spike. “By ‘human’, do you mean those hairless monkey things? Y’know, the ones that always walk on their hind legs?”
“Um…yeah, basically…I guess?” said Dim, a bit confused by how the question was phrased.
Spike looked at Twilight with an incredulous and excited look. “I thought humans didn’t exist! Are you sure this guy’s not crazy?”
Twilight shook her head. “I thought so too, but the way he reacted to his ‘hands’ being hooves seemed genuine to me.”
“Oh, good, you know exactly what I am.” said Dim, giving a small sigh of relief. “So, does that mean you can fix this?”
“I’m afraid not…” Twilight said, apologetically, “I don’t know how I’m going to teleport you back to where you came, because I don’t even know where that is. Even if you described it to me in full, it wouldn’t tell me where it was.”
“Oh…” Dim said, dejectedly, his spirits falling. He knew that that meant, he wasn’t going home.
Twilight bit her lip. “We… might be able to find a solution, but it’ll probably take a few weeks.”
“There’s still hope then!” thought Dim, his spirits rising, but only slightly. Suddenly, he had a realization. He was going to be away from his home for a few weeks, and in another world no less. That meant he had more time to pay back the mafia, and they wouldn’t have to come and beat him up.
“Oh, that’s great then!” said Dim, a grin playing on his face. “At least I’ll be able to go home…eventually.”
“Well, I can see he’s going to stick around for a while, so why don’t we show him around Ponyville?” suggested Spike. “We could even give him a lesson or two on how Equestria works!”
“Good idea Spike. We’ll show you around Ponyville, so you can get used to living here for a few weeks. I could probably introduce you to my friends too.” Twilight said, agreeing. She looked a little excited. “And it’ll be fun teaching you about how the way things work in Equestria.”
“Hmm…Doesn’t sound like a bad idea…” mumbled Dim, “I could get some things off my mind.” But in his head, he was thinking: “Oh great, learning. I had enough of that in college…”
“Then it’s settled! Let’s take you on a tour of Ponyville!” said Twilight, clapping her hooves together. “We just need to make some preparations first, so go wait by the door, Dim.”
Dim attempted to go to the door, but he just ended up falling on his face first again.
“Er, maybe we should teach him how to walk properly first…” said Spike, wincing.
Dim rubbed his nose, face red with embarrassment.
Chapter 2
Chapter 2
It took a few minutes for Dim to get used to walking on all fours, but after he learned how to, he quickly grasped the concept of how to canter, and then how to gallop. It obviously felt quite different, compared to walking on two feet, but he felt significantly more nimble. He wondered if it was because he was now an equine.
After Dim learned how to walk, they were just about ready to go out and tour Ponyville. Twilight had Spike make a considerably long list of all the major landmarks and important places within Ponyville, while she quickly scanned through a book that was titled Equestria For Foals. Dim noticed, the cover of the book was designed quite similar to the For Dummies series back home. He had about three copies from it, including “Economics For Dummies, Chemistry For Dummies, and Evading Bookies For Dummies”. He also had the oddest feeling that the last book wasn’t published legally.
After she and Spike were done, Twilight quickly checked a piece of parchment lying on her writing table. “Oh, great! It’s going to be a beautiful day today.”
Dim, curious, looked at the parchment, and saw that on it was a list of what the weather was going to be for the following week. He assumed it was a weather forecast, but it seemed odd to him that the worn parchment was titled: “Weather Schedule”.
“Um, Twilight? What’s this?” Dim asked, curious.
“Hmm? Oh, that’s just the schedule for the weather this week.” Twilight said, taking a final sweep of Spike’s list. After she finished, she made two check marks with a quill. One on “Make a List” and one on “Double Check the List”.
“Schedule? What’s that supposed to mean?” Dim asked.
Spike cleared his throat, and opened a dictionary he was holding. “’Schedule: A plan for carrying out a process or procedure, giving lists of-‘”
“I know what a schedule is.” Dim said, cutting him off.
“Oh…okay.” Spike said. He then went to the shelves, and climbed one of the ladders to put the dictionary back where he got it from.
“What I don’t understand is, how can you ‘schedule’ the weather? Isn’t it unpredictable?” Dim asked, directing the question towards Twilight.
“Unpredictable?” said Twilight, surprised. “Oh, does the weather work differently where you come from?”
“Um, depends on what you mean by ‘differently’.” Dim said, confused by the concept of weather working differently in a different world. “It just… changes, on its own. We’re only able to use tools to predict what’ll happen. It’s pretty accurate, but not accurate enough to create a schedule around it.”
“Hey, that’s just like the Everfree Forest!” Spike said from the top of a ladder.
“Everfree Forest? Well, it’s obviously a forest, but what kind of name is that…?” Dim thought.
“It certainly does, doesn’t it?” Twilight said. “Wait… humans have tools that can predict the weather? How do they work? …Actually, never mind, I can ask you that later. See… Here in Ponyville, the weather doesn’t actually change by itself. Instead, we have pegasi regulating the weather. Moving clouds, making it rain, and so on. They hand out a schedule of what they have to do every week.”
“Pegasi? As in, winged horses?” asked Dim.
Twilight nodded. “They’re just one of the three races of ponies that live in Equestria.”
“Ponies regulating the weather…Heh, what’s next, magic?” mumbled Dim, chuckling at the idea.
“Um, yeah, actually…” Twilight said sheepishly. “That’s what the third race does, the unicorns. They use magic to help them do things around their daily lives.”
“…Wait, seriously?” Dim said, taken aback that his little quip was actually an accurate observation. After some thought, it didn’t seem as far-fetched as he first thought, seeing as he did live in a world dominated by colorful, talking ponies. He did hear them talking about spells earlier, but Twilight looked like a perfectly normal pony to him. He then noticed there was a horn on Twilight’s head, previously obscured by her bangs (Dim couldn’t help but wonder, would you still call them bangs if they were part of a mane?) He then asked, wanting some visible proof, “Well, if that’s true, then can you show me some magic?”
“Well…I don’t know if I should…” Twilight said hesitantly.
“Hey, why don’t we show him that trick? You know, Number 25!” Spike said, looking quite eager.
Twilight smiled, amused. “Sure… I guess it wouldn’t hurt.”
Twilight then closed her eyes in concentration, and then pointed her horn at Spike. Dim watched in amazement as her horn glowed, and then with a small poof, a curly black mustache appeared on Spike’s upper lip.
“Wow, that’s amazing!” Dim said, clapping his hooves together. Doing that worked more effectively for clapping then he thought it would, making a clopping noise every time he patted them together.
“I know, doesn’t it look cool?” Spike said, stroking his mustache proudly.
“Not that… it kind of looks odd on you, in all honesty…” Dim said. Spike stopped stroking his mustache, and it drooped a little. “I mean the magic! Can you do other stuff as well?”
Twilight blushed a little from the praise. “Well, I can levitate things, but that’s a simple spell a unicorn learns when they’re a little foal.”
“That’s incredible!” Dim said, wide eyed with amazement.
“Not really… it’s quite simple.” Twilight said, shaking her head. “…I take it that humans don’t have magic, do they?”
Dim shook his head. “Nope, we have none whatsoever. All we have are magic tricks, like pulling a rabbit out of a hat.”
“Oh, Twilight can do that too.” Spike said, with a look of pride. He looked so proud, you’d think he was the one who was able to do all that magic.
“Yeah, well, the rabbit is usually just hidden in a box under a table cloth, while the hat had a hole in it. It wasn’t exactly magic, but it tricks one to believe it to be.” said Dim
“Ah, I see… An illusion… We should write this all down later. I mean, it all seems so fascinating.” Twilight said, looking genuinely intrigued. “This is probably the only time in history, that anypony has first-hand, accurate info on humans!”
“I feel like I’m some kind of newly discovered animal…Come to think of it, I technically am…” Dim thought, feeling uncomfortable.
“Anyways, we should really show you around. Let’s start off with the Town Hall.” Said Twilight, making the door open with magic. It still amazed Dim that it opened on its own.
“…By the way, Dim, what’s your cutie mark, anyways? I can’t figure out what it could be...” Twilight said while they were trotting towards their first stop in the tour.
“Huh? Cutie mark? What’s that?” asked Dim. He couldn’t help but think that if he had something like that, his masculinity level would go down many levels. The sound of it was so… girly.
“It’s a mark that’s located on your flank. We aren’t born with it, but it usually appears when we discover our special talent.” Twilight said, turning and showing him hers. There indeed was a mark, and it looked like a large pink star, surrounded by a few little stars. “See, a cutie mark usually represents a pony’s special talent. Mine represents my talent with magic, and my love of astronomy.”
“Huh, really?” Dim said. He turned his head to look at his flank to see what was on it. On it…was a dim light-bulb. He would’ve smacked his forehead in disbelief, but he thought it’d probably hurt if he did it with a hoof. Dim wondered if stupidity could even be a talent.
“Hmm? Anything wrong?” Twilight asked, noticing Dim was frowning.
“H-huh? O-oh, it’s… nothing. A-anyways, I actually don’t know what it is…” Dim said, lying. He lied to both cover his embarrassment, and because he doubted they even knew what a light bulb was. Seeing as the only detectable light source he saw so far was a candle stick on the desk, back at Twilight’s house, it was very unlikely they even had electricity. Twilight looked at him carefully, but decided to drop the subject.
“Anyways, if that’s what a cutie mark is, how come Spike doesn’t have one?” Dim asked.
“Didn’t you listen? Only ponies have them. I’m a dragon.” Spike explained, rolling his eyes.
“Oh, right… but I still don’t believe you’re a dragon, you’re too small!” Dim said, still skeptical.
“Well, that’s because he’s still a baby dragon.” Twilight said. “If you want, he can breathe fire to prove it.”
Spike then took a deep breath, and then belched. A short stream of green fire came out of his mouth with the burp. Dim blinked a few times, surprised, but impressed as well.
“Huh, I guess you really are a dragon then.” Dim said, shaking his head in amazement. “Though, it’s hard to believe you’re a baby dragon, Spike. You seem more mature then that.”
Spike puffed out his chest with pride, head held a little higher. Twilight couldn’t help but smile, and roll her eyes.
So, Dim followed Twilight and Spike around, as they showed him around Ponyville. They visited the Town Hall first. It did sort of have a town hall like feeling to Dim. It was a large, tall, round building, that was quite pointy. There were also many windows set in rows, so he couldn’t tell how many floors there were. There was a second floor porch, held up by beams connecting to the ground, and surrounded by a fence. There was also a podium set to the side of the entrance. As they came closer to it, a mare noticed them, and approached them. The mare had a tan colored coat, and had a short, flowing grey mane. Dim doubted that was from age however, because she seemed quite young to him (for a pony that is. He really had no way of telling the age difference between ponies, besides wrinkles, and he spotted no wrinkles). On her flank, was a rolled up piece of parchment tied with a green ribbon.
“Oh, Twilight! It’s good to see you.” she said, “I see you’ve been practicing your magic.”
“Huh?” Twilight said, confused. The mare pointed at Spike, and Twilight noticed he still had a mustache on. “Oh, haha, yeah... Looks like I forgot to get rid of it...” She said in embarrassment. And with another poof, she made the mustache disappear.
“Aw, darn it. I was hoping you wouldn’t notice…” Spike said, disappointed.
The mare then noticed Dim. “Oh? You’re a face I’ve never seen. Are you new to Ponyville?” the mare asked.
“Oh, this here’s Dim Bulb. Dim, this is Ponyville’s Mayor.” said Twilight introducing him to the mayor.
“Dammit, the nickname’s spreading!” thought Dim, annoyed “Okay, okay, calm down…they’re not using it as an insult…” he said to the mayor, that it was nice to meet her, as politely as he could.
“It’s nice to meet you too, Mr. Bulb.” The mayor said. “When did you arrive though? Usually, we would have noticed you come in earlier, from somepony walking around. But nobody noticed anything.”
“Um, yeah. Ms.Mayor, He came in today, thanks to a spell of mine. Unfortunately, I kind of messed up. You see, he’s hu-” Twilight began.
Dim immediately covered her mouth with his hoof, before she could say ‘human’.
“H-hungry. I’m from another land, you see, and I… haven’t had a bite to eat for a while.” Dim said nervously.
“Oh… I-I see.” The mayor said, a little confused by what had just happened. She brushed it off quickly though. “Well, I could give you a few recommendations for where you could eat.”
She then went to a small table, with many shelves in the back of the Town Hall, each one holding multiple scrolls. She picked up one of them with her mouth, carried it back to Dim, and dropped it in front of him. Dim was a bit hesitant to take it with his mouth, for he was afraid he’d get end up getting something weird in his mouth, eventually. But he had no other choice, since he had a lack of opposable thumb, or fingers, for that matter. Unfurling it, he found the scroll listed all the places he could buy food within Ponyville. The list included a few restaurants, some food shops, and many food stands.
“Ah… thank you very much. I can’t wait to try the foods of Equestria.” Dim said, rolling the scroll up and picking it up, bowing his head in thanks.
“Why, it’s not a problem at all!” the mayor said. “We don’t get many visitors to Ponyville, especially from other lands, so it’s the least I can do. It was a pleasure meeting you, Mr. Bulb.”
“You too, Ms. Mayor.” said Dim, voice muffled by the scroll in his mouth. He then pushed both Twilight and Spike away from the town hall.
After they got a considerable distance from the town hall, Dim stopped pushing the two, and he took his hoof away from Twilight’s mouth.
Twilight glared at Dim. “What was that for?”
He spit out the scroll. “Well, I’d prefer if fewer people…I mean, ponies, knew I was a human.” Dim explained, trying to placate her. “I don’t want to attract too much attention to myself…And besides, if we told them, they’d all think I’m crazy, wouldn’t they?”
“Well, yeah, I guess…” said Twilight, realizing what would’ve happen if ponies found out he was human.
“Anyways, let’s go get some food to eat. I wasn’t lying about the being hungry part…” Dim said, his stomach rumbling. “Any of these you’d recommend?”
Twilight picked up, and unrolled the parchment with magic. She looked down the list, and then pointed out that a few of the options would be on the way to where she was planning to take him next, but the closest one was a restaurant. So they decided to go there and eat.